Stuff we did as kids

post dangerous/ lulzy stuff you did as a kid. I'll start:

>He was wearing a pokemon sun visor and one of those faggy gag bacon shirts (I

continued

NEXT DAY


still running
AAAAAAAIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

Things could have gone worse I guess

I remember this one time at boy scout camp, my friends and I just got our knife safety cards. This one guy asked for my pocket knife and he tied a piece of twine to it. He smeared bug spray, tiki torch fuel and petroleum jelly on the blades and began to twirl it around like god of war. A parent caught us playing fire ninja and blew up; we almost got kicked out of the scouts for that. Good story btw

I like stories where retards get fucked up for being retards. Nice job user.

didn't even bother to explain to our parents

forgot pic

...

pretty hot, how old was cousin

around 7

also i don't have anything worth greentexting but i used to like hanging out in the woods around the town dump at dusk and me and my friends would shoot the coyotes with slingshots. that was probably sort of dangerous in hindsight.

lucky fucker

I can't help but feel really bad for them in this story. I think I would have done things differently. maybe I would have just given him the stupid pokemon card and made him think differently of me. would have been a possible potential bro for the rest of the camp…


I'm laughing so hard I can't breath

He was retarded, user. This fucker was a whiny bitch. no regrets

...

...

...

you just seem like a shitty person. they were annoying, but you took it way too far. being retarded is their own punishement enough.

What do mean "they"? It was one retard who drank my Dr. Pepper. Go back to Reddit, moralfag

probably the tard in OPs story plus himself

You were the real victim. Few things are worse than being subjected to a retard for any longer than 5 minutes; especially as a child who is forced to tolerate their defectiveness.

I picked my teacher's nose once

yeah retards are incapable of suffering. like cockroaches. they were meant to be an outlet for our cruelty so people don't have to put up with it.

Now, don't get me wrong. I hated it when I was in school and they brought the retarded kids to sit in class with us so that our slave labour class work could be interrupted by them screeching and making scary noises and then having the teachers give us detentions for "staring" at the retarded kids. they always smelled really bad and looked really weird and made crazy weird noises but I tried to put up with it and ignore it. there was no level of compatibility between us that I could feel maybe besides a spiritual one. but anyways I was very annoyed and uncomfortable.

I never really went out of my way to fuck anyone of them over though.


I can understand OP's frustration in their story and I would have been pissed too. I would have still been angry after my "dad" fixed the problem and got us some more drinks and candy, but I mean seriously. after a certain point the adults would have had to have done something. I mean, if the retarded person is that much of an asshole and they knew it, they would eventually do enough bad things to get in trouble on there own. I wouldn't really try to hurt them like you did though. somewhere in that idiots head they thing things are diffeent and dont understand what's going on as much.

that being said, I would have been really upset too, just wouldn't have done the same thing as you.

I mean, why put a retarded kid in with a group of other kids? how is that not going to cause severe issues right?

If they have their own helper that keeps them safe and prevents them freaking out or something, then great I don't care. everyone can do their own thing and have fun. but if they just let loose a retarded person with severe issues like that and no helper, that's really fucked up.

I can't help but feel bad for him.

no user, they do think and feel. it's just different than us. cruelty is unnecessary.

you know, secretly, we are all a little bit retarded. it just depends how much.

I'm more retarded than others. I have autism. I actually like being a little retarded.

Trips confirm

bump

I picked my teacher's nose once

I was beaten viciously by my step-father as a child. I don't have a meme of this, but here's a grill.

I'm sorry that he exceeded the boundaries of acceptable discipline. There is no justification for treating you that way.

thanks m8

I would have treated you far better.

I wouldn't have.

He didn't deserve being beaten. Spanked, yes when misbehaving, but not beaten. Step parents can often go overboard.

parents are shit

Go to your room.

you think you're funny?

In kindergarten, my friend and I drove down a fairly busy two lane road in his little motorized Hummer when our parents told us it was time to go home.

We were grounded for two months.

Relax.


You got off easy.

...

We did. Later on when we were teenagers, we replaced the mini Hummer with full sized off road buggy thing, and had an airsoft machine gun mount on top. Helmets, no safety goggles, no adult supervision. I ended up being shot in the corner of my eye, which is totally my fault for not wearing goggles. It was nice having a rich friend.

Now if you'd been taught a proper lesson after your toddler escapades, you may not have tried this stunt when older.

I only seem to learn things through traumatic situations, unfortunately.

That could've happened the first time. You'd never want to be bad again.

I'm actually Polish, so it was your basic apartment block complex, a street filled with post-communist blocks.
This and New Years' Day are the only two days in the year when we can legally set off fireworks/firecrackers in Poland.

This one time, my buddy Keith, on a DARE, got a tattoo "I'm a moron" right across his forehead, man. 'Course, he made two hundred bucks off that, so…you ask yourself; Who's the REAL moron?

Good thing you knew the shortcuts and also didn't get lost once outside your area.

fuck, i kind of want to do that again.

keith sounds p cool tbh fam

My buddy Keith lived in a graveyard once for a whole year. It wasn't a dare or nothin', he just got kicked out of his house. He said he NEVER saw a single ghost 'cept for this one time when a ghost stabbed him from behind and took all his money, and he might've just been a homeless guy, 'cause he had a robe on with two eyes cut out his face.

wow you people are crazy

...

oh.. my…. gosh…. why?????????????

like father like son

this has to be a joke right?

I hope not, I just had a great fap

...

...

most likely
how come they never got caught if the mom called the police immediately?

...

Shut up you're ruining it for me!

She said she was going to call them. No one can verify if she did. Was probably a way of covering her own ass in the event she was questioned. Women are often in on it.

gay

...

He already clarified that BF was best friend.

...

...

That would have killed him. Fake/10.

This is the best greentext I've read in years. Assuming this isn't some niche copy pasta, thank you dearly, user.

pedo-fiction.

Keep telling yourself that.

to do.
back up in a hurry, that was the plan.
the Air Emergancy Services before he bleeded out his life.

I flatly refuse to actively participate in this thread in any way whatesoever.

why

We knew every hiding place in the entire town, having groups of 2 also helped.

What the fuck

You shouldn't be allowed to reproduce. Kill yourself.

...

...

I would've slapped you in the fucking face

...

fucking kek
mouthful of dry crispy old rotten semen

...

fuckin noice.

Should've fucked him.

no homo
plus he was ugly

I bet he's not happy with his GF, you should go for it.

well done OP, I can relate to you. I would've done the same.

...

kek

Bum

...

How about people?

That's a really fascinating thing to think about. It's so fun to think back to when you were a kid and had that sense of adventure, that willingness to dream, and the desire to go look for it.

Oh, yeah, that thing with the girl is pretty hot, too.

that's some old pasta.

I looked up Child porn all the time when I was little because I wanted to get off to girls my age. I'm surprised my parents never got an FBI visit or anything.

Who do you think made it up?

I did that too. Now i fap to milfs and the like.

Are you taking credit for it? I wouldn't disbelieve it, but you must have posted it before, some time ago.

I was fucking deranged child.

Now I'm /clang/. I seriously wonder how my parents never had any law enforcement come to our house or no one ever found out about me looking it up as a kid.

mfw i did this too.

I originally posted it on halfchan, but I post it here every now and then when I want to get a story thread going. Thought I'd post it here as well.

It's a true story, too, but I don't really care if you believe me or not. I can't really prove it

I set my arm on fire with gasoline

I… I just….

WHY

I did stupid shit when I was a kid but what were you trying to accomplish? Were you trying to be like Warren Peace from Sky High or something? (Which I just now realized was a play on words for War and Peace)

I believe you and enjoy it whether it's true or not. I feel that I've seen longer versions of it than itt though.

Interesting. I guess it's possible others have told it differently, but I've kept mine just about that length whenever I post it.

I don't mind if other people use my story so long as they tell it right.

My sides.

user, what the fuck.

Autism is not retardation. Retard.

wat