To everyone shitting on America

sup Holla Forums?

Cuba?

Migrate to Canada.

They really like gringos down there?

If I were an American, I would look at all these buttmad Russians in this thread and laugh like this:
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"
Then I would continue eating my unhealthy snacks and drinking diet soda(to make up for them, you know) while shitposting on the internet.

idk bail my white son out of his 5th rape allegation

But jail would ruin his bright future. Hell, he could even be president one day.

revolt

Probably kill myself.
I'm American btw

HWNDU.

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Japan maybe.. then again… maybe not…
Canada?

Like some place we haven't fucked with yet would be preferable.

how about hawaii?

If I were to wake up as an American tomorrow? I would obviously just kill myself.
But if I were born as one then I would probably convert to Islam and blow myself up together with some fat burgers. Obese Americans are already explosions in slow motion anyway.

I'd be much stupider, and thus perhaps in some way happier. (Part of the reason I started "pulling the thread" on capitalism as a teen is how my experience of life as Brit didn't align with the Americanized media I was consuming.)
I think on my deathbed I'd realize I'd been chasing an illusion, and that happiness doesn't lie just beyond the next paycheque and isn't achieved via consumption. All the same in the end, if that's the case. I'd probably have some meme goal like moving to California.

Alternatively: Run for president and intentionally balkanize the place.

Hwat?

Wow… that's norows down the list a lot..

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I can't even say "the moon"…

What if you already California?

#Calexit?

Yup, that's because of burgerization of the whole world.

California-Scotland-Quebec confederation when?
1. we all hate the English
2. we all hate the Americans
3. Holywood can make bank selling films dramatizing the independence struggles and oppression by the former unions.

We really hate Hollywood. The relationship wouldn't last.

YES! I've been rooting for Scotch-exit for years now!

I apologize on behalf of The Simpons.

If it makes you feel better most people in LA hate Hollywood.

I am American, but I wish I was Euro with a cute accent :c

Do everything possible to initiate total Nuclear Armageddon for the survival of the few untouched zones of wildlife and natural resources on this planet.

If i grew up in America surrounded with propaganda and third world tier education, i'd probably end up either a MAGA tard or a shitlib tbh.
How did Burger comrades come to their current state of mind?

I dunno. Hard to pick really.

So many choices.

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Which one is your favorite?

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I would shoot drumpf or other porky.

Save us Hollywood! I know it's not an 'exotic' as Africa or Asia but the proximity has to be convenient at least.

That last one is a genetic disease.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harlequin-type_ichthyosis

Beat you to the door!

That's what I get for trusting image search. Glad we're not behind every deformed baby.

eat a shitload of burgers and hate mexicans…. what kind of a question is that?

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1 remember the alamo
2 honor your ancestors
3 read the constitution
4 vote republican
5 own a gun
6 dont drink the water they put things in it to make you forget like lead
7 get scammed by a second hand car salesman
8 smoke pot and get imprisoned
9 get jewed by a lawyer
10 kurt kobaine in the membrane

eat a load of shit burgers and hire mexicans…what kind of a answer is that?

Socialists should own guns. I'm somewhat glad we burger socialists have the freedom to do this even if I think it's the result of a retarded misinterpretation of a "right" designed so ensure state lap dogs and volunteers could have weapons

Just kidding, American beef is the tastiest in the whole word and available at a great price you guys should guard that shit jealously it is prime supreme and the euronigs will try to steal it from you if they find out.

I wasn't even joking for the first 6 in that list.

Texan?

I made some things out of one of these before

Well I'm not American so my opinion doesn't matter but I interpret the second amendment to mean literally there should be organized militias maintained in most towns, they should keep the guns under lock and key in a designated miltia building somewhere and/or in people's homes with no open or concealed carry allowed since it isnt mentioned in the amendment. You shouldn't even be allowed to own a gun unless you can prove you are part of a militia since thats what the amendment actually says.

Good lord no, I'm British.

The Alamo is just a place where we drink beer during movies nowadays anyways.

Do you mean to tell me that Americans in the modern era choose not to read the great and artistic works of the great American philosophers and thinkers of the 19th century and earlier?

Ehhhh? Davey Crocket shouldn't have angered the Tanuki

I'm a john kenichi tier ameriboo. I dream of the great plains and lexington every night. I've read every page of GW's memoirs. If I had a daki it would have a bald eagle backdropped by the red white and blue. There's only one wall paper in my room, its the bill of rights layered repeatedly in its entirety 3.7 times around the room. I once visited Florida on holiday (vacation to you brave free men) and it was the most transformative week of my life. The armed border security, toll roads, asshole drivers who honk all the time and drive on the wrong side of the road. The yellow school buses, suburban hellscapes that go on further than your eyes can bleed with a pool alligator in every back garden (yard) and swamp puddle along the road. Truly it was a magical place

damn, love the first one. 'woodcut?' hmm

I'd probably try to live the life of middle-class hedonism that American pop culture conditioned me all my life for. A comfy college experience with sexual experimentation, trying various drugs and using them with some regularity, settle into the mid-tier, decent-paying job my degree "entitles" me to, wasting a lot of money on silly hobbies, falling into the habit of frequent casual sex etc.

But alas, I'll have to make do with a boring and quasi-monastic existence, cut short by suicide that the aforementioned drugs could have made me avoid.

Thats what you get for being poor.

Why am I not surprised.

American here. Was shitlib. Most people with some amount of braincells wanted bernie to win. Some (mostly third world feminists) wanted Hillary to win. Politics here is cancer. I want out of this political cancer. Half of the time I debate someone it's either Holla Forums level circlejerk shit or dumb libshit stuff. You can't have a serious conversation about politics here once you make it apparent you're a communist/actual leftist, they'll just say generic retarded shit like "But what about food? People need food!". It's tiring. Holla Forums is my only escape for political interaction that isn't cancer.

The woman punching the baby is bad enough, but those pants!

then start reading dude

Balkanization when?

I don't see a single attractive person in that photo.

I've never seen a single attractive person in my entire life except for on the computer.

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I'm recommending you the father of Nietzsche yes.

Free Territory of Maine when?

Honestly what the FUCK is America even doing to begin with?

I mean I have my theories but they're incredibly depressing.

Leave obviously

Burgersoc here, currently in the process of converting every conservative here into a communist, it's really easy if you are funny and not a pussy, conservatives are way more open to ideas if you can make them simple and appeal to their individual desires. All I do is take stirner arguments and reword them, they like that. Americans need stirner bad, it's the only thing that can save this hell hole

to be fair, radioactivity causing mutations, irradiations cases could sometime create "classical" genetic diseases cases.

This just gave me PURE cancer. I mean seriously, straight to stage 4, my hair is falling out. Thanks a bunch pal.

Kill myself

I came here to post this, but it was too late.

I am American, and I hate it. The recent election has had me pretty disillusion, but it's been a longtime coming since reading all the shit the US has done to other usually smaller countries since at least the mid-19th centuries. Even to its own people, the US is disgusting, like all the government agencies experimenting and lying to us.
Imagine living in a time-line where the Soviets won and the US collapsed, they would have so much "This is how life under capitalism was, the government deceived its own people!" shit to work with.
I'm just NEETing until I go homeless.

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This is what I would do if I where American.
Nothing to do with leftism, just seems like a really nice place to live.

This tbh. I'm not even American but they get too much shit on here. I know its just bantz but political culture in pretty much all Western countries is shit with ignorance and bootlicking galore (maybe with the exception of France). Young Americans also at least seems to be moving in the right direction with Bernie, DSA, rejecting the dems etc. At least they aren't becoming increasingly reactionary like many European countries (and no Trump doesn't count he is better then mainstream republicans imo).

Pull a Novatore and travel across the country until I get killed or I get tired of it and move to Alaska.

America-lite is still better than America.

They're paying people to leave tho. I don't think it's that easy.

I suppose. The main benefit is knowing my money wasn't going directly to finance all the dastardly shit the feds are up to.