Holla Forums cooking #1

We often focus on things like literature or philosophy when thinking about Western civilizations. We focus too often on the high but not enough on the low, the mundane, the every-day.

That ends now. Today, we inaugurate the Holla Forums cooking thread! We will study cultures far and wide to understand the origins and beauty of our peoples' cuisine.

We start with Coq au Vin.
An older recipe reputed to date back to the time of Julius Caesar, this dish traditionally called for older and more weathered chickens with lots of connective tissue to dissolve. Slower growing chickens are ideal, though really any commercial chicken will do these days.

It is, effectively, a butchered chicken or two (or three) braised in a wine and herb bath with the hardiest products of the land: onions or late fall mushrooms (Chanterelles or Morels), and stored wine (Brandy or Port).

This is important. Other cultures made austere dishes for their winter, when they had true winters, or kept on business as usual. The European (French) Coq au Vin is different, however. This dish, unlike so many celebratory recipes, relies on preparation and planning for lean times in order to reach its peak.

Stored wine as brandy or port, old chickens that are unlikely to survive winter, late autumn mushrooms, and hardy aromatics are all indicative of this ethos.

Share your recipes, your discoveries, your learning in the culinary arts! They are a part of our culture and should be cherished. Let's make Holla Forums cooking a thing, let's make this a staple, a mainstay of our board culture.

We celebrate the literature and philosophy, so why not the mundane stuff? Food porn, appropriately described and placed in context, belongs on Holla Forums

This is a nice idea, but don't be surprised when the thread gets anchored for not being politics.

I would recommend everyone read the SS guide to feasts and holidays.

"The Celebrations in the Life of the SS Family"
>>>/pdfs/4312

Appreciated, but with enough food porn, we won't be anchored.

I have to upload a ton of pics but I have a goddamn cookbook's worth on my phone. Beautiful pictures of paella, sous vide roasts, thick Italian-American "gravy", indulgent brunches, and amazing "Ludwigsosse" from wild mushrooms used to garnish all manner of things.

We DO have a culinary tradition and it plays into our politics.

This has special merit and thanks for posting it! Normally, my culinary excess is done for family gatherings and it's astonishing. It's part of who we are- every man or woman can become a Michelin-starred chef for the sake of family and togetherness.

The meme about love making cooking taste better is true.

Where do you think you are? Food is for the lucky.

Yeah, this. But since I like the idea:

Pulled Pork:
1 pork butt roast
Apple cider vinegar
1 - 2 tsp red pepper flakes
2 - 3 drops liquid smoke
1 - 2 tbsp salt
Sandwich rolls
Cole slaw (recipe to follow)

Throw the motherfuckin pork butt in a big old stew pan. Pour enough apple cider vinegar so that there's about a half-inch standing in the bottom of the pan. Add red pepper flakes to the vinegar (I like to use 2 packets left over from the pizza parlor). Last of all, CAREFULLY add 2 - 3 drops of liquid smoke—DO NOT overdo it, as liquid smoke is a strong flavoring and can be completely overpowering. Put a lid on it and cook over low heat for 6 - 8 hours, turning the roast over occasionally and breaking it up into chunks in the last few hours. It's done when you can shred it with a fork.

Cole Slaw:
1/2 cabbage, shredded and chopped fine
1 cup mayonnaise
3 tbs white vinegar
3-5 tbs white sugar depending on how sweet you want it
Salt and pepper to taste

Mix the mayonnaise, vinegar, sugar, and salt and pepper together in a large bowl and whip it with a fork until it goes from curdled to smooth again. Fold in the cabbage and mix until it's all coated. Serve as a side or add a small amount directly to your pulled pork sandwich. If desired, double the sauce and add 1/4 red cabbage and a shredded carrot to the mix.

Vinegar & pepper based pulled pork. Someone's doing it N.C. (i.e. the correct) style. I gave up 16 years of being a vegetarian for that.

Every man should own a smoker. The jerky is delicious and lasts, perfect in the case of a major happening.

Hash Browns with Eggs:
1 bag frozen country-style hash browns, or 3 - 4 small russet potatoes cut into small, even-sized chunks
Salt and pepper
Garlic powder
Paprika or chili powder
Cumin
6 eggs
3 tbs cooking oil

Heat the cooking oil in a frying pan to medium heat or 350 degrees in an electric skillet. Add the potatoes in an even layer and sprinkle the top with salt, pepper, paprika, and garlic powder. Cook for approximately 8 minutes WITHOUT STIRRING OR TURNING. After 8 minutes, test around the edge to see of the potatoes are browning. Carefully turn the potatoes, trying to keep them together as a sheet as much as possible. If you can keep them together in 4 quarters you done good. Crack open the eggs onto the top of the potatoes. Salt and pepper the entire pan then carefully sprinkle cumin over each of the eggs—BE CAREFUL with the cumin because it's a strong flavor that can be overwhelming. Cover and cook for another 8 minutes. If you want softer eggs, cook the second side if the potatoes alone for a while and add the eggs later in the process. Good, hot, cheap.

Add onion and/or bell pepper to the potatoes if desired. Sometimes I'll throw some pre-cooked Jimmy Dean sausage patties on top when making a last-minute breakfast for the kids—don't use raw ones though, they won't cook right.

Men are reduced to being forced to live in apartments now. It's difficult to own anything useful.

I really want to live somewhere /comfy/, fuck.

I bet that's you Otto.

Have you considered buying a condo? Look around your area, if you live outside of a city it should have a similar cost per month.

I pay a small fortune to live like this

Why are you stuck in student accommodation?

Will be trying these, anons

The Netherlands is hell. The waiting list for an affordable place to rent here is years long. I get to skip to the top of the list because I need a private home for legitimate medical reasons, and the waiting list is more than a year long for people like me who have this exception. It's beyond absurd. I am so fucking hateful of humanity. I share a kitchen with five goddamn degenerates and live in a miniscule student room because fucking muslims and socialism.

Interesting thread, OP.

My two cents

It's becoming less and less common for people to know how to cook. Or instead of knowing how to cook, people learn one or two 'dishes'. This is not the way home cooking should be approached.

Home cooking should first and foremost be about taking what is available to you and using it for your maximum nutritional benefit. A person does not become a good cook by learning a few fancy dishes to impress friends, but from planning meals in such a way that fruits don't go uneaten - the lettuce is not wilted (or if it is, it is used) and a good cook uses what they have on hand to plot their way forward while finding new ways to eat well and make it tasty. It is to this end that western cooking techniques arose, as a people's tradition of keeping house.

Lets get this out of the way quickly, list of best foodstuff by category and type.

Getting your own land and build on it isn't even that hard. Believe me, it's cheaper than you'd think. Men used to build things and subside for their own needs. Now they've been trained to be dependent.

and as well.
add some corned beef in the mix. It's pretty fatty, so it's going to char while cooking.
I used to do what the Hash Browns with Eggs user was doing, but with Corned Beef, you can bake it after the potatoes have browned reasonably. Less frying, less oil intake.

Plus, with this method, you can cook the eggs to work perfectly with the mix, with any way you prefer eggs cooked. Poached are excellent. Any food that's known as breakfast, but can be enjoyed for any meal is the deal.

Cooking is a great skill, anyone that doesn't know how to cook at a basic level at least is failing.


Why aren't you cooking, Holla Forums?

I'm a cook at Perkins if that means anything

Frikadeller, aka Danish meatballs

500g mixed ground pork/veal meat (or just one of them, but mixed is best)
2 eggs
1dl milk
1-2 onion(s), grated or very finely chopped
2dl of flour
salt
pepper

Mix meat with eggs,milk and onion
keep mixing, add flour little by little
season with salt and pepper
keep mixing for a few minutes until as uniform as possible
Chill in fridge for at least 30 minutes
Use a spoon to place globs of mix on pan
Fry at medium-high heat until golden brown on both sides

Serve with boiled potatoes and parsley sauce or brown gravy, and pickled beetroot. For summer, serve with cold potato salad.

Freezes well, can be used to stretch available meat (just increase milk and flour), muslim-proof if pork is used.
For gluten free just replace flour with a slightly larger amount of rolled oats.

I haven't had a meal that was prepared by someone else in years.
I'll admit a bit of that is due to paranoia but at least all my meals are tasty as fuck

why is everything you eat red? are you a commie?

How well do you figure that would do as the crust of a scotch egg?

enjoy your vCJD/CJD/BSE/PrP/Botulism

Everyone to OP's house! Nom, nom, nom.

Bumping for good idea. I saved a few infographics in the past that I tried and worked well. There's a couple of decent channels on Jewtube as well.

I'd agree but it really depends on what country/ part of the country you're in. Some of the land around my area is expensive as fuck, especially anything pre-built.

That looks damn good, Im gonna give that a try.

Towards this end I would like to suggest some good basic recipes that I use a lot.

Omlettes and scrambles - you can put almost any kind of vegetable or fruit in with an omlette and it will taste great. Eggs are a great source of protein and choline, both of which are essential. Eat em. I make these with spinach a lot because they have lots of magnesium and the American diet is especially deficient in magnesium.

Oatmeal and grits - to be prepared sweet or savory, provides complex carbs in the mornings for lots of slow burning energy! Don't eat granola or cereals with sugars processed in - real oats are always better.

Bibimbap - whatever is in the fridge served over rice with a tasty dressing. The Koreans do this. Very useful and open ended dish, I am still convinced there must be some kind of western equivalent, some western name for this.

Soups - broths made from food scraps, vegetable cuttings, and bones. The advantage of a soup is that it can be made with little to no effort by simply simmering some water and leaving it, stirring occasionally. Slow cookers make this easy.

Fruits, cheeses, crackers, cookies and tea - all good things to be taken together when you have them, as a small indulgence when reading or doing something passive (ie reading). A tea hobby or the appreciation of good cheese is a much better alternative to eating junk food.

Steak, fish, and chicken grilled over a flame is honestly one of the best ways to eat meat, and you should consider grilling your meats as much as you can instead of frying them. Baking and boiling, while acceptable will not retain flavor as well.

No idea, never made scotch eggs.
I guess it can be used, try it and report back.

This. My ex's food was some of the best shit I've ever tasted.
Also, when I cooked for her, I did very well.
When you're cooking for someone other than yourself, food becomes like magic.

I love feeding my pigeons. There's two wild pigeons that live in my building and I put out food for them every day. At first it was just some bird seed and they were happy enough, but ever since I looked up what seeds and nuts pigeons like and put together a mix of it myself for them, they get visibly excited whenever they see me. It's really fulfilling.

Roasted Chicken Provençal is one of my absolute favorites.

Also anything that includes fennal seed, basil, and mushrooms is usually god tier.

Hey, if you don't like it, move to America.

polite sage for not politics, but any other anons want to discuss beer and wine? I've always wanted to see the taste of my fellow Holla Forumsacks and shills.

Will do, now I'm going to ask you to try something that sounds fucking disgusting but that is actually pretty damn good.
Bananas benedict.
Wrap bananas in thick cut black forest ham, slather with hollandaise sauce and pop in the oven for 15-20 minutes at 350 degrees fahrenheit.

user it's my dream to have a plot of land somewhere near Milwaukee and live the RedLetterMedia dream. Perhaps someday soon.

cum on burger

Begone wretched simpleton

The last wine I had was pic related, it was interesting. I've never had a cheese wine before.
Beer? I like Guinness.
Currently drinking Knob Creek though.

If anyone's interested, /webm/ has a pretty good foodporn/recipe thread going on >>>/webm/8214

Lots of simple ones, though there are some that are more complex. Most of them look pretty good, even if beetus-inducing. Not a lot of it looks terribly healthy, but maybe it'll inspire your or give you an idea to build off of.

(checked)

Do you like Mont-Redon CdP? I can't stand Knob Creek, prefer canadian blends but I've always had pleb taste in whiskey. Last wine I had was pic related, it was fairly good for it's price, strangely enough it was less oaky than the five year.

Currently drinking Coors Banquet, needed a break from my homebrew.

that's like the malmo of america

It's heaven