Of course it takes effort! I don't even plan on getting married yet because I have some of my own standards that I still have to meet before getting into a relationship. It's a work in progress though.
I personally know a great woman that has standards. For example, I think some kid offered her a quarter (maybe some other coin of slight value) if she would kiss him, back in kindergarten, and she turned him down. She eventually went on to marry a great guy. Their wedding was the first kiss either of them had had, and first boyfriend/girlfriend relationship too.
My sister once explained to me that any woman that I go for should also be able to support herself without me. Also, despite her being able to support herself, she affirms that her husband is the head of the household.
Why does she have these moral standards? Because she's a Christian, and not a fake one either. She takes it very seriously.
With that said, I have other sisters and brothers. One of my sisters has a couple of mixed-race white/black kids. She's not married. Another sister of mine is also not married, and has kids as well. Not black, but they also hardly have a father. My mom had a kid when wasn't married at some point as well, and the fact that brother didn't know his own father very much actually bothered him a great deal, early on. I still love my family, of course, but they've made some mistakes. But, I believe most of them recognize it. Plus, those 2 other sisters also came from a different father, and they were treated pretty harshly, from what I understand. For example, getting kicked out of the house at 18, and having to fend for themselves at that point.
Anyway, as to your kids. It's not hard to raise kids if you already have standards. Your kids will follow you, first and foremost. If you're not active in their lives, then the media takes that spot. Of course, they will learn from outside influences too, but what you teach them will be the filter for how they process it. I assume you don't look at liberal propaganda and go "that looks great", and no kids of mine will either, and I'd hope none of your kids would. The thing is, I'm going to teach my kids a lot of stuff. I'm also going to teach them to teach themselves things. I might have them do a freeform lookup of information that I already know all about, and essentially grade them on it. I'll teach them how logic works, and how to use it. I'll teach them about Christianity, and God. I'll teach them about all of this great stuff. The only reason why it would turn out like crap is if I was the first piece of crap. Also, I would have my kids do work around the house for payment from me, and I would have them pay for their own things. That would teach them the value of money, and the monetary value of things. I would also not put my kids through school, at all. Maybe preschool stuff, to get the written language down, but after that, they will learn elsewhere, and if they need to learn something on the books, we will cross that hurdle when we get there. I would never marry a woman who didn't recognize me as the head of the household, and thus sabotage the order of things, either, because that's a simple biblical truth.
