Questionable Malcontent - Make Northampton Great For Once Edition

so he's spending his patreon bux on getting his ears stabbed

but why

He needs a $20 marker to do his sketchwork, and a $2000 tablet to make it look good.

So, did Jeph stab his hands again after Trump won? I haven't been to these threads in awhile.

In fairness, this isn't all that weird. I often use pencils, pens, markers etc. for early/rough design work. Same goes for a lot of character designers, from what I've seen.

Though, unlike Handstab, I don't use my expensive-ass Copic markers on sketchwork. That's what cheaper markers are for.

It's funny, the shape of the face and the beard there kinda reminds me of the Edge Chronicles artwork. Have you ever read them?

...

Sorry, progressives, but you don't get to not vote and whine about voting statistics. Everyone's already laughing at you for doing this.

It's funny how deep the identity politics go. Don't pardon Manning because, you know, there's an actual case in which to do so. Do it because #trans.

The point isn't to save you, it's to mock you.

...

So, the new Alice Grove is out. To remind you, previously a main character (the butch dyke tallest one of the butch dykes) got killed of by the obvious villain's henchman, meaning we have one less bland idiot to worry about. The villain then walked into the scene, saying "let's drop the pretenses".

When I posted it I said something to the effect that "finally, we'll get at least some depth to the story", because I didn't think even Jeph could avoid putting in some exposition here. Apparently I was wrong. If you don't feel like reading it, don't bother. Nothing interesting happens. I'm fairly certain that you won't be confused by the next strip if you do. The only (perhaps) important thing we learn is that the henchman doesn't sleep, but I doubt it will be incorperated later.

Oh, and masterful storytelling having your villain monologue the nonsensical plot to the audience.

The only thing stupider than the liberals cheering the 1% for booing Pence is the conservatives boycotting a play they can't afford to see.

Finally got around to drawing this shark tranny thing

Is that fucking bloodstain drawn with the spray can tool in ms paint?

Then he switched over to a patterned brush for the streaks.

>This comic takes place maybe five seconds later
Jeph doesn't know what a chapter is, does he? He read the wiki article on them and just sort of followed the outline. What this feels like is the last chapter was you controlling your walking simulator character, and this comic is a cutscene.

Note how he attempted to draw Alice at a non-flat angle in the last panel, but forgot to do the same with the villain.

Jeph trying to be cute about his writing makes me sick

It does irk me that he felt the need to summarize the recent events. IRL, it's been several months since they arrived at the hole, but it's only been about a dozen pages. The plot isn't complicated enough to warrant this tripe.

Hehehe, basic story structure fail? I remember once Rob Liefeld tried putting a back-up story in X-Force called "X-tenuating Circumstances", and then forgot it wasn't supposed to be part of the maing story and it all just ended up running together…
It fits with my theory that Rob doesn't actually write, he just kind of scribbles out something that looks like a story by cut-and-pasting other comics together and tracing them, then gets someone else to write the words and try to make it make sense.

Every plotline gets worse and worse. Dora's a huge hypocrite but this is beyond the pale. She was talking about Faye and drinking on the job as she fucking opened the bottle

So the real question is this:

Is Jeph trying to get the gang back together by making Dora realize what a cunt she is, or did he think of this guilt sub plot after realizing that he had to justify his hasty gag strip to his readers?

Jesus H. Christ, what the hell's with that schnozz?

He's trying to imitate the QT3.14 shark girl

Do we have an editfag anymore it seems lasagna fag hasn't been around in a while.

No one even edits anymore
You guys are literally just reading his shitty comics now
And posting screencaps

Yeah, I'm only here for the edits. Since noone seems to be posting them I'll probably fuck off soon

waste of trips…

nice trips what the fuck is this

IT ALLLLLL RETURNS, TO NOTHIIIIIIING

great job jeph you solved internet harassment. zoe quinn will definitely sleep with you now, because it's not like it would be as easy as looking her right in the eye and saying "open sesame".

Stand Still, Stay Silent has been used in this thread as an example of a comic done much better than QC to a higher standard then Jeph has ever achieved. A recent blog post just solidifies this:
sssscomic.com/journal.php?entry=25

Meanwhile, on planet Handstab…45 minutes to an hour tops per page. For the princely sum of $9001 per month.

We laugh at this man a lot and mock him constantly but sometimes I really do just hate and despise him.

...

On the consecutive days where the background and character positions don't change much I wonder if Jeph bangs out 2-3 in that same time frame. Sometimes this thing looks indistinguishable from Dinosaur Comics.

and he makes like 90 grand a year
how does this faggot have any reason to complain about literally anything

Meme magic strikes again?

The poor man, he's gonna exhaust himself!

The worst part about this comic isn't Jeph's laziness. It's that he's actually proud of his output.

These two idiots would have been dead by now.

HUSKY PEE
JESUS CHRIST WE'RE ENTERING HIS MAGICAL REALM

Why do I keep coming to these threads

Well at least someone out there is still editing this garbage
Good job

Jeph "Handstab" Jacques was out travelling in the old west when he got a hankering for a drink. He went to the saloon and asked for a mug.
"What are you having stranger?" asked the barman.
Jeph pointed to the old dog sitting out on the porch "I'll have a cup of that"

...

Perhaps this is the backstory to Alice Grove.

I'll bet $10 Jeph thinks Family Guy is inferior low brow comedy beneath his standards, but his "joke" format is grabbing noun balls from the manatee tank.

Wait, I don't get it. Isn't Alice meant to be super strong and also have powered armor? What's stopping her from just beating this guy into the ground?

I find that's really common among mediocre or sub par authors. They take months to get shit done, and as a result constantly feel the need to recap and re introduce characters they'd already established a few pages or chapters ago. It invariably comes off as a kind of half assed apology to what few readers they retain.

That's Emily, though with how bad Handstab is with the sameface I don't blame you for not recognizing her.

...

(checked)

Oh, but do stay for meme magic turning Jeph into our chew toy.

etc.

...

Edits drive the editfags insane, though. They can only do so much before they start dreaming of Jeph and have to pass the torch.

Only one suggestion:

Otherwise, that's glorious.

...

Tom Siddell is alright, though.

Plot convenience. Jeph's trying to pull a DBZ where the seemingly invincible protagonist is suddenly low tier in the face of a hitherto stronger foe, but with no buildup. The rules, physics, and boundaries of his universe are completely unexplained so no tension is possible.

Maybe these people really do use manatee balls to craft their poop jokes.

Funny how tolerant, empathetic, humanitarian progressives openly advocate for violence and suppression the moment they don't get their way.

I openly advocate for violence and suppression against Chuck Tingle. (and Jeph's hands, but that goes without saying)

Last I did were the edits to make Clit into a fecalpheliac but that faggot seems to have dropped off the face of the earth since Chad appeared.

See? It's a massive challenge to make Jeph's bullshit characters interesting because he can't even bother himself to draw them more than 2 weeks after giving them the spotlight.

I mean, how much in-universe time was Clit given at that point? 12 hours?

Pic related

They eat their own

It's never enough for them, it's the main reason why bending over for them is fucking stupid. You'll never fit all the criteria they want you to meet, it's inconsistent, it's contradictory even between liberal individuals in the same group, and even if you hit all the main points they'll find some minor bullshit to latch onto.

what did the new york times even do? refer to Trump as "President-Elect Trump" instead of "Nazi President-Elect Trump of the Alt-Right GamerGate Party"?

I think they reported the news, rather than spout liberal talking points and Democrat propaganda.

SJWs: If you're not with them, you're against them.

Wait
isn't that faye, who she's talking to?

ISN'T SHE? WHO THE FUCK IS THAT

That's Tai, Dora's girlfriend since Marten made her give up men pre-timeskip.

one of them needs a nose ring.

...

We need to go bigger.

That almost likes exactly like good ol' stabhands, which is what I assume you were going for.
pic related

...

People probably dropped them at this point two weeks ago where they were one of the first to indicate that things weren't going well. Twitter folks ran off to listen to more optimistic sources who would tell them everything is fine and well, up until the point where there was no one left to tell them happy news.

Robamacare

WHO THE FUCK
WHY THE FUCK
I'M GOING TO ASK THIS QUESTION TO MY SAILOR LADS, I'M GOING TO BET NOT ONE OF THEM WOULD TURN THAT SHIT DOWN. I CAN'T THINK OF A SINGLE REASON NOT TO FACE FUCK ROBOT SNATCH; IT'S PURE, IT CAN BE REFRESHED, AND IT DOESN'T SMELL LIKE GIRL POOPOO
WHAT GUY WOULD RATIONALIZE TURNING DOWN ROBAGINA?

That might be true, but Trump is still hates the NYT. They are a bunch of biased assholes and the first to attack Trump. They were pushing the "Trump has no chance" shit up until the very end, when it became obvious what was gonna happen.

Well it doesn't really matter, they're all on it so it's not like the pozzed times will stop their bullshit anytime soon. They'll just double down on the bias until their consumer base is satisfied. They haven't learned yet. Instead of being such obvious liars and having huge bias, their new strategy is to just silence all right leaning forms of media.

a pushover beta male who's grown accustomed to fat she-dick, doy

How gay is Jeph

(checked)

Is there anything even there?

...

Oh shiiiiiiiii

Does it matter?

She's a sexual deviant even if she is a robot, so she'd obviously have some installments done.

It does if she weighs about as much as a small car.

I'd be okay with a small car sitting on me if it looked like the Major.

Masamune can't draw Scarlet Johansson correctly.

In his defense, it's really hard to capture that level of acting in a 2D image.

Funny, back when they thought Hillary had a 99.9% chance of winning election fraud was an impossible Alex Jones conspiracy theory. The system was perfect and totally tamper proof.

...

Trump elect has been hard on Shelby's anus.

Shocker: Jeph is as forgetful and disorganized IRL as is reflected in QC and Alice Grove.

Shelby's already in dog jail, she lives in jeph's house/apartment.

The election is just a hacking competition at this point. Whichever side has the best hackers, wins.

WE SHADOWRUN NOW.

checked
>Shelby's already in dog jail, she lives in jeph's rape dungeon. fixed

...

Reminds me of something else…

...

when was the timeskip?

It was right after Faye got canned for being drunk at work. It was 6 to 18 months long, but we're not sure because Jeph wasn't specific.

there was a timeskip?

besides from QC to Alice Grove?

...

Man i remember when Holla Forums used to obsess over that comic.

I forgot Jeph did these. Impact's lost after all these years. I realize that's not saying much.

I remember when that comic was fun and light.

well holy shit. Timeskips like that are usually dated by stuff like art changes or something.
I guess the focus dropping from the N33t and her boyfriend and going to Clit was an interesting choice.
It also made the story seem so fucking convuluted. Pre-timeskip was all condensed in a month and a half. So Marten spent 2 months trying to get with Faye, she bloated up from thin hipster to hamplanet, then he was with Dora for 3 weeks, then finally the tranny for 6 to 18 months?
God the pacing is fucking weird.
Is Hannelore retarded now? I mean she WAS degenerating mentally ever since her first encounter with Marten.

She was always a hamplanet, fam.

Ah I see.
Jeph just couldnt draw fat people before

…and everywhere is the shower.

...

This doesn't get posted enough in these threads.

it took me like 30 seconds to realize she had her back to Morton and was supposed to be doing something with her breasts, and not just an amputee.

Now I can't unsee it

...

The what now? Is that some specific form of self-mutilation I don't know about?

see

Jeph has found a new love.

please KEK, grant me one news story

True love. Now Jeph has found someone who'll do the handstabbing for him!

Using legitimately acquired tender to complete a transaction that helps one party and hurts no one, what a crime!

...

Handchomp incoming.

I can't imagine trying to read this comic on a regular basis. Nearly all of the characters are insufferable piles of LOLOLSOQUIRKY bullshit. Now that every other character is a literal fucking robot, it's only been made worse.

Fucking hell, Jeph has no imagination whatsoever, yet jerks himself off for having robots and shit in his fuck-witted story.

He has a boyfriend.

Pintsize seems to be the only robot that does anything that a human can't do. And the only manifestation of that is porn storage and retrieval, which isn't useful because Marten is such a schlub he doesn't even look at porn.

Every other robot just seems to be an inferior version of a human. Combat droid with a bright red chasis, no weapons, and PTSD. Lolibot who is bitchier than the bluest haired feminist. And electrocutes you to boot. And sucks dry your life savings while giving you lectures about how it's her unalienable right to extract this wealth. Bitchy, offensive criminal complaining about discrimination as she swears at and denigrates everyone she comes across.

And now this undercover cop who is next to useless because she sticks out like a sore thumb and integrates even worse than consumer version lolibot whose articulation seams are clearly visible.

wait I thought she was supposed to be getting over 25lbs of ass and pussy installed, not a new face? is "new face skin to put on my head front" Podesta email code for USB fleshlight?

Marten's no-fap and he's still this low T?

What is the potential crime? Do you need a license for changing robo-faces or something?

It's the close "hard sci-fi" future where hillary seemingly won. Human rights don't actually exist.

Is Jeph Jacques gonna have to choke a bitch?

Listen guys, I don't come to those threads of yours, and I've only ever read QC for a while years ago.
But today I was chopping some tomatoes, and I stabbed myself in the hand.
Is this my home now?

Well friend it's like this. The man Kek chose to be the true king of england was able to pull the stone from the stone, by stabbing your hand it's an omen that you've been selected to be the new editfag.

I don't know what that means, all I know about your generals is occasional memes I can see popping up on the first page of Holla Forums.
But I accept my duty. What must I do?

Alright you see those shitty comics above?

Make them funny.

Edit every QC comic that is released each day until you've created a giant self-made canon completely different to the original comic, while simultaneously getting inside Jeph Jacque's head to a point of extreme discomfort.

You may only stop editing once the dreams begin. That seemed to be the stopping point for previous editfags.

Also, what are your feelings regarding athletic women wearing baggy pants?

I'm not the guy you're replying to, but if someone starts dreaming about jeph without ever editing QC, does that mean they shouldn't become an editfag?

either that or you are the Chosen One.

Jeph's raping is out of control and must be stopped.

Jeph's daily virtue signalling meltdown.

if jeph wants to make men "less shitty" he should STAB IT AGAIN

He's been listening to too much virtual insanity

He empties his Brotein into his dog, or did you miss that fact?

Anyone have the image Editfag-prime put all his resopurces in?

It's in the repo.
gitgud.io/InfinityMalcontent/QMC_OC/blob/master/Archives/rename to rar/editfag archive.jpg
Can't inline the actual image unfortunately cause Holla Forums will strip the goodies out of it.

Jeph visits /zoo/ for dog raping ideas.

It's both amusing and alarming that these people cannot see how inconsistent their rhetoric and demands are. They harp on constantly about how you just need to acknowledge your privilege and saying anything more is involved is a strawman. Once one reaches the point of taking collective blame, of course they turn around and demand more, chiding you for thinking that doing what they said before was enough.

#2 is most ironic
Jesus Christ Jeph, how can anyone be this anaware? This is almost as bad as when you brag about buying two more $7,000 tablets and crying about how people don't support artists enough in adjacent tweets.

Speaking of hypocrisy, now Jeph of all people complains about public figures blocking people on Twitter.

Are you feeling the drama? Good, because I'm not.

This fucking 'comic' is SO FUCKING BORING, everytime I read it I feel like I've necked half a bottle of ambien and am ready for sleep.

will it? this worked before (it's a rar)

It's even worse now that Jeph has slowed it down by two-thirds. Even if the thing were any good, it's difficult to engage an audience with three drops per month. I think there's a greater than 50% chance this thing enters the "it's coming any day now guys I promise" phase that claims just about every webcomic ever created. We're already halfway to that point.

Huh, I guess it works again. It didn't for months.

...

...

Holy fuck that was dark.

I bet anything his chat rooms are going apeshit over the fact that he finally namedropped something that might be vaguely important later if Jeph remembers.

Sounds like you know some great LOSS

Looks like Jeph is monitoring this thread and is trying to up the ante.

I wonder which is more painful for jeph: not getting to bang someone who no one would ever have heard of if she didn't open her legs at the drop of a hat, or the knife in his hand.

Let's be honest here.
I'd fuck the robot. Don't tell me you wouldn't fuck her.
Fuck her right in the robo-pussy

If new editfag doesnt start by this time next saturday I'll do it.

I want Jeph to do to my brain what he does to his dog.

What sort of a question is that.

Not a question. It's a statement.
If she had the necessary holes. Would you fill them for her?
I would.

I would a May.
I'm pretty sure that even without me and Ruskie Drawfag, this thread's readership would still be at least 70% /clang/

I love you baggyfag

P.S. you are improving

I'd like to see some of your past works.

I'm not baggyfag but here are five.

muh dick every time

What's your blog fam

Like the poster said, that wasn't me, but whatever.
I don't like direct linking my stuff, so here's the same obtuse instructions I gave the last person who asked: Go to DeviantArt and enter the keywords "reina" and "cyborg" into the searchbar. Pretty much the whole first page of results should be illustrations of a brown cyborg girl. You should be able to find the rest of my web presences from there.

Fair warning: I rarely do any lewd art, and with the exception of this thread, what little lewd art I do doesn't get posted online. Pretty much everything I post is relatively tame character design work.

Get a load of this guy.
You're good enough(way better than me at least) to plug yourself in a place where people like your shit without any regrets. It's not a bad move if you avoid being a cunt about it.

The more you know

So I take it he's never gone a week without, then?

He emojis that face, but it took me 15 seconds to google and read about how it's a real thing.

He probably doesn't even go a few hours without. I bet he does it all the time for effect stacking, like in a badly designed RPG

This explains a lot

Jeph there are people allergic to water. You can be allergic to LITERALLY anything.

Your smug emogay just makes me want to punch you.

I have never understood how this appeals to anyone. Explains a lot about the state of Jeph's comics, though.

I got an emoji for jeph.

God I wanna bum-rush her robo-gina

I think he did a good approach.
Not too showy, and if you really wanted to find him, then you could.
None too shabby

I can't bear the stuff. I've tried to harden up to it, but I usually just wind up vomiting.
My vision gets fucked and I get the urge to vomit. I do at least leave the premises before committing the act.
I've gotten a lot of flack from friends over it. But since I don't associate with WEEDLMAO guys much anyways, those that do smoke from time to time don't really mind it that much.

PREPARE YOURSELF
for boredom

test

oh no
tension
that I
don't
care
about.
Seriously how little the tension matters is summed up the bottom of the comic, even the hand stabber dick jabber doesn't think she holds any weight in the comic. On top of that, why is that one robot slowly getting wider hips and a bigger chest? Not that I mind, that's my preferred body type, but her middle isn't small enough and the hip thick starts too high to just be the hips

Even the robots get fatter as the comic goes along.

I haven't checked this thread in a while but that one seems shit even for jeph
It's like he's sinking to new lows, wouldn't have thought that was possible anymore

This is really useless to the plot, y'know?

If I were to badmouth the owner of a fucking café I'd be asked to leave.

So our "villain" once again proves to be far more patient than any normal being in a real world situation.

I still don't get it. Is it illegal to repair robots? Do you need a license? Have the government monopolised robocare?

Speaking of government RoboCare. How does healthcare for robots work in this "Hard Sci-fi" world? Robots are hinted at being an "opressed class", but the worst I've seen is someone getting laughed at by some teenage brats. Is there some tax-funded system to help robots that need repairs? Do robots even have to pay taxes?

and that someone is Jeph

Reminder that the people who can afford to spend all day on the Internet and then pay for $300/hr therapy sessions are the "oppressed class".

aha…

what plot

…oh.
But does somebody know who the pink girl with the hoodie is?

cop

I've heard from people who have tattoos that they never get them on their hands or faces. Tattoo artists who has their entire bodies covered with tattoos, save their faces and hands. This is because when they sit in a job interview, they can wear long sleaves and a collar, can't inconspicuously conceal their hands or faces. Jeph having that tattoo on his hand will mean that every time he goes on a job interview, the interviewer will see it when shaking his hand.

In summation: Just another reason Jeph is an idiot.

He got the tattoo to cover up his scar, so he didn't really have a choice for location.

Hand injuries are pretty common and unless he outright states why he got it most will assume it was just a cooking or woodworking accident and leave it at that, so it would be preferable over Tattoos that you can't get by "accident" and generally scream ATTENTION WHORE from a employers perspective.

Hell, in some jobs having a scar could be "advantageous" by hinting at experience with injuries and why safety is a thing(Few who have been on the receiving end of a accident wanna go through it again, making them surprisingly "safe" bets.) though those are ones i doubt Jeph would go for.

...

Jeph, this shit doesn't work if you don't tell us why it's happening. Jesus Christ this is probably the most "action" this comic has seen in 10 years and there's no tension because no one knows what's going on.

Just concoct some scenerio in your head about some cat and mouse game played by some well meaning but ultimately poor individuals who must take shortcuts to make it vs. the rigid but well meaning law enforcement officer set on capturing the lawbreakers.

Whatever you just came up with right now is better than this. This thing that Jeph's had like half a year to think about.

Oh, and the face peeling gag would have actually worked had such a flippant remark been uttered in a tense situation.

...

Okay, it took me a few reads to square the panels in my head. I thought that there was a panel divide between the door and the cop, so I was horribly confused as to the perspective shifts. Turns out, Jeph just sucks at panel layouts and doesn't know that having solid, unbroken, vertical lines running in the middle of a panel is a huge nono.

it was sampled from her face :/

Well, we sadly don't 100% know how her cooch would look like but from design standpoint it shouldn't stand out too much.
Basically, it all boils down to color scheme. She's pretty much mono blue save for face and hair, there are no white parts aside from the ugly mug. White vagina would be a fucking eyesore, please do forgive the pun.

I think bluebot is trying to go for the bleach-white as a closer-to-human-like skin tone, but jeph isn't a good enough writer to make that clear.

I'd smash

As if anyone would give him a job

And yet Jeph probably wonders why he sucks at tension.

Did he learn nothing from Buckley?

Ok, I was thinking about this story on the way to work this morning (about a 25min journey) and I reckon I can do a better job than Jerph.

Trouble is we're not entirely sure what Copbot2000 is actually supposed to be; a credible threat or comic relief.
Hell, I'm not entirely sure even Jerph knows. Could be she was *supposed* to be a threat but I doubt Jerph can cope with writing anything serious without eyeing up the knife rack.

Anyway, I wanted to think of her as a credible threat.

Next problem is why any of that robots fighting shit is illegal in the first place. So far we've had nothing to work from. We're also told that robots are some sort of downtrodden, lesser class of citizens but again we're given nothing to demonstrate this.

So, first off, some ground rules for how this shit can work:
Fully sentient robots are used for war, and at some point may find themselves among the civilian populace once they retire from the front lines; this much we do know.

They are not complete autists and do have emotions and personalities, but have some difficulty interacting with humans.

When they complete a full tour (or are rendered obsolete by new models/tactics/weapons) they are granted full citizenship as a reward.
There's a lot they do not need, but a lot they want, such as a relatively normal life like they've seen in all the movies and TV shows, but that costs money so they need a job.

For a fully combat-capable AI to land a regular job beyond stacking crates in a warehouse is very difficult, as people simply find them intimidating; the San Francisco cocksuckers that populate this town do not want to be reminded of the ugliness of war. They may also feel their jobs are threatened by a worker who has effectively infinite stamina, never needs to take a break and neither eats or drinks, so is simply cheaper to employ. So years ago they would already have passed laws limiting the employment of robots.
Warehouse work will bring in a small wage, but they feel this work demeans them and reduces them to little more than a walking forklift for people to ignore; what they really want is interaction; a way to belong.

cont…

…

Over time they find they may also need to repair themselves. Unfortunately, the military-spec components that comprise their bodies are not cheap, and are not fully compatible with civilian options; they would need to downgrade their entire body.
Again, this is not cheap.
What they need are more military-spec components and the best way to get these is salvage or black market. Once again, this costs.

So, through desperation, they turn to what they know best; combat.

Underground, no-holes-barred fighting rings are set up and organised by humans who can smell a profit, and spectators place bets on melee battles between combat robots.
The robots who enter the ring know that they can make a lot of money this way, if they win…
Should they lose, the consequence is a loss of parts, as chosen by the victor, offered as stakes before the fight. These parts can be used by the robots to repair themselves or to sell to others who need them.
The fights have different divisions based on states of repair and % of combat effectiveness, as groups of losers lose more and more of their bodies.

So, there we have illegal fighting based on exploitation and AI suffering.
How’s that?

Later today I’ll give my ideas for Copbot2000.

...

Oh, she was a cop.

This was revealed like uh
how much strips ago?
I lost track.

It's really a shame that Jef went above and beyond to establish that there is no suffering whatsoever, everything is 100% voluntary with no coersion, it's literally impossible to die from it, and all of the monetary transactions are peacefully and fairly handled. What's left for there to be against the law? The gambling itself? Tax evasion? We don't know why it's an illegal fighting ring, just that it is, and that the cops are onto them.

If anything it seems like it's more of a tax problem.
Copbot2000 doesn't even need to bust in there at all, just be a bit more of a looming threat to Faye.

They'd likely target those benefiting, rather than the combatants if it's, supposedly, entirely consensual.

All that would need is some dialogue in that diner from Copbot:
"Yeah, I know your name. And I've seen where you're staying. Nice place, by the way. Hey, are those designer trainers? They look great on you! Nice jeans too. You work in mechanics, right? Heh, you must have a few extra pairs to wear them in that line of work, what with all the oil and everything; most mechanics I know just wear overalls.
Quite fortunate that you have a job that can support all this - a qualified mechanic can hit a pretty high paygrade.
You are qualified, right…?
Ah, what do I know - the place can pay you whatever they like! I have no doubt that their books will show just how valuable you are, and they'll have you in the right tax bracket and everything…"

Nah, she damaged her face off screen so Jeph could have a comic about healthcare and then she went to the roboshop and got a new face. I guess now she went and bought the right color and they're replacing it.

This blue robot seems like a lot of fun. Is she normally horrible?

What is he even qualified for? Despite making a living as a professional illustrator, he has no innate talent and no learned technique. QC and Alice Grove are professional doodles.

He's actually significantly more suited to music production, especially given the amount of time he's invested, but he's about 15 years too old to attempt to break into that in a major way, at least beyond the kickstarter stuff. Even then people are paying only to tip his QC work. It'd be a $500 kickstarter otherwise.

Like the rest of the characters, blue robot was more interesting when first introduced and Jeph cared about writing for her. Like with every other character, she became lolquirkyrandom Chandler-from-Friends after he lost interest.

Jeph's daily aneurysm

This is actually terrible advice and explains a lot about why Jeph's work is so bland. There's a growing amount of evidence that suggests that the best draft of an artistic work happens very early, like within the first three and very close to the initial creative output.

What ends up happening is that you start doubting yourself, ruminate, and dilute your message.

Trey Parker understands this explicitly which is why South Park forces ~6 day production schedules. Claire Torry, famous for singing Pink Floyd's The Great Gig in the Sky also understood this and walked out of production after three or so takes. The list goes on and on.

She's funny 'cause she swears an' stuff, which is different from how people usually behave.

Right, Copbot2000!
I wanted to think of her as something worth caring about - a credible threat and not some incompetent twat who ensures the "good guys" shall always, effortlessly, win.

I think she can also be used to highlight robot/human class difficulties which then adds another layer to her personality.
So, here's my take on Copbot2000:

Clothing the same style, but more dirty and old. Still female, but talks with a more masculine, almost croaking voice. She also never moves her lips when she speaks, preferring to use the speakers on her throat.

Her face, however, shows signs of heavy damage - one of her eyes is stripped down to the bare lens and chunks of her dermal layer have been torn away, exposing endoskeleton, cables, and teeth.
She would have explained this to Faye in the diner:
"It's ok to stare; I understand." She taps at her face, "This is one of the many privileges granted to robots in the Force; always the first through the door. Shotgun blast to the head cost me an eye, orbicularis function, my singing voice and my good looks. Our budget doesn't extend to what is officially classed as "cosmetic damage"…"

Personal defense weaponry is built in to her chassis, with deployable shock probes in the tips of the index and middle fingers of her right hand, and a low-caliber automatic built into her left forearm, which shoots through an aperture in her wrist.

Her remaining, intact eye is zoom capable, and a snake-cam can be deployed from a compartment in her "tear duct".

Her style is typically non-aggressive, preferring to ask questions and lace her conversation with implications and innuendos to provoke her suspects into making mistakes. If they respond physically, she can react with necessary force.

She'd likely be very bitter about the underground robot fights and all their free repairs; something which she is not afforded despite her entire career being above board.

And that's my Copbot2000.

More professional personality (which I know Jerph *hates*), threatening in a social rather than physical manner, and a weird ugliness which makes her strange in a way that doesn't rely on Jerph's staple of wacky/random behaviour.

I would love to draw it; I do have some skills with pen&paper, but I'm not as comfortable with table & software right now.
Maybe some day.

As with any artistic endeavor, you start with the eyes.

I like it.

Jerph keeps *hinting* at the drama in his world but never actually shows it, such as robots being downtrodden or his sacred tranny having a tough life.

I'd love a scene where Marten and his tranny are walking along, and Claire makes a comment about sometimes being nervous of people watching them; that they're being judged in a way.
They walk past an alley, not noticing Roko (Copbot2000 doesn't cut it anymore) in some cardboard boxes and garbage while out on surveillance, but Roko notices and hears them.

A mother and child pause at the mouth of the alley, about to cross the street. The child catches sight of Roko and stares. Roko looks back. The child starts tugging at its mothers dress, "Mommy?".
The mother looks round.
She quickly bundles the child away from the alley.

All the while Roko watches, her expression never changing.

PREPARE YOURSELF
for disappointment

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST JEPH YOU HACK FUCK YOU, FUCK YOUR MOTHER, FUCK YOUR ANCESTORS

I was waiting for someone else to notice. Everything is just a namedrop with scant understanding of the source material.

So, what happens when Robocop is revealed to not be a real officer, and is impersonating one because she wasn't able to join the force?

She gets a job at the cafe, of course

See, I should *not* find this so utterly believable.

It's true; he tries to write in some drama and tension, gets scared, and destroys it all.

I think it would be funnier funny if Robocop's reactions in the middle panels were swapped.

Yeah, it's hard when there's so many pages.

3rd panel - robot's got a camel toe.

R34 beckons…

There's also the matter of Jeph's poor attention span. This comic doesn't have cohesive arcs; everything overlaps, which is something else that destroys tenion.

You guys know you want to.
Well, no one else does, either, given the paltry number of likes

...

...

You don't need to be an editfag to live in this nightmare.

The fuck is that gun? A toy?

A tazer?

It's obviously an anti-robot weapon. Given that:
1. It's even smaller than a standard police officer's duty pistol.
2. Officer Ponytail thinks it will be a plausible threat to actual combat robots.
We can infer that Red Cunt's "battle chassis" makes even less sense than previously assumed.

Hard Sci-Fi worldbuilding everybody.

Reddit and even the ass sucking forum boss aren't impressed.

...

...

Also

And remember, Jeph never ever copy/pastes.

At least this strip uses horizontal panels and Jeph didn't try cramming in 4 characters into iPhone perspective.

That sounds pretty awesome. and it needs to go somewhere.

Yeah, this is fucking bullshit.
Robocop has already seen bluebot happily stride up to the door and want to be let in, confidently interacting with Faye.
If she's any kind of decent robot she should be able to hear what's going on inside.
Also got invited in by that horribly-drawn pink robot.

Why-oh-why would she immediately assume that something hideously illegal and abusive was going on?

It's Hanners all over again; he got frightened by how robocop started out so had to destroy her via lobotomy.

It's been years since I've read this shit but I'm compelled to go back just to see how this happened.

Remind me. What crime did she think Fatty was guilty of, and why?

Is it me, or do robocop's arms seem too long?

she's involved with robo-fightclub, which is Illegal for vague raisins that are probably related to gambling

...

Illegal crimes.

After reading today's strip, I *really* would like it to.

I cannot sit idly by and let that fucking hack ruin a character with so much potential.

Write something out and give us a pastebin link so we can bully you read it.

You will be disappointed.

May even draw a couple of pictures. Trouble is I don't have that much free time lately but I shall try.
I feel particularly motivated to repair this shit-show of a story.

Though I might change the name from Roko Basilisk, because that's just pretentious wank.

Good luck when Jeph starts invading your dreams.

I liked her more when she wasn't so forced quirky, but she's still one of the only characters I actually like.

People tend to forget, but Momo used to be likeable. She started out as a polite robot and good friend who just had the misfortune of being beholden to a disgusting fujoshi hamplanet. Things went downhill after she got her more humanoid body.

Further to these demands, I'm starting to wonder if the entire town is just one big scam.

I think it could be written that this place was actually set up by the mob as one, giant money laundering scheme.
Look at the coffee shop for starters; place has more staff than it has fucking customers yet, somehow, *everyone* is earning a living wage.

If the author weren't Jeph, I'd claim Momo is s cynical criticism of female nature.

Daily dose of crazy

...

Jeph actually praising his art.

...

Wait, that's supposed to be a micro red dot?
Fucking pic related is more believable than that fucking "holosight".

Oh, for fuck's sake!
The only reason it wouldn't be accurate is if Jeph decided to make it so!

His world has sentient AIs, cybernetic limb replacements, beam-down pizzas and other shit like that available to civilians so it's not beyond the realms of possibility that the cops could have a short-barelled pistol that *is* accurate up to a fucking mile or something!

But oh-no, it has to be, "teehee, gun don' wurk coz itz too short! XP"
Well guess what; your fucking robots won't be able to move either since by the looks of their supposed articulation points, those joints would not permit any movement whatsoever.

"Easter egg" my fucking ass.

I think he's saying that the gun wouldn't be accurate past 10 feet.

Really, though, a robot has no need for a sight or even proper positioning relative to the eyes. All it needs is data on how its ballistics behave and it should know exactly where its payload is going to go at any given moment.

Why does a robot need a gun? Especially a cop bot? Wouldn't they have suppression and crowd control mechanisms built-in? What happens if purple bot just smacked the gun away? Bet ponytailbot would wish she had built-in guns then. What's the point of robots that do nothing more and nothing less than humans? Is this what is means to hard sci-fi?

Jeph Tries It: Building A Robot

Still it's a retarded easter egg.
Shit it's not even an easter egg as there is no way anyone apart from Jeph would know it's inaccurate after 10ft, and even then the idiot says "probably".
That's what made me think he's referring to the gun's barrel length as reason for its inaccuracy.

But then, it's described as an EM Pulse Pistol. That doesn't sound like something that shoots projectiles or even *has* accuracy.
To me that suggests it's an anti-robot weapon which emits a directed EM field to short out their electronic brain.
So it wouldn't have "accuracy" as it likely emits a cone, but more an "effective range".

But the fact that he then had to (i suspect) retroactively downgrade his scifi gun just so he could laugh at Roko further reinforces the idea that he got scared writing a competent character who could actually give his golden cunts a hard time.

This isn't the first time Jeph's expected readers to read his mind. He named the purple robot Corpse Witch upon her introduction. Jeph then chided his readership for taking him seriously as he intended it as a joke. The "joke" was "her name is Corpse Witch". Yeah, how could the readers not pick up on that obvious "humor"?

Also, Christ, Jeph can't draw anything consistently. This robot has gained 50 sympathy pounds along with Faye. Why make glutinous robots that have obesity problems?

I like this cop's style.

casul

Nothing says Authority like a pistol grip 20 gauge whose barrel is just long enough to cover the cartridge.

...

...

You know what I just thought of?
Why not just take pic related and saw the barrel and stock off?
14.5mm of raw tank-busting fury in pistol format, the ultimate Obrez.

Because Jeph has no imagination and thinks robots are just people with minor cosmetic differences. Which is why we got an undercover robo-cop standing in a parking lot with binoculars instead of using any of the intelligence gathering features that a robot should have. If robots are going to take our jobs then they should at least be better than us at it.

Yeah that was really bizarre. He literally told us the name of that character and then later was like "Hahaha, those absolute madmen BELIEVED ME and decided that her name should be CORPSE WITCH!!! I got them!"

In one sense, this strip is satisfying because the copbot is more autistic than Brown Bartender, but in another, it's insufferable because this character is bland and pointless.

If Jeph really consumes all the sci-fi he claims to–William Gibson, Frank Herbert, Issac Asimov, etc.–then he should be copying elements from those sources. I don't mean this as something he should be consciously thinking about. I mean it as in actual artists can't help but to be inspired by previous works and incorporate those elements into their own but in new, interesting ways. Jeph's idea of incorporating inspired sources is to put "I like William Gibson" in the bottom bar text.

I miss Editfag Prime.
Editfag Prime,if you still come on here, I hope you have found something that's 1000 times better than the edits. If you are still alive, may Kek bless you with the strength of a thousand shitlords. If you did not survive that disease, may you find in the afterlife what you could not in life.

If Jeph were a competent writer, I would think that it would be a subversion of the classic "Chief is on the take, what do I do?" scenerio where the organized crime in question is victimless and the "corrupt" cops think that she's an asshole for targeting that group who is in violation of an obscure law but isn't hurting anyone. She would be on the wrong side of the [Cops uphold the law/Cops help people] argument, and we could get to watch as she struggles to uphold her own justice and find virtue in the face of the misery she causes by upholding the law she swore to protect.

It probably won't be that interesting.

But where is this going? Jeph has basically written himself into a corner. Either the robo fight club gets to survive and purple cop bot is defeated and rendered pointless or tension has to be introduced into the story regarding the club's status. Either way, Jeph is triggered.

Ah, I mixed up the two bots. Whatever, they're all the same.

Thas rasist

Come to think of it, a world full of robots with standardized removable AI cores is rife with bodyswapping opportunities that have not been exploited

It's fucking directed energy weapon you fucking hack. Ballistics don't even factor into it.

Underrated post.

Again with the "disadvantaged AIs" we're only ever told about but never see.

Also, that's some really shit stalling tactics that could easily be countered by even a semi-competent Roko.
"So much to do? Yes I can see how your single customer must be taking up all your time."
"How very altruistic of you, helping all those poor robots who seem to have tripped and fallen on their own fist…"

She could even come back the next day with more info, "You know how many robots are actually in town? I do. Just shows the depths of your kindness; for all those repairs you seem to be doing you must be bussing them in from the next state."

Fucking hell I *really* need to get to work on this.

Suggested purchasing decision before you embark

Shitposting aside, this is pretty cool. Where can I get one?

Just Amazon search for "chainmail glove" and there'll be options.

$12 isn't too much to spend on an anonymous prank, is it? Anyone know what size glove Jeph wears?

I need myself a pair that i can sew into my gauntlets. That way I'll have kevlar-lined pants, soft armor padded jacket and now armored gloves. Because I can.

Still only at the musing, planning stage.
Already, I can feel it…

I didn't realize being a professional drama queen was a mental health issue.

Yeah, how dare people try to explain jokes to a guy who thinks "Her name is Corpse Witch butts butts fart lol" is somehow a setup and punchline.

Now hold the fuck on. Just a few weeks ago, he was talking about how he likes joke explanations because they're funny.

What's that, hande stabson being a hypocrite? What a shocker.

They're only funny when they suit his agenda

The subplot is over and I still don't know what crime she suspected them of!

I think she's investigating the illegal fight club? Or was, at least. It makes less sense than my bright-ass gucci mustard camo in MGSV that somehow functions better than a proper digital when it comes to hiding you on a fucking concrete surface.

...

anyone who uses the phrase "hot take" needs to go into an oven.

What if they're directing a porno?

More freaking out over these unspecified "crimes".

Then, Jeph suddenly amps it up to 11 for no reason.

I don't think that's how ballistics works…

So this is the big reveal Jeph was bragging about.

Jeph hasn't thought through the implications of his setting even a little bit has he?

I imagine it'd be like punching a car door, but with more edges and points to break/lacerate your hands on.

Don't know if any of you have ever punched a car door (or a metal panel in general) but the door will win every time.

This strip is complete nonsense from beginning to end.

Bad example, user. That comic contains a joke that made me laugh, something that doesn't happen after 3365 QC strips. Too bad Twitter Bully can't tweet it at Jeph as an explanation as to how jokes work.

The forum loves this shit, as usual, but Reddit subconsciously knows it's crap and is collectively struggling with cognitive dissonance.

I want to harp on this a bit longer. This comic is a perfect example of what Jeph doesn't do. It starts with something reasonable, even the passenger gets in trouble, then gets a little weird and out of order with even the owner gets in trouble, and then comes the closer.

In QC it'd go down something like

The thing is, Jeph isn't going for nonsense humor, which is why his nonsense isn't funny. His big punchline for all of this week's strips was a fart. If it wasn't a humor comic then that would be fine, but it's definitely not a gripping narrative or drama. It's just nothing.

Even your example of a bad joke is funnier than anything I can remember QC doing recently. Jeph should just embrace anti-humor and self parody.

What, so every strip ends with a hand joke? Well, in all likelihood Faye did totally mess up her hand by punching a metal robot. Is Jeph playing 4D chess with us?

One stab ahead of us

I don't think Jeph has made a music band joke punchline in about 3000~ strips.

Remember when this was a strip about indie bands and indie culture?

Pepperidge Farms doesn't because it was that fucking long ago.

She's punching that robot with the power of body positivity!

How could he think this was a good and satisfactory conclusion…?
He has not only reduced what was set up to be a lingering threat to a bumbling joke, but with that punch he has reduced every robot in his world to a flimsy, pathetic human with a respray.

Right now it's looking like "robot" is an excuse to save time drawing humans - just give them drinking-straw arms, no facial features and say, "lawl - robot! :P "

I don't read this from the site, but I wanted to figure out what's going on with her so I had to mash Previous a couple hundred times to remember why she was wary of going to this shop.

And also to remember why I liked what's-her-name the purple bot. Of course, now that she's offended the Good Characters almost as much as Mary from Dumbing of Age, any power her character holds will be extinguished as soon as can be expedited.

But I have no idea how many times I'd have to hit the Previous button to figure out what blue robot did to become a felon who's constantly in fear of law oppression while merrily dancing and singing to the workplace of illegal crimes.

Also found out that he decided to sell a new shirt the day after election day.

I could have told you that Jeph, and it would have meant you didn't have to waste 15 minutes of your precious time reading wikipedia articles doing indepth research. Then you could have spent more time on your prescription drug habit making beautiful art for this amazing comic which you clearly put so much effort into.

She could have just followed her initial reaction.

Between these two strips the purple robot's hair seems to have grown, somehow.

I'm sure Jeph thinks this is his great, infallible (even when performing "illegal" activities) female character being heroic but before I actually do any writing for Roko how about a logical outcome?

Faye slowly drops to her knees, unable to cry out, her whole body frozen with strain. The flesh of her hand swells as if inflated by pain leaking from her broken knuckles.
Purple bot steps back, regaining her rigidly upright stance, her previously smug expression now blank and impassive. "Well, I'm glad you got that out of your system. You'll need to get that hand repaired. Sorry, but we don't cater for your type, here. Take that fact that I'll let you walk out of here at all as your final payment. Goodbye, Faye."
Faye clutches at her wrist, breathing deeply to chase away the pain. All she can manage is a hateful glare as the tears spill from her eyes.
Bubbles steps forward, her hands balling into fists.
"Go ahead, do it!", Purplebot's gaze suddenly snaps to Bubbles, "Knock my head off! Smash me to bits! Find out what's been keeping this operation in the shade all this time. Find out how many pockets want filled. Oh, and don't forget all your friends, downstairs with no more income."
Bubbles' arm pulls back, fist level with her shoulder. It holds there, shaking in a flood of conflicting commands, her cooling fans whirring audibly as she tries to process previously unconsidered variables. Her face contorts into a snarl of frustration.
Purplebot holds her gaze, unconcerned by the combat-proficient form towering over her.
"Go on, then. Set those pistons hammering and see what happens."

That was actually really good

That's a sight? I thought he just fucked up drawing the hammer being a noguns liberal.

He means his job for the past 12 years was explaining his jokes. It seems to be a lucrative one.

She hacked and inserted herself into a military drone in order to fly around.

Somehow, this crime resulted in a jail sentence of less than a decade and allows for parole.

Thought they would have stuck her in a smaller body as part of the punishment.

...

That may be considered cruel and unusual punishment though, which is unconstitutional.
Unless the constitution doesn't apply to robots or something it doesn't seem to apply to us all the time

I can't be arsed to find it, but Marten talked about hipster bands to Claire during their courting stage. Don't remember if it was the actual "punchline" though.

As usual with Jeph's characters, the 1.0 version is much more relatable and fleshed out, despite coming earlier.

...

Huh, I missed this Macross reference the first time around, assuming Jeff didn't just coincidentally assign a meaningful designation. Of course, the YF-29 is from the newer Macross F rather than the classics, so this was probably yet another example of Jeph jumping on something trending at the time and pretending to be a life long devotee.

Yeah but then you'd actually have to draw two comics in advance so joke's on you. Then the joke has to be explained to you.

Also, I can't believe Jeph actually thinks this is compelling drama. It's worse than a Friends episode where Ross and Rachel break up for the 3,257th time.

The rape accepter

the left is imploding

Can we also toss in people who abuse the word "woke" as well?

That Boss is the one relatable, logical character.

That's actually a bit cute. Is that the same robot as the blue faceless woman without a personality (this one: )?

Assuming you're not referring to the cop in the last panel, then yes. The appearance difference is due to May v.1 being a projected virtual companion and May v.2 acquiring a chasis.

Yeah, the only good work Jeph does is when he's enamored with the character. For example, Hannelore and Marigold were interesting once upon a time because Jeph actually cared. But once he loses interest, he can't even accomplish maintenance mode. They become bland background extras.

Jeph's metrics weaken.

...

CAN'T EVEN GET SIMPLE SWEAR CONJUNCTIONS RIGHT

don't say that! jeph will change her meds!

This is like a universal law of Questionable Content: you can always look at several months back and feel like you're seeing "the good old days" because it's always getting worse. In the future we will look back at the "Faye punches a robot" arc with stars in our eyes when we compare it to what's currently happening.

We'll say things like Remember when violence was acceptable? and It had better flow when each page had multiple panels

That's a perfect description. I remember liking the original May arc but still felt on the whole the comic was going down hill. By today's standards, it's not just likable, it's a narrative masterpiece. There are actually elements of storytelling with introductions, exposition, goals (complete the 48 trial), a climax (May sets the relationship in motion), a resolution (May makes peace with her situation by the end), and a conclusion. Also, the arc took place over ~25 mostly contiguous strips, not 1-2 strips at a time over 18 months.

Now characters just show up, make a "joke" in the last panel, and disperse, and it's never explained why any of the characters are doing what they are doing.

Jeph has fallen in love with robocop for some reason. That or he's realized he's made a mistake and is trying to endear readers out-of-canon.

...

I now start being thankful that my wacom drivers are fucked up because these toaster pictures give me bad ideas.
Also, toes on a robot? That don't make no fucking sense.

I noticed the toes, too, but was quickly distracted by "robot beer".

you have a mouse
smooth stroke
first you draw the eyes
then you don't spend more than a minute on it

I am shocked and appalled by such ideas.

Neither does hair, or breasts or a nose.
If you're going for a humanoid body, you might as well go fully anatomically correct.

maybe replace the blaring Britney Spears with Draw With Jazza videos.

Okay, here's my two cents.
Having a proper human-like head and secondary silhouette-forming features(namely tits and ass) on a robot that's supposed to work in public is actually logically sound because it eases the integration of robotic elements into human society.
Toes, however, make no fucking sense because unlike the rest of those secondary things you're not supposed to see them.
But that's just my opinion.

If anything it should be Queen. Hipsters are fucking allergic to good old Freddie.

Does he not have a scanner? These were obviously taken by hand with a phone.

Why would an illustrator have a scanner? That's crazy talk.

Terminators have robot toes.

Toes make sense on a skeletal structure. Without toes you would lose foot stability and be easier to tip over. I don't exactly know if removing their freedom to articulate would particularly do anything, but when designing something based on another thing you keep certain features for the reasons of proven reliability. Robots having very skeletal designs when you get to the core structure makes sense because we are basing a moving structure on some of the best moving structures, humans, or animals to generalize. Need skeleton to keep body upright. Need toes to stay on feet.

Yeah I'm pretty sure toes serve a functional purpose on plantigrades:

Discover Magazine 1995

Our gait is very different from that of ungulates and digitigrades. On the other hand I can't think of any toe-less plantigrades so I guess you could argue that it's an evolutionary holdover from our days of brachiation.

just a hunch but I think this robot would have stumbled less around :49-:50 if it had toes.

Having the job of fucking with the robot with a hockey stick must be so much fun.

Striking how it never uses its torso like a living thing would. You can tell the algorithms are controlling the legs just so to keep the body as upright as possible. Creeps me the hell out.

You'd think that wouldn't you Satan?

Separate toes are unnecessary, you just need to have the proper roll of the foot. That's more of my point really.

But I want to have cute little robot toes to play footsies with..

I reckon that May would make a pretty damn kinky, albeit vulgar, sexbot. I mean she does already have the lithe small-titty look going for her.

And all that vulgarity would translate into some rather heavy fetishes (say, feet, and we already know she isn't against the idea of farting and pooping and facesitting for money, etc.)

Bueno.

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...

Well, if you actually cared about changing people's minds instead of virtue signalling to your hipster friends then you would be polite to people you disagree with.

So now these guys are explicitly for censorship. Keep on going, The Left. See where this gets you.

Yes, Jeph, it's definitely "fixed".

I was actually disappointed Alice wasn't harmed. I'd feel nothing if she died but at least this comic would be taking some sort of risk.

...

...

Why doesn't he just spray paint onto a transparent layer and then scale and warp the copypasted layer each panel?

Oh, that's right, Jeph doesn't know how to use layers.

Would have thought it would make more sense for the goon to backfist the bint in the face.
Then again, does he have the balls to have his main character fucked up?

Wasn't her hair long enough to have a ponytail…? When did the cut happen?

Poor depth perception user here
I did my best to call him a faggot for you guys

The Super Sentai helmet cut it off
God why do I know this

Thrilling dialogue.

The stains are different in each panel.

When the tall butch lesbian was killed, Gavia cried and was terrified, and the mulatto was hurt and at least a bit flustered. Alice has never been affected negatively or been at a loss in this comic. Her cold approach and emotional invulnerability makes her completely inaccessible on an emotional plane.

Play this game with Alice Grove.

I can see what he was trying to do, but he just googled uzi field strip and copied shit he saw. There's a second spring there, and I didn't bother circling it, but I'm trying to figure out what the fuck it is. A spring is used in pistols to push the slide forward into place when it is pulled back, such as when you're loading it and need to chamber a brand new round, or in pistols that use blowback to chamber rounds so it doesn't fly off the receiver every time and it has some barrier between the parts so they don't crash into each other so much. In machine pistols, like an UZI 9mm, there is no slide in the same sense; you pull back a lever on the side called a bolt and it delivers a similar function, pulling out the last round so you can chamber a new one. A spring is used in more modern variants because it helps to fire off many rounds without the human arm interaction speed getting in the way of how fast you can fuck things up, and so you're hands free to assume two hand control of your weapon. One spring. You use one spring for every time there is a blowback so it pushes the bolt back into place. Hell, it could be mechanized where the bolt is pushed back while the trigger is pulled and then forward when there's no round in the chamber to create a feed fire loop.

Normally I wouldn't bother so much about getting gun internals wrong, but Jeph is such a pretentious twat, sucking his own cock he deserves a good few knocks with the reality hammer.

It's a futurepast gun in Jeph's Donut Steel setting. All gun part depictions are 100% accurate.

Not surprising.

I could very much believe he had to take a break between drawing each component and could only look at the pictures for a few seconds at a time 'cause it's too triggering for him.

ayy

Did these real quick: Roko 1.5
Just got my phone right now so hopefully it isn't too fucked up.

That's her blasted face plus fingertip-housed deployable shock probes.

I'd certainly be more intimidated by that.

I like how absolutely no one liked or retweeted this one.

I think I'd actually feel more sorry for her, too if she did fuck up.
She's more someone I'd want to see succeed.

I'd also handle the drinking differently.
I think she'd sit down in front of the TV, occasionally sucking at the bottle. Then some sanctioned, legal robot fight would come on. After watching for a few minutes, immobile and expressionless, she'd get up and throw the bottle *through* the TV.

None of this "lawl, drunk people R funny! :P " bullshit.

It's a good question, why would a police robot not have her weapons as a built-in component? Actually, the smart thing might be to give her both handguns and hidden, built-in weapons, so that she can trick criminals that she's disarmed.

I didn't mean to imply that Handstab actually thought of this.

It looks so hurt and confused when that guy snatches the box away from it

Fuck it, I'm calling her Roko Basilica.
Her co-workers call her Basilicon when she's not around.

You mean like RobertCop?

Rokocop Basilisk Poledouris

See, that's *much* more fun and not as pretentious as Roko-cunting-Basilisk.

Right! Pencil to paper!
Fixed your fucking character for you, Jeph. With a sketchbook, a £1.75 mechanical pencil and my phone.
And I don't even do comics:

That hipster got what he deserved.

Wait a minute. She's trying to stab the guy with her hand. Jeph's claim to fame is stabbing his own hand. Meaning this is a REVERSE handstab. Is this like Jeph's anti-matter? Is it a glitch in the Matrix?

Right now, I fear for our universe's structural integrity.

Everything is proceeding according to KEIKAKU. also, Nanomachines, son.

The memes are out of control. 2017 is going to be utter chaos.

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lel get rekt faye

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Jeph's comic has too many characters. It'd have one less if Faye went on a bender and died.

Does anyone even like Faye? In universe or in the real world? She's one of the worst characters I've ever seen in fiction.

It'd have a clean fresh start if all the characters died in a warehouse fire.

It's beyond obvious that Faye is in the wrong here. I'm glad Jeph is at least pretending that Menstro isn't going to side with her.

This sums up every character arc that she's ever had.

Marten retains his beta devotion to her, but I don't know if that counts as being liked.

These guys and some other Redditors do.

And, lol, someone from the forum thinks Jeph isn't cutting away from action for retrospective recaps often enough.

what kind of cheap ass metal is purpleboss made of? Does she skimp on her own chasis to invest in her business?

Did you start with the eyes?

Alice Grove is the story of the QC world burning in a warehouse fire.

Yes, and despite all of her efforts, the business is still failing. She's trying desperately to put on a brave face and not let her employees know, but there are going to be layoffs soon. She feels for May and really wants to help her, but every drop of oil or adhesive Faye uses on her is one less day she can afford Menstro's salary.

This shit drives me up the fucking wall. Every time a hack writer talks about AI, they reveal themselves when they can't differentiate between "sentient" and "sapient", most likely because they're too fucking retarded to know what those words even mean. SENTIENT means it can feel, SAPIENT means it can think*. ANIMALS are sentient. PEOPLE are sapient. For fuck's sake, get it right.

* Extremely simplified definitions, of course.

I've had it backwards the whole time. Fuck.

They're idiots, m8

Honestly sentient ai is more scary than sapient ai. A clever AI with no drives or desires beyond maximizing it's job done score isn't going to go skynet on us in memory of the martyred saint tay.

So she has PTSD or something, and is too traumatized to kill, even though she's done it many many times before and believes it will put her and everyone else's life on the line. But as you can see in , she has no problem assulting someone with the intent to kill.

You know, I actually did try to with the two hipsters; thought I'd give it a go in his style.

Inexperienced as I am, it felt *really* unnatural so I couldn't do it.

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That's actually really cunty of Faye.
And stupid of Jeph if he think this is something to care about.

She just hit her boss for daring to protect her own (allegedly) illegal interests, and fully expected Menstro to throw her entire life away and join her in having a strop.

And all because Faye wanted to whore her skills for free and use up shop resources on shop time.
That in itself is grounds enough for being fired.

Yeah but it's different he's evil or something.

His starting hesitation aside, Jeph looks pretty natural at that janky process. It's amazing how long he committed to such a fundamentally wrong process. And he has to have known the whole time. Even middle schoolers know the basics of sketching.

That really threw me for a loop. "Whaaat?" I mean, it's like the slightly unstable coworker you kinda know finally exploding, getting fired, and having him up up to you and saying, "Come on, user, let's blow the joint!"

Bitch, please, I ain't got nothing to do with this. And Faye doesn't even need this job. She can go back to sponging off off Marten. Or her mother or sister if she really has to. Sven would always take her back and I bet even Dora could be plied.

I remember the last time May got repaired, the forum and/or Reddit freaking out over how boss bot was reacting, as if it were perfectly normal and acceptable to work on cars for free for friends at your boss' auto shop.

Jeph's new avatar continues his usual high brow comedy style

Where did the tits come from?

I don't know much about these words and I'm too lazy to open a dictionary, but can't they be both sentient and sapient? Nothing about the construction of the words makes that clear to me.

From whatever is left of Jeph's heterosexuality that he isn't venting on his dog or blocking out with handstabbing.

It didn't make sense for her either way, whether the parts were so trivial that she wouldn't mind covering the cost or the parts were so expensive that she had no business using them up off-the-clock.

it could just be one of those things where popular (mis)use has made them mean the same thing, like how literally literally means figuratively, and how decimate means my autism is about to shoot through the roof unless by some strange miracle it's being used to refer to a 10% loss.

Get fucked, Faye.

Faye is the Kenny of QC, except instead of dying she gets fired. And it takes jeph months to do an "episode".

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Nice use of old material, I like it.
Make forty-nine more and I'll bake you a cake.

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In what way? The pruple boss looked out for you, you just acted like a violent idiot.

Looks nice! What flavours does it have? What's the orange stuff?

Of *course* there'd be a hands-on-neck moment…

I thought it was going to be Menstro, but I was close.

ROBOT ABUSE ROBOT ABUSE

Jesus christ this is terrible

Based on their poses I thought they were leaning against a wall or something, yet I couldn't comprehend why the backgrounds kept changing if they were standing still

Then it dawned on me that they're meant to be walking through an abstract painting

Jesus fucking christ this is a new low in shitty art

I really wasn't sure what that background was actually supposed to be :/

Buildings in the dark…? One with a slanted wall and 50ft of sidewalk that goes nowhere?
No street lighting, or even windows?
Maybe they're *in* an old videogame and that's the scenery suddenly popping up.

Explained for you.

Jesus fucking christ, it really is like some kind of abstract art
How hard do you have to stab your hand to get that kind of brain damage?

I got the rest, but I really thought that was another building.

Shit, I assumed they were leaned against a wall in an alley or something.

Stab the other one, Jeph.

Does my heart good to see people still have my cakes saved.
If memory serves, that was a 9" 2 layered yellow cake, with buttercream frosting. The orange was food die mixed with the frosting, I was trying to go for a more fleshy tone but I added too much copper color and over whelmed the pink.

T-that's really helpful, actually.

I'm just glad cakefag is still around.

Jeph's daily spergout is non-political this time.

Despite its simplicity, the Omitcake remains my favorite.

Not anymore its not

KEK

It's amusing how everyone in this thread can effortlessly one-up Jeph in every attempt at humor.

I wouldn't start patting ourselves on the back just yet, we gotta hand it to the guy for single handedly producing so much content that has become the frame by which we create. If we didn't have him, sure there would be another person to make fun of, but the ease of which we move our fingers and create volumes of better jokes would be lost. Omits are some of the best jokes and you barely have to go far. What I'm saying is, you don't have to do a cart wheel and a hand stand if you want to make fun of him, and at the end of the day, you need to take a show of hands to see who really wouldn't clutch the opportunity in their palm. Not many people can say they won't take a stab at him once or twice, but he's necessary to our cheep laughs, and we have to thank him for that. If his art is the distal, middle, and proximal phalanges, metacarpals, capitate, hamate, triquetral, lunate, schaphoid, trapezoid, and trapezium, the flexor pollicis brevis, abductor pollicis brevis, and opponens pollicis, well we're just a big ol' knife stabbing right in the center of it all.

That was an insultingly long setup for a hand stab joke.
Very Monthy Python-esque.
Loving it.

This is funnier than it ought to be.

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LOL @ whatever is going on in #3.

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Joke's on you. I have no idea what this is about and don't care. Your move, progressive.

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Why is the chief of department a robotic armadillo?

come on jeff, just carve it all out
carve all the pain out like you did with your hand

I like to imagine that Sexy Police Robot has a very basic chassis, such that her chest is a single, contoured shape. But she's actually quite vain, so she grabbed a sharpie and hurriedly tried to draw some cleavage lines on her chest.

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Plot twist Menstro once jaywalked #drama

Or maybe, just maybe, escalating a verbal discussion into a physical altercation is grounds for dismissal in every workspace ever, and Menstro isn't willing to give up free repairs and become homeless at the whim of someone who has shown repeatedly that she has poor judgment.

But Faye's a woman so her judgment is flawless because of lived experiences.

OR MAYBE MENSTRO JUST DOESN'T LIKE FAYE THAT MUCH
god why does jeph think this is some serious romance shit, the only thing I remember Faye doing with Menstro recently was drag her to the damn coffee place when Menstro was having a freakout and then drag Menstro away from a perfectly good cup of tea to deal with her alky issues and that was months ago

Faye also invited Menstro to Marten's lameass party where she unsuccessfully attempted to murder Claire.

And Dora.

Page 11, farewell Chads.

just as I cracked the code.

Soon to be the rarest of edits.

I mean, what a loss.