Just cuck my shit up: Guy Ritchie edition

I know you're trying to say black people are animals but you're still somewhat accurate. Celebrities who adopt African children usually only do so to boost their egos. The children are invariably trotted out for photos ops and the like, it is basically virtue signalling to the extreme.

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I think for Madonna it was more of a trendy fashion symbol. But afterwards, you're stuck with a brown-skinned waste of resources that you regret ever getting. Like when Uggs were popular.

My fucking sides

top kek.

VILE! NO!
Racist! Surely, he'll grow up to be a kang.

Oh my fucking god.
I thought sex stores usually put your shit in black bags so nobody could see what you got?

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So every time he's seen in public people will think he got cucked.

Adopting blacks…top kek

Why do movies and comedians spread this meme that pussy smells like dead fish?

I just smelled my girls pussy for first time and it was totally neutral…smelled fine, kinda nice around the inner thighs actually.

I seriously thought I had to hold my breath when going down there cause of all the Hollywood propaganda ive seen

because that's what filthy kike fuckholes probably smell like

Nasty chicks got nasty pussies. It's like if you don't wash under your foreskin, you get dick cheese. For some reason, a lot of people don't realise you have to wash every single part of your body.

it's not like they use their own money to raise the thing.

you gotta eat dat bussy

Because that is what it smells like, if it gets dirty. If your girl is clean her cooch'll smell clean. One girl I dated, her pussy smelled delicious. Part of that was just how attracted to her I was though. Another, it smelled like someone's armpit, even fresh washed.

Meanwhile (do not read if you have a sensitive stomach or are eating) [spoiler]I dated a girl from Australia for two years. I've posted this story hundreds of times, it's actually how I lost my virginity. She used to be morbidly obese, lke over 300 pounds. When we met she was down to like 140. Looked good covered up, a nightmare naked. Anyway the massive weight loss fucked up her hormones. Of course, she confided in me she always smelled bad, that girls complained of how she smelled at sleepovers. Bad BO, bad breath, the works. Her pussy though, her pussy was a thing of cosmic horror. You know that story The Colour out of Space? Okay, that, but instead of a tangible color it was a solid mass wafting out of her cunt. I tried suggesting she clean it gently. "It's self-cleaning" she'd say "It'll mess up my PH balance if I use soap". One time I pretended I wanted to fool around in the shower with a bar of dial soap. She came, sure, but I just wanted her cunt to stop stinking.

So what exactly did it smell like? What was so bad I couldn't look directly at it, and even breathing through my mouth it still made my eyes water? If this description starts to sound familiar, you've read this story before.

Take a dirty old bathtub covered in grime. Okay, now take a bunch of aquariums filled with dirty water filled with the sort of fish that like to live in brown water, and dump all that in there, fish poop and multicolored rocks and all. Now go into an imaginary fridge that half works, reach into the back and dredge out two slimy, half-eaten sides of ham that have been sitting in there for two thanksgivings. Dump out a bunch of bologna that's been left out in the sun for a month in there as well. Now I want you to find a fish corpse, a big bloated one ants have started eating away on, you can see the skeleton. Take a rusty shovel, dig up the fish's corpse, and along with the dirt and the shovel, dump that in there as well. Now I want you to picture two nasty old rubbermaid trashcans FILLED with filthy pennies. Just pennies. You know the kind, they're all sticky and green and black. Just dump them right in there with everything else. Now to top it all off, I want you to imagine some nickelodeon Gak, you know the slimy stuff they sold in the 90's? Remember how gross it got after kids played with it for a while? Go down into an imaginary basement, dust off an imaginary box labeled simply GAK on the side. Tear open the top to find dozens of nasty, grimy ziploc bags filled with old Gak from the 90's. Into the mix it goes. Now put on your glove, reach in for the handle to the shovel, and mix everything up as fast as you can before your glove melts off. When your hand starts to burn drop the shovel and run to the sink.

Now I want you to go back to that tub, close your eyes and picture an axe wound, inhale deeply, stick out your tongue, and lean in for a mouthful.[/spoiler]

I practically started crying afterwards washing my hands and junk off in the sink. "What if it won't come off? What if I'm going to have to smell this forever? WHAT IF THEY ALL SMELL LIKE THIS AND I SIMPLY NEVER KNEW?!" but thankfully all experiences after that were pleasant.

Reminds me of the song Nasty Girl by Bryan Lewis Saunders.

reminds me of some shit i heard the other week while at work

i had to go behind this building to tell these girls that we were turning on the sprinklers, and they had a radio blasting music and couldn't hear me, also had their eyes shut so they couldn't see me, there was a fat one with dyed red hair (where i live it means the girl is a whore and sucks dicks for breakfast) and the first words i heard were "i need to shave my coot". seeing as how fat she was, and the other girl was somewhat less chubby than her and kinda fuckable, but still chubs nonetheless, i got this morbid picture in my head of a huge muff and imagined it probably smelled like the sewer.