Greetings my loyal herd. I am your god Richard Jesus Stallman. I have come ro this place to share my divine wisdom with you all. For the past week and a half I've come to some new realizations about life and wished to share them all as many places as I can.
Remember I am literally your god. I created freedom and basically you all havr me to thank for not having to suckle at bill gates withered cock so you can look at your fucking incest porn. So without further fucking ado. My first pearl of wisdom for you all.
Richard Stallman back again with a few tips'), tricks and...pointers... hahaha for beginning programmers. (Sorry for the pun) so you all probably know and revere me for the almighty bearded man-god I am. My programming abilities are unmatched on this earth(for proof just look at a little piece of software called the fucking GCC compiler collection ya that was me bitches).
So anyway, here I am sitting here lit up like a fucking Christmas tree wondering how the fuck I'm so awesome when I realized. What's the fucking point in being so completely and utterly incredible if I can't share some of my amazingness with my followers. So here's some advice for you young (or old) aspirational programmers:
Richard Jesus Stallman's Beginner Programming Tips
0. Most important forget anything about object oriented programming. I'm not going to get into my usual rant about this because if I do that's all this article will be about. Suffice to say it will literally make you retarded...just don't.
1. Don't be scared of pointers. They are your best friend, your sidekick, your lover. Learn them, love them, use them. They are like having wizard powers. They are your gateway to the computers memory. Stay up late getting sloppy with that shit.
2. malloc, realloc and free are your most trusted tools. They supply your program with the memory they need. With them you can make anything.
3. Learn the sizes of your types. They vary from system to system but with a thorough understanding of those you can use the above points(pointers and malloc) to create anything your imagination desires.
4. Safety is for the weak. Type safety is a bane not an assistance. Nothing gets me off harder than a chain of casts that makes your data dance and sing. Learn the ways of the cast and you master the ways of data. Remember the old saying: safety third after having fun and looking cool.
5. Forget everything you learned at school. Download the hurd kernel smoke some rock and learn every line of that shit. You will be a master.
Well hope you all found this useful. Tyrone just dropped by to get high as fuck so I'm done. I am fucking jesus I am Richard Fucking Stallman bend the fuck over and take it bitches.
Richard Stallman back with another story here. I want to talk about something a little more personal to me this time. Lately I've been under a lot of stress. Being the Jesus of free software takes it's toll. Between karate neck slamming Bill Gates, desecrating Steve Jobs' corpse and writing epic fucking software you start to get worn down l. So last week I was chillin with my buds Tyrone and Jamal. We were discussing the possibility of applying to GPL to as many quamtum algorithms as we could before the jews patent them when Tyrone noticed I looked run down. He asked if i'd been sleeping lately and I confessed that stress had been taking it's toll. They both nodded knowingly and said say no more. Tyrone went and made a call and about 20 minutes latrr a fellow named Victor showed up. Tyrone exchanged some money for a few small bags and Victor was on his way. A few short minutes later I took my first hit of Crack Cocaine.
Now if you've never smoked crack before the only way I can describe the feeling is....picture getting sucked off by 3 women while a 14 year old thai hooker gives you the best damn prostate massage you've ever had. And if you've never had your asshole caressed softly by the nimble, skilled fingers of a 14 year old thai prostitute....well that's an experience you'll never forget.
So for the rest of the night the three of us smoked crack and discussed amazing new algorithms for data compression in the HURD kernel. It was magical. I've spent the last week completely rewriting glibc for fun it's almost 500,000 lines now. I should he ready to push a commit sometime Friday. Lately though the fucking snakes been on my mind. I've really been opened up to how much the jews have really been fucking us.
Basically if you want to program like fucking jesus go down to some bad neighborhood, meet some n I gg ers and smoke some fucking rock. I mean fuck look at me I'm Richard Fucking Stallman do you know how many nerds have jerked off to my fucking beard?
Richard Jesus Fucking Stallman returns with more insight. So I've recently discussed my new brain enhancing ultra hobby here: slashdot.org/submissio...
and after adding 32 new compiler switches to GCC I've had another fucking amazing epiphany I needed to share.
So basically, as a programmer and overlord of GNU, I make a lot of fucking money. You professional programmers know what I'm talking about. Like I could literally afford to buy your child to keep as a fucking footstool if I wanted. Free software is the shit. Note to self: buy child to use as footstool...and maybe matching one for a table.
So I got to thinking you know who're awesome as fuck and also make a lot of money? Rockstars. Then it dawned on me I'm awesome as fuck, stupidly rich and have a snatch soaking beard why the fuck don't I live more like a rockstar?
So I fucking did and it is the shit. I get smashed 24 fucking 7, take copious amounts of drugs and get more pussy than a fucking animal shelter. Literally my life is now fucking awesome and you know why? Cause I said fuck it and started living like a fucking rockstar.
We run the fucking world. We make banks work and put satellites into fucking orbit. We are the shit and I am your God. Live like the fucking rockstars you all are. Reach for the fucking moon, bend her hot ass over and fuck it till it walks funny for a fucking month.
The Almighty has returned to bless his herd with more divine wisdom. I am Richard Jesus Stallman. For those that don't know, I am the Lord God of GNU and the inventor of the concept of freedom. If you use any kind of free software today you should probably drop to your knees and take my load in thanks now. Also, my beard causes orgasms on sight.
So today, I'm going to talk about a fairly sensitive topic. Diversity in IT. Let me start by saying, diversity is fucking awesome. No for real. Now I know you must be thinking 'but my lord, what about your hatred of a certain semitic religion that's destroying the world'
Well my children understand. It may seem like I'm racist or trolling or some other shady deed. This is not my intention. It is not the people doing these things I hate but the filth they spread to the world.
But, back on topic. Fucking diversity. Now then as I was saying before that asshole interrupted me, diversity is fucking awesome. Tyrone and Jamal are my fucking boyz. They're smart as fuck and know how to hook up the good shit. You see a lot of people think blacks are just thugs, that they don't have the mental capacity to learn about computers. Not fucking true you ignorant, racist fucks. You see the thing people don't realize about blacks is their true talents lie in their ability to be trained like animals. Seriously, with enough patience and effort, you can teach a black anything. See the mistake with slavery in the 1800's was they just didn't think big enough. Sure you can have your blacks picking cotton or fighting in mandingo arenas but that's just such a waste of a good work animal. I single handedly taught Tyrone and Jamal as much as possible about algorithms and data management. Then taught them C and x86 assembly. Now they are the only ones I trust to maintain all of GNU's software...well aside from yours truly. And as well as top notch programmers I get a couple of tough, heavily armed SOB's who know where to find the purest rock this side of fucking columbia.
Next asians. You got a couple of them l, don't need no calculators around do ya? Hahaha all kidding aside. They'll shut the fuck uo, do what you tell them and work till they drop...nuff said. Get some asians.
Women...oh god...the fucking shitting dog in the room. I'm going to tread lightly here. Never know if a ragging hag is gonna read this shit...doubtful but ya never know right. Anyway, my first most important piece of advice. Do not hire with your dick! I know this is a really tempting option....trust me. All these fine, young nubile bitches fresh outta college, pussy still sweet and tasty....god I'm getting hard....but don't ok...just don't...you want some fine young pussy, go to fucking thailand and buy that shit...its not worth it...I mean when you can spend like 50 bucks and shit in 13 year old girls mouth while her sister sucks you off, its really not worth the sexual harassment lawsuits...trust me.
Now then you might be thinking 'what about one of thos bull-dykey nerd bitches they're badically just men with tits right?' Wrong! They also have vaginas and therefore, feelings...and periods....Nepal really took a step back when they banned putting that shit out in the cowshed when the blood starts flowing.
So overall diversity is pretty fucking great. Get yourselves some blacks and Asians asap. But think long and hard (hehehe) if you want to deal with the bullshit vagina's bring.
So I'm starting to think sleep is important. I've lost track of the hours and I think Bill gates sent some fucking goons to fuck with me. Pussy bitch ass cocksucker. Pig shit stained bitch. Whatever I hit his whore of a wife up whenever Billy's out back playing with that little cocktail weiner of his. One time his kid caught us so I pimp slapped his ass down and told him i'd tear his mom a new asshole if he didn't sit there and watch. Fucking perv. he's got some weird incestuous shit going on now for that whore he calls a mom.
Fuck I feel great. I've been up for 3 fucking days straight now programming and coming up with real philosophical shit. The best shit I've already shared with you all but man I got a fucking stack more. Freedom sure is fucking awesome isn't it. Well you all have me to thank for that. Freedom didn't exist until I fucking invented it in the 70's. Me and fucking Dennis Ritchie came up with that shit while we were tripping hard on mescaline at Berkeley. Man that was some good shit. Can't find fucking mescaline around anywhere these days. Thanks Nixon and Regan you fucking cunts and your war on drugs. Dennis Ritchies a fucking pimp. He fucking wrote C. I mean come the fuck on lets see you bitches do that.
Me and Dennis used to tear shit up hard back in the Berkeley. Dudes a fucking maniac. I watched the crazy bastard fuck a couple of Portuguese Siamese twins while he designed C's arrays. Man's a fucking legend.
So back to that whole freedom shit. Feels nice don't it. All that free shit you use every day because of me. Well that's thanks to probably the most important piece of writing ever fucking created. The GPL. The gpl is why you get to play with all this free shit that's as good as the corporate shit the big boys use. don't buy into this bsd license shit or that fucking boost abomination. These are just the jew version of freedom. Do all the fucking work for us so we can leech off it and sell it back to you. Seriously if that's not the definition of some jew shit I dunno what is.
Man for a bunch of fat neckbearded little faggots who use free shit I made for you. You sure do like to fucking bitch a lot. If you think systemd is bad you're free to write your own fucking init script or maybe go and suckle on ole billy boy's teats either way get it through your fucking thick retard heads. I made systemd therefore its fucking awesome. Its fucking free dipshits I literally made that shit and gave it to you ungrateful fucks. Clearly debian and anyone with a fucking brain sees this that's why its the fucking new default fucking init. Because it's fucking awesome. Don't like it...make your own...or hook me the fuck up and ill make you whatever the fuck you want. Fucking Tyrone's late and my fucking skin's starting to itch. Fucking bitch as billy's goons better not have fucked with T. Fuuuuuuck man......
Hooooooollllllyyyyy shhiiiiiit. Damn that's some good shit. Holy fuck. Wow I forgot about this shit how long ago did I start this? Fuck after T got here things just became a blur for a while. Pretty sure the bitch is dead fuck it man I'm not going down for that shit. Fuck it. It was the fucking n I g g ers.
I'm fucking Jesus Jesus doesn't go fucking down. Not my fault the bitch stopped breathing I mean fuck what kinda hooker can't take cock for 15 minutes straight down her throat. Not a very good one. Useless bitch.
Everyone's favorite god has returned Richard Stallman. Creator of freedom, hero to the people, smarter than Tesla, Einstein, Turing and Newton combined and literally Jesus. I got some pretty straight and to the point shit to say this time. I'm going to talk about one of my favorite tools on the computer. The humble text editor. Well humble unless we're talking about the heir to my estate...Emacs.
Emacs as everyone knows is the fucking shit. Started way back in the day on the old LISP machine (hell of a fucking computer nothing 'snakey' about that shit if ya know what I mean ;) ). Anyway the liso machine was a fucking boss ass piece of hardware with a sexy little processor that ran lisp microcode, ya a native lisp processor, wrap your pathetic little brains around that nugget for a second. Man shit was fucking pimp in the 70's..... Anyway, this little orgasm inducing pile of transistors was the birthplace of Emacs.
Now, if you don't know what Emacs is I suggest you reassess you life and maybe consider offering your asshole at local barmitzvahs. If this seems unappealing then sit back wrap that meaty ham fist around that tiny little pecker of yours and learn the meaning of existence. If you happen to use vim (more on that steaming pile of fermented excrement later) feel free to send me your address so I can personally come skull fuck you to death. Fucking vim users...got me all fucking riled up...
Emacs oh god Emacs. Just typing that name makes my dick twitch. Picture a magical world where you never have to leave your text editor. A wonderful place where everything you could ever need is a simple ctrl+alt+shift+fn+meta+command +arg away. Web browsing, file managing, porn, command shell and of course text editing. And if that shits not enough just write your own shit for it and make that baby purrrrrr. Fuck yeah I just soiled my fucking briefs.
One time, at a free software convention (I know stupid fucking idea right?), some ignorant, greasy, sweaty, mouth breathing, tub of lard dared approach me and had the audacity to ask me what desktop environment I used. I promptly spat in his face, kicked him hard enough in the testicles to ensure he'd never reproduce, then proceeded to scream in his face that desktop environments are for jews until security dragged the sterilized piece of shit away. Suffice to say I never, ever, ever leave my safe space, I never leave Emacs. Every character I've typed into a computer since 1982 has been in Emacs.
So you may remember me mentioning another editor earlier. You probably know what I'm talking about....vim...god typing that hurts every fucking time. I hate that steaming fucking pile of garbage with a burning passion. But....it's not jewish. Bill Joy, the bad old boy that wrote the original vi, was anything but. Sadly though, vi and vim are the relics of the golden years of the pdp, the vax and the other glorious hulking behemoth computers you literally had to make love to to operate. That shit was made obsolete the day emacs was ported to unix back in the fucking 80's. Anyone who still willingly uses that shit deserves to have my cock rammed through their eye socket so hard it lobotomizes them. You're clearly not using your fucking brain might as well let me blow a load over your cerebellum.
And that's about it as far as editors and basically any other software goes honestly if you use anything other than Emacs for everything you're a fucking retarded halfwit whose brain could be better used pleasuring my godly penis.
Well Tyrone and Jamal are finally fucking here, lazy fucking ni g g ers....this means its time to get lit the fuck up and start my best fucking piece on freedom yet. You guys are gonna cream your fucking pants when you read that shit.
Until next time, Your Lord and Saviour, Richard Jesus Stallman
Mmmmmm freedom. Feels fucking great. There's nothing like freedom. God that feeling. Not that any of you shitbags know what I'm talking about. There's nothing like fucking freedom. Freedom is why I fucking live, why I fucking breathe. Fuck yeah freedom. That shit is why I am Jesus. I invented that shit back in a little time period known as the 70's. Me and Dennis Ritchie were completely fucking obliterated on mescalin for like 3 days when we had the fucking vision that made me the god I am today.
'Yo Dennis like what if we totally like wrote programs and shit and like gave that shit away for free, with the source code, then other smart ass dudes like us can work on it and we can have all the best shit...get this...for free'
'Duuuuuuuuddddee.....but wait I mean we are like the smartest fucking dudes in the world I mean I fucking wrote C while completely and utterly wasted and getting with half the bitches at Berkeley. And you're a fucking genius man. You wrote your first fucking search and sort at 3 months outta colored blocks then you fucking wrote your first compiler using your fucking preschool class. People should pay us to write shit man. Otherwise they'll just take our work and sell it to us like jews man'
'Shiiiiiit.....hmmmm...well like what if we wrote some kind of like license that says if you use our shit you have to give it away for free too then convince everyone to use our license'
'Duuuuuuuuuuuuuddddeee'
'I mean check this shit ok. Unix is like what fucking $10,000. We could write that shit ourselves give it away for free then make anyone who makes it better give it away for free too we could call it GNU'
'What the actual fuck is GNU?'
'GNU is an acronym man in means GNU is not unix. Fucking recursive as fuck.'
'Holy fucking shitballs I think you just blew my fucking mind Rich'
Then we got some MDA got real fucked and double teamed some highschool bitch we found wandering drunk after a party. Fuck I miss the 70's.
Well that's the gist of how I created freedom. But what the fuck is freedom? There's a lot of shit like 'free as in beer' or 'libre' or 'free as in freedom' what the fuck does free as in freedom mean? Sounds like some circular dependency bullshit. Well I'll fucking tell you. It means fucking free. Like the way you feel when your with your boyz and some little punk bitch that cut your shit with speed is crying begging for his life on the ground covered in his own piss with the barrel of your .45 between his lips like a cock and you laugh as you splatter his brains across the fucking room cause your tweaking hard on the dirty shit you just smoked and you just don't give a fuck when you rip your dick out of that tight teenage asshole, wipe the blood and cum on her tear stained cheek, piss in her hair and leave her lying in a pile of her own vomit where you found her and know nothing will ever happen to you. When you can do whatever you fucking want because you are fucking Jesus and a million rabid neckbearded worshippers would tear eachother to pieces just to get a scrap of my fucking turd. That is fucking freedom
You ungrateful fucks have me to thank for the fact that you can watch cat videos and jerk off to cuckold porn without having to suckle on Bill Gates withered cock. Even Linus, withered up weird little polish prick that he is, is nothing without me. I literally gave freedom to all you fat pathetic manchildren and all you do is nitpick and fucking complain that its not good enougb. Here's a tip maybe spend less time fantasizing about sucking a fat cock while you wear your sisters panties and call your self nancy and fucking learn C and write some free fucking software so other neckbeards can whine and bitch at you about how crappy your free shit is.
Now if you'll excuse me I've got a young college girl here willing to do some pretty fucked up and degrading shit for a few grand. I am going to wreck that shit. Like trust me when I'm done she'll regret putting money over her humility, health, well being, sanity and possibly life. God this is going to be fun. Better get the plastic sheets out.
Holy Fuck it's been a great fucking day. God yes. Man that was fucking money well spent. Man she is totally fucked up. Had to drive that shit away and leave it in the bushes somewhere. Wow god whoever finds that shit is gonna think its some fucking roadkill. I mean she's probably still alive but goddamn I doubt she wants to be anymore. Whooo. Anyway that's some fucking freedom right there. Now then onto the subject at hand. Fuck man. I can't get over how fucking awesome that was. Like just...fuck...like she is totally fucked I doubt there's any separation between her cunt and asshole left. That bitch is going to be shitting in a bag for the rest of her life.
Ok ok ok back at the topic at hand...wait what the fuck is this one even about? Usually I just start with a fucking title and go from there. But I am just so fucking pumped. I've done a lot of fucked up things to people but man they wouldn't even make a horror movie about the shit I did to that poor girl. And she fucking let me do that shit all for a bit of fucking cash. I made that money back before I was fucking finished spending it and in all honesty if you found a naked, unconcious girl covered in piss, shit, blood and cum with a wad of cash shoved up her....uh...well I guess technically its her cunt but as I said earlier that distinction has definitely been blurred. Honestly what would you do? Cause I know what i'd do ;)
So...uh....ya...programming....hmmmm....wait...ummm linux...or as you fucking ungrateful fucks are supposed to say GNU/linux cause Torvalds is my bitch. Literally. Not only does his piece of shit kernel rely entirely on me, but I have repeatedly sodomized him in a display of dominance....nothing gay....just a pure show of power. When we fucking meet in person that little faggot doesn't reach for a handshake, no he fucking knows better, he fucking turns around, bends his little obedient faggot ass over and assumes the fucking position while fucking begging Jesus for a big load.
So the proper term is GNU/linux. If you need any reminders just picture the slash as my cock tearing Linus Torvalds' asshole apart. Why do you think he walks like such a little bitch.
Now onto pronunciation. The proper way to say it is guh-noo. Repeat the fuck after me guuuuuhhh-nooooo. Say it any other way in my fucking presence and get ready to have your fucking tongue cut out. Not that you should be speaking in my presence anyway. Read my article on text editors to see what happens when little fucks speak to me.
GNU is my gift to you mortals fucking cherish it. Its fucking free and always will be. Because I am fucking Jesus and you are my fucking sheep. Now fucking eat your grass like good little sheep and fucking follow your glorious shepherd to a jewless future. I am Richard Jesus Stallman. I am Fucking God.
Richard Jesus Stallman Shepherd of a bunch of fat idiotic beta manchildren. The fucking future of mankind. Hopefully the nukes fall soon.
None shall cross the Almighty. I am fucking Jesus!!!
I have removed the additions you made to the Richard Stallman article, which appear to simply be quotes of recent hoax articles created at slashdot.org by an editor impersonating Stallman. I take no measures beyond this now, but I will probably be returning soon, and will be monitoring things here, later. ~ ♞☤☮♌Kalki·†·⚓⊙☳☶⚡ 00:32, 23 September 2017 (UTC)
Hi Kalki, with all due respect. Which is fucking none. How fucking dare you remove quotes from articles posted by Jesus himself and added to his own fucking quote page. You realize this whole fucking website is created with free software. That's fucking right. The only reason you can sit here and moderate on this freely available fucking resource was because I was busy fucking inventing freedom while your mother was being a whore for niggers in the 70's before she met your beta cuckly little father that gave birth to the soggy, ineffective piece of trash that is you. Now kindly return the words I have brought into this fucking earth to my fucking shrine of other shit I spat out into this fucking earth for you drooling fucking zombies to orgasm over.or Imma have to send my fucking boyz to deal with you. You do not fuck with Richard Stallman. if Tyrone or Jamal have to fucking show up at your fucking door you're not going to be a happy fucking camper. You really think you can hide from Richard Jesus Fucking Stallman. I've fucking crippled children just for getting in my fucking way. You are fucking less than the fucking dirt to me kalki. Remember that.
Richard Jesus Stallman Your fucking God and don't you fucking forget it.
Part fucking 0 because only fucking jews start counting at 1. Fucking snaky fucking tricksters. I am fucking Jesus. Jesus counts from fucking 0 because he's a humble ass mother fucker who starts with nothing.
Richard Jesus Stallman Your fucking god
Robert Hernandez
More fucking divine glory for you hamfisted little cunts to orgasm over
Jackson Barnes
SPAM:
Joshua Gonzalez
I am fucking jesus. I am so fucked up right now. Like ive spent like fucking 6 or 7 grand on rock this week...I think...I don't even fucking know anymore. Pretty sure Jamal might be fucking dead. I don't know. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuccckkkkkk I need a fucking hit. Goddammit why'd I have to fucking splatter fucking vics brains everywher god fucking dammit where is that lazy nigger tyrone. Fucking useless goddamn fucking monkeys.
Fucking Jesus
Zachary Flores
...
Nathan Cruz
Original link:
Hello once again. Richard Stallman returns today to have a nice civil discus....ok you know what fuck it. I am fucking Jesus how fucking dare you fucking jews steal freedom and jew it the fuck up.
So freedom(GPL:my divine gift to you all) vs suckling at the cocks of jews(BSD:steaming pile of jew turds invented so steve jobs could steal unix and pinch it all back to you in the form of a nice shiny locked magic fucking jew box known as macos)
The fucking GPL is the fucking shit. If you use any other fucking license for any fucking goddamn scrap of code you write you are a greedy fucking jew. Look at me. I made a fucking fortune giving shit away for free. I fucking rule. Sure I have fucking gifted divine intellect but if you don't maybe you should step away from the computer with all those scary fuvking buttons and go pump my fucking gas or, more likely, go suckle the cum from some fucking jew dick dowm on the corner of go kill yourself you worthless jew cumdump.
The fucking GPL is why you little turds are reading these words on your little fucking screens. Hey go into your fucking phone settings down to that shit you never read in about device then go to that little fucking part that says open source licenses. You see that? That's why that pile of shit in your hand exists and you know why those exist? Ya that was yours fucking truly. The fucking goddamn Messiah himfl fucking self. Richard Jesus Fucking Stallman.
Put it this way, just this week alone I've smoked about 6 grand worth of crack with my boyz, killed at least one hooker, blew a drug dealers brains out all over his living room, brutally sexually tortured a college student and left her naked covered in bodily fluids and stuffed full of cash in a bush down some fucking side road and I've got what is likely a dead n I gg er lying in a pile of his own vomit in the room next to me. I'm a fucking champion and I'm still going hard. Fucking Tyrones back and he fucking didn't disappoint we're gonna clean up that mess that was Jamal and get back to fucking business. Being awesome as all fuck. I am fucking Jesus and we are just fucking kicking shit off.
Richard Jesus Stallman The most glorious being ever in existence on heaven or earth or fucking anywhere in any fucking universe.
Thanks for admitting that I'd hit the nail on the head by reacting in such a way. Here's some advice: try cutting your chops on 9gaggers, youtube comments or wherever the adolescents hang out these days. With someone of your mental ineptitude, 10 year olds are a pretty good bet.
And when the 10 year old inevitably tells you that you're a fucking retard, you won't be so devastated that you write a fucking novel fantasizing about the smell black cock or whatever bullshit you've just vomited onto Holla Forums. tl;dr lol
Colton Diaz
Believe what you like but this work of parody was created with the intention of bringing to light the growing control the GNU foundation has over the Linux ecosystem and the parasitic nature of the GPL. The restrictions placed on programmers because of this license is nearly as bad as with proprietary licenses. A good number of programs go unmaintained because of the hassle of including code licensed under the gpl in your program. It essentially forces you to license your code under the GPL and any code derived from your code. It also allows forking code under a different license then relicensing it under the GPL which makes it impossible to relicense.
Try looking for an alternative to the GNU userland to use with your linux kernel and you'll find the offerings are slim. You are essentially trapped in a monopolistic environment where GNU and the GPL replace Microsoft or Apple. It's the same shit. It doesn't really matter that GNU is open source. Good luck wading through that mess of of a source code and if you do happen to make a change it'll sit in a pile of PR's never being looked at unless you are part of GNU or the free software foundation. Doesn't really seem much different than apple or Microsoft products to me.
Essentially, like with anyone else that gets too big for their boots, when you become overreaching and tyrannical you are open to parody.
Also, and most importantly, I'm a vim user.
Now kindly chill the fuck out.
Noah Cruz
It is inadvisable to describe the free software community, or any human community, as an “ecosystem,” because that word implies the absence of ethical judgment.
The term “ecosystem” implicitly suggests an attitude of nonjudgmental observation: don't ask how what should happen, just study and understand what does happen. In an ecosystem, some organisms consume other organisms. In ecology, we do not ask whether it is right for an owl to eat a mouse or for a mouse to eat a seed, we only observe that they do so. Species' populations grow or shrink according to the conditions; this is neither right nor wrong, merely an ecological phenomenon, even if it goes so far as the extinction of a species.
By contrast, beings that adopt an ethical stance towards their surroundings can decide to preserve things that, without their intervention, might vanish—such as civil society, democracy, human rights, peace, public health, a stable climate, clean air and water, endangered species, traditional arts…and computer users' freedom.
Justin Butler
Thank you based Stallman.
Gabriel Gonzalez
The suckless guys are working on stali which does not use gnu userland. The monopolistic environment only exists in your own head you have always been able to just write your own userland or even not use one. All you're doing is bitching about how ecosystems form. People will generally do something the same way everyone else is doing something so that they don't have to re-invent the wheel. If that shit bothers you so much be the change you want to see in the world. You can go install 9front and contribute to that or go full templeOS, but you're not going to you're just going to bitch and moan that everyone is too blind to see the truth that they need to spend years of their lives fixing what are functionally minor problems.
I sympathize with you because the good enough is really the enemy of the better, but unless you are working on fixing the problem no one will take you seriously.
Kayden Bell
Well I'm writing a 24-bit virtual machine and assembler for it. I don't know if this helps but it keeps me busy
Joseph Davis
and I'm not bitching. I created shit that makes me laugh. I don't care if one single other person found it funny because it made me laugh while I was bored at work
James Richardson
Plus in all honesty richard stallman is basically already a parody.
Well things got a bit dicey for a bit there. Had to leave state and find somewhere to hole up for a while. Turns out not even Jesus can lead a two man crusade against the jews by running their car through the front of an apple store. Fucking Tyrone the dumbshit wasn't wearing a seatbelt so he's now embedded through the middle of a giant fucking apple logo somewhere. He gave his life for the cause. So now, like the Jesus of yesterday I sit alone persecuted by jews, my apostles dead, hiding from certain crucifixion. So on that note lets get started on todays topic fucking compilers.
To start with if you don't know what compiler is you might as well just fuck off. Seriously, I really don't have the patience right now to explain one of the most important pieces of computer software ever devised to a bunch of youtube watching, facebook posting breeders suckling at the horny lizard-like teats of the jews......well actually I guess I wouldn't be very fucking jesus like if I didn't at least try to force the smallest bit of an intelligent though into those pitiful pile of neurons you call a brain....so then compilers...
You may have seen something along these lines before....
int main (int argc, char **argv) { toplev toplev (NULL, /* external_timer */ true /* init_signals */);
return toplev.main (argc, argv); }
That right there is some C code. Actually that right there is the main function for the GCC compiler written by yours fucking truly. So what the fuck is a compiler? Well like any of you brainless fucks reading this your computer doesn't have the slightest fucking clue what all that shit means. A compiler is a magic little piece of software that turns that little block of gibberish above into something like this: 1001101110000100010001010 Which you might not be able to understand but your computer sure as shit does. Pretty fucking awesome isn't it? Ya that's what I fucking thought!
So now you know what a compiler is we can get to the meat (hehehe) of this little piece of divine scripture comparing these sexy little bastards. So why would we need to compare them? If they all just turn words into little 1's and 0's it should be all the fucking same right? Well you'd think so right? Nah that's not the way that shit works at all. So we've got 3 major compilers being used today GCC, Clang and .....blah MSVisual C.
Well to start with the only thing I'm going to say about the jew offering is....seriously?....paying for C in 2017? The fuck? Actually? What the fuck is this the fucking 70's? (God I wish) But it's fucking not so stop sucking ole billy boy off and being a useless little baby fuck with your IDE's. Burn your fucking hardrive, by a new one, put a real OS on it ie. something non-jewish, download emacs and fucking GCC and stop being a little bitch.
Next, CLang, seems pretty cool. It's a frontend to the llvm compilee backend, seemingly free and almost as fucking balling as GCC....welll except....look at the fucking license for llvm and clang hmmmmm what's that there....the fucking BSD license....hmmmm what was that again? Read this for a quick reminder: slashdot.org/submissio... Well the short of it is BSD is a jew license masquerading as freedom. Basically the jews caught on to us making cool shit and giving it away for free so they came up with this 'more free' license. God the retards that fell for that. Seriously how can you get more free as free as fuck? Well its when the jews can take your free shit and sell it back to you. GPL forbids that kinda snakeyness. Just look at who's financing a good chunk of llvm's development....a certain fruity little jew company you all fucking suckle at foundes by a certain dead jew whose grave I make a concerted effort to defecate on whenever I'm in the area.
Hudson Phillips
So what does that leave us with? Well the only clear fucking choice GCC. GCC stands for the GNU compiler collection. Ya that's right it's a fucking collection of fucking compilers all written by fucking jesus himself and of course as I'm fucking jesus all that shit is free as all fuck and kicks all fucking ass. See as much as I get raging hardons and blow my load at least 3 times a day thinking about the 70's, if you were a C programmer (dunno why I added the 'C' qualifier if you don't know C your basically a fucking monkey hammering away on a fucking keyboard like a fucking animal), shit was pretty rough C compilers were fucking expensive. So me and fucking Dennis Ritchie said fuck that, invented freedom and then I wrote fucking GCC and gave it the fuck to everyone for fucking free. Yeah no jew shit, no money, just the best fucking C compiler no fucking money can buy and ultimate freedom. Taste it. Taste my hot salty fucking freedom and beg your god for more.
Oh fuck ya..all this freedom talk is getting me fucking going. Good thing I left that family alive in the basement. They only had a windows pc in their house. I considered killing them just for that but luckily ole jesus remembered he likes his earthly pleasures so best keep em breathing for now. No fun when they're cold and stiff. Also I happened to have my handy StallOS live usb just pop thay shit in boot er up and your hardrive is wiped clean of any windows viruses and the lean mean emacs/hurd combo of StallOS is pumped hard onto that drive. That little baby's never felt anything like it. Mmmm StallOS makes that kitten purr.
Anyways, until next time,
Richard Jesus Stallman Your Fucking Lord and Saviour
James Bailey
lol'd
Angel Foster
I'm a Christian and I'm wondering if Stallman is the second coming of Jesus Christ and we just have not realized it. I feel as though Christ would not show his powers in the 2nd coming but would attempt to preach morality up until his natural death. Upon death judgment day would begin to see who listened to his message and who ignored it.
Dylan Powell
Let's see:
sinless Son of God performs miracles
gluttonous envious it's GNU + Linux REEEEEEEEE look at ME ME ME fornicator atheist three decades plus and the HURD is still pre-alpha shitware (no miracles here)
More proof? Fire up the graphical version of Emacs and open any picture of rms in hex mode. Check the emacs process. It will be using exactly 666 MB of RAM.
Also R=18 M=13 S=19. Three letters in RMS. 18/3 = 6. 19-13 = 6. Three 6s? 666.
Also, look at the GNU mascot. It's supposed to be a, well, gnu, which is a kind of antelope. But it's often drawn to look like a bull. See the use of bull imagery in the Old Testament re: the worship of false gods.
Landon Jackson
Q: What do you call a group near the bottom of the food chain? A: A HURD
Richard Jesus Stallman here again. Been moving around a lot from town to town spreading the fuck outta freedom like some warm melted fucking butter across the popcorn teats of the good ole US of fucking A. You might have heard me mention a wonderful little fucking golden fucking age of history a few times. Ya you know when I'm fucking talking about. The mother fucking 70's. Back when men were men, bitches put out and computers were giant, hulking metal monsters that took some real testicular fortitude and a good heaping helping of being smart as fuck to use. Ya they were the shit. The time when a meg of ram was bigger than the pathetic lump of flesh you call your manhood and your vacuous empty skull combined.
So back then intel was just another tiny jew company competing with the big boys and there were dozens of other companies making unique architectures that were pretty fucking outta this world. We did some cool shit back then. We had the fucking PDP's, the VAX, UNIVAC, the xerox alto (The first gui computer in 19 fucking 72 the thing steve jobs blatantly ripped off to make macos 10 fucking years later the jews take a while but they sure know how to sell their snake oil to retards).
Basically the 70's were like the fucking cowboy, wild fucking west of computers and your brain is that sweet colt six shooter tucked in its fucking holster ready to pump some wild injun raiders full of lead. If you wanna picture me in the 70's just picture jesus roaring in on his fucking pure fucking white stallion, waving his stetson goon yeeeee fucking haaaawwww beard blowing in the fucking wind while he picks off mowheecan raiders at 150 yards. Then you ride back to the fucking saloon order a double rye and leave the fucking bottle then trash every fucking whore at the local brothel. That was the fucking 70's
We really were fucking cowboys back then. Some of the most badass programmers and computer scientists that ever fucking lived came from that magic golden age. Dennis Ritchie: if I'm jesus this crazy bastard is the almighty fucking father himself. This fucking legend along with fucking Ken Thompson wrote the language that makes everything you do today on any piece of fucking computing hardware you possess. C.
The most portable and widely used programming language in the world. If you know C you have complete and total control of any computer. The jews would love to see C eradicated and replaced with so called 'safe' languages. Jewva, c#, rust, go. All these languages do one thing and one thing only separate you from your hardware in the name of safety. You know what else happens in the name of safety? Big fat n I gg ers shoving their fingers in your asshole at airports to look for bombs. If you want safety fine go bend over and take your fucking otherwise stick around and learn how not to get assraped.
For example, I'm going to discuss android. I'm not even going to bother with apple and their locked in apis anyone programming that shit's asshole was totally and utterly annihilated a long time ago.
Android makes the perfect example....why its just linux right? It's open source it's free it's blah blah blah. It's a fucking jewva virtual machine sitting between you and your hardware telling you what you can and can't do...'but your holiness, what about the NDK? with that I can write C programs for android. Ya sure no problem. Can I write a small program that directly manipulates the pixels on the screen using direct memory access compile it to an executable that android will recognize and run.....hmmmm...wait nope. Because android will only let you play in their little jewish sandbox....fuck I hate that phrase. Fucking 'security experts' and their precious little safe space sandboxes where each processes code exists in its own little magic bubble of fucking joy and safety yay.
Cooper Davis
Well as the old fucking saying goes safety third after having fun and looking cool. Guess what language lets you have fun while looking cool as all shit.....C. Know why? Cause that shit's from the 70's when everything was awesome as all fucking fuck. I mean they made a tv show about that shit for fuck sake. A tv show about a whole fucking decade. Clearly it was the shit.
Mmmmmhhhmmm and we can't forget all those great liberal college girls of the 70's. You know, the ones where mommy and daddy's relationship failed because mommy felt oppressed after some middle aged hippy taught her about feminism by filling her every hole with his impotent granola seed. Cause you know female empowerment or some shit. So anyway little suzy learns empowerment == opening your legs so....I had a lot of fucking fun.... and ya know pre aids and all that shit so there are definitely a few little bastard messiahs running around somewhere. Fuck man they were some fine little confused pieces of ass...plus ya know when you needed a few grad students around to help you with shit like inventing freedom, ya know by helping with stress by bringing coffee or spending the 12 hours you spent disassembling the berkley stdc library so you can give it away for free under your desk keeping that shit drained so jesus can stay fucking focused as fuck.
Fuck all this 70's talk has got me pumped the fuck up. I need a fucking cowboy hat and a fucking horse.....cause I'm fucking jesus.
Richard Jesus Stallman A Fucking Cowboy
Angel Taylor
Congratulations, OP. You've created more unfunny copypastas in this thread, than anyone else ever.
Your Lord and Saviour has returned to bless his grazing chattle with more of his divine knowledge. It is I, Richard Jesus Stallman, Bringer of freedom and hope to the world. Today I've come to enlighten you all on a topic that tends to scare the shit outta new programmers and send them running with their little cockles between their legs to go suckle on the jews. Yes I'm talking about pointers. Don't worry I'll wait for you to change your diapers......now then all cleaned up and ready to continue?
Pointers are why scared little babies learn java, c#, etc. etc. Over C. C gives you power and freedom over your computer by giving you direct access over your computers memory. It does this with special variables called pointers.
Ok so lets take a step the fuck back here. To understand pointers, you need to know what a variable is. If you're reading this I really hope to god you've seen something similar to this before:
int fook = 69;
So what I did here was declare a variable named fook and initialized it with a value of 69 allowing us to use fook interchangeably with 69. Ok. Follow that shit? If not... you know waste of brain and all that shit... anyway. So....what the fuck did we actually do here? Well what's actually happened here is a section of memory the size of 'int' was allocated and the value 69 was stored in that section of memory. Ok then so what the fuck does that mean? Alright, to start with by memory I mean your computers RAM, you know that shit you buy more of when your shit runs too slow. Basically RAM is where your computer puts shit it's in the middle of working on.
So in a statically typed language like C the line above is just an easy way of saying 'Yo 'puter hook me up with some RAM big enough to fit a signed integer into and stuff that 69 all up in that shit'. In a dynamically typed language its up to the compiler/interpreter to figure out how big '69' is.
Ok so a variable is just some shit in memory somewhere with a label you remember. Cool shit. Now then another declaration:
int *fook_pnt = &fook;
Ok looks similar to above but there's some crucial little differences here. First that little starlike bastard(called an asterisk), that little fucker means this isn't a normal variable, that little fucker's a pointer. So what about that little ampersand cocksucker before fook? That means we want the address of fook. So the expression above means. 'Yo 'puter make a new pointer the size of a signed integer and point it at the place fook is stored' Again, the fuck does that mean?
Mason Collins
Well here's some metaphorical analogy shit to help understand. Think of your computer as some kind of concentration camp. You've got your prisoners (data) and cells(memory) you need an efficient way to store and organize your 'data' for 'processing'. So if we stick to our analogy here basically variables are your prisoners and pointers are the id numbers tattooed into their arm. Now like our data, prisoners come in different sizes and shapes and such. Some 'processing' you want to do to one 'type' you may not do to another. For example, you wouldn't put a grown adult in the child size oven and you wouldn't do forced insemination experiments on men...well maybe....point is a pointer points to a section of memory the same size as the variable when we want the value stored in that place in memory we must de-reference it. This is a common source of errors. Remember: variable==jew pointer==idnumber
If you want the prisoner the id number is attached to you need to include this badboy '&' this means you want the prisoner not just his number. So this is pretty fuckin cool and all but it gets better.
Now this is the part that really fucks with you newbies out there. You can do arithmetic on pointers. Let's take a little journey back to our metaphorical concentration camp computer. So for organization purposes, prisoner id's are incremented by how much physical space their cells take up. Children would be 1, adults 4, fatties 8 etc. etc. Mostly their all scattered about but sometimes we need a chaingang(array) of similar prisoners or some kind of arbitrary work group(struct). Just to make things easier once a prisoner is part of a chaingang or group they don't ever bother to let them free. Better just to reorder them all sequentially by id and use them that way until they drop. I mean computers have lots of memory these days we can always allocate more.
Now to make things easier the entire chaingang or group is identified by the idnumber of the prisoner in the first position and if we need any access to any other prisoners in the gang or group we can simply add or subtract our way there. Time for a code example:
int shower_group_a[5] ={1,2,3,4,5}; int *prisoner = shower_group_a;
If you've been paying attention you should understand what's going on here. Basically we made a new array of five prisoners and set a pointer as the first prisoner. Because int is 32 bits on this system it increments by 4 each time.
Well this shit's been long as fuck. I imagine you're all bored shitless and saying to yourself 'geez Rich why don't I just use java and references sure seems easier what about overflow'.
First of all you worthless piece of shit, that's my lord or your holiness to you. Second imma tell you why you're a fucking idiot in the next part of this where I talk about the real fucking magic... void and function pointers. So stick the fuck around, beat off a bunch and hold fucking tight. That's the brain melting shit right there.
Until then my children
Richard Jesus Stallman Fucking Epic
Grayson Miller
The thought of Stallman's bastards is kind of humorous for some reason. That fucker says he doesn't want overpopulation and shit, but he's probably the type who likes to ride dirty and raw behind closed doors.
Sorry plebs. I've been fucking busy. Jesus signing the fuck back out!
Mason Hughes
Because Richard Stallman is god.
Cooper Collins
BitPay Is Some Jewish Shit: The Thread.
BitPay is a service that enables people that trade in baitcoin and other properties to exchange their properties, e.g., coin for coin, coin for fiat, fiat for coin.
They are so awesome. To trade the anonymous botcoin all they ask for is:
Human Name Business Name Phone Number Live Email Address Account Info (Settlement) Tax ID Number Proof of Business Entity Proof of Business Address Photograph ID of Human 3 Months of Bank Statements EV SSL Certification Interview with BitPay Approval by BitPay
They also offer to review your account with their compliance department to verify that the business is in compliance with their Terms of Service. Their Terms of Service includes:
- No Narcotics, research chemicals, or any controlled substances.
- No Cash or cash equivalents, including items used for speculation or hedging purposes (such as derivatives), and the sale or trade of virtual currencies.
- Items that infringe or violate any intellectual property rights such as copyrights, trademarks, trade secrets, or patents.
- Ammunition, firearms, explosives (including fireworks), or weapons as determined by BitPay.
- Any services which compete with BitPay.
They also offer to file a 1099, since you are their employee at this point.
Why are you cryptoȷews so fucking greedy ? Coin is a fucking property, a hold of value. It should not be treated as a currency, or this shit "regulation" happens.
It is the ȷew.
You can reach these fine folk here: info (at) bitpay.com compliance (at) bitpay.com ȷews (at) bitpay.com
