Ayylmao Convenant

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alien:_Covenant

Pretty much what was posted on 4/8/whatever chan several months back.

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en.wikisource.org/wiki/At_the_Mountains_of_Madness
archive.org/stream/pdfy-9NMTSgzvy2U3U-oz/Alien-Engineers-ORIGINAL-PROMETHEUS-SCRIPT_djvu.txt
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So how is a protomorph different from a xenomorph?

Why does it look like the cover of Thy Flesh Consumed?

Chris Stuckmann gave it an 8/10

GO BACK

lemme guess

So how close is that?

That would go a long way into making plot twist of "David invented xenos 5 years ago lol" more palatable.

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James Franco dies in the first 15 mins.

Is Prometheus really that good? I only saw it once back when I didn't even know the meaning of the word "kino" and thought it was only "okay". Should I give it another shot?

Go ahead, but read en.wikisource.org/wiki/At_the_Mountains_of_Madness first so you can maximize your sensitivity to pottery.

shoo shoo jew, i onto to your tricks

Who are you kidding, Schlomo?

Did Ridley just take a shit on two decades' worth of extended canon with this film?

Of course. But it doesn't matter at all because there's only two Alien movies worth watching. The first and the second. Everything else from the "franchise" is worthless.

I doubt Ridley will live long enough to direct another Alien film. Even so, the film will just be fan-fiction tier at best like this one is.

Alien 3 is KINO. Aliens is schlocky garbage.

So does it include BLACKED propaganda, or is it clean of that? I'm asking because in Prometheus it pretty much ruined the experience for me.


That shit was straight kino, you little faglord.

It's not as classical as an ape looking groid with a blonde woman but a crew full of mystery meat and queers instead. Not sure if that makes it better or worse for you, the only white person in the film is David and Walter. After the white genocide only robots will remain apparently.

Well, that's not exactly great but it's a league ahead of
SHIEET NIGGUH, DAT WHITE WOMYN NEEDS SUM BBC YA KNO WAT I'M SAYIN' MOVIE WATCHAS? GONNA GIB HER MUH BIG DICK.
I guess I'll wait to pirate it.

Reminder that the main villain of promethius wasn't a caveman or a vagina squid, but was supposed to be an ayylmao that was 10 feet tall with huge eyes that burst out of the engineer and slowly killed off the crew

It's already set up in promethius

Source? Everything I ever read was that Ridley Scott eanted to do something that wasn't an alien prequel.

Why is it premiered "officially" in May 19th when it was already premiered on the 12th in my country? no, is not China.

Also, the movie sucks balls, they just had to give us some answers from Prometheus and they screwed up that part, not to mention the very first scene would have been great as the first scene on Prometheus alone.

SPOILERS

CONTINUES

More?

MORE SPOILERS

EVEN MORE SPOILERS

I also forgot to mention a huge detail about the Covenant from the beginning, the characters we see are only the crew, they are entrusted with 2000 people on cryostasis as well as a few hundred frozen/preserved human embryos, guess where David stores his facehugger embryos?

I am done, ask me anything about it while the memory is still fresh.

Are the visuals good? What's the theme of the film?

Visuals are OK, the ships are less clean and sleek than in Prometheus, if you liked the Nostromo then the Covenant is the middle point, most of the scenes are either in a very dark cave where David takes the crew, outside is very cloudy with rain, think the intro of Aliens at LV-426 minus the tech, and the Covenant, in that order, dark green, grey, dark grey, darker gray, some warm colors inside David's home, and mostly white and colder colors inside the ship.

No fancy space suits really, the Covenant may look a little more like the Discovery from Space Odyssey (from outside), the creatures are OK, they look a lot more organinc than the originals though.

As for the theme? basically the creation becoming a "creator" kind of thing, the fact of the matter is, David's motivations become a horrible mess by the end of the film, he was supposed to be programmed to be somewhat "curious" in Prometheus, but in Covenant he is literally Dr. Frankenstein.

Does it feel like a sci-fi movie?

I swear the new captain was the dumbest piece of shit ever.

Half of the time, but different sub-genres at every turn.

Prometheus was a shitheap of plotholes and poor characterization. Also the religious themes were so shallow as to not even qualify as themes. They were like a tiny sprinkling of salt on a turd.


archive.org/stream/pdfy-9NMTSgzvy2U3U-oz/Alien-Engineers-ORIGINAL-PROMETHEUS-SCRIPT_djvu.txt

It was a straight up prequel including a proto-xeno that was soft bodied and white, apparently one of the organisms that was later spliced in to make the full weaponized xeno. The "beluga" xeno and engineer xeno rip shit up and kill the crew. Still not a very good script frankly.

Because loads of metal album covers have similar looks

10/10

more like the first 4.

also, why did this film not have a score? they literally just played the same track from alien over and over, and that one track from prometheus.

At least this had more consistent writing than Prometheus. Everyone is gonna be like "captain is a retard" but his insecurity is part of his character, he isn't a geologist getting lost when he has a virtual map. This also proves that Lindelof is literally the reason why Prometheus sucked.

Ridley Scott IS the anti-theist fedora. Prometheus is a good film but it's not pro-theistic. It has an overtly nihilistic tone (you meet your makers and they are either disappointing or crazed giants). Also Ridley Scott wanted the whole film to be about aliens and have aliens in it, it was the studio that told him to do all the other stuff. How could you get it this wrong?

What would happen if you put your butt in front of an alien egg and farted?

It would be extremely painful

Man, I wish Alien didn't get as bad as it did.

I just saw the movie. I liked it a lot. It's a step up from Promeheus in certain ways imo.

The character wasn't really a Ripley knock-off at all. She has some action scenes, but that doesn't make her "notRipley."

Star Trek logic.

I am surprised that they managed to make people dumber that Prometheus… Holy shit…. How dumb can the crew that is supposed to keep alive 2000 people be so retarded?

Maybe the problem is you're autistic and can't enjoy a movie? You realize this entire franchise is based on decisions that were dumb in hindsight right, back to the first one?

What is the next one? Revelations or maybe Retribution? Wait, there we go "Alien Masturbation".

This was so fucking retarded they actually felt embarrassed about it and cut most of it from the finished movie.
It's only alluded to when one of them dies and the other says he's the love of his life and whatnot.

But yeah, lots of those Prometheus "We have absolutely no idea what the fuck we're doing over here" moments, albeit none of them come close to the utter retardation of the geologist smoking a blunt inside his helmet while trapped in a labyrinthine alien weapon silo, and the biologist trying to pet the newly discovered alien life form that is clearly hostile.

Those two still reign supreme.

YOU'RE KIDDING ME, RIGHT?
TOP-FUCKING-KEK

Just got back from seeing it, felt like a lot of wasted potential honestly. Pacing is awful, too many characters and poor characterization to boot makes it so you don't give a shit about any of them. Certain scenes completely change the feel and tone of the movie, some so much so that you feel like you're watching a comedy. The scene with the first Neomorph in the dropship, all that was missing was some Benny Hill music, fucking seriously.
All of the characters are dumb as rocks, and it completely takes you out of the movie since you're wondering how someone could trust these people with such an important mission. Lots of missed opportunities to use more practical effects. The CGI looks good, but well done practical effects would have enhanced the overall tone and presentation.

With all that said, there was about 5% of the movie that felt creative, and genuinely freaked me out. The little 2 note music prompt for when an Alien is near, or David's being evil. The Neomorph and Protomorph look exceptionally good, and the way they stand upright almost like a human is very unnerving.

The only good part of the movie was David. I sided with him and his plan to wipe out all human and engineer life.

I treat these prequels as non-canon since they feel nothing close to the universe of the original Alien movies.

Basically everything involving David is the meat and potatos of the movie. And it shows since they're the only interesting parts of the movie.

The entire series should have just been it's own series but Ridley Scott doesn't want to come up with clones of everything in the Alien franchise.

Agreed. Fassbender was gloriously affably evil.

Wonder what happened to the army of protomorphs david released on the engineer city? And what the fuck was up with Tennessee risking 2000 colonists all for his fucking wife. Goddamn that pissed me off. They should have just left for Origai 6 then and there.

The next one will be "Halo"

I have no idea if David can control them or not but he probably sent them off to murder other Engineers.

Don't forget the nigger captain (who puts a nigger in charge?) deciding to abandon his monitoring station to go muh dick the blonde cunt despite two of his people being left behind in an alien structure and knowing there is something else alive with them. This is the person his crew were willing to die with for whatever reason.

Also, in the future they can't record video and audio apparently, so it's a complete mystery what happens to the two cretins. Or the lead female forgetting to mention she has given birth to an alien octopus that is now loose on the ship they are likely going to use to get home. Or the biologist examining the helmet outside a hazmat environment.

I mean, it's not horror when everyone keeps acting like a cretin and the audience actively wants them to die a horrible death for being stupid, unlikeable characters.

Not entirely. The xenos, or deacons/neomorphs are still an engineer creation, david just experimented to make them into the versions we all know and love.

Uhh there was pretty retarded moments in this movie.

Really? What the fuck?

Are his xenos rape demons because David is a repressed faggot with daddy issues?

None of these movies make sense because David just seems to get the run of things. Why the fuck did Shaw trust him?

going to watch movie today, my dick is tingly… brb

David represents the devil. This was suggested in Prometheus and outwardly stated in Covenant. He also views human beings and other life forms as things to play with for his amusement, which is probably directly related to his feelings about being an android.

David didn't show any signs of foul-play to the other crew members in Prometheus. He spiked the drink of Shaw's husband without anyone knowing, and didn't do really anything else.

She needed David if she had any chance of surviving on that planet, but unfortunately, David had other plans.

Why!? That was literally retarded to do, and by the ending I didn't care anymore about the crew.
I wonder what what the lead girl's thought's were at the ending? I wonder what Shaw's thought's were?
That H.R. Giger art they showed was fucking unreal scary and godly amazing.

ridley, it's time to hang it up ol boy.

that scene's not in the movie?

nope

entire movie is about james franco's faggy crew fighting xenomorphs on some gay planet

that scene was in the movie…

It is in the movie but only for 30 seconds

AHHHHHHHHHH

There was plenty of psycho sexual connotations towards the end, as per giger..even some rip off giger art by David at one point. The shower scene murder by the xeno towards the end was shoe horned in, but well worth it. pretty much everything has been said about the movie in this thread, it ties prometheus together well.


The only thing I can say is what's better than one Fassbender? TWO FASSBENDERS

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It's in the movie. Guess you didn't watch it, retard.

It's because David was designed to serve Weyland. Once Weyland was dead, he went off on his own tangents, which was treating people like things like Weyland had done to him. The fact he got his head lopped off at one point probably made him get more twisted as well.

Just saw it:
Pros:
-Fassbender

Cons:
-Everything else

Saw it in ultra HD or whatever it is that they charge and extra 5 bucks on, not worth it. Pirate this one.

Fassbender was great, but there's plenty of other pros like the sets, music and xenos and shit. Seriously, I don't know what it takes to satisfy anyone here. This film was clearly better than Prometheus. You're probably not going to get an Alien movie better than this at this point.

Why did the aliens need a backstory on how they were created? IMO they were cooler as some random space entity that had evolved along weird lines and had infected some alien that the nostromo found the corpse of. Making them bioweapons makes them less interesting.

I'LL DO THE FINGERING

It was implied from the Alien that they were bio-weapons, the whole point was Ripley was sent out their by her corperate overlords to collect a specimen in the first place.

Audiences are retarded. Hardly surprising.


It was better structured and executed than Prometheus while still retaining some of the glaring faults Prometheus had like the shitty pacing, logical inconsistencies, etc etc.
But Prometheus was a far more interesting movie based on premise and themes alone.

This was just Alien 5 with bits of Prometheus sprinkled on top for good measure, and it's no coincidence the best parts of Covenant are the scenes with David.

If you didn't get they were bioweapons from the first film, you need to work on your critical thinking. It's heavily implied.

Not the point I was making, faggot. That scene might as well have been out of gay porn because of how faggy the dialogue was. It was so hamfisted even normalfags could pick up on unintentionally retarded it was.

PLACE YOUR FINGERS OVER THE HOLES

to an emotionless robot, yea, what's so funny? but cmon.

It was a great scene honestly. The dialogue helps because it helps get across the point these characters aren't human beings.

It was the point you should have made then, retard. Regardless of how many problems it undoubtedly has, it's hardly the movie's fault your screening was filled with manchildren.

This guy gets it ->>745563

That scene underscores how unnatural those characters are and just how different Walter and David are from each other. One is flamboyant and eccentric while the other is the exact opposite.

It could have been a great scene if the dialogue didn't read like it was revised in a single pass, hence the unintended hilarity.


I didn't elect you to speak for me nigger.
Yeah, when the dialogue is literal pretentious faggotry, that's the movies fault. Lighten up, films are not to be always treated with utmost reverence no matter who makes them. If the dialogue sounds gay and corny as fuck, then it's gay and corny as fuck. This is one of those times where it's obvious to everyone.

That's fucking disgusting user.

Fuck off reddit

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Saw the movie in a packed theater. No one laughed or even hinted at wanting to laugh at the dialogue. Take your own advice and don't speak on behalf of other people.


I have no idea what this is supposed to mean so I'm just going to assume it was meant for someone else. (?)

The retcon that David created the xenomorphs doesn't bother me since Giger always had them as being bio-technological.

I think a better idea would have been having the Xenos be to the Engineers what the androids are to the humans. Make it that the Engineers used the Xenos to build their cities, conquer planets and such for them.

I don't really get the hype for the Xenos being the perfect lifeform or whatever, it's clear that humans, androids and engineers are superior to them.

Sorry, wasn't expecting this flick to get a standing ovation in Pretentious Twatsville, USA.

Wasn't even doing that you dumb nigger. Fix your comprehension and quit getting so defensive over a gay robot fingering flutes.

Is this series secretly redpilled?

What the hell are you talking about?

Someone started laughing uncontrollably towards the end of the film.

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Nope

You can't say it wasn't satisfying when he doubletaps the neomorph in the chest and magdumps on it.

And get communication cut off with the Covenant by a plasma storm or whatever that can last "days, weeks, or…months".

No, the problem is that any idiot can see the flaws. Throw a curveball at us, throw a new challenge. The hero has to rise over what he was once capable of, but if he's rising to a lightbulb IQ then it doesn't have the same effect.

This. Everyone is literally dumb as dirt and it doesn't help that the half crew is apparently married to eachother.
You know, if you wanted your wife to be safe so she could bear your children, don't take her along on a galaxy wide colony mission (although the pods seemed safe enough), and failing that, don't let her pilot an aircraft onto an unknown planet that you didn't know existed until a few weeks prior.

That scene with Weyland was pretty shallow.

Right?

They kill two of them, in positions of difficulty no less, in the span of 20 minutes. Hardly perfect.

All this butthurt over "muh actshun heru deid" is proof enough that Alien 3 is the best in the series.

Alien 3 is everything liberal goons hate, it's both very working class and yet also not materialist.

Dude, look at the rest of Finchers output. The guy is an obvious cuck.

Is there a real torrent up for it yet? Everything I've found so far is fake.

The perfect lifeform would be, some kind of lovecraftian-tier creature, with tentacles and mouths and eyes everywhere, or something

Fucking tasteless pleb. Do the world a favor and remove your degenerate genes from the pool.

What a shit-tier idea.

It's much better to have it so that the Engineers and Xenos both are something created by a force that we still haven't seen.

BRAVO, RIDLEY

or maybe that we have

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so it's actually good? i'm going to torrent it or buy the bluray, watching movies in the cinema ruins the experience

There was music? I'm pretty sure literally every musical cue was either the main titles from alien or the first track played in prometheus. I'm a score guy, and this honestly jingled my jangles a bit.

PLEASE, WHERE CAN I WATCH IT?

At the nearest theater, goy.

Lol nope films are dubbed in my city, and I am not paying Jewllywood.

It's enjoyable. First third is really boring though, it picks up later one. It's miles ahead of capeshit if that's what's worrying you. The scares really got me too, even the obvious ones.

why didn't you record it :'(

I laughed out loud at that part. I get that they wanted to kill Franco's character at the start and didn't want to pay him enough to actually appear on set, but I could think of a dozen less retarded ways for them to kill him off.

I have no idea how anyone can take this film seriously after viewing this scene.

I fucking hate this argument. Yes, the crew in Alien could've made smarter decisions, but many of those bad decisions are made by (or influenced by) Ash, who is actively trying to make sure the alien survives, and many of them happen because they reasonably underestimate how dangerous the alien really is (for example, Brett going off alone when they're looking for the alien is reasonable because the last time they saw it, it was 6 inches tall).

nothing the original crew does is as idiotic as say, flying their entire ship into a storm (that will likely cause enough damage to the ship to kill everyone) just because you are desperate to contact your wife. the covenant crew doesn't even get punished for that dumbass decision

How did he know what they needed to be? Did David see Alien?

David literally saved them from xenos earlier in the film. The replacement captain was incompetent, sure, but he had a reason to trust David.

Why are these even prequels? They don't feel like prequels at all, the technology feels extremely advanced compared to the lo-fi gritty 70's tech of the original. I do understand that Alien was made in 79 so they had to make due but it still annoys me that there isn't consistency when it's possible.

Why wouldn't they trust David? Granted, the captain could be freaked out by Davids attempt to talk to the neomorph, but its not like David explained his reasoning or showed any sign of trying to fuck shit up.

I think its important to remember that the people in the Alien movies don't usually expect a large, black alien from hell to just pop out of their friends.

They planet in Covenant is seen to be more friendly all over compared to their destination. There was wheat growing, and flora that was more or less identical to what is found on Earth. Why would they expect evil spores? Again remember, they went down to this planet on a whim. Maybe full protocol caution wasn't top priority.

Hindsight is easy for the people watching the movie, its different in a tense situation in where you are hunted by more or less immortal super aliens.

It was just an old cargo ship, but agreed the tech was more well thought in 2001 than in Alien.

Yeah.
Their reproductive process is convoluted and inefficient. Seriously facehuggers are a waste of resources
Their forms aren't sufficiently streamlined for stealth hunting and/or fast movement, which I assume is what they are supposed to do? At least before aliens made them a hive
What's the point of the eel mouth on land?
What is the point of random chimneys on their backs?
Why is the head so long?
Why are their jaw muscles/skin so ripped up?

If the humans in these movies were even semi-competent xenomorphs would be driven to extinction by now.

Did the ending where David was granted control of the ship go over your head or were you just not paying attention?


You're a fucking god damn autist. Read a history book or something instead I guess.

The ship in Alien was a "space truck" for hauling cargo. It was supposed to be gritty because of what it was, not because the tech was old.

It's called not fucking with something that isn't broken. Recycling the Goldsmith cues brought back a sense of classiness that hasn't been heard since the first movie.

What really activates my almonds is how so much of the shit in Covenant is off the shelf. It just feels lazy as fuck. You're telling me that 100 years in the future we're still running around with M4 rifles and ACOG optics? It kinda breaks the suspension of disbelief when you're watching a film set in the future and you see someone wearing an ArcTeryx hardshell jacket with a GoPro on their shoulder.

It's meh, there is absolutely nothing, and I mean literally nothing original about it, but the scenes still somehow work and can actually generate suspense. And it's not ideologically loaded feminist horseshit like the first Alien at least.

The movie is good. The people crying about it like capeshit and Star Wars. That says everything you need to know.

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Stronger, faster, kills uninfected humans shortly after birth, suvives gunshots easily.
Mouth opens like a crocodile mouth thus jaws bigger.
I found him to be much stronger than the xeno.

The Protomorph has wasp DNA, it's impervious to fire, and looks ever so slightly bigger. The differences are subtle so if you showed somebody who hadn't seen the film they would probably just say 'it's an alien'.

tbh the original one was too

made my day, think I'm going to like Holla Forums

was he really? old movies, the only thing that scared him was the flame thrower

scared him maybe but never actually hurt or killed an adult one. its possible it caused him pain or sensory overload considering the unorthodox methods the alien used to sense the world around him