Questionable Malcontent - Rise From Your Grave

kys

It's much funnier when there are people inside. Speaking of which, has anyone seen Barry lately?

This guy actually wants this.

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How does it feel to craft a more comprehensive narrative with better flow in a shitpost than a "professional" artist does with practically unlimited time and resources?

Anti-elitism is the cancer that keeps on spreading.

Exactly the sort of delusional type you expect to see at a liberal arts college: 18 years old and knows everything despite having no marketable skills.

Wait, I'm confused. You guys think there's street smarts or not?

I think "street smarts" (really "non-academic") exists but that's irrelevant. The important part is his condescending know-it-all posturing. People who actually have a clue don't talk like that, i.e. the Dunning-Kruger Effect.

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Thanks Dog.

"Street smarts" is a fucking ubiquitous term; could mean anything from people having enough experience and empathy (think - reading people) to know how to deal with your average person in their daily life; maybe just experience in using average devices, passed down to them from their ancestors (aka mummy and daddy); maybe they mean they learned how to shiv a nigga.
It's a stupid term for stupid people to feel like they're on the same level as everyone else and don't need to get better either at their skills or to improve their thinking.
The other end of the trap is people reading information, but being too dumb to figure out if it's true and applicable in the real world, end up being book smart college know it all's who should be bullied until they start cognizing and stop just parroting.

Bullying the inferior is a gift of God. Use it.

DOC

I MEANT TO SAY DOC

OH GOD WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME

I was wondering if it was 2003 again.

THEN WHO WAS PHONE

Soooo… in the latest comic, is IPP nekkid under dat blanket?

That she had sacks with Cliton and that somehow started a fire?

She couldn't hold back any longer - it is simply in her nature to destroy buildings.
For too long she had suppressed that primal instinct for property destruction while serving the infidels their alcohol and watching them wallow in their degeneracy.
The arrival of he with the stab-proof hand was the straw that broke the camel's back…

"A t'ousand apologies, my friend. But the building, she must be destroyed!"

We haven't ever seen him do any maintenance on his hand. If he was busy playing IPP like a banjo, it could have gotten fluid in the gaps and shorted, causing sparks, causing her alcohol soaked pile of clothes to ignite, causing a fire, causing Jeph to need one less location to draw.

Can someone repost the comic images? I'm not unblocking Handstab's site just to find out how retarded whatever just happened is.

He's really that transparent, isn't he? I could just hear his badly-healed metacarpal tendons straining under the Herculean effort to draw a location that isn't a set of four blank walls and a door.

That's probably why he was trying so hard with that setting. He knew he wouldn't have to do it for much longer, so he didn't get the same apatgetic panic that he gets from other long term commitments to effort.

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That is truly the face of a man that knows defeat.

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Last 5.

Jeph couldn't be bothered to show how the fire started? He probably could have just slipped a sight gag into the second panel and made the whole strip considerably more entertaining.

That is a pretty piss-poor attempt at humor.

If you take it up the ass, it could be your last?

Notice how much more effort he puts into Clarence. The eyelashes, all the metal shit on her face, the hair; Clarence is the only character that gets this sort of attention. If Jeph didn't read this, I bet my left dick Clarence would be drawn with neon-colored bullshit, just so he was more noticeable.

That just gives the rest of us a chance to step up to the plate!

We do good

HANDSTAAAAAAAAAAB

Lel, had a go.

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Not too bad user.

Very nice

It should be working now

Can someone verify

test

Thanks for the help mate. Thread's able to be accessed.

How can someone be so inept that they cannot use a fire extinguisher?

oh thank god this thread isnt 404'd anymore i missed you fags

YOU FUCKER

Someone's prediction from the last thread:

It's already happening

Thanks aplenty, I was worried for a while. And fidgety without my fix

Show of hands on who didn't see that coming?

not unlike an electrical short? I think was onto something. Even if he wasn't diddling her, if he spilled beer onto his hand and started a fire, he's liable for all of the damages.

So, she's going to end up sleeping at clinton's. Relationship inevitably forms. etc. God, this couldn't be more predictable if they tried.

Well, we don't know anything about Clinton's living arrangements. He probably has a roommate, and IPP will jump his bones almost immediately, leaving Clinton to try and block out the sounds of them fucking masturbate while listening to their wet slaps and moans, and have a good cry afterwards.

That will go on for a while, until IPP finally realizes that being amazing in bed does not make up for having a shitty personality and dump the roommate in favor of Clinton Sven, because she happened to be at his place for some reason and she likes the way he turned out after his self rehabilitation.

IPP will move in with Sven, and that will close this chapter of Questionable Content.

There's also the possibility he figured she'd be less of a bitch if she got some action. His inherited homolust kept him from just throwing her a pity fuck, so he let her use his arm to power a Hitachi magic wand. Naturally her own foul ichor ate through to the motor and caused the fire.

Unf.

Iraqi Peppermint Patty is waaaaay more attractive than shitbag Faye, just saying.

Faye's butch lesbian hair and problem glasses fill me with revulsion.

And only in Questionable Cunt Tent can Jeff have a character who others remark as putting on a load of muscle mass, yet they only get fatter.

edit here. im texting this in my bed using my phone. the decision to take a break was made for me on monday or tuesday (lost track of time) because i caught yet another fucking flu (third in a row) thats left my back and neck muscles filled with pain and my intestines full of some wonderful hybrid of napalm and sulphur. ive been on pain killers and imodium for days now, and my toilet has lodged a formal complaint with the hauge under violations of the geneva convention.i'll be back when i can. see you then.

This man requires a very high dosage

Get well soon editfag.

Just take your time and get better. Don't give in to your anger and drag yourself over to the computer when Jeph unveils his brilliantly inovative, never-before-seen, completely unprecidented plot twist where Monday's comic is filler because Jeph doesn't feeeeeeel good. He's hungover, you see, and the headache combined with the nausia made it impossible to work for a few hours and put together today's comic. *sigh* If only he had a buffer. Too bad poor little him is so overworked that it would kill him to put in the extra time to generate one. You know, like that guy who writes and draws Berserk. Like that. That's how overworked he is.

We'll find out all of this from his constant stream of Twitter updates as he fights the good fight and retweets things in an effort to get better enough to draw Tuesday's comic.

This week's dosage is measured in megatons, not kilotons.

Shall I bring the needle, doc?

Assuming this character sticks around, her rewrite will be Hannelore 2.0. It's like Jeph realizes all his characters speak in the same overly verbose fashion and this is all he can do to compensate.

So that's her name.

Stupid as it sounds, I can believe it. If you've never looked at one and are in a panic, you probably don't realize there's a locking pin to pull out. Or you're aiming at the top of the fire.

Hmm, something doesn't sound right. Have you seen any unusual middle aged bald men with Machiavellian aims about?

Some reminders:

Well, I guess I know what I'm drawing next.

I'm sure you'll treat her better than Jeph will.

Rest well editfag, heavens know you've earned it.

pls no die

New edit!

:^)

You have potential.

Now that's a punchline.

Not too bad, I had a chuckle

It's like last year, when a secondary cell of editfags step in when our primary editfag is out for a time.

You have potential mate. Goddamn good punchlines.

Just noticed that her hair doesn't even transfer properly between panels.
Nigger, do you even try at this point?

edit here. you made me chuckle, which sent me into acfresh round of cramps and i had to shuffle to the can before i shat myself. so, y'know, well done.

update: still feel like hell, so im taking the followig week off as well. i think you guys are in good hands.

Well, now you get to say that you made Editfag laugh so hard he shit himself. Add it to your resume.

The shit train chugs on implacably towards its destination. Choo Choo.

She will drive him to his house and sleep there for the night rest of her relevance to this comic.

Also, if Jeph wasn't a complete faggot, he would have put more than 4 measly panels in Friday's and included this whole exchange using the last two of them.

Let me tide everyone over with an omit edit while we wait for an actual person of talent to do funnier shit.

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Out-done already, that was fast.

alternative omit

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Bloody hell Jeph, you're a goddamned terrible writer. All it would have taken would be "I'm on my own" and that'd be the end of this shitty addition.

Then it would be three panels of

She looks exasperated from the repeated edits.

But then he'd reveal even more that he's stretching out one panel of dialog to four. And this is after stretching it to a second strip.

JUST BANG ALREADY

So we have a scene that tells the story of a relationship between Clinton, a character we only kinda know, and the still unnamed bartender. Only that Jeph skips the scene. I'm looking forward to reading all the comments that say, "I don't know what it is, but I'm not feeling any chemistry between these two."

Oh, who am I kidding. They'll eat this shit up. Jeph doesn't even need to try because his audience's standards are so low.

So when's the porn of this bushy browed brown bitch going to be made? Yes, I'm a degenerate why do you ask?

Only a matter of time.

Jeph is the master of suspense. He can draw out
prolong something almost indefinitely. Now all he needs is "fucking anything" to build suspense for.

Drawfag here. Give me a prompt and I'll do it

Clinton and IPP fucking in the back storeroom while booze from a broken bottle tgat they knocked over is sparking a frayed extention chord and lighting a box of napkins on fire.

Iraqi Peppermint Patty pleasuring herself with her shotgun

IPP harpooning her poon

What about the harpoon fucking the shotgun?

And a crying antique clock masturbating off to the side

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Not a clock. A knife block.

Latest edit for you.

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That is both funny and adorably autistic.

Shit, you got me. You got me good, user. I'm a bit light-headed from laughing now.

Fuck off.

Cut me some slack. My wife was all the way back in Germany and a man has needs.

This is why we have waifus.

Eh, seems about right given current events tbh fam

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This will only be acceptable if Brownhilde is of some kind of German descent. Judging by her appearance, it looks like her grandfather fled from Allied forces by heading southeast into Egypt or Turkey, and got a brown wife at some point. That German/Brown kid grew up and married a full-blooded brown person, and so she's 1/4 German. At best.

Knowing Jeph, she's probably full German, but got her nose done and tanned the fuck out of her skin in order to pursue her transracial nature to the fullest. She shaves her head, wears a wig, and has contact lenses to hide her blonde hair and blue eyes. Her eyebrows are 90% extensions.

But user, all those >refugees who are living in Germany ARE Germans! Germany is where Germans live, so anyone living in Germany is a full German!

FUCK. OFF. AND. BANG. ALREADY.

This shitfest of a comic already touts Hannelore and Marten as proudly Germanic names. So it's hardly surprising that Jevf Jox would spring a third one on us now.

Arbeit macht frei.

Get the fuck outta here! Anyway, it's all painfully obvious that Jeph's going to do the old "Hey guys! This is Brunhilde and–why is Emily crying like she came to some important decision about her love-life and is disappointed that I've brought home someone who smells like chickpeas?" routine.

He's been watching Friends reruns, again.

Yep.

How fitting.

>But all those refugees are German!
Fuck you, but mostly fuck Merkel for being a traitor in power.

Have another pseudo-omit.

What I mean to say is that if Handstab intends to pair IPP and Clinton together he should fucking well do it already, instead of stretching this lame back-and-forth plotline out for another 16 weeks while the patreon bux continue to pour in.

But we know he won't, on account of all dat sweet money.

Also, because you mentioned sideways vagoo…

How about a Clinton, Emily, and Iraqi Patty threesome?

I know you're baiting with this, but fucking hell I hate this fucking attitude. That's why relations by blood are important and mix-raced mongrels end up crazy or useless - they don't belong to no group of people's.

Sage for offtopic

Double penetration pegging? You sick fuck. I like the way you think.

It's the same kind of attitude that leads to headlines like "British Man Convicted of Running Child Rape Ring", and when you look inside you see the "British man" is named Mahmoud and blames his inability to follow the law on cultural differences.

I wish I could find that Assigned Male comic where the main character says "I don't have boy parts, I'm a female born with a penis, so my penis is a girl part". The ability of some people to look directly at evidence to the contrary of their claims and still boldly make those claims is astounding.

That might have been an edit, I can't even tell anymore. Please don't put yourself through trying to find it, I wouldn't even do that to myself

Here ya go.
5 seconds on google.

For some reason it *really* gets on my fucking nerves when these stupid characters point a finger up when they say something.
Even more so when they close their eyes.

I mean, where the fuck did this come from? Does *anyone* do this in real life?
And if so, how do they remain un-punched?

ISIS.
ISIS.
They are refugees so any violence dericted towards them is a hate crime.

It's one of the "quirky" things that define his art style, like the "one hand behind head" pose, or the "person yelling at the ceiling in the last panel" punchline.

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Perhaps Questionable Content is merely a front, and ISIS is speaking in code using the forums to communicate. Did Jeph's Patronbux suddenly jump up to their current level at some point, or has it been a steady climb?

What does it say, Holla Forums?

I'm not good at this and I will never be editfag-tier

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I want to like her. I really want. Twice so does my dick.
But Jeph's shitty writing and "art" makes it excessively hard.

Aw shit!

Aw SHIT, guys!

I just realized! IPP AIN'T GOTS NO LIPS!

IT'S A DUUUUUUUUUDE!

oh no

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I want to fuck her eyebrows so bad.

It might not be "her" judging by the absence of lips.
god i'm upset now over this

Fucking hell.

Also: Is it bad that I would a IPP?

I'd bang IPP in portrait.

IPP in profile is ugly as shit.

My cents on it being a Woman transitioning into a "guy", hence the NOT HILDE insistance on the nickname.

Do you smoke?

Well, Hilde does sound kinda bad. Brunhilde is better shortened to Brunnie.

I've got this weird feeling gnawing at the back of my head about Clinton in that I think "Claire" is his fault. I don't know if anyone has mentioned it already but he sounds like the kind of faggot that wants everyone around them to love them so he always tries to please everyone, even when he clearly can see that people around him are doing the most batshit insane things imaginable.
I can pretty much picture him enabling Claire from a very young age, allowing him to do all kind of bullshit (get a tattoo, go ahead and party all night, you're a Bhuddist? great!) just so that he can then go to his father and they both can nod disapprovingly.
Too much insecurity so that he lacks a spine for any real confrontation, always with the rationalization of: "weel it's their lives and I fully support their decisions".
And now it has blown in his face. If handstab had been a semi-competent writer, he would have shown that Clinton is mad at himself for enabling Claire's magical world of whimsy where men can be women and everyone gets a romcom ending.
And now he meets IPP, whom he will try to make a Claire 2.0 but since she's not an emotionally damaged faggot, he'll get the Iraqi boot.
Which could lead him to have a revelation and change as a person or take the cowards way out and leave that circle of people to maybe start over somewhere else.

All I'm saying is that Clinton can potentially be better than Marten without changing the previous QC "lore" (I threw up a little when I typed that).

What did you circle? Am I missing something?

Yeah, a better screen or proper contrast settings, one of the two.
One brow is literally black. Like, #000000 black

No, I see it now. I was looking for something in the linework or an overlap of some kind. Something super obvious like the color slid right past me.

Still pretty good, though.

Honestly, any time I hear some socjus bring up TOXIC MASCULINITY, I can't help but think of Dr. Thrax.

You know, I was sure the rest of the post was going to be you expanding on a theory that Clinton raped Clarence, eventually training him to be his little Lena Dunham hooker-child.

No, Claire is not Clinton's fault. Claire is his abuser's fault and his shrink's fault and, ultimately, CLAIRE'S fault. You can choose to get help or you can choose do stupid shit to yourself.

Case in point: Today, at the doctor's office, I saw an obese white woman of maybe 26 with neck tattoos and a small half-black toddler. She could have gotten therapy for the parental rape, but instead she keeps punishing herself.

Well, if Clarence did seek help and his parents sent him to a shrink that exacerbated his gender dysphoria, then it's the shrink's fault for betraying the family's trust. Unless the parents knew that the shrink had a track record for being a Kool-aid sucking tumblr activist, in which case, it's their fault for doing it on purpose

jeph that's not how women's chests work

How would he know? He's never seen one.

One Google search for "Women's chests in profile" would have fixed his problem.

I feel weird defending him, but to be honest, that is pretty much how low-handing breasts in a bra work.

So Brownhilde has small, saggy breasts? That's rather tragic for a twenty something girl.

She's a Paki/Pajeet/Arab. They don't have the beautiful breasts of European women. The classic Arab/Jewish type is fat and saggy flaps of meat.

Oh god…

What if Brownhilde is the offspring of a rapefugee that went into Germany? Her mother would have named her, which explain the germanic name, and if she's a rapechild, her mother might have ignored or abused her, resulting in her autistic behavior. If English isn't her first language, then the weird speach pattern is just her struggling with our language.

jesus christ not again

This thread sure took a dark turn…

No. I'm fucking allergic to cancer sticks, and even inhaling the smoke particles from a passer-by's clothing sends my allergies fucking apeshit.

In the old days, a German could be depended upon to put down an untermensch.

What a time to be alive.

Today I was looking up info on Cleo, a tech company, and came across this cover for Cleo Magazine. It kind of summarizes everything wrong these days. Also, fuck off Google.

What do you mean, user?

mfw

That's a man, baby.

It just gets stupider.

holy shit…and I though menstro was autistic

So Jeph spends a dozen strips setting IPP as a tough girl who pulls a shotgun on people and runs her own bar and needs no man… only to make her a ditz on par with the protagonist of I Love Lucy, which depends heavily on Clinton?

Way to aim for feminsm ideals, Jeph

We know that in SJW land mental problems = good characterization. Does anyone want to place bets on what exotic psychological problem Jeph will give Iraqi Peppermint Patty?

I'll take the long shot on Daddy-Daughter fetish.

The autism is real

In all honesty, IPP may have TRUE and HONEST autism. Not only is she is even more socially inept than the average QC character, she fucking shuts down in to the point where she stares at the clock(?) and shuts her eyes to avoid eye contact.

This makes my autism flare up.

She's definitely Autistic. Pornfag I request a picture of IPP having consensual sex in the missionary position as she blushes and tries her best to avoid eye contact. Bonus points for her not being sure if she's actually pleasing Clinton due to the fact she doesn't understand normal facial emotions****

That's easy when she's hearing, "YES. YOU ARE PLEASING BIG CLINT RIGHT NOW!"

Jeph discovers ballpoint pens.

Love this passive aggressive jab from Adobe. Big Brother is watching.

You can remove the icon from your dock, moron. Alternatively, change your mouse sensitivity so you're not spastically opening random shit.

Alice Grove continues to impress with its monotony.

She'll still secretly wonder if he's putting on a show for her benefit and forcing himself to ejaculate in her. She'll never know for sure, and it scares her to think that it's all a ruse, but she loves him too much to let go, and that scares her even more.

I have a good feeling about where this is going. There is no way he can pull this off without infuriating his fan base.

Stop it, you're turning me on with this role playing.

Man, that perspective. In panel two changing eye color lady is 12 feet away but in panel 1 she's directly behind Nightcrawler.

I hate these people so much. Creepy fetishists of the mentally ill and disadvantaged. They treat these people like they're art pieces instead of human beings that suffer from conditions often beyond their control. It's dehumanizing and disgusting.

And no way is that asshole an autistic. Probably one of those "self-diagnosed" faggots.

His shirt's bamfed back on as well

There's more of that fetishism and self-diagnostics in the thread and some other spergs objecting to it but it's too scattered to screencap properly. That's one of the problems combing the forum for material: everyone's so scatterbrained and verbose that you kind of have to take in the collective illness as a whole.

What's worse is they're a psych major.
I've never, in all my life, heard someone say, "OMG AUTISM WOW!!" in a positive way. I've met autists had a roommate with Assburgers, once too, and their autism is never considered in a positive light.

Is the inventor of Virtue Signaling in Hell yet?

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Bullshit. No one gave a shit about Claire until the handstab when she became a Tumblr vessel. Before that the complaints were about how generic the interns were collectively, especially the revelation that Emily was written as a very attractive, exotic looking, upbeat women of approximately 25 years old with the social connections of a four year old.

Editfag, here. Diagnosed with "high functioning" assbangers Aspergers and I can state for the record that I'd be willing to give up AT LEAST a couple of toes for the cure. "High functioning" is a medical term that means "You're provably handicapped, but everyone (including friends, lovers, and family) will just assume you're an asshole for the first 4 decades of your life until someone with training finally catches on and gets you some help."

The spegs who think we're "the next level of human evolution" and not some horrible dead-end are delusional as fuck.

It's like Jeph's DARING me to come at him.

This chick is Flesh Menstro.

Also, Clinton without his glasses has somehow managed to become "prettier" than Claire, which means everything we've always suspected about Jeph and self-inserts is totally true.

That forum might be full of dumb shits, but it's a hell of a step up from SinFest's forums (last I looked).

>using the word delusional
>in [CURRENT YEAR]

Calling it now, soon they'll be banning Delusion from the English dictionary. Assuming, of course, that Trump doesn't make America great again.

I'm sorry to hear about your condition. I'm ever sorrier to hear that you're Arthur Chu. I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but if you're Chu you're not in any way high functioning.

Bueno.

YOU FUCKING HACK HOW CAN YOU BE THIS BLIND

At least he's not Burch.

Holy shit, she is legit autistic. Fucking hell, Jeph.

Today was an alright day.

That was OC? I'm impressed. And both times it was directed at me.

Well that was just a combo of pics related, I did a batch with some other faces but that one was by far the best.

Holla Forums: ships in the night

Fuck off with your vanilla bullshit. She should be a dead-eyed cold fish in bed, like autistic chicks actually are.

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you say that like its a bad thing

The worst part would be trying to get her to that point. Clinton probably won't know how to deal with her 'tism, so if he goes so far as to lean in close while they're standing on the starlit hotel balcony and say she's very beautiful while gently tracing a path between her shoulder and her ear with the edges of his lips…she'd stare at him blankly before curling up into a ball in the corner because she can't handle the stress of figuring out what he wants.

Good OC gets around. It perfectly captured my feeli gs towards her, so out it comes.
I feel the same way when people use my creations I imagine it's a watered down version of what parents feel when their kid goes to school and comes home knowing cool shit

Your oc is mine now, motherfucker!

But user, you are the OC.

…no…

Search your feelings…you know it to be true.

Makes perfect sense… Autist with shit social skills whose first response to new people is to pull a weapon on them, working in a bar.

Maybe somewhere in QC-verse there's an employment agency which really doesn't give a fuck.
With luck we'll also see a blind dentist or a truck diver with chronic narcolepsy.

We know for certain the agency that assigns robot companions doesn't give a fuck, the fucking FBI gets bullied by a barista and apparently the government recruits secret agents from the drunk and unemployed.

The government in the QCverse is absolutely fucked up, since this is the dark future where SJWs seized control.

Or a service industry business owner who goes out of her wy to belittle and insult her customers.

Maybe Dora knows she's in the bad future. Maybe she lashes out angrily at whoever and whatever she can find, trying to bring their warped society to its knees so a new one can rise from the ashes, but her SJW indoctrination sublimates the rage into passive-aggressiveness rather than physical violence. She's lost in a sea of social justice, but every action she takes to break the chains merely reinforces them.

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user…

Stop trying to make me like her, Jeph
I don't want to regret this later

It's spreading.

An attempt was made.

This is pretty spot-on. I graze the upper end of the spectrum, and I'll tell you, it certainly hasn't won me any favors.

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And I was about to sit down and do something about that.
Beat me to the punch, fucker.

Need less expression in those big bushy eyebrows and more titty exposure.

Do it anyway. The more the merrier!

Wonder if handstab would appreciate knowing about this

Nice work!

Though I think it would be better if she had this face on the whole time:

If he did that, it would be fun to see the backlash from feminists because consent needs to be active and continous.

Asking before each thrust?

If at any time during sex the partner says, "No, stop, I don't want to anymore", you gotta stop. Otherwise, it is RAPE.

I could find this explenation of the subject: thinkprogress.org/health/2014/06/25/3453041/affirmative-consent-really-means/
So, appart from turning the burden of proof on its head, it would easily exclude anyone (not extremely high-functioning) autistic from ever having sex.

No, see , if they don't smile or act happily enough you've got to stop.

No, see , if they don't smile or act happily enough you've got to stop.

Well, yes, that would be rape.
But isn't about rape, it's about power (see what I did there)

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Laci Green has a video where she basically says something like, "It has to be Yes! Yes! YEEEES! Her just going mmmm or ooooo isn't enough! And you have to keep asking is it okay now? How about now? Still okay? Really? Really really? You're not just saying that?"

The self-proclaimed sex expert appears to be a virgin because anyone who's had sex before knows that's not how any of it works. It's like she's an alien attempting to pass herself off as human.

That's called "life" asshole. You really think he wants to spend all Saturday visiting your mother? Fuck no. But he goes along with it because relationships supposedly involve compromise.

More alien talk. This shit is really, really obvious to normal people. Yeah, there's ambiguity and uncertainty the first time around but once the bonding forms it's pretty clear whether she's in the mood or not.

No, it's killing the mood. Women don't want to hear this. As evasive as they can be, they will be direct on this matter. They will tell you, flat out, that they want to be "rescued" by a confident, take charge guy who shows her a good time. She doesn't want to be asked if it's okay to go here on a date, if it's okay to kiss her, if it's okay to fuck her for the 9,255th time. This is super basic stuff understood intuitively by both sexes, and early on, except for the unfortunate fooled manginas who get into their 40s and 50s without learning their lessons.

And most other people.

I know this is an apples and oranges type of comparison but it seems that Clinton was the responsible adult in that hot mess that calls itself a family.
Dad blows his brains out, mom is a trophy wife airhead. If clinton had slapped Clarence in line more than once, maybe you'd have a sensible adult in your hands.
I know it's not fair to enforce an older child the role of an adult but that's the essence of a tragedy. Having Clint step up and be a fucking man already puts him head and shoulders above the rest of the beta brigade.
And you can't even blame him because what would you have done in this situation? it's hard to fill in the shoes of a dead father.

Blaming himself for what Claire has become could be Clint's arc, or maybe I'm just overthinging a dumb handstabbing fuck's meal ticket.

It's possible for Jeph to have his cake and eat it too. If he tells the story of how Clinton blamed himself for Claire's "mental illness", but ended it by saying "But now I know that it's just the way she is, and I'm okay with that", his fanbase won't lynch him for daring to have trans people in anything but the most positive light.

Lots of implied cuckolding

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hey this
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writing is
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really fucking awfull

Legit Autism is a helluva drug.

A violent, ugly, homeless, autistic, german arab (rapefugee spawn?). Clinton just stept out of the ashes and into the fire.

Face needs to be expressionless or full cumbrains to stay true

C'mon, she's cute. El Stabbo will write her into the ground, but I'm willing to go headcanon for this one.

Should we save her along with Hanners?

No

Why is this even a question?

Save her like Holla Forums saved that one chick from that sjw bard rpg
Drawing a blank and a half.

I want to cum on her eyebrows.

You mean Erin? White Korra?

That's Teagan.
And there's no saving Erin now.

Ah, right. I forgot about Teagan. I want to marry her

Anyway, insert some witty text on your own, I can't come up with a fucking joke that isn't "allahu akbar"

...

The hell happened to Erin?

user has one of those custom incline beds.

The one where it sepparates you down the spine so your boobs can face in completely opposite directions?

Just saying, but decently sized tits do, in fact, flab around in two different directions when boob-wielder is laying on the back.

B cups are not that heavy

Well, that really depends on the level of sag.

You tell him!

Hypothetically, but they are drawn tight the chest

Perhaps they are in motion.

...

Dear Twitter Bully: please respect Jeph's wishes and inundate him with all the edit's he can't handle.

Why does his use of spic animal names bug me so much?

I'm trying Jeph, but I just can't seem to find the downvote button on this internet hate machine!

👎

I'm assuming this is Jeph's idea of bait and he's not this stupid.

Oh, yes, I am sure your nu male lifestyle of making 4 GROIN-GRABINGLY good panels and then spending all day on twitter really leaves you with zero hours in the day and absolutely poop't.

Don't forget his quarterly paid vacations conference appearances.

TIL autists are the chattiest motherfuckers on the Internet.

Don't know why this guy was downboated. He's right: this thing needs a Walkyverse-style reboot and a hard decision on which five or so characters to focus on. And it's something butt buddy Willis can help with.

It bugs me because I like axolotls and I do not want them associate with his bitch life.

Well, at least one guy in this thread said something that makes sense.

Who gives a fuck about Reddit

Why are you even there

lol, poop jokes.

Bored.

If I were Editfag, this would be the most satisfying thing I had ever read. You're making Jeph crash into slumber.

Top quality writing as usual, Stabbykins.

This ALREADY feels like an edit.

...

I wonder what kind of gut wrenching internal reaction handstab had a few weeks back.

Like he wrote Clinton as being totally justified and doing things as a reasonable person would. But then he had to meet an autistic girl and act totally whipped.

I mean why did he walk her INTO HER HOTEL ROOM? They met two hours ago. Why is he coming back the next day? Doesn't he have a job or school stuff? Doesn't SHE have to go out tomorrow to deal with insurance or replacing her destroyed stuff? The idea that he'd come running first thing in the morning, and that she'd be there waiting to call him a good boy, is absurd on so many levels I legitimatley wonder how the thought occured to him.

...

and i read every fucking god damned strip of it out of morbid curiosity
what the fuck am i doing to myself
when did my life go so fucking wrong

oh so exploitable.

Drawfag/Pornfag called it. Clinton's in her room, now they just need to bang.

It is destined.

Maybe it's Clinton's fault the bar burned down and he feels guilty.

Not that we'd know that due to Jeph's impeccable writing.

Revised 4 U

My fellow connoisseurs.

Honestly- brown girls, tomboys, short hair, thick eyebrows, reverse-traps… It's like every other week these socjus types discover something else I like and try their damndest to ruin it.

Lord help them if they ever try to take cyborgs away from me.

I guess they bonded off-screen and are friends now. We'll hear all about this night's wacky shenanigans and relationship-building moments second hand, from people standing around talking to each other when they should be working instead.

I'm with you, though probably just since 2007 or 8 or something like that. Without these threads I think I would have quit somewhere around The Trappening. I was already doing the thing where I'd forget to check "for a few days" only to discover it'd been about two weeks.

Despite the meme of "QC was always shit" there are obvious quality differences in both storytelling and art aspects between its peak and low(s). The "shitness" isn't consistent. The comic's quality has been declining for years, ever since The Breakup and probably slightly before–as the art had already started deteriorating by then as recently discussed. There have been some comparatively good parts, but it's like a parent with Alzheimer's: the "good" days come less and less frequently.

It's funny that readers are thinking that QC is winding down. Obviously Jeph can't do this but he's checked out so much he's giving that impression. Had Alice Grove taken off I could see it but Jeph has literally nothing else going on in his life other than QC. It'd be one of the most aggressively suicidal career moves I'd ever seen, and if there's anything Jeph isn't, it's aggressive. At least not since 2003, where quitting your job to write webcomics full time was a bold move. He was probably fired for doodling at work 8 hours a day.

"Racist! Sick filth! Won't even give them a chance based on the color of their skin?!"
"Disgusting. You're fetishizing and objectifying them and using your white male appropriating imperialism to conquer their bodies like some exotic land."

Replace "brown girls" with anything and change some of the adjectives and it's basically like that with any male preferences.

...

Sure, I'll bite.
I'm probably going to hell for this, but I'll bite.

I have a soft spot for autistic girls of an ethnic minority. My ex was one.

Your revised picture of IPP and Clinton was almost the same ratio as the last panel of Handstab's latest waste of time.

CLEARLY IT WAS MEANT TO BE.

So nice it posted twice.

Not anymore

This edit warms my heart.

This distortion somehow makes it lewder.

It's like I want to look away but some strange beauty draws me back in.

NOW DRAW HER WITH A DICK

Coincidence? I think not.

At least Quasimodo gets touched.

He also got cucked.

Yeah but she dies in the original so it works out.

>Sequel where he gets a girl has subpar music
Quasimodo's life is suffering.

...

I'm getting Moon over June vibes.

Whatever happened to that god awful thing anyway?

I'd google it and check myself but I don't want to risk seeing that horrific art from the nether realms of madness.

Honestly, it reminded me of Doonsbury first.

THANK YOU, BROWN AUTIST

As I was editing this in Paint, I came to the realization that this strip almost doesn't even need a loss edit; it already follows the form as is.

I feel slow for not noticing earlier.

Holy jihadist shit, my fucking sides.

T-that's beautiful.

You're answering your own question there.

It's like every single strip is precisely calibrated to be as obnoxious as possible

He has spent over a hundred moons honeing his technique to perfection. I would expect nothing less from the master himself.

Isn't that the entire point of dating foreign chicks, bringing your cock to strange and exotic pussies? SJWs really do ruin everything.

THANK YOU, BROWN AUTIST

THANK YOU BROWN AUTIST

THANK YOU BROWN AUTIST

THANK YOU BROWN AUTIST

What probably has sweet tits and a swedish grips

Oh, it's a fucking shit-show for genuine spergs, especially when you appear normal but with an appetite for social destruction to those around you, while you think you're doing great right up until the mob shows up with torches and pitchforks.

On that note, I'm seriously thinking about retiring from the QM edits. It looks like you guys have things handled, here, and I'm not sure I have anything more to say on the subject, or at least not at the moment.

The most satisfying thing for me would be him posting "By the time you read this…"

The coming months will be dark, indeed.

I….I don't want this to end!

Goodbye, so soon
And isn't this a crime, we know by now that time knows how to fly.
So here's goodbye, so soon.
if you do stop edits, I hope you still post here. You are pretty cool, m8

Please, Jeph can't even do that now.

Well that's a damn shame.

F.

That's a shame. Though handstab sent you a nice parting gift if you do decide to retire.

twitter.com/jephjacques/status/733381727658237954

...

...

New "comic".

So, is Clint getting lectured on how his mom can be as much of a slut as she wants or something?

Is he gonna get in on the action?
I might need to get my sketchbook out

It doesn't have to. I've seen some good stuff while waiting for my body to return to an approximation of normal. If you look at the older edits, they're shit. All it takes is someone willing to get in there and keep punching until he or she gets the flow, then watch as Jeph stabs himself, again.

Thanks. You're all cool, as far as I'm concerned. As for posting, yes I will, but you won't know who I am at that point unless someone has questions about fonts or something.

Motherfucking Chelsea Van Fatmountain. I'm not going to lie, guys, if I ever found a genie in a bottle, my first wish would be to get to work uninterrupted on her smug face for an hour with a crowbar. She'll get hers one of these days, but I worry that we'll never get to hear about it. Wish number two would be the same only with Jeph chained to a wall to watch.

Thanks, folks. Frankly, I'm still surprised I managed to make it this long. A sane man would have quit around #100.

Now…if only I could find some way to get the Stevenfags to release me from my rash promise…

Before I forget, some user made this awesome little number a few threads ago, and it should be used next.

Good for her.

I still hate the cliché of "lover goes to the front door in undress", though. No sane person acts like that.

You know, one time I tried having sex with an older woman. I wanted to do it while I was still young so I could say I did it. I found some woman who was 42, literally twice my age at the time, and she had some decent tits so I thought I'd give her a try.

Worst fucking sex I've ever had in my life, and that includes my first time when I came after 30 seconds. You know how middle-aged and old people like to make small talk over mundane horse shit that nobody cares about because it's the pre-internet version of liking each other's statuses? She did that. In the middle of fucking. Here I am trying to get lost in the mood and she's ruining it by asking me how my classes are going.

Moral of this story: Older women who fuck younger men do it because they didn't have the skills to get one when they were younger and still don't now.

I don't think that applies to widowed MILFs, though. They had the skills to land a husband, but he got his hand caught in a meme turbine or something. That kind is probably great in the sack.

Wait, this is starting to sound familiar…

Tell them you died.

So, having a vagina and not being obese?

Cool, good to know you are sticking around.
Don't worry, I won't tell anyone when I recognize your filenames:^)

I recommend telling them to go eat a dick, and just stopping.

Editfag is right, though. There are other people making edits, OC and stuff. This thread has gotten pretty good.

And probably giving a mean blowjob.

I mean, I would prefer a happy blowjob if I had a choice in the matter.

What are you, gay

Being willing to give oral in any capacity will significantly increase any woman's market value.

Happy ones are long, loving affairs that involve lots of touching and "I love you"s.

Mean ones are where she tries to suck you inside out and her tongue could polish a door knob.

Heres a few more I just made. May need some tweakin on the borders and headlines. Just went through my folder and grabbed some faces. If anyone else has some good ones lemme know and I can try and add em

...

I dunno, I think I'd like a MILF asking about my classes. It's a real Mrs. Robinson vibe.

Boy, this could have been a real emotionally engaging scene if Jeph knew how to write characters.

A real capeshit would be getting away with that because the make the whole volume at once and sell it for 99 cents with the good writing baked in not community content. Not anymore, but still.

...

Yo ,edit, I'm kinda curious.
If one were to make a completely different comic out of jephry's bullshit characters, say, one where Marten went insane and discretely murdered all his cancerous companions, and framed clint or something, what's the most damage I can expect from handstab's fanbase

Do you mean like the way Edit did, where he changes the dialog, or drawing a new comic, starring Jeph's characters?

Jesus, those punches look weak.

I kind of owe them. They were telling me how awesome I was back when I woke up every day thinking fondly of suicide. They got me through some hard times with their horrible little show about space lesbians and Jews. I hate to repay that with anything less than my best. On the other hand, I know more about that fucking show than any non-fan should. I mean, I REALLY know too much about the deepest lore. About the only thing I don't know is which clinic was the one Rebecca Sugar used to get her penis removed?

I think you got screwed over with a "nervous talker" for your MILF.

Absolutely nothing. They're all manlets and dykes who'd rather wreck your life through twitter than confront you… and I don't have a twitter.

Now…if you want to talk about the MENTAL damage, expect Jeph dreams once a month or so.

I'd be lying if I said I won't miss doing the edits, but I've got to find something else to occupy my creative time. I had dreams of being a writer before I found out how gamed the whole fucking business is, or maybe doing my own webcomic, although I'm sure making one is a one-way ticket to suicide, these days. Maybe I'll do a blog with images, like Gweenbrick or something. Suggestions are welcome, by the way. I yearn for a creative outlet that will keep me free of the SJWs and their bullshit.

I hear the Metal music industry is refreshingly SJW free.

Fair enough, I think many of us have dealt with shit like thatpretty common for imageboard users so I get where you are coming from.

If you want to become a professional writer, yes, shit is fucked. Just like the visual arts nowadays is all about connections and making "statements" or selling a product, professional writing is fucked in. Still, I say go for it. Write shit for the pleasure of it. Get a page and write stuff that you can put out there.

Mostly, yes. But they are also trying to get their claws into it. Slowly, some people in the metal scene are going full SJW. Although, many metalheads are resisting and calling out their bullshit.

Fuck's wrong with you? You have a wife and kids. There's no excuse, man.

You're through, then? Sounds like you've made up your mind. Having tried doing this myself, I don't blame you for your decision, but goddamn will we miss you, you glorious faggot. You singlehandedly paved our autistic little corner into the immortal annals of Holla Forums history. Never forget that.

There couldn't have been a better time to post that secret project I was working on. Too bad I never finished it. pic related.

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┓┓┓┓┓┃ ノ)　
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No editfag plz don't go.

The latter.

Fucking captcha, every time I fill it out, I forget to post what I was going to post until the next day.

We're in autosage. You don't actually have to sage, anymore.

Man, you could scoop up all his retarded fans and their money if you made it better…although he'd probably sue your ass.

Sue me with what? I SERIOUSLY doubt he actually holds a copyright to QC.

He's got it copyrighted from 2003-20016.

Hmmmm. So, it's either a typo and, by the end of the year, I'll be able to fuck Jeph's asshole raw, or Jeph spent way too much money on a thing he absolutely doesn't need. Again.

...

The old Editfag is dead, long live some one else, please

Editfag never dies. It's a mantle to be passed on, like Batman or Paul McCartney.

Editfag is dead, long live Editfag!

Day 2

I think you're right. I searched US copyright records and found no reference to Questionable Content or Jeph Jacques. Well, other than Jephthe-Lous Jacques

LOL. Jeph makes a mistake like this virtually every strip.

ACTIVATE IT

It's hard to copyright webcomics but at least the published volumes should be. I don't think he has a trademark either.

My understanding is that copyright law has a sort of built-in benefit of the doubt for small-time artists / one-man operations- they're treated as automatically holding the copyright to their work unless they're engaged in a legal agreement stating otherwise. It's the reason I don't have to file copyright paperwork every time I produce an illustration.

If you've created a character / IP that you're especially attached to, though, then filing for the copyright is a sensible precaution.

Editfag doesn't have to be your audience anymore.
Editfag is dead.

So, if someone were to make a comic using exact likenesses of Jeph's characters, and file copyright immediately, he could sue Jeph for making QC?

I dont understand what you are trying to convey.

He was never our audience. We were his audience.

It's a reference to Gamasutra's Gamers are dead, etc. article.

You'd be fine, as long as you classify it as "Satire". Fair Use, and all that jazz.

No, I'm saying that we sue Jeph because he's using our copyrighted characters.

This isn't an edit? Did Handstab really call himself out for tumblrnose?

I'm certain that such an attempt would amount to nothing. Jeph would be able to demonstrate that he was the characters' originator, having established their names, appearances, personalities kek and so forth long before our filing for the copyright. If anything we would be the ones liable to end up in legal trouble.

I see what you mean.

I still fully support the making of "Quest yon Able: Count Ent" or whatever you decide to call it.

Suing over unregistered copyrights is very difficult. It's likely that a court won't even hear the case, especially after a relevant 2010 Supreme Court decision. Retaliatory suits where registration occurs after infringement rarely work, either.

I guess you're thinking from the opposite angle: someone coming after you. That's pretty rare, especially these days with the vast majority of artists leaving a giant paper trail all over the Internet. When it does happen, the offending party generally really is using existing IP.

Jeph should at least register the QC trademark and since he's actually published the material, he should copyright those volumes.

Copyright law has provisions for false registration attempts in section 506 Criminal Offenses:

(c) Fraudulent Copyright Notice. — Any person who, with fraudulent intent, places on any article a notice of copyright or words of the same purport that such person knows to be false, or who, with fraudulent intent, publicly distributes or imports for public distribution any article bearing such notice or words that such person knows to be false, shall be fined not more than $2,500.

(e) False Representation. — Any person who knowingly makes a false representation of a material fact in the application for copyright registration provided for by section 409, or in any written statement filed in connection with the application, shall be fined not more than $2,500.

Section 409 is the nuts and bolts of registration: your name, work title, publication date, etc.

polite sage for self-shilling
Editfag, you will be sorely missed.
Your retirement thoughts have made me wonder if, perhaps, I couldn't also try my hand at adapting some horrid webcomic… and I would like your expert opinion on the matter
it's all in this thread; if you have been running away from Willis' work for the past few years like any sane person should, reading up on the original will help you situate everything's context.
Anyway, my "work" is at the bottom, and I would appreciate feedback and fair criticism if needed. Especially with the fact that dumbing of age's dialogs have much less space than QC's, forcing me to reduce to quick-witted speeches.
I thank you in advance and dearly hope for your future happiness amongst dozens of hot bitches. Or lads if you're into that, you sick freak.

Questionable copyright laws: the thread

Welcome to hell.

Good call. I keep meaning to do a HFY that's been kicking around the ol' noodle.

I just deleted my bookmarks to QC and to Jeph's colon talking twitter. I'm out. I imagine I'll find some way to continue contributing on Holla Forums, but I won't

There's no excuse for actually going through with it. Feeling that way, though? I pray no one here evers has to deal with it in themselves or in loved ones. Depression's one of the most insidious things ever, and most people won't even realize they have it until it's too late. It's a living, breathing animal, and it fucking hates you and everything about you, including the things you love the most. Nearly ended up divorced before my doc stepped in with an 11th hour save because he realized what was happening. No one else, including me, understood what was happening to me. These days, I've had therapy and training that lets me recognize and deal with the dark times, and communicate it to my wife so she doesn't think I suddenly hate her and the kids for no reason.

I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

Maybe Zoe Quinn.

AND Leigh Alexander.

Val, you're a relentless namefag AND you saged, but I'll give you tips, anyway. Firstly, names are earned. I didn't name myself editfag or painanon, I was honored with them by the others because I made them something they enjoyed. Now that I'm done QM, I'll just be user, again, in here, unless specifically addressed with questions. I know you won't stop, but you really should.

Re: Cumming of Rage. You're stuff's pretty good, and I've found time hones the pacing of edits, so if you keep at it, you can only improve. I would caution you, though, because if there's a comic more rage-inducing than QC, it's any of the Walky shit. You'll have an ulcer before your first year is up. Best of luck, though.

mfw

Actually, I'd like a redo on that statement, since I realize now it's retarded.

People have no excuse when they know what they're dealing with and can get help, but a lot of people can't get help in their medical systems and a lot of others aren't diagnosed in time. So, I guess I'm saying there are plenty of reasons for it to happen, but I don't feel I, personally, have an excuse.

I'm aware regarding the name, don't worry; I've been doing it before Holla Forums was even a thing, over at halfchan, so I apologize but I won't stop indeed. I am not using it so that people totally suck my dick, don't worry, and I don't try to bring attention to it; most people tend to not even notice, which I appreciate.
I'm thankful for your kind words; I do sincerely enjoy what you've put out all this time, so your positive opinion is quite the support. I am much too painfully aware of Willis' drivel and disgust-inducing work, but I'm French, which implies I've had to suffer through much more mediocre, pretentious and worthless in terms of art/writing. I hope I'll be good.
If not I'll have another amazing reason to kill myself at least.

Yeah, I know, but I thought it was worth a shot, because your work will be judged by others based solely on it. Since we're on the subject, though, why the name? I'm curious. I'm also curious about all the sageing.

Losing my fucking mind, I am. "But I won't be doing any edits of QC for the foreseeable future." I'll probably lay low for awhile and eventually a me-shaped space will open up, somewhere.

Incidentally, I assume this is already understood, but for the record: Jeph didn't break me, I'm just ready for a new victim project.

I'll be trying to make archive images of all the edits, fonts, etc., but it's going to have to be split up over a few of them due to filesize restrictions.

If it saves space, you might want to consider just making zip files or whatever and renaming them to look like pdf files.

Oh saging is merely a polite way to say "I'll be somewhat offtopic/please don't mind me/I messed up/etc." I've always seen it as simply trying to be polite while other people are still discussing
I didn't think sage was ever something people felt would be misplaced or annoying to be honest.

Jeph headlined the panel on tone policing.

Jeph Jacques: all scatological all the time.

Hey, fatass, maybe if you didn't eat toast covered with syrup and ice cream you wouldn't have to emergency shit 45 minutes later

Whoever had that theory that this comic's being rebooted with Clinton and Eyebrows the Arsonist is onto something.

Jeph looking good as a 55 year old man.

Re: someone else suing you for your own work. Funny, it just happened (DMCA is technically a legal claim). And of course it was from Family Guy, a show whose constant pop culture references and line-for-line recreations "parodies" couldn't happen without heavily leveraging existing IP.

Of course, this is YouTube, where anything goes in terms of copyright claims. You could put up a video of your back yard and some corporation or copyright troll will claim it.

Well, I was posting under the assumption that none of the anons in this thread are large corporations who can get away with that sort of legal skeeviness.

Do it.

Could you tell me where the fuck that carrot-fucking thing came from?

I would legit pay for a Menstro in Wartime comic, jesus christ. Imagine, a time before all the pissing and whining about being built to kill and just going through the motions with the rest of the squad. I guess that would make her robo-prepubescent?

Glad to see you're doing it under your own volition, rather than madness. I look forward to the archives.

——-
But until then, lets have people freaking out over reglar human sexuality. Why must Jeph resort to irrationality to create plot development..

I also noticed Jeph has apparently gone back to Claire not having lips anymore.

claire looks more like jeph in that 3rd panel

It's coming full circle.

>menstro 05_22_2016 copy.png
Infringement reported.

Yes, do tell.

...

Kek. Photoshop automatically appends "copy" to the end of a filename when saving off a draft. I usually remember to remove it. Then again, I also forgot the infinity Holla Forums signature I usually include, so double-dumbass on me, I guess.

It's okay, you've had a little too much LDS.

Good idea to keep this up. Your stuff is leaking onto cuckchan.

Claire looks like an overweight man Because he is
…man, FUCK JEPH!

I hope it was recorded. He's been there a few times, I'm webming a few now.

Pic related is what popped up while I was searching for it. Even the botnet knows.

How many searches does something need before it starts to show up in other people's autofill? A thousand? Ten thousand? What if each of us Googled "Jeph Jaques Gloryhole Video" ten times every day for a few weeks, how long will it be before other people felt curious about the mystery video that google is prompting them to look for?

It works better if you memepost in the comments on a site that lets you. The trick is realizing which site(s) care about SEO and which ones use shitty JavaScript that blocks indexing.

is right, it depends on SEO, native SEO at that. If someone were to make a site and write about seven paragraphs linking handstab and glory holes, targeting a location, and then updating it once a week, it might start autocompleting in areas. I'm not really an expert in this, I pay a guy for my SEO.

Speaking of, I am having trouble getting this interview postable, and the other is 40 min long, so here's a mirror. I'll probably have to snip up the panel I found with less than 40 views because the upload sites I know are garbage

u.teknik.io/QcxRa.webm

The fuck is wrong with his lips?

Took the liberty of making a new thread