So I recently started talking to my first ex (stopped talking due to lack of communication on her end) and I'm stuck thinking about her 90% of the time. I also text her a lot (borderline cringe-tier) without as many replies as I'd like
How can I reduce these thoughts and be less clingy?
Usually I don't think of her when I'm doing shit like classwork or vidya, it's more of the "moments in between" type of thing
Bump
Make an imaginary copy of her.
But user I already do that in my mind.
I play out fake scenarios in my mind that we have. I do that with everyJuan
Date a girl you don't really like
What's the point of doing that?
I'm trying to date her so that I'm not miserable user
You can focus on her flaws, eventually you will see her in a different way or hate her.
oh, that's easy op
just have sex with lots of different women, then she won't seem so important
What if I'm pessimistic? Recognizing someJuans flaws is super easy, I don't want to hate her. I just need a way to balance being too clingy and being too distant.
...
classwork or vidya aren't hobbies, get real hobbies
Does starting a workout routine count as a hobby?
Now is kind of a bad time to start a hobby, since I'm nearing finals week.
if you will be thinking about lifting all the time and try to achieve something, then yes
I mean, I am trying to get big 4u
I like dancing too, if that counts for anything.
Bumperino
You can't
You need higher context. It's going to cripple your soul. Then guess what? No eternal life for you. Just darkness, like shutting off a light switch.
You're stuck thinking about her and being clingy because you're starved for physical and emotional connection. When she talks to you you have that connection and you're soaring on whatever reward chemicals your brain is giving you, and when she's gone you come crashing back down.
You can stop this in two ways. Build other close emotional connections, either friendships or relationships. Or improve what you have. If she's your ex and she's barely responding, you need to move on. But I'll give you some advice for when and if you do start talking to someone new.
Don't send bullshit. If someone sent you "hey, how's it going?" would you be able to start a conversation from that? Of course not. If you want to talk, have something to say, or say nothing. If someone sends you a message, don't act aloof or wait for an hour or shit like that, they'll lose interest. But don't overdo it. Let them talk, offer your own opinions. If it's superficial conversation, let it be superficial. You can't steer a conversation towards being meaningful or creating emotional connection, it can only occur organically.
Take up meditation or something. Try hypnogogic sleep. Try writing, even if everything you write is garbage. Jack off a lot. Whatever it takes to clear your head of emotional baggage. And when you do talk to people, think about whether you would be interested in what you're saying, or whether it's something that actually continues the conversation instead of just small talk.
Either that or become a faggot.
OP, it's me.
Yes I am your ex.
Of course I post here.
I don't think about you.
I feel no anguish.
You don't get a participation medal. 🏅
Get beefy and rape me.
Don't feel too bad user, I'm the opposite of you. I can't keep a girl around because I'm totally aloof.
Iunno, Try being a little more like me… why still being you?
Hold on loosely?
No meds
nofap
Have options: other girls build confidence
Find your soul calling and do it
Bump