Paper Mario Color Splash

Even tough it isn't like 64 or TYD, it still looked fun, and better than Sticker Star. At the very least it has pseudo-partners in the form of enemy cards. If you like TYD, than that's great. I don't care enough to get a Gamecube, I'm too retarded to emulate, and I'm to moralfag to pirate. I love Paper Mario 64, and if I ever want to play it again, I can just boot it up on Virtual Console.

It still has the same flawed boom-bust cycle Sticker Star had.

You still pick up attacks from the world instead of building up a character, you still have coins as your sole resource (aside from the titular paint), you still don't gain EXP, there's still no badge system, you're still going to end up dodging a huge chunk of battles as they waste your resources, unless they've found some way to force you to do them. The PROBLEM with Sticker Star was not just the stylistic change, the PROBLEM with Color Splash is not just that the world looks like a papercraft, or that there are cards involved.

The problem is that a central, core thing in RPGs is having a character that gets stronger, whose arsenal of moves gets bigger and better over time, a sense of progression, and of customization. In 64 and TTYD AND Super, you had that feeling of getting stronger, of growing better over time. In Sticker Star and Color Splash, battles are just a fucking annoyance that waste your stickers/cards, giving you coins you can use to (wait for it) get more cards. It's bland, and boring, and there's nothing fun about it. It is all the trappings of an RPG with none of the actual grit.

I tried to like Sticker Star; really, I really did, but it was a soul-crushingly boring and (excuse me) flat game. There was zero depth to it, and the shallow mechanics weren't even fun at all. Worse, they fucked up the latest Mario and Luigi by dragging Paper Mario's new blandness into it, and the game SUFFERED AS A RESULT. You will get tired of Color Splash the same way I got tired of Sticker Star, and the same way I got tired of Paper Jam Bros. It is all the fucking SAME. IT IS THE SAME SHIT IN NEW AND VIBRANT LOCALES, AND IT'S ALL FUCKING AWFUL, ALL OF IT. Oh you're tired of fighting koopa troopas HERE HAVE STACKED KOOPA TROOPAS LOOK AT HOW INVENTIVE AND CLEVER WE ARE.

And all of those are mechanics complaints, mind you. I'm not even, I'm not touching the story, or the blandness of the locales or the fact that we'll never get another English-translated game out of Nintendo without Treehouse's fucking dirty politically-motivated shit smeared all over it.

I'm complaining about the fact that they took arguably the best Mario RPG ever produced– a turn-based RPG with a ridiculously fun and interesting combat system, unique characters, a dark and gritty locale, witty (not lolsorandum) humor and funny moments, actually diverse and interesting places to go, weird and entertaining premises for each part of the game– followed it up with a weird-but-different game that wasn't as good, and then completely lost the plot.

this video is 5 hours long

is that it, the entire game is only 5 hours long?

There's four videos, so no. Of all the things to be upset over, the game's length is not one of them.

It's like they have no idea why Paper Mario, and apparently Splatoon now, were fundamentally so well received in the first place.

wat

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