Cheaper by the Dum-dum

Oh no, Black Cat used the cat claw artifact she stole from the costume museum to hypnotize Bailey into becoming her henchperson! Now you might have a few questions like why would an actual magical artifact be in a costume museum or why a brainwashing artifact would be a claw and not a ray gun or something since it's hard to have brainwashed minions when you've gashed them open or what would Black Cat do if this random thing didn't just fit her fingers perfectly or what the fuck that thing even is.

You have to understand you need to just turn your brain off and think about the more serious drama that's going to occur now that Black Cat has the power of a big bag! Will Hellcat be able to reverse the brainwashing and get her friend back? You better get those four dollars ready because it's all going down next month!

In the while, check out these great fan arts from fans!

Yes, this is what a superhero looks like. Yep. Totally not somebody who's going to turn evil later, either through magic or some incredibly forced and hackneyed """character development""".

This is literally the comic equivalent of listening to a shallow girl prattle on about her boring life for hours on end.

Some people actually pay for this privilege.

Can someone remind me why this shit keeps going past double digits while equally cancerous Tumblr-tier comics like Mockingbird gets cancelled in Issue 8? How poorly did that comic sold before Marvel pulled the plug?

The author of Mockingbird has won awards for her previous works before she got into comics. Granted, they were meaningless awards given out by a liberal newspaper, but that still means she was able to command a higher salary than Kate Leth. Thus, when the book sold poorly, they actually had to cancel it, rather than being able to justify that they're still making $0.36 in profit off of it like they are with Hellcat.

oh fuck not again

"Ian, you're my best friend in the world!!!"
What? Has this person even been treated like a character until last issue? I thought he was just a background gay thrown in for flavor.

So, this confirms that Black Cat just really wanted 4 people she could play dress up with?

Believe it or not Mockingbird actually sold better than Hellcat, but Marvel cancelled it while this shit still goes on. Shows that the Diversity First books really only permeate because the writers are paid in peanuts and spider-man triple action web blasters. Why do you think Kate complains on twitter about being broke even though she has so much work?

So, Black Cat's end goal is to amass more goons, so she can put them in tunnel snake jackets with cat ears? Does she need the magic purse so she can fill it with even more tunnel snake jackets? Will she ever stop???

...

How many of these threads must we endure before Marvel unfucks their shit?

AT LEAST one more. Though if anyone can confirm a cover for issue 14, I guess the ride never ends.

As bad as Mockingbird was, at least shit actually happened in that book. Poorly written superheroics are still superheroics.

But this? Nothing fucking happens in this book! It's just mindless tumblr blog bullshit! There are no real stakes, there is no real conflict, just a bunch of schlock one would expect from the mind of a teenage girl with a penchant for yaoi trash. This book's existence provides nothing for the world but rather takes away from it by way of destroying my hope for the human race. Every day that this product exists makes me wish more and more for the annihilation of this gay earth and the sweet release of total oblivion.

Fuck you, Kate Leth. And your gross yellow teeth.

...

How exciting. I really care about Ians character development here.

Wasn't Patsy supposed to be the one with a hidden frothing rage literally just before this arc happened? Ian was just the one who at some point touched a vagina instead of a dick.
Well that was a bad plan.

Who gives a shit? Seriously.

>Makes a stop so Ian can get in his super-clothes so he can hit up a gay bar fight crime.

Wouldn't it have been easier to do the robbery first then try to get rid of Hellcat? It's not like Patsy has been investigating her.

I don't know what's worse, that if Ians ex had tried throwing her knife now he would have been unable to defend himself or that she had a direct link to the goons in the museum but didn't think to call for backup. Then again she doesn't seem that fussed so maybe she's realised that her sole reason for existing is to be a villian in Hellcat.
Why?
Fuck me, did Patsy just get an extra 50 years?

Please, someone kill me.

I guess they don't teach "show don't tell" anymore in school

By the way, isn't she-hulk supposed to be in a hospital and everyone's terribly heartbroken over it ? Because for the past few volumes they've all apparently stopped giving a shit about her.
Which reminds me, so now Ian is Hellcat's "best friend", even though she's known hulkette much longer, has had her life and livelihood saved numerous times by her and always received much better advice, company and friendship from her than from him… but again, HE is her best friend ?
How does she always find new ways to make herself look worse than she used to ? What a cranky cunt

Why is that guy on the second page drawn like the prince of the little mermaid? Is this one of Leth's fetishes?

Oh wait, so… bag lady isn't dead after all ?
… why the fuck did they say she was dead then ? And why was anyone expecting me to tell that the girl in the last panel is actually Attaché being mind-controlled ? All henchwomen's faces are forgettable so I just confused her with another one of them since she was wearing the same shirt…
I swear to fucking god, this entire ordeal reads like it was written by a fanfic "writer" who has absolutely no understanding whatsoever of how storytelling functions in comics.

Wait, so everyone here has to tolerate Patsy's bullshit but the moment the fag grows a spine she is bothered amd won't tolerate it? Fucking cunt.

I have noticed that when angry thw artist depicts the gay less effeminate. Seriously, look at the first issues, he looked like a short haired girl and in this issue looks like a 17 y/o boy

Wow, Black Cat got FAT. I guess the spider-dick helps to keep your weight

I will give it this at least. It at least had a female acting as the abuser in a relationship. Granted it doesn't play it as badly as if a man were the abuser, but she's still seen as a dispicable person.

That, however, is merely a sprig of parsley atop this gargantuan mass of shit.

This is some Saturday Morning Cartoon levels of bullshit. I'm reminded of Yugi-oh abridged making fun of that.
"THERE ARE HEAVY IMPLICATIONS OF VIOLENCE HAPPENING"

man, Ian looked 100 times better in his girlfriend phase. I wonder why he'd fag up like tha- oh wait, Leth's only gay friends must be all queens and that's the only way she thinks gays can be

Silly user, a woman is NEVER the abusive party.

Mind my words, they will only scold her for her homophobic treatment.

I'd wager all gay guys Leth knows are men who are terrified of her fucking them and so they pretend to be homosexual to avoid her lust

She has a (cucked) boyfriend, and must suck a mean dick to keep her job, so she must have some guys interested.

As my father used to say, "no woman is ugly from the waist down"

Hellcat has revealed more about the state of our media than Gamergate ever did. We've learned so much in these twelve issues.

We have sadly discovered more about Leth's mentality. This book tells so much about how she sees the world.

How many dead bodies does she know the location of? There has to be an easier way out of just one than publishing this crap.

Okay… after this point i'm pretty sure about that getting shoot is less painful than reading this shit!

Oh my god this fucking scrub

cuck doesn't begin to describe

real talk. I just can't take this seriously. These goons are being written up as major, dangerous characters, when in reality they're just… random goons.

But one of them doesn't clean up after herself and she hates gays! How much more dangerous can you get?

I was hoping that when I got around to posting this, it would be in celebration for the end of all this… but, it was never meant to be. Last issue had mentions of Jubilee and She-Hulk in the letter section, and the one before that had a panel about how Patsy would never be caught dead in a karaoke bar… I can't promise any future visions in this issue, but tell me if you catch anything.

Be honest, did you even remember these claw things were part of the suit?

Apparently Patsy forgets about them a lot, too, as things go slightly rough.

Reunion time!

Another problem comes up and Patsy lets other take care of it for her… oh, wait, no! She actually participates in what's going on and is a deciding factor… almost like she's the main character of the book? That's odd.

But dude, when you are such a shit superhero that in 12 issues you have yet to beat a single supervillain, need to be rescued by every co-star and seems like your only abilities are forcing everyone to kiss your ass and put chibi faces of course random goons are going to be your biggest threat in a fist fight

And thus it all ends, everyone is happy. I assume that unknown to Patsy she was secretly cursed to become a washed up loser, but the curse had a 6 to 7 year delay.

Later, True Believers! Until Leth stops writing Patsy, make mine a merciful bullet to my brain

I wonder if Kate Leth aka Hellfat would be more tolerable if the artist was the same as that Hellcat comic

Fuck, any competent artist

Leth probably turns the script in 2 days before deadline, so it might not matter TOO much. You might even be sadder to see a better artist wasted on it.

It would be a good thing to have money going to better artists, but a poorly written comic that looks good is still bad.

The artist for the current Hellfat book is actually competent, she just gets the scripts two days before she has to turn in any work. Some of her art was posted in other threads, and it was actually pretty nice.

As someone who dealt with multiple shitty roommates over the span of just a couple years I find these first few pages extremely triggering. And then she also portrays the faggot as a weak-willed easily bullied pussy, which is a massive stereotype. I thought Letch was supposed to be an ally. I'm of half a mind to start a campaign to get her fired for this offensive garbage.
#RemoveLetch
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No seriously what the fuck.

WHY DID YOU EVEN THROW HER IN THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE YOU STUPID TWAT

They're literally the size of fucking Oompa-Loompas in the first panel of page 10 what the fuck

Ok so when Jewbaalee calls Fatsy on page 12 Black Cat and her hired retards are standing in front of the museum. And when Fatsy and Peein arrive god knows how many minutes later is when Black Cat finally enters it.

So Black Cat and her dipshit cronies literally just stood there in front of the store doing nothing while Fatsy and Peein left the apartment, acquired a bad costume, changed into a bad costume and then finally get there themselves, all on foot. Which one assumes would take at the very least 10 to 15 minutes.

Just absolutely fantastic writing. Bravo, Letch.

Fucking what?

??????????????????

None of this makes any fucking sense none of these characters behave like rational human beings. It's almost as if the writer of this trash is mentally retarded or something.

Indeed. We actually know too much on that front. Her life is so incredibly pathetic. She's caught between her massive ego and her crippling insecurity.

Well, it is true the covers are usually decent and women's faces look pretty on them, but hell the pages are awful

Dude, don't excuse the author's inability to write good stuff. Leth is a shit writter, period. Hee only excuse is that noone tell her no when she most needed it.

They've said before in their letters that the covers are done MONTHS ahead of time. This was how we found out Leth was late on scripts.

It also indicates another problem with Leth that I didn't realize until now: She changes the stories last minute.

I'm sure it is not because she thought better, but some "Oh i JUST thought how to make this more cute/zany hihihi" or some petty reason like that. Because it is impossibke the changes come from editors, as we all now Marvel stopped using those qround the time Secret Invasion ended.

No, they stopped using editors on Bendis and a few of their other 'star talents'. Most of the rest of their output is actually editorially-mandated storylines.

Marvel's real problem is that their editors are all shit.

DO IT

Is it me, or was this issue just an excuse for Kate to use the gay guy to vent about some shitty roommate she might've had at some point?
Nah, it's more likely Kate was the shitty roommate.

I can see that, with the spin of his/her roomate growng a spine and calling her on her bullshit, thus making her, surprise surprise… THE VICTIM OF BULLYING

why does she keep trying to emulate anime shit
i mean she keeps trying to mix anime shit with SJW progresive western garbage with writing that looks like it came out of a AO3 tumblr fic about coffe shops and whatever's trending on Tumblr right now.

What the fuck is she evern trying to do?

She's mocking us all

You've been saying at least one more month for a year now
user, I think we are gonna be here for a while…

No the artist is fucking shit dude don't fag enable them. That fucking cover is godawful dude.

What's the male equivalent?
Because I have a "friend" who only ever talks about those magic crystals, salts and alien vibrations. It's quite incredible actually how he manages to bore me within seconds.

Sounds like some sort of gay warlock, so… go with that until a better term is invented.

14? user, there's a cover for 15!

Where does she come up with this stuff? The answer of course is living a boring, mundane life and thinking it's worth sharing with the world.

Tumblr. All her writing experience comes from one of those Tumblr "Send me a promt" posts.

...

Which issue recap had the origin of Leth storylines? The one with the bedbugs?

Ian looks like the lead singer of My Chemical Romance during their music video Welcome to the Black Parade.

We've reached a point where the house of ideas is so empty that it's not even haunted by ghosts anymore.

...

so….when did Black Cat become a straight-up supervillain?

I mean, yeah, she was always kind of a Catwoman analogue for Spidey to bone but I can't see her running street gangs and shit
was it entirely Leth's doing because she wanted a cat-themed villain to play off the cat-themed hero she was hired to ruin?

After The Superior Spider-Man, Dan Slott made her a straight-up super-villain for no apparent reason. She's pissed with Spidey's actions, Spidey literally explains to her it was Doc Ock in his body, she straight up believes him, but goes "but he's not here so I'm going to make you suffer instead".

I also just noticed… why are ALL of the girls' lips black ? Why do they ALL have exactly the same lipstick, and why the black one of all lipsticks ?..
And why isn't the faggot using it too ?

wow. that's some shit right there

TBH she's showed signs of being a stalker-psycho before, at one point she went nuts on MJ and was going to "get Peter back", but she kind of got distracted by Flash Thompson giving her the dick.

Maybe that's all she needs, she needs Flash to give her the dick again.

She's in a Kate Leth comic so she is surely now in a lesbian phase, so expect sexual tension with hellcat (or whoever female guest star saves her this arc, like Jubilee)

Boy I'm sure glad we have a strong, female character like Patsy Walker to remind Fagneto to consider *her* feelings when he's confronted with his abusive ex!

Otherwise we might get distracted!

Got you covered.

Poor Kitten. Her life is much shorter than ours, all she's ever known is the Hell that is Patsy Walker.

If he did, I'd be happy for him. Dude got pushed around his whole life, it's about time he stood up for himself.

Couldn't Fagneto just use his magic powers to like, lift those bikes off the ground (kinda like what he did with the garbage can) and prevent them from escaping?

He's still a fag though, the kind that the legend himself, Omar Mateen, would drop hotter that a pozz load on a gay bar.

When, anons? When will the pain just end?

Apparently for at least three more months since even volume 15 has got a cover ready for it.
Enjoy the ride !

Dude, noone in comics has any creativity with telekinesis. They only use it to push people and lift heavy objects, that's it. The only original things I've read in Marvel was stoping a virus spreading and changing the place of the atoms of your clothes so you get a different outfit. And that was in the 70s/80s

It doesnt mean the seres can't be cancelled. I remember a Dr. Doom mini that was announced some years ago, covers included, and was aborted before going to print

Better a fag than a cuck.

In Grant Morrison's X-Men, Jean Grey made a squad of U-Men crap themselves in their spacesuits.

He probably already got cucked one way or another. And just for the fact he hangs around Patsy I consider him both a fag and a cuck.

True, forgot that, but I'm sure you, me and and any normie can think of more creative uses for tk than the average comic writter.

Or than Kate leth

This sounds like one of those things where Kate had absolutely no clue what to write, so this is going to be a mishmash of different stories from her friends and blog followers several quality Marvel writers and artists being shown as fever dreams.

I don't know much about Black Cat, but wasn't her father some type of crime guy and she hated that? Why would she then turn into a murderous crime boss? Because she got punched in the face?

Because Dan Slott is a faggot.

In Spiderman TAS her father was a cat-thief during WW2.

Someone got overzealous and lousy with inking, probably. Patsy's upper lips are so exaggerated that they kind of look like mustache.

If Hellcat is basically Kate Leth's blog, and that's why Hellcat never has any fights in it, then the answer is obvious.
We have to dress up in costumes, and punch Kate in the face.
DO IT FOR MARVEL.

I'm up for it. Uncuck marvel. One curbstomped SJW at a time.

Go to bed, Kate. No one will ever care enough to harass you.

Why this still exist?!

Because the labor is so cheap that the cost of producing it isn't much more than the cost of the paper it's printed on.

...

My poor Jubilee… What have they done to you?

In most superhero comics, the villain is someone has some kind of evil goal: the extermination of all life, driving people to violent chaos, whatever it is Kang and all of his Kang spinoffs do, etc. In Hellcat, the villain is someone who ate that sandwich that you were totally saving for tomorrow.

Morrison's X-Men is also a generally shit comic written by a guy who hates the X-Men and hadn't read anything since the Phoenix Saga.

I thought jubilee uses light

In the Power Pack reboot they hold someone in place on a moving space ship instead of throwing them. Works out to about the same thing though.

I want to know what happened to the woman in the bag of holding. The questions they asked were good! If it's unplesent (which it probably is), then why doesn't she start using it as a prison? An extradimensional plane of perpetual torment. That would actually be a good way to turn it into a weapon. If she would put the one person who can pull people out of the bag into it, escape would be impossible.

Was she even that, though? Do you like to rear your friends jabber on about everyone they've fucked? Especially from an affeminate blue-haired faggot, who probably is extremely overemotional about his partners. Though even if these were perfectly respectable relationships, and he spoke about them in a collected manner, I still don't think that bitch of a roommate would want to hear about them, no matter what sex they're of.

She got demutanized in House of M, then she became a vampire or some shit. Still, she is cute as fuck and I want my asian 90s girl untainted by this fuckery.

Anyway, didn't she had a child?

In this comic she does.
Who's the father?

His name is Shogo and he's adopted.

So… Jubilee kicks both the lookouts but to absolutely no effect, as when Fagneto levitates them up they show no signs of any discomfort, and the trio of idiot "heroes" then just stand there doing nothing as the lookouts warn the others, and basically just wait for them to arrive rendering their surprise attack utterly pointless.

At this point, someone just calling the cops would be a lot more effective.

What DID Patsy going there and not calling the police accomplish?
What did she do that police officers couldn't have done better?
With her gayfriend, their response time was probably less.
Due to their retarded methods, the criminals were tipped off to their presence faster.
Patsy is worse than useless.

So, seeing as the artist can't draw normal-looking clothes without looking like she either buys on a kid's shop or from a hippy, why was she allowed to design a superhero costume?

Do you really want to know the answer to that question?

She is the best cocksucker in the company I guess.