Sell me your startup

Hi, nice to meet you Holla Forums! You have 2 sentences to sell me your tech startup idea. Please use words I can understand

uber for poz swaps

Ubuntu for niggers. It doesn't count if the product was never delivered

It's like 23andMe, but for eugenics.

It's like programming, but using gestures to build functions with an iPad, leveraging cloud computing for compilation. Textual programming languages are fine for stodgy white men, but we need to open up the computer space to a newer and more inclusive group of millennial coders in order to jump start the next technical revolution; hopefully led by people shut out from the last one.

Internet connected toilet paper roll

It's machine learning startup that uses latest breakthroughs in machine learning to find projects without CoC. When such project is found we send our diverse social justice team to help project adopt Contributor Covenant CoC.

...

We provide BigData analytics leveraging cutting edge research in cloud scalable neural network IoT architectures to optimize arbitrage in global commodity markets, bringing to the surface previously intractable patterns and unforeseen indicators. Let's do this.

Java Java Rust Rust

A Java+India programing language which will help enforcing your diversity quotes

An app that will learn black crippled girls to code.

Machine learning for automatically deleting shit, low-effort summerfag threads like these.

Consulting firm for firms that need to pitch investors in two sentences. We'll make an iPhone app too, of course.

data science firm
rust only
big CATCHY logo

Talk to God. The OS.

TempleOS 2

A new browser written exclusively in C and lisp. I've got the logo finished already.

A compiler that adds bugs and slows downs your code according to your privilege.

A neural network to detect if OP is a faggot
We need $250K to create a .faggot TLD so we can register op.faggot

Hi I'm with the Rust language, let's talk.

Fuck.
Off.

secureroar. A new grsecurity.

All we need is Python, TensorFlow, Rust, MongoDB, and SSL encryption.

It's the Uber of snapchats, for the mobile IoT generation with cloudbased deep learning techniques employed for a convergent cross-platform app experience

startup to get more woman and minoritys to in rust development jobs. money please.

It's a method of facilitating best-of-breed 360-degree change agents to spearhead goal-oriented work breakdown structures. But that's just the view from the 60000 foot level, it dives deep into synergizing empowered face time.

You cunt.

I work for a cartel. Give me all your money or I kill your family and friends.

:^)

Oh shit. We need this.