Happy New Year!

one of the cutest/sexiest things ive ever seen

...

Yeah… feels bad.

All the Epyc Wynn posts were removed from the Holla Forums board there is nothing to be happy about in this world.

Still, could be worse.

I am banned on KnowYourMeme for criticizing their moderators and making annoying jokes.

I envy those who are alone
normies are loud as fuck, blasting their music in the living room "celebrating". New year is retarded, just like celebrating on sunday that there will be a new monday when all the shit starts again.

Jesus H Christ, you actually have an account on KYM? Newfag redditors need to get the fuck out of here.

anyways, this new year started well

ate at burger king this afternoon
played pokemon firered for a few hours
went sleeping for a few hours
wake up and start comp
fap until midnight
ate chicken nuggets and meatballs shortly after midnight
ate a delicious cake
drank a bottle of soda
it was a good day

are you a fat?

This may be teh wrong place to ask, but does bottles of cum guy still post every new year ? Still on 4chan or did he migrate/stop saving cum?

*had

Everything has fallen into place exactly the way I'd want it to. It's like a dream come true, really.

But I'm too much of a faggot to capitalize on this.

Here, OP. have some shitty music

...

you are on cripplechan
what did you expect

Another year gone. Another year of being a kissless virgin

I just want sex already

I would figure most imageboard users to be the skinny/nerdy type.

Maybe 10 years ago
A grand majority of the world population is obese if they live in good countries

I'd go as easily to say 70% of Holla Forums users are overweight

4chan users are more in shape than us and that is only because they are normies that actually go out and socialize and have sex

I personally am more the type to spend all day shitposting and only eat when my parents make me come out to eat dinner.

I guess it also helps that I am the source of all the grunt work around the house. I'm the only one not on prescription pain meds, including my fucking dog, my brother had a brain tumor a few years back and is half crippled and my parents are getting old and have back/hip problems.

sauce plz?

+1

...

I didn't see another thread for new years resolutions but I feel like if I write it down I'll be more likely to follow through. Tomorrow I'm going to start working on my story every day and on Monday I'm going to start looking for a job in earnest.

Good luck user, I believe in you.

This year I'm going to try and write more, drink less and finally reel in a 3D QT.

I am pretty much in the same boat. My greatest dream right now, is to move into a 300 square foot apartment, and completely cut off all ties to my family forever, but even with years of working hard everyday at full time jobs that offer no vacation days, and avoiding the expenses that would come with having a girlfriend (implying I could find one even if I was rich), there is absolutey no way that I can do that. My life at home is a constant cacophony of yelling and screaming that never ends. I am simply not allowed to relax, I live in a state of constant subersvience and am expected to be on call 24 hours a day, all for the care and feeding of people who can provide no further use to society. It's just as stressful as raising children, except they are 60+ years old, dumber and weaker than most children, and there is no possibility of a bright future for them. It is the polar opposite of what I want to do with my life, but unless I can find a good job, my only escape will be death.

I personally am seeking a job that requires travel.
They'll pay for my apartment/hotel room and all I gotta do is live in it when im not fixing machines. My degree qualifies me for a lot of jobs and i actually know one guy who graduated with the same degree as me and was in south korea fixing machines last i heard from him. he could be in some other part of the world now for all i know though.

That sounds like a nice life. it's much better than living here at least.

When you say "machines" do you mean computers?

And

Is that ideal? Korea?
For the easy to access prostitute children or do you just have a fetish for Asian girls?

Automated systems. PLC controlled manufacturing systems to be more specific.

No, but being shipped around the world to see new places certainly does. The way these things generally work is they ship you where you are needed until you have fufilled your purpose and then they either ship you back or they find somewhere else to put you.

It's too hard to get noticed on Reddit.

I was having a nice New Years Eve alone until my friend Megs called me (Megs=Begs). I was playing Lament of Innocence, just starting to immersed into the story when she called. Uber apparently increased the rates for tonight. So I drove out into the city, just pure madness, to save my bestie/dumb slut. She actually invited me to this retard party. I don't know why she always does. She knows I hate alcohol, crowds, and drama.

I had to kick one drunk out of my car. A group of tipsy morons thought it would be hilarious to dance in front of my car while the light was green, a homicidal rage filled me. I could of got away with it too.

The entire ride home I had to listen to her slur/repeat stupidly how happy she was about the Christmas present I bought her. Some stupid fedora that lights up all sorts of colors. It was so ridiculous, I knew she love it. I had to drop her off, and random people I never met before. They seemed nice for drunkards.

I'm gonna keep playing vidya. Hope you guys have a wonderful New Years Day.

my family came over for new years but I spent most of the time on my room, I got to rub my aunt's tits though

...

I'm not going to pretend I'm a "nice guy"
I'm a virgin and almost 30. I would have waited until she was passed out and had my way with her. Make 2017 really worthwhile

why user?
why?

I hope you get sodomized by gay dudebros

it wasn't as exiting as I made it sound
her panties were black

I don't see what's so bad about being alone on new years. Or hell, even being with your other virgin loser friends.

After all, fireworks were exploding all around me while I have my girlfriend her "new years kiss" and all I could think about was how much I wished I was at home drinking and playing vidya.

Fuck no, the grass isn't greener, especially if your relationship is falling apart because your girlfriends shitty dad died and somehow she worships that pile of crap as a saint.

This girl was pregnant once.
Just look at those fucking areolas.

If she had passed out on your bed like that

Would you have felt her up again? Her breasts I mean

Did they feel "THAT" good? To justify possibly getting caught fondling your own Aunt by your whole family

How big would you say her nipples were? Were they erect?

I wouldn't have done anything to her boobs if she passed down, they felt like baby fat but more firm and she's an A cup so not much to feel there, her nipples were erect and kind of small but very firm
I would have put my hand in her panties to feel her puss since from the outline of her panties she isn't the beefy type

meant passed out

Fucking sexy. I bet she's a good girl

You got a incest fetish like me or is your Aunt just so hot that you would make an exception?

she isn't sexy to others since she is about 20 and still a tomboy with no tits and no ass(by today's standards), it doesn't help that she is 2-3 years older than me thus me seeing her as an equal rather than older than me
I don't have an incest fetish anymore but when we were living together with my grandma when I was around 8 I would crawl next to her(everyone slept in the same room) and subtly pull her pants/skirt/whatever she was wearing and sort of stand above her in a push up position and doing push ups to where my dick would poke her ass or cunt, never took it farther than that but after doing it about 4 times she woke up in the middle of the night, turned the light on and saw me pretending to be asleep near her feet(I was supposed to be in another bed) she took a belt and whipped me once on the legs, i pretended to wake up like nothing happened and moved to my bed, she turned the light off and went to sleep. it was the last time I did that, we moved out a few months after and fast forward to present she is more touchy with me out of her brothers and mine, oftentimes hugging me for long periods of time or linking arms when out in public but her being a tomboy confuses me between her acting tomboyish and subtly flirting with me

LOL @ that kid story
I bet you got whipped good. Girls always kinda know shit like that when it happens. They got ESP or some shit

I remember when I was like…17 I think. My cousins were having a party. My female cousin was 14 at the time. It was a huge party. Everybody was drunk or high and everyone was asleep (not me. i dont drink or smoke)

I stayed up and waited till everyone was asleep. I knew she sleeps without underwear so I waited then crept into her bedroom and made sure everyone was asleep and I made no noise. I borrowed her underwear and masturbated while smelling her feet. I came inside them then put her underwear back in her bag and left and went outside and just listened to music for a few hours by myself while everyone was crashed out

She woke up a few hours later and punched me in the fucking face in front of everyone and was PISSED

I still have no clue how she figured out it was me. There were like tons of guys at the party. It could have been any one of us

Cherish that my friend. One day she won't be "touchy" and you will miss it. If I were you I'd honestly (depending on how strong you are and if you are taller than her) start picking her up when you two hug and giving her a "peck" on the cheek from now on when you see her

It's not sexual. Just a bit flirty. She may like it

I was doing really well a few months ago. Had some confidence, going out and doing stuff. Met a (way out of my league) girl who was super into me. Went on some dates which I thought were going well, texting/SCing all the time. Then she just lost interest for whatever reason. Now I'm deep in the friendzone and all my self confidence has evaporated. She even (drunkenly to be fair) joked about how I was really short (I'm 5'8 barefoot). So yeah trying to come to terms with the fact that I'm short, ugly, and am right back in the pit of anxiety and depression. Wish killing myself was easier.

perhaps she wasn't asleep kek

I know one day it will stop, but I kind of want that, whenever she is with me she seems happy and it just makes me feel really guilty about what I did to her, she isn't the only one I molested when I was a kid, before her was a girl one year younger than me and once I moved it was my cousin also one year younger than me, I think me being so sexually active during my early development has a lot to do with why I feel so awkward and out of place near women not to add I don't even jerk off to 3D girls anymore my hentai collection is in the Terabytes probably out of subconscious guilt

Least you are taller than me. Cheer up Holla Forumsro
I've never even been on a date in my whole life

If you truly are in the "friendzone" maybe you could ask her if she has a single friend that might be interested in you? Worth a shot

Nah she was 110% DEFINITELY asleep. She snores really loud and farts in her sleep. I knew she was knocked out

Plus……say if she wasn't asleep
She watched me jerk off for like 2-5 minutes smelling her feet and didn't say anything? And even saw me take her underwear? Nobody does that

cheer up man, I'm 5'5 so you're taller than me
don't know what to tell you about her but I think it would be best to stop talking to her or else you will sink deeper into despair I've been there done that so I'm talking from experience
find a hobby and focus on that, once you're good at whatever you're doing join a community and you won't feel inferior to others thus giving you a foothold on interacting with others and hopefully getting into a relationship
or do like us and die a bitter virgin

did you at least see her pussy since you said she sleeps nopan?

No. She doesn't sleep bottomless LOL
Only without underwear

She has "night pants" she wears to sleep. I know she sleeps without a bra also and she prefers to sleep topless if she is alone. But she says she needs some kind of bottoms or she feels weird. She has these light, pretty thin, loose pajama bottoms she wears to bed

I've spent the night with her plenty of times. She will go to the bathroom (or ask me to look the other way) and take off her bra, take off her underwear, put on her pajama bottoms and put in a really big loose shirt. If she is sleeping alone she sleeps completely topless but locks her door so no accidents happen

Honestly, that would have made me expand to high heavens.

Your mother must have had you pretty fucking young.

When I was younger, I had stolen my 30 year old cousins panties and came inside them, than I put them back in her clean clothes hamper. I used to watch her breastfeed too, just to get a glimpse at her nips.
I don't think she ever found out, her own son was as old as I was and way more fucked up than I was.

My condolences on the height thing. I didn't even realise it was such a big deal for some women until now. I've met most of her friends and they're either taken or *completely* undesirable.

Yeah I was pretty keen on rock climbing and some other random sports but recently broke my toe so out of action for a while unfortunately. Honestly I've looked at events in my city on that meetup.com site and it seems like every single hobby sorta thing is 80% or 90% male all trying to pick up girls. All the females just do these women exclusive clubs haha.

Oh well a bitter and lonely death doesn't sound too bad.

You know, I'm 6'1, got nice hair, good facial structure and I'm a thin average guy. Blue eyes too, the kind of girl I can go for is pretty good. But my girlfriend right now is a chubby hispanic girl that is about 5 feet tall. The strangest things happen in this world.

my mom was like 17 when she had me but my grandma kept giving birth until her early 40's
I have an uncle that's almost a year younger than me, his respect as an uncle is negated by me being older and we used to be total bros until I moved out, we don't talk anymore though

yeah, most communities are full of thirsty men, the male ratio is even bigger on hobbies seen as chick magnets like car ricing and motorcycle racing(my current and so far most enjoyable hobby) but the good thing is that most girls go to those communities looking for a mate with high skill in that area, not that i've scored since my current motorcycle is just 600cc compared to the top guys with 1000cc< $20K+ sports motorcycles

LOL
she raised you as a single mom didnt she? LOL
sounds like a whore

Yeah well I guess personality goes a way. I need to somehow break out of this feedback loop where my self-confidence just keeps dropping because of all this other appearance shit.

not really, our parents were together until I was about 3 at which point it was actually my mom who dumped us and moved to another state
I like to blame my lack of a female figure led me to being a child child molester but it might just be me pointing fingers

Oh cool, that sounds like a pretty fun hobby. Do you guys meet up and race laps around closed race courses? I have a friend who's into that sort of stuff but it seems like he barely gets any racing time cause of track limits and fees etc.

Shit man. I knew families like that, sometimes it can be really cool. Age disparities with large families are pretty interesting. I'm the oldest in my family but there are 10 kids in my immediate family. If I had a kid in 2 years at 24, than my youngest brother would only be 3 years older than him.

Honestly, you may not captivate a girl that is like my girlfriend in the same way that I do. But with personality alone you can get a girl that is just as good as mine.
I used to think I looked like shit and I used to think girls would never like a "creepy" guy like me, but there are diamonds in the rough out there. Plenty of good girls that might not look like everything you wanted, but they'll love you and cherish you.

we scatter to random highways in small groups and dash to a point selected by throwing a dart to the US map, whichever group gets there last has to fill everyone's gas tank, last month we traveled a bit less than 700 miles on interstate 35 from Texas to Missouri and we went to this high class seafood restaurant
beware that when a new woman joins in there is a period of turbulence where it is male against male in a show of dominance, usually results in squids(new riders who show off) going to the hospital

gtfo kike shill
If you even are a dumb enough cuck to settle for dirty jungle pussy you deserve whatever exotic disease you contract that eventually rots your shriveled cock off.

She's hispanic and I'm hispanic you dumb nigger.

if you are considering getting a child I suggest you close the age gap ASAP since from experience having someone slightly older than you with twice the authority figure results in bad disputes unless your family sets the 'pecking order' purely on age

Haha that sounds really fun actually. Not sure if there's similar things where I live but I'll have to have a look.

just ask, the bikers I know ride because it's fun so we enjoy these types of events. don't know about the city since I heard it's easier to commute on a motorcycle or moped in heavy traffic areas

That's why we have a system like this, and since I'm the boring sober one, I always get the short stick. I don't mind though. She's always helping me, its the least I could do.

Idk never cared for the taste.
It hurts my stomach and gives me headaches. I'm a lightweight. I like cooking with it though. Made some beastly beer burgers for my bro on his B-day.