How do i get laid

I am so fucking tired of jerking off. How do I get laid Holla Forums? I've tried tinder and bumble and all the apps. I work out every day and have a smoking body and a good face. I'm funny and charismatic… Im not 21 yet so I can't go to clubs or bars. What the fuck do i do?

Unfortunately you need to find a social activity. I used to endurance ride horses, and swam in pussy. Now, my balls are so fucking dry it hurts. I try to talk to girls in cafes, et cetera, and 99.9% leave empty-handed and full-scrotum'd feeling like a rapist. Find something to do, I dunno a fucking book club. Join an evening class or something.

buy a hooker you desperate faggot

You're funny? Make me laugh, funny man.

Only reasons I go outside are for work and a couple orchestras im in but like everyone is either too old or too young… inb4 no such thing as too young but i aint about to rape some children im not a degenerate

Just keep at it. Eventually something will catch and you'll know what works for you. In the mean time you're sharpening your skills for future encounters.

You work out but really girls don't care about that. Girls are attracted to social status. So take those muscles and become captain of the local sports team or something. Women choose men from the top of the dominance hierarchy.

There are many circles you can dominate. Best track star, you get the runner pussy. Best chess player, you get the librarian pussy. Like that. Be the best at something. Best coder, well you gotta go to code clubs so everybody can see you're the best.

The angst you are feeling is the energy behind every great invention, advancement, and achievement of mankind.

start by fucking off back to >>>/reddit/

You sound like a little bitch. No wonder chicks don't like you.

Go to hell normie loser. Just go to a bar and fuck any thot and get your "STI" card, it's so damn easy to get. Just don't come back here bitching about it. Don't come here saying it didnt change a god damn thing I'm getting sick of the bitching coming from shallow shits like. you.

What you wrote makes a lot of sense cause I was getting more pussy when I was skinny and popular than now. I sacrificed all my social status to focus on my music and i dont regret it for a second even though I miss the pussy. But being great is more important to me. I guess it will come with time.

rural Nevada.

Well the first question I gotta ask you then user is, "Are you trying?"

Are getting dates and just not getting laid on them?

Are you asking girls out?

Are you making moves on them when you get a chance?

Are you being "friend zoned" too much?

What seems to be the problem? I can't help you until you tell me.

When I was 16, me and my family went on a vacation to capecod, Some dude invited me to a bar I got really drunk, I french kissed a lesbian woman against her will, a bouncer asked for my ID all I had was an high school card from quebec, said I didn't have any, he asked how I got in the dumb ass never asked for it when I passed the door in front of him. He asked me to fallow him, I saw many american movie where the police bust into teenagers party and arrest them all, simply for drinking, I got kind of scare, as soon as I walked out the door, I sprinted away in the dark. They never heard from me again.

My point is go to Old Orchar beach, you'll find a bunch of quebecoise ready to get drunk and fuck, during their spring break.

Also I left without paying a dime.

You're not meant to reproduce.
So you'll never get laid.
It's that simple.


Work on achieving your goals and forget about pussy.
It's really that simple.
Leave reproducing to Chad's and Stacy's

This, Chads and stacys Breed where as men like us get rich off them. Thats how it is, thats the circle of life. If you REALLY want a kid to hand your wealth down to then just pay for one like I am doing.

buy a sexdoll idiot

have to chek my wizard quads again.

Learn to be a social butterfly. Even fatties can get laid if they are one. I did, a lot, 10 years ago. Now I'm looking better, have an actual well paying job, a fully paid house, a nice car yet, since I ostracized myself completely from all my social groups, I couldn't find my way towards a pussy now even if I had a neon-filled bridge showing me the way to one.

So, basically, get to know a lot of people, interact as much as possible with people and be outspoken. Shit will come naturally at that point.

But is it worth it in the end? Or would it be simpler to just pay for a kid of your own?

That's subjective. Some people like it, some don't, some get bored or tired of it. That's why I left that life of partying and crap like that. I honestly, genuinely prefer to stay at home alone reading, watching anime, playing games or studying work-related stuff. Maybe I'm just jaded, but frankly those interactions were so vapid I don't miss them a bit. Even the sex wasn't that good, not a lot of difference from that to a mid range escort.


What? A kid? What are you talking about? I thought OP just wanted to get laid.

Ya, he dose but I want to get laid and have a kid to pas down my wealth to.

Men need to be alpha, but women don't need to make effort, simply talking to people might be enough, even for the fat girl with a nose piercing and ugly nails, some desperate dude will fuck her.

Yes
Yes
Yes
No

I love female friends but I just don't get the respect I give them back.

thats why sex bots scare women

That's a completely different goal altogether. You don't need to find a cumdumpster, you need to find a good wife. But I guess the method is more or less the same - the bigger your social network, the more people you will get to know, which, in turn, makes it more likely for you to find a keeper. So work on being sociable, keep constant contact and strengthen your bonds with your friends and acquaintances (especially those who know a lot of people) and once you find a target, do your best to prioritize the social circle she belongs to.

Good luck with that, though. I can't remember fondly of any woman I dated. All turned out to be harpies, and if I had a kid with any of those, I would be paying alimony by now. Too bad there isn't a "finding a marriage material woman" formula out there.

So pay to have a kid, got it. Thats alot more simple with me. I think it's like 250k to have one so thats no problem, I make over that in a year.

You can get them for free in SE Asia, apparently?

Will it be my blood? I don't want to be a cuck.

try the Diaz method

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Marriage is not in the best interest of the man. There's no benefit for you at all. It's designed to lock men in for life.

A girlfriend you might keep for a few months, or a few years, but eventually she'll get old and fat and you will get sick of hearing her voice. Trade her in for a new model, and enjoy while it lasts, repeat.

What happens when you get sick of your wife? You signed a contract, fool. Now you're fucked. You think it's hard getting a girl, it's much harder to get rid of her when you're legally bound.

Remember folks, generally the most logical post in a thread will have little or no replies. I just gave the most logical post its first reply.

it doesn't matter how many replies it has. this isn't fucking reddit, and (you) does not = upvote you faggot

Tell me if doesn't solve OP's problem.

obviously it does, that's not the issue. you're being an elitist prick because you replied to the most straightforward answer. that makes you a faggot. feel free to go back to reddit, i'm sure there are people who love the smell of your farts just as much as you do

Ok man reading the tread I think I'm getting the picture.

I'm going to guess you not doing anything wrong per se, you are just missing a few pieces. Namely you aren't being assertive enough.

If you got no problem getting dates, do this on your next one. It sounds tricky but it's really easy once you get the hang of it.

1) Get her talking. Do this by asking questions about herself. But those are the only questions you ask her. As far as what you are doing, just tell her, don't ask.

Ask her stuff like "what kind of books do you like?" or "Have you ever been back east?" let her ramble if she wants and just keep asking followup questions. The idea is people love to talk about themselves so let her, it will make her feel more comfortable with you. You can compliment her as well here. Tell her the things you like, but be simple. "Your makeup is cute.", "I like that jacket.", "Wow, you seem really smart and cool" are all fine.

But everything else tell her what is happening don't ask. For example if you want to get something to eat say, "I'm hungry, let's get a pizza." not, "Are you hungry? Do you want to get a pizza?".

Do this and you show you are interested, but you are in charge. If she objects to something you can make another suggestion, "I thought everyone liked pizza. That's OK, I know a place that makes great chili, let's go there instead." See you aren't being impolite or domineering, you are being assertive.

2) Never give her any information unless she asks. Keep quiet. When she asks you something give her an answer and don't ramble. When she's asking you questions that means she is comfortable with you and you can now make your move.

3) Make her come to you as often as you can. This can be simply telling her, "come here." or as forceful as grabbing her by the belt loop and bringing her close to you. ALL WOMEN like this.

4) It doesn't matter what move you make as long as you are comfortable with it. Think of it like once you can tell she is relaxed you can do what you want (after you made her come to you) it's YOUR choice to kiss her or to skip the foreplay and just take her pants off.

(A quick note on the whole "No means yes" thing) If she says "no" but she isn't doing anything about it just keep going. If she squirms or tries to get away just stop for a second look her right in the eye and say "what's the problem?" you've now put the burden on her.

Whatever you do NEVER EVER APOLOGIZE FOR YOUR ACTIONS. Everything you are doing is within your right.

Now go out there and get laid!

Related

become a furry :D it gets kinky fast

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Not wrong. Just circlejerk in an irc for 3 months then meet one of them at a convention. Guaranteed to get laid.

Sounds like a voice of experience

Did you just make a really sensible post and then fuck up your own credibility by posting a tranny on a cereal box?
Yes, you did.

kek/10
I even smiled
Thanks user

someone noticed! my attention hunger is sated. I can now die happy.

>>>/fit/ and bitches will come to you

try your butt, its good

Furries are like 90% men.. Sounds like a great way to get sodomized tbqhwy. Keep your pseudobestiality faggots.

More like 50% men soy, 50% animal

This is pretty good advice not gonna lie. It matches up with what I've done when I was successful. I guess I have gotten a little soft recently. I especially agree with the never apologize.

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