Why aren't you having sex, Holla Forums?

There's nothing else, user. Just give it a little bit. Three or four minutes.

I mean literally goys. It's all in the eyes. Don't even talk to me. You are a gay animal and I want no part in it. Everything I thought I loved…

Oh lord, tell the guys at the convenience store down the street from the sorority house that we've got another one.

the animals are doing something right

The best part is that the planet herself wants to kill them off. Abominations.

Because I don't have a girlfriend.
Nor do I have the need to fuck some random twat.
Beside I'm playing pokémon.

Shouldn't you even try to have sex?

Because my robowaifu isn't finished yet

Because sex is reactionary bourgeoise nonsense.

because i repel women

Because my gf had to work 16 hours due to fucking womens day shit.

Shes to tired to put out.

I have evolved past sex

*tips fedora

If the only reason you have left to live is to jizz you may want to rethink your life choices

Jizzing into a vajayjay is literally the meaning of life

Oh i know that but literally anyone can breed its not difficult, dont you want a challenge?

For some finding a vagina to jizz into is quite the challenge in all actuality.

It IS worth it guys…

Because my grill is fucking crazy. I hate religious people.

Hating women is not cool, dude it's 2017 what the fuck man

/thread

The only thing that will make me fall in love is a nice sloppy forced throat fuck. Even that isn't worth it.

Girl I fell in love with turned out to be asexual and I didn't find out until after High School so I missed my chance to experiment and talk to girls other than her.

She cursed me to be a virgin forever with her.. but hey! Once I turn 30 I'll be a hairy wizard.

Shut the fuck up, whore.

You should come over to wizchan

Listen buddy don't try to act tough on the internet. Why don't we meet up and you say that to my face. I'm a real man, I stand up for women.

...

Literally fuck a fat chick

Fat chicks usually have pretty good options to choose from tbh

Here is the kicker.. and I care about her, so I would never say this to her face but. She is a fat chick!

Because satisfaction is not guaranteed.

Rule of acquisition number 19

because i can't have sex with an image of a 2d Japanese bestiality pedophilia harem cartoon
also i kinda don't wanna mix bodily fluids with 3d because i don't want STD from party girls, and don't know anyone else i trust for long term (no cheating) grils

I'm on a business trip and my dog is home

...

What the fuck do you want? To get your dick wet or marriage? Talking about trust and shit. Just fuck the bitch and ditch the bitch.

...

not with 3DPD

How do you meet a NEET gf?

If she loved you she'd let you fuck her, literally all she has to do is lay there. You disgust her, she doesn't love you she's just entertained by you.

This

...

I got sucked off yesterday, actually.

Face fucking turns my wife on.

Because I cannot into conversation. I'd love to fuck all the girls who approach and try to tall to me, but I can never find the words to start or maintain a conversation. Maybe I just hate it, I don't really know

can't have sex alone.
can we?

on internet. duh

Because I am in line at the DMV.

ugly bitches there, man

is sex all a woman can provide? give me a good conversation and I'll stick my rod in a wet orifice. I have yet to have one with a woman though.

Because I am literally alone in a cabin in the arctic?

Its friday night Holla Forums. What the fuck why are you alone?

Speaking of sex, does anybody know where one might find an escort? Asking for a friend.

Because I'm trying to get a job so I can secure financial stability. I don't give a shit about women, my livelihood comes first second and third.

All the women I know are fucking stupid, or taken.
Do women even leave their homes anymore unless their boyfriend drags them out? Because I never see single women anywhere. Occasionally I'll see girls out in a massive group, which you never want to approach if you're looking for somebody who's actually worth the god damn trouble because usually they're just trying to whore around.

I'd say fuck it and just pump and dump somebody but I don't trust anyone to either not give me STDs or to not go crazy and chop my dick off after I don't call her the next day.

Honestly, I don't know. On one hand I masturbate a lot, but on the other hand (no not literally) every time I've had sex I haven't been satisfied any more than pleasuring myself. What's worse is that my self indulgence has a very dark tone to it, and things such as torture make me thrilled for it, but at the same I don't wish to inflict anything of that nature on a sexual partner. It's very confusing as my fantasies are horrific but my in real life desires are loving.

I just don't get it, and I don't feel like anyone could really love me. Not because I'm a bad person, just that I don't think I can truly love another person as opposed to their concept, and as such I extend that to myself. Why would they care for me, I always find faults enough in others, so yea… I dunno.

I don't understand this, why haven't you payed for a hooker yet, I get that you might find the thought of a woman that's had sex with loads of men disgusting, but in reality most woman above the age of 30 have had a lot of dick. I can get some really attractive hookers for around 300 for an hour, end your wizard status, learn how overrated sex is and live a normal life.

just get a dog

no risk of disease, no risk of unwanted pregnancies, no need to pay for sex

nicer pussy too

Saturday night is here soon, what the fuck are you alone again???

because I like being alone

>>>/facebook/

No you don't, dumbass. Just admit it and quit bullshitting us. Your life is a fraud.

Every life circumstance is a balance of pleasure and pain.
The life state of being alone is an excellent bargain. If you can tolerate or even enjoy loneliness, you just substituted 1 simple problem for 10000 shitty problems.

because my dick is 3.5" and it's embarrassing. i will never even attempt sex.

Because I have no interest in women

Indulging in hedonism is always looking for that elusive fix that will make you feel good. The orgasm is great, but it never fixes the gaping hole in my soul before nor after fucking some random FWB cunt. I'm done with that lifestyle it brought me nothing but regret.

I would trade it all in just to be a virgin again and regain some of my self respect.

Why did you lose your respect? All it means is you're a socially functional human being. You're in full control of your situation. I would have self-respect if I was you.

The grass is always greener, isn't it?

Because your Mom's at work right now.

gf is on her period, i don't like pissing clumps of blood the next day and condoms are for homosexual buttsex only.

Hyper sexuality is disgusting.