HEY ALAN GET OUT OF MY HOUSE LOL

HEY ALAN GET OUT OF MY HOUSE LOL

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I can't sit like Charlie does, my balls hurt too much. He either has no dick n balls or has mastered the eastern art of sucking your dick into your gut.

You tilt your hips out and slouch down low. Then your cock and balls lay across the thigh of the leg that has it's foot on the ground. You hook your other leg over your knee and badaboom. It's not comfortable, your lower back hurts after awhile, but your balls aren't crushed.

I just tried it and it works, at least I'm not completely crushing my balls now, it needs some practice but thank you for the technique advice.

No worries chum. I used to own Adirondack chairs and it's the most comfortable way to sit in them. Normal chairs not so much, they lack the lumbar support.

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Its the AIDS that allows him to do that

Yeah well he isn't 300lbs like you.

I'm only 260

I'm 160 lbs, i have large balls and a slightly above average cock, so putting legs together tight like that will crush them. It's simple physics, two objects cannot occupy the same space at the same time.
bazinga

I can sit like that no problem with no adjustments, but I have feminine cock and balls.

Do you resemble pics related perchance?

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Nope. Soyboys tend to have monster cocks because they are subhuman animals.

That doesn't make sense, soyboys have baby dicks on account of the soy and zero testosterone. They are devoid of bollocks, ironically though whenever they open their mouths they are full of bollocks.

True

I was a dyed in the wool drumpfkin, which meant I was fat, nerdy, and had a tiny cock. I got AIDS from paying a cheap whore to fuck me, since I have no love in my life.
When the doctor told me, he recommended the only thing he knew would work – Hildawg.

I slammed my penis between two copies of What Happened. It swelled up to twice normal size and fell off. I was worried.

I woke up the next day with incredible abs, a 14" rod of steel, and no HIV. Now I run a successful video game review and political commentary channel on youtube, banging my 10/10 journalist wife(her femine penis is bigger than mine, shit is so cash), and most importantly I'm With Her.

Thank you, Hillary Clinton!

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Well my nuts are the size of peanuts and I' m no soyboy.

Gee, it's almost like the entire point of the aut-white is to project their own failing onto others to protect their fragile male egos…

Alan btfo

Wew

I used to make posts explaining basic shit ironically. Then I realized there are people that are just dumb as fuck in this world.

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They're called idiot savants, people who are advanced in very specific subjects like higher mathematics, but can't function at all when it comes to standard/ basic functions like how to wipe your ass correctly.

Wait, there is a correct way to wipe your ass?

Also he demonstrated no particular skill or adeptness. to simply assume he is a savant and not simply an idiot is rather optimistic. I think you are giving him far too much credit.

Yes, you have to put one foot on the sink.

You have to wipe a couple of times while sitting/ squatting to removed the large amount of poo from the anal doorwar, then you stand slightly squatting with one foot raised about a foot high ideally resting on an object of that height, which allows full entry to clean your bumhole and the surrounded area of all particulates of poo.

You use a bidet and then have your gf perform analingus.

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It also looks really gay. I used to bully boys who sat like that in middle school.

What kind of games do you review? What did you think of Kingdom Come: Deliverance? Post some of your videos.

Yeah, but those people aren't here. Only smart people use image boards, Holla Forums especially.

Kingdom come deliverance, delivers (pardon the pun) on the promises of being an authentic medieval simulator in Bohemia, living the life of a peasant, the son of a Blacksmith. You progress through the game in natural fashion, unlike other rpg systems the way you rank up your skills is dependent on using a particular method. For example if you want to get better at using a bow then you have to practice, you can enter tournaments or you can go hunting in the realistically fashioned forests for game.

I will finish off this short albiet concise review by saying the game is priced fairly considering the amount of hours of entertainment you can release from it, my play time is over 100 hours having completed the main quest line although I skipped a lot of side quests in order to do so.
The tagline of Bethesda games is "live another life" however in KCD you truly can live another life, being fully immersed in a historically accurate game, the care and attentiveness the developers poured into is palpable in every quest line, town, village, character and item.

This game is a must purchase for any lover of RPG's.

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Post em.

was Alan the original soyboy?