WARIO THREAD

How does a fat slob get to hang with such hotties all the time?

Because he's a gigantic jew with billions of dollars and is sexy as fuck

>How does an extremely rich and successful (to the point of having his own goddamn castle, media empire and etc.) plus muscular-armed fat slob get to hang with such hotties all the time?

Both fixed and answered that question for you.

end yourself OP

oh, she's there

It's scientifically proven that many women produce a magnetically charged hormone that causes arousal when in the presence of precious metals like Gold, Silver, and platinum, but also has been observed to produce jolts of electricity in a manner similar to piezoelectricity when in close proximity to gem stones.

This amazing hormone has been dubbed "shallogen", as it's mostly exhibited in women who are so shallow that they would fuck Jabba the Hut if it meant they could swim in a pool of gold coins.

where

The first thing any boy needs to learn about women while growing up is that they're all basically Scrooge McDuck, but with all the "badass motherfucker and awesome grandpa" bits replaced with pure greed.

Lmao

fucking hell I just noticed it

Wario is NTR for kids.

Wario and daisy both originated from the Mario Land series.

Even before Wario was made, he was getting all the best hotties.

Most of the girls in Wario games are richer than he is.
Hell, 2 of them fall in love with Wario WHILE he's robbing them. (Wario Land 4, and Wario Land Shake it)

Wario wasn't associated with Daisy, really. At best he had a massive statue of Princess Peach in Wario Land: SML3

Wasn't he trying to stop Mario from rescuing Daisy?

No, that was Tatanga. Wario just smelled a free chance to take over Mario's castle in the meantime.

Had Luigi manned up and done it, Wario probably wouldn't have bothered.

Daisy was kidnapped by Tatanga I had to look it up in SML1. Wario wasn't introduced until SML2, which I don't think had Daisy.

Women like a man with confidence who knows and goes after what he wants. Wario is as alpha as they get.

Clearly they were fated by the universe to be together by that reason alone.

Wario has a closer connection to Daisy than luigi ever did.

Had Tatanga, though, where he was an underling of Wario's serving as the boss for the space-themed area.

Wario's smarter than we give him credit for, Super Mario Land might've been a bigass ploy to get a free castle.

Wario is the greatest jew who ever lived.

Wario da bess

How the fuck did Mario even get a castle in the first place?

He and Luigi are the only plumbers in the universe so they're probably making bank. Especially with how many pipes there are around the mushroom kingdom. When you think about it, Mario is the real jew here.

...

He threw the previous resident into lava

Mario isn't a plumber. He's a Super.

Mario is not a nigger

He's Sicilian

That was actually a decent black show.

In this country, you gotta make the coins first. Then when you get the coins, you get the power-ups. Then when you get the power-ups, then you get the women.

Goddamn it Nintendo, learn how actual strong men look like!

- Me, I want what's coming to me.
- Oh, well what's coming to you, Wario?
- The kingdom, Waluigi, and everything in it.

wario is filthy rich, gives no shit what others think about him and doesnt afraid of anything

She and Mario are your rivals when you choose Wario in Mario Kart 8.

No, the real question what happened to it? Why did never appeared in his gokart tracks or sports?

Is Donal Trump a Wario's pupil?

Where Mario is pussywhipped, Wario fucks bitches and gets money

It seems like you MGTOWs took the wrong turn. Here, let me redirect you:
>>>/r9k/
>>>/reddit/

Summer truly has arrived.

Not only is your meme bad but it's not even summer here, Amerifat.

Aussie confirmed

Yeah. And?

Mario Kart 8 has a rival system?


Never even noticed.

Speaking of Wario, I have a Game Boy Color and Wario Land 2. After the unskippable cutscene and first level title the game resets for some reason. Wat do?

He has charm.

Who the FUCK decided this was a good idear?

Eggsalad music, though.

I always thought Wario was an electrician due to his yellow hat and frizzled stache.

If Game Theory's theories and timelines are actuallytrue (they have lot of bullshit, lot's of the Mario stuff make sense).
The Wario games happen after the very end of the Mario games's timeline. Where Luigi and Peach get together and Mario gets Daisy and later is seen with a castle and no Daisy. He either got a castle as a reward or usurped Daisy and turned Sarasaland in Marioland. Wario steals the castle and Mario's final quest is not to save any princess, but his own property. As Mario and Luigi are kings, the focus shifts to the only character in the series that is having any adventures: Wario.

This is what happens when you try to add a timeline to a series that shouldn't really have one