「I just want to go missing in the woods. 」

They're not fiction and that isn't their premise, you retard.

Why even live, Holla Forums?

They said the same thing about the Bible, but that didn't stop me either.

iktf. Succubi did nothing wrong.

Bigfoot doesn't real, but my erection does.

Can you just go missing in my basement?

moar old spoopy plz

Is it in the Pacific Northwest in some uncharted/barely explored wilderness?

It is in a "culturally diverse"(read no-go-zone) in Malmo, Sweden. The locals screech and spit at night at anyone passing by that does not share their tribe. Also if I do not brush my hair I look like the retarded little brother of Bigfoot. Sound exotic enough ?

This world is mundane as fuck and there will never be a big guy in the woods.
Paranormal, supernatural, magic, and miscellaneous lengedary creatures doesn't real and that includes ghosts, ayylmaos, psychic powers, loch ness monsters, mothball salesmen, witches and wizards that aren't LARPing, marmalades in the deep blue sea, and cuckacabras and the reason these things persist in the popular imagination is because of wishful thinking, immaturity, and a bit of psychosis. Anyone who ever claims this kind of stuff is real pretty much never fails to be an enormous faggot that should kill himself as they can never come up with anything but distractions and bullshit when pressed for actual evidence.

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Almost kind of spooky, tbh, but then I remembered you were a weak and powerless homosexual fantasizer.

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When the fuck did this shit hole turn to /x/ 4.0?
Was it the new css? Fuck mods.

Dude let's go together. You game?

There it is again! Just posturing. These kinds of hollow statements make for nice intellectual masturbation, but in the end what do you have? Nothing. You're just another faggot who couldn't grow up. Did Santa Claus bring you anything for Christmas last year?

We've explored like 5% of the fucking ocean, lad. They find new shit with new properties all the time and still can't make congruent sense of a lot of our scientific "laws". Some nerds recently breached absolute zero. Incredible in it's own right, and we haven't even incorporated the potential applications.
You clutching at semantics to feel smart and be boring is the real mystery tbh.

Would this be a sexual thing for you, posting shit like this?

the CSS is more /cyber/ than anything

Its comfy

You do realize that the /x/ community originated on Holla Forums, right?

I'm more than a little amused at you, but nothing twitching down there yet :^)

We sent then to their containment board for a reason.

Fuck off, newfag.

"we" aren't you, and you aren't the 4chan administration that we came here to escape.

I don't need to go that far to feel smarter than those who cling to fairy tales, tbh. It's like using a weapon at a boxing match against Stephen Hawking.

It's not like I wanted life to be so dull, but it is anyways. And you don't have anything to prove it otherwise, so why not bully annoying dreamers like yourself for acting like you have some secret knowledge? You all deserve it for never providing sauce, and I am happy to see those autistic reactions when such people are told your favorite fictional characters aren't real.

Thanks for confirming you're in the fee-fees house that semantics and unwarranted self-importance built. Didn't mention ghosts or ghoulies, just our collective level of knowledge. Magic and science, fedoranon.
On the absolute zero shit?
livescience.com/25959-atoms-colder-than-absolute-zero.html
Pretty fucking badass. If you need sources on the other statements, try searching "scientific knowledge 101" m'lad
bad news from the diagnostic wing. we're both terminal

>livescience.com/25959-atoms-colder-than-absolute-zero.html
Are you having trouble concentrating? This thread is about big guys in the woods and other related nonsense - not boring science fag news - and also the fact that you will never provide any sauce for the paranormal/supernatural/superstitious mumbo jumbo. None of you have any interesting stories or experiences. You're incapable of possessing a video that wasn't recorded on a toaster with 1x1 pixel resolution and 5 fps. I bet you don't even have a folder of spooky thread screenshots. You're all pathetic and deserve intense, nonstop bullying.

Look him up and visit the parks he talks about.

COLD WAR BUILDINGS

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That's because nobody feels like talking about another bullshit artist's Bigfoot fan fiction erotica.

jesus christ how terrifying

deliberately obtuse m8. enjoy the boredom i guess?

was going to post something else, changed my mind and didn't edit. my b

Dogman is such a bro

You cowards just don't have what it takes to hack it out there

Cowards deny reality and that's why Holla Forums turned to shit or perhaps it was always full of weak liars

>both serious and humorous
Get a load of this no funz allowed faggot shitting up the thread.

He doesn't talk about bigfoot dumbass.
Seriously, look up his missing 411 stuff, some spooky shit happens in a lot of national parks.

It was shit up long before he posted that pretentious codswallop.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Paulides

Here he is talking at MUFONLA or Mutual UFO Network Los Angeles. Like many other average horror/mystery fiction writers, he's decided to leave out overt descriptions of the monster/culprit. He's talking at venues such as this one, because it's not serious business and he doesn't intend to portray it as such. Instead, the gimmick here is a bunch of spooky stories with a *wink wink* and a *nudge nudge* that maybe it's a big guy in the woods, and if you're familiar with his previous work, it's definitely a big guy. Everyone who was paying attention to the context of who this guy is and what he has done previously saw this immediately, and the rest either looked him up to see if he was just selling bullshit or they naively gobbled up the jizz he put on paper as if it was the word of God itself. You are in the latter category.

How do you know?

you scared huh

How do you know I know, huh?

No, I'm bored, so bored in fact that I'm willing to go to a spooky place by myself. But everyone knows such a place doesn't exist, and you don't have what it takes to list spooky places where I could get lost and never seen or heard from again. Truth is the only big guy that will be there when I visit the woods is me. God, you're pathetic.

christ user. you've apparently been at this thread most of the day. your nigger dad leave you bored on father's day or what?

check out mel's hole. there's a couple things on youtube but the one you want is the radio interview the guy who found the hole did. it's really fascinating and super spoopy

australian badlands home to many spooky homeless murderers and thieves.

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first thing that came up was art bell, pretty stoked fam

it's eerily fascinating. definitely worth a second watch even. i first learned of it from the stickied list on /x/ which i believe is still there. there's enough material there to keep even the most avid spookster busy for months. spookster? idk kek

i vaguely remember this now. used to listen to him in my bunkbed as a kid. art had some stupid shit, but when he was on point there was no one better. the only sticky on our /x/ is meta thread, you mean halfchan?

yeah there's a giant list there. was just browsing it again a second ago to make sure it's still around.

Sounds pretty homosexual, tbh. Are you sure this isn't another ruse, famalam?

Psychopaths, criminals, and Australian white trash aren't very spoopy.

Now, all that that hope and energy I had for a brighter tomorrow is gone. All that remains in my cold heart is despair. How will you pay for this damage you have done to my soul? Pic related.

well if australians aren't spooky then gay homosex will definitely make your jimmies stand on end.

sorry about your dad and being black and all. have a qt3.14. hope you feel better sweetie

…
…
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en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mel's_Hole

Now explain to me why you think this isn't complete bullshit and the toothfairy is.

98% of what he talks about is bullshit
shocker, i know. brace yourself for this next one
colorful ponies, hermoine, the idea that anyone will love you, (simply; everything you jerk off to) don't real either
makes you wonder why we keep going under such false premises

not something i necessarily believe. just found it interesting. i have trouble placing belief in things when reasonable evidence is staring you in the face. but, there are similar unlikely things people believe.

never heard the part about the US base around it or the medicine man kek. just the interview with the dude saying how he measured it and the crazy shit he experienced.

could make for a decent sci-fi novel if the right person felt so inclined

god this post lacks ==NIGGER JEWS FAGMONKEY GET OUT REEEE==

I walked in the dark without a flashlight at 2 AM last night in my heavily wooded rural neighborhood all alone. There were no big guys in those woods. How does it feel to be afraid of your own shadow? If I have extreme disdain for plebs and act with the utmost arrogance, will I mysteriously disappear any faster?

Why not Aokigahara?

This happened twelve years ago so I can't recall all the details, but may interest you.
No one ever found out of it was just a really creepy child molester or a humanoid cryptid or something, but it was really fucking terrifying even though it didn't do anything. Sorry if this isn't creepy enough, and I can't really give you perfect details, but I can still see that fucker because imagine fucking waking up to a weird ass like that staring at you.

are you feeling anything?

No, not at all. It's almost like Bigfoot is a bully also and gets a massive erection knowing I'm spitting on dreams and crushing egos. I bet we'd be best bros, Bigfoot and I. I even walked outside in the dark as the rain picked up tonight. It was a perfect time for me to disappear without any big guy tracks being left behind.

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any luck finding your dad? it's crazy enough finding a nigger that isn't super impressed by magic, so miracles can happen

Obviously, you have never walked barefoot thru a deserted forest at night, only to step in a large puddle of still-warm bear semen, have you?

Thank you.

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WHAT IF SOMETHING WAS ALL WEIRD AND TWISTED AND MOVED REALLY JUMPILY LIKE IT WAS STOP MOTION AND IT HAD REALLY LONG STABBY FINGERS WITH TOO MANY JOINTS AND IT SUDDENLY GRABBED AND STARTED CHEWING THROUGH YOUR FACE SLOWLY AND LOVINGLY UNTIL YOU DIED

I often go out into the middle of nowhere at night around San Diego, 3-4am is the best time as no one's there. In terms of spooky, you'll run into quail hiking because they're fucking stupid and sleep on the trail itself, and they'll wait until you're inches from them then take off with a massive amount of noise. Good way to check if your heart is healthy. Hiking out in the Yuha desert used to be fun as there's no one for miles and there's no vegetation so you can just walk anywhere you want but it's not safe these days due to all the Mexicans and South Americans jumping the border. The beach is even completely empty at that time so you can go do things to the sea lions.

I went missing last night. I should have known better than to walk the dog at 2 A.M. Somehow I still have my cell phone, but I don't remember how I arrived in this damp, dark cave. My head aches and I hear something moving about in the distance. The sounds echo too much in here, so I can't tell if it's getting closer or not. I'd start making my way out, but the sun must be low in the sky already and there's no visible light besides my phone so it's not clear which way to go. I don't want to get lost in this cave. Help me! What do I do now????

try making a tulpa.

user, you just got raped by a skin walker. In case you aren't dead yet, your phone hasn't shat itself and you have your dog with you, try seeing if he can find a way out.

I'm less certain of this.

There were many coexistent hominids, seems like we killed, fucked or marketed them all to death aside from homo sapiens, right?

But if we didn't, then for one of them to still be around it would stand to reason that it's because they are evolutionarily specialised towards contra-sapiens stealth techniques. Like on a simultaneously cultural and survivalist basis. As persistence hunters the idea of persistent evasion shouldn't be a stretch? It's how people today stalk deer.

So if bigfeet exists, they would be an entire species of solid hairy snakes..

Just returned from smokies, op.
Sadly, no spook.
Maybe try Appalachian trail/ genuine spook in abandoned warehouse?

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dyatlov_Pass_incident
OP needs to go to russia

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Look up pizza gate, it's spooky and real.

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totally not real.

eat

Can I intentionally meet supernatural doom or a spooky death? What's the thing you are afraid of the most that only the superstitious believe in? Sleeping in a haunted house? Exploring the woods alone at night? Chasing a skinwalker? Summoning a demon? Making a deal with the devil? Cursing God?

I know you /fringe/ faggots are out there. What's the most forbidden magic you can imagine that will surely cause my destruction? It doesn't matter. Magic doesn't real, and neither does the devil or his minions. Any creator for this universe is merely an unknown entity or one we only see in an abstract, incomplete sense and all the stories told about him are just that - stories. No religious deities have any overwhelming basis in reality and at best have only managed to serve as metaphors for worldviews lost and forgotten. Do you think a god would have you live as timid, frightened things, always mindful of crossing him, the one who forced a life upon you that you didn't ask for? It doesn't matter if you do. You have no power to know if that's really the case. Revering, fearing, cursing, and ignoring these shadows in our knowledge of the world are all just as valid, but only walking in the light is truly fulfilling as the shadows vastly outnumber the lights and only serve as distractions from the joy of enlightenment.

All I know is that I exist for whatever reason and that I'm hungry, so I eat what is edible while I am here to banish the emptiness inside. If blindly following this path leads to my death, the price does not seem too expensive, as life was bestowed upon me out of nowhere and whether it ends in old age or in abrupt surprise, both are the whims of the unknowable. So as long as living is good enough, and there is no reason to imagine death will be any particular way, I'll hunt for what I am hungry for, and what I hunger for right now is to peel back one more layer of this reality. Instead of bending the bars of this prison cell with bare hands, I want to dig at the cracks in the weak spot of a wall. So go ahead. Invite me to do that thing you're afraid to try yourself. You don't have any sacred knowledge anyways.

k

Do you really want to know?

There are clusters of disappearances in and around national parks, I just thought that was spooky and it's related ot the thread, but here you are shitting your pants over bigfoot.
Since we're also making presumptuous accusations here, I'll go ahead and assume you're the kind of person who seeks any chance to ridicule anons regardless of context because you get shit on constantly IRL and since you're too much of a pussy to fire back at your tormentors you take it out on a nebulous group of internet faggots because it sets off that same little dopamine high that actually successful people feel when they do something noteworthy.

How do get skinwalker gf

We need to create another spooky big guy. He should be a spooky alien of some type that flies in an equally spooky space ship.

Somebody bumped the fucking thread again, so fiiiiiiiiiine I guesssss.
UGH

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s a g e

This. Bump for more theories on other homos.

Well, dub dubs, it has something to do with hetrosexuals mating… that is why there are homosexuals.