ITT: Explain a vidya plot poorly

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A private military company leads a series of operations across two continents until they

Windows 10

shit, should've been vaguer

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I got nothing.

It's too late Suz, I'm already a Demon.

An elderly man was sitting alone on a dark path, right? He wasn't certain of which direction to go, and he'd forgotten both where he was traveling to and who he was. He'd sat down for a moment to rest his weary legs, and suddenly looked up to see an elderly woman before him. She grinned toothlessly and with a cackle, spoke: 'Now your third wish. What will it be?'
'Third wish?' The man was baffled. 'How can it be a third wish if I haven't had a first and second wish?'
'You've had two wishes already,' the hag said, 'but your second wish was for me to return everything to the way it was before you had made your first wish. That's why you remember nothing; because everything is the way it was before you made any wishes.' She cackled at the poor berk. 'So it is that you have one wish left.'
'All right,' said the man, 'I don't believe this, but there's no harm in wishing. I wish to know who I am.'
'Funny,' said the old woman as she granted his wish and disappeared forever. 'That was your first wish.'

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You find a button to push most of the time but other times you have to win a fight.

You scan a thing then defend it for a few minutes

updated my berk

undertale

...

...

...

sounds like the entire Far Cry series except maybe 2. I forget what that one's about.

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Metroid Prime

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correct, its Far Cry 3

Postal 2

Right.

Now for the online.

Stupid bitch of a friend hangs out with astronauts while you go wrestling.

your execution went terribly wrong and you have to suffer for dozens of hours to fulfill the prophecy

Zero Escape

Thousand Year Door

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Skyrim?

Seconding Skyrimjob

yeah

cops take a nap in a tub and has lots of spooky nightmare dreams

This is a hard one:

Easy, Dragon's Dogma

Fuck.

ser, please

Yes

Resident Evil 4 The Evil Within

Fable 3
I wish that game was good.

Dragon's Dogma?

Well it only happens if you play offline, but I play offline too

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The Evil Within.

Dragon's Dogma.

Oh I did it wrong.

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Yes.

good job
now wash behind your ears sebastian you smell like ass

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D4

Okay, now this one is hard for real:

metal gear rising

...

Nope.

Bloodbath Kavkaz?

MGS2

Nope.

Bullshit, that is MGS2's plot

That too

Nope.

Metal Slug?

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You only had to pursue the damn locomotive: Saint Lucas

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This could also be Silent Hill Homecoming.

Nice try, but nope.

Returned to My Place of Residency

…Half-Life 2?

No.

1. you drive a truck with a nuclear warhead to the mountain base

2. bunch of alcoholics, kleptomaniacs and other mentally unstable people die underground

right. but I had Skyrim in mind.

Metro 2033/ Last Light?

technically it counts. I fucked up number 2

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Too fucking easy. MGS2

These are all separate.
>shoot shit with your buddy.

COD: MW2

A Russian with a very bad hangover decides to be badass but finds out he was always badass.

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You're released from your jail and walk out of the prison while killing everyone you meet.

Also works with Shadow of Mordor

S.T.A.L.K.E.R.?

zombieu

Silent hill 1?

no, but that would fit too.
If you need a hint:It's way more actiony

I think ours are the same.

F.E.A.R.?

Ok guys, guess these

no1

no2

no3

no4

yes.

That hurt more than it should have.

2 is Bastion

1 is bioshit infishit.

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soma.

I don't get it.. MGSV, or Peace Walker

both correct

Mgs2 comes off more retarded to me now.

Gone homo
Ace Combat Zero
Both Metro 20xx games

This guy has absolutely no luck with the ladies until one day when he discovers he has the magic touch. He thinks he's finally got things figured out, but then he meets a bunch of very special high school kids, and his life will never be the same again!

last two correct.

Fallout NV for the third.

It always made me think of George Bush attacking an oil rig and during the fight with Raiden he'd say "watch this drive "before swinging his sword.

yep

The World Ends With You

A mute goes on a workplace rampage following a change in leadership.

In the middle of a massive war in Bumfuck, Middle East, two old dudes fight constantly, one of them hacks all the guns, and then they find out it's because they're gay for each other.

Half Life

MGS4

MGS4

Thats funny but thats also sad

You go into the city and you're stuck there, but it turns out you were supposed to be stuck and you're the bad guy there but then you beat up the guy who put you there and then you become a father.

Then in the next game you're another dad, and you want to leave for some reason even though you live there so you shoot everyone, get your daughter and leave.

In the third game you gotta get your daughter who's in the sky, but you don't know it's your daughter and you do it a bunch of times until it works and then the ending's bad but because the writers don't understand it that means its mind blowing.

some guy who hid cigs in his stomach has to find two old farts and a autistic neet who tells you about his animus and helps you fight his weeb weapon's project.

Yakuza

Mega Geared Sonic

Fuck you. I came to this thread to have fun, not feel.

you do whatever you want around the globe until you choose whether to destroy technology somehow, become part of a hidden governing body, or become god.

MGS1
too ez

You're pretty good.

Dragon Ball

I'm going with SMT: Strange Journey

Deus Ex.

a cosplay dude drives to places in his car and then leaves these places. He also talks to people in different places too and also leaves them

Age of Empires

Hotline Miami

You play a cute grill studying the magic power of a puzzle game

no

its a much less known game, more recent and keyword : uplay

fits too but think more western and a little bit old.
Hint if you need it:They made a f2p mmo out of it.

*[character name] looks like they have something to say* for the first 5 hours of the game, then things get interesting.

Grown Ups 2

Teenager escapes supposedly unbreakable prison 2 times and goes in a search for magical crystals with his 2 girlfriends.

well done, that made me laugh and cry.

I'll take "Any SMT: Persona game" for 500, Alex

Receiver

Nope, sorry, oni-fam.

I'm nuclear, i'm wild. I'm breaking up inside.

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(checked)
Yes.

You enter the writer/dev's Magical Realm.

SMT: Nocturne
Terranigma?

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Corruption of Champions?
Wait, no. That's your magical realm, not the dev's.

No. It's much more cheerful and lighthearted.
Hint:Nintendo exclusive and features class change mechanics like ffxiv.
No. It's more modern and had no strict classbased trees.
Hint:It feels very much like a single player mmo.

nope not even close

A cult leader orders a cultist to kill some guys so he could become the leader of a bigger cult. The cultist decides he can be a better cult leader and kills him too.

Spot on.

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A spy infiltrates a secret base to kill a guy pretending to be his dad.

Pony Island.

MGS2?

Metal Gear 1

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A man with an obvious tattoo, a signature suit and his personal logo branded on most of his posessions somehow is not recognised as a world famous legendary killer.

No, Raiden was literally some Scandinavian or whatever child soldier who actually got brought up by Solidus, so that dude is ACTUALLY his dad.

MGSV retconned the boss in the original Metal Gear to be your player character.

That sounds like the most amazing reverse-MGR ever.

Too bad I have no idea which game that is.

Every JRPG.

Raiden is a white South African

i never played it but will guess that is bravely default
Xenoblade?

Hitman?

Elder Scrolls?

The amnesiac protagonist has to be evil, but no matter what he does he can't become worse than the good guys.

You need to either nuke your son or not nuke your son. He dies anyway so it doesn't even matter.

communism, gypsies, drugs and fighting

In the world of people who can't look up a man becomes king.

Mother Russia Bleeds.

action movie stars kill satan

yep, that was too easy

Black and White?

A bunch of mercenaries yell at each other about money, while they do a job.

It's killer7
Debatable as to whether they're actually terrorists though

Fallout 4

You're framed for murdering someone you were supposed to protect. Aided by a supernatural being that gives you dark powers, you get revenge though stealth or more murder.

no for both.
And bravely default isn't lighthearted at all.
Giga hint for the first one: it's made by level5 and has an android sequel but only in japan.
hint for second: made by western devs, has character creation, has cards as "classes" you can get by getting x amount of points into it's respective tree. It's "writing" was considered a selling point and it was originally meant to be an actual mmo.

No, the mmo started as f2p, not became one.
hint:it was a priced title with single and multi, but there was legal fuckery with it's servers so it shut down. Years later it resurfaced as an f2p mmo with added content.
Another one that will probably give it away:It's like a third person/first person diablo in the future.

Disheveled

A bunch of nuggets turn out to be the manifestation of a demon-hero and work together to prevent a nuclear holocaust.

Payday 1/2. Although they do a lot more yelling about the thermal drill.

Chroma Squad?

...

nope

Gotta be Broforce, then.

i will never guess the Nintendo exclusive but the second one is that piece of shit Kingdoms of Amalur right?

Except it is, you fucker. Raiden is being manipulated the entire time by The Patriots in order to enact their S3 plan. Solidus wants to liberate the United States from their control, but you're ordered by them to stop him.

I don't care what game you're talking about, but "evil guy did nothing wrong, good guy is following evil guy's plan all along" is literally MGS2's plot.

And don't give me fucking semantics shit either, with "oh, but evil guy means the same person from the first quote"

Yup.

Gotta be.

Correct

Given the shit they pull, they fit the "picks targets specifically to scare the shit out of everyone" definition. The Killer Smiles are pretty goddamn scary if you think about it–invisible, murder-obsessed, and nigh-impossible to kill. That, and some of the things the villains start doing, is probably enough to put any country into full panic mode.
That having been said, who decides what a terrorist is? Just as you have to ask "quis custodes ipsos custodiet", you must also ask "et custodes, quis vult"–Who watches the watchmen, and who chooses them?

Dante is featured.

from dust

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hard mode:

Dante Must Die Mode:

No, I mean there's some hints that they are randoms emir is mowing down over the course of performing the series of assassinations because he's a fucking schizo
It's been a long time though, I'd have to read up or play through again to get too much more into detail.

Try again.

undertale

Spyro

none of those games are undertale

correct

>kid goes into the basement, learns he is the demons, kills himself. does it all over again and again and again

its devil may cry 2 you fucking retards

Animal Crossing.

hotline miami

You and your gang of friends try to stop a bunch of anarchists. Aliens from another dimension and family issues are involved.

Binding of Isaac?

Half life 2?

Nope.
Hint: It's part of a long-running series

you argue aimlessly until you blame someone of murder.

Ace attorney Online.

Final Fantasy 9?

yup

Soma.

Nope.
Hint 2: It was made by Nintendo

Nice trips by the way

Talos Principle

Minecraft

Vanquish?

Number 2 could be Dwarf Fortress.

Number 4 is From Dust.

The second to last one here is Hellgate: London.

Life is Strange

High Chaos Dishonored?

Dragon's Dogma?

yes

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>Nice trips by the way
Praise Cid.

nope, it's not Dorf Fort

The only explanation you need is that you are playing a Monster Hunter.

Mother 3?

Earthbound?

Stalker

correct

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Close. Some of the people who worked on earthbound on this series
Last Hint: it was released this year.

Merde

Pokemon S/M

3 is new vegas with mods

E.Y.E.
New Vegas with mods.

RE4.

wait that's french, fuck

Yes.

Silent Hill?

Ace Combat 5 playing it right now actually

Correct.

Yeah.
I'm not being vague enough to make this challenging am I?

Nice user. One of my favorite games right there.

The RE4 one was pretty good. But Silent Hill is kinda easy because there aren't many games that fit that criteria.

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MGQ?

So a prince, a dragon, a child killer and a pedophile walk into a bar…

Drakengard

Yup.

Drakengard

You travel to another land to eat a bunch of beans and murder an old lady.

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Prince of persia the warrior within

metal wolf chaos

Your girlfriend tries to kill you when you're robbing a bank with her because she doesn't like how small-time you are, so you escape the police truck that is bringing you to prison and go on a shootout killing dozens of heavily armed criminals then blow up her helicopter with a rocket launcher you stole
Guess

>Ce sentiment quand les planches à images françaises sont soit mortes soit remplies de normauxpédés.
I feel you.

You got it.

Mario and Luigi Super Star Saga?

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Call of Cthulhu: something Dark Corners?

Yup

Yep. Although instead of "murder" I should have said "stomp on her head repeatedly until she dies".

You tear down the conspiratory stabilishment because conspiracies are bad by conspirating

Nobody answered this one yet.
Too vague I guess.
Large vehicles are involved.

Gone Home for sure

2 is Dankest Dungeon

You have to stop a powerful creature from being released. You fail but you kill it anyway.

Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door?

There are a few games that could fit that bill and I can't remember any of their names.

etrian odessey 2/2 untold?

The answer is every RPG ever

Speaking of RPGs

yup

you cheeky cunt.

Eternal Sonata

rip Chopin

That's Silent Hill 1.

Could be Silent Hill 3 and 4 as well if you're reaching.

No one going to take a stab at any of these? They are all different games.

Yeah.

Condemned.

Two mercenary groups were fighting eachother but then the story shit the bed

No body figured it out yet?

Has to be Kingdoms of Amalur

If it makes you feel any better it's bugging the shit out of me because I recognize the phrasing.
I want to say DA:O or Planescape, but those could easily both be wrong

Overlord?

Ayys invade and must defend the earth with the most diverse team of power rangers the world has ever seen.

I'll wait a little longer before telling you.
Here's a tip: The character who wants to talk to you is a male and is annoying.

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You encounter an ancient robot, find out it is a killing machine, try to use it for good and almost cause the end of the world

This one was fucking easy
Hint: the puzzle game is Dr. Robotnik's Mean Bean machine

All separate

KOTOR 1?

yes

Bloodborne, Virtue's Last Reward, Devil May Cry 4, killer7, don't know what the fifth one is

Yup.

Shadow of the Colossus
Danganronpa
Bayonetta
I dunno the last two

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Goddammnit

HINTS FOR LAST TWO

yes
close
close
nope

I was thrown off because KOTOR 1 does not get interesting after 5 hours, it merely becomes slightly less shit.

nope
yep
yep

Manhunt

If it's not VLR and DMC4 it's Danganronpa and Bayonetta

Oh whoops I didn't even read the rest of your post

TF2, maybe?

Left 4 Dead is the last one

a bunch of hipsters try taking down a caricature of a relevant politician

Yep

Watch Dogs 2

Yeah, that was obviously meant to be an easy one.

You want to save the world, but every single person in that world is a pedophile so it's tough for you.

Okay, so you're in this dude in pajamas and you run around a badly-designed jail because some guy in a funny hat wants your girl and locked you up and there's cherry Kool-Aid lying all over the place so you drink that shit up except for the one place that has blueberry Kool-Aid which sucks and makes you feel queasy and then you run into a fucking skeleton and push it into a hole and run away, wondering how some of the other guys in stupid hats got all over the place and try to find your way out and then you jump through a piece of furniture and then a ghost you runs around and you sometimes see him and he drinks that larger cup of cherry Kool-Aid like a prick and then you see a fat guy and he's real tough and you probably push him into a hole too and then you try to get over a big hole and then that ghost you who stole your drank slams the door in your face and you fall in the hole and then you wander around another and find a super-sized cup of lime Kool-Aid so you grip and sip and feel like you're light as a feather and somehow make it down to the bottom of the hole and then you fuck around and end up in some stupid cage trap like a stupid fucking rat but then an actual rat going for it ends up opening it up because it's an overengineered piece of shit and then you keep fucking around and find another super-sized cup of lime Kool-Aid and hoping to get fuckin' crunk you chug that shit but it's actually apple Kool-Aid and gives you a bad high and you get your stupid ass lost and then you find there's a fucking badly-maintained climbing adventure room in the jail but you climb up anyway and you find that prick who stole your drank and slammed the door in your face and he wants to spook and fight you to the death but you're like nah fuck that and you two become inseperable and he convinces you to walk off a sheer drop but it's not actually a sheer drop at all and then you run around and the whole fucking place must be falling apart because there's crumbling shit dropping everywhere and then you see the guy in the funny hat who stole your girlfriend and you push him down a hole and then you meet up with your girl and that fucking dumb ass rat who let you out of that stupid fucking cage shows up at the end too.

Here's two pretty simple ones:
1. You crawl up your mothers vagina and suffocate after killing her from the inside.
2, You end up killing children, women and the elderly around you all for power and greed. Were you actually the villain all along?

prince of persia

Binding of Isaac?
NieR/Drakengard?

I haven't played any of those three though.

The first one is Firewatch. How did no one get that after so many replies? I haven't even played the game I just had it spoiled and that's all I had to go on.

it was already guessed and it was f.e.a.r.

The first one is correct, the other one isn't.

Goddamn Magnificent.

I'll go:

You have to shove paint down women's throats to open a portal in the sky so you or one of them can escape to paradise

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F.E.A.R

Silent Hill 2 Dog Ending

Hint for #2: It's not an RPG, think bigger.

You spend most of the game beating your girlfriend, cheating on her and getting into fights, but at some point the demons come back to haunt you and she gives you the cold shoulder.

Correct.
I also would have accepted Deadly Premonition

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Time Gal?

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I almost want to say dead rising.

not quite. Hint: the answer is sorta already in the thread

Bioshot: Infinite
Bastion
Fallout: New Vegas
From Dust

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Max Payne?

Yes

...

...

Ya

Spider man for ps1
Alternatively, prince of persia for 360 and ps3

nah

the fog is perpetuated by an evil tree

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Demon's Souls

correct

Right, sorry for being so late

Should be relatively easy.

Game number 1:

Game number 2:

Game number 3:

Game number 4:
The tittymonster dies

Game number 5:

FF15
dunno
Uncharted 4
dunno
Nier

Oh wait 4 is Valkyria Chronicles

purseowner 4

Nope.

You attempt to escape your cycles of guilt

pic related if you can't figure it out

Unreal Tournament.