Alien.Covenant.2017.1080p.BluRay.x264-SPARKS

Alien.Covenant.2017.1080p.BluRay.x264-SPARKS

Lmao who cares

was better than Prometheus but still pretty meh
6/10

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I saw it three times in the theater. Going to wait for the blu-ray honestly.

The cast managed to act dumber than the characters in Prometheus. How was it better? Because they all die?

I love Ridley Scott's movies.

They have the BEST BLACKED scenes.

they didn't really, characters making bad decisions is part of horror in general, and even part of the first Alien

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It's part of bad horror that stops being scary when suspension of disbelief is gone because the cast act like pod people and make the dumbest mistakes.

The brilliance of Alien is that the crew did everything they possibly could right when faced with such a threat and still lost. That's what makes it scary. This piece of shit made me burst out laughing when the dumb bitch slipped on the pool of blood.

Fassbender was the only good thing in this movie.

the entire premise of Alien is people making a series of bad decisions, if that triggers you, you can't enjoy the original film either

Should be the other way around - Ridley is the one fucking over the xenomorphs.

I still don't understand why walter lost to david when he was clearly superior in martial arts plus he was an advanced model with better robotics inside. Losing 1 hand doesn't mean shit when he could've punched a hole straight through david's face.

Walter's ability to create was limited. He's actually inferior to David in that way, so David probably out-smarted him.

don't try to defend lazy writing or pass off "creativeness" as a viable form of martial arts. What, he invended being faster or stronger?

it's just ridley's plot holes

What bad decisions? The only real poor decision was to give the tracker to a hysterical woman who spooked Dallas into rushing right into the xeno.

I could go on and on. This is a standard trope of Alien.

are you retarded? you do realize strategy making is a big part of winning battles right and that requires creativity?

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No you stupid fucking nigger. If you have 500 fighting styles in your robot brain it doesn't matter if your opponent is running like his hands behind his back like naruto or charching up some creative ball of bullshit, you're gonna wreck his stupid robot ass.

umm they had no choice here as I remember
it was Corporation ship, their arms division had knowledge of that particular aggressive alien species being on that planet and intentionally decided to sacrifice whole crew just get a sample. Android was working on that plan all along.

They had a choice, they could have continued to their planned destination and colonized that planet. It was the Christcuck captain that decided he was going to go exploring the goldylock planet that mysteriously appeared out of nowhere.

Also, the dumbfucks landed on an alien planet without any protective gear and naturally ended up inhaling an alien pathogen.

he's talking about Alien not Alien Covenant

Ripely also wanted to freeze Kaine and follow quarantine protocol. She was ranking officer while Dallas was away. Dallas, Kaine and the hysterical bitch only got back on the ship because Ash disobeyed Ripely let the away party back on the ship. Ash was on orders from the company to get a sample of the alien at all costs. Dallas took the party down to the planet because of the same company orders, he wasn't privy to all the information Ash had. Alien has held up this long because the plot is fairly tight and the crew was very believable.

Compare it to Covenant, where the captain follows along with David after seeing him "talk" with an alien in the same room one of his crew members was killed, and the obediently puts his head over an egg when promoted by the clearly unhinged android.

Covenant had the characters acting like such fucking idiots I couldn't believe this shit actually got into production.

(checked)
BUt dude weed lmao, it has james franco in it, and everyone's other favourite actor, james franco's friend!

it should be david's hand

If dubs Scott will turn his clogs up before he can do more damage

They should have made Prometheus 2 instead, David, the engineers and what happened to Shaw were the only interesting parts about this film. The colonists are so fucking bland that I can't give a shit about them. Shit, even the super brief prologue with Weyland was better than anything after. Prometheus was a good film trying to get out of a shitty franchise that should have ended with the third film. This wasn't even a good film weighted down by its roots but interesting fragments buried in a pile of self referential shit. If the third prequel film starts with another fucking generic crew investigating a mystery only to meet a xenomorph I swear to God…

George Lucas would have made it entirely about new stuff, people would have whined about it a lot but it would have sold tickets and more importantly it would be fresh. A trilogy all about robots, ancient aliens and galactic mysteries with a bit of pihisopher raptor thrown in would have been great. The worst part is that the visuals and aesthetics of both this flick and kino in disguise Prometheus was great. What a waste. In this one they even did the airlock thing at the end.

Prometheus should not have been set in the Alien universe.
It is thanks to Prometheus that del Toro won't do his adaptation of At the Mountains of Madness.

It really shouldn't. While placing it in the Alien universe is not a terrible thing by itself it keeps the films in the old formula that Alien established and that is truly awful territory.

Kaine did the same thing, retard

Seeing this in the theater was a riot

Kane was exploring an unknown area on his own, and he was wearing his helmet.

Who could be behind this post?

someone who has watched a horror movie before?

>building a colony on said mysterious place you didn't even know existed
>^do #3 after discovering that there are savages there, and settling right next to them anyway
I could go on and on. This is a standard trope of Amerliens.

I like how Ripley in Aliens doesn't use head protection despite knowing about the facehuggers.

ie: stupid

What a kike.

OK, I'll bite - who else should they send down with him? Dallas? Lambert?

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Yeah, wtf is up with that? Always buy your kinos.

smh tbh

You can thank a thousand tasteless nerds REEEEing about muh xenomorph, muh (AvP) canon, muh plotholes for that.

Why do neckbeard nerds ruin everything? Fucking faggot ass critics.

Because neckbeards are in search of the same wonder and enjoyment they had in their youth (which isn't a bad thing in of itself) but want to achive that through repetition of prior forms and lash out over all manner of shit like the fucking manchildren they are.

you probably think the peanuts lodged in shit are worth eating too.
are you retarded?
the trappings of the 'franchise' arent what made that movie bad. its the only reason anyone even bothered to go see it and they know it. Thats why they did it in the first place. It would have been a bland boring retarded movie that no one would have remembered or talked about. The movie was bad because no one wants to see supposedly highly qualified and trained spacefarers do stupid shit for 2 hours and all die because of it.

alien covenant made ALL the same mistakes the first movie did and somehow managed to be even more boring. It was painfully predictable too. If you already saw alien then you knew exactly how this one would end up as soon as le stronk female lead rared her forgettable face.

Only someone born in the last 15 years who has seen nothing of worth could possibly pretend either of these movies were "ok"

I think the youtube """critics""" are mainly responsible for that, they always have such inane complaints and have this autistical obsession with films but they suck at everything related to film. They can't criticise audio design, cinematography, the script or whatever if it's not amateur tier but they need to find something to rant about in their hour long videos and also something to do unfunny skits about.

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movie was good though, I love that some of you fags think that everything is going to be a circle jerk about how every new movie sucks, when wow, a lot of people actually enjoyed it because we're not autists obsessed with what autists complain about instead of things like cinematography, score, etc.

exactly. This right motherfucking here. Even when they tried to copy this part, they did it badly, when neo-ripley warns the religious guy about the planet. She had no fucking way to know, But still, she shouldnt have been the only one to be suspicious of a random transmission. But then to send almost EVERYONE including the fucking captain down to a planet you have no information about, AND THEN, to fucking go without bio suits at all. just walking all around, not one drone sent out to survey. i mean.. my god the stupidity.

The ONLY believable part was when the chick was freaking out, because women. But seriously, dont they still stress test people before they are allowed in space? How do you completely fuck up that badly. also how does the medical officer not have a keycard or something to open the door from either side?

at least we got to see that dumb bitch burning.

no, it wasnt. i've listed my reasons it was bad. you'll need to actually make a point when defending your position.
a lot of ppl enjoy getting cucked. Doesnt make it good. ad populum isnt a valid argument
we are discussing the plot, if you want to discuss that, post pics & links and we would. leave those goalposts be for now.

KEK
it was boring and washed out. nothing about it was unique or had vision
no one is disputing that. It was how they died and how stupidly they went about making that happen. try reading once in a while.

perhaps you two should run along back to reddit where you can quip for upboats and dont actually have to read what ur replying to. you seem more suited for that sorta discourse. your inability to use critical thinking skills may explain why such shitty movies didnt offend your taste.
thats you, thats how stupid you sound.

This tbh

This is cancer. But in Prometheus the writer even made a point to pander to your autistic ass by pointing out stuff like how taking off your helmet is kind of dangerous and how they took air samples. You haven't said a single thing about the actual film besides that. This is the modern generation, this is millennials, the film was bad because the characters didn't just leave when they heard a creepy sound but went to investigate. Good luck getting kino made when the youngsters all have tism thanks to the fluoride in the water.

Someone who watches movies

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Del Toro is a fucktard who can't do shit he got dropped from the Hobbit and from Beauty and the Beast

You know I'm right, the only criticism I've seen of Prometheus here is youtube fatso who works at walmart and tries to cynically pick apart movies in his spare time tier.

Del Taco tweet about hatred of white males.jpg

Thank god that faggot Franco died in the first scene!

Who here is watching because of Kenny f'n Powers taking on the ayylmaos!?

What the fuck is up with the gal? She's ugly as sin.

go back to Holla Forums faggot, this is the kino board

I suppose one of the reasons Fox thought was the cause of Prometheus not topping the box office was that Shaw was too pretty.

I agree. They watch this shit on youtube and them repeat it like a parrot. One bitch I know did this and she didn't even watch the movie. Her opinions can right from Jewtube and tried talking to me like she was actually informed, when all she saw was some autist trying to nitpick it for clicks.

Spoilers below:

When the spacecraft first landed on that planet I thought what if the local vegetation gave off poisonous spores. Why aren't they wearing any protective equipment or ruling that factor out somehow before they went exploring?

And then a few minutes passed and troublesome spores appeared.

Stupid movie.

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Is it still bait if it's true?

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Eh, I do that too. What's so unbelievable about that?

5/10 at best

your mom doesnt count.

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the fact you think this is bait says volumes about how socially inept you are

I don't know why everyone is criticizing this movie. It was the best comedy film so far this year.
Genius.
Shit was like something from the golden era of Laurel and Hardy.
What could go wrong?
The best part IMO, why the fuck didn't the christcuck captain kill him right then and there? What, did Jesus tell him in a vision to trust David, because #YOLO?
10/10, the last time I saw an audience laughing this much at a non comedy movie was during the third hobbit.

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I feel bad for you if the only grill you talk to is your mom, user.

There's a very simple issue: Modern audiences are in many cases both unable and unwilling to suspend their disbelief because they're poisoned by postmodern meta-commentary and self-deprecating irony.
Even if they had 100% autistic adherence to biosafety protocols either somebody would have to screw up or some equipment would need to fail. Because a film in the Alien universe does involve body horror and fear of infection/parasitism somewhere.
Except you'd still get some professional nerd (or 300lbs Walmart cart pusher) on youtube nitpicking how this AKSHUALLY should never happend and the movie is shit and has plotholes and isn't scientifically accurate and the francise should've been handed to Blomkamp yaddayaddayadda.

If you want a vision of the future, imagine Joss Whedon making films full of postirony and meta humour like Cabin in the Woods - forever.

This is a pretty terrifying prospect tbh.

It was worse than Prometheus though.

I only shitpost with them. Anything else is boring.

Hence why they hated the Star Wars prequels. Which were good for what it was, a tragic space-opera.

Get the fuck outta here with that shit.
The characters in Prometheus did not behave like scientists or even grownups – they acted like insufferable assholes and amateurs.

There is no excuse for this shit writing. The first two Alien films did it right.
Ridley has grown old and senile, and he is ruining his legacy, as well as the legacy of the Alien films.

I like how "suspension of disbelief" was coined by Coleridge used to mean to be able to accept a world where fantastical elements and fictional races and environments which exist that don't in our world, but now it means "just turn your brain off" by brainlets such as yourself in order to excuse shitty.
The fact that capeshit, startshit, Nolan films and Transformers are massively popular completely disproves your hypothesis that modern audiences are autistic nitpickers when those films are what you describe.

*shitty writing

I feel bad for you if you talk to women and think they are capable of properly discussing anything.

When you go from "its real" 80s wrestling to 90s and then hit the complete garbage that is 2000 on in movie form, yes audiences are unable to suspend their disbelief.

is it really that hard to believe that the movies are bad because the writing was predictable and flawed? you're reaching into the ether for meaning when the answer is down here on the ground.

AKSHUALLY the alien could never go that fast and big without food.
AKSHUALLY the trilobite could never go that fast and big without food.

Remind me which one of those happend again?
Also lmao at you for getting your hot opinions from goons on youtube.

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Kaine was also a greedy wannabe treasure hunter

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This guy is without a doubt the biggest hack in Hollywood.

Didn't help in the first film. Also, even if it did it'd probably just impregnate her ass instead.

It didn't help in Prometheus either - one of the retards, either the biologist or geologist, got his helmet melted by the penis cobra.

I wouldn't say so, despite his mystery box writing which he learned from JJ he can actually write pretty compelling stuff. In Prometheus I'd say it actually worked in his favour, some mysteries are better left unexplained.

There are hatechanners who liked Prometheus

Too bad he/they decided to ruin the biggest mystery of all then.

Like why a scientists/corporate funding/ship would travel light years to an unexplored planet CUZ MUH CAVE DRAWINGS & I BELIEVE

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Stephen King is a hack. With that said the prequel route was the least interesting aspect of Prometheus, as already stated. It could easily have stood on its own two legs.

However, the engineer wasn't really a big deal or a mystery. The answer to what it was and stuff didn't have potential to be terribly interesting but Prometheus did a pretty good job at making it interesting.

King might be a hack, but he is nowhere near Lindelof/Scott level.

The only selling point of Prometheus was the connection to the Alien films. If it was a completely original idea it would probably not have been made, or if it had, it would not have that kind of budget or cast.

Prometheus only did a pretty good job at ruining the mystery of the space jockey and damaging the impact and legacy of the original film and Aliens.

Wow, you figured that out yourself?
Being a good kino. The only flaw it has is that there will never be a director's cut

lol, no

there probably already is one, it's just not released to the public

it's not surprising because Prometheus and Alien Covenant were good movies

This is pretty good actually. Too bad Lost ended up with timetravel, being purgatory and a load of other bollocks. That's what happens when you have to write from episode to episode without a clue where you're going. If you disregard the big arc it's actually a very well written show though.

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You do realize that they have an android character in the movie that purposefully wants to infect these people. They could have had the characters act sensibly and still have David compromise their quarantine. The movie blew it's load way too early and killed all suspense.

What a shitsow this movie was. Did David even want to get on the ship? If he had those facehugger embryos inside him, why did he need to infect the captain with the egg? I see no other reason than to pander to fans. I'm supposed to believe that David is this super intelligent robot but when he gets thousands of new test subjects delivered to his front door so he can continue on his mission to destroy the human race, he just does everything he can to not get on the ship. David could have been buddy buddy with the crew, helped them get off the rock and been on his merry way to a colony where he could tinker all he wanted. But no, better just get everyone to think I'm insane and evil and then try to get on the ship by pretending to be the robot I wanted to be my partner in crime. How was he even going to get on the ship if the alien killed everyone and crashed the rescue craft? I guess that didn't matter now that he had created his perfect organism or something.

Why did he crash the alien ship so far from the city by the way? We're supposed to believe that he could fly it all the way from another planet, deliver a payload and then just not know how to land it so he spun out of control into the forest? Was that the only ship in this ayylmao city? If it was still functional, why was David even on the planet anymore if he'd finished everything?

But by far the worst part were the fucking colonists. First of all it is a terrible idea to send out a crew made up of couples. You're gonna get relationship drama, conflicts of interest, favoritism and people being distracted from their work. All of the things you don't want in a spaceship crew that is responsible for thousands of lives Second of all there are too fucking many of them to build up anyones character to care about them before they're killed horribly. So all I see are soulless puppets getting introduced and killed off. Even the ones with some character building are so one dimensional it hurts.

The whole thing felt disjointed, like people who made it just threw around some ideas about what scenes they wanted to see in the movie and then smashed them together in a rather random order, wishing for something good to come out.

It's physically impossible for someone who liked Prometheus to Like Covenant, because Covenant, like Alien 3 to Aliens, shits all over what came before. So I know you're a shitposter.

such a qt pa2t

I hope scott casts a short haired girl for the next one too

i liked this opening scene

Looks like a fucking man, kill yourself.

Holy shit, really glad I didn't fall for the shilling of this trash.

DIVERSITY IS OUR STRENTGH, GOY! WYPIPO AIN'T NOTHING WITHOUT US POC!

I'm really looking forward to the inevitable race wars of the future, at this point I don't even care if whites lose, because even if whites lose and we're wiped out, the niggers and the spics will lose as well. They'll have to live in massive slums just like Africa, India, and China. Multiculturalism is truly the most evil lie of all time.

I like how the religious captain who whined about "discrimination" (typical conservashit) proved to be utterly brainless, unreliable, & easily tricked. Now that's realism.

I liked both. Fuck off.

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The Fermi paradox or Fermi's paradox, named after Enrico Fermi, is the apparent contradiction between high estimates of the probability of the existence of extraterrestrial civilizations, such as in the Drake equation, and the lack of evidence for such civilizations.

projecting your homo tendencies, user?

Just saw this and I cant believe how fucking retarded everyone was, I didnt care for a single character especially the main one who rubbed me the wrong way the first few seconds. What an absolute shitshow, promotheus is a fucking masterpiece compared to this crap

It's legit the worst alien movie ever made. And I don't mean the Alien franchise, I mean it's the worst movie to ever have aliens of any kind in it.

it was probably the most tumblr friendly mess i've ever witnessed. I was hoping it would just be regular bad like prometheus.. i'd watch it, make fun of it and go about my day.

Unfortunately that "movie" left a stain on my soul from how predictable boring and underwhelming it was. It didnt do anything good cinema should do, its the sorta film a studio does to extend the life on an IP license. Only the budget was clearly too extravagant for that.

I think their plan is to set the bar low. To just keep making these terrible fucking female lead atrocities and the regressives will keep defending them until an entire generation or two are raised on it and dont know any better.

california can't fall into the ocean soon enough.

How did Elizabeth Shaw die?

Where did David's ship full of poisonous shit come from?

WTF?

It was one of the Engineer ships from the Prometheus planet.

The real question is why the Engineers would leave that planet and those ships untouched for thousands of years.

David infected her, experimented on her and ultimately killed her.
Shaw and David flew off in another ship from the planet Prometheus was set on.

Same for the derelict in Alien.

You retarded?

alt-reddit kiddie detected

I couldn't make it past breakdancing bullet proof ayyy, I was already in stitches with the monkey ayyy and pilot blowing herself and the lander up.

Good thing I didn't watch it in theatre I would have laughed my ass off.

>Distributed by 20th Century Fox