Times you could have gotten laid

So what, is she no longer hot?

The only vagina I have ever seen was the one of my little sister. Was tasty tho'

Fucking awesome my nigger!

We're both happily married these days.

I think the other main reason why I didn't chase after her [she tried oh-so-hard to flirt with me back then, too!], is that we were all "Good Young Churchgoing Youth" in those days, fuck it!

There was one Church Youth event, at someone's pool… she'd ride about straddling my shoulders in the pool… and I had to try and stop myself from 1]. clogging the pool filter with my [edit], and 2]. going to jail for being a pedo.

Oh no no no no no

Newfag

GET OUT NORMALFAGS.

Nah nigga, nah.

I have to admit… since I saw her again, I have a secret fantasy… that she'd call me up, and pretend to be 14 again, and we'd meet in secret, and she'd be wearing the skimpy shit she used to back then, and we'd fuck like rabbits.
I'm ashamed of myself, as I honestly love my wife.

Uhh, that's normal. It's normal to act on it, and it's also normal to NOT act on it. I think you should NOT.

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE GET OUT

Talking like a nigger makes you a normie.

I'm sorry if missionary position sex with a legal-aged married spouse is unsettling or triggers you, faggot.

You don't belong here if you're not a incel virgin nerd geek otaku weeb NEET hikikomori basement dweller than you don't belong on image boards GET OUT NORMALFAG.

How fucking dare you sir, turn this into a house of depravity.

You do understand that you are like the 20% who get laid and the 10% who have a wife correct? Most of the men of the world are forever alone. Therefore we cannot relate or sympathize with you. Most of us will be forever alone and will only like or help like minded. This is why you are an outcast here and do not belong.

speak for yourself, user

This user is absolutely right.

no he is not. user is just a MGTOW faggot

Stay mad, because I don't care what you think. You have no effect on me anymore.

Eh, I'm not MGTOW or gay (which a lot of MGTOW are anyway, ironically enough…) but I'm definitely alone.

Those people chose to be virgins and are happy going their own way in life you're thinking of robots and incels.

If you're alone because you suffer from social anxiety and awkwardness, i can relate. Otherwise, you're just a pathetic loser.

I think Robots will be the spearhead in making wifubots.

Maybe my story about a time I could have gotten laid will help you.

I worked with a woman for a couple of years a long time ago. She was young, cute, and fit, and we enjoyed each other's company. For a time, we worked together on a project and I felt like there was an attraction there. I was married, and she was in a relationship for the first little while we worked together, so it never went anywhere. We kept things "professional."

Eventually, I took another job far away, and handed in my resignation at that job. On one of the last days I was going to be working there, and probably one of the last times we'd have seen each other, ever, she invited me over to her place (I'd never been before) so she could "say goodbye to me." I said I couldn't. She seemed sad, but she understood: I was married, and I didn't want to cheat on my wife.

My wife and I moved for my new job. Two years later, my wife started fucking other guys behind my back, and one day a few months after that, she drained our joint bank account (filled with money I had earned, as I was the only one working at the time) and moved all of her stuff (and some of my valuables) out of the house while I was at work.

As you can imagine, in retrospect I felt pretty dumb about having turned my coworker down.

Reported for normalfag shit.

...

Normalfags keep coming here from halfchan. They think its "cool" to hang out with us "losers".

nobody thinks that

That's what i don't understand why come here?? 4chan and Holla Forums are enemies for a reason and too why do normalfags think its cool to act like a social outcast nowadays?? that's so retarded.

Just go back.

It's because failchan turned PC so all the "kool kids klub" trolls got banned, now they are here thinking they are the shit but they fail at shitposting and having proxys.

...

Right now

stop being a lazy fuck.

...

Oh no! you showed me with your shitpost memes. GG man, you got me.

...

you are starting to become boring just like every normie becomes.

I'd love to tell my own wacky tale about how I almost fucked a lady about my mother's age on several occasions, but I can't because it's too depressing because she's still my friend and I have no others.

I've been laid though.

In high school I was at a friend's birthday party and found myself alone in the living room with his sister. We were talking when, out of nowhere, she sticks her tongue in my ear. I had no idea what to do. I just sat there for a minute while she licked my ear. Another friend came to the doorway and started cracking up. After a minute the sister got up and left the room. I didn't go after her. I just didn't know what to do.

Ok here is my most autistic moment.

cont….

...

...

green text story pls

this, people that are married or have a gf just come here to shitpost

Let's be honest, it wouldn't have gone anywhere anyway. And any girl who fucks on the first date ain't worth shit.

Living with the knowledge that I had such a perfect opportunity given to me in life and I threw it away makes me more depressed every day. She was cute too and not crazy. After she stopped trying to be my girlfriend she started dressing like a boy and turned from a cute girl into what looked like a tumblr. I probably destroyed her confidence and destroyed her chances at ever having a happy relationship, which makes me feel even more bad.

...

Less than 30% of high school romances ever work out after high school.

Well I had no experience knowing how to interact with girls because of my fuckup so now I'm a wageslave who doesn't leave the apartment except to go to work so my human interaction for any sort of relationship is at a dead end.

I think one of the most annoying things is the idea of asking someone out without knowing if they're single or not.

...

14-yo's know what they want… allegedly

No pedo tbh

GET OUT!!

One of the hottest girls in the school developed this fixation with me my last year of HS. I guess she just saw me as a challenge or wanted to spite all the other guys thirsting for her because no one in my 4 years there had ever gotten close to me even though I'm not bad looking. I've just always been a hermit like the transplanted Appalachian man I am. I knew what was up when she started getting close and decided it was ok to put her hands on me for no reason. Bear in mind that it was unusual for anyone to even talk to me, so I knew exactly what this bitch was doing. My rebukes and threats just seemed to encourage her. After graduation two dudes who had only associated with me once tried to drag me to a party where she was waiting to go down on me. Didn't go and only found out after in college when I ran into someone from my graduating class who told me the story. Honestly fuck that stupid broad no bitch is going to break me. I'm gonna be a wizard.

Wizard Class 1

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not today old friend

too bad the holidays already passed

what has that got to do with your virginity?

none afaik and im fat, ugly and autistic so whoever wants to be that close to me must be insane.

...

I have no words.

Think of all the people you come across. Your neighbor, your coworker, the guy who rings up your groceries, the UPS guy. Any one of them could be a rapist. They just havent been caught yet.

...

...

all men are rapists

Therefore all rapists are men

I love good circular logic.
It's what keeps the USA going.

I don't know how you wouldn't know what to do. There's missing signals, and then there's a girl sticking her tongue in your ear.

I rejected the 4/10 sperg girl of my class recently

Because she's an autist obviously, and she's unbearably cringy when she's around. I'd rather stay a virgin than touch this shit

Also she had like 7 bf before, who all abused her because she's so fucking dumb lel

that one sounds like it could last though she sounds crazy but if you want someone who is both crazy and dedicated..

sounds good to me

as close as i've got

this is what i get for coming here on mondays

I wish I had something to post here. I wish I could still give enough of a fuck to go off on some retarded flight of fancy and write some bullshit that sounds good but means nothing. But I am dead inside. There is nothing more I can scrape together to describe the sky queen. Even when I was arguing with myself I could come up with some pithy phrase to keep things going for years. For years and years and years I talked about her. There is nothing left in me. I talked with her friends. I talked with her family. I even once called Blockbuster Video CRAAAAWLEEEEEEEEEEEE ROAD and hung up. I can't even remember the names of most of the players. I can't remember which of the ones I remember were my sockpuppets. All I remember is that for a good part of ten years I loved you Olivia. Not the you you, but my image of you. You were alway 15 and perfect forever. Now you are old, broken, bitter, and very likely not attractive. It's funny you know. Even now as I profess to not care a still have a little day dream where I shave you from yourself and all your bad decisions. I know that would never happen. You are too jewy and will always fuck your own shit up and blame the men around you. Still I can have that day dream. After all there is no cracky, only the collective dream we have all been blessed enough to share. Well this was fun. This is the first time I have thought about you in two years.

I know how you feel user.