Give me a game featuring Wizard lizards

Personally I blame the patriarchy

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Are you the lizard?

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Well, the lack thereof, at any rate. It's the same as the US: traditional values replaced with progressive values = birth rate plummets and suicide rate spikes.

Age of Wonders 1.

You can even play the campaign as a lizard.

Binding of Isaac is shit.

japanese no longer have samurai fights, sumo wrestling is pretty much arranged like wrestling, and well, fucking anime. their women are probably as trashy as western ones but uglier.

Shit you got me man.

You're shit.

what year did they made pedosexuality illegal? im willing to bet it was close or at the same point in time as the red line

Nigga you dumb, it's been legal, this whole time people have been trying to illegalize it. The consenting age is like 13.

i just want to watch this retarded world burn at this point

Also, you fucking well know the major reason for that drop: anime and the NEET lifestyle. The very same reason why half of the people here are still almost 30 virgins.

nah, you're full of shit. I'm willing to bet the NEET/hikki population is extremely small. The real reason is because both men and women are expected to work themselves to death, and having a child means giving up on climbing the corporate ladder.

Any games with cool lizard NPC's?

Besides the obvious Elder scrolls games, there's Wizardry 6-8. Their stats are more geared toward being a fighter, but I'm willing to bet you can make it work with enough patience. There's also Dungeon Lords and Legend of Grimrock.

A cute and simple game with a nice soundtrack. Thanks Satan.

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10/10 post

TES, obviously. Pretty decent lizards, too. Certainly in morrowind.

i can imagine murricans replacing the weeb girl for Terry Crews

that poor tegu

I want a version of that with Velma. I want her to beg me to spray her stinkies with my jinkies.

oh i'm with you dude. honestly as soon as there's an english-speaking character i'm going to get one

theyre weird creatures, i dont think id want to meet an NPC one

What else is there for an animal?
We're not talking something smart, like a bird. Even then, they spend a lot of time doing stupid shit. Crows sliding down roofs is a good example, or cockatoos shouting into cups.

I hope it comes with a fleshlight attachment, or a hdmi cable so I can attached it to a tv and put the fleshlight under that.

Day of Waifu soon.

birds in general are pretty fucking stupid

Fuck you, mate, crows are straight up the smartest animal in the world if you don't count humans.

i like snakes because they dont shit on my floor and make good necklaces
also i can hoard them and no one will know

If they're so smart then how come they're black?

Snakes are some pretty awesome little fellows, yeah. Surprisingly gentle, if a tad dull. Holding one is very relaxing

Because outside snow, being white gets you ate by bigger birds and other land animals, duh.

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Isn't there literally a game called "A Wizard's Lizard" and you become a magical lizard?

Go wear nothing but white in the wild while being a good chunk smaller than most predatory animals. See how long you last. Meanwhile, the crow'll be safe, hidden away in some tree, dropping nuts in traffic to crack 'em.

out of all the pets ive ever owned, snakes are hand down my favorite.

ive had more animals in my life but these were/are pretty much my main ones.
GOOD TIER:
Snakes, Dogs
OK tier:
Lizards, some fish
BAD tier:
everything else

also vidya wise you aren't a wizard but there's an mobile game called run lizard which is pretty ok to kill 5-10 minutes every day

skinks not skins*

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Every pet lizard I have seen looks eternally grumpy. Only exceptions are very small, soft lizards, but they're not really big enough to keep as pets.
The larger the lizard, the more grumpy and otherwise displeased it seems.

Leopard and crested geckos have endearing faces but they are small. I personally find water monitors faces to be cute but I currently have no room for one unfortunately.
Frilled lizards look like mean little bastards but I'd love one of those one day as well. Beardeds can be silly but they're mostly just sassy fucks

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Space Station 13. You can be a lizard person AND if you get lucky, a wizard too.

Bump.

Corvids are fairly smart.

you know how I can tell it's a reddit screencap?

Iguanas are nice. I had a few that were three feet long, they're friendly and like going on short walks on the lizard leash. Also got along well with my dog.

Stone soup I guess

There is heaps of vids on youtube of those birds bullying cats, in this one it looks like the bird makes 2 cats fight for its entertainment.

Cats are so fucking dense.

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Soon, user. Jealous fatties can't stop it, only delay it slightly.

>they fall off the roof

Do crows know how to effectively camouflage?

Why live.

That's the national aoc. Virtually all of the local aoc are higher now.

topbantz

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because it takes one to know one?

Vultures are cool, but what is this trash screencap?

is he blowing a fagot?

Dunno. Have some bird.

you can go back now

who are you quoting?

i am quoting your course of actions

Greentext is not for straight quoting, necessarily. The " mark is for that.
Greentext is able to take vague or otherwise implied items, rather than a strict quotation.
This is something you'll learn if you lurk more, you disgusting newfag

so why did you spoonfeed him idiot

You can't teach cancer by telling it to leave, user.
Berate, insult, but educate. That's my thinking.

sup

thread theme

Orangutans are smarter than your silly little crows.

I was actually coming to post that. Pretty good for a bunch of insane fucking aussies.

Go to bed, Nue

I'm not convinced.

You better be.
If animals are ever recognized as "persons" by governments, Orangutans are probably going to be among the first.

Niggers are recognized as people by governments already

Orangutans are far more civil and congenial than niggers.

Until they get mad and rip a guys face off or something.

Crows ought be first, I say

what the fuck

The only reason Orangutans would get angry with you is if you intentionally pissed them off.
Niggers get angry at the drop of a hat.

Not denying the intelligence of Corvids in general, but I say our primate cousins should get the first opportunity.

Yea but a nigger won't rip your fucking face off.

Nope, but they will steal your possessions, try to fuck your women, ruin every community they join, and have next to no benefit to society.
Orangutans are the better alternative.

You're missing the point.

Because madmen gave them guns

No, I'm not.

Generally niggers fucking suck. But they don't go primal and tear things apart limb from limb without giving a fuck. Not gonna really argue this any further. All memes aside I'm just saying even if you're black you're still further along the evolutionary track than an ape.

Also in spirit of not completely making offtopic shitposts there is legend of grimrock 1 and 2. Was mentioned earlier in the thread but these two are some of my favorite games from the past few years. You can even make your entire party wizard lizards

I don't know, man.
Living next to an Orangutan would be exciting.

I prefer not to live near anything that can shoot or rip me apart me for being superior to them.

See, that's the benefit of Orangutans. They don't care if you are.

Yea they'll just fuck your shit up for some reason some day because you did something they didn't like that you weren't aware of. Don't pretend their not capable of fucking your shit up for no reason. It happens to trainers all the time.

Ah, but there's a simple solution.
Get a Gorilla bodyguard.

Since gorillas can learn sign language can you also teach them to shoot guns?

I'de rather depend on a dog than a primate for protection tbh.

I dont think a dog is going to win a fight with an orangutan

Potentially, but we should ensure a few things:
1) The Gorilla(s) in question should be either trained in such a way as to be absolutely loyal to handler or genetically enhanced to do so.
2) Ensure their handler and those they guard can understand sign language. If not, perhaps we can develop a sign language-to-audio translator.
3) Start testing with small-grade firearms, adapting as the situation demands.

The wars of the future will be fought with Primate Commandos.

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I don't think I'm going to encounter an orangutan in central America. And a dog can just outrun one anyway.

If I knew they wouldn't tear my arms off for no reason I'de get one.

But if the dog just runs away who will protect you?

on the ground, in a park or forest you would be fucked

Not of that there primate has firearms training.

I'd rather not live next door to such a dangerous creature. I'll stick to my crows. Nice, peaceable birds, so long as you are nice to them. If you are nice to a crow, you'll have all crows in the area know you as a cool dude.

If you need protection why the fuck would you go into a forest?

To bring the fight to them and end the conflict once and for all

Because I want to go for a walk in a forest?
What, should I not go where I please just because some orange apes might attack?

If life were a cheesy action movie this would be correct.

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That should be renamed to either
or

and this is why spiders are superior to both lizards and birds

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Suck my cloaca, spiderfag

please, it is time for magic not bickering.