The worst films you saw

She spends all her time with him and has a kid with him, I'd say that qualifies.

Yeah that's kind of her gimmick.

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I liked Greenberg. What are your thoughts on other Baumbach movies?

Worst film I saw (last year?) was Mean Girls. Holy shit that was embarrassing (for me).

I also watched Not fade away by David Chase. It was made in 2012 and has Gandolfini in it. Utterly terrible and boring in every way possible.

Another teen girl in high school movie that sucked bad was Easy A starring Emma Stone. I saw that one a few days ago.

Maybe the worst movie I ever saw was called Chef and starred Jon Favreau. If you want an middle aged man doing absolutely nothing interesting for an entire movie this is it. It also has a child actor in it. It's a film that would be well suited to 8 year olds except it's rated R because they say fuck constantly. Cameos by Iron Man and Black Widow are billed as actual roles.

all except the time she spends fucking black guys, that is

Evidence? Of course not. Also south african girls are the least likely coalburners since they grow up around real deal bug eyed literally spearchucking malaria infested niggers.

Oh, just fuck off

Suicide Squad.

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I think you like her too or you would have just said "she's a shit actress" instead of accusing her of coalburning. What's not to like.

That's not Tom Selleck?
HOW DID I MISS THAT

It ripped my soul out…

This poster looks better than the original.

jesus christ niggers are disgusting. imagine hanging that in your room as a kid

Louis I'm getting tired of telling you to get out of here.

But Finn is unironically the best character in that movie. For the majority of it he just wants to fuck off away from the empire and the crazy bitch.

Once again it takes a strong white woman to save the black man from the evil mechanization of the white patriarchy. Intersectional feminism the movie.

Except Charlize Theron who burns coal in 80% of the movies she's in.

Don't know about that but positive she doesn't fug blacks IRL.

THE ONLY GOOD INTERPRETATION OF THE FORCE AWAKENS IS A BLACK MAN RUNNING FROM A KNIGHT WIELDING A BURNING CROSS

she's raising her own bull

I was so fucking angry after watching this. I never get angry at movies, but this was too much. It somehow managed to be worse than RoboCop 3. Has there ever been an instance where a reboot actually worked to a film's favor?

So if instead she had a german shepherd as a pet she'd be a dogfucker?

Not exactly a reboot but: Tron was okay.

The answer to that question should be self evident.

I'm not sure though I can think of some remakes that are better than the original.

The 80's when they started remaking shitty 50s b-movies

John Carpenter's the Thing

Thats a remake though not a reboot.

This is, without a doubt, the worst movie ever made. I dare any of you to prove me otherwise.

It's the same shit. How is that Robocop movie not a remake?

I thought a remake was just redoing an older film with a new spin while a reboot was redoing a movie for a franchise to make the reboot canon or something.

Yes it was a rhetorical question, imbecile.

It was a rhetorical answer, cretin.

Yes, it's highly probable.

The Fly. But it's from another age.

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Yeah no.

Blatant ripoff of Short Circuit.

This. There's even an indian guy driving around in a van full of spare robot parts.

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Come on! That's 100% pure Tor Johnson kino!

The Hulk reboot was good.

John Carpenter's isn't a remake, as it differs in the plot of the original film. It's also closer to the original book than the first film.

A reboot is when you bring it back from the dead to make more money off it.
A remake is when you redo the film as closely to the original, while making it look nicer.

It's definitely a reboot if they announce 3 films before the first is even written. But a reboot can also include a film brought back 20-30 years later to a newer audience.

I actually enjoyed the RoboCop reboot. Why do people hate it? All I can see if the slightly shitty acting of Alex Murphy. It seemed to better portray his human-side than the original film.

monster a go-go. literally a feature length film that is 90% B footage.

because it was "movie that didnt need to be remade," #10,000.

avatar: the last shitbender

any transformer film

any GI joe film

I haven't seen it but I heard it doesn't do the political commentary well. Is that true?

It's pg13 schlock directed by len wiseman, a hack second only to uwe boll. Nothing about it is good as the original nor does it even try to be. Grow some taste you plebs.

Thumbsucker was a fucking pile of shit.

zoolander 2

Transformers 3

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Well there you fucking go

I love this idea to death, but the characters in the movie make me want to slit my wrists

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Anything by Zack Snyder, but pic related especially.

b-but muh memes

It was a solid action movie with almost no fat. Wasted dubs.

I cant believe im saying this but is fucking cracked actually right about this? the more I hear about the spartans the more I realize they were kind of fucking retarded, also Frank Miller is kind of a faggot

I need some input, im conflicted, almost as conflicted as a "straight" guy with a 300 poster on his wall tbh

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not clicking that shit nigga

I understand, I fucking hate myself deep down inside for going there occasionally, its so bad, for me it represents..well its hard to explain

anyhow the jist of the argument is that the persians were more representative of western civilization than the spartans at the time, who were pretty much the most backward people in all of greece

the argument he makes is convincing because it isnt some emotional reaction, he points out the persian empire at the time basically meant a significant improvement in standard of living both in terms of infrastructure safety and more soft areas like poplitical representation etc, they were far more advanced than the spartans in just about all things and their citizens were relatively free for the time

i should probably ask /his

Both you and whoever came up with this shit should kill yourselves.

Are you clinically retarded or something? How can the most "backward people in all of greece" have been the only ones to field a professional military force, compared to the rest of Greece that relied on a citizen militia?

Yes, goyim, submit yourselves to the shitskins.

You keep mentioning Sparta time and again, but Persia had a beef with all of Greece. And Greece is the birthplace of Western civilization.

Now crawl back to Holla Forums you disgusting sack of shit. I didn't think I could despise your kind any more than I already do, but now that I know you're the reason Cracked is alive I'll have to think of new ways you need to be killed. Throwing you and your family out of the helicopter seems far too gentle a death.

jesus nigger calm down, of course im wary of cracked, they push mind-boggling garbage on people, but you are fucking confused and dogmatically retarded as well, and less/equally qualified to speak on this as the faggot in the video

yeah..very briefly, until they didnt and let themselves be used as a proxy force/5th column by persia to destabilize greece

see this is the problem, I would wager you know fuck all about the period other than a very dim outline, but youre so fucking sure of yourself. one of the most upvoted comments on the fucking cracked video is this:

read a book nigger, I dont know much about persia but I know more than you

le-mao, sure buddy, pass the blunt and dat fawdy. They invaded, twice, they were a fucking empire, boohoo nigger, thats how it worked back then- they did all kinds of shit but they were also pretty damn modern and not fundamentalist lunatics like the spartans for the most part. Generally I side with the defender always but the argument is interesting, and spartans are beginning to remind me of albanians, a brutish, simple people with a tribalistic caste system that are easy to manipulate against their neighbors at the behest of foreign interests

there are one pillar, thank god they are not all- traditionally its greek democracy, roman law, and christian morality

thanks for finishing with a pinochet reference, actually made me laugh and oddly fitting. It also drives home just how little you know about present day geopol, nevermind fucking antiquity

Im throwing pearls to the sows here but this was fun, you take care now and ill take it to /his

Go be a nigger someplace else.

I literally went point for point, thats suprisingly structured for me, way more effort than usual

except I did in the first post already, i can elaborate a bit even though i wont change your mind and you are already at stage 2 of messageboard autism, i.e. "passive aggresssively nitpick and descend into minutia because my stance might be weak"

There are a bunch of things that were western in the sense of modern/civilized that the persians brought to the table, they fielded an actual military paid for with taxes instead of some crazy ass nation of conscripts, they built all kinds of infrastructure, they had a uniform currency, they didnt have fucking slavery for the most part(inb4 thats bad, this has nothing to do with race retard)

they had some representation even, you had a decent fucking life as a "persian" compared to a lot of other places, so long as you didnt revolt and paid your taxes

maybe im using "western" wrong but I would define it as progress basically, you live longer, you have a decent standard of living and prospects to rise in society, you are healthy in body and mind, you arent under fear of death or torture and you have some modicum of free speech

as for the spartans, well to dip into your box of ebonics they were pretty fucking cray cray, nigger. Anybody that kills babies has a few screws loose I dont care what your reasoning is, youre sick, even if you just look at it biologically. They were capable fighters but they had no fucking chance against the military of an actual land empire in the long run, the fight was doomed from the get go, you can respect a people like the japs f.e for their tenacity and still realize they were basically insane

ill gladly mosey on in to answer your outbursts but you really have contributed very little to this con-ver-shay-shun, I should still thank you for giving me a chance to order my thoughts on this somewhat

This is the problem bruh, you instantly assumed I had my mind made up on this shit when nothing could be further from the truth. I merely stumbled on to an argument I had not really heard before, from a questionable source to say the least. this argument reminded me of other things I am a wee bit more knowledgable about, and I brought it up here because this is /tv

Does that not fucking compute for youintentional? someone that hasnt quite made up his mind yet about something? you sure seem oh so fucking certain of yourself

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Was there any films from 2016 worth watching?

Hell or High Water and Blood Father, about it.

I thought Sully was pretty neat, Hardcore Henry was a cool action movie and Sicario is basically 120 minutes of CIA humiliating and ridiculing a strong womyn cop and her pet nigger.

The family stone
Fucking awful

Seeing this didn't made me want to see his other films…

I want to nominate this. Saw only like 15 minutes of it, it was unbearable

Prometheus is probably my pick, it's sad because I'm a huge alien fan and followed the movies production since it's inception years before it released. Saw it in theaters opening weekend. Boy, what a crock of shit: generic nonsensical characters, confusing nonsensical plot that tries to play itself off as intellectual, bizarre religious overtones for no reason, pointless plot twists, sequel baiting, etc. Just utter fucking shit in every way. Lots of people praise it for looking good but in the 2010's pretty much any movie shot on something more expensive than an $8 webcam looks good nowadays. Giving a movie credit for looking good is like giving a shitty cake points for having sugar in it.

There is no difference. Hollywood caught wind that people were sick of remakes so they changed the name and it actually fucking worked.

Prometheus is indeed a stinking pile of dog shit, but the worst ever? Well, at least I watched the whole thing, there's some shit so bad I stopped watching after 15 minutes:

G.I.Joe
Children of Men

Of crap so bad that I'm embarrassed to admit I actually watched them:

Snowpiercer
Hellraiser 3
Behind Enemy Lines: Colombia

This. Whoever made the trailer for this though did a really good job. I was so hyped for this, I watched the trailer over and over again until it finally came out in theaters. This killed any and all hype I will ever have for movies again. Just one big giant disappointment.

this by far

Dracula 2000

Prometheus was good. I was completely satisfied with it. If this is your worst movie, you're either lying or have only seen 2 or 3 movies.

Really bad films I've seen aren't something I dwell on but suicide squad, jungle book and star trek beyond are the most recent really fucking awful movies I've seen.

lindelof pls go

Whatchya sayin', man? This shit looks amazing.

No bait, no irony. We were joking this was the ugliest videogame cutscene we ever saw, until we got to the horse rape part and agreed it was for real. You kids from the 2000s got used to eat shit, but we didn't.

Damn, that one is so bad we have seem to have erased it from out collective memory.

Good thing they're making a show?

persians are white

I have effortless suspension of disbelief, so I rarely find even terrible movies bad.

This had me in fucking tears laughing at how bad it was.

Honestly my top 5:

Christ this was terrible. Just terrible.
the point was literally "Not all X" despite them literally being the stereotypes they rail against.

Shows without Morrison the Wachow…ski? Wakowski? Whatever trannies are rubbish.

NOTHING HAPPENS FOR 2 HOURS BUT LOOK AT HIS SILLY HEAD

Everyone has aids and that's terrible.

It's worse than TFA I swear.

Was taken to see Avatar as my Christmas gift from my cheapass father. Going to the movies never made me so fucking angry.

I've since broken off all contact with my father.

Not a joke post, I hated that movie. Every fucking second of it is revolting. I don't remember the reason I watched it, but after all these years I still feel shame when I remember it.

I miss my dad. He once took me to see Barb Wire for my birthday.

Except for the points where he flips back and forth between human and robot.
The original had a clear path of Robocop recovering his identity piece by piece until he is Murphy again.

Because it flips the entire message of the original film.

w-what?

New Robocop is not only terrible but had no right to exist

It's this, and Kiss Daddy Goodnight, on both ends of the budget scale. Avatar is proof that a big budget doesn't make a movie good, and Kiss Daddy Goodnight is proof that a low budget does not excuse shitty writing. Fuck both of those movies.

I don't miss these movies one bit

how many times do we have to fucking tell you to watch the director's cut user

It was a Short Circuit ripoff, the robot was cute but that's about it.

Short Circuit was a ripoff off The Black Hole.

Guys, why did you have to ruin this for me. She and Nicole Kidman were the only 3DPS who I thought looked perfect. WHY

Because Jew

But they were perfect, the only white, blonde, actual feminine women. And they got blacked, I feel cucked right now.

its a parody you cunt, its the only worthwhile shit in all this thread, this one was designed to be shit and it worked !, its a good movie for stoners.

found the cishet

Gets worse, ol' Kidman spread her legs for Lenny Kravitz for a while there. If you want a woman in Hollywood who hasn't fucked a nigger for social capital, you've basically got Lily Tomlin and Rosie O'Donnell.

And you just realized that now? You are forever cucked as long as the Jews are in charge of printing your money, your life and women are literally toys to them.

pls someone post that shit

This was way worse. Everyone involved should have been executed except Jackman who should have had a finger cut off.

"Richard Gere is a decent actor."
What's wrong with these? I admit, Watts is getting pushed hard, but other than that?

But how can you kill that which is a fridge?

do you think she verbally abuses him in Afrikaans?

maak nie vir my apartheid jy!

I liked it as it's a movie about itself, a dead-inside product created to do nothing but make money

Why do most horror movies are so shit?

Is that Lost or Last Shift?

I actually like the first Grave Encounters cause it made fun of ghost hunting type of people. Second one was dumb though yeah.

It's Last Shift if it's the film I'm thinking about. About some girl cop alone in an old precinct with the ghosts of a manson family type of cult or something.

It's an almost inherently schlocky and exploitive genre

I liked the first one too, but the second had to go full retard and ruin its ending.

It's last shift, it's a complete clusterfuck.

Found the reddit, listening to silly things like "arguments".
Talking seriously, it's either progress, or independence as a nation. And what good is having progress, if you can't opt out of it and go on an adventure? It's the age old dilemma of freedom vs. wellbeing.
I know of you, but I'd rather not trade my freedom for high-tech chains. That's how the guys in charge actually control you. And it's a recurring theme throughout these years, it's almost as if it was predicted.
Even worse, trading your culture, your tradition, your people, for quality of life… Independence as a nation lets YOU choose, the guys in a city-state are all people who you know from living with them. It's different than some guy coming and demanding 10000 golden shekels for tithe to an emperor that you never saw, you don't know, and who doesn't even know about the problems of the land. Yes, Sparta was flawed in the movie, but it's like when the protagonist gets to choose between perfect work or his family with hairy legs and zits and whatnot.
This is all judging from the movie, not aware of /his/ context, nor interested. But I think my opinion wouldn't change that much.
300 is pure kino.

You are always controlled by someone. Freedom is an illusion.

I like horror movies but these new "found footage" ones are unwatchable

I think retarded teenagers somehow got more retarded since the 80s

t. Avraham Benizri

I agree with Pinochet, Persians had beef with the greek city-states because, unlike the rest of the sandnigger lands, refused to surrender, even against the mammoth forces of the pershkikes.

And not even with nigh unlimited money, bribing the senate to open borders, countless soldiers, after litterally burning Athens to the fucking ground, they still lost against the ant sized city states with completely alien and incomprehensible values like "bravery", "justice", "patrotism"; all and all the virtues that make a person better than common cattle and seek to improve oneself.

Western civilization was based on Greek thought, unless your argument is that Sparta as a city state is less of a representation of the West than Persia, which is dumb since the end of the movie shows the Battle of Marathon which had most Greek city states present.

daily reminder that Plato ruined human thought for many millennia

t. Robert Pirsig

It was Holla Forums who proved Plato was right about everything.

how so?

Feels = reals

what does any of this have to do with Plato's cancerous ideas?

Man, what DOESN'T any of this have to do with Plato's ideas?

I know the point of the whole thing is fear leads to irrational behavior and bad decision-making, but good fucking god every single character in this movie is a fucking retard.

That Holla Forums created a thoughtform which then manifested in reality.

Space Chimps
The trailers fucking lied to me