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Да-да я

oh sh!t did it die?

Kanra, come online to discord please

my computer is making some really fucked up noises someone please help

Even your computer can't stand to be around you anymore.

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Clean it

Loafie on suicide watch

At least your comp. making only fucked up noises

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please don't say that

elaborate on that please

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My computer also makes fucked up motions

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Put it out of its misery so it doesn't have to sit next to you anymore.

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spectre is roasting loafie like a sunday joint

Has anyone ever heard of this webcomic? It's really good and I don't know why I don't hear it mentioned more. Probably the below sub-standard art.

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She can clean the floor with her tongue

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not going to happen pal
besides it sits in front of me not next to me so you just played yourself

Oh God, it has to stare at you all day? I feel bad for it.

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Imagine, it has to intake the very air that loafie pollutes

We should put together a rescue fund to go save that computer. Can you just inside the things loafie forces it to do?

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not really it doesn't have eyes

yeah set up a gofundme so I can get a new PC great idea

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Pizza guy brought me 2 pizzas even though I only ordered and paid for one.

My lucky day.

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I bet he breaths heavily into it as he frantically Googles all his granny porn.

Would you really want to be put on that entry team?

Thank God for that.

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Thank you ma'am, may I have another.

Did you give him some lovin'?

I do not use Google, have no interest in granny porn, nor do I breathe heavily

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There's one where she isn't wearing panties too I think but it was censored so I didn't bother downloading it

Gods no, I was starving.

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We aren't going to get you a new one to abuse!

I was going to hire scoots.

how exactly have I abused this one
the only abuse I've done is to myself when I spent far more than I should have on the current one I have

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I am not a fag

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Would to happy let your parents view every single thing in your history, before you edit it?


That's okay, I'll enjoy this 2B pic just as well.

The poor bastard... but I suppose that's one way to dispose of Communists.

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loafie is a good boy
don't bully him





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Fucking Communists, man. Why are those still a thing?

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evening nezi

yeah probably
I doubt they'd have the patience to go through every site I've visited and everything it means

this is a good comment

I'm still not a fag
I haven't changed much since you accused me of being one 2 minutes ago

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This almost sounds like an actual thing.

Because we lost Rhodesia.

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hello cutie

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You havent chaged since being a fag to being a fag in present?

gay boy bumder

How about we form that United Front and expel these LOAFIE'S.

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I am even more concerned for your poor computer at this point!

Well we need to eliminate all of them.

I know how to do it with a knife... but in your sleep sound boring...

What about a long sword?

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Why does life suck so much?

>tfw using my ancestral Claymore to cleave loafie in two and finally bring an end to the War of the Five Faggots.

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That sounds like an expensive endeavor. Usually they just take care of themselves through infighting.

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how are you doing cutie

I previously was not a fag, and I am still not a fag

the noises stopped, I think all I needed to do was a restart

you can do it when I'm awake then I'm not going to complain

don't try me cunt

But at what collateral damage?

just thinkin about you~

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sounds like you really want to die...

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1v1 me in single combat

Future statistics we'll quote to claim the dangers of such an ideology.

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why is that
and are they good or bad thoughts

I don't particularly want to, it's just the fact that in the face of death (you) I think I have accepted my fate

no I'm scared

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Don't we have plenty of those from the last century?

Submit, and acknowledge my claim as KING.

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and why would I want to do that

Otherwise I will destroy you, utterly. Without mercy.

That honestly sounds like a good idea. The outcome will be the same anyway

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Comin' in ur ass.

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God, I hope so.

how sure are you of this fact
the loafie coalition is rather strong these days, it's easy to form an alliance like this when you don't bully people and are nice

it appears we've reached an understanding of sorts
just don't torture me or prolong my suffering or any of that and we're good

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Ive faced bigger and meaner odds and won.
take your chances.

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i didn't mean to greentext

what good is a king who can only speak through violence
he is no good, and thus not deserving of the title, I'd gladly accept anyone but you as king any day of the week

there are many ways that I'm sure you can have fun, does torture have to be one of those ways?

oh trust me.

they are very good thoughts.

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You think it is honour that keeps the thread together? It is fear, fear and blood!!!!

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Hello, my old friend.

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d-don't deepthroat the beer!!!!

no necking!

is your throat okay? ;~;

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well that's nice to hear
I suppose I've been having good thoughts about you as well

you are barbaric and your ways are archaic
I'd give my life, not for honour, but for the stability, safety and security of Holla Forums, and for you if you weren't trying to kill me

erio is this you

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Too late, throat machine broek.

This, this sounds like you are actually going to try and go toe-to-toe with the big man. You feeling big, boy? Let us give these people a show. They all paid for blood. Lemme show 'em what happens to an upstart that steps on MY patch.

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alright sure thing you rude boy
with the power of love and friendship, my victory is certain

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you know scoots my friend we should make a negotiation of some sort, before it's too late
violence never ends well

oh really, like what~?

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time for scoots to go in the iron lung :^(

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Do your people a favour. Bend the knee.

RIP in DIP, thank god honestly.

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tfw see spectre's cute avatar but it's not spegttre

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Sugoi desu ne~

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Re-assigned to Scootalooo Redhead mode

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Don't worry bb I was just tossing out my fishnets trying to catch a bite

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I don't want no trouble..........

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I'm gonna throw you back ;)

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Loafie, Rager, Bard, they're all thieves. They'll bend the knee or I'll destroy them.

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good moooorning speccy

I hope you're having a nice day

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Christ these ribs are fucking atrocious this place doesn't know how to cook at all, if i wanted ribs this fucking tough i would have ripped them off the goddamn pig with my teeth

/sft/ squad

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I suppose thoughts of all kinds about all matters cross my mind
just how great a friend you are and other personal matters...

I'm going to have to seek confirmation from one of my associates first

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hewoo woafie

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Bored as shit! You?

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well.. the real fun starts after your death...

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same actually
just woke up recently and listening to some loud musics
havent even drug out of bed yet
gotta go roll with my buddies later tonight but also gotta wait for them to show up..........

you have any plans for today?
nahhh probably not huh............

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sorry it's springtime and you know what that means

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Hi Bard, I'm MGD

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I'm supposed to be getting drunk tonight with a cute boy

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That sounds REALLY gay.

Nah, not really, maybe listen in on some people play some rpgs or something later.

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evening bard how are you

that's good then
mutilate me or do whatever you like to do once I'm dead, I'm not too bothered what happens to my body
just try and keep sexual acts to a minimum if you can

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That sounds pretty fun
Allcohol is gross but being drunk is fun.........
Last night me and my buddy couldnt find a pipe so we smoked out of an apples and he invited me to the bar sometime in the future but I've never been to a bar before..........

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I love how bodies go really limp once it does, it's a major turn on for me

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I'm going to torture your next love interest

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nah it'd only be gay if i rolled with you instead

you have any music to send my way today?

Sleepy...........just woke up recently and gotta pass some time....

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Fireball kinda taste like candy.

If you drink your social anxiety might go away.

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Probably true.


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finally the game for me

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Do you drink at bars or do you and some friends just get some bottles to kill them?

I used to party like that when I was like 15 and went with my brother to quite a few jams like that and it was fun to drink but since then I drank way too much and now when I smell or see or taste liquor i get the ptsd in my tummy....
I get stupid when I drink so I dont like to do it much either

Fireball is gross btw

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If you drink you could also become an alcoholic and every depressive trait you have could be amplified.

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I thought that was a big ass instead of a guitar for a second.


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I hate you, Bard. I hope the worse possible things happen to you and only you

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Take a can of compressed air, and clean your components

Good morning friends :)

Ni No Kuni 2 makes me happy

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Do me a favour love, could you deal with Loafie?

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Yes, master :3

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Its the easiest thing in the world to drink though.

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This track is in my opinion possibly the best produced song i've ever heard and it has a very special place in my heart and I'm glad you are listening to it

Clams casino is such atalented producer and he has other tracks that are nearly as good as that

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wtf i hate zcootaloo now ?

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I will take everyone you love away from you

I am is that so unbelievable
I'm surprised you aren't insulting me for it

well I wouldn't want to ruin your fun
just don't ejaculate on me that's all I ask

stay strong bardo

where can I buy a can, and what would be a reasonable size for me to use

morning senpai

please do not "deal with me"
I can't say I can see what you do in scoots

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every post blood-chan makes me think really hard

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mornin Loafie! How are you doin?

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That is my girl, rowdy as always

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Bard. I thought we had a good thing going. We are buddies, pal.

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Oh... nice!
It's definitely a good song, and now I'ma check out more Clams Casino.

What about you? Whatchu got?

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I'm fine
just dealing with scoot's antics as per usual, waiting for this F:NV download to finish already

hello friend

been kinda brainwashed the past day or so searching through Glass Animals albums for gold

but here is a good one in the same vein

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Cumming is the reward I get after playing with you for awhile ;__;

What do you think about?

I think I'm going to kill Bard after Loafie. I want to shove Bard's head into the deep fryer at his job

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spent 5 mins on this class act meme in ms paint

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What will you do to loafie? Kentucky Fried Bard?

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Hmm, I had a song by them in that big playlist I gave you I thought, but now I can't find it.

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It was probably 'Even though' ft giraffage

which is also a very good song

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there's no negotiating with you is there
cum inside me then, it's not like I'll be complaining

I always liked fallout 3 but everyone else tells me fallout new vegas is better.

what happened in your life to make you the way that you are.

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my bois


I have to smell Loafie in order to know what I want to do to her...

And yes, I'm going to fry the flesh off of Bard's skull

What if you get pregnant...?

I can only tell you that in private...

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Hi rager uwu

the last time we had a private conversation you talked about how you threw cats out into the cold and how you used to have a crush on george.

No offense but I'll pass ;g

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I could break every bone in your body in less than 10 minutes and I wouldn't think twice

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houwu are you?

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Yes, master

I got bored of them so I threw them out, idc

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Mmm... I'll take your word for it.
So far I haven't found a song by them I like as I sit here and flip through them.

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Do it, bard. do it, fight me

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Give me that Loafie skull, beloved

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aww that's okay buddy I won't force you into something you don't enjoy because I respect your musical opinion

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you're strange!

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Why arey ou starting this dumb shit today I was having a fine day until you started acting a nigger

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my arms hurt
what the fuck is up with you?

Why are you taking this shit so seriously. It is no fun when people like you and loafie take shit so seriously.

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finishing up season 3 of skin wars with george and muz! Gotta clean my room tonight but :shrug:

why ya arms hurt?

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I've wanted to play 3 for a long time but for some reason it's got a mountain of technical issues that new vegas doesn't so I never have been able to play it
also apparently NV's better anyway so I guess I should be glad it's not the other way around


I cannot get pregnant if I'm dead

please do not take things I say out of context

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scoot I promise by monday I'll have the erwin folder up and running

but I want it

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yesterday I picked things up and put them down
for hours

my dear sweet loafie
how are you doing?

If BC was talking that shit to me I would have him on the ground from a lateral drop in under 3 seconds

I demand the same basic level of respect that I give to everyone

you wanna say you're gonna put me in a fryer? I'll drop you on the fucking ground with a lateral drop and snap your rotator cuff with an omoplata and I can promise you will never use that arm again

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This sounds promising. I swear, if the deadline is missed. There will be consequences.

Well, you get the Bard skull also... I mean, you are being a little greedy.

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How bout you back them big words up you cotton pickin' hootnanny.

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415 west main street
washington iowa

Name the fucking time

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How should I know, I don't live in the UK

Aww gee thanks.

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I just have to cum harder...

I really want Bard's skull more than Loafie's... What does Loafie want?

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Today at 11pm, outside Wellington's Tools

Loafie needs a good gutting.

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This is my new song

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What's something interesting I can use to gut her open with besides a knife?

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Fuck you for ruining my day
I hope you die in a gas explosion you piece of shit

go fucking hang yourself you waste of a fucking life

I'm doing well

because globalisation
also I don't think where I live will affect the 2nd part of my question

if you want to bear someone's child you'll have to make sure they're alive when you impregnate someone, how hard you cum won't change a thing

A pen.

It is okay, play some zappa or some corny shit

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die bard die

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leave me the fuck alone asshole

I'm trying to enjoy my one day off a week

I can cum pretty fucking hard

Oh wait I just realizes Bard has me filtered

Tell Bard I'm going to peel the flesh off his bones

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Lmao, whatever you fucking nerd

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Stupid alcohoolic brit nigger

go sniff locos ass you fucking cast aside trash


how does it feel to know that you will never be wanted

never be welcomed by anyone other than blood chan

someone who doesnt give a fuck about you and will cast you aside at a moments notice

Shoot yourself in the fucking face

oh that's right you cant because you're a stupid british piece of shit nigger who cant find a fucking gun

go slice your jugular with a fucking butter knife

Hey, stop asspie'ing, you want your day off. Stop right now nerd.

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I'm sure you can, but that doesn't stop the fact that a fetus cannot develop inside the body of someone who is dead

go fucking hang yourself

Go jump off a fucking cliff you fucking asshole

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They generally only come in one size
And I get mine at Costco?

I am going to hang myself... a nice looking shirt ready to look bomb tomorrow.

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My cum is the best cum ever, it's healthy asf

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Hey bard, what was it like to have your blueberries stolen by MGD?

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Leave me the fuck alone or Ill fucking murder you

This is where yous top acknowledging my posts, like a real boy. Okay. Nice. It was fun Bard.

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Lol he was such a bitch when he gave me those blueberries too

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The fuck happened to Bard?

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I've not heard of costco myself so I'll have to look somewhere else
but as I said earlier in case you missed it the strange noises stopped so it's not quite so urgent

I'm sure it's very healthy, but unless it's capable of reanimating my dead corpse, you're not going to have a child
why do you want one so bad anyway

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What the fuck is your fucking problem today
I didnt even fucking do anything and then you started talking about frying my fucking head with blood chan

Leave me the fuck alone you piece of shit

you're a fucking selfish self centered asshole
no wonder nobody fucking likes you

Liked by none,
Beloved by all.

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I like children...
I'm still going to cum inside of you though just to make sure you're telling the truth

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sure go ahead
to reiterate myself I'm not exactly going to stop you if I'm dead
just don't be disappointed when nothing comes out of my decomposing and rotten corpse after 9 months

Don't watch this unless you're alone

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c-can i watch you during your decomposing process...?

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Time for me to rest.
Sleep time.
Gimme ni nis


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I'm sorry Bard is such a loser, please rest well

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not something I'd advise doing but if you derive pleasure from it then go ahead
just make sure to wear a gas mask or something I wouldn't want you getting ill

-squeaks at you, dressed in a pear costume-

fuck off

I'm used to the smell, trust me

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I'm going to eat you

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0.0 -tries to run away but is slowed down by the bulky costume-

what the hell is wrong with you people

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this is real life

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the smell is not the only adverse effect that comes with dealing with dead bodies

A lot tbh

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You're OK.

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That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

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holy fuck my sides I'm dying

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I enjoy the smell now, at first I would gag every time I opened my door but after a week I got used to it
And I'll keep you clean don't worry

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I don't get it.

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D: -is not sure you know what pears are for and tries to hide!-

I'm not a scientist but I don't think that's a good idea
still keeping me clean is better than doing nothing I suppose

I have to go, I love you

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-hugs back and laughs happily while swinging. Loves you too!-

I'm topfrag in 99% of games I play in mw2

was destroying in some lobby and some kid is saying he's gonna close my steam account and kept 'warning' me

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-has just heard there will be no multiplayer in mw2 remastered- :

Well if you're banned from Steam now I'll know why.

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-squeaks back to his ps4 to play WWII-

I heard that too. If it's true they're shooting themselves in the foot because they're scared mw2R would be more popular than Black Ops 4

which it could be with multiplayer and balancing of things like noob tube

they're idiots if they don't do it though because they'd make a fortune off both

no multiplayer = trash sales


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-BO2 is his favorite CoD and is eagerly awaiting 4, but would gladly play mw2 again too. WOn't pay any amount of money for their tiny single player missions though.-

considering these days it's impossible to find anything that isn't tdm on mw2 I'm kind of glad the game's already small playerbase isn't being divided with the remaster
or they could just not add microtransactions to their old games and make the graphics pretty and charge full price for a """"""""""remaster""""""" that'd be pretty great too

I didn't, but do it anyway

I want sasuke to crush me between his thighs.

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Boruto's dad's friend?

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god tier bait

I am the master baiter

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Un-dead yourself you fuckers

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I'm only dead on the inside!

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You're like totally harshing my vibe guys

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24 cm uncut dick

What's that in normal people measurements?

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Get new batteries then.

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You making a sex joke?

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I keep it classy.

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sorry pal ;-;

9 in cut

I keep it sassy.

You better be, my feelings are seriously injured and may never recover

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Speaking of classy, you want some more of that hooker scat vid I took a couple nights back?

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Not bad, can you proof it tho?

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don't make me feel guilty...

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Good thing you're a man and your feeling recovery twice as fast as a woman.

I wouldn't dream of it, that would be emotionally manipulative. I was just saying that your actions have harmed me irreparably

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Not very.

Still need to finish the first one. No point in continuing from the middle.

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I!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BEAUTIFUL1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

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I'm sorry friend I hope you get better

Boy if you talked to me for like 5 seconds irl you'd feel it

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I hope so too, what with all the hell you've put me through.

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Rather not.

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Is it worse than conversing with you here?

Alright well whenever you want more, call me the ice cream man with a soft serve special!

Oh. So Lulu is free game then?

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Why not? I'm perfectly pleasant

Nah, because I have some semblance of social awareness irl


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Scatman would be more apropos.

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Sass isn't pleasant.

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please don't say that
I'm very sensitive don't make me feel bad please

Well she isn't into axe wounds, so....

No! That is a stupid song and I don't want it anywhere around me!

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But it's in a joking way and is endearing

I wouldn't say it if it weren't true. I am wholly joking if you didn't get it by now, you have no reason to feel bad. I'm not a snowflake lol

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FUCKING TRANSPHOBE SEXIST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111

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Curious that a man with a taste for shit would have such shit taste.

Only endearing over time.

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Oh no. Words. How dare you hurt me with my most powerful weakness.

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You use to be cool, man.

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Well it's certainly not annoying or anything. No one really has any issues with me irl so

I can also just fucking shoot you if you'd rather have that

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it's ok desu but I am in actuality a snowflake

I have issues with you irl.

No I didn't.


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tb i'm having some delicious whiskey, how about you, got the weekend off?

I will treat you as such then, a unique and beautiful product of nature

I have issues with you irl too, but you won't even meet up to discuss them

I say that YOU are the one in the wrong here


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goodnight friends

thanks you too

Yes please. I'll even pay you.

I thought you did.

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Scotch. "Yes"


Nope, never.

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You're cool to me. So fucking accept it!

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That's not a big yes but I'll take it. You don't seem particularly chipper for having the week-end "off"

Sleep tight

The law would say that is not cool


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I'm my usual cheerful self.


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I suppose so. Got plans?

Then why did you offer?

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It was a rhetorical question ya dingus

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Re-rack my beer. Clean kitchen. Drink.


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Then why say it?

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To fuck with you, clearly

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But it doesn't. It's just words. They still don't hurt.

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Fucking with someone doesn't necessarily mean hurting them

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Ian my love

Oye papi

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Sounds like a plan.

I'm afraid I'm not amazing conversation tonight. is anything new on your side?

Several managers quit.

Work's more annoying.

Manager talked about a promotion. Need to get files together to negotiate pay if that's the case. If I'm promoted I'm getting an unfinished shit sandwich to eat.

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I would have to disagree.

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You should see my company recently, managers and employees quit in droves and the level of shitshow going on is frankly astonishing

And how so?

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Good time to take advantage.

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What's causing the quittings?

Could that involve less hours? Cause you're working way too much.

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I've got a comfy spot :3

I started at kinda the bottom because I was new, but my manager talked me up super hard because I'm good at the job and I got promoted to a specialized unit that handles its own shit. I'm kinda isolated from most of my coworker's gripes and it's great

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Change in ownership. In essence, Management had it easy with old owners, now have to actually work for their pay.

"Yes." I'm only getting about 40-50 recently. Summer's coming though. Will be very busy.

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Lots of quotation marks today.

Well, seeing management get their asses kicked from time to time is nice.

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Faster than a full answer.

More like they jumped ship before their asses could be kicked. Especially with this one dickhead manager that really needed his ass kicked.

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Yeah you told me about that one. Sucks, but at least he's out now. Hopefully new one is less shitty.

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Because that is the best way to'fuck' with people b

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Well wasn't that pleasant. I should sleep now, and finish this whiskey. Probably not in that order. Many loves tb.

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Rest well.

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Stay up all night, don't be a bitch.

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If there's malice behind it, sure

Like you?

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Isn't there malice in everything you do? Isn't that normal for humanity?

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Is it unusual to not have ill intent towards anyone?

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Yes, exactly!

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Perfect, we need more people like you

What's up tonight?

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Ian, did you watch Blade Runner 2049 yet?

I have not, I can watch it right now tho I guess

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Kinda wanted to watch Annihilation tho

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So far as I understand humans, yes.

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It's pretty good despite being low-budget.

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And you are?

No to what?

Then I guess you don't understand me

It was low budget?

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Nothing really, just finished watching that Dragon Ball Super ya dig?
What about you?

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Do not watch Annihilation.

Self-aware bitches.

Wow, what a fucking nerd. I'm sitting here eating ice cream and posting on online forums like a NORMAL PERSON.

Why not? It's a neat concept

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Can see it from the visual effects pretty easily, but otherwise the idea behind it was quite good.
Despite a few plot-holes, but eh, it's forgivable.

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I heard Annihhilation was bad

Everything I've seen had fairly good visual effects... And the concept is cool

From where?

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Darwin told me

I certainly did not.

Why didn't you like it?

I mean he's obviously not right here so

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Well, the backgrounds can look like they're from games at times.
One of the plot-holes is tied to the concept in it.

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I mean we all know Natalie Portman is terrible

But the ideas seem solid

Hm. I'll need to watch it myself then

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But isn't it like:
not bitches > self-aware bitches > bitches

What the heck? I'm basically just doing the same thing as you now! Just without ice cream because I'm not a FAT ASS.

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En que podemos ayudar?

Not for me


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Who was I last night? Jeez.

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If it doesn't come to your mind after watching it, feel free to ask.

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Yes you did.

Let's watch original blade runner together I never seen

Prove it.

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Were you someone different than tonight?

Will do!

I haven't either, I'm down.

"What can we help you with" in Spanish

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So, uh, anything new in the life of Colbs?

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Nothing, you are all useless.

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12:02: Darwin: Annihilation was bad. Unrelated note, I am a shitlord
12:04: Lloyd: Who is this? How did you get this number

It's a date.
Download it now


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What is that from?


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How goes.

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What am I, a data man

Drank a whole bottle of wine and nothing happened

It rained a lot here recently

E-except me, right?

Will do, tell me when

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Fatty got BTFO lmao

So lolz

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At one point, you were.

Not too common there, or?
Has been all of that Siberian weather here with the snowing and ice everywhere.

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Need another bottle.

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Actually I was talking about mostly just you

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Can you gimme the download you're using so we on the same page

Need something stronger

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That too.

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Well it's a desert so yeah

We rarely deviate from a 70's ish norm


When I find one, sure. Can we watch tomorrow?

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Oh, would have thought there'd be more of a difference.
It's like 86F on summer here max and lowest is -31F during winter.

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Beer don't work anymore and the cheap stuff makes me black out.

No sads

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Someone make a new thread with a lewd OP

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Ah, you've reached the point where you need the good shit.

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California ranges from like... 30F to 110F


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Yeah tomorrow nite

That max sounds horrible, how do you live with it?

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You do it

Yes I upset.
Used to just take two beers :c


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I don't have lewd imgs

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Hiding inside


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