What do you say/do?
FBI at door asking about 4Chan
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>>430213424niggers tongue my anus
Tell them their beer is on sale.
>>430213424Call them fucking faggots
I do not open door to strangers
>>430213424Just keep shouting the Nigger word at them over and over until they leave, so they have to write it in their report. If you want to get cheeky with it, spell out NIGGER in morse code with the pattern of niggers.
>>430213424present my butthole
>>430213424Are you hear about the aliens I saw?
>>430213424Are you under the assumption they're still alive at my doorstep? Be more specific.
>>430213424I open the door and invite them down into the basement for some refreshments.
why are the FBI knocking on my door in bongland?
>>430213424Tell them everything I know. Honesty is the best policy
>>430213424Call the police and theyll come and shoot the glowies
>>430213424greet them with FRONT TOWARD ENEMY
Tell them they can contact me through my lawyer.
I'd probably be asleep.
Throw snacks under the bus for my cp collection
>>430213424I tell them about how stupid they are. All organizations are stupid. Even mensa is stupid (pic rel). No fucking way im dumber than average. Im 130 IQ on a bad day. Didnt even have time to finish all the questions because of time limit... a time limit which in real life doest not apply. People living life dont tackle and solve career paths, life decisions, or work projects with rigid timelines. The one that are forced to are setup for failure.
Who's 4chan ocifer, some kind of hacker?
>>430213424Never heard of him
I ask "чeй Кpым? "?
>>430213424HOLY SHIT ITS THE SUPERNATURAL GUYS!!!!! CAN I HAVE AN AUTOGRAPH!!!!!!!
>>430213424wrong address. i am on 5chan
Hello sirs, can we go over every post? Hold on, I'll grab some coffee.
>>430213424I dont talk to police
I hope aliens are real. Im horny.
>>430213424Nothing. I don't even answer the door.
>>430214320>Dat picFalse dilemma is false
>>430214446false is falseso doublefalse?jooos, man i tell yagot to bag them
>>430213424There was literally a similar “feds gonna get you” thread like an hour ago. Are the glowniggers threatening us?
>>430213424Welcome to germany.You are now under arrest for breaking § 132 StGB. Resistance will be met with immediate and direct violence.Try not to get blood on the carpet.
>>430213424I call the police and say there are suspicious men at my door with guns
>>430213424Want to watch anime with me? :3 uwu
>>430214540They're trying to intimidate us into not using 4chan or at least not saying anything controversial. Just safe, government-approved opinions.
>>430214622With what exactly? Isn’t pepper spray illegal there? Can you even own a knife?
>>430213424>“you guys aren’t even fbi your two brothers who fight ghosts”then everyone claps and a beutiful blonde fucks me as all of my ancestors appear yavin 4 style to onlook with approval
"I appreciate the work the FBI does and I'm sure you're just doing your job the best you can, however I have been advised to never answer any questions. I am invoking my constitutional right to remain silent and have an attorney. Have a great day."Keep a business card with this statement near your front door and just read it to them. FBI are like chimps they don't like "non-compliance" or confrontation but will respect someone who has a plan in place and is polite.
>>430214778Speaking of which:Just a reminder that Israel did 9/11:m.youtube.com
>>430214830retard just dont answer your door for strangers.if they have a warrant they aren't going to knock, or they will let you know they have a warrant when they knock. if they don't have a warrant you have no business with them, and if you're under arrest there's nothing you should be saying.
>>430213424Tell them OP is a faggot and to track him down and kill him
>>430214919This and /thread
>>430214185lmao what a retard
>>430214919>>430214949TFW your wife sees the FBI business card in the door when she gets home from work.
>>430214919If anyone ever knocks on my door I quickly run up stairs to this one window that overlooks the door from a side angle, and stair at them through a crack in the blinds until they leave. I never answer the door
>>430213424I support the powerful so I will do as they say.
>>430214540Probably yes and no. Might just be guaging stress response like pic related holding a skull pondering mortality.My response to glowniggers is to remind them I hold the blackmail to their many human rights violations (psychological experimentation) ...violations to constitutional rights (4th amendment). I could send many people to prison for the rest of their lives should I press charges. ;)Did you really think the world wide cult errecting the God Emporer would have no teeth to it? My existence is a judicial reckoning.But lets keep it light hearted and positive.I am God Emperor.
Open the door a crack. Release a massive, putrid fart. Wait 5 seconds. Close door.
>>430213486Fuug I'm an alcoholic and that would drive me crazy. That being said, faggots can burn in hell I'll get something else
>>430214765>>430215143This. The fbi will never take my loli Portman
>>430214540>>430214778>>430214862its because of the outpouring of support for uncle ted.
>>430214800German self-defence laws are funny: Any non-trivial crime can be met with potentially lethal means, even illegal ones. You may even disarm a third party to gain a weapon and they aren't allowed to resist. While owning firearms comes with a lot of tests and paperwork, it's legal. Then there are a whole lot of unregulated weapons that don't qualify as firearms and aren't covered by laws. Tools like knives, or "medieval" equipment is also allowed, you just can't take weapons into the public without keeping them secured and in a non-ready state.You might have us confused with the bongs, who forbid cutlery.Also pepper spray isn't allowed to be sold for use against humans. It's perfectly fine to be sold against things like bears (bears are extinct in germany).I would also like to point out that a german recently blew up a police squad entering his home, so there is also that.
Not answer.If they want to talk they have to break the door.Even then I won't tell them shit.Rest... depends!pedo protectors aka fbi
>>430214814Sam and Dean start freaking out because "How do you know that?" And then you have to explain to them that you are an outer god who cannot interfere with anything and observes their reality for amusement, but you somehow got trapped in their dimension like how they got trapped in a Scooby Doo episode that one time. Then you tell them that if they are showing up at your door, you must be in deep shit, but you haven't encountered anything so you're rather confused.
>>430213424Tell them the truth. 99.9999% of us are just here to kill the boredom. Only a tiny handful of nutjobs actually do crazy shit like make a post on here before going on a mass shooting. They then use that to act like we're all domestic terrorists or some shit - which is bullshit.
I will inform them that milhouse is not a meme, but milhouse is not a meme is a meme
>>430213424You got a warrant?
>>430215268If you were an actual alcoholic you'd drink liquor and not beer like a faggot.
>>430215865>how would that do anything?Asking for a warrant is the Nigger to any law enforcement. Pisses them off real good.
>>430213424>"I gave your glowthread a (you) and this is how you repay me?"
>>430213424answer the door naked?
>>430216044You're not a child it won't entice them.
>>430213424>What do you sayNo hablo englaise
>>430213424Dicks. Cum. Pussy. Vagina. Slut. Bitch. Whore. Nigger. Fuck. Cunt. Ass. Dildo slathered in 8 different people's genetic code after a gangbang. Balls. I. Am. Therefore. I. Think. Begone thot.
>>430213424Lawyer user here.Don't get the door. If forced to interact, consent to nothing don't talk to them. Call my lawyer.
>>430213424You idiots! I'm working an operation for the NSA and you are about to blow it! Now get the fuck out of here before you screw things up even more!
>>430216517Fuck balls shit cum?
>>430213424do like chief keef, feds at my door jump out the window
>>430213424>>I said WHAT, WHERE??? ..."im sorry, I don't recall that, sir"
>>430215344> I would also like to point out that a german recently blew up a police squad entering his home, so there is also that.Any video?
Ask them how many times they've fapped to my nudes and demand an exact count before we proceed with any further questions If number is established, suggest they double it then get back to me
>>430214349I wonder what they were trying to signal to FBI with the X-Files. Especially when portraying good FBI. Who where they trying to reach? Hard to imagine it can be chalked to simple propoganda as at the time propoganda was not necessary as people still trusted institutions.
>>430213424"The basket weaving forum? Oh, yeah. They used to remember me I should read my SICP each days. By the way, aren't you those ghost tv show guys? Why do you let yours shows run for so long? Keep it at three seasons in most cases, is my advice. It inevitably becomes cringe in the end. Also, what the fuck is the faggot bureau is doing in my country?"
>>430213424this actually happened to me, believe it or not. they came asking about an IP address I had supposedly visited, and about online extremist discourse.i showed them a pic of my asian girlfriend I had at the time, and explained that i'm actually not a racist neo nazi or whatever.didn't hear from them again
>>430213424do you have a warrant? no, get the fuck off my property faggots.
>>430213424Get off my property fed nigger if you know what's good for you
>>430218649>subhuman beta weeb lmao
>>430218649>He can’t even get a real girlfriend
>>430213424>What do you sayYou're outside your jurisdiction, fed.
>>430218885interesting that the feds considered me more of a potential threat than you, probably because you're just on the "larping chudcel faggot" watchlist and not the actual domestic terror one>>430218987asian women are higher smv than white women on dating apps die mad over it lol
HALF OF THIS SITE IS MADE UP OF THOSE FAGGOTS THEY ALREADY KNOW TRICK QUESTION
>>430213424Call the local cops and tell them two armed shitskins are trying to break your door down.
>>430213424>What do you say/do?just start screeching and yelling out a bunch of expletive's until they remove themselves
>>430213424>What do you say/do?This is private property and you are hereby given notice of trespass. Leave now. Give them time to leave, and then force them if they refuse.
>>430213424Tits or gtfo.
>>430213424Dont you have Clinton crimes to cover up?
>>430213424>What do you say/do?I blast .308 rounds through their rat faces
fuck off without a warrant, life helmet
slip em the ip to my minecraft server
"HERE'S YOUR PENSION IN SPADES OFFICER!"
Report them for threatening that Chafewood guy
>oh I see you're here because of my 4chan history one moment>i go to the beer fridge>I remove two budlights and a shiner bock >here you go zir and xeym (I hand them the budlight as I crack my shiner) >"were here about your posts on 4 cha-">well you see the meme sneed comes from the sign. The sign itself is a subtle joke. The shop is called "Sneed's Feed & Seed", where feed and seed both end in the sound "-eed", thus rhyming with the name of the owner, Sneed. The sign says that the shop was "Formerly Chuck's", implying that the two words beginning with "F" and "S" would have ended with "-uck", rhyming with "Chuck". So, when Chuck owned the shop, it would have been called "Chuck's Fuck and Suck".
>>430213424gas the kikes race war now
>>430213424"Well? Would you?"
>>430213424>four chanFor who?I dont know any chinamen.
>>430213424I just told them the stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood..and that only a fool would take anything posted here as fact. Haven't interacted with em since.
>>430220202may god have mercy on your attention span
>>430213424>Akshully it's ebums world and you're the man now dawg>Then grab my powder wig and musket
>>430215268>>430215939Goyslop canned beer is just carbonated sparking water with 1% alcohol How can people drink it? It’s so disgusting
>>430219503>beta cope lmao. (literal) subhuman sperg confirmed
>>430218649Literally kill yourself rabbi.
>>430213424>What do you say/do?order my heavy cavalry to charge the flank
>>430222909the FBI thinks you're a larping faggot and i agree with them
>>430213424I don't know the guy
>>430213424Answer door.Tell them to fuck off.Close door.Make tea.Resume shitposting
>>430213424Say goodbye, dig a hole.
>>430213424>Autist answering the door for anyoneNice tactic you got there fbi.
>>430213424"Yes, Its true, I really do spend 10 hours per day on /n/ "
>>430213424Isn't the fbi for muricans?