Why is it that doing anything even remotely productive...

Why is it that doing anything even remotely productive, even so much as trying to be an expert player in a video game to play in tournaments/win money, is mentally, psychologically, or physically painful/arduous?

...

Say that to the twitch streamers and tourney players and e-sports reps who make six figures.

Get with the times gramps

Honestly it just makes me suicidal. I try to improve my life and the entire process apparently isn't supposed to ever stop and it's nothing but suffering. It makes me wonder why people aren't killing themselves left and right.
Every one of my muscle groups hurt right now.

My head hurts from reading and studying so much.

Ｓｏｕｎｄｓ　ｌｉｋｅ　ｙｏｕｒ　ｐｒｏｂｌｅｍ　ｉｓ　ｔｈａｔ　ｙｏｕ　ｗａｎｔ　ｉｎｓｔａｎｔ　ｇｒａｔｉｆｉｃａｔｉｏｎ．　Ｙｏｕ　ｃａｎ　ｍａｋｅ　ｍｅａｎｉｎｇｆｕｌ　ｃｈａｎｇｅ　ｉｎ　ｙｏｕｒ　ｌｉｆｅ、ｂｕｔ　ｉｔ　ｒｅｑｕｉｒｅｓ　ｍａｋｉｎｇ　ａｎｄ　ｍａｉｎｔａｉｎｉｎｇ　ｓｍａｌｌ　ｃｈａｎｇｅｓ　ｔｏ　ｙｏｕｒ　ｄａｉｌｙ　ｒｏｕｔｉｎｅ　ａｎｄ　ｆｏｒ　ａ　ｌｏｎｇ　ｐｅｒｉｏｄ　ｏｆ　ｔｉｍｅ．Ｒｏｍｅ　ｗａｓｎ’ｔ　ｂｕｉｌｔ　ｉｎ　ａ　ｄａｙ　ａｎｄ　ａｌｌ　ｔｈａｔ．

because these are competitive activities while you are a noncompetitive wimp who wants to stay in his comfy zone forever

I have had a similar experience user. The solution to your problem is to pick a line of work that you enjoy, so that the process of your work can be just as satisfying as its result.

Just stop worrying and enjoy games.

producing money isnt necessarily productive. A crack whore can make money by sucking dick but thats not really considered productive. Being "productive" usually implies that youre producing something for society or people around you.

Agreed. Long story short a little hard work never hurt anyone. But OP wants everything to be handed to him. I find hard work fulfilling. But I do 3D work for a living and I enjoy finding new ways to build/create things.

Does OP owe people around him/

Oh fuck off

I'll tell you a secret to being the best. Don't give a shit about winning. Just play the game and don't get emotional over it. Only want to win just to see how mad the other people get and show massive smug about it. All ways be an ass because shit, your playing fucking games for money. Your not like building a new form of transportation or doing anything to progress society. So just don't give a fuck and you will see. You will start to win games or become board of it. Play a game so much you know it so well you can just write a bot for it if you learned to program. If you want to become a "Pro" learn to shit-talk your rivals so when they make a mistake it pains them to.

no pain no gain.

die

Fucking Faggot
Earn something for once in your life

Can you be any more of a loser?

because it's not your soul's calling

I did this and no one will hire me, even with a degree in computer science. I'm just not normalfag enough.

Why do anything at all when all society does is parade PRIME TEEN PUSSY around in front of you. I'd even settle for fat 20-something pussy, but NO.

Why do anything at all when I don't have fat tits in my face.

PAY ATTENTION CAUSE THIS IS A BIG ONE.
Nothing easy was ever worth doing

because you are a genetic dead end
every woman will eventually sense your full impotent being and cheat/leave you as soon as she can

this is true
ive done the best at repetetive shit like games when i played like a script with the sporadic need to be cruel and smug
winning fast is good
winning a long game that you knew you had since the 5 minute mark is pleasurable especially when you see the enemy is trying and half decent