Do you guys want to play a game?
I found this mobile shit, it's a choose your own adventure story and it picks up right after the end of Mean Girls, which I'm sure all of you have seen.
I don't know how it works, and I don't know if it's good, but it might be fun.
Dubs gets the choice.
We're the new girl at school. What's our name?
You got this game because they advertise heavily on Tumblr, didn't you?
Anyways, your name is Tim Buckley
CIA
I saw this really weird advertisement while I was watching something else and it looked so cringey I just could not give it a try
Katy Perry
Jimbo Billybob
Bum Tickley.
Jimbo billybob it is.
How do we look?
Give a vidya game character and if you get dubs I'll try my best to replicate it
That film did nothing but fuel my bimbo fetish.
eikichi mishina from persona 2
Let's see if we can play as Quiet, from MGS.
Big nosed black womyn with bright colored hair.
this upsets me
Vahlen from the new xcom games
female link
Juri
I going to assume that the customizer isn't that impressive with nothing beyond casual clothes, so I guess we can try Hitomi from DOA
We need the biggest whore lips possible.
this
Alright Mr quads
Mom has told us very politely to get ready to go to school. Do we act like a bitch or like a normal person?
Fucking checked.
Be sweet.
Bitch at her because we hate our name.
SNAP LIKE A CUNT
Snibeti snab
SNAP
Go nuts
Replicate a typical teenage girl. Be a cunt.
Seems like everybody wants to snap, so here you go.
What do we wear?
The choices are basically:
What do you want?
The cheap whore.
WHORE
Whore
Scholarly.
Oh boy. Sounds like the kind of hard hitting storytelling I need OP. Mean Girls is actually a good movie and I highly recommend watching it.
Tumblr
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If this was a weeb game, then scholarly all the way. But it's western, which makes "scholarly" a code word for "such a nerd lolxD"
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Fashion forward. Fuck it. Let's see how haute this couture gets.
Whore votes seem to be more, so let's go wit that.
Mom has her panties in a twist about us being cunts. How do we feel about today?
Mom doesn't seem to approve of your attire choice. Look at that face.
Apathetic.
Apathetic, she looks like she was already raped.
Excited
...
Terrified.
I'm terrified.
Mom calls us a whore and then we're off to school.
We have to go see the guidance counselor, but before we find these two fags who take a selfie with us and then ask us if we want to go with them.
Do we follow them, to a very probable rape, or not?
Go with them. She has a stud in her nose and he looks like he's on Ritalin. What's the worst that could happen? :^)
Go to girl world. I want to be dissapointed.
Better decline. Going with them might lead to "connecting" and stuff.
Either way you're fucked, the counselor is probably a serial rapist, might as well go with the other two and break some rules.
Too bad we can't impolitely decline.
Fuck the rules, we're going with.
Go get raped by the counselor.
reroll
Popularity says we go with them. They give us a rundown of the groups, we crush on the brooding loner after seeing him for 2 seconds and then we have to choose where do we fit in.
If this were a better game we would be able to chose more stuff, instead we have:
Don't disappoint me and do the right choice.
(checked)
band geeks
I don't wanna hang with any of these fags.
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Ugh. Excuse me but "Cliques" are just a social construct to opress stronk independent womyn. Like I can't even, you guys. You are literally triggering me.
Is that Manly Tears' lost brother?
We tell them we fit with the band geeks, and then tell them we were kidding.
So I guess that was completely pointless.
In a turn of events, there seems to be a party going on later. How do we feel about it?
Par-tay, woooooo!
She likes it nasty.
Go get wasted off of diet soda because we're a stupid high school bitch.
If we are roleplaying a whore then of course we go to the party
There's a lot of video games we have to play at home
Did the fat guy even say anything until now? Do we even know him?
Not that I should talk, I don't have time to edit that pic.
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We tell them it's nasty, but they still tell us we should go, maybe some party rape is what we need.
We then leave to find the office and we find this whore recording her live blog.
She then asks us for our last name. Seems like Billybob isn't our last name anymore but more like a second name now.
What's our last name?
Trump
The hedgehog
Mother of all Omelets
Colom/v/ine
He's just admiring her scalp.
Bobby Jim
This
Okay, we're jimbo billybob the hedgehog.
The bitch then asks us why did we change schools, what do we tell her?
Roll with it.
Kicked out for being raped.
Roll with it, we're a rebellious bitch who don't need no man.
Pretend to be a 2cool4skool kid. Start coughing your lungs out if she offers a cig.
Roll with it.
As a hedgehog it's your duty to roll with it
We tell her we were kicked out for fighting with 30 girls, but we know it was more of an orgy.
She then remarks how much we look like a whore. Then we leave.
But UH OH, we walk by mistake in the boys bathroom. What will happen?
[continued in next post]
Aw yiss, time for sluts.
Alright let's get to work. Remember 60% off today only.
I guess we got our first John.
She looks awfully worried for an apathetic harlot.
Looks like we attracted the attention of the beautiful Latino looking hunk.
We then go to the girls bathroom and meet with Lindsay lohan, who asks us if we can help her with some boyfriend issues.
I don't know what the second option means.
Is this some sort of doubles related activity?
Stay.
stay
Damn, he really is a fucking manlet.
Rain check means to postpone what she's asking.
Stay though.
We're a flexible whore. girls get 60% off too.
Might as well help. There might be one non-cunt at this school.
When there isn't we should go Soddam and Gammorah on it
Her boyfriend has been most likely banging whores at college.
Couldn't take a picture of the picture she showed, but it was the guy with his hand on a tumblr looking whore.
Do you think he's fucking her? What dinner say?
CUCK HER.
SOMETHING LOOKS FISHY
IT'S HER CUNT
No worries m8, we'll fuck him later too.
Is the boyfriend the little disproportionate hunky?
Tough choice, you could try disrupting the relationship to ruin the other whore and steal her business, but on the other hand you could let it slide and hope it backfires on the bitch you're trying to help.
Agreeing with the cheating accusation opens an avenue for profeteering.
Naw he's some guy at college. Looks like young Zac Efron
Tell her it looks fishy. Then fuck her.
SOMETHING LOOKS FISHY
AND IT'S NOT YOUR UGLY FISH FACE FOR ONCE, YOU UGLY CUNT
We tell her he might be cheating.
She then asks us if there's anything else we want to know.
What do we want to know?
the party, because we're vapid
Nothinng
...
Can't wait to go to the par-tay!
Her at the lunch. Where to meet her fuckhole.
Lunch, try to get her interested. We still at 0 customers and we already wasted the morning, dammit.
If she can suck a golf ball through a garden hose
Jamal is going to struck a bitch
AverageKickstarerdev.jpg
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3.3 Million/3.3 Million
Ask about Micah.
We gotta get sum fugg, this shit is getting boring.
ask about the party
We ask about the party, and get an invitation.
You then go see Barack obama, who is the councelor. He asks us what we want to do after school.
Games Journalist
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Entrepreneur means whore.
What the fuck, did the principal have nothing to fucking do so he decided to take the counselor's place?
Yeah we need to up our whoring skills. Only the janitor pretending to be principal is showing interest.
The phone seems like some sort of a metaphor for an upcoming PENIS
penis entrepreneur
man I loved these threads back in the day,
Then they became too plenty and died off.
It's nice to feel a bit of the old days.
posted in right thread
thanks for wasting the dubs
We tell him we want to be a dick entrepreneur and that we want to go to yale.
We then go on a weird discussion about how your mom got a sperm donor and you don't have a dad.
But shit, there's only one place for Yale and it seems like Regina wants to go there too. Will it be resolved in a mud wrestling match? Who knows.
Can't play anymore for today, but that's episode 1.
Maybe I'll keep going tomorrow. Thanks for participating :3
We will be the new sperm bank by the end of this.
Wow what a cliffhanger
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I might have to watch mean girls again, I don't remember anything about daddy spermies
What? Did I miss something?
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but what about swords
Take note guys, this is what Holla Forums actually plays when they're done pretending to hate on every AAA and milestone out there.
And you wonder how they had it so easy, enrolling half Holla Forums into socjus. It's ironic! Let's take it in the ass ironically.
When's the last time you had fun user?