FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

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>>523617314eeeeeyyyy cuckboy

Burn his kingdom to the ground, no one shucks your corn but you.

what an absolute chadburn his kingdom, slaughter his people, and salt his soil

>>523617314Look at that smug bastard

porn mods out yet?

in my game i had TWO sons fathered by my wife's boyfriend , and the same two sons were both killed by another guy, pretty heavy cucking

did they do the historical thing and let everyone raid or is it still just paganiggers

>>523617491What does salting soil do?

Should I buy this game or give CK2 another run?

>>523618076makes it taste good

>>523618076burning the seedling, so no crops for you next year

>>523618076Dumbass

>>523618083Its a dollar on Microsoft Game Pass so really its up to you

>>523618076you have to add salt and pepper or plants wont grow correctly

I fucking love the portraits and that they reflect traits to good.>>523618083Give CK2 another runt if you're not tired of it. CK3 got some good stuff like dread and the ability to fuck around with your religion but CK2 is still got more features.

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>>523618076makes your potatoes salty which was considered a bad thing before the invention of chips by King Lay XIV

>>523618291thanks history user

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>>523618083CK2 if you already have all the DLC. CK3 might be the better game in a year or two though so you might want to just stick with CK3 if you don't.

Is CK3 the better game to play for a total beginner to the series?

>>523617314what game is this? please answer truthfully

How the fuck do I find out when my Truces break. I've been trying to declare a Holy War on Cathar England for ages and it won't tell me when my Truce ends. I swear in CK2 it just told you when you hovered your mouse over the truce alert.

CK3 still isn't for sale in Australia FFS

>>523618498on your character panel under alliances it also shows wars and truces

>>523618496CK3

>>523618487No because it's not as good as 2. Just because you're a beginner doesn't mean you should play the worse game.

>>523618505Pirate it faggot

>>523618487yeah its more streamlined

>>523618668I thought the version up on torrent were confirmed to have miners and keyloggers

>>523618505Can't handle the incest?

>>523618505pirate it, buy on a key site, give microsoft $1 or wait a few days and it will be on steam

>>523618498Truces are always on the side of the attacker, so if you started the previous war it should be on your character sheet next to your alliances.

>>523618806the australian rating organisation is just horrifically slowNZ had a similar hold up but got it sorted out before release

>>523618784What are they gonna log in to? My bank account with no fucking money cos I live in cucktoriaDangerous dans gonna have his whole family raped one day

>>523619020>>523618550Thanks anons. Silly place to put it.

>>523619139the blame is on paradox for waiting until

>>523618076It shows how extremely asshurt you are about something.example: Romans in Carthage

>>523617314Can you impale people in this game?

>3 fucking cuck events happens in a quick row, one being my son and his motherFor fucks sake Sweden

>>523620052>ending all your speeches with "carthage must be destroyed"lmao rent free

how to expel the jews?

>>523620526

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>no RISE WITH THE STORM, VIKING GODS

>>523620438>disallow Carthage from having an army>neighboring states decide to steal territory since nothing can stop them>Carthage raises an army to defend itself>"WTF CARTHAGE IS ABOUT TO DESTROY ROME HANNIBAL 2.0 INCOMING AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA">Carthage is destroyed, the ground it stood on is salted and settlers are disallowed from living in a certain radius from the cityRomans were incredibly autistic.

Do other vassals and rulers just don't bother with you as long you don't expand your territory?I have spent four generations blackmailing, cucking, disgracing and assassinating people (including three emperors, a king, an imperial heir and an imperial princess) while not expanding past my single castle in Strassburg and I have yet to face a single attack on my lands.The whole fucking HRE is collapsing around me and yet no one is attacking me, this is despite the fact that a lot of those assasination attempts failed and my involvement was found out.

>>523620526Asking real questions here.

>>523620827Interesting, i didn't know text were capable of transmitting cancer.

user: Interesting, i didn't know text were capable of transmitting cancer.Kenshiro: OMAE WA MO SHINDERUAnon: NANI?!?!ryu from street fighter: heh

>>523621430>Ryu from SF giggling>not Ken or someone else smugPlease rewrite this, it's inaccurate to Ryu's martial autist hobo character

>>523620827>George floyd: dame da ne, dame yo dame nano yo

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>>523618487autists will tell you no, but it is absolutely the best way to introduce yourself to the series even if some features are gone. this is one of the most beginner-friendly sim/strat games ive played, not because its overly simple, but because the tutorial and tooltips are well-done enough to guide you into the basics.the game is so dense that you wouldn't even notice the missing CK2 stuff unless you knew about it.

God, I miss the immortal trait.

>literally cannot legally spend money to purchase this video gameguess I'll pirate it then LMAO

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>>523621939

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>>523620052>>523620438

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love the steam reviews for this game

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>>523620823 But the carthage problem was solved for good, right right? This is how you solve problems.

>>523618076It fucks with the ecosystem of the soil and kills plants. There's also a ritualistic motive for it though.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salting_the_earth

>>523618076"Why I season my fields, not my salad"

>>523621939you can buy it on key sites or use microsoft gamepass if you really want to give someone money

>>523618487CK3 is fantastic for beginners compared to its other grand strategy siblings because its mechanics and gameplay are now actually explained quite well in the tutorial and tooltips. It's also so content packed for a Paradox launch (easily the most ever for a Paradox title launch) that you wouldn't notice anything missing from CK2 unless you were really familiarized with it. Bar none CK3 is the best grand strategy to not only approach for beginners, its future is extremely promising with how much content it already has and how well it plays out.

>>523618784cs.rin.ru has a copy pasted copy of CK2 that works fine.

>>523623203I think the same. The potential of CK3 is insane. Every core mechanics of CK3 is superior to the same core mechanics in CK2.

>>523620827based

>>523618076prevents the ground from sticking

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Can someone please explain what the fuck this means.At some point when this character was my heir they and their own heir randomly both got the disfigured trait. I thought it was from battle or a disease or something.Then when I took over it says the highlighted part, it is me "allegedly".The weird part is all my siblings are half siblings even though I remember this guy had the same mother as the rest of my kids, but she isn't listed in the parents. Did my heir get fucking assassinated and replaced and now I'm playing as the imposter?

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>>523627949Maybe the game is wonky beause you're cheating your ass of.

>>523618505i just got it on GMG through a proxy, no biggie

>>523627949maybe a man in the iron mask reference

Is it just me or is the AI worthless to decide how strong you are, resulting to lots of wars that they could never win against you like early EU4?

>>523630583yeah pretty much, you can also get free alliances from marrying off your kids as soon as you get war declared on you and then triple your military might

>>523617314What's the appeal of NTR?

>>523630723sometimes an MC deserves to helplessly watch as his women are fucked in front of him

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>>523617314nah fuck you vassalwhy don't you get out of that peon stuff and we'll settle it right here in court? what do you say?

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>>523622236Is Paradox buying positive reviews again?

Is there a way to pay a ransom for a prisoner of your own dynasty? My wife is prisoner from a person im not even at war with and I have no clue how to get her back.

>>523627949It' le funny joke, nothing more.

>>523623203>CK3 is mechanically better>CK2 has shit tons of more flavor and soulsI'm torn

why can't I just let the AI move my armies dammit

>>523620052>>523620438>>523622097Never happened. It is never really described in ancient sources, only as razed. Even the very detailed Macrobius does not tell of it. First iteration of the salting of Carthage comes from the 1930's historian B. Hallward and from there on it spread rapidly with no basis really.

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>>523632109CK2 is a lot better if you're a coomer.

>>523622354That was only until the based Vandals crossed over in to Africa and took over rebuilt. Afterwards they did what Hannibal could't do and sacked Rome aswell as taking controll over the mediterrenian

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>>523632412nobody cares, nerd

>>523617314

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>>523618076It makes the soil salty.

>>523627949i think it has to do with one of your traits, might be the disfigured one which you seem to have (if i remember correctly it's the one with the white mask)

>>523627949It's just a joke description, referencing that since you wear a mask they can't see if you are who you say you are. There are several other joke descriptions as well, for example if you get depression it says "This is you, though you don't feel like yourself"

>>523632628It is sad when myth and falsehood takes precedence over reality and exciting historical knowledge.

>>523618505I got my steam key from gamesplanet.You have to use paypal though.

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>>523620052>>523620438Lmao Carthage fags still seething, don't you guys have a baby sacrifice to get to?

tribal + dynasty head + head of faith combined into the same character is ridiculous. use the early-game advantage to replace the world into your dynasty and religion. you can start as an OPM and be invincible by 950 without even trying.heck, your vassals will be conquering the world for you with their free CBs on everyone combined with the tribal early-game advantage that makes them win every war they get into.you can even release them as independent for the renown bonus and still call them into wars as dynasty head

>>523617314>LleigyWhat kinda fake language is this?

>>523620052>>523620823Let this be a warning for the USA. Two super powers cannot coexist. If the USA ignores China for too long, guess who is going to salt the fields of north amerca?

>>523626250I see you are a fatfu/ck/ of taste.

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>>523620526I have ‘t noticed any jews yet, besides the WE WUZ down in East Africa

>>523633273With nukes everyone gets salted.

>>523618076Kills slugs on it

>playing any paradox game at launchbaka desu senpai, wait until there are 20 DLCs for it to become playable.

>>5236182919/10underrated

>>523617314I haven't played this game but I've seen the memes. Is it possible to NOT get cucked?

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>>523635118stay a virgin

how the frick do i git gud at this game?do you need to be autist level 1000 to compete?

>>523635380Your son has good taste.

>>523635632Most important thing is to understand how inheritance works.

>>523635380The tag-team event gets you the generous trait.

>>523626250SOILNICE AND SALTED

>>523636005>tag-team eventHOW

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>>523633019Fuck off John Green.

is it possible to not get fucked up the ass as Ireland in 867?

>>523635928i will go forth and understand, thanks user

>>523620526create your own religion that allows for anti jew crusades, make all money related traits sinsnot as braindead simple as in ck2 where it was only 1 click, now you can enjoy capturing the and torturing them

>game says my son is a cuck baby>he only has congenital traits from me and the mother>alleged father has no congenital traitswhy

I have over 20k soldiers. How the fuck do I raise only a couple of those? Do I seriously have to disband after raising everybody?

>>523621870you can enable it by editing a save game, it turns you into a bady though... which is weird

>>523618683Streamlined is just newspeak for watered down casual garbage made easy for brainlets.

>>523636502In short, avoid gavelkind like the plague.

>>523636579It's all nurture! We're all human!

>>523636005The devs are clearly worse degenerates than people who keep browsing Holla Forums.

What's the difference between the three gavelkind inheritance systems? The descriptions suck ass.

>>523618643There's so much shit missing from CK2 that it makes everything so frustrating. That's on top of the general broken Paradox release shit. No fucking ledger, follow army, message settings, mapmodes...It turns out that half the people in the game are bastards because either everyone cheats all the time or the event to retroactively make someone a bastard fires way too often.Literally every war starts with the enemy loading everyone on a boat and sailing to your capital because after the wargoal it's the most efficient warscore.Bordergore is out the wazoo. The entire coast from Finland to Mallorca becomes a patchwork of tribal county invasions and the steppes look like Jackson Pollock's paintings.All the release reviews and first impressions told me that Paradox released a complete game for a change. What they should've said was that the Paradox-shit-release-factor was only set to 33% this time.The new mechanics like stress are cool but they don't outweigh the frustration. The novelty has worn off and CK2 is just a better game at this point. I'm thinking about not playing the game for a few big patches. YHWH knows how long that will take. EU4's debt spiral took 3 months to fix.

>>523636759The first one is trash, middle one is gavelkind from CK2 and the third one is easy to manage

>>523627949"noone wanted to know who I was until I put the mask on"

>>523636828>the third one is easy to managePls say how.

>>523631623right click on the character thats holding them and ask them to be released or plot to breat them out of jail by right clicking on the character you want to rescue

>>523636950If you only have one of your highest rank title (1 kingdom, etc) they're all fine since your brothers will become vassals of you rather than independent but the third one lets you keep more than one county on succession

>>523632109wait for the inevitable 40 dlc packs and MODS

>>523637050actually I'm a bit wrong, if you have a shitload of duchies the first partition one might make a kingdom title for one of your other kids which will result in them becoming independent, that's why the first one is shit

>>523636496sure, ally france and take over the smaller counties then wales then scotland etc

>>523636774>No fucking ledgerLiterally nobody gave a shit about the ledger. Except you, apparently, because you're looking for things to get mad at.>follow armyNot important>message settingsNot important>mapmodesThere are more than enough, nobody should give a shit about any other than realms>BordergoreIt was just as bad or worse in 2

>>523636502for easymode, start as a viking. tribals are very OP in the early game. unlike feudals, who don't have enough money to do much of anything until they get more developed in the 1060s+.my advice, start as this guy. he's young, starts with 1000 prestige, and doesn't have anyone strong around who cares about him.immediately, before even unpausing, grab ~3 men-at-arms (I recommend archers since most characters get light infantry early and archers counter those hard), declare war on telemark, and raise your army then march straight into their capital. you will always win this fight 100% and annex them. then immediately attack nedenes and take one province from them (you can't declare for more yet since you don't have enough prestige or whatever)then take your army down to england and raid the Bishopric of Cantebury: It has an OP special building that gives it huge income which means you raid it for 50g+then either peace out of there before their army can come stomp you, or if you wanna risk it head over to east anglia to raid them. their army shouldn't be able to beat yours, but they always get attacked right away and sometimes annexed which turns the guy who annexed them hostile to you which makes them defeat your army and take all your loot.you may need 2-3 restarts to pull this off, but it only takes like 5 minutes. or you could play it safe and just afk in your capital and wait for an opportunity to attack.at any rate, by the time you come back from the raid or have waited a while, attack either vastergotland, varmland, or opplond; they should be busy fighting and raiding each other so at least one of them should be easy to conquer, maybe even all of them.then start eating up the rest of norway. they're all super weak and nobody cares that you eat them. only opplond is ever any kind of threat.and then just attack whoever you can whenever they seem weak. eventually you'll be big enough to take denmark/sweden in a kingdom war, then snowball

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What are the best coomer mods for CK2?

>>523636005

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>>523636579IIRC CK2 cuck events fire even if your child is yours if your char has 'paranoid'. Maybe 3 goes into that too.

>>523636596If you raise them the will reinforce to their max in the time of a month.You can interrupt that process by telling them to move by using CTRL+ clicking on an adjacent space.

>>523637542snowballing on first ruler is the easier part of CK games.

>Be comfy Iceland>Start taking nearby isles with ease>Amass 500 soldiers which isn't much but everyone else nearby only has 200>Feels good so far>Norway sends 2000 men and eats half my land because they feel like it>Can do literally nothing about this>The best option is surrender immediately to cut losses>Half my mainland is ugly purple and I'm never getting it backThis game fucking sucks.

>>523637278>follow army>Not importantSure helps that my 9000 man strong allies have come to help me fight this war. Too bad they're all in 900 man lots and don't do a single fucking thing against a 5000 stack.

>>523638086Heard of alliances?

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The fact that the glorious Aryan nordics are "tribal" tells me all I need to know about this pozzed shitty game. My ancestors were the most developed race at the time unlike the lesser whites of Europe.

>>523638086That’s what mercenaries are for

>first ruler lives for 6 years>next one for 8>playing as 4 year old hideous child>max diplomacy >land myself brilliant wife>seduce her>get tons of bright/brilliant children >befriend every king in Europe >marry into three biggest kingdoms>hold only two castles in Czech with barely any vassals and only 2k soldiers >none wants to touch me because I have 8k or so from allies and +100 relationship with all important people

>>523626250Hah

>>523638034yeah but it's even easier in CK3 since you make sure to start as dynasty head so you can disinherit everyone except your heir so all that shit like gravelkind may as well not even existjust don't fall into the concubine trap of producing more heirs than you can afford to disinherit.making bastards is way better, since you pay for those in piety instead of renown

>>523617314This game is fucking dogshit and you memed me into buying itits fucking all about getting dumb shitty territory just so you can get more territory there is no fucking gameplay to it just dumbass menus I don't give a shit about all the fucking gay r3ddit gold moment generator bullshit its barely a fucking game

>give my sister the crown of England in a crusader war>she usurped my position as dynasty head right before getting to select a heritage trait>she chose a shitty oneFor fucks sake

>>523638086Historically accurate 2bhfam

>>523618076you plant potatoes there, then harvest french fries

>>523638370What heritage trait you'd say are best, higher chance of good traits?

>>523618487yes, it's bare bones to the max

>>523636434>acting like a tranny and blm supporterDil8 you kiddie rumperpumper

>>523638478That's the line I planned on filling, yeah.

>>523638152>alliances?Will never make it in time and even if they did there's no way they'll have enough men>>523638180>mercenariesIf I had enough gold sure, but I barely have enough to afford 300 mercs let alone 2000

>>523636005>tag-team eventAlright that's it I'm pirating this game

>>523633273You say that as if USA getting glassed is bad

>>523635118Seduce your wife

>>523638613Not true, leave your army on boats, let them conquer your shit. Call in allies and wait for them to wipe the floor with them. The problem is that you need the kids for it and sometimes it just doesnt go your way.

Are you able to sell out your own troops as mercs to make some gold?

>>523639010I wouldn't be surprised if some broken mechanic allowed you to do that

>>523638478GIANT, SEE YOUR 10 FEET TALL CHAD CLIP THROUGH THE PORTRAIT AND MAIN MENU

>>523639067it's a mechanic in EU4 and I don't think you can do it in CK3 but seems like something that will be added in a DLC at some point

>>523639010you can technically do that by founding a holy order and ask them for gold

>>523639146It's also a mechanic in CK2, and it's a great way of getting your sons out of the goddamn castle to learn some shit while getting paid.

>>523639130>Giant family>Giant Champions>Giant swordsThe true giga chad bloodline

So I played the tutorial, got rekt by France shortly after. Started a new game as a tribal. But I don't know wtf to do. I know there's not like a win state but the guy I picked (Ulster) is good at learning and I don't know how to play that. What are some ways to play this game that aren't mindlessly conquering and murdering?

>buy game cuz of all the shilling>it has no gameplay at all, its just menus and text boxes, no fucking goal the usual "we couldn't think of anything make ur own fun XDDDD">the only "fun" you can get out of it is r3ddit stories to farm gold about "myfamily inbred they looks scally my friend cuck me omg engladn dead haha chungus"Fuck this "game" and fuck everyone who told me to buy it

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>>523639710if you want ez mode tribal pick someone in Scandinavia, on the early start Ireland gets constantly attacked by vikings

I've united Ireland. Now what? Do I keep going west or start a new game somewhere else?

>>523639909Unite Britannia? Create a race of giant amazonian warriors? Abduct an emperor and force him to convert to your religion then watch his empire implode over the course of 10 years?

>>523639909Have you reached a second generation yet? That might un-unite the Kingdom temporarily.In CK2 I had fun Yojimboing Scotland and England.

>>523640148>convert to adamitism>abduct foreign rulers and force them to be naked toothis is the way to do it

>Have son with gigantism>He starts banging his sister.>I invite them both to my chambers for a 3-way>We all give each other syphilis>I die a few weeks later from syphilisWorth it.

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What's the best way to make your military better as a tribal?

>>523640835mega jacked knights and archers for men at arms since everyone else is probably using skirmishers

>>523638354>I don't give a shit about all the fucking gay r3ddit gold moment generator bullshitThat's the only reason to play it, if you don't like that shit you shouldn't have gotten it.

>>523640937Should I construct buildings or anything like that?

My guy kept getting the bad outcome I'm every choice, how do you die from 30% hunting death chance

>>523638086Swear fealty and expand under Norwegian protection. later break free or usurp the throne yourself.

>>523639718>buyingThat was your first mistake.

>>523639718So you brought a game while doing absolutely no research to know if you'd like it?You deserve your salt.

>>523617314Now, seduce your former wife, and cuckold him. Seduce his actual wife too, and cuckold him some more. He's smug now, but before the end just keep admitting the secrets that all his children are actually yours and break the swedish bastard.

>>523639718you have to spread ur dynasty retard

I feel games like Fire Emblem do the grand strategy shit better than the actual grand strategy games.Oh look, Silas didn't gain speed on chapter 6. This is ging to bite me in the ass when he gets doubled in chapter 25.Oh look, I lost 75 prestige. Who cares, I lose it all when my ruler dies anyway.

Just noticed muslims don't have grape points anymore.

>>523618262>fuck around with your religionFuck around too much if you ask me. My pope led a crusade for jerusalem and not only did we lose, but somehow the muslims got rome, and de-popeified him so now we have no head of catholicism and rome belongs to a dude in a turban.

>>523627949TELL ME ABOUT KING LLYWELYN AP CADWGAN, WHY DOES HE WEAR THE MASK?

>>523640973build whatever you can, don't tribes only have 4 buildings and 4 slots per chiefdom?

>>523620823That was on purpose. The romans have a tendency to make all their wars "defensive" wars. They can never be the aggressor, so they always search for some imagine slight or reason to justify attacking these people who clearly can't defeat them.

>>523639718>buy game>paradoxDo you see where you went wrong?

>>523617314Can I wage war with every country until I own all of them?

>6 years to convert provinceDoes the progress reset if I make him fabricate a claim for a bit?

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>>523642130No, it keeps progress.

>>523642179Neat.

>>523623046> if you really want to give someone money> microsoftGo fuck yourself shill

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>>523618076wastes salt

>play as a pacifist in muslim spain, just chilling>dad is the Ruler but hates me for some reason, decides to annex my province>uh okay>annexes another one>okay>demands another one>let it go, seduce and fuck his married daughter as revenge>her husband threatens me with blackmail by telling everyone he's a cuck>let him do it, dad throws me in jail after a very brief warWhat the fuck I'm your only heir man you should have my back

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Is revoking every title and ignoring the domain limit a viable strategy?It seems to only penalise vassal levies/taxes, not the ones you own directly.

>>523632739If you have the arrogant trait it says "This is you, and you are MAGNIFICENT!"

>>523618076>>523620526

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>tribal>prestige matters above all else>feudal>prestige means nothing at allCool, what exactly am I supposed to do with my 4k prestige?

>>523642859Is he paranoid? Maybe he's afraid you fucked your mom? it's been happening a lot in ckIII

>>523630723I have a high ego and I love imagining being so superior to someone that their gf/wife will fuck me

>>523643098Wage war, disinherit sons and not much else.

>>523643098Fabricate titles, mostly. Wanna be king of a previously unclaimed country? Gotta tell everyone why you deserve two crowns.

>Vassals won't stop blobbing and making bordergoreSTOP RUINING MY NEAT AND TIDY LITTLE KINGDOM

>>523641675turn based games > pseudo-realtime map paintersHonestly, real turn based games achieve depth Paradox shit can only dream about, but Paradox shit gets to have memes, graphics and it's easy to get into for brainlets, so there is that.

>>523637278Not that user but you are a retard. Play the game

>>523640937>game warns me one of my counties will leave the kingdom on the death of its ruler>check county>the heir is the leader of some mercenary company that has no family to speak ofwhat the fuck? how did this happen?

>>523620424Sounds pretty based, I'd be proud of him

How do you choose a lord to play?I know very little about medieval history and I'm overwhelmed by all the options

So I take it custom rulers are going to be DLC... AGAIN

>>523645363Free DLC, but DLC, yeah.

>>523645072Always start with Ireland AKA tutorial island.

>>523622571based instant ramen connoisseur.

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>>523618076Ruins the land to prevent people from growing crops there, it's meant to be done as a way to make sure no one can live there. Usually a very spiteful and short sighted tactic since you lose out on potential land you could conquer and grow crops on yourself.

>>523645363Why fix something that aint broken? Their fucking DLC policy of releasing an unfinished game and sell the remaining content as DLC for ludicrous prices while at the same time steal mods and sell it - that is.

So my character finished a tree in the diplomacy lifestyle. If i move to Martial will i keep all the perks from the Diplomacy perk tree?

>>523617314Oh yeah? Well fuck you leatherman

>>523645798based cringe chad cuck.

>>523645937Why not just save the game and try it?

>>523646342I only play Ironman.

>>523617314>can rp as tyrant and cosplay legalism

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>>523645363Who cares? You have to be a 60 year old demented cripple to create someone worthwhile.

I quickly got to a point where I didn't know what I was doing, I unified my country but by this point other countries are all unified as well and even if I don't somehow have a vastly inferior army to them, they get a massive bonus purely because I instigated the war.

>>523618076

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I dunno where to play. I think I'd rather play a Count or a Tribal and work my way up, but it seems like the small independents like that only exist to be crushed by the tardblobs in each various location.

>>523617314oh nononono

>>523644367>unironically thinks fire emblem is deeper than GSG games Lmao fucking weebs

>>523618487yesi've tried many times to play ck2 and i couldnt get it to click.i played the tutorial on ck3 and everything just made sense. i've been playing ti nonstop this week

>>523617314>that shiteating grinCK3 is so good, im surprised by paradox

>>523617314The amount of manliness is determined in how much men you are willing to sacrifice in order to avoid being called a cuck.

>>523618076seasons the vegetables while they grow

>>523639718Wait for big anime tiddy mods lol

>>523633273Americans do it to themselves with fracking

>>523618487Yes, it's a million times better, even though it still has a ton of bugs from having just been released. CK2 is really not very good.

>drawn into holy worse against Swedish pagans in England >half their armies are black muslimsEh, Paradox?

>>523644254Get absolute crown authority

How do I get back my titles after my stupid family steals them on rulers death?

>>523618076The salt in the vegetables will make the people's lips itchy and crack.

>>523650232Declare war on them or start murdering since you're probably 2nd or 3rd on line for them

>>523633019History is just one man's opinion on primary sources

>>523617314>have a successful dynasty >100 years later there's like 40 different cadet houses because everyone thinks they're importantHope they fix this.

>>523650363Don't forget high blood pressure.

>>523652068There's a lot to fix>small ally army avoids bigger enemy one>if it joins my army we will be big enough to defeat it>no way to force it

>>523647682I am talking games like Shadow Empire and Deity Empires brainlet, but yeah even old Fire Emblem on the GBA makes you rack your brain more than all GSG.

How do you manage civil unrest in a larger kingdom? I have all of Ireland, and peasant revolts keep popping up.

>>523618076We can't expect God to do all the work.

>having a jolly time consolidating Spain as Leon>managed to seduce Emma Capet, she's my soulmate>give me a good son>give me fuck tons of sons, damn woman cant stop loving my dick>disinherit all of them except one>die>play as the 8 year old chad that will unite western Europe>liberty faction instantly fires>6k troops against my 2k>alt f4great game

>>523652997Kill them all.

Bros can I be Arabs in this and conqueror the world?

>>523623203I'm hoping they develop good Republican government mechanics if they decide to reintroduce playable Merchant Rep. Mainly so that making a hellenistic-era overhaul mod with playable Republics & Monarchies will be entirely plausible.

I like historical games because they get me interested in History and I spend a few months lost in reading. how were crusaders viewed after the crusades? Were they venerated/viewed in awe back home, or did they generally not go home?also, where were most crusaders from?

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>>523618076>he doesn't brine his crops so they grow up nice and JOOCY

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>>523647645Be a viking. Raid, upgrade buildings and conquer all the idiots around you. You will very very quickly have one of the strongest armies in the world

>>523617314Does CK3 have a custom character start option or is it some future bullshit DLC??

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>>523654283not right now, they've announced it as free dlc later on though I think

>>523654283Free update in the future, supposedly soon.

>>523654283Future bullshit DLC

>>523642859>Playing as a mudslimeYou deserved it.

diplomacy > military > stewardship > shit > intrigue

>>523653921>how were crusaders viewed after the crusades?I mean, depends on the Crusade, but after the First they were probably considered in much higher esteem than they were beforehand, especially by the clergy. Its not really as if nobility had opinions of people who're now all the way across the Mediterranean>Were they venerated/viewed in awe back home, or did they generally not go home?Most, if not all of them, did not go home>also, where were most crusaders from?France, and the Normans in Italy, for the most part

>>523654072I don't play as Sn*wniggers.

>>523654559Intrigue is great for murdering and cucking everyone.

>>523654559Intrigue is broken, what are you talking about?You can just abduct people to instantly win wars.

>>523654776>fighting wars at all

>>523654072No, you'll instantly get raided by your 20 retarded brother kings or dragged into infinite england wars

>>523651508brainlet take.

>>523652274Salt doesn't cause high blood pressure, at least not chronically.There's only one study saying it does and its methods are dogshit, but everyone believes it because they don't want to acknowledge that they're fat and don't exercise.

>>523654879>raidedI never get raided by the AI for some reason.>infinite England warI gave my retarded son all the land over there and let him deal with it. Was no longer my problem.

Conquering Ireland is supposed to be hard, right?

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>>523655330no

>>523655330its the easiest shit in the game to do.

>>5236553301066 start? No

>>523640520ok thats it im getting me this

>>523655330got it on my third try, went two generations with the Kingdom before it fucking erupted in civil war.having more fun in Iberia desu

>declare war on landlocked seljuks>their entire army shows up for a naval invasion of constantinopleFuck this gay ass magic boat shit. I'm done playing the game until they fix it.

Deus Vult is actually in the game. Did they backpedal or was it a ruse?

>>523627949Man in the Iron Mask movie.They replace King Louis with his twin brother, who was locked in prison, wearing an iron mask, and nobody knows about it.

>>523655748It's what happens when you don't ignore gaming journalism.

>Try my first proper run after learning the game in the shitty 'tutorial'>this happens not even 5 days after I unpausespicy

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>>523617314the important question firstcan you do this to other people in the game?

>>523641858Reminds me of a certain modern superpower that has been in "defensive" wars since its inception.

>>523655209>There's only one study saying it does and its methods are dogshitStop reading "just eat what you want lmao" burger broscience.pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12444537/>Two recent meta-analyses of randomised salt reduction trials have concluded that there is little purpose in reducing salt intake in the general population. However, the authors, as with other previous meta-analyses, included trials of very short duration (eg 1 week or less) and trials of acute salt loading followed by abrupt reductions to very low salt intake (eg from 20 to less than 1 g of salt/day). These acute salt loading and salt depletion experiments are known to increase sympathetic tone, and with salt depletion cause a rise in renin release and, thereby, plasma angiotensin II.>These trials are not appropriate, therefore, for helping to inform public health policy>A reduction of 100 mmol/day (6 g of salt) in salt intake predicted a fall in blood pressure of 7.11/3.88 mmHg (P

Cant wait for models mods desu

>>523655330Lel no. I just started as Iceland and conquered half of Ireland already because why not

How do I install mods in the pirated version?

How good is this game for someone who never played ck2? I just wanna create a harem and die

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>>523656475 buy the game then go to the workshop

>>523638086Mate, I did fine as Iceland. Just hoard money until Vestisland can supply with with 2k troops and then you're golden. Don't forget Men-at-arms.Just reformed the Astaru faith. Feelsgoodman.

Download them from paradox's mod page or from steam workshop using the downloader page, then make a mod folder in the CK3 folder in Documents. You then extract the mod zip in a folder to make it look like pic related. You have to make the .mod files too. Paste this in the .modversion="2.3.0"tags={ "Historical" "Map" "Balance"}name="MOD NAME"supported_version="1.0.3"path="C:/Users/YOURNAME/Documents/Paradox Interactive/Crusader Kings III/mod/MODFOLDERNAME"

>>523657093Fuck wrong pic.

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Does this game have a ledger?

>>523657093>>523657207meant for>>523656475

How the fuck do I into mod makingI want to make a mod that'll fucking deal with 867 Viking's fetish for coastal county conquest

>>523654559seduction is fun but it's fucking wild, you literally just fuck everything.

>>523657586>Butthurt continental can't handle superior nordic warriors

>intercept part of enemy army, forcing enemy stack to arrive much later to the fight giving us chance to win >my allies FUCKING STANDING FUCKING RIGHT NEXT TO ME NOT JOINING THE WINNING FIGHTFUCK YOU PARAKEKS, FUX YOUR RETARDED AI

>>523618076I know the Bible mentions "salting the earth" or some shit. Never knew what it actually meant, also salt is mentioned a lot in the Bible. I know salt was considered like a purifier of evil.

So when are the anime tiddies mods coming?

>>523657586Sounds like it's be a simple mod, just one modifier on the coast conquest CB would probably do it.

>>523654283There's been a custom ruler mod out for days.

What's up with the constant fucking independence wars in HRE? Makes a slow count HRE game unplayable. Fuck this game

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>start new game as duke of bohemia>become a leper less than a week after start

>>523659518Here's your HRE bro

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Why are neutral armies allowed to siege my vassals without me being able to do anything about it?

Newfag here, just finished tutorial.Is it normal to just let time run?Feels like when I'm not at war that I'm being idle and should do something but I don't know what. Also, is a diplomatic/intrigue playstyle viable? With kissing asses and being a backstabbing cunt.

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Why the hell neutral to me armies can attack me if we're fighting common enemy, fucking retarded

>>523658914Eh, I dont know if I'd want to modify the CB itself, moreso modify the AI's behavior into using it less, and make it prioritize raiding over coastal conquering

>>523644254ThisI just want finland but before you know it I have half of england and spain

>>523645806>Ruins the land to prevent people from growing crops thereNot entirely, if it was a recent salting, something like taking a couple wagons full of salt water and draining it out on the field it'd only effect the top soil, all you need do is till the whole field and remove that top layer of soil and then then plow the field again. A very arduous task to be sure but not unrecoverable.I understand where the confusion comes from though, salt flats are completely infertile no amount of tilling, fertilizing or plowing is going to make anything grow on them, that's because they used to serve as an ocean bed millions of years ago but due to geographical changes it dried out leaving behind land completely permeated by salt.

>>523660826

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>>523644254Bro it's historical. Everybody knows of the english count turdburglar of twatvalley who owned several fiefs in finland as well as corsica for example

>>523658737Salt had a lot of historical importance due to being one of the first tools man used to try to keep his meats eatable for a while longer.

I have no idea what I'm doing.. somehow I can make the title for Kingdom of Ireland now and for two other dutchys but not really sure how I did it. How do you steal titles from people.. murder them or scheme to go to war and appoint relatives?

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madlad coming through

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>>523655841>movieBruh

Anyone else get these nuclear blobouts near end game?

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>>523661452Jesus fucking christ. Waiting for modders to fix this shit.

>>523661452>>523661554Same, I really want to play, but maps like these scare me away.

>>523662025CK3+ is already in development, i'm pretty sure they will do their best to kill blobs.

>>523661452The Seljuks will conquer the entire map if you let them live long enough or let the game run long enough. It is inevitable. Empire titles + Muslim fervor is just too stable, while Catholicism collapses almost immediately and Europe tears itself apart from within.I let a game run past the end date on observe to around 1800 and they owned 95% of the map, had some 30,000 living relatives, and around 250,000 levies.

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>>523662336>had some 30,000 living relativesTop fucking kek

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>>523662336>be 13k in debt>conquer everything anyway

>>523662595Money literally means nothing to the AI.

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>>523662737Money is only power if you partake in using it as currency for trades.

Lads my levies are not regenerating and I do not know why. I am an empire and have like 20k.

>>523662865low control maybe?

>>523626250RIGHTOLIVE OIL IN

Nah, nearly everything at 100%.

>>523617314THE FOUL FIEND

>>523663294for>>523662979

>grant a loyal vassal a duchy>they gain 60 opinion>they lose 100 opinion because suddenly they want five fucking moreWHY?

The combat is such fucking garbage, the movement is fucking janky.

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>>523645798>white wineholy fucking kekliterally redpilled

>>523663425Give a sissy the tip and they'll want the whole thing

>>523663425>king dies>apparently willed it that his kingdom be split up evenly among his nine kids>your new character owns less than they did at the start of the game

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Is there a way to check someone's actual parentage when someone is accused of being fathered by someone else?

>>523663813>start in tutorial island>create ireland>create emprie of alba>old ruler that everyone loves dies>new ruler is a 0 year old baby>everyone hates the little faggot>faction takes me off the alban throne and im back to ireland>then irish faction takes me off the irish throne and im back to duke of munsterWell fuck them, it took 3 generations but I'm back as emperor.

>>523662865Do you have any levies risen? I've noticed that my army doesn't replenish if anything is risen

>>523617314I did this all the time in CK2 as a Russian reformed pagan.

>>523627949This place is too low IQ to get this reference.

>>523658737Salted soil is incapable of growing and sustaining crops. It essentially kills soil fertility. A lot of uneducated kids itt, damn.

>>523664656Yeah it was a glitch, I raised my armies and disbanded them and its all good now, thanks

Does it have canibalism?Andif so, can I eat the (ex) royal family of nations I conquer?

>>523664267>ambitious vassals depose infant ruler become king insteadSounds about right

>enjoy watching crusader kings videos>gave ck2 a try when it turned f2p>no idea what tf was going on>fast forward to ck3>play with gamepass and complete tutorial>still no idea what is going onI'll stick to videos.

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>>523665989I'm in the same exact situation.

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>>523617314I'll admit that's funny. You know what to do though right? Kill his entire family.

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>>523661452>they still haven't fixed that thing where empires like the Byzantines conquer massive swathes of nomad land in Asiaffs

>>523617314Havent really looked into this yet, what features it has vs is missing compared to ck2? Worth to buy yet?

>Be me>Queen keeps giving me sons>Sweet, an heir and a spare>Wait, what do you mean I have no daughters to marry off for alliances

>>523666763turn your sons into sissy faggots and sell their bussy

>>523659883Diplomacy is possible and very long con. My current rulers sister is ruling East Frankish blob while my daughter and heir is wife of West Frankish blob. All from very small Duchy in middle Europe

>>523666745doesn't have republics, artifacts, no nomad specific government, no societies

>>523666636The Byzantines seem go across the Mediterranean into Africa and conquer all of Africa now instead, at least in all my games they do.The Muslims conquer all of the nomad lands in Asia now.The Byzantines and their Muslim neighbors seem to ignore each other and not fight.

Its nice to have the EU as allies to cuck the British. t. Irish.

>>523666930Is there something it has that 2 doesnt?

how does this game compare to Stellaris? Similar shit with a different theme?

>>523617314So is revoking all titles once you take over an area then generating a batch of random fucks that love you and making them all nearly powerless one holdings shits still the best way to go stability wise?

>>523666763Decapitate her and get a new wife, if new wife gives birth to a son repeat until you get a daughter.

can vassals just force their way into your council now? this bitch keeps on getting in despite having shit stats, i already had a full council, the dude was automatically fired and the bitch was brought in, like what the fuck, i didn't blackmail her ass to stop a civil war for nothing

>>523667156tits

>>523667328Check their vassal contract and see if they have a guaranteed counsel spot.

>>5236671563D portraits are a pretty nice addition.

>>523667434>>523667634Yep, its cooming time.

>>523667458ah fuck, i forgot about that, fuck it i was planning on killing the bitch any way

>>523667156there are skill trees associated with each lifestyle

Wait is religious conversion on a timer now like EU4 and not a % chance?

Just like real life

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>>523667914Pretty much everything is now.

>>523665278The soil will eventually heal but it takes a long time and a lot of water

>Die>1 month later my wonderful Son dies from a light wound and my court doctor fucked off somewhere and nobody told me>dipshit grandson is now king>The convert culture task that I started two years ago now completes and the people of Dublin are 100% Castilian because the king who's been in charge for 1 week is Castilian nowI'm an idiot but why game do this to me

>>523668072Begone Thott

>>523662336>Empire titles + Muslim fervor is just too stable, while Catholicism collapses almost immediately and Europe tears itself apart from within.Whoa damn based game alert.

Is there a no cucking mod? I don't want to play Johans sexual fantasies anymore

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>>523668139I hate it.