Where does the time fly

Japan, the land stuck in 1989, just got back finally in May after 2 years, having a story time, share or listen.

AMA also i guess

That music, like a chime from a siren pursuing me to follow it into a shallow grave, a warm, small, yet very excitable smile looms over the face of a 25 year old with a gas mask side bag, and a beat up skateboard begin departing from the plane, it's nine at night, the stewardess bows in arrival into the land of the rising sun. This is my first trip to Japan, obviously a vectoring… optimism comes over me, this passion for a place longing to see for over a decade, it's like a dream come true, what wouldn't come into realization till that final step back onto JAL18 was the trip that was laid before me, with no plans laid out in front of me, a couple of phone numbers, and no cell service it was looking like it was going to be a pretty subtle vacation.
For being a bleached blonde weeabo looking Canadian with a tendency to not pay attention, I look down at my claim form.. It's in Japanese, this seems like a good start to an already long day. I ask the attendant for a English form. “ Gomen nasai, wakarimasen” she states, she doesn't speak English, so I make my way to the counter to find a new slip, I lose my spot in line as a result of my own blatant lack of concentration, I continue to follow the lines, behind a large black women presumably from the southern United States, to the gloomy, tired businessman who conceptually had a few too many beers still lingering on his breath, and maybe a bit of spittle made it onto his cheep looking gray suit.
A few moments pass staring at the white walls, in a room filed with white slips, and what look like outdated computers from the early 2000's. I make it through the passport scans, and what feels like a police profiling scenario, fingerprinting, photo, and all. Got to give it to them, at least they were thorough.

I collect myself with my 60lb canvas backpack, and passport in hand, I come down the escalators into the customs baggage check, the officer inexplicably looks at my sweater, chuckling at the baby blue colors, and the “Love Potion” hirigana written on the front, he eyeballs me, I struggle to take my bag off and slam it onto the counter, he looks over my claim card, giving a 360 view of the outside of my bag, and gives me my papers back. He nods…. “what the fuck does he want?…” I think to myself, I wait, while after 15 seconds he exclaims this awkward Mr. Ed smile. Maybe I'm getting arrested? Maybe something is wrong with my bag and he wants to send in some more officers? My young boundless paranoia swirls in my head like a violent tornado. I have only 2 fears in life, blacked out and waking up in a coffin, and getting arrested even if innocent, this was not helping my case so much.. I stutter a little while pushing out some forced white man sounding Japanese “daijyobou?” he gasps and nods again, being to polite to just tell me that he didn't need to check my bag this string bean decided to have my sit there till I left on my own. Cont?

So finally I'm clear, clear to be ambitious, and wild and free, to smell the roses and meet new people, to live up the dream of visiting temples and seeing the countryside, but only to first need some cell service or some sort of communication. I look around, plenty of pictures of cell phones in looks like moon runes to me I fill myself with vigor and walk up to the first kiosk, after she explains that it is a phone rental company I stop the conversation overtly and move on, working my way down, the kiosks either rent phones, rent SIM cards, which conveniently do not work on my particular brand of phone, or want a huge deposit on credit.
I feel a bit worked up, and dismayed at this point, I find myself a seat in the main airport lobby, and look around for one of those amazing Japanese Vending machines, instead sighting a weird box kiosk machine flashing lights and saying what i can only imagine is “SIM CARD HERE ASSHAT” as it was covered in pictured of SIM cards, and date plan info. Sure as shit this was the one, the at a price of only ¥ 1,500 how the hell could it be that bad even if it didn't work, inside the packet came a small booklet, a SIM card with instructions, and some tiny packs of rice paper wipes for your forehead. I fumble with it hoping to almost break my phone from anticipation… It works.. out of all the companies, and services, this shitty little card works on my damn phone, no minutes but unlimited data, which Hell, was more than good enough.

Sounnds like quite the harrowing expirence, its a good read though very comfy one to go through late at night.

After a while I manage to find myself at the train ticket terminal.. “more moon”, I mutter to myself, dumbfounded by the wiggles and waggles of text, taking a moment to think things over, I see what I roughly translate as Yokohama, with a pretty sweet price of ¥ 1,850, the ticket pushed out like a pez dispenser, I slump my feet across the ground like a sloth till I arrive at the train platform, plenty of dead faces, and people on their phones, I see train after train pass me by, all the while in my head remembering I had made plans to visit a decade old friend who we never met, it kept me going during the long day of waiting, I remember she was always a very interesting, and lively person, and should have made an interesting first meeting.

I can buy that beer at the local liquor store for 1.50 you lying fuck.

How is a picture of my weekend make me a lying fuck, I was looking at this photo and reminiscing about my time there

Finally a voice comes over the intercom, blurry sounds of Nip tongue rush through the speakers, when a ear shot of “Yokohama” passes in her speech. A large red and black train roll up and opens it's doors. Not a single soul on this damn platform moves a muscle as I look around. Is this my train after all? The sign of Yokohama Express shows on the LED display on the train, as I hop on with blithe and rejoicing in the fact I can relax for a while. This train is like nothing I have seen in videos of Japan… It's roomy, and only has 5 people out of 100 seats in my car.. Maybe people just weren't going to Yokohama tonight and today was my lucky day. They even have a conveniently placed luggage holder for me. I sit down, getting a few up and down eyes from what looks like middle to upper class folks. I mind my own and stare out the window, as the train rips through the countryside, passing by the “ probably “ rice patties as they were flooded fields, making me think of one of my favorite used quotes “ welcome to the rice fields bitch” I snap a couple seconds of video before taking a small rest in my eyes.

“Sumimasen..”

“Excruse me” a very roughly put English accent wakes me up.

“yea..?” I stammer as I rub the sand from my peepers.

“Coourd I shee your ticket prease”. He isn't even trying to enunciate.

Cont?

No, he writes like a fucking tool!

vectoring… optimism

What the fuck is vectoring optimism?

subtle vacation

Huh?

conceptually had a few too many beers still lingering on his breath

So it was just the idea of beers on his breath?

inexplicably looks at my sweater, chuckling at the baby blue colors, and the “Love Potion” hirigana written on the front

Inexplicably looks….. Let me explain why even though it's totally inexplicable.

Stop using $10 words when you can't form a proper sentence.