Sea of Thieves

Rareware is nothing but a brand. You can't just round up the old people who worked there. They'll be too scattered, you'd never get them all, and they'd all be very different people from who they were more than a decade ago, working in a very different industry. It's gone, let go of the brand and forget about them. They're not coming back.

AC4 was actually a pretty fun, if shallow, pirate game. The only problem is fighting with the game constantly to not play shitty assassin's creed. However sailing on the ocean while your crew sings shanties is fucking great. It had me go through a phase of listening folk music.

I think I'll put the PSP version on my PSP right now actually. I've never finished a game though and wondering how much replayability it has when factoring in different starting classes, scenarios, and difficulty levels.

I keep seeing things about how bad this is, but what actually makes it bad? Just mediocre highly generic pirates?

Pirates with nothing to do, all the loot is just cosmetic differences. Not even a shallow RPG grind.

think no man's sky 2.0

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Apparently the only things you can buy are cosmetic and the quests are all fetch quests, so the game doesn't have depth… or breadth.

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More like 0.5 since it's set in the past.

Rareware also holds valuable IP like Perfect Dark. Even if Nintendo got a small fraction of the original talent back, people would flip over a new Perfect Dark that didn't suck ass, a new Banjo, etc. Here's what we could get if Nintendo bought Rareware back
Really, all Rareware needs back are the Stamper brothers, who already left. I'm pretty sure after seeing what Rareware did with Nintendo, and what MS did to it, a lot of Rareware people would come crawling back.

I didn't save any of the pictures from the other thread, but I'm sure someone will post them.

That sounds incredibly boring. Especially annoying that they would also focus on making it work better for streaming instead of being playable.

They got an extra 200 viewers since I took this screenshot. And christ those Sea of Thieves streams are painful to listen to.

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Bought it 2 weeks ago. Played it for 3 hours and uninstalled it. Game is boring, repetitive, easy, no progression, and pvp is just ganky bullshit.

LIMITLESS POSSIBILITIES

I got this, against my better judgement, because I had two friends who wanted to play it with me and co-op multiplayer is the entire point.
I bring information about WHY it sucks massive cock, so you can go into arguments informed and armed.

When you first start, there is no character creator. Just half a dozen randomly generated pirates to choose from. If you don't like them you can generate a new set until there's one you like. They're all some shade of brown, arguably some are white but most are brown. I let it slide because sailors spend all day in the sun and they're gonna be tanned. But they're all UGLY AS FUCK also. If you're one of those people who was gonna use the character creator to make Shrek anyway, you'll love it. I chose a fat guy with a mullet and a mustache who looks like he should be helming an '86 Camaro instead of a boat.
The option to play solo in a Sloop exists, but it's trash. The game is designed around having a crew to help you run the boat. This is no Black Flag where you can both steer and use cannons. You can only do one thing at once. Steer, change sail length, change sail angle, aim a cannon, reload a cannon, fire a cannon. These are all exclusive to each other and cannot be multitasked by one person.
The other options for crew (matchmaking) are:
Sloop with 2 people
Galleon with 3 people
Galleon with 4 people
The Galleon is slower than a sloop, harder to control, and because the whole game is in first person, you can't fucking see where you're going at full sail because the sails block your vision at the helm. It also has 3 full length decks, which means two of them under the water line to run up and down fixing holes and bailing water if you take damage. There's no magic bucket that automatically empties the water you've taken on, you have to fill the bucket once and then run up 2 flights of stairs and throw it overboard, and repeat. The galleon does have 8 cannons though (sloop has 4), and if all of them (on one side) are manned competently, you can easily fuck up someone else's day in a single pass.

If you're playing with only 2 people, I've found you encounter MANY more players than if you play with 3 or 4. There doesn't appear to be any kind of skill or level-based matchmaking so I'm not sure why this is. When I was alone or on a 2-man crew with one friend, I was constantly beset upon by other ships out to sink me and steal my shit. This is, at first, the most annoying part of the game. Not griefers, because if you could just kill them and have reasonable assurance you'd never have to see them again, or respawn at the starter island, it would be whatever. The death/respawn system itself is rage-inducing. WHEN ANYONE DIES, THEY RESPAWN AT APPROXIMATELY THE SAME LOCAITON THEY DIED, 10 SECONDS LATER. If a griefer boards your ship and kills you, you'll just respawn 10 seconds later and he'll kill you again. If you kill him, he'll just respawn 10 seconds later for his revenge. Repeat until someone tires of the process and fucks off. It's absolutely the dumbest fucking thing I've witnessed in my video game career. If you sink a ship, that's another story, because it'll respawn at the nearest island instead. But if the griefing is taking place at a dock where you're attempting to turn in some quest items (to quest NPCs) for rewards, then you and your ship will just keep respawning at the same dock where you died, near that same asshole with his galleon parked with all the guns aiming at your spawn point, ready to kill you again. Worth noting- if your ship sinks you don't automatically die, you can just swim. To get the ship back, you have to talk to a Poseidon-like dude in the water where it sank and he'll give it back. But you lose any cargo (quest rewards) you had collected. The only good part about this PVP is that there are no upgrades in the game at all that make people better at combat, so every encounter is pure skill. But a total lack of upgrades is kinda bullshit for different reasons I'll get into later.

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I was becoming annoyed by being constantly attacked by jackasses, even when I had nothing of value to steal, and was relieved when it stopped when I got on a 4-person crew. I thought "finally, I have some peace to get into the meat of the game and actually earn some gold." We took some missions and set off. The mission types are:
Merchants- acquire something and deliver it to a buyer. Chickens, Snakes, Pigs, maybe a crate of tea or something IDK. I assume there's a note or some shit you have to bring back to cash in and prove you made the delivery.
Gold- find a treasure chest with a map that has an X on it, dig up the chest, bring it back for the guy to open.
Spirits- Kill reanimated skeletons until their high-value leader shows up, kill him, bring back his glowing skull.

It says "voyage completed" when you complete the objective out at sea, but you don't get any rewards like money or reputation until you come back to a person of that faction and turn in the object in question. So, the dock where all these quest NPCs hang out is where griefers lie, who will steal your items to earn themselves some gold instead, even if they hadn't activated that quest yet and presumably earn no reputation from the act.
Unfortunately, this meat of the game is trash. We took on a lengthy Spirit voyage with 5 skeleton targets to kill, that took us to 5 different islands where we fought hundreds of enemies. The combat is absolute shit. You can swing a sword 3 times, brief pause, and swing it 3 more times OR do a stabbing lunge forward that leaves you out of breath and vulnerable for too long afterwards. Your single-shot pistol only has 5 bullets before you have to run to an ammo crate in a different physical location and refill your… pockets? I guess? And the pistol doesn't kill skeletons (or other players) in one shot, and isn't accurate for sniping, so it's practically useless. What little there is to the combat isn't even enjoyable because of the super high ping you're dealing with from the not-MMO netcode (think Destiny with boats). When you kill a skeleton you aren't even sure he's died until a full second later when he explodes, and you're not sure if you finished him off or one of your friends did. There are different guns and swords you can buy in shops, but I learned from my one friend who's been playing longer that THEY HAVE NO FUNCTIONAL DIFFERENCE from the beginner pistol. There's a sniper and a blunderbuss and they perform exactly the fucking same. Which brings me to the next complaint.

Why do MMOfags keep falling for this lie?

There is a ton of shit to buy at first glance, but no reason to have any of it. Every single thing you can purchase in the game is cosmetic. I understand they didn't want to make the PVP unbalanced, but that could have easily been solved with level-based matchmaking, or just having designated safe areas around ports, and PVP areas the further you got into the open ocean. This is the lowest effort I've ever seen put into an MMO-like game. You thought fucking Destiny was bad? It doesn't hold a shit-candle to this. There's tons of clothing, ship decorations, guns, different cosmetic modifications of your various tools that you'd rather not see because it means your ship is broken, accordions, shovels, etc. Tons of shit to buy. Expensive shit that will take a lot of gold farming to buy. And none of it means a damn thing. No weapon will make you dispatch skeletons or other players any faster. Nobody will give a shit about your ship's paintjob when they're killing you and stealing your loot. Your character's looks can't be improved with clothing because you're all ugly cunts. WHY would I want to increase my reputation or earn more gold to buy these things? I wouldn't. It reminds me of Monster Hunter, where the whole of the game is killing bigger monsters to get better equipment to kill bigger monsters to get better equipment to kill bigger monsters. Except in Monster Hunter, the combat is its own reward, killing monsters is fun. In Sea of Thieves, killing skeletons or chasing chickens around is not fun. Killing other players is not fun because everyone rubberbands around with high ping.

SAILING YOUR SHIP ISN'T EVEN THAT FUN. It was much better in AC Black Flag. I give them kudos on being able to independently control every sail and cannon and requiring teamwork to be successful, and the way you have to angle your sails to catch the wind the best, or raise them to slow down, and the way anchor drops work, but it's not FUN. It's difficult to maneuver your Galleon in any meaningful way when you're in combat with another, and it's easiest to simply run away, they'll never catch you. Ramming another ship does more damage to your own than to theirs, and you can't increase your hull strength. They have that goofy shit where you can fire yourself out of a cannon to board others, but it's literally the only goofy inventive thing in the entire game. And I'd much prefer the ability to swing on ropes like a real fucking pirate would, and like you could in Black Flag. You can climb to a crows nest and stand on beams, but you can't rope swing down or stick a knife in the sail and slide, or anything cool. You can jump down onto the deck and take fall damage, jump into the water, or attempt to get back on the ladder.

Is this a new crowbcat or something?

I realized after playing for a couple quests, that the reason everyone was PVP griefing me when I started, is that it's the only way to have even the smallest amount of fun playing this game. It's the only thing to do. NPC-given quests are boring and meaningless. Skeletons aren't fun to kill, chickens and pigs aren't fun to catch, treasure isn't fun to dig up and doesn't even give you enough reward to buy a pair of pants until you grind 80 hours to get better-tier missions. The only thing that could be considered remotely fun is to harass other players, stealing their shit for an easy buck. Which is why everyone does it.

A minor complaint but hugely embarassing when compared with other pirate games- There are like six songs max that you can play on the accordion, what the fuck? Didn't Black Flag have like 50 fucking sea shanties in it, with words and everything?

This game is concentrated garbage, the combined non-efforts of an entire studio of slackjawed idiots trying to piss away millions of Microsoft's dollars and get away with it while doing 15 minutes of work a day, and isn't even worth $5. It offers less to do and less fun than some gacha mobileshit.

Ask me anything I haven't yet answered.

yes

Oh and I almost forgot, the enemy variety may as well not exist. The different types I've seen are
Standard skelly- easy
Blue Bandana skelly- has a sword or a pistol, shoots you
Wild Boys (apparently)- covered in seaweed, jumps out of bushes at you like a vietcong
Boss- has a blunderbuss or something, usually a cool coat or hat, a lot of health

THAT'S IT. All can be easily dealt with if you don't allow yourself to be surrounded and just dance around them swinging your sword.

Bless you for taking the time and actually explaining what you dislike.

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Only reason to keep an eye on this shitshow now is for the drama and salt.

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Also there's no tutorial ingame.

If you decide to play solo, good luck fucking doing anything.

I figured at least this way my money spent on this pile could go to some meager use.

It's okay I got a new job and I would have just spent it on junk food anyway.

You can thankfully increase the FOV to 90.

Always kill the hype.
Never pay for western games.

This.
Let go of attachments to their former good games.
Even the former talents are shit now.

So do you not know any other words or do you just choose to use the same sentence in every thread?

Never pay for games period. PIRATE EVERYTHING.

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I mean, I'm not going to defend the unfinished multiplayer-only piece of shit, but at least check the facts.

I like boats in MMORPGs.

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I saw sea of thieves and it got me interested to get blackwake,i did,and i've been having a fun time with it.

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Illegal except for loot boxes. That's why it's voltorb flip and not slots in Pokemon anymore.
Raises the ESRB rating.
Sexist slime.
Toxic masculinity.
Glorifying slavery.
Torture, which is cruelty.
Truth is relative, therefore morality is relative, therefore nothing is bad, therefore nothing is good, therefore there's no grey area.
You could put antisemitic statements in those bottles.
Combat is a buzzword.
Griefing.

And that's why games aren't fun anymore.

There are messages in a bottle, they are shit.

the game is severely limited in what you can do, it's not worth $60, hell it's not worth half as much, in my countries dollars too.

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At least you had the decency to post a webm, so good job for that.

What did they do for this?

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Wow two whole people who probably only stayed on for the generous retirement benefits Microsoft offers.

Meanwhile

>Rare was interested in Activision's offer, but the deal collapsed and on September 24, 2002 Microsoft purchased Rare for $375 million. 30 employees left Rare during the transition.

>On 2 January 2007, Rare founders Chris and Tim Stamper left the company to "pursue other opportunities". Former lead designer Gregg Mayles became Rare's creative director and Mark Betteridge the company's studio director.

From wikipedia, googling Mark;

This kinda explains why Rare hasn't had a hit in the last 15 years when they used to pump them out regularly.

Also these streamers talking about pokemon now have more viewers than all top 4 Sea of Thieves streamers combined.

Saging cause everything about this game is just sad and pathetic at this point.

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Does someone know who the guy that starts talking at 2:32 is?

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Is Puzzle Pirates still active? I feel that game has more content than this,

You also need to consider Nintendo vs Microsoft influence, Microsoft are undoubtedly a negative influence of every developer, and because Rare didn't enter the company with a hit they had to play to Microsofts beat unlike Bungie who did what they wanted because they made money off the bat.

I'm personally interested in seeing the confirmed trainwreck that Fable 4, or more than likely the Fable reboot will be.

Sea of Thieves defintely has it's merits but it's poorly designed in so many places, especially polish/worldbuilding and core gameplay that isn't sailing a ship.

I haven't played the game, but I've seen plenty of it's gameplay, so I thought I'd correct a few minor factual details of this. Rifles and blunderbusses do function differently from the pistol. The rifle has a scope and, I believe, either does more damage or can get headshots. The blunderbuss is basically a shotgun with a huge spread. I'm pretty sure the galleon is faster than a sloop at full sail, but it's less nimble. Merchant quests pay you once you deliver the item in question; there's no need to go back to the original quest giver. Gold quests (which are hilariously handed out by the most obvious jews Rare could have made) can occasionally make you solve riddles to find buried treasure, instead of having to find a marked spot on a map. On that note, I think I should explain the island system a bit, from what I know of it. Most islands are mostly empty, aside from some wildlife, scattered minor loot, and maybe a few skeletons. These islands are where you go to find quest objectives. I should mention quests are sorta randomly generated. Then there are outposts. These are meant to be the civilized, "safe" areas of the game. Each outpost has every kind of quest giver and shop, so there's functionally no difference between them. Once you acquire a quest objective, you can go to any outpost to deliver it. Finally, there's fortresses. They have lots of skeletons in them. If there's a spooky skull cloud hovering above one, that means you can go there to fight off waves of skeletons, until the boss shows up. The boss drops a key to a vault that holds a massive amount of loot. I heard these fortresses were designed for multiple crews to cooperate in raiding, which is incredibly stupid, if true.

There is some variety to skeleton enemies, actually. I've seen metal skeletons, which have fuck ton of hp, but get all rusty and slow if you throw water on them. There's shadowy skeletons, which can only be hurt if you shine your lantern on them, first. Those are the only interesting skeleton types I've seen, though.

As far as water life is concerned, I've only seen sharks. Supposedly, there's a kraken, but, from what I understand, it basically randomly attacks ships, based on how much loot is currently being hauled in that ship. I haven't seen it in action.

The only good part of the game is the sailing mechanics. It actually takes decent crew coordination to sail well. Shit like storms will slowly flood your ship, and lightning can strike your ship. Holes in your hull only spew water when they're below the water line. The helmsman needs someone navigating to give him directions, and he needs someone on lookout to warn him of incoming obstacles. Dropping the anchor needs to be well timed, because it takes time to hit the ocean floor (though, mysteriously, there never is a fucking physical anchor attached to the ship. Your ship just magically stops.) The anchor has to be pulled up, which goes faster with more people helping. With a larger crew, sailing would be really fun. It's just awful that it's stuck in such a shitty game.

I'll give you all that and admit I haven't messed with any obviously difficult shit like the skull cloud, but what good is more enemy variety if the combat is still fucking ass? And yeah the idea of crews cooperating to raid a fortress is a fucking joke. In an entire day of playing, trying to figure out if there's any way to enjoy this game, I encountered ONE other crew who didn't immediately fire upon us. One of them stayed on his sloop and the other helped me kill skeletons. Then when we killed the boss, obviously only one of us could get the glowing skull as a reward, so I murdered him, took the skull, and hauled ass back to my crew's ship before he respawned. Little did I know one of my crew members was occupied at the same moment stealing their sloop when the second guy disembarked, which gave us a laugh at their expense when we realized we had unintentionally coordinated to fuck them over. But yeah even if you find the nicest people you'll still be forced to fuck them over somehow before they do the same to you.

It was fun for the first few hours before it became a repetitive tactic of shoot broadsides a few times -> slowly hook in -> kill rest of sailors. The only challenge were from the few legendary ships but only because they were sponges. Absolutely stale and boring. Any game can have sea shanties.

Then again pirate ship battles are inherently boring. The only good part is if it's first-person boarding with at least a good 10-15 people swinging over to an enemy ship.

Blackwake

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I thought Black Flag made ship combat as interesting as possible with the front cannons and rear explosives in addition to broadsides. It was also easier to control your ship than this mess, so you could successfully strategize and have encounters where you received zero damage by keeping your ship in their blind spots. They also had that chain cannonball thing to collapse masts. It was as interesting as 1800s ship combat can be.

It looks better than Sea of Cunts, but it's still early access. Only reason I gave this a chance was it was technically not early access anymore, and even then it was a mistake.

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I'm just saying it's probably the best pirate game on the market right now.

They can wait for my dollar. Early Access is a shit practice up there with blindly pre-ordering. They should be paying people to test their game, not the other way around.

So there's no PVE pirates and you're just pirating shit from ruins guarded by some skeletons?
And do you always have to use the same small ship? Can you at least modify it and put armor or new cannons on it?

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That's a fair statement and i respect it

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Nope.
That, your you're pirating shit from other players that they pirated from skeleton ruins.
There's two ships, a small one for crews of 1-2 players, and a big one for crews of 3-4 players.
Nope. You can only change how it looks, because the only reward in the game is purely cosmetic items.

The only modifications of anything in the entire game are cosmetic. I think you can change the ship's paint, sail color, and flag? No new guns, no additional guns, no increased damage or defense. No PVE enemies except skellingtons and snakes. No better hand-weapons for fighting them.
I don't know how they thought this would increase the streamer audience, because if it's not fun then nobody's gonna suffer to stream it.

A broken cock etc etc

user I am disappoint

Fuck you that shouldn't be funny.

(nice quads)
When Nintendo refused to outright buy Rare, everyone in the industry was confused. MS saw a golden child they could easily purchase to make their gaming division not-shit. How wrong everyone was.
Without Nintendo holding Rare to deadlines and forcing them to deliver, they became incompetent fools. It's something that gets mentioned a lot with developers who work with Nintendo, most recently Mercury Steam who admit Nintendo rejected their builds and demanding better quality, which, in Mercury Steam's own words they admit made them better developers.
Not to mention, much of the talent that made those N64 games had already left by the time Starfox Adventures released. Microsoft got a brand-name, some left-over talent, and a back catalogue of also-ran "Nintendo" characters that never got a game better than fucking first-gen 3D consoles.
Microsoft is the complete opposite. Instead of demanding quality like Nintendo did, they demand conformity to middle-management checklist bullshit. Remember that Killer Instinct only got greenlit because some MS exec promised it would be the Xbox's Smash Bros and that all internal Xbox games are pitched as the rival game to another company's product in the same genre. No fucking originality at all.

It's common knowledge that the pirate parts of Black Flag are fantastic and should be its own game, and was going to be its own game before they slapped the Ass Creed logo on it. I hadn't played since the first but I got IV for free with my video card and found it to be actually good, until you have to slog through assassin missions to get to more piracy.

Didn't Ubisoft spin it off into it's own game. Skull and Bones or something.

Nice excuse for your faggotry faggot.

Nah Skull and Bones isn't out yet, and it's a pirate themed ASSFAGGOTS game.

So do you purposefully hit your head to kill as many brain cells as possible or what?

truly a missed opportunity

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...

And from what i've seen there's only like 24 boat decorations as opposed to like 3 pages of weapons/clothing.

And this, is why you don't fuck with the 'game' part in Video Game.

His hair looks like Kazooie.

As someone agdg-ing my own game I really don't understand how this happens. How they pour so much time and money into a game without asking themselves, "Is this actually fun? Is this good game design?". Before I ever even think about writing my first line of code I am constantly thinking about what could be a fun and unique idea for a game, and then constantly being self-critical about it.

They could have made a barebones prototype in a month and realized that it sucked.

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even the link is laughing archive.fo/AAiHA

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heh, sure showed those [CY+3 buzzword] players

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Why even give the option to encounter other players in the first place then?

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I actually like the idea of a brig in a pirate game. That scuttle ship thing is probably the most retarded 'feature' I have ever heard of though.

There are slices of fun to be had. But you see them all and experience most of them within the first 20 hours of play. Its a fully workable game. But it is missing REASON and PURPOSE for the actions you take. With no goals or unlocks and no drawbacks for failure that mean something it has no soul.

Dark souls is an example of a game where you cant really lose, but in pvp you can LOSE your souls and that can set you back a few hours if you mess up.

This game needed some consequences to the actions.

I've only observed Sea of Thieves via Forsen's stream and I must say most of complaints sound like World of Warcraft fags whining about their lack of single player content in a multiplayer game. It doesn't matter how much a gold chest is worth what matters is that you bullied it out of a xbox-faggot by threatening him at gunpoint, stealing it silently off his ship or just sinking him while he flails around trying to hit you with a controller. The game might be worth 10$ but has any reviewer even tried to act like a pirate and play the game as it is intended - by griefing others?

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No, because as shows, griefing is toxic and we can't have that.

DSP was always a voice of reason.

Kill yourself nigger, this turd was made for retards like you.

No, that's as good as an excuse for your unabashed faggotry as exists.

I'm glad I'm not an Ubisoft fan.

It's really limited, you have a crew size of 4 men; I'd imagine it's hard to stealthily board another crews ship when your ship stands out against the horizon so blatantly.

Griefing is literally the only way to have fun in this game, and they didn't even design it that way intentionally. They designed Destiny with Boats And Less Enemies, and then allowed PVP..

The Brig has no reason to exist because
1. you can only use it on members of your crew, you can't knock out an enemy and stick him in there
2. members of your crew can't really do fucking anything to grief you since there's no friendly fire, and if they try to steal a reward for themselves you all still get the cash when he turns it in.
The worst thing a crewmate could do to fuck with you is take the helm and steer your ship into rocks. Or use up all your cannon balls firing at nothing.

I guess their intention for the brig was to throw (((toxic))) players inside them if they were being mean in chat and get them to apologize through some gay forced intervention. What I don't understand is whats stopping those players from simply quitting out of the game to leave the brig to avoid apologizing to a bunch of over sensitive soy boys, or whats stopping the rest of the crew from randomly imprisoning someone for shits and giggles. couldn't you theoretically form a group of three with your friends and randomly match make the fourth crew member for the sole purpose of throwing them in the brig to grief them? wouldn't that in itself be more (((toxic))) in the long run than the simple kick option that's been available in multiplayer games forever? did the dev's think this through at all?

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He can put you in brig, duh.

Yeah. But

isn't there someway to play this game for free for a certain time? I think some user in this thread might have mentioned it before but I can't be bothered to read through everything again. also.

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Because they don't play games, simple as that. They belong to the same crowd of fuckups like webm related. They have some vague understanding of what a game is and what they want to do with it (in this case created a soyboy hugbox), but since all they "play" are retard proof walking simulators they lack the capacity to figure out how to make a game fun.

Oh boy, that's not kosher at all user, a work environment needs to be sensitive first and foremost. After all, it's not your money you're pissing away.

No, they couldn't. They have no frame of reference as to what makes a game good or not.

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That webms hurt me on a personal level.

please tell me that's satire, their just mocking that polygon plays doom video right guys?

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What the fuck am I even watching? This can't be real, right?

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That makes me think though, what is microsoft doing? you'd think they would be making games or contracting someone else to make games for them but I barely ever hear about any. Even if you dont want to make new IP's they could just take old rareware games and remake them as exclusives. I do know about the rare collection but that is just ports of old games.

I mean why even buy rareware if you aren't going to make any new games with them?

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shit man who is the girl in leotard? I like the style.

I think microsoft is intentional trying to tank the xbox brand and games division, even nintendo at least tried to salvage wii u with some new original games while M$ gives zero fucks.

...

is it the dark queen? doesn't really look like her to be honest.

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Thought you were replying to
My bad.

Are they trying to intentionally drive Windows into the ground too?

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Wow, is that game the new dark souls or what.
I like the retro graphics but it is a bit dark.

I mean if it were sandboxy enough it could be fun. As in you could shape the game-world yourself with your crew.

But you don't seem to have any effect whatsoever on the gaming-world besides being in there.

Is he playing with a graphics tablet?

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Reminder that WoW's main gameplay designer plays with a tablet.

If the world was more active and there was a trading company/navy faction for PvP, the game would be instantly better. Sadly, they released a full price game with early access content. Maximum Jewry on MS part.

Microsoft knew that they had no games this year, so they needed to shit something out. I might be wrong, but it wouldn't surprise me if this was rushed out the door unfinished, EA-style.

It can be taught!
Wait sorry spoke too soon.

I really have to wonder how they managed to reach such levels of incompetence they have nothing to offer to entice people to buy their flagship product.

Well, we know that Nip faggot eventually managed to jump over the pillar. They can learn, just as downies can be taught, it just takes a lot of time.

if anyone has bought this after playing the beta has to be completely retarded. like the video says, there is fucking nothing to do in the game other than go to island, shoot skellys,dig up chest, go back, and maybe meet other players that will kill you, and that's fucking it, like people said last time this is a streamer bait game that has no actual meaningful content like fortnite, you have to be a Grade A retard to buy this at any price at all, i bet my right testicle that they will implement a function to ban people that "stream snipe" to defend their only source of marketing

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The 360 ran games better in most cases than the PS3 did, and was easier to develop for, so even if nips didn't like Microsoft, they made games for them anyway. They threw all that away with the reveal of the Xbox One, and haven't recovered since. No nip games, western games running worse than on PS4, and no exclusives.

Considering how much focus they put on streamers, I think they were fully expecting the online multiplayer element to be "the fun" for this game. As in, the wacky interactions and unexpected outcomes would be some kind of "emergent storytelling" which would be gimmicky enough to hook players and make them love the game in spite of its lacking content. Game Devs and major studios have been trying to milk this shit for years now, desperately trying to make a game that is just barely playable, but has enough wacky shit in it that people buy it up so they can create their own wacky moment of zany gameplay to post up on youtube or stream on twitch.

Win10 and Xbone exclusivity was all the information you needed.

I found it.

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How can people be this bad at playing FPSes? If you can't make the gamepad work, why don't you try kb&m? Whaaa?

somehow I doubt they would be much better with a Kb+M. Then again I am 10x worse off with a gamepad so maybe they will get better.

You might just as well ask why they can't chew gum and walk at the same time. People who play FPS games on pad are retarded.

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What's wrong with slowdown while choosing items?

In Australia, $60 USD would be 80 AUD.

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Video games are patient zero for software ebola.

I'd like to play gears of war games on my pc but i will never install w10.

lol

I only ever played the first one and would like to see the complete story.

...

Fuck this gay earth.

Honestly I think having an Xbone is less cancerous than using Windows 10/Steam. Yeah, it's still a botnet software platform, but at least it's not botnetting your general purpose personal computer. Xbone can only botnet itself.

The story is secondary, if you're really that interested watch a cutscene movie on youtube.

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True, but at the same time, why own a botnet if it has no games worth playing?

Why fucking pay for a botnet if has no games worth playing?

Reminder Scalebound was cancelled for this.

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but they don't even know how to use a gamepad, why stunt yourself with a worse control device if you can't even use it properly?

REALLY? Well nice to know fellow image board anonymous! Please come back to tell me how to preorder the next xbox "exclusive" from rare!

Jk, there is not going to be a new rare game lmao.

Discord is fucking cancer, don't even get me started. I use Mumble, no one using Discord is worth talking to.

If the last E3 showing was any indication that was a gift.

Scalebound was already ruined when they turned the loli protagonist into blonde Donte.

Pretty sure that was cancelled for two Bayonetta games.

I used it for a bit because I knew a few cool groups moved on to it, but the switch seemed to expose them as the faggots that they are. Makes me wonder why I ever bothered.

...

That's problematic talk, mister. Are you implying that a console experience may not be 100% equivalent to a PC? The industry has been telling people a gamepad is a fine way to play FPSs for at least a decade; most of the nu-males who cover video games sincerely don't know why people would choose KB+M over it. It is no exaggeration to say they are infants who not only play nothing but AAA slop, but don't understand and don't WANT to understand why anyone would play anything else.

The only three GOOD pirate games ever are Port Royale, Tropico 2 and The Curse of Monkey Island (or the whole series rather but whatever).

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Entire pirate setting is criminally underrated.

Also before you even start playing, you have to accept a code of conduct (you can't be "toxic" in a pirate game, pirates are all friendly and equals and all that shit).
Even the real pirates weren't that gay.

This guy has definitely played the game. I am playing through the game pass trial and my experience has been exactly the same. This game is going to be the Xbone's No Man's Sky once people get over the hype. There is fucking NOTHING in this game. 1987 Pirates! has more depth.

My nigga

Oh this game is 100% shit and you should absolutely feel vindicated.

It does.

What about Sid Meier's Pirates? Corsairs series? Crimson Skies?

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Looks exactly like Rare's female staff.

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Its like this game was made by 56% meme spammer.

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The Asian up front is kinda cute but I bet she's like 55 years old because Asians just age that way.

These are ps2 tier models.

That dog is not happy to be seen with those people.

90% of them are HR, PR and box art.

Now that's insulting. Here's an actual PS2 model for you, user.

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How long was the game in development? From what I see it has outrageously little content.

they are worse

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3 years bare minimum. Probably closer to 5.

Kikapedia, so take it however you will.

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Don't insult the PS2 like that.

Holy shit, I was just about to post that gif.

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user…

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They look purposefully bad. The black one looks like it used to be a samoan guy, before Rare decided to be more progressive. The third one looks like it was a skeleton, before someone decided that it had to be female. The first one looks like it may have been a guy as well and that dyke haircut is beyond awful.

wew
I wish I could catch (((Rare)))'s codemonkeys and torture them to know what the fuck they've been doing this whole time. This game looks like a tech demo when it ought to have tamable sea serpents, floating city on a giant turtle to board and plunder and whatnot after 4 years.

So far the only somewhat entertaining thing I've seen come out of the gameplay was someone killing themselves in a mildly funny way to end their session.

From what I've seen the map is really small, I don't understand how you could set out to create a vast pirate adventure, and have the map be the size of a child's playpen.

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The best part is streamers have done nothing but shit on the game, making it even funnier they made their game shittier in hopes of streamer dick sucking, and instead got it in the ass.

Just say what I say, "It's windows 10 exclusive bud". Windows 10 is cancer.

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I remember faggots here shilling this gameas a service here as a success because it had big twitch numbers during the beta.
Would you look at that, every single one of them stopped playing because they weren't being paid to do it anymore.

WHY DON'T YOU FUCKING NIGGERS JUST MAKE MOVIES INSTEAD OF SHITTING UP VIDEO GAMES

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It has great potential but they dont't understand how it should be done.

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Don't remind me that that exists now. I had friends unironically suggest using it for this piece of shit. The crash cant come soon enough.

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It certainly feels that way. If they aren't trying to intentionally destroy their company they are the most incompetent shitheads that ever lived.

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You don't need a magic fucking bucket. Just a bilge pump, some variations of which have been standard on sailing vessels since ancient times. What manner of phenomenal retards developed this game who didn't even know bilge pumps were a thing - or thought it would be "fun" to run up and down three decks of ship with a goddamned bucket hauling an entire ocean of water rushing in to flood your hull one drop at a time?

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They padded the game out a fuck load with sailing time so they can read off donations, aside from the fact that you can play with a crew of 4 so they can invite 3 of their subs to play and be in the cool club. Not to mention making it braindead easy so you only need to halfway pay attention.

Microsoft's Rare

Checking your dubs to say I can appreciate that gif. Maybe it should have been named "mexican shekelrubber" though.

It's the "used boat salesman" from Secret of Monkey Island. He acts like a used car salesman stereotype, so you're not far off. He wears a sombrero because he's tacky as fuck, because those salesmen are all tacky as fuck.

Fun fact: The famous Archimedes' screw was designed specifically to act as a bilge pump for the king's new luxury yacht.

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Pumps aside crews of ships often ended like that. Pumps may be broken or they alone have no capacity to deal with the leaks so buckets running were a thing too. Especially on military ships that had ridiculously large crews for their size and had free hands to spare .

Because this game wasn't intended to be anything other than a Looney Tunes gag stretched out over tens of hours.

So, since this game sucks and the other thread died, are there any Pirate games out there that are actually good?

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It's clearly an anti-communism message.

I would have thought that walking the plank would have been an infinitely more useful way of dealing with griefers. You take the vote, and if you're on land - they are simply removed from your crew. If you're at sea - they get chucked overboard. Either through marooning or drowning - the "offending" player is immediately removed from the party where further interaction can cease. Marooned players could then be rescued by another crew via matchmaking (start a bonfire on the beach signaling lfg active matchmaking) or drown and respawned (washed up ashore) on the nearest port.

Even then, why would you waste your free trial for Sea of Thieves when State of Decay 2 is less than 2 months away? Even getting it for free is a rip-off since even free-to-play games have more content than Sea of Thieves.

Probably the only interesting strategies in this broken game I've seen on stream is that you can use those explosive barrels as underwater mines. Carry an explosive barrel underwater to an enemy ship attacking you. Release it under their ship and let it hit the ship or shoot it and let it make 5-6 holes on that ship. They'll be too busy patching up holes to prevent their ship from sinking to even attack you and you can finish them off. Also, that charge sword attack can apparently make you glide far on the edge of the water or when you jump off the ship into the water. I forget which one or if both are possible. Other than that, it is really an overprices fetch quest game for cosmetics you're barely going to even see and don't provide any strategic or upgrade value. The only streams I see that are overly active seems to be from foreign streamers. I think the game is dead in the water.

Blonte.

I know that which is why I said what I did

There's even a save state option that lets you select the exact moment you want to reload. If I was that bad at my job, I'd be fired.

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If you want a semi-realistic boat fighting and on-foot adventuring and full of bugs most of the time
If you want strategy/happy merchant simulator
If you want a quick arcade game
If you want a pirate jrpg
If you just like the pirate setting

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The galleons even have a plank but there's no mechanic to make someone walk it and you'll never be able to park the thing accurately enough for the plank to actually line up with a dock.

what bullshit.

I don't think the first uncharted waters came out in the west, so I guess they didn't want to scare away potential customers who don't want to play a game's sequel without first playing the previous ones

yeah, that is why Games for windows live was a huge success.

The worst part about all this is that Rare's games all have untapped potential. A fully fleshed out pirate simulator could be great for all sorts of reasons as mentioned above, and also, the sports games in Kinect Sports Rivals look like they'd be pretty great games if you could play them with a normal fucking controller. I'd love a new waverace game that plays like vid related.

Not trying to play devil's advocate but there is drinking in the game.

would racemix with the chink

How?

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There are 3 Sea Dogs games on Steam. Sea Dogs, Carribean Tales and To Each His Own. Are they all good?

Love me some queenie.. Is there a higher res version of this?

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I think he meant in game gambling, like in New Vegas.

if there is I don't have it. I only have 2 copies of that small image for some reason.

Still though the Dark queen needs more love.

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Something for nothing clearly refers to redistribution of wealth aka welfare. I think the image is pretty obviously anti-commie.

Playing with a gamepad is the only explanation.

It's just as pointless as everything else, and the worst drunkenness mechanic I've ever seen. Your character actually moves around even if you're not pressing any buttons, so if you're drunk on a dock you can fall off it by not touching your controller. And you get drunk after one mug of grog. And being drunk serves absolutely no purpose, I thought maybe it would cure snake poison or something (another pointless mechanic) but it doesn't make poison go away any faster (it just goes away by itself after a bit). Nothing makes sense.

Depends if you can put up with subpar tutorial, and some bugs. Never played the first Sea Dogs or Carribean tales, but they all play pretty much the same. Age of pirates and pirate of the carribean by the same developpers are in the same vein, that's why I didn't put them as seperates games in my post but as alternatives. By the way, if I remember correctly, that pirate of the carribean was supposed to be a Sea dogs game but with supernatural shit added

They're sandbox pirates games with actual shit to do, it always makes me laugh of those defending sea of thieves with their buyer's remorse are using the argument that it's an original game
It's motherfucking gun of icarus clone with boats and a empty maps with repetitive fetch quests

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cursed land luvers!

Could be interpreted that way, or as people talking about the rich siphoning off the wealth from the working class and poor class.

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Think the chubby that's holding her dogfu lets him mount her? She looks like the type that'd be into that.

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“Working class” is a marxist term implying that business owners don’t work. “Poor class” isn’t a term. Anyway, the game is utter shit.

>>>/zoo/
>>>/furry/

Okay I'm no communist but for fucking real? Business owners don't work. The occasional good person who owns a small business does. Most just collect the profits and determine how hard they want to fuck over their low-level employees this year.

yeah right

Will pirate all of them right now.

Stop playing kusoge, Yuuko-san.

You are completely ignorant of how large corporations function. The more you're paid, the less work you do, but the more crucial your decisions are, on a proportional scale. The highest person in a corporation makes a handful of decisions a year, but they make or break the company. Regardless of the importance of those decisions, I don't think putting in a few days of genuine mental labor out of 365 days counts as work. The most they have to do is be a face that talks to stockholders and reassures them they'll get their money, or be the final say in arguments they weren't involved in from the start.

I don't do it. I said it looks like it's right up her alley, if you know what I mean.

Large business owners often do jack shit. What're you smoking?

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Is he playing that with a fucking controller?

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t. poorfag
Its alright man, we all know you struggle with business concepts otherwise why else would you poor.

...

Maybe cause the upper classes robbed us of our wealth? But no, that can't be it. The rich jews always have our best interests in mind.

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Pirates aren't thieves though.

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More like made wealth itself meaningless by turning all money into meme paper backed by speculating pedophiles who only give out interest free loans to other pedophiles.

...

He's cute yes but he'll also give you HIV.

Majority of business owners are the middle class, you are a retarded faggot who struggles with the concepts of capitalism.

This nigger has a much better understanding, value is no longer on the actual its based on the speculative, leading to bubbles and things being inflated value.
Like twitter having its stock value cut in half because stock analysts THOUGHT it could produce more a profit.

A gamepad might be a shitty way to play an fps, but it's no excuse for being this shit at videogames.
Go ahead and try, I guarantee you would not be this bad even if you tried.
This guy isn't just shit at games, he's on a completely different level.
This this guy is so bad that it totally transcends input devices.
You could fucking jack this guy's nervous system directly into the fucking game, and he'd still fuck it up.
There is no hope for this man.

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If you discredit currency by overprinting and manipulating monetary value, you are robbing from others. By virtue of creating more currency for yourself you are devaluing all those other bills which when received were worth more before you added more money into the market.

This is neither here nor there though, as business owners rarely work or are the "middle class", you imp.

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Duke even has autoaim in by default so a mouse isn't even that necessary. I remember beating the game on a friend's 360 simply for the icon and it wasn't any harder than the PC original.

I wasn't disagreeing with you.

Sorry, forgot I linked you when I responded to that other one.

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And reported.

Just shut the fuck up, you blithering idiot.

Even that would fail, remember Yooka Laylee

This is how mentally defective communists actually are. This is what they actually believe.

So tell me all about the hard work those people at Microsoft did, that goes into a game like Sea of Thieves.

How? Why?

It's kinda true, yeah, they appear not to know how does a pad functions, moving OR aiming and the like. It makes me wonder why they're doing it, kikes have plenty of media to infest. Why does he do something he doesn't even enjoy? Or are there people who are so horrifically bad that they can't get good even at fucking aiming?

""""""""""""""""Rare""""""""""""""""

I have a hard time believing anyone important who worked on those games worked on that. For fucks sake they didn't even get the clothed animal part of the main characters right.
Just all over the place and reeks of leftover ideas pushed into a mold like a sausage patty.

Capitalist reminds me why I hate him as much as the Communist.

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What talent is left?
Do even 20% of the old devs still work there anymore?

Reminder they stole the snake in pants design from Anton & Coolpecker and still managed to fuck that up.

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does the game have sexy white waman?

It has La Creatura

If you have capital and you're working hard, you're doing it wrong.

no sexy waman, no buy!
I consider myself as a part of the 'I_Like_sexy_Waman' minority and from what appears to me, it seems there is no appealing to every minority including mine.
I ask, how can a game with the focus to appeal to more minoroties fail to appeal to mine minority? A game that wanted to be liked by many people, players and gamers couldn't deliver it promis. I am very sad to hear the failed delivery to every minority!

user I NEED TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING

So that's where he's from, I've seen random porn of him on Pixiv for awhile.

Goblin Slayer

He slays goblins

isnt this the same situation as that space game? where angryjoe sperged out

Is this what you are really bitching about? You do understand that printing money is important for paper currency?
That currency is backed by oil reserves and our countries economic strength.

And yes most middle class are owners of franchise stores, gas station, car washes etc.
You are abysmally ignorant of even the most basic economic knowledge.

Wait, is this a piracy game where you can't rob things from towns, villages, and NPCs?

The problem is that they either didn't do their fucking job, or they consciously made piss poor decisions about what the devs should put in the game. I'll agree with you that CEOs and the like make way too much money for the work they put in, but to say that they hardly work is false. The world would be less of a shitty place if large corporations gave the people at the bottom a larger piece of the pie. Not to say that those in a leadership position don't deserve to be paid more, but it would be nice if the menial workers saw the success of their company reflected in their own paycheck.

...

Remember when rare used to put sexy ladies in their games regardless of if they made sense or not, or even if they were appropriate to be there in the first place?

But what about the protestant ethic and the spirit of capitalism? They worked hard as fuck and were still capitalists. Very good ones in fact.

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Is it wrong to think she'd be mildly attractive if her (((nose))) wasn't so prominent?
Looking at her again she looks like a goblin with a wig on. What am I thinking?

No no no, user. You can't have a game where people do things such as robbing, that might trigger someone. Instead in this game you look for buried treasure and fight skeletons. Because that's all pirates did! They were nice treasure hunters who engaged in a bit of friendly competition sometimes.

Honestly I don't even know why it's pirate themed. You don't engage in piracy most of the time anyway. Might as well have called it "Sea of Tomb Raiders" but that might make people think of a better game.
who am I kidding none of these people played the good Tomb Raiders

UNC UNC UNC UNC UNC UNC UNC UNC

I've never even played Duke 3D and I can tell he's bad at it.
That one part near the beginning where he keeps trying to kick that alien but misses and walks off hurts my soul.

They can't do that, in free market capitalism they would get out competed by those that treat the replaceable lowly scum worse. It's a race to the bottom if you are unfortunate to have to sell your labour instead of doing nothing and get capital gains for it.

Is he playing with fucking keyboard controls or what? This reminds me of when I tried to play Doom without mouselook, but I believe Duke 3D already had that to some degree, right?

It has mouselook but only fore horizontal by default. Not sure about the rereleases.

But sexy ladies always make sense.

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So you're telling me this dude just walks up to enemies and starts wobbling his hand around?

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He uses his feet sometimes too.

Nice dreamworks face there

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This is worse than the PS2.

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I can't unsee Shigeru Miyamoto's goofy smile on the Asian broad even though she isn't even the same ethnicity.

God damn, I want to claw my eyes out. He has steroids selected the whole time, which is the Duke3D version of the berserk pack from Doom. Makes your mighty boot insta-kill most enemies and makes you run really fast. Even though he has no pistol ammo he has no excuse for playing this badly. At least he realized he should blow up the trashcan to look for a medkit.

It doesn't need vert mouselook. Duke3D had vertical autoaiming just like Doom.

What version is this? I have never seen this "rewind slider" before and Duke's pain voice cues sound even faggier compared to the original recording.

Jesus Christ I'm not sure if I even want to know.
You said it Duke.

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I think it's the Gearbox "remaster", whatever retarded name they gave it.

HOLY FUCK FUCKING DEJA VU, I SAW THESE EXACT SAME POSTS IN A THREAD LAST YEAR BEFORE CHRISTMAS

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That would explain how they got the voice talent for it. I like St. John's voice but his original takes sounded better.

>Yet threads just (((happen))) to appear about it on Holla Forums

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Nothing to get angry about here, just having a swell time and enjoying the smug due to schadenfreude.

Fun would be justified if there was anything to make fun of in this game. There isn't. It's the 53456th iteration of Twitchbait vaguely feminist bullshit game.

Anger would be justified if the game had any impact whatsoever. It hadn't, because of the reason above.
Ergo, any attempt to "talk" about this game is very likely an attempt at garnering undue attention.

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This game has been hyped in every E3 since 2015. Microsoft put it on the front page for their Xbox site (or so I've heard). This game was hyped to hell and back, just as much as Skyrim or Oblivion and it's even more of a letdown than either of those games, which is saying something. The amusement comes from the fact that Microsoft seemed to think this would be their killer app for their worthless console which has surpassed launch PS3 as a nogaems meme and it has as much content as an alpha playtest.

I don't know about you but seeing shitty games fail brings me a small measure of joy. It also lets me know that this industry isn't completely fucked yet.

Whatever nigger, I'm gonna enjoy this overhyped project flopping and laughing at yet another failure of Microsoft's. I consider it's failure a win, winning never gets old.

Just mark my words and watch out for more threads like this just seemingly appearing out of nowhere in a few weeks, when everybody forgot about Sea of Thieves.

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I've given hope for Rare long ago. Their only value is in their IPs.

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given up hope**

Heh. It's that space game all over again. I forgot the name, it was made by those beardy, open mouthed nu-devs. But it's actually that.
it's actually that space game all over again.

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I'd be happy if the game came to windows 7,and on steam,and was free,it'd make for a neat game night.
Won't touch it unless those happen though.

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heh

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i was in the midst of writing this comment, then i noticed yours. well put.

i usually forget the names of vaporware-type software

lul

It looks like Tumblr made a pirate level for Timesplitters 2.

I still do not understand how they could possibly manage to fuck up a pirate game. It's not like they were reinventing the wheel here, they should have just copied AssCreed 4 and made it multiplayer.

thieves indeed

Look at the photo in this post
Every developer working on this is the same kind of hipster who sees an episode of Mythbusters and thinks their a scientist. They live and breath vicariously through fads.

HIV doesn't exist in animeland, because niggers people don't exist in animeland.
And nigger traps don't exist period.

Thieves indeed, the devs just commited highway robbery of selling a barebones-game they were probably finished with 3 years ago for full price.

Fuck me. Goddamn.

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Yes they do, but tyrone and co. fall for it and put the poor thing out of its misery when they notice the penis.

You are very, very wrong. I would actually say they're more common than white traps. White traps just use the internet more, and are more in demand than the nig transvestite.

Looks like the Xbox 360 version to me.

If you look at the rewind menu during the numerous times he died one of the button prompts is the square button on a DualShock. Maybe the same version was released on multiple platforms.

The original 360 release didn't have that.

Well, build version yeah, not necessarily platform. Didn't notice the DS face button prompts because I wasn't paying that close of attention to it. I just remember that rewind shit from the 360 version.

Perfect Dark can't be duplicated. It exists only as a sequel to GE in the way it's an upgrade to every single concept GE did before it. GE only succeeded because it was built by a group who went into it wanting to reimagine an FPS game (none of the original GE devs had played a FPS, hence why everything is completely different to the PC games).
If Rare somehow got a team together that had ideas to redo FPS games from it's basics, MS wouldn't fund that because it's too risky.

How to get some value out of Rare.

1. Fire everyone
2. Sell licences for IPs to small dev groups for them to make small XBL Arcade games (Battletoads as a beat em up, Banjo as a 2D platformer (ie. "Who wants to try and improve on that new DKC N is doing"?). Charge 15 bucks each with the aim at building trust in the brand/IPs again.
3. Get the shattered remains of Free Radical and get them to do a small follow up to PD to get people interested.
4. Fund FR to make a crazy new FPS that looks just like Timesplitters but completely different because it has a different name. Keep them making crazy multiplayer/couch-coop shooters forever.
5. At the end of the console generation, make compilation disks of these games. Sell on both the current gen and have as a bundle-title for the new console gen (with a bit of HD remix-ing to get the early adopters going "Wow, isn't this cool!").

Fire all of these women, and hire a man who knows how to design a good quest narrative and item progression. Boom, game becomes 20 times more appealing. Equality (in general) is the death of all that is fun. Libshit yuppies know nothing of how to make co-op, exploration gameplay "fun".

Jesus Christ man. These people just don't have any respect, at all. They need to be driven out of the industry, zero fucking tolerance. Goes to show they really don't play nor care about video games.

Was there any other pirate game on the SNES other than Uncharted Waters 1 and 2? I have a very faint memory of playing a sort of pirate/sailing/swashbuckling game on a SNES emulator as a kid, but I'm not quite sure that UW is it.

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It's pretty hard to tell. Most negresses look like men, so a trap is a little unfair a term.

What do we call the disgusting artstyle this game and other garbage like overwatch, generic chinese mobileshit and league of legends have?
That weird, puke inducing shiny clay?
It needs a name.

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That's because a computer is too complex to operate for the average nigger, even more so one with at least 4 different STDs and a brain fried from taking artificial hormones.

Pixar

Sculpted ugliness.
Clay Fighter ripoffs.
Plasticine chic.

That's a really good edit.

Probably be a good idea to conquer her extra chromosome first, kek.

Fight ya m8, swear on me ancestors.

Also, giving the devil his due, AssCreed: Black Flag was pretty clutch.

What do you do with a drunken sailor…