Hey Holla Forums. It's my first time Cooking Pasta. So I need some advice. First of all...

it expands roughly 2 times in volume so just use that as a guide. use as much water as possible really. i like to make sure there's at least twice the volume of water as cooked pasta. add some salt to the water.
test it as cooking. you want some firmness, al-dente, don't cook it till mush.
when draining reserve some of the water and put it back in the pan and coat the pasta with it. the pasta is very hot so the water steams off and makes it dry and sticky.
At this point mix it up with a little olive oil which will stop it sticking at all and stop it drying out.

Add olive oil after straining so it doesn't stick.

Did you spill it?

Thanks user. Wish I could share some with you

That surprised me.
I think I used too much, but good thing I did.

Will do next time. Although I don't have olive oil. I read on the internet that oil makes it hard for sauce to stick, which makes sense. Originally, I wanted to add some pesto sauce, but I ran out of it.

Nah, user.

More water isn't really bad, it just means it'll take longer to boil.

Not sure why this was so conceptually hard for you, but whatever.

If you want to learn better, I'd suggest getting angel hair as it's thin, long, and easy to make/ eat.

Boil a medium pot of water, add the pasta, wait 8 to 10 minutes, with it in the post-boiling water on a mid flame. Take one noodle out to see if it's the right texture/ consistency for your taste, and let it boil longer if you don't think it's ready.

Drain that fucker.

Then work on your toppings, lather it in a small coating of olive oil, mix that in, then take a smaller pot and make some sort of a sauce or whatever for it, perhaps get a tomato sauce and put it in there, add some garlic powder, oregano, chop up an onion into it, and grate some cheese. Mix that all up nice, heat it up, and lather it on the pasta.

How does that sound?

OP here. I'm going to make meat to go with the leftovers of yesterday. How do I go about it?
I'm thinking about frying it and add soy sauce or something of the sort?

go for it. hide your dick in the picture you take. like find waldo.

Well, I just did what I said and although i didn't taste bad it was way too hard to chew. I don't know how to make it softer, though.

Maybe next time, user.

Butter does the trick too, if you don't have olive oil.. Same thing with preparing food in the pan. No olive oil? Use butter.

Looks meh. Hopefully next I'll play find user's dick while laugh at your horribly cooked food. Happy new year.

Awww.. thanks. Wanting to watch me literally spill my spaghetti. lelel

Did you put ketchup on your meat? Try Yum Yum sauce next time. It goes great with fried meats.

This is what I am eating tonight. Leftover cod! Looks meh now. I wish I took pictures when I first pulled it out of the over. It's seasoned with parsley, dill, sesame seeds, various salts and crushed almonds. Fish is the perfect dish.

i can dox you now

Don't know why you would. I'm pretty boring. If you send me Pizza. Put pineapple on it. I like pineapple.

pineapple? bad taste. how about cheese?

Cheese is cool… Are you really sending me one!? Seriously please don't. I'm trying to get abs. Save your monies for better things, user.

Boil cold water, add the pasta in the pot, add salt and oil. Stir as you put the pasta in and simmer on second highest or one lower heat setting. Stir the pasta once in a while. Put the lid on the pot but don't cover it completely, otherwise it will boil over. If it does boil over, wipe the hot stove with a wet dishrag so your fire alarm won't activate, but watch your fingers don't get burned. You'll know it's done when the pasta starts swelling slightly and it looks more whitish than pale yellow, and when the pasta slightly rises above the water. Drain the water from the pot. If you have one of those fancy pots that come with lids with holes in them, tip it over the sink with your hands holding the lid in place, but use ovenmits. If you don't, put it through a strainer and rinse it slightly with cold water. You have now succeeded in cooking pasta.

If there are leftovers, throw them on a pan with butter/oil and cook till slightly brown. I haven't cooked much either, but you'll get it down in enough tries. And usually when in doubt, you can cook anything on pans. I once was so hungry I tossed an entire pre-made lasagna on the pan, although I had to mulch it up a bit. Ended up tasting better and crispier than in the oven.

Old bread? Slice it into cubes, season it with whatever you have lying around, into the pan. Add cheese and whatever else you have lying around. Make use of any old food you have lying around, but don't eat rotten meat or vegetables. And also, as a bonus tip, when you cook meat, you need to cook it on low-medium settings so the meat is thoroughly cooked, you don't want to eat raw chicken and get salmonella.

Honestly I'm a little surprised no one recommended you cook your own dick and eat it. Times truly have changed when you find Holla Forums giving you calm advice.

I'm not sending you anything. You just got pranked. How does it feel? How does it feel to get pranked? Tell me.

SADDAM LOVES PASTA

Hey Holla Forums. It's my first time Lynching Niggers. So I need some advice. First of all, I don't even know the amount of niggers I should add to the tree. Please, help, this is my first lynching as an adult, and I don't want to fuck it up. I'll let the nigger boil quite a lot. Also, any way to add spics and kikes to the tree to make it better?

Such feel. How can one simple user describe it. It feels Christmas on Sunday morning.

Hey Holla Forums. It's my first time gassing jews. So I need some advice. First of all, I don't even know the amount of jews I should add to the gas. Please, help, this is my first holocaust as an adult, and I don't want to fuck it up. I'll let the gas boil quite a lot. Also, any way to add gypsies to the jews to make it better?

Hey Holla Forums. It's my first time gassing kurds. So I need some advice. First of all, I don't even know the amount of kurds I should add to the sarin gas. Please, help, this is my first genocide as an adult, and I don't want to fuck it up. I'll let the sarin gas boil quite a lot. Also, any way to add shites to the kurds to make it better?

dont eat fish, pic related

It's OP again. I did something everyone here knows how to do, and I do it whenever I'm hungry, for breakfast, though. It's called Arepa. It's corn flour amazon.com/P-N-Harina-Blanca-Pre-cooked/dp/B004TDAPYU fried. You can also do something called bollito with it. This shit is pretty handy, reallt tasty, and you can add anything on it, really.
No meal today, an uncle was nice enough to make me dinner.

That sounds better than what I did. I used tin foil and an oven.
Anons are probably lonely, apathetic or absent considering the date.

Good taste.

What is that, user?
Also, I added a sauce known as 79, which is pretty strong flavored. I don't like ketchup, is pretty weak.

nigga just add pasta to salted water

Woah! Not so fast, man! I'm gonna have to write this shit down… Can you go through that again, from the beginning?

wanna be friends?

If you don't pasta like this, you don't pasta at all

More of my pasta creations on the way

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Yes.

I've never had this before?? Looks good. I'm gonna try cooking it.

It's glorious. I love it. I eat it almost everyday.

going through this thread, but as a poor mothafucka who is going to the store in a bit and is trying to gain some weight. I'm skinny as fuck. like unhealthy level skinny. can't drink milk and can't eat peanut butter. also have a hard time eating a shit ton of stuff at once and hate cooking. any tips on adding some weight for cheap and eating somewhat decent meals without drinking a bunch of soda and fast food and shit? too plain and I probably won't stick with it.

Learn to cook chicken breast faggot. Buy premade sauces too if you're starting out

OH SHIT I FORGOT TO TELL YOU TO ADD SALT TO THE WATER
DON'T EAT THAT PASTA user

Not even once.

Cool. give me your skype.