It's once again Halloween night, and once again the curse of the werewolf walks among us. Filled with cringe, fangirlism, and edge, I present to you the annual Holla Forums story-time of the greatest achievement mankind has ever produced…
NIGHT OF THE WERE-ED
So gather-round creeps and ghouls, grab your Halloween jaw-breakers, and may Ed's epic mullet protect you all.
NIGHT OF THE WERE-ED SOUND-TRACK:
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The Ed's are engaging in scams, as usual. However, this time is different. This time Ed has a strange bite on his hand that is hindering him. As soon as you see mighty Ed's hand wrenched in pain you know nothing will ever be the same again.
ED IS A WEREWOLF and Sarah got some tits.
It unnerves me how little Ed is into becoming a werewolf.
Shit gets dark fast with Night of the Were-Ed.
Ed awakens the next morning and tears are shed, bromance kindled. Thankfully, Plank knows all about werewolves.
Ed was apparently bitten by the werewolf the other day, in broad daylight, because that's when werewolves come out.
Gay Werewolves. Gaywolves. Weregays.
Either way, we're getting yaoi shipping.
Were-Eds are on the prowl and the anime expressions hurt my soul.
Ed and Double D aren't just werewolves. They're awesome good werewolves that fight bad werewolves because they got super willpower or something.
Anyway, Eddy stabs the king werewolf with a pie-server and the subsequent inferno releases the Ed boys from their curse.
Everything is made right, the curse is lifted, but Ed and Double D, they share a newly forged bond. A bond which may or may not, but probably is, gay.
As Ed and Double D look over the full moon, one must wonder, is this the end?
FUCK NO BECAUSE NIGHT OF THE WERE-ED PART TWO - SOLAR ECLIPSE IS COMING UP
I'm going to force myself to read it this year.
NIGHT OF THE WERE-ED PART TWO - SOLAR ECLIPSE
Did you know the author of this graduated from CalArts?
Anyway, our story starts with the Ed-boys considering the supernatural implications of the upcoming solar eclipse. Eddy brings up that it's been a whole week without an attack from the Kanker sisters and the implications are obvious.
Double D strolls in the dark alone after Ed turned down his boy-pussy and thinks about the horrifying events of NIGHT OF THE WERE-ED, which apparently happened four fucking years ago. They'd be out of high-school if that were the case.
Little does Double D know that in the darkness, following him, is a blood-thirsty pair of tits.
VAMPIRE! VAMPIRE KANKERS! COCK-SUCKING KANKER VAMPIRES!
Man, things have changed in the Cul-de-sac, and for the worse. Rolf has a soul-patch and Kevin has a pony tail.
As Marie asks what Double D is (which the correct answer is 'werewolf'), Ed and Double D do the most basic research imaginable on vampires, all of which elaborates the coming plot.
Also, vampires are "horror" not "sci-fi". Fucking get your act together, Nintendo-Nut 1.
Werewolves vs. Vampires. This is some Twilight shit going on here.
Look it's fiction and if vampireology isn't a science I've wasted years of my life, what more do you want?
Double D visits Vampire Marie and learns the Kankers were seduced with promises of immortality and perfection by some Dracula looking character.
This confirms that the Kanker's are sluts.
Double D gets Marie to….
Oh boy….
''OH BOY….
DOUBLE DRACULA D!
Double Dracula D becomes a Vampire Werewolf like that guy from Underworld and demands to be taken to the Dracula King Man.
Oh, and they carve Plank into a wooden stake.
The wooden stake to kill the vampire with.
Plank.
...
So the final battle between vampires and werewolves begins.
Double Dracula D looks like he has a ginger Abe Lincoln beard.
oh no not this evil again
please tell me there's part III
I almost forgot this was going to happen, if only i didn't get on Holla Forums today.
My lord, the metaphor.
Who the fuck is this Dracula guy? They don't give him a name. So he just came to a run down Cul-de-sac to make trailer trash vampires?
Also, what the fuck is on Jimmy's head?
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It's Jib.
Remember when Ed, Edd, and Eddy was about scamming kids for jawbreakers?
It feels so long ago.
Yeah yeah laugh it up tough guy. You know how hard it is to hunt a vampire in this day and age? Nine out of ten are some retarded tumblr bullshit about being vampires who supposed feed of your emotions but are really draining the money out of your wallet. And when you get that damned tenth bang to rights you get slapped with a lawsuit from the anti-vitalism league.
The Dracula is vanquished, but at what cost? AT WHAT COST?
They seem rather chummy with a pack of sluts who sold their immortal souls to a vampire for earthly power.
I guess the idea is supposed to be that the Dracula brainwashed them into becoming his vampiric slaves, but most likely, he just convinced them that becoming vampires would help them bone the Eds.
After the funeral for a beloved, faithful, and loyal chicken, Marie and Double D fuck in a junkyard.
No, read that again. They fuck in a junkyard. Kelsey, please, reign in your lust.
Peace has returned to the Cul-de-sac. The vile undead have been purged from the Peach Creek estates. The nightmare is over.
OH NO IT ISN'T. WE STILL HAVE NIGHT OF THE WERE-ED PART 3 - ALL HALLOW'S EVE, THE FINAL CHAPTER OF THE WERE-ED SAGA.
Dracula is quite insidious.
All we need now is this music to make that scene complete.
NIGHT OF THE WERE-ED PART 3 - ALL HALLOW'S EVE
It's been a wild ride, and it doesn't end.
The final chapter opens with the Ed boys enjoying a zombie flick before Double D goes on and on about Halloween's origins. Plot set up and let's go.
Double D is having a party at his house. Everyone is invited INCLUDING EVIL ITSELF!
No, seriously, why the fuck is all this evil shit happening to the cul-de-sac?
Sweet Jesus, Double D. Just because you be getting mad pussy you had to invite her bitchy sisters. Fucking bros before hoes, man. They might have some vampire stds and shit.
Oh, and there's a Zombie plague apparently.
Billy & Mandy crossover
Seriously?
yes
no
Boy, the apocalypse must've been real quiet and nobody noticed.
The blood moon appears in the sky, turning Ed into a were-wolf, and Double D into Double Dracula D. We're getting the whole gang back together for this one.
IT'S THE CURSE OF EVIL TIM!
Somebody stop this please. My sides can't take it.
Somebody shoves a shot-gun into Ed and Double Dracula D's face, and evil spirits are behind everything. I guess? I don't know.
I'll just leave this here before midnight hits.
We need some mood music.
OH FUCK ELMER FUDD
EDDY'S FUCKING BROTHER. Wielding a gun that'll give /k/ fits.
Look, he's super-cool, guys. He's got a goatee and smokes and everything.
fucking knew it
I still can't get over Edd's transformation.
It turns out, Eddy's Brother was only posing as a carnie because Eddy's Brother is a fucking vampire slayer.
Also, Double Dracula D fucked up by becoming a werewolfdracula and that's why there's zombies and shit.
As that rifle was thrust into Eddy's hands, the gravity of the situation suddenly weighed on him. At that moment, he wished he was scamming for jawbreakers. He wished things had gone differently. He thought this as he clutched the gun in his hands, knowing he had to learn how to kill to save his own life.
CREEPY JESTER SKELETON OF SHIPPING SHIPS. NOTHING, NOT EVEN DEATH, CAN STOP HIS SHIPPING.
Also, considering that all of her sisters have different hair colors, I doubt May ever knew her father.
nononono stop
Boy, that zombie apocalypse, I tell you what. I mean, leaves plenty of time for love, you know what I mean? I mean, you know, right?
Love. Love.
Oh thank god that's finally over.
I guess May is loving the knot
Ugh, I was wrong, terribly wrong.
Oh and any previous explanation of why this shit was happening, just throw it out the window. Just throw it so hard out there. Just chuck it. It's garbage. All garbage.
Oh, nevermind, they're gonna kill Double Dracula D afterall. Thank the lord.
The Ed boys take far too much glee in mauling their friends now that they've become zombies. It's like they've been waiting for the excuse.
If you have to buy propane this Halloween season, make sure it's Peachy Propane.
every fucking year
perfect
Do people really like this cringy shit?
...
this is sadder than video related
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Oh.
He's not dead afterall.
FUUUU
All is right with the world. The Ed boys get smooches. Eddy's brother leaves with Eddy vowing he'll become a better slayer than he ever was.
We're almost at the end guys. Almost.
that reminds me of that orange dog furry thing.
Hey guys,
IT WAS ODIN.ODIN THE NORSE GOD WAS BEHIND IT ALL.ODINTHE NORSE GODBEHIND IT ALL.FUCKING ODIN. ODININ MY ED, EDD AND EDDY.
So concludes this year's story-time of Night of the Were-Ed. I thank you all for joining me for this harrowing All Hallow's Eve experience and may the might mullet of Ed watch over you, always.
...
FUCKING ODIN.
SUDDENLY ODIN
IS SENDING YOU VISIONS
Truly the work of a god this comic was
Yes.
Every time.
How about that.
...
fat dog mendoza
I was thinking of cool cat.
Wow so this is it huh. I'm not sure what to think of this.
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You examine images before saving them, right?
Now that this is done, is someone gonna storytime Serenity for Christmas?
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You know more than anything I'm amazed at how the art improved between issues.
I will save this, place it in a zipdrive but not name it and place it somewhere safe that I don't go often, so in the far future I might just find it. And in finding it unwittingly open it, and remember all of this horror once more, for these things should not be allowed to be forgotten.
I thought I recognized the art style cancer.
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We mostly look at it just to laugh at the fact someone was autistic enough to make this.
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Finally made it through the whole thing, for once.
Wow, this was something else.