Party

17yo fag here, going to a senior party next week.
Gimme tips on how much to drink, who to talk to and how to get a one night stand.
I'm going with my mates, which one of them is also going to try to fix someone.

Just bring Weed

Ask your mates. Or quit being an autist. Or get the fuck off of here.

aryanfag here
speaking form personal regrets.

Don't drink. if you do, make it a very SMALL amount.

Take it from me, I threw the biggest party that our class of 1000 students ever saw in high school.

It's not like the movies where u buy the girl drinks and u get laid.

Who to talk to:
Make sure you talk keep in touch with someone that considers themselves high status, and then prove yourself more leet than them like a challenge, such as an awkward pickup line, or run through the house naked.

How to get one night stand?
It's most fun when there's a girl that's more of an outsider. find the stragglers and then get them alone. or if you want to hook up with a hot chick, prove to them that you are an oppurtunity to them and you know that all girls are the same but the hot one's aren't going to be putting out for just any guy, they put out for the baddest dudes and they make sure it is an absolute secret.

Just keep your composure and try to be the leader of your circle and socialize and make it fun…not just kids trying to act mature…the real kids are the ones that want to make out and fuck in the bathroom

...

You can handle far less alcohol than you think you can. If you see someone blacked out on the floor, roll them onto their stomach. Jerk off before you go, you might be able to last longer than 18 seconds that way. Cameras will be everywhere, so if you fuck up, be prepared for the evidence to last forever.

Have fun.

Drink heavily, Talk to the cop at the door when they show up. And the bedroom is where the night stands are. Try to get both if you have access to i pickup or hatchback. Bet way to get a night stand is to empty it out to make it lighter. Then just pick it up and leave as quickly as possible.

instead of faggot alcohol how about drugs? they're guaranteed to get you laid.
i recommend a safe but high dosage of opioids. trust me.

alcohol is a meme.

this. it works but weed is for niggers.

Take it from someone who has the wisdom that only comes from life experience. Don't go. Consider the following:
- you will most likely never see these people again. most people will graduate HS and move away, never to be seen or heard from again. Do you know how many friends from HS I still have a few decades later? One. And we were friends before HS. Look around at your fellow students and know that what they think of you doesn't matter and they don't matter to your life.
- any chick who will sleep with you after randomly meeting you at a party has done it before - alot. These are the women who will give you STIs. These are the women who are racemixing. These are the women who become the 30-and-single, wine-and-cats, degenerate tramps we all look on with pity. Feel bad for them, don't use them up like the rest of the mouthbreathers.
- If you're about to graduate HS, you need to focus on skills that will translate to your future life. Forget partying with a bunch of faggots who can't hold down a beer. There will be decades of fun parties when you're an adult. You're not going to miss out on parties but you will miss out on getting a head start in life.

DO NOT DO THIS
Police will look inside your house and then find anything they think gives them probable cause to come inside. You need to tell police they are tresspassing on private property but you'll be glad to speak with them on the sidewalk. Walk with them to the sidewalk and be nice but remain adamant that they have to stay on public streets if they want to talk with you.

not with teenage girls.

get out normalnigger

That's right. You'll be at parties with successful single women - who are way more fun and interesting to talk to and do stuff with than 16 year olds who sit around awkwardly gossiping and taking Instagram selfies every 30 seconds. The kind of teenagers you're partying with now will be the used up, shallow-brained skanks you'll hate in your 20's and 30's when you're trying to find good women. Protip: all the good women were studying and learning skills while you were chasing Stacies at some faggots house party trying to look cool.

used "single" moms.
dude
modern women do that too. but young girls are malleable because they're inexperienced.
and they won't be when you meet the "successful single women"
hahaha.
fucking some stacey slut in a one night stand who gives a shit? i compare it to the equivalent of binge eating. im going to have to contest your statement regarding that the "good women were studying and learning skills"

you do realize most women become whores when they go to college? 95% of women get fucked in college, take drugs, be retarded, everything. add that to the people that "good woman" will meet who'll steer her to a path of decadence. yes let's do drugs, smoke weed, haha party girl!

real good women are women you meet young and virginal. i say this because why would you settle for someone who will dream of a man that is not you? also the cum she absorbs into her body from her previous "suitors" is ingrained into her DNA, thereby making you a fucking massive cuck. good women are more of a product of accidental social failure than any amount of "studying and learning".

"Adult" women do this as well. The only difference is they have been filled with even more cum than the teenage ones have.

I'm not talking about meeting women in your 30+'s, I'm talking about your 20's. Very few women in their 20's are single moms, but if they are, stay far away.
This is how I know you hang out in retard circles. Only people who hang in room-temp IQ social circles complain about women being stupid. Protip: smart women hate stupid men - which is probably why you don't see them.
see above. retards do. smart women avoid retards - including retarded women
Not even close. There's actual data on this and iirc about 40% of college students report having zero sexual experience in college. Don't underestimate the number of christians and traditional girls. Also, you were just arguing "who cares if you fuck some random chick?" and then you turn around and complain that women are sleeping around? Don't be a fucking hypocryte faggot. If you want to play with the piggies, get used to the mud.

The shallow whore Stacies grow up to become those women. That's my point. Don't even get involved with them early on. Stick with the women who didn't spend their HS years at parties getting pumped. They grow up to be good women, not Instagram obsessed retards.

also
unless she's your fucking wife or gf there is no reason to humor some bitch.
HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA
STOP. JUST STOP. GO BACK TO WHERE YOU CAME FROM. BIGGEST LINE OF BULLSHIT YET.
but this one is where you deserve to be pummeled to death at Holla Forums's front page.
this line right here.

> Also, you were just arguing "who cares if you fuck some random chick?" and then you turn around and complain that women are sleeping around? Don't be a fucking hypocryte faggot.
I just pieced it together. It's Holla Forums's first confirmed female this year. Mein gott.
>you need smart educated women (you)
>in their 20s (you)
>they went to college (you)
>larps as christian and pretends to be traditional (you)
>they like to talk about smart people stuff (you)
>they don't like stupid guys (you)
>s-some of t-t-them are v-virgins too! Not all o-of them are s-sluts! (you)
>y-you're a manwhore too if you pump and dump women senpai! Double standards *hypocrite! (you)
why are you here anyways? tell me. >>>/fem/ and that other nobody place i forgot about died years ago. i would fuck you lovely in the missionary position for the purpose of procreation and pleasure tbh.

No thanks.

...

Top keke

Depends on the type of drink. If you're talking beers, at least 16-20. For 80-proof liquor, no less than 25oz.

You talk to the hottest girls with boyfriends. Really come on strong. It increases your status by talking to hot girls and impresses the single girls at the party by showing them that you're not just into fucking, because of course you know those girls have boyfriends.

Find the gayest guy at the party and tell him that you want him to "poz your neghole" after you pass out. That's secret gaybro code for getting you set up with a one night stand.

Good luck!

Basically this, whip your dick out and start smacking the bitch nearest you with it. Bitches love abuse like that, she'll immediately hop on your dick.

Singles of truth. I my experience you want to take the lamps and alarm clocks with them too. Leave everything else behind. These two objects separate the men from the boys but don't be shy to give a lamp a go when you first start out.

I don't think i want to get laid anymore.
Lately i'm so often have a gigant urge to have sex with a girl that i'm staring to think that the universe wants me to have sex because it will somehow have some bad consiquences, liken i'm constantly battle goed but yet i'm afraid that i'll unfortunately (Just with almost ever yt hing in my life) will end up happening anyway.

Liken for example that i'm arguing with myself on that i shouldn't eat chips, yet it will highly likely be that i will end up eating chips.

True, but you will get all the easy white chicks on your dick because you have it.
easy icebreaker

Don't stretch out about it, you'll never get laid unless you're being an autist for the rest of your life.

WTF is nigger doing?
Is he filling it up so he can take a bath?