I don’t think Kylo Ren is a very compelling villain. I don’t see any sense of presence...

I don't recall Vader losing a lightsaber fight to some chick.

I hope you're not referring to the prequels fam

I was talking about the original trilogy. I don't recall Vader losing a lightsaber fight to some chick there.

Do you?

More specifically, he lost to a girl who had held a lightsaber a few times during that day, but that's about it.

He was also still walking, and could have force trapped her. Movie was shit.

why did you just repeat what I said then?

apparently jedi training is only needed if you're a non-marysue, non-chosen pleb like Luke.

He's new, he's just trying to figure stuff out. And he's probably a faggot.

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Are you implying that I said you can't criticize it? I'm just saying what it seems like they're shooting for. Every other Sith I've seen depicted commands respect. Kylo very much seems like the kind of retard who hangs out with delinquents, hoping it'll give him cred.

That image of thrawn looks like a blue Patrick Bateman

Don't know the story behind OP's picture, but I'm guessing some half-assed second rate faggot "artist" stumbled across this screencap from Equilibrium and decided to queer it up.

I think I'm inclined to agree, this was intentional. Anniken was a whiny little emo bitch cunt before he became Vader. Maybe giving your anger to the dark side requires some kind of supreme emotional bitchness to be sacrificed before you can be truly a dark lord.

We call it the Mass Effect

Kylo Ren was pretty much as bad as any antagonist in a feminist webcomic.
He was made of pure straw and did nothing but embarass himself and be a laughing stock the whole movie.

This is so bad.
Shitty wtiting has just never been so blatantly shitty and agenda-pushing.
And the population is all too willing to accept it.

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I guess this means Disney aren't ever hiring Timothy Zahn to write for them after all. But perhaps that's for the best, I wouldn't want to see him forced to work within the constraints of the garbage fluff we've been handed so far by Disney.

For those who don't know him, most of the EU books that weren't mediocre or pure shit were authored by Zahn.

how did bateman turn into a smurf

no, don't let them ruin KOTOR

Anakin had reasons to though. A great warrior, who had a secret and forbidden relationship with the Queen of Naboo, giving in to anger by slaughter a whole village of Sandpeople because they killed his beloved mother. And carefully manipulated by Darth Sidious into having his allegiance with the senate instead of the jedi's. To throw fuel to the fire, given bad premonitial dreams about his wife dying, given an "option to save her", and forced into a position by the puppetmaster where he felt like he belonged to the Jedi Council but wasn't really part of the group due to the political games behind that move, which caused even more frustration until he saw no other option than to side with the senate and eventually due to his horrible deed of murdering Mace Dindu, siding with the dark side. This can be explain endlessly basically.

What's Kylo Ren's excuse? That he wasn't worthy of becoming a jedi because he was a whiny bitch, even under the tutilage of Anakin Skywalker?

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You don't get to take that with you when you die, you materialist moron.

you don't get to take anything else with you either

Vader was disciplining a child

Kylo was a child throwing a tantrum

fanboys defend him by comparing him to joffery

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He really embodies everything wrong with the movie, and why Jew Jew is a complete hack that doesn't get it.

The first 10 minutes with the raid on the village might as well have been another movie entirely considering the Kylo there and the one we get to see once he takes off the mask.

Who thought making the Vader expy a whiny manchild that loses to a nigger and androgynous cunt was a good idea? Did they never watch the OT?

Even the Prequels do it better. Darth Maul spends the whole of Episode I hounding the heroes, and can take on two experienced Jedi on his lonesome, even killing the more experienced one.

Count Dooku, again, kicks the shit out Anikin and Obi Wan when they dare challenge him, and in Episode III we see that silly fight between the Emperor and Yoda, but at least even then the Emperor is a threat, taking out a bunch of Jedi in one fell swoop and defeating their grandmaster in a duel.

What does TFA offer in terms of villains? A roided up whore in chrome armor that is utterly inept at her job, a sniveling ginger cuck that fails every step of the way (and for some reason isn't force chocked because of it) and finally, Kylo, the whiny manchild with daddy issues, that spends the whole movie fluctuating from one tantrum to the next inbetween fights where he manages to lose to a non force sensitive nigger and some dumb scavenger chick that had no formal saber training.

Meanwhile, it took Luke the better part of three movies and the tutoring of two of the most famous Jedi in the galaxy to get him to stand on even ground with Vader, and even then he had to struggle for it.

TFA is the reason I have started hating Jews with a passion.

Is this copypasta? Because if it isn't be it deserves to be. Someone ought to screencap this.

It's not copypasta, it's my general frustration with the whole of TFA.

The villains feel like they're from Home Alone, inept and goofy imbeciles meant to make audiences laugh at them. The heroes are never really threatened, which is, I guess, the whole point here. Wouldn't want to trigger the tumblrtard audience by actually putting genuine obstacles in the way of Mary Sue heroine, since all these oven dodgers really care about is "representation" and pandering to them, quality be damned.

You didn't hear about Disney's rules on how villains aren't allowed to be appealing did you? It's a company wide mandate that includes Marvel movies as well.

If you're working at Disney you aren't allowed to create cool villains. They have to be unlikable on every level, they can't be competent.

It's telling that Phasma has to be included, I think.

Even considering the Ewoks and some stuff from the prequels, I can't really think of anything that sticks out to me as "we put this in the movie so we could make toys out of it" more than Phasma. She's barely a character, let alone a villain.

I didn't hate TFA, but I'd struggle to recommend it to anyone all the same partially because of things like this and also because it's essentially a worse version of A New Hope.

it's not like they're creating appealing heroes either

Sauce?

Them being appealing aside, a villain has to be an equal, or greater, force to the hero, and he actually has to be threatening.

Disney managed to do it before. Scar and hyenas from the Lion King actually are a threat, and scary (for children). Even the hyenas, despite all their slapstick idiocy, can and do drop the act and remind the audience they are no pushovers.

Yup.

She does fuckall in the movie beyond order the nigger to take the prisoner some other place (despite the computer telling her the dindu is disloyal) and being ordered to lower the shield.

When I first saw her I thought she's likely going to be the new and "improved" Boba Fett, and likely get a whole spinoff cartoon/comic about her exploits or some shit. Other than that I have no fucking idea why she's in the movie or what she fucking does.

Hell, another instance of WTF is C3PO's red arm. Again, nothing explained about it, just more tie ins. Watching TFA felt like playing a modern game with all the DLC missing.

I hated it because Jew Jew was so smug about it, rubbing the putrid shit he made in everyone's face and gloating about how he ruined a staple of pop culture for the white goyim just because he could.

I hate it because Western civilization has been brought so low that putting a nigger, a spic (Jew) and a woman in the leading roles is now reason enough to praise a movie, regardless of abysmal writing.

He was a weird cat. Like I grew up with his kid, corwin. But holy shit Mr. Zahn was fucked in the head. Like this one time Corwin got Chrono Trigger and we were going to go to his house and pick it up so we could play it at my house(Mr. Zahn didn't like to have Corwin's friends in his house, he said they disrupted his chi.) So we are there and I had a copy of this Dark Horse Mara Jade comic in my back pack and Mr. Zahn was just sitting in the living room eat eggs out of a jar while Corwin went to his room to get the game. So I pulled the comic out of my bag and I ask Mr. Zahn if I could get an autograph and he just fucking loses it. He starts breathing really heavy and turning red, puts the jar of eggs down on the coffee table super dramatic and says
I started to say that I couldn't go because my parents were working and could drive me and he interrupts me
And on the me his voice shoot up an entire octive like a girl. I am absolutely panicking at this point, and Corwin is coming down the stairs and he looks visibly upset and tells me we need to go right this instant. On the bike ride to my house I try to ask him what I did wrong and he just tells me not to ask, then he says if I give him my comic he can get it autographed for me. The next day at school he hand it to me and it says

Nice copypasta what's the original?

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The movie is terrible, at least as bad as the prequels, but watching people sperg out over "muh womyn" or "muh niggers" is fucking great.

Good, blow your masters as if your life depended on it.

That is the original. Do you want to here how Corwin and I used to sit in Mr. Moore's History class and look up freshman girl's skirts when we were seniors because we were both lazy pieces of shit that failed history and still needed a credit of it to graduate so we took the class as seniors.

yes

Okay it's not like anyone from high school will be on Holla Forums so it's not like they will find me.

Me and Corwin were both 17-18 at the time. We were both losers. Taking freshman classes because in his case he would rather skip school and play video and watch anime on VHS and me because I was poor white trash and had no hope for the future so I would just go down to the cliffs and drink alone most nights and end up sleeping through class. Now me and Corwin had known each other since the 3rd grade when his family moved to town and he enrolled in school on the day of our class trip to the capital. Neither of us really had friends but we knew each other sort of through other people.

So anyways we end up in Mr. Moore's freshman history class, and by this point no one gave a shit about me and knew I didn't cause any problems so I would come to class buzzed or high and they would ignore me. So one day a few weeks after the semester started I am sitting next to corwin in the back of the class and I start trying to talk to him. He ignores me and tries to go back to reading his comic book and I think
Now I should probably explain how Mr. Moore liked to set up his class. He had half the class on one side and the other half on the other with their desks pointed in the middle and he would walk between the two sections and talk about shit.

Anyways I am kind of dejected from being ignored, so I slump down in my chair to try and take a nap, and I look across the class and I see Erin Kiefer wearing a miniskirt with her legs spread wide open and her panties showing.

I sit back up start tapping Corwin on the arm until he finally looks over at me pissed off and I sort of gesture to him to follow my lead. I slump down in my chair and look at him until he does. Then I point over at Erin and turn to look. His glasses looked like they would fall off of his face.

For the rest of the year we sat in the back of class bullshitting, cracking joke, and looking at 14 year old girl's panties.

You know looking back as bad as things were life was still fun when I was young.

damn it was right there, just waiting
perfection
fuck disney forever

plus, he had actual buttons you could press
although good luck with that

Your first story was better.

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Funny how Poe was at closer range and shot behind kilo ren and kilo ren stopped the bullet mid air not even half way through its traveled destination.

But chewie being a much further distance and shooting in front of kilo ren the laser hits him, none the less it does less damage that what we saw as examples earlier as the gun being used.

The laser hit was a retarded contrivance to make Rey beating him more believable.

He's not supposed to have presence. He's supposed to be the leftist's image of evil: a wiry pathetic white male living on nostalgia who's an ebil KKK nazi. It's all part of the social programming agenda at Disney.

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trips of truth

Which I'd actually argue wouldn't be a bad thing if Kylo Ren was actually uber-powerful like the opening scene seemed to imply. Like a loose cannon of sorts, who can afford to be emotionally volatile because he can effortlessly kick anyone's ass.

Oh, fuck off with your humblebragging about your Gary Stu villains, Zahn. Just because your novels tended to be the least shit part of the EU, doesn't make them any good.

And besides, your other Mara Sue was already wrecking the EU with her presence long before Jewsney wiped the slate clean.

I'm listening…

I wasn't aiming to impress. I was just telling shit like it was. This isn't high drama. You are asking about the actual bullshit I have had to live through. Mr. Zahn was a weird fuck and Corwin was to a different degree. Asking about how I made friends with him isn't going to be Academy nominated shit. It is just a loser who has failed at everything he has done in life except kill brown people in the middle east telling bullshit stories about probably the only person in this world more miserable, lonely, and angry than himself; Corwin Zahn.

There aint much to listen to. Do you want to hear how Timothy Zahn's son raped Kate Lindsey and I was too much of a coward to get in on that because I had a weird flashback on how her dad molested my sister so I ran away while he was pounding away at her and the last thing I saw when I turned around was her with tears in her eyes reaching towards me say
and how I have spent twenty five plus years trying to figure out what she meant?

Bandon Oregon is a very fucking dark place to look into. Especially during the 90s. I had one of my childhood friends big brothers decide to lose his shit and break into a bunch of trailers on night and start stabbing and raping all the people that lived in them. Girley Crum.

Hell the water boy on my wrestling team Ray and his brother decided one day to corner a 60 year old woman on her morning walk and then they gang raped her before stabbing her to death and carving her face off and walking into town with knives in hand wearing her face like a mask.

Do you want to get into why the day Tupper Rock was broken my brother went into a seizure and blacked out. He walked out out front door and only showed up two days later after he had broken the windows of all the buildings down town made a dress and mask out of a goat he killed and then stole the entire contents of the liquor store before passing out on our roof top.

Bandon Oregon is wesco Silent Hill. Tupper Rock was a sacred place for the natives. The largest piece of unbroken Blueschist in the world. Then the city decided to give it back to the tribe and they destroyed it to build some facilities and the entire town went mad. Rapes, Murders, Arsons, Assaults, Robberies all exploded after the tribe destroyed the sacred rock. Before that it was a model town with active fishing, logging, and berry farming. All that ended and now it is what it is.

He should have died in ESB.

Spoopy.

Needs more ayy lmaos though.

if you're telling the truth though, it'd be hilarious to troll Zahn with

lubbockonline.com/stories/041202/nat_041202038.shtml
murderpedia.org/male.C/c/crum-girley.htm
mindat.org/loc-231994.html
city-data.com/crime/crime-Bandon-Oregon.html

I should mention that Bandon post Tupper destruction has on average 400% more of any particular crime for a town it's size in it's area.

As for the the aliums the Lakey family of said town experiences at least one abduction every three years and ends up with weird growths and non malignant tumors in the members that claim they were abducted.

If you really want to fuck with Zahn ask him why the house of mystery lost it's Vortex and why it is now moving towards Bandon at the rate of 100 feet a year for the first time since 1930.

Oh and the entire town has burned down three time but for some reason the families that form the center of the town insist on rebuilding it in the exact same formation every time, and if someone tries to break out and sell their land to someone else who wants to build something different they lose their shit and scream for that person to be arrested and hung.

Also the population was only around 2500 when I left but almost the entirety was masons or elks and they had a friendly little competition that would happen every cranberry day where they would give out loads of candy to kids, but the side that managed to find and bring the most unbaptized children to city hall before noon would be declared the Pontiffs of the parish and would be in charge of ceremonial shit in town for the year.

Alright you got my attention.

What did he mean by this?

What is there to say? Richard Lindsey was a pedophile that molested the fuck out of his daughter and her friends. Most of the town knew this but for some reason let it go. His daughter ended up getting raped on a daily basis by pretty much everyone including on one occasion Timothy Zahn's loser low rent son Corwin while his only friend got triggered and ran away to the mudding field to hide and try to make sense of what she said while she was getting raped and looking at him.

Wait, it lost the Vortex? Damn, and I wanted to visit there next year.

man, this is just too good, user. What other dirty stuff you got on Zahn?

Zahn doesn't have shit to be honest. He was an outsider and never really got completely corrupted by Bandon when I lived there. Mind you it has been 16 years since I have lived there and in that time Anna Zahn has gone from looking like Mara Jade when I left to the troll she is now. Who knows how that perverted place has affected his brain.

And yes the vortex has drifted since Tupper rock was destroyed. It is moving towards Bandon a a frankly alarming rate.

So there was no reason for her to think you had promised her anything? Maybe she was just babbling whatever she thought would get you to help her.

I don't know. My grandpapa took me to a mason meeting when I was nine and every memory after that until I left bandon is hazy.

BUT HEY! on the plus side I beat up two homeless people outside who were trying to break into my neighbors' car when I went to grab a cigarette about an hour ago and I am still riding high on the fumes of that.

Plus whiskey

And shitpostin on Holla Forums

And the neighbor whore doing a freebe sucking my dick because I had an erection over some touhou pic I saw that lasted half a day and I was afraid my dong might drop off if it didn't go soft which was reason enough for her, but I think the real reason was that I have been taking her son on my daily runs and teaching him to fight between trading third gen pokemons with him,

tbh tonight is a pretty bawler night for me

Jee-sus

I truly believe they cast that weird looking fuck and wrote him as a whiny child specifically so no one can root for the ebil empire. OT had Vader, one of the coolest looking villains in cinema history. He was capable and a badass. Enter the new trilogy, where we can't have people look up to the white villains anymore.

That or he will have a redemption arc and resist Snoke and come to the Light side.

I just can't get over this. who the hell came up with this name, and how did no one look at it during pre-production and say it's retarded?

Wasn't there some novel or comic fight where a guy shut down Vader's suit by pressing the chest buttons mid-fight?

SNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKE

A woman probably came up with it.

just like Nicole Kidman in Dogville

So everything you've said about Indian curses, rapists, and masons could just be your imagination?

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You like grimdark movies for hardcore cinephiles such as yourself?

I don't know, it sounds pretty solid to me. No joke man.