Make a Mascot for Nintendo Direct

Jason James
Jason James

One day you are appointed by the president of Nintendo to create a mascot for Nintendo Direct. The mascot will essentially be the speaker replacing Satoru Iwata from past directs.

You're given absolute freedom to create whatever you want so long as it isn't copyrighted.

What do?

Logan Campbell
Logan Campbell

I'M NOT IWATA… I'M MY ORIGINAL CHARACTER BLIWATA

gazes longingly at vegetables

John Rogers
John Rogers

Just noticed my name is Todd Howard

What the fuck Holla Forums?

Luis Miller
Luis Miller

Nintendo have already turned half of their staff into mascots.

Sebastian Myers
Sebastian Myers

I was only pretending

Lincoln Edwards
Lincoln Edwards

Whelp, can't do anything about it now can I?

Daniel Hernandez
Daniel Hernandez

Fuck that, we're using titty nee-san. Her game is terrible but her love is pure.

Samuel Barnes
Samuel Barnes

Do you think Miyamoto is like Pee-Wee Herman where he's an idol to children by day, and jerking himself off in strip clubs at night?

Thomas Myers
Thomas Myers

Probably, I've heard he's a Japanese Steve Jobs.

Jacob Garcia
Jacob Garcia

You sure Myamoto isn't too old to get it up?

Grayson Price
Grayson Price

His office is off-limits since >muh inspiration space

Skip to 1:20

Thomas Cooper
Thomas Cooper

What am I watching user?

Leo Powell
Leo Powell

Japanese Steve Jobs

Brody Howard
Brody Howard

make a macot

Why? They already have reggie.

Angel Johnson
Angel Johnson

I can't draw for shit so I'll just have to write this out

How about:
qt anime woman, bordering on milf
black hair wearing business suit because let's be honest most everyone wears those fucking things in Nintendo Directs
really likes cherries due to >muh Japanese mythology
has a strange fascination for cuteboys and other women her age

Her name would be Cho, which is short for chokusetsu (i.e. direct).

Apologies for the autism.

Jeremiah Ward
Jeremiah Ward

Genderbend Satoru Iwata, make her a cute rock monster (is such a thing possible? One way to find out) and presto, Iwa-tan is here to bring the news directree to yu.

Isaiah Bell
Isaiah Bell

I tried to capture the essance of on-disc DLC and lacklustre first party support for their flagship console amidst pissing off every third party developer with their insistance of shitty gimmicks even nintendo can't make fun games with and exceptionally piss poor hardware in a generation of piss poor hardware

Adrian Rogers
Adrian Rogers

First thought would be to have puppets, like they did that E3. Maybe they could bring Nikki back.
As for people, they'd have to find someone kinda well known and who knows some English, to make things easier. I don't think Miyamoto and Sakurai can speak it, and I can't think of anyone else aside from Reggie.

Japanese
Nah, everyone knows he's Mexican

Brody Lopez
Brody Lopez

Kimishima can speak english

Noah Williams
Noah Williams

Alright. Here you go.

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