Fucking up neighbours property

Jonathan Morgan
Jonathan Morgan

ok Holla Forums, heres the deal. my neighbour is fucking up my orchard, chopping down my trees that are close to his property (but still far enough), shoveling dirt from my side to his so he can level his land etc. he does so without any warning or question. so how do i fuck up his property, trees and a cabin in a quietest, subtlest way possible?

Lucas James
Lucas James

There is no problem in the world that can't be fixed by fire.

Chase Campbell
Chase Campbell

Store shit in bags that break and toss them over to his place. The stench will attrach all kinds of nasty shit there. Also this

Austin Anderson
Austin Anderson

keep in mind that my orchard is right next to his property, so i dont want to fuck up my shit too

Lincoln Bailey
Lincoln Bailey

Fill the spots he takes dirt from usually with something dastardly. Like something that will kill all his plants or poison his food if the plants drink the water and he uses it to grow fruit of some shit.

Charles Diaz
Charles Diaz

tbh just tell the police.
the law will fuck his ass harder than you ever could.

Sebastian Roberts
Sebastian Roberts

just sue him over the trees. It will cost him tens of thousands to replace.

Ryder Roberts
Ryder Roberts

his son is a police officer, i dont think it would go that well
besides i want to take thing in my on hands because sweet, sweet revenge

Caleb Bell
Caleb Bell

Have you asked him about this?
Have you asked the authorities about this?
Also get a surveyor to delineate where exactly the property line is. One or both of you may be mistaken about where the property line actually lies. If you have an orchard then you should have no problem with erecting cheap fence along it.
What kind of acreage are we talking about here?

Alexander Sanders
Alexander Sanders

<call police
his son is a police officer, i dont think it would go that well
ill do something illegal instead
and since i have motive and opportunity that will definitely go well for me

Joshua Miller
Joshua Miller

we both know that he did it, we both know where the fucking line is, dont know the acreage, not amerifag, but a small family orchard

m8 neither he nor i will take that thing to the court, and his faggot of a son cant do anything because of other illegal reasons they're in

Isaiah Clark
Isaiah Clark

spread salt all over his soil and then water it. It will be impossible for plants to grow there unless he physically removes the topsoil and replaces it.

Thomas Taylor
Thomas Taylor

This, and if you have the space for it, spell something out using dead spots.

Or maybe draw a jizzing cock or something.

idk be creative

Owen Price
Owen Price

now this is the shit i'm talking about

Elijah Sullivan
Elijah Sullivan

An acre is a square measurement you idiot. Surely if you own an orchard you should know how much square area it encompasses. Where the hell are you from? And why are you so intent to deal with this in such a womanly passive-aggressive manner?
Either go burn his house down or kill him while he's in the act.

Jackson Bailey
Jackson Bailey

i think OP is obliged by the law of dubs to do what the very first post tells him

Jaxon Butler
Jaxon Butler

burning his cabin
my trees are close to his fucking cabin, you fucking nero

Lucas Mitchell
Lucas Mitchell

OP said he's in Yurop, so he can't fill this shitheel with buckshot the second he steps over OP's property line.

Nathan Gray
Nathan Gray

This is horrible advice. Do you know how hard it is to get a conviction? Does OP have proof beyond a reasonable doubt that this guy is doing this? Enough proof to stand up to court?

I've had people steal stuff from me. Everyone, including the cops knew who did it. But they didn't have enough proof to stand up in court, so they got away with it. You need solid proof, like video of them doing it and the video clear enough that you can clearly recognize the faces of the people involved.

Something like this is much better.

Isaiah Cook
Isaiah Cook

implying

These trees will be honored to be purged in a cleansing fire FOR THE EMPEROR!

Kayden Garcia
Kayden Garcia

if you poison his land, he'll know it's you and poison yours ten times over.
all you can do is fence it and mine your side. if you're a slav, this shouldn't be hard.

Cameron Nelson
Cameron Nelson

write a letter to the president or your congressman.

Nolan Harris
Nolan Harris

no he wont and the fence wont stop him, thats for sure. the soil poisoning is the only doable option i see right now

Lucas Lee
Lucas Lee

be sure to post back here after he escalates ths thing and fucks you over back for poisoning his land

Alexander Wright
Alexander Wright

prop up a few garden gnomes on your property
every night, move them a little bit closer to his property
also, add one or two new garden gnomes every night
you should have about two dozen or more by the time they reach his property
keep adding more gnomes nightly but stop moving them closer, leave them right at the property line
keep going until there are 50 of them or more
suddenly, one night, take all of them away
next night, place one of them clearly within his property but near the line
place another one behind his house, looking in his window (bedroom if it's on the ground floor)
if he asks you about the gnomes, pretend you have nothing to do with it and are just as confused as he is
the next day or night or whenever he's not home, break into his house and put all the gnomes inside everywhere you can
if he talks to you about the gnomes, offer to help him get rid of them
tell him you heard from a friend of a friend that gnomes have been known to break into people's houses if that person violated their spiritual domain
if they don't stop disrespecting the gnomes by fucking with their land, the person who was visited by the gnomes will vanish without a trace sometime during his life (so it's really vague, not within a week or month or anything specific)
be like "no idea if it's true, but the gnomes came from around the property line so maybe that's their spiritual domain"
if he doesn't stop, put gnomes near the property line every time he fucks with your property but never on the days he doesn't
if he ever catches you handling the gnomes and confronts you, tell him you're secretly a gnome yourself

Joseph Price
Joseph Price

only doable option
you're a fool if you play him at his own game. shout at him first. build a nasty sharp fence next. then make concrete casts of pics 1&2 related (paint) and leave them visibly half buried. if he continues, move to pic3

Isaiah Lewis
Isaiah Lewis

kek, but i could see myself doing that

how is building a fucking minefield easier than poisoning his land

Easton Murphy
Easton Murphy

DO IT FAGGOT

Justin Barnes
Justin Barnes

That's only if your so-called orchard is comprised of three trees total. The trees will be fine.
And you still haven't told us where you are. That would make this much easier.
the fence wont stop him
What's your reason for believing this?

You know OP. The more shit you talk the more you sound like you're just a bad larper. Either give us the real story or gtfo.

Bentley Garcia
Bentley Garcia

im not burning my trees user, im an yuropoor in a wooded area, that all you need to know. no one is forcing you to shitpost here, you know?

Gabriel Morris
Gabriel Morris

termites can be purchased online for very little money
buy some
put them at the base of his cabin, on the farthest side from your property
the termites won't leave that cabin until they have eaten it all, so you won't have to worry about them unless he just abandons the place
if he wants to repair the damage he will have to kill off all the termites first
which is fine because more termites can be purchased online for very little money

Elijah Bell
Elijah Bell

Won't pest control be conscient of the termite species? If it's not native to the area then they'll probably be aware that it was done by another person.

Jaxon Ortiz
Jaxon Ortiz

I don't buy that. I fail to see how his cabin is so inundated within the treeline that it being on fire is going to be a danger to your fanciful orchard. What kind of orchard do you claim to own anyway? Why aren't you providing any kind of information other than "i'm miffed how do i cowardly mess with my neighbor"?

I reiterate: either quit your larping to gtfo.

Julian Diaz
Julian Diaz

wouldnt termites spread to other buildings and wood made stuff?

you dont need to buy anything, dataminig faggot

Alexander Fisher
Alexander Fisher

I have a precious orchard
I don't know how big it is
I don't know what kind of trees I have
I'm poor
lol go home

Angel Nelson
Angel Nelson

m-muh board guys, y-you cant post what i dont like
man, i wouldnt wish my worst enemy the level of retardation you have

Adrian Turner
Adrian Turner

gets miffed at neighbor
asks Holla Forums how to terrorize neighbor
gets miffed at Holla Forums
accuses other people of retardation
teehee

Cooper Brooks
Cooper Brooks

wouldnt termites spread to other buildings and wood made stuff?
Not unless their original and preferred source of food runs out. Termites prefer dead wood to live, and will eat a house/cabin completely before moving on to other dead wood, unless there is something like a fire wood pile right next to the house. Your orchard is safe though.

Won't pest control be conscient of the termite species?
Maybe. But probably not. Especially if you are rural. The ideal thing would be to buy tropical or desert termites that die off in the winter, and just re-infest the place every spring when it warms up. That way you won't have to worry about it spreading to your property at all.

This is actually a pretty good idea. Your neighbor will be left to either eliminate the termites and rebuild whatever damage they did prior to them being discovered, or simply abandoning the place and letting them eat it. If he does eliminate them and rebuild, all you have to do is re-infest it. Eventually he will give up, at which time you call the local authorities and have them force him to remove the infested structure *and* the termites before they spread to your property. In the meantime, save up all your money, because that property will eventually come up on the market for cheap.

Lincoln Stewart
Lincoln Stewart

how do i fuck up his property, trees and a cabin in a quietest, subtlest way possible?
Sell your property to a nigger.

Aaron Kelly
Aaron Kelly

Strafe his property with napalm.

Henry Morales
Henry Morales

very interesting, thanks user

Camden Williams
Camden Williams

This is really the only way. Obviously OP is a wee little pussy bitch who weewees in his panties at the sight of his old neighbor.

Brayden Wright
Brayden Wright

what is the slope of the land like? are you uphill or downhill from him?

Landon Garcia
Landon Garcia

ayy

Jayden Cooper
Jayden Cooper

being so stupid that you don't know how to make claymores

JFC, you really need to consider an hero, fam

Noah Williams
Noah Williams

although we're mostly side by side i do have a part with uphill advatage, 2-3 meters from his leveled part

will watch, sick intro music though

Levi Baker
Levi Baker

well, a flood is kinda hard to fix with fire

Kayden Allen
Kayden Allen

barely uphill
ok good. now you need to get to work on this flood bit you mentioned. ever heard of a swale? it's a flood prevention control (slows water down, spreads it out) and tree growing system. you have an orchard, so you got the perfect excuse. dig a swale, plant some trees (or not), and make sure that the overflow spillway of your swale is poorly designed and pointed at his house. it's subtle enough you could play dumb but if you "mess up" the right way, you'll do major long term damage. at worst, you water his lawn

John Torres
John Torres

in case i didn't explain that well enough, dig a long skinny pond, and make sure the wall of the dam will fail in his direction

Juan Carter
Juan Carter

yeah, we have swales here, i understand, thanks

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