White people and their dogs thread!

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I WIN (again)

Me vs Holla Forums

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If I want to see 9gag tier picture then I'll go there.

Is this /brit/pol/ or something? I never understood whom this was intended to trigger. It's not even good gore.

Fuck off chinks. Reported

I have no gondola D;

Have this instead.

This is now "an OP and cock" thread

thats a ruskie from the caucasus, u can tell coz his eyebrows almost touch

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Someone doesn't know how to raid

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No, let him keep doing it. He really thinks it bothers us.

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it bothers you?

Cool!!

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No u

Step it up

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FUK YO DOWGZ!!!!!!!!!!!!

Reported, nice b8 shill

what the fuck

Done it 100 times!

proxies & vpn, bitch!

You posted that in the last thread you fucking faggot. Weak.

Does anybody have a webm of all those Muslims getting smoked by a crane in Mecca? I thought I saved it but I can't find it now.

The only thing that bothers me is that an innocent thread had to die for no reason.

maybe TRSodomites?

Cry moar.

Faggot.

OP don't be such a faggot and at least post interesting stuff like the guy getting a deepthroat from a snapping turtle

You just need to kill yourself once, you fucking weak shill.

Thanks for playing.

I guess it can't be helped.

sage you fucking nigger

Kill yourself and kill your children and wife first

No u

U are a fat guy

F.F.F.F FAGGOT FAILED.

if they're gonna bump, they may as well bump meaningful pictures

you likey dud dug?

...

Why haven't you done it already. I'll give you a shekel

Welcome to Holla Forums. Now get out

shitty thread, barley fappable material

Looks like your mom

Do you know where you are, m8?

That IS interesting. Tell me more user.

...

In the oven you go

ITS DEADDDDDDDDDDDDDD!

...

………DDEEEAADD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just like your entire race
Remember the 6 million ?

Because I'll never have an excuse to post this on Holla Forums again.

Holla Forums thread!

in china dey say.

…. DDDEAAAD DOOOOGZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

...

jej almost missed with that second to last one.

Thats where you come from

Hey, a webm. Anyway, who cares? Are you PETA or something?

I'LL FUCK THE HOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

People Eating Tasty Animals?

YEAH!

Com'on bro you're getting this shit from the first page of Google Image search for "dead dog." Would you at least put in an effort?

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PST MORE U FUCKING FAGGOT!!!!!!!!!

DDDDERD DERGGGSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Respond to threads like this with beautiful pictures of what we stand for.

It's just a video of a fat fuck that breaks the jaw of the turtle and forces it to give him a blowjob, I had it saved but I deleted it because I never used it

Why do non-whites hate dogs so much anyhow?

STAND FOR THIS!!!!!!!

←-

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Having fun getting attention from Internet frog nazis are we?

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oh, its the same shill that got btfo'd in his "le trump is zionist shill maymay" thread. Keep trying, you'll get it soon. I believe in you

why do people kneejerk over deaddogs, but not deadcows you see in a butchershop everyday? Seems to be the human condition of what is acceptable, and what is not, like nazi's circle jerking

you obviously dont "stand for that" if you did you would have more to offer than the first page search results of a google images search.

REMINDER, FELLAS, SHILLS GET PAID PER REPLY.. WHEN YOU SEE A SHILL POST OR SHILL THREAD IT IS BETTER THAT YOU DONT REPLY AT ALL, NOT EVEN TO SAGE AND INSTEAD HIDE, FILTER AND (((REPORT)))

>IMPLYING THE MODS ARENT SHILLS THEMSELVES

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Here we go again, another fucking dickhead trying to tell me how to live my life. This babyfur_watch asshole on here, commenting on my LJ telling me that im making a big mistake by throwing away my college education just to, quote, "Roll around in crapped diapers and meddling in cheap and petty BDSM fetishes." Who the fuck do you think you are saying this shit, i swear to the fuckin heavens above if i knew where you were, i would come over, break my foot off in your ass and slice your damn throat. I have enough crap coming from my dad and grandmother about the way im living my life, so i dont need to hear it from some fucking scumbag like you. There are two things you do not fuck with when it comes to me, my friends and my lifestyle. You screw with either one of those things and you're gonna have one pissed off fox on your ass. Just becuase im a babyfur doesnt mean that i dont have a dark side, i will go medevil on you if you provoke me. I'm getting fuckin sick and tired of these fuckers thinking that since we're babyfurs that they can push us around and redicule us and not have us fight back. Most, if not all of us babyfurs get pissed off if an outsider decides to fuck with us. You may not like the fact that we are babyfurs, but you will fucking respect it, that's all we ask anyways. Everyone has their fetishes, and ours just happens to be wearing and using diapers, sucking on pacifiers and bottles, wearing baby clothes and acting like baby's. We aint hurtin no one by doing this, but there are some that are making it seem that way, which is complete and udder bullshit. As far as the BDSM stuff go, so what, i wanna be owned by someone and dommed by them, big deal. Keep your fucking comments to yourself if all they're gonna do is gonna piss off whoever your sending it to. Use common since you stupid pricks…oh wait, you dont have any!

u should smile more!

woops try again.

Stop replying to off topic bait threads cuckchan morons.

Someone give me a /quickRundown/ on OP. Why does he have the butthurt?

If you are reading this then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don't you have other things to do? Is your life so empty that you honestly can't think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with authority that you give respect and credence to all who claim it? Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Do you think everything you're supposed to think? Buy what you're told you should want? Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex. Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic. You have been warned…… Tyler

because his Trump is a kike shill threads keep getting deleted

DEAD DORGSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HI… I'M GEORGE ZIMMER - FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN'S WEARHOUSE. ASHLEE, I'D LIKE TO BEAT YOUR CHEST WITH MY ENORMOUSLY HEAVY, THROBBING PELVIC CROCODILE UNTIL I GEYSER A HUGE WATERFALL OF STICKY BABY DRESSING ON YOUR FACE. I'LL MOP IT UP WITH MY THICK HEAD AND SLAP IT ON YOUR LIPS SO THEY DON'T CHAP. YOU'LL CUM SO HARD YOUR DOWNSTAIRS NEIGHBORS WILL NEE woah fuckD TO CHANGE THEIR SHEETS. I GUARANTEE IT.

uh oh try again.

...

I see. So did endchan get too lonely for him? He should go there and circlejerk with all the other anti-Trump cucks.

rlof epic meltdown, you fucking loser, go goosestep round your bedroom

you are not Tyler durden,

you are a faggot.

(ded cat 4 u)

I guess, but it seems to piss him off if you just keep posting "try again"

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Subhumans do not understand order and beauty so their only reaction is to hate it.

have some anime
I've heard it's kryponite for shills

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I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN'S WEARHOUSE. MY SECRETARY, FOLLOWING A BARBARIC BEAVER BEATING THAT SLOUGHED OFF HER UTERINE LINING MORE EFFECTIVELY THAN HER OWN MENSTRUAL CYCLE, INFORMED ME THAT MY TWO LEAST FAVORITE ARTISTS, 311 AND SCOTT STAPP, WERE RECENTLY INVOLVED IN A SCUFFLE. HISTORICALLY A MEDIATOR, I FLEW IN MY LEARJET TO MEET THE TWO BANDS. THE TWO GROUPS WERE WHINING LIKE ANNA NICOLE SMITH AFTER INHERITANCE MONEY UNTIL I PREPPED THE MEMBERS OF 311 FOR THE IMPENDING IMPALEMENT WITH A COMPREHENSIVE COATING OF NUT NECTAR, GLUING THEM TO THE GROUND. AFTER SUSTAINING A BLUNT FORCE TRAUMA TO THE HEAD FROM MY CROTCH CRUSHING CONCUSSION CANE, STAPP WAS TAKEN 'HIGHER' THAN EVER BEFORE AS HE WAS BOUNCED LIKE A BABY UPON THE Z-MAN'S TWO-TON TROUSER-SCHNAUZER, WHILE THE 311 MEMBERS WERE HELD CAPTIVE BY THEIR OWN ASSHOLES LIKE BOWLING BALLS. THE FORCE FROM MY CULVERT-SIZED COCK SPLITTING STAPP APART WAS ENOUGH TO CAUSE HIM TO DEVELOP DUAL PERSONALITY DISORDER. AS STAPP PROCEEDED TO BLEED TO DEATH, MY STEADFAST SLUT-SPEARING SON-SIRING SKINFLUTE BURST THROUGH THE LEAD SINGER'S BVD'S, CAUSING HIM TO BREAK OUT INTO A RAPE-INSPIRED RENDITION OF 'COME ORIGINAL'. I COULD ONLY INTERPRET HIS SINGING TO INDICATE IT WAS TIME TO FINISH UP, SO I BURIED THE ALT-ROCK GREAT IN A GOOEY GRAVE OF GONAD GOULASH. MY GROIN YETI IS NOW THE SIXTH MEMBER OF 311, I GUARANTEE IT.

uh oh, try again.

...

HI, I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN'S WEARHOUSE. 9/11 WAS A LIE. THERE WERE NO TOWEL HEADS. THERE WAS NO AIRPLANE. IN TRUTH I WAS VISITING THE BIG APPLE, SO AS TO COMPARE MY GARGANTUAN MEAT TRAIN TO IT AND LAUGH AT THE GASPING NEW YORKERS AS I POUNDED THEIR BELOVED NAMESAKE INTO BIG APPLE SAUCE. HAVING NOT GOTTEN RELEASE FROM MY CULINARY EXERCISE, I MEANDERED DOWN THE STREET WITH MY VITAL BLOOD ENGORGED SEWER PIPE OUT IN FRONT OF ME LIKE A BLIND MAN'S CANE, LOOKING FOR A HOLE IN THE BACKSIDE OF A WOMAN WHICH I WOULD STRETCH BEYOND HUMAN LIMITS. I SPOTTED AT THAT VERY MOMENT AN ATTRACTIVE FEMALE IN A MINISKIRT WAVING AT ME. I SLAPPED HER TO THE GROUND WITH MY ENORMOUS PHALLUS AND QUICKLY RAVISHED HER SKIRT LIKE A STARVED DOG ON A BABY MADE OF STEAK. THE SIGHT THAT AWAITED BOTH SHOCKED AND ENRAGED ME. AFTER SEEING THIS "WOMAN'S" RAISIN-SIZED WINKY WINKLER, I VOMITED DOWN HIS THROAT AND PENETRATED HIS ESOPHAGUS, RIPPED OUT HIS SPINE AND PEELED HIS CORPSE FROM MY MONEYMAKER. TO TEACH ALL OF NEW YORK A LESSON FOR LETTING THIS FLAMING FAG BAG LIVE, I LET LOOSE A SEMENAL FLOOD OF BIBLICAL PROPORTIONS UPON THE TOWERS OF TWO (AT WHOM'S SMALL SIZE I LAUGHED LIKE A CLOWN RAPING AN 8 YEAR OLD), WHICH CAUSED THEM TO COME CRASHING DOWN LIKE ME AFTER A WEEKEND METH BINGE. I MOCKED THE NEW YORKERS AND MADE NIGGER JOKES AS THEY RAN FROM MY EVER EXPANDING CLOUD OF SPERMAZOA, MASTURBATING TO THE LOOKS OF HORROR ON THEIR FACES. THE GOVERNMENT, IN AN ATTEMPT TO SAVE FACE AND BECAUSE THEY HATE ARABS MORE THAN JEWS, PAINTED A BOEING 767 ON MY GIGANTIC COCK AND CALLED IT A TERRORIST ATTACK. THE FEELING OF PAINTBRUSHES ON MY DICK MADE ME COME AGAIN, AND PRESIDENT BUSH SNORTED UP EVERY LAST DROP BECAUSE HE THOUGHT IT WAS COKE. SUDDENLY, HE CRIED OUT, "WHAT'S THAT AMAZING SMELL?" THEN A GROSSLY OBESE NEGRO POPPED OUT FROM BEHIND THE BURNING, TWISTED WRECKAGE OF THE WORLD TRADE CENTERS AND QUIPPED, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINE-SOL!" DISPLEASED AT HER INTERRUPTION OF MY DEVASTATING SODOMY CONQUEST, YET SIMULTANEOUSLY ODDLY AROUSED BY A SUB-HUMANS DEFIANCE IN THE FACE OF MY TITANIC MEAT MONOLITH, I GRABBED THE NEGRESS BY HER ARMS AND INSERTED MY BATTLE CRUISER OF PASSION INTO THE ROILING WAVES OF FAT WHICH OBSCURED HER VAGINAL CLEFT. SHE SCREAMED INDECHIPHERABLY IN EBONICS, SO TO SHUT HER UP I POURED ALL THE CONTENTS OF THE PINE-SOL BOTTLE DOWN HER THROAT. UNFORTUNATELY, THE CHEMICALS IN THE LIQUID COMBINED WITH MY UNEARTHLY SUPER-SEMEN TO FORM A HIGHLY UNSTABLE AND EXPLOSIVE MIXTURE OF PURE POWER. JUST BEFORE THE FAT NEGRESS BLEW APART AS A RESULT OF THE INCREDIBLE CHEMICAL REACTION, MY MOTHER GOT SCARED AND SAID, "YOU'RE MOVING WITH YOUR AUNTIE AND UNCLE IN BEL-AIR." I WHISTLED FOR A CAB AND WHEN IT CAME NEAR, THE LICENSE PLATE SAID 'FRESH' AND IT HAD DICE IN THE MIRROR. IF ANYTHING I COULD SAY THAT THIS CAB WAS RARE, BUT I THOUGHT, 'NAH, FORGET IT, YOU HOLMES, TO BEL-AIR!" I PULLED UP TO THE HOUSE ABOUT SEVEN OR EIGHT AND I YELLED TO THE CABBY, YO HOLMES, SMELL YA LATER!" I LOOKED AT MY KINGDOM, I WAS FINALLY THERE, TO SIT ON MY THRONE AS THE PRINCE OF BEL-AIR. ONCE I ENTERED MY NEW, PALATIAL ABODE (ALMOST, BUT NOT QUITE, WORTHY OF MY INCALCULABLY HUGE MEAT MISSILE) I IMMEDIATELY SWEPT MY NEW FOSTER PARENTS ASIDE AND HEADED FOR THE ROOM OF THEIR YOUNG NIECE. YOU SEE, I JUST SPENT THE LAST TWENTY MINUTES RUBBING A TWELVE YEAR OLD GIRL'S BARE CHEST. "HOW?" YOU ASK. WELL APPARENTLY THERE ARE A SELECT FEW CONTEXTS WITHIN WHICH SUCH AN ACTION IS ACCEPTABLE. FOR INSTANCE, IF YOUR NIECE HAS A HACKING COUGH AND YOUR SISTER ASKS YOU TO "PUT SOME OF THIS ON HER" WHILE SHE CALLS THE DOCTOR.

"PUTTING SOME OF THIS ON HEAR" MEANT USING MY BARE HANDS TO RUB THIS VAPOR OINTMENT SHIT ALL OVER HER BARE NAKED CHEST. MY HEARTBEAT IS STILL ALL ERRATIC FROM IT. I HAD A BONER THE SIZE OF MANHATTAN THE ENTIRE TIME. SHE'S SLEEPING NOW AND I GUESS SHE FEELS BETTER BECAUSE SHE STOPPED COUGHING.

DETAILS: SHE'S ABOUT 5 FEET TALL, HAS LONG BROWN HAIR, A CUTE FACE, A THIN WAIST AND LONG SKINNY LEGS. SHE'S IN JAMMIES I THINK BECAUSE ALTHOUGH I'M PRETTY SHAKEN UP RIGHT NOW I KNOW I UNBUTTONED SOMETHING BEFORE I WENT AT IT.

GOD I FEEL SO GREAT. I JUST RUBBED MY HANDS LAL OVER HER FUCKING TITS, YOU GUYS. WELL THE PUFFY PARTS OF HER CHEST ANYWAY. HER NIPPLES GOT HARD. I JUST ABOUT WEPT TEARS OF JOY. OBVIOUSLY, THERE ARE VERY FEW THINGS IN THIS UNIVERSE WHICH CAN BRING ME TO SUCH A STATE, AND COMBINED WITH MY INCREDIBLE STATE OF AROUSAL, I WAS UNABLE TO HOLD BACK THE STORM BREWING IN MY COLOSSAL PUDDING BLASTER. MY STEAMING-HOT SILVER LAVA BLASTED OUT FURIOUSLY, INSTANTLY KILLING MY UNFORTUNATE YOUNG COUSIN AND REDUCING MY NEW HOME TO BLASTED BITS AND PIECES OF WOODEN DETRITUS. I GUARANTEE IT.

...

HI, I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN'S WEARHOUSE. ONE DAY, ABOUT A WEEK AGO, I WAS HOLDING A MEETING WITH MY COMPANY'S BOARD OF DIRECTORS, EXPLAINING THE IMPORTANCE OF DEDICATION, AND QUALITY IN THE SALE OF OUTRAGEOUSLY DAPPER SUITS, WHEN I NOTICED ONE OF THE MEMBERS OF THE BOARD WAS, IN FACT, A STUNNINGLY BEAUTIFUL BLOND FEMALE, HER BEAUTY MATCHED ONLY BY HER PROFESSIONAL MANNER AND ABSOLUTELY ELEGANT SUIT. THIS COMBINATION OF STIMULI GAVE MY MONOLITHIC CROTCH CANNON NO CHOICE BUT TO AUGMENT AND OBLITERATE MY PANTS. WITHIN MOMENTS MY MY MEMBER HAD DESOLATED THE BOARD ROOM, THE TABLE HAVING BEEN SMASHED UNDER THE SHEER GIRTH OF MY PELVIC PULVERISER, AND THE WOMAN IN QUESTION WAS IMPALED ON ITS GARGANTUAN TIP, HAVING THROWN HERSELF IN ITS APOCALYPTIC PATH OF DESTRUCTION IN AN EFFORT NOT ONLY TO SAVE THE LIVES OF HER COLLEAGUES, BUT TO EXPERIENCE FIRSTHAND THE QUASI-RELIGEOUS EXPERIENCE THAT IS ZIMMER. AS MY TROUSER TRUNCHEON EXPANDED, DEMOLISHING WALLS AND DISPATCHING THE INTERNS WHO ATTEMPTED TO ESCAPE WITH THEIR LIVES RATHER THAN THROW THEMSELVES AT THE MERCY OF MY THROBBING FLESH MISSLE. MOMENTS LATER MY PHALLUS HAD KNOCKED OUT MANY OF THE BUILDING'S SUPPORT BEAMS AND THE FLOORS OVERHEAD CRASHED DOWN, THE FORCE OF THEIR MOMENTUM CAUSING THE ENTIRE BUILDING ITSELF TO COLLAPSE IN A NIGHTMARISH MANNER NOT UNLIKE A FAMOUS DISASTER FROM A FEW YEARS AGO. RISING FROM THE RUBBLE, WITH THE STUNNING BOARD MEMBER STILL ON THE TIP OF MY GOD-SHLONG CRYING ALOUD FOR MERCY, HER SUIT AS WELL AS MINE UTTERLY RUINED BY THE AFFAIR, AS WELL AS A DOZEN OTHERS STILL CLINGING TO THE SHAFT. I LET OUT A THUNDERING ROAR AND LET SPEW FORTH MY SEED WITH SUCH AWE-INSPIRING FORCE THAT THE LOAD SHATTERED THE SOUND BARRIER, VAPOURIZING MY LUSTY ASSOCIATE, CRUSHING EVERYONE IN SIGHT AND SHATTERING EVERY WINDOW IN A 5-MILE RADIUS. IN THE AFTERMATH, STANDING NAKED AND COVERED IN CEMENT DUST, AND SMILING CONTENTLY AT THE DEMOLISHED, SEMEN-COVERED RUINS BEFORE ME, I SPOTTED A SMALL DOG, STUMBING IN THE DEBRIS, ITS EARS BLEEDING AND GASPING FOR BREATH IN THE HUMID MUSK. I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF. WITH A LOUD THUD MY ELEPHANTINE MAN-HAMMER HAD CRUSHED THE ANIMAL LIKE A THICK, MEATY FLYSWATTER. I GUARANTEE IT.

MAXIMUM EDGE

(checked)
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

HI, I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN'S WEARHOUSE. MANY YEARS AGO, A MENTALLY HANDICAPPED MCDONALDS EMPLOYEE PILFERED AN OUTRAGEOUSLY DAPPER SUIT FROM MY ILLUSTRIOUS STORE AND WRONGFULLY CLAIMED IT AS HIS OWN. INSULTED BY HIS DISHONESTY, MY MASSIVE MANHOOD MISSILE TORE OUT OF MY FRESHLY TAILORED PANTS, AND VICIOUSLY SLAMMED HIM INTO PAVEMENT, RATTLING HIS BONES AND SEVERING HIS FORESKIN. THE LOOKS OF INNOCENCE, ABJECT TERROR, AND PURE SADNESS IN HIS EYES EMOTIONALLY AND CHEMICALLY UNITED AND FORMED AN APHRODISIAC WHICH EMANATED FROM HIS VERY SOUL. AROUSED BY THIS DISPLAY AND WITH MY OBLITERATED PANTS LAID STREWN AROUND MY ANKLES, I CHARGED AT HIM WITH THE FEROCITY OF A FEMALE GRIZZLY BEAR PROTECTING ITS YOUNG. THE BEWILDERED YET FRIGHTENED LOOK THAT GRACED HIS TEAR-COVERED, DOWN'S SYNDROME-SHAPED FACE AS MY PULSATING POWER PUMP RUSHED TO MEET HIS FACE HAS CAUSED AND WILL CONTINUE TO CAUSE ME UPROARIOUS, RUMBLING LAUGHTER FOR MANY DECADES TO COME. SCARED AND HELPLESS, HE BEGAN TO WADDLE AWAY BUT ALAS, HIS EFFORTS WERE FUTILE. BEFORE HE COULD STUMBLE AWAY FROM MY GRASP, I CLOSED THE DISTANCE BETWEEN US WITH MY MASSIVE, MENACING MEMBER, AND HE SOON GOT A TASTE OF MY COLLOSSAL CUM CANNON AS IT SMASHED INTO HIS CRANIUM, WHICH WAS QUITE PUNY BY COMPARISON. THE FORCE OF MY CYCLOPEAN CUNT CLOBBERER SENT HIM HURTLING ACROSS THE ROOM, THROUGH SEVERAL DESKS, AND FINALLY CAUSED HIM TO SLAM HEADFIRST INTO A DISPLAY OF MY DELIGHTFULLY DAPPER SUITS. I VAULTED OVER TO HIM WITH THE HELP OF MY PULSATING PYTHON OF POON-POUNDING, AND THEN LIFTED HIM UP AND PINNED HIM AGAINST THE ORNATELY-DECORATED CEILING WITH THE HEAD OF MY CAREFULLY MANUEVERED CERVIX CRUSADER. AS I WATCHED ALL HOPE DISSAPPEAR FROM HIS GRIEF-STRICKEN FACE, I BESPATTERED HIM WITH A DELUGE OF MASTERFULLY SPREAD MANJUICE, DROWNING HIM IN MY RICH PROTEIN SHAKE AND CORRUPTING HIS SOUL. THE COPIOUS AMOUNT OF CORN SYRUP RUSHING FORTH FROM MY PULSATING, POWER-PACKED PLACENTA POKER QUICKLY FLOODED MY STORE AND RAISED THE EARTH'S SEA LEVEL BY APPROXIMATELY 10 PERCENT. BILLIONS OF PEOPLE GASPED FOR AIR AS THEY DROWNED IN LEGIONS OF MY STIFLINGLY SUBSTANTIAL SEED, AND MANY YEARS AFTER THIS INCIDENT, THE BODY OF THE MENTALLY HANDICAPPED MCDONALDS EMPLOYEE HAS NOT BEEN RECOVERED. I GUARANTEE IT.

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HI, I’M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN’S WEARHOUSE.

ONCE UPON A MIDNIGHT DREARY, WHILE I PONDERED WEAK AND WEARY OVER MANY A QUAINT AND CURIOUS 4CHAN MOD'S WHORISH MOTHER WHILE I NODDED, NEARLY NAPPING, SUDDENLY THERE CAME A TAPPING AT MY FANTASTIC FERTILITY FRANKFURTER "TIS SOME WHORE," I MUTTERED, "RAPPING AT MY VEINY VENEREAL VIENNA WIENERSCHNITZEL. ONLY THIS AND NOTHING MORE."

AH, DISTINCTLY I REMEMBER, IT WAS IN THE BLEAK DECEMBER, AND CHILL HAD WITHERED MY OPULENT ORAL OPIATE UPON THE FLOOR. WITH A BLINK I LOOKED AND SHUDDERED, MY FOOT IN VIEW MY SIGHT UNCLUTTERED I SIGHED AND BEGAN TO VISUALLY EXPLORE THE AREA AROUND MY COMPUTER. AND I DISCOVERED SOMETHING MORE.

THE FOOT I SAW BELONGED TO ANOTHER, A VIXEN BORN OF SOMETHING OTHER THIS WAS NO 4CHANNER’S WHORISH MOTHER, BUT A VISION OF LUST AND ANAL PLUNDER A MIGHTY AMAZON, CLOTHES TORN ASUNDER AND PANTING MIGHTILY AT MY APPARENT FUROR HAVING SEEN MY LANGUID LADIES LUXURY LOVELINER AND NOTHING MORE.

MY NEED AWAKENED AS MY COMPUTER DESK WEAKENED AND CRACKED BENEATH MY BEWITCHING BEEF BICYCLE MUCH TO THE DELIGHT OF THIS WOMAN, CHRISTENED LENORE. I STOOD WITH DIFFICULTY IN THE WRECKAGE AND OFFERED TO MY LADY A PACKAGE A NIGHT OF UNENDING UNSTOPPABLE UNDULATING AND NOTHING MORE. WITH A NOD AND SAUCY GRIN THE PRINCESS OF THIS TALE BEGAN TO SLIDE THE TIP OF HEAVEN IN AND WHILE I OFFERED TO BE GENTLE, YOURS TRULY ISN’T SENTIMENTAL AND SO I RAMMED HER WITH MY FORCE DU JOUR– A CARNAL CORINTHIAN COLUMN FORMED OF LUST AND WHORE. SHE CRIED IN ECSTASY, THEN WRITHED STILL MORE.

I REAMED HER ONCE INSIDE MY STUDY, AND THEN I BROUGHT HER TO A BEDROOM, WHERE I DELIGHTED HER WITH MY MIGHTY MAN MUSHROOM GALLANTLY GALLOPING THROUGH HER MUDDY ROAD TO BRING HER ORGASMS OF MAGNITUDE UNDISCOVERED AS SHE BEGGED FOR NOTHING BUT “MORE! MORE!”

AND SO WHEN MORNING ARRIVED AND ALTHOUGH SHE WAS FLUSTERED I ADDED AN ICING OF MY MAGNIFICENT MAN MUSTARD AND SHE SCREAMED MY NAME FOR NEARLY AN HOUR AS PASSIONS RAGED IN HER DELICATE FLOWER. SHE ASKED ME FOR MY NUMBER, AND PROMPTED ME TO GIVE IT. SO I TOLD HER TO VISIT THE MEN’S WEARHOUSE IN TUKTUT NUGAIT. “BABY, I’LL BE THERE,” I SAID, “I GUARANTEE IT.”

SIX MONTHS LATER, I SOLD HER FROZEN CORPSE TO THE CHINESE AS AN AUTHENTIC PRESERVED NATIVE AMERICAN. I GUARANTEE IT.

GO THE FUCK BACK TO SOMETHING AWFUL ALEX.NOBODY WANTS YOUR JEWISHNESS

Wot the fok did ye just say 2 me m8? i dropped out of newcastle primary skool im the sickest bloke ull ever meet & ive nicked ova 300 chocolate globbernaughts frum tha corner shop. im trained in street fitin’ & im the strongest foker in tha entire newcastle gym. yer nothin to me but a cheeky lil bellend w/ a fit mum & fakebling

This is nice thread.

Run out of Google imaged dead dogs?

What would happen if you combine a cheese grater with a plate? You’d have a plate that
grates!
Hi, Billy Mays here for the Grater Plater! It’s no
ordinary plate. Watch this.
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Children need sex. They require release like you do but are denied it with a partner who can teach them and guide them through it lovingly. Many young children masturbate for relief-and what does mom and dad do when they find out? Why, they slap the kids hands and tell them to stop or they will go blind! Once again, this only leads to oppressive, damaging GUILT. By age 11, I was a compulsive masturbator & collected hard-core pornographic magazines like HUSTLER! I was VERY sexual and I was asking for it on a regular basis (and never seemed to get it!) and yet society would have believed I was as innocent as can be. This harmed me. If I had only known a pedophile then, I would have been much happier in my childhood! But then again, if I had decided to have sex with a pedophile adult, they would have been imprisoned and I would have been in therapy for brainwashing to accept my "abuse". But my childhood had a happy ending-fate soon blessed me at 11 and a half with a woman pedophile who sexually educated me! Other kids are more like I was than you maybe would like to admit. Perhaps you were something like this in your own youth and due to guilt you wish not to admit this side of yourself existed. Think back and be honest with yourself-it is ok to be sexual and you are not alone or wrong! Stop feeling guilty about a natural bodily function and do not infect our kids!

Children do many things that are new to them. Sex is one of those things. A child must learn sometime, and "waiting for their wedding" is WAY too late! The sex drive is the most important one in our species besides breathing air and eating! We are made for sex! Children are made to enjoy it too! Repressing these feelings is NOT healthy. It is also unhealthy for kids to deny themselves relief. Sex by itself is NOT damaging to kids. This is a myth designed to attack pedophiles and deny kids their rights. In a misguided effort to "protect" kids, society has actually HARMED them by repressing perfectly natural feelings which DEMAND expression. Without it, healthy development and beliefs about sex are problematic. Kids masturbate and climax, and it does NOT "scar" them for life! By itself (remember-it is the guilt not the sex!) having sex with an adult (or another child) will NOT harm a child! It is a normal bodily function. Kids urinate and defecate as you do-they also experience sexual gratification (usually via masturbation) just as you do. A 10 year old boy may not ejaculate semen, but he CAN climax. A 10 year old girl can and often already does masturbate and she climaxes. Society needs to accept that kids are sexual beings.

no, he gets pissed if you keep posting "try again" at him in some form. Try it next time you see him in a thread, he likes to post that stupid fucking arrow to his picture. easily identifiable. It makes him leave the thread for some reason if you do it enough.

Give them that chance. Do not deny them the right of sexual free-expression. Children DO intitiate sexual contact with adults and there is nothing wrong with it. Adults can also intiate. We must teach our kids the importance of their right to own themselves. This means they can REFUSE sex with an adult at any time. It also means they can accept an offer and inititiate one themselves! This is the part that society hypocritically refuses to allow. They say kids own themselves, but when that belief is tested, society applies a double-standard and denies kids a right to do as they wish to themselves. Implied in the belief that kids can say no is the acceptance of them saying yes! You cannot have it both ways. Either they own their bodies or they do not. If they can only say "no" according to you, then they do not own themselves in your eyes! Pedophiles are the opposite of "predators". In fact, they are the ONLY TRUE "child advocates" in this regard on earth, since the take the child's wishes into full account! Pedophiles love children. That is what the word means, (pedo=child phile=lover) it is not a bad word to describe a monster-except in the eyes of the media which distorts and sadly shapes public opinion against child-loving advocates-i.e. pedophiles.

The problem pedophiles have (particularly male ones) is that if ANY adult shows a special excessive interest in kids, that person is immediately suspected of being a pedophile. This leads to pedophiles being separated from their outlets & it harms them. It also leads to kids being taken away from people that truly care about them. It is often the case that people who show unusual interest in kids are pedophiles but is that a bad thing? Pedophiles can be a VERY positive force in the life of a child. Society does not think so and wonders why pedophiles must add the sexual element. They ask why we cannot always be happy just doing things with them that are non-sexual. The reason is that is one very important aspect of life and one that is something we find very pleasurable when it is with the people we like and love. It is no different than you! If I have sex with an 11 year old girl I love and care about, why do you care if she is willing and loves me too? The trouble is, society assumes that she is incapable of loving, or understanding it. She IS capable-she loves her parents, which is one kind of love. I am only showing her another kind that she is gladly and voluntarily experiencing with me. You must accept that she IS capable of wanting sex and relief, and feeling LOVE for me-her pedophile. You can bet that if I were in such a situation, I would love her-not just use her. It is not merely sexual. I prefer young girls. I do not cruise the streets looking for them to molest! If it happens it does and that is fine.

Pedophiles do not talk down to kids & treat them with respect and listen to them. This is not the case with an average adult, and kids see right through it. Kids like pedophiles very much, whom they do not see as a heavy-handed authority figure, but rather, as a sort of "older" PEER. That is what confuses the general public about the motivations and methods of pedophiles. Society assumes the pedophile views the child as an object, and uses his/her superior smarts/abilities/experience to control the child to extract sex. But pedophiles do not do this and never advocate such tactics! It goes against their very nature to do that! The reason society falls for this assumption is it is "transferring" what IT would do if in that situation. Since "regular" adults do not really respect or understand children, they assume the same mindset applies to pedophiles-and it does not! A "regular" adult does not understand pedophilia or pedophiles, & so they assume the pedophile is approaching the situation as a "regular" adult with a perverted streak in them-bent on taking advantage of children-since that is what the average "regular" adult could see himself/herself doing if they were sex maniacs looking for an easy outlet to prey on. But pedophiles are not this way-we are not predators looking for targets! Being a pedophile is a way of life-not a sick perversion.

Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels. Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the “loser,” and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round. I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment. When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3×5 card reading, “Please use this M&M for breeding purposes.” This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this “grant money.” I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion. There can be only one.

Pissed?

heheh!

try again

I know you can do better, try again.

It's ok, you can try again next time

...

this injection of edge is actually the chemotherapy against migrants we could use right now

good on you, OP i guess

It's ok, I already won.

lol

Hello Alkaizer, this is Hollywood director and producer Eddy Pasterino. We would like you and fowtini to star in our new movie: Naked Skorñorita. You will go the the inn and see fowtini lying in Leah’s bed and she will want your Skorn but you say “No Skornerrino” and topdeck her. Pls no hastalapasta baberino.

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Reported.

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First of all, let me say I am NOT a crazed, apocalyptic lunatic who doesn't know what he's talking about. I have done thousands of hours of research on the topics and claims I am about to discuss. I have put countless hours of cross reference into these claims, and can back them up with numerous citations if requested to do so. I will keep this as short as possible for every tldr person out there. One more thing : pay EXTREMELY close attention to all of the dates.

Everyone knows about the Titanic, right? Yes, but not everyone knows about her two sister ships, the Britannic, and the Olympic. You may just think of the Titanic as a horrible disaster that killed two-thirds of those on board – and only know about it to that extent. But there is much more to the story than that.

There were to be three grand ships : First, the Olympic, then, the Titanic, and finally, the Britannic (some claimed it was going to be the Gigantic, no evidence). The most luxurious ships ever built. The owner of the ships was the White Star Line, which was owned by IMM, headed by the eponymous J.P. Morgan, born April 17, 1837, died March 31, 1913, March 31 the 4 year anniversary of the beginning of the building of the Titanic and April 17 being the EXACT DATE, if everything went according to plan, the Titanic's safe arrival in New York City in 1912. It was said that he wanted to make money off of insurance policies by switching the two ships and deliberately sinking the "Titanic," because the Olympic had been significantly damaged in a collision September 20, 1911 with the HMS Hawke, and was beyond its moneymaking stage. There are numerous pieces of evidence to support this.

Let's look at Olympic : she had her maiden voyage on June 14, 1911. She was almost identical to what Titanic would be, except for a few minor differences, most unnoticeable to the naked eye. If, in fact, a switch and insurance scam took place – which would not only have saved the company, but also killed many opponents of J.P. Morgan – then the ship that hit the fateful iceberg on April 14, 1912, and sunk on April 15, 1912, would have been the Olympic, which also means that the ship found by Dr. Robert Ballard in 1985 was the Olympic as well. Which means that :

The day of the Olympic's maiden voyage was to share its date with the birth day of Donald Trump; the sinking date was the VERY DAY notorious leader Kim Jong Il, father of current radical North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un, was born; and the day that its wreck was discovered? – the 46th anniversary of the beginning of World War II.

In one more chilling addition, the other sister ship, Britannic, sunk also, in even less time than Titanic, when she hit an underwater mine. The date? November 21, one day after what was to be RFK'S assassination, one day before what was to be JFK'S.

You be the judge.

Why am I getting a Malaysian Mike vibe from this shill Anyone else?

projection, try again.

Kek likes the darnedest things.

Wait a minute, are you saying…this… this is someone attacking us?

what a wacky guy

Hopefully you sickos end up in Trump's summer camp.

Great quality pepe my friend

This shit's awesome because it keeps SJW and other assorted shitlibs out of here.

Alright, seems like the fun is over.

Y-you too.

Wouldn't surprise me. The enemies of Holla Forums just can't stop helping us. It would be funny if it weren't so… well, no, it actually is pretty damn funny.

You faggots have inspired me to visit Holla Forums again.

Try again

do you think it'll survive?

Reported.