20:00

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I still like RLM, and only shit on them because I find it funny

Webm or fuck off.

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Jay is a normie?

sage negated

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attributing words to undefined sources is one of the symptoms of schizophrenia you know.

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It's like he just learned that word

On 4:44 on the video Jay call's himself "normie."

mike used to go to that star trek convention before being a nerd was cool in the 2000s

That last part of the video was seriously comfy.

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I refuse to believe it can get worse than JJ's shitfests.

Fuckin' plebs kill themselves now

Yeah, it's just a agglomeration of meme spouting contrarian autists.

facebook.com/ChrisStuckmann/videos/vb.119339441437266/1044263238944877/?type=2&theater

sage negated

Stop being contrarian, autist.

Who is Chris Cuckman?

Have you seen it?

I watched it before I saw literally anything about it

I agreed with them with most things. It was definitely a lot better than the earlier ones

Jizz Cuckman is an aspiring screenplay writer.

They've really lost it.
This movie was awful, it couldn't decide what the fuck it wanted to be, a soap opera, an action blockbuster, a space mystery, it kept shifting around.
The "Sulu is gay" bit was incredibly awkward and out of place, not to mention insulting to gay people, look we had two dudes hug aren't we progressive points?
Hamfisting in references to previous star trek stories does not make up for a crappy script.

Did you pay to watch it?

Oh Boy! RLM!

Nice rare Mike.

I honestly think what happens/is happening is a combination of Mike seeing something incredibly offensively stupid, and following it up with something that's only half as bad so it doesn't upset him as much. It's like someone routinely poking you in the shoulder, and it's fucking annoying, but then every once in a while someone else comes along and punches you in the gut. The shoulder poking seems less annoying now.

That and well over a decade of Hollywood pumping out complete shit I think has Mike starting to just accept it.

Half their defense of this film was "At least it wasn't as bad as the first two." and they barely even acknowledged not liking the first one. It's obvious to me Mike just wants Star Trek back, and he's excited about anything at all that means maybe it can still exist. He said it was like watching a corpse get halfway jolted back to life.

Even while admitting the film had absolutely everything that was wrong with the first two. Big dumb action films, boring villain whose entire motivation boils down to revenge and a doomsday weapon, tons of references to the old canon these movies erased, fucking Beastie Boys in an action sequence, political pandering, shitting on the lore, a flat female alien that's supposed to be sexy (her broken english in the trailer really irritated me.)

I wondered when Mike mentioned at the beginning of the film "And there's no dog in it!" if he was referencing Porthos, but didn't want to get into it. Let me explain. In the terribly written first Star Trek, Scottie's explanation for being relegated to the ice planet that both Kirk and old Spock happened to also be exiled to (each by a completely separate party) was that he accidentally killed Admiral Archer's dog Porthos in a transporter accident. Porthos was one of the very few elements people actually liked about Enterprise. The captain had a little dog he brought with him on the ship, and Abrams just killed it off for no reason other than a weak joke that would only make sense to people it would upset. He responded to the backlash by claiming that the dog wasn't dead, and one of his intentions was to have the dog re-materialize on the bridge of the Enterprise at the climax of the third film. Here we are, and Porthos is still fucking dead.

Thanks. Call me Mr. Checked.

JJ killed Porthos? What the fuck.

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citation needed

But she is sexy.

Muslims pls go.

WEBM OR FUCK OFF CHRIS

Who fucking cares?

This is why thoughtful well articulated posts are as common as fucking unicorns around here.

But the Plinkett review was about effective it was as a product, and how JJ would direct new Star Wars better than you-know-who

Kill yourself, Saddam.

Aren't Archer and Kirk/Spock like a hundred years apart? How was nuScotty even in a position to kill Archer's dog?

Jew Jew has to show that he knows about all the Star Wa- er Trek lore, fuck if it makes sense

This is exactly like when Orci or whoever said they wanted to use the Borg for one of the NuTrek films. They said something like 'Wouldn't it be cool to show a baby Picard in a crib somewhere'. Demonstrating that they don't even know the most basic stuff about Star Trek.

He wouldn't. Archer is born around 2110. If Archer was around in Kirk's time he would be something like 130-160 years old. Even by Star Trek standards, this is stupid. Zephram Cochrane only lives hundreds of years because he was being kept alive by the cloud thingy that was in love with him.

I mean, look at the TOS characters who are still around in the TNG era:

Kirk - Kept alive by Nexus
Spock - Vulcan
McCoy - Really old
Scotty - Kept alive through suspended animation

Because he had Spock in him for a while.

it's not complicated. (I only liked Best of the Worst, personally – got me to watch Gymkata and Death Spa.)

I knew bubonic butt blasters were bad but they age faster too?

McCoy is the only one that is stupid on that list.

Even the Vulcans are pozzed by the Federation.

This is pretty much it. They're pretentious cunts now.

Just because they shrugged off a few popcorn movies?

You best believe it, user. This is honestly faux trek the movie. Pegg wrote decent dialogue and character (minus the villain, it was essentially another khan), and stuffed the film with various references to the other shows, but beyond (ba dum chee) that it was paper thin. Crew never felt in danger, red shirts die by the dozen (okay with this) and they literally surf to death by beastie boys. It did indeed channel some of the spirit of tos, but not the right parts.

Also, lemme give ya some more shit. The sulu gay thing has no bearing on the story at all, and he still has his daughter. They killed off old spock, which is fine and it had nu spock questioning his own mortality, only for that to fade because bones saved his life. The new warp effect was interesting, but stupid and not fitting.

I think the saddest bit of the movie is that chekov actually did more than the last two combined, and now he's dead.

Oh, and they literally have that "pan out to see the cast" ending. Yeah, it's shit and the jewjew flicks are much better.

Friendly reminder that RLM is pozzed and has been this whole time

What are you talking about? They do nothing but praise them. All of their HitB videos have been big dumb popcorn flicks. Would it fucking kill them to review something smaller like they did with Green Room or something?

To be fair McCoy was really, really old. Like, needed Data to hold him up old.

It still feels like you're exaggerating "praise". Even when they recommend a movie, they almost always riff and point out peculiar things, like guys shooting the shit. And they do sometimes feature other kinds of movies, but those are clearly done as a break from the movies their manchild audience will click on.

This.

Even the banter in this new one doesn't quite hit the mark. The problem is that there's no actual chemistry between the "actors".
e.g. Bones looks like he's talking with a kid instead of Kirk.

rlm shills worse than sam hyde and uncreative, unsuccessful people of 80-95 IQ are the majority of his "fanbase"

They liked it!??

wat? I hate them now! again

Fuck off back to >>>/film/ you pretentious wanker.

First off, basic psychology. It's been stated by various directors killing an animal off is the quickest way to get the audience to turn against whoever did it. The example that always comes to mind is in the director's commentary track for Secret Window the director talks about using this in the shitty Jurassic Park sequel where the t-rex gets loose in US. He said test audiences all rooted for the t-rex and hated the people for trying to catch it, until they added in a scene of the dinosaur eating a dog, then everyone wanted it back on the boat and felt relieved it was gone.

It's common in horror movies, the audience will find the monster sympathetic, unless it kills something innocent.

Porthos is a reference you'd only get if you'd watched that show. It's a scene put in just to be a dick to the people who liked that show, in a way that would annoy the even more because the timeline makes no sense. It's like someone telling you the "two hunters" joke, but specifying by name they were your mom and dad. How else could you take it but personally?

And as for the 20 lines thing, what prevents you from splitting your text into multiple posts?

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>>>Holla Forums
>>>/suicide/

Looks like financial troubles. Abrams and Pegg are on suicide watch

Already good.

wew

Rich is full pretense. Stupid fedora faggot can't take a joke aimed at him anymore without flipping his shit. Jay can't hold a critical opinion to anything anymore. Mike is too soft most of the time. I can't even say he's brutal when it counts because there's plenty of moments where he could've evened the score but didn't.

Compare this review to Inter Darkness. They still gave a shit then. In this review I barely learned anything about the movie other than they liked it. 3/5 of this video is them saying how much they liked it because they liked it and they enjoyed it and they liked how much they enjoyed it.

Overall Mike still seems like he's holding this entire channel together but he can't hold it up on his own. Rich needs to get crushed hard so he can feel the cold weighing sting of reality once more. Jay needs to snob a bit more. At least because that would piss off Mike and Mike can be brutal.

Why can't I fucking post?

Fuck… They really are plebs. Also, Beastie Boys and aliens dancing to 20th century american music? Are they that out of ideas that they have to start copying Guardians of the Galaxy?

Not to defend Pegg but it's the studio who did that, not Pegg. Pegg's the one who complained that they wanted Pleb Trek

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Its official. This is the absolute rock bottom.

This tbh fam.

He is the devil and he must be stopped.

I can't believe they liked a movie I didn't like! Unsubscribed!

Wow, you sure showed those haters by posting the same exact retort for the third time while completely failing to give good reasoning as to why their review was good. But I will say that unlike TFA they actually did point out the flaws in this film rather than saying outright that they loved it while avoiding all the flaws. But overall the main flaw in the review is saying that this film is more faithful to classic Star Trek when in fact it's just as distance from it as the last two films.

You hit the nail on the head user.

Their reviews" are barely that, it's mostly just them saying they like it because it was good, but barely go into technical details anymore. Not only that but they'll just ramble, go off on tangents that are barely related to the review for being pretentious.

Their taste in movies is also really confusing, they'll praise and gush all over the avengers movies and anything marvel, but hate DC because it's loud. They loved the new star wars as we all know, but it's literally just a remake of A new hope.

Let's not forget they had Patton Oswald in their Supercop movie.

Well put, and also thanks to for putting it so eloquently. I honestly didn't know how to put my recent feelings towards them into words.

I think this explains their recent review method quite well. I mean just compare their review of Prometheus to one of their more recent reviews. I also noted that while I'm not fond of Rich, he did at least try to put more effort into going into detail about his feelings and views GB2016 unlike Mike and Jay who mostly just sat their and pointed stuff out while not really going into detailed discussions. Basically "Hey Jay, did you see when they walked into the store?" - "I sure did Mike.".

Not going to lie. This is kind of fascinating.

You remember that scene in South Park where Chef explains that as soon as black people come up with some slang word white people use it immediately after hearing it, thus making it their own?

The people who use the term "normie" are the same type of autistic that puts ponies into everything. The same sort of faggot that says "praise kek" (incidentally, if you do something that makes you a faggot, whether or not you do it ironically is irrelevant.)

The second you wizards started saying "normie" you sealed your own fates. With all those "REEEEEEE" webms, saying "normie" in youtube comments and uploading your hi-larious memes on imgur, that was it.

Normie is from reddit. Your point is invalid. Redditors and /r9k/ faggots were memeing pepe as a caricature for people protective of pepe and memes in general - typical cuckchan cancer. This happened right around the time that a cuckchan mod asked a slut out to prom with pepe printouts glued to a posterboard. Anyone who is an actual imageboard user has always used normalfag. Normie(s) was ironically adopted by people that redditors and /r9k/ betas were making fun of (including themselves). The joke is on you, just like it was on them.

I mean, I don't know if that really counts as a meme, we kind of just put fag on the end of everything. -fag is more of a chan thing in itself. It's not like normal is the only thing that gets suffixed with fag.

That's the point. It wasn't about meme status. It was language.

I want off this planet.

I thought they were going for a long-form sarcastic review of some kind when they kept praising dumb stuff and saying dumb things about it. I got that it's less bad than the first two. Mike & Jay's retard-tier analysis is beginning to tick me off. Also, I thought Trek was one of those subjects in Rich's purview? Where the fuck was Rich Evans?

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Just remembered RLM's "review" of 2009 Trek.

I know how to use photoshop too, user.

if Avatar came out today, they would just say it was dumb but effectively manipulative, and move on

I still think he's only bring back Mr. Plinkett because people take these drunken hangout videos too seriously, more than a centenarian misogynist serial killer who really likes pizza rolls

"What did you think about Avatar, Mike?"

"I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say it was… spectacular. What about you, Jay?"

"It was very effective. The action was motivated, and it actually had a story."

But unlike you, I'm not desperate enough to use it for this.

>>>/furry/

Its not confusing at all user

It means they are on disney's payroll, but wb wont sent them the money they want

Simple as that

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this, sadly

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What did he mean by this?

>>>/rlm/

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You cucks just don't give up, do you?