Prison story thread

So have any of you anons been in prison before?? if yes what were you arrested for?? and why?? post your stories.

one time in prison lol

Learn to sage newfag my god.

I've been to jail a couple times. It sort of sucked, but never served time.

What were you arrested for?

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What kind of drugs user?.

To this day, I think of the bananait was truly a glorious day for the YLYL thread

was a bunch of stuff
was heroin

LOL newfags dont know how to sage.

heroin is dope.

Definitely my favorite.

This banana picyute makes me laugh. It's funny, because it looks like it's naked.

Fucking creep

Smoked some funny stuff and broke into my semi-estranged father's house because I needed a place to rest. I hung out for a few hours, took a shower, listened to music, took some beers from the fridge. Was going to wait for them to come home and apologize for cutting the screen door on the porch, but my wicked stepsister showed up, called the cops and had me arrested.

The arrest was kind of brutal, though. The cop didn't remove the handcuffs when he put me in the back, and I was completely compliant. I told him they were too tight, so what does he do? He opens the trunk and gets these heavier handcuffs to put on me, like for a gorilla or something. Then I sat in the back of the car for like an hour while they talked to my stepsister and decided what to do with me. She had the ability to have me freed, but decided to be a bitch and told them to take me. The whole time, I had to go to the bathroom so bad, I thought I was gonna die, but the cop wouldn't let me urinate. So that's two forms of extra-judicial punishment for a family matter that could have been resolved without the use of the police.

I was only in the holding cell at the jail for a few hours until I got bonded out, but that was a medieval experience in itself. It was filthy like it hadn't been cleaned in months, not fit for a dog. They let the place go to hell because it was the old jail that was still being used while the new one was being built. I was one of the last inmates who got to go to the old, shitty jail for my only arrest, lucky me. The cell had a heavy door with a little window so they couldn't hear you in the lobby. The guard covered the window with a shade because I kept asking for stuff. It was very boring and claustrophobic. They gave me some literature on the "Prison Rape Elimination Act", but the text was comically small, like a person with good vision would need a magnifying glass to read it. A few hours passed and just as I was starting to doze off, I got released.

Got it dropped down from burglary to trespassing, and then adjudication withheld with probation, so no felony. The worst part is that I probably won't be at my father's funeral, but it's bittersweet because he traded his son for his new family that never accepted me.

That was hilarious, nice blogpost.

Nice pasta.

Good, I'm glad your amusement was an unintended consequence of my prose, because I wasn't attempting to be humorous, and I'm not normally one to contribute to datamine threads.

Unless you're laughing at my misfortune, in which case, suck a dick.

I once got detained, then my dad showed up to pick me up and he was MAD.

always question everything. you may eventually find out who you are not allowed to question.

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Never done time but been in cells for 24 hours 3 times.

and refused entry from a country once.

First time

He lies says reason I drove was to see my ex gf.

Didn't get DIC but got a carless driving charge.


Time two…

number 3


Now the refused entry.

I would just like to thank LAN Chile airlines for rescheduling all my fights for free on the spot.

Also like to thank Chile immigration for not giving any fucks.

They Xray the empty bag and my shoes. Make me go to a little room and lift up my ball sack infront of two dudes.

Finally let me go… Ask if I need help repacking NOPE act mad throw everything in bag grabbing little bag of coke and rubbish first.

That coke part at the end made your other lame stories worth t.

Just story… if we just talking about run in with the law.


Now everything been stable and happy for 6 months no fighting or issues after I got some anti depressants.

We are more in love then ever.

This was kind more all the events that lead to me being stuck in Eastern europe to.

Yeah so now I am forced to be a slav and work for $3 an hour. Till one day we save enough and can immigrate back to my home country.

You can't drive? Visa issues or what?

I'm not from europe.

I can't drive over fucking ocean plus no car.

The fuck kind of country do you live in?

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Yes. I had reason to believe my (now ex-) GF was cheating. I did not exactly catch them in the act, but they were together when I confronted them. He started towards me and I said, "Are you sleeping with my GF?" He said, "Yeah, I'm fucking her, what are you gonna do about it?" What I did about it was pick up one of my golf clubs (I was in the garage, they were in the driveway) and beat him with it until I heard sirens. I was sentenced to 3 years in prison. I had never been arrested before that.

While I was out on bail before being sentenced for the assault, I was arrested again for disorderly conduct. Since being released, I have not been arrested, but have been taken in for questioning after being falsely accused of rape.

Tell us about false claim of rape.

Also prison stories?

Notice how every story is because of a women.

I'll give pass to females on this one since user is a fucking creep.

Women are fucking are destructive if I didn't have my current gf I would go MGTOW.

Also Holla Forums has a tiny user base the amount of criminals per captia is really high here.

Guards/Screws bring in some skinny beta/hipster fag into housing unit and let the boss of the tough guys / gang bangers know that he's charged with abusing a couple of pre teen black kids. The guy was some kind of teaching assistant at a school for autistic minorities or something. One of the lead gang bangers tells one of his underlings that the newfag had messed with someone in his family.

They make the hipster newfag feel all intimidated, typical nigger chants and noises and they make the newfag strip naked and force him to run around the bunk areas. As he's running around the gang bangers make people like me punch, kick, and trip him. Every time he falls, the gang bangers pummel him whiles he's on the ground. This goes on for a while until he starts crying. After about 5 minutes, he stays on the floor in the fetal position. The main gang bangers gather around and kick him until he's coughing up blood etc. After about another 5 minutes of this, the guards walk in, disperse the crowd and the bleeding newfag is carried out on a stretcher.

When I was in cells all I wanted to do was fight fat ass niggers because they told me to shut up.

When I was set out with others some random white guys covered in tats looked like he done a lot of time came over a fist bumped me and sat and talked nigger was to scared to come over and they had to talk me out of attacking him even he was bigger.

I fucking hate niggers so much I was in such a rage from cops already.

WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO WHAT NIGGERS/SPICS/WIGGERS ORDERED YOU TO.

Also tell me about the false rape.

Let me tell you a little somethin' about Reddit spacing

WTF is this reddit spacing meme shit. I never even go on reddit does it auto space your text or some shit?

You have to go back.

It is literally just some autistic divide and conquer bait, just ignore the faggots who post it tbh

Also continue with story time pls

This could be you too if you people didn't act like literal niggers

Wow a lot of reddit fags on tonight.

I have never been arrested as I am not a nigger. There was a near arrest experience because of a feminist, though.

Wow, poor fucking babby. Do you need a bandaid for your booboo? Maybe next time try not breaking the law. The point of getting arrested is that it's not fucking comfy, dipshit.

Here, have an upvote.

Not me but happened to someone I know.

This guy comitted ebay fraud a bunch of times and had to serve 2 weeks in juvie. I guess they wanted to scare him a bit. Heard he got beat up inside and was a lot quieter after he got out. Also hes abusing drugs now. Pretty fucked up.

Everybody breaks the law. Ever jaywalk? You've broken the law. Ever get a traffic ticket? You've broken the law. What I did hardly rises to the level of an offense, it's more of a civil/family matter.


Lolno. They're not supposed to prevent you from using the bathroom. That's a medical issue. If I had a witness I could've sued the police department.