Is Star Wars officially dead?
Is Star Wars officially dead?
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>>184991676i wish
Been dead since December 17
It died when The Force Awakens came out.
>>184991676Weird how a $6000 a night hotel that looked more like a futuristic prison wasn't a bigger success
>This hotel costs $5000 per room for a 3 night stay>Its literally just a cheap shitty Mariott with colorful plastic lining the walls and a blue alien who sings to you How the fuck did this stay open for a year
>>184991767Contrarian cuck
star wars blows
I dont think people understand how big of an abject failure this endeavor was. The hotel cost well over $1 billion dollars to build. They had 3-4 months of consistent bookings when it opened and then they had trouble filling it even to half capacity. It's not like this is a ride or something that everyone hated that they can repurpose, this is a specialty made shell, purposely built to be used for a very specific purpose that will now simply be demolished. It's like a 1 billion dollar tire fire. And it all happened in less than 1.5 years. Unbelievable.
>>184992003And on top of this, they can't just turn it into a normal hotel without spending another $500 million. >No windows>No pool>The entire facade is just white walls>The entire interior is cheap, ugly plastic >Only 100 rooms so you'd have to either build more or still charge as much as you do now to make it worth it.What a fucking train wreck
>>184991815"Overnight Immersive LARP" had enough novelty value to catch some interest, but even if they made the LARP themed to the original trilogy, it's too much of an expensive niche concept to gain traction from hypothetical whales and the gameplay was too obtuse to really pull off.
>>184991676It died in 2012.
>>184992070Kek it literally looks like a prison
>>184992003The idea I always see get tossed around is to just turn it into more of a dinner theater/day trip experience and ditch the overnight stays idea entirely.
>>184992147Where the fuck is this? It looks like they process lumber. Is it really in the middle of nowhere? THis hsould be smack dab right beside Disneyland.
>$5000 a night>Still have to pay for your drinks
>>184991676Disney has never known how to manage their brands and no one in their right mind would ever sell an idea to them again.
>>184992154It's too far from everything else and too disconnected and the "day activities" are far too shit to have any sort of draw. The entire point before was the multi-day story line that I guess you could condense to a single day but the "story" is shit and relies on your immersion over a weekend long stay and condensing anything just turns it into shitty Star Wars theater. And with the capacity you would still have to only allow a small group in per day. It'd still be outrageously expensive and lose the only part that really made it unique in any way, which was the fact that you slept there. I think the biggest issue is what's on display here doesn't feel like Star Wars. It's some weird mishmash of prequel, OT, and (mostly) sequel era stuff and what you end up with is a really sanitized generic kinda science fantasy thing. It just sucks.
>>184992249It's next door to the Hollywood Studios park so they can haul you over to Star Wars Land in a plain looking truck (which you don't see the exterior of because they do a space docking trick to hide it) that looks like a transport pod inside.
>>184992003>It's like a 1 billion dollar tire fire. And it all happened in less than 1.5 years. Unbelievable.Disney's been hurting for money. Their animated films since 2020 have likely lost 500 million dollars or more. COVID shut down the parks for ages. Star Wars is out of theaters. Disney Plus is an "investment" so it's billions of dollars for over a decade until profitability. The only thing making cash for them is live action remakes. They have Lion King prequel setup, but they released Wendy and Peter to Disney Plus (not enough confidence in it?). This is wholly unsustainable. Disney-marvel-Lucas just burn cash.
I'd kill to be a fly on the wall in that boardroom when they realized the thing they just spent $1 billion dollars on less than two years ago is completely unsalvageable.
>>184992366>It's next door to the Hollywood Studios park so they can haul you over to Star Wars Land in a plain looking truck (which you don't see the exterior of because they do a space docking trick to hide it) that looks like a transport pod inside.So a fucking prison with prison transport? Do they blindfold you and waterboard you at the end? Everything about this just seems bleak. >>184992421They've been spending 300 million on animated films that have bombed for like 3 years now. I think they've gotten used to it.
>>184992381Live-action Lady and the Tramp was direct to Disney Plus too, but it was some dirt cheap "Beverly Hill Chihuahua" looking crap.
>>184992381The pent up travel boom post-Covid did record numbers for the parks but we're seeing those numbers majorly die off now. Now you see Disney cost cutting, bringing back customer demanded perks, trying to increase value where they can because this summer is looking grim for them. Nobody wants to spend what it costs to go to Disney when the experience is as bad as it currently is.
>>184992003why not just run it as a normal hotel like it should have been from the start and charge 1/1000 and hire like 3-4 larper babes
>>184991776I thought you were pulling numbers out of your ass. >Four guests per cabin (3 adults, 1 child. $5,999 voyage total)Lmao. What the actual fuck? Why would they think people would pay for this?
>>184992494Because there's only 100 rooms, the only way to keep it afloat is charge what they did. >Just add more rooms But yeah this was really what they should have done. Make it a deluxe resort, make up some bullshit like we're on some tropical planet. Ostensibly the idea of "cruising in space" in a metal box isn't very appealing to most people.
>>184992461It's all about the illusion of being on a spaceship in space with your stateroom's windows looking out onto video screens of stuff happening outside the ship. The only daylight allowed into the themed part of the hotel is a small outdoor courtyard garden themed as an "Biosphere Simulator"
>>184992572It looks like Dallas Corbin's apartment in the Fifth Element.
That makes me happy knowing those hotels bombed. Now reskin Galaxy's Edge and retcon the ST.
This was a stupid idea from the start for 2 reasons. 1. Try all you want with immersion but you were in reality trapped in a small hotel for 2 days for $5000. It would take a lot of immersion to make it worth it which brings us to2. They yet again decided to ignore old Star Wars and make nu Star Wars the focus of this which no one fucking wants. People don't want Kylo Ren "invading" the ship they want Boba Fett and other bounty hunters to do that. There also was apparently a chose your own adventure story you did on the "cruise" but it was very bare bones. Imagine if they tried and it had like timed Easter Eggs if you were really smart there would be a hidden guy on the ship at a certain point of the day to advance a secret plot but no woman and minorities wrote it so it's basic shit.
>>184992575>The Star Wars Tatooine Oasis >Full theming, make it some sort of tropical mirage type looking place, really sell it >Deck it out in OT theming, can even add Lukes house as some sort of restaurant/bar who cares it doesn't make sense >Add places around you can just hang out in the ambiance and not have shitty nu-wars crammed down your throat endlessly like Galaxys Edge Charge whatever you want and enjoy the money printer
>cruises are rotated every 3 months>OT cruise is 4 nights. Takes place entirely on the ship, but with large-scale events like the ship losing power, being raided by pirates, or crash landing>Marketed towards super fans who may have already done a cruise beforehand and want a more premium involved experience>ST cruise stays as is, 2 nights and includes the excersion to Battu, a custom lightsaber, and on-board entertainment.>PT cruise is one night, and is less of a commitment but for people who still want the "full" experience for cheaper. Better for families in that regard.>High Republic "cruise" is a 4 hour banquet hosted by the Jedi. Includes a multiple-course meal, some time in the bar, and a tour of the ship. Less of it's own thing, and more of a demo for the full experience. Only a couple hundred dollars and good for guests who are already visiting Disney and could be sold on a few more nights on the Halcyon. Maybe even comes with a coupon for a full voyage. There. I fixed it.
>people actually PAID 3 grand plus for a shitty S oy Wars larp experience >closed a year laterI'd rather get rugged on biz lmao
Jeeeesus christ that's why their shills were seething at House of Dragons and The Last of Us just today. Predictable as fuck
>>184992572You're not paying for the room, you're paying to interact with people in alien makeup and to watch a mediocre "Rey vs Kylo Ren" stunt show at the end featuring an expensive "Physical Lightsaber where the beam extend/retract actually looks somewhat real" prop that gets quickly and very obviously swapped with a proper glowing stunt saber.
>>184992003>Disney fuck up again >billions down the drain
>>184991676This is literally the moment that it died
>>184992492They banked on rich international tourists wanting to come to their parks when they raised prices to extortion levels and it's not working out. What a pity.
>>184991776mfw can spend the same for 3 week trip to japan and have money left over
they would literally put the guests who paid thousands of dollars into this truck to shuttle them down to planet earth or alderan or whatever the fuck lolol
>>184992799Jesus Christ, that's Jason Bourne!
>>184992616I get the logic but it just feels so cramped and claustrophobic. It should be bright and open. It just feels like paying thousands for the prison experience. And hell it should be built WITHIN the Hollywood Studios park not some drive down the street. >>184992665>1. Try all you want with immersion but you were in reality trapped in a small hotel for 2 days for $5000. It would take a lot of immersion to make it worth it which brings us toTwi'leak strippers and handies wouldn't make it worth it.
>>184991676To me it was never about the price. But Rey? Nah, thanks.
>>184992680>a Jabba's Palace-themed bar/restaurant complete with slutty dancers and a performance by an animatronic Max Rebo bandI would pay for this
>>184992834>get in the cuck bus>but you misunderstood. I paid for the Star Wars experience. I want to be a Jedi!>GET IN THE KEK BUS OR THIS STORMTROOPER BLOWS YOUR HEAD CLEAN OFF MAGGOT
>>184992802There's a lot of heavy promotion and discounts for the parks. Seems the numbers are beginning to decline
>>184992003>The hotel cost well over $1 billion dollars to build.the whole land cost them 1 billion so I find that hard to believewhere did you see this
>Star Wars is fucking deadWonderful news
>>184992739Stunt Rey better blow you afterwards for that $6000.
>>184992834I completely forgot about thatWhat a fucking joke
>>184992381>Disney Plus is an "investment" so it's billions of dollars for over a decade until profitabilityThey're already cutting a lot of productions behind the curtains, they used to bleed money but get subscribers but this last quarter they bled money AND subscribers. Disney+ doesn't have a single successful show. Not even cheap, minor ones like succession, nothing, and they can't shut it down without admitting they're in deep trouble so it'll just burn money forever
>>184991676JUST FUCKING DIE ALREADY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>184992147With a shanty town in the back by the dumpsters
>>184992898The cuckbus doesn't even have a droid animatronic piloting it, all you see is a picture and hear a voice talking about all the stuff in Star Wars Land.youtube.com
>>184991676no george lucas no star warssimple as
Seriously, what are they gonna do with it now? Hand it over to the state for a tax write-off?My ideas:>Give it to the Florida dept. of corrections to give inmates a fun Andor-themed prison experience>Use it as low-income housing for confused, scared illegal aliens and don't provide an explanation as to what it used to be>Let the local homeless use it as a shelter as long as they wear costumes and stay in character and entertain guests>Space-themed rehab where all of the counselors are in character and refer to fentanyl as "deathsticks"
>>184992572>Four guests per cabin (3 adults, 1 child3 adults?Mom, Dad and ???
>>184992147>Kek it literally looks like a prisonIt's basically Auschwitz for Star Wars fans. Get 'em inside, gas 'em, then turn them into lampshades and bars of soap.
Disney is going to run Star Wars' brand into the ground thoroughly before they give up on it. They paid 4 billion dollars for the IP and I'm pretty sure they haven't even broken even on that purchase yet because literally none of the merchandising or branding from it has taken off.
>>184991815Also>bunk beds for $5,000/nightIt didn't take long for Bay Area tech sois who'd pay for this just because it has the Star Wars logo on it.
110 percent they are moving it to Anaheim.It's a power move against Desantis >Does Florida want our jobs and taxes, or not?-Iger, less than a month ago
>>184991676The franchise still has propaganda value. The only thing they care about it.
>>184992682This.Cut the price in half.Make the stories the best part. Have actual talented writers work on it. Make there be branching plots so people who go there for a season come back again when the internet leaks that if you go to the engine room at 1:15 in the morning you have a 15 minute window to talk to Luke Skywalker who gives you a secret side quest the other visitors don't know about. He can even give you something to wear that you can show off to the other guests and make them jealous and wonder where you got that.
>>184993134>110 percent they are moving it to Anaheim.user, they struggled to get it booked even on holiday weekends. Nobody wants this shit.
>>184993087wife's boyfriend
>>184992572>Why would they think people would pay for this?Because everytime they excrete at their audience... the audience keep claping.
>>184993087Me>>184993197Except for super rich Disneyland fans who all live in Hollywood..
>>184993075Kek
Reminder that the entire concept was developed by a woman who had absolutely no idea what she was doing. The trailer they made for it was mocked so hard by the public that they deleted it from YouTube and only a few clips of it now exist:youtube.com
>>184992966No one in the world, not even these companies or analysts 100% knows how to make a profitable streaming service because it's all new. Netflix is the only model. The idea is that you have to sink 10+ years into it where you lose money, but build up enough of a catalogue and subscribers that it turns profit. And the model is to effectively trick retards into signing up and then forgetting about it so they focus heavily on nostalgic gimmicks or anything to bait people rather than make quality products.Literally all people wanted Netflix for was to watch DVDs of mainstream movies. I would KILL for all the studios to get together and just make a single streaming service with a vast catalogue of tv shows and movies. No, I don't want to watch some gritty serious Fresh Prince remake with ugly niggers complaining. (Ugly niggers complaining and ugly homos comprise half of streaming material).
>>184993087The Bull
>>184993245>Except for super rich Disneyland fans who all live in Hollywood..Yes, they'll do it once. The hotel will be booked for 2-3 months and then nobody will ever come back because there is zero reason to this more than once. Its exactly what happened in Florida.
>>184993134What a stupid clickbait title
>>184993075You are joking but the US Government would probably jump at the opportunity to buy a small enclosed immersion hotel with no windows to convert into a prison for political prisoners that they can use as a new form of torture.
>>184993134Well I don't live in Florida so with potential selfishness I say I hope DeSantis destroys Disney World. Fuck them. Smarmy culture destroyers.
>>184993134>California taxesMust be nice being able to piss away that much money.
>>184993273>womanMAN
>>184993020oh my god it really is the prison experience. It's just so cramped it sets my teeth on edge just thinking about it. Me in that situation would be screaming "Get me out get me out get me out get me out I want to see the sun."
>>184993134lol Disney cannot leave Florida even if they wanted to, as Disney World is literally impossible to relocate. The size of the park, the amount of infrastructure they've built up, there's absolutely no way they'd be able to recoup from the losses. In the first place who would buy Epcot from them? Who has enough money for them to even consider it? And once they sell Epcot, what then? Where do you find another perfect location in terms of weather, available space, and nearby airport etc to site a new park? And then you have the cost of building it. Disney is still swimming in debt. Any talk of "leaving Florida" is complete nonsense.
>another billion dollar disasterWhat will Disney think of next?
>>184992147they could have made it look like a space ship
>>184993363They aren't leaving Florida. They are just done with long term investments in it.Cancelling the star cruiser AND the Imagineer relocation to Orlando tells me everything I need to know.
>>184993359>"Get me out get me out get me out get me out I want to see the sun."The funny thing is there's literally zero windows on the Starcruiser. They have one boxed in courtyard so you can actually see the sun but it's the size of a small bedroom and walled in on all sides so you can't see out. It's literally a Star Wars Prison
>>184993134Where in CA? Disneyland can fit into a parking lot is surrounded by Anaheim.Plus they'd have to spend an insane amount of money to build Disney world 2.0. money that they're currently burning through with their current long string of failures. They'll have to sell bonds at like 15% interest to get that much cash, and will go bankrupt before they finish.
>>184993134>movingWhy do you idiots think this is simple? The amount of money they would need that they don't currently have would not be feasible to move.
>>184992799That frame in the TFA trailer is what kept me from ever watching NuWars
>>184993435I love how you Disney shills reframe cutting the losses on your abject failure of a larp experience to "Cancelling the Star Cruiser to stick it to Florida". Absolutely hilarious
>>184993273Holy shit that guy is short
>>184993464The star cruiser? Yes it absolutely would. It's a 100 room hotel with a lobby and dining room. All the rest of the props are already made and just need to be flown over
>>184991676It died the moment KK got her hands on it. Don't blame Disney, they just follow the money. Blame the bitch that has done everything in her power to intentionally sink the franchise to spite her old boss.
>>184993380his face says it all
>>184991676It's based on the prequels any random fish baited from a river could have forseen this disaster needing to close down, if disney only listened.
>>184992966>Disney+ doesn't have a single successful showthey had Mandalorian but they massively fucked that one up
>>184992572Because they paid stormtrooper actors to cavity search your assits fundamentally a holocaust simulator experience and jews think you need to pay a premium to experience and empathize with their "historical" suffering
>>184993435>They are just done with long term investments in it.>Literally just announced three new MAJOR lands in two parks in Disney World like two months ago>Bro they're done investing in FloridaYou're fucking high
>>184993655*sequels
>>184993075unironically good ideas
>>184993614They are not moving the star cruiser the star cruiser is a failure that is being cancelled.
>>184993683Two lands with two rides and a restaurant each are not the investment you think they are for the theme park industry.
>>184991676Mega-ultra Super-Duper Extra Extra EXTRA Dead, OP.
die mouse die!!
>>184993435Every second they are in Florida they are investing in Florida autist
>>184993683Those were just Blue Sky ideas they've been tossing around but haven't fully committed to yet, though the Moana/Zootopia replacing Dinoland art looked way more coherent then the beyond Big Thunder Mountain sketch.
>>184993735Star Wars Land took 1 billion dollars to build. The proposed additions are 1/4 of the size of the parks themselves.Disney World has FAR larger throughput, FAR larger capacity, and FAR larger draw to a worldwide audience. Disneyland literally just can't compete and you know nothing about any of this if you are insinuating that it can. Fucking moron.
>>184993435>They are just done with long term investments in it.Lol no. Again, read my post. They will never be "done" with Florida as long as the company remains in operation. The day Disney closes Epcot is the day they shut themselves from the theme park business for good, it's that central to their company. Besides, DeSantis is their primary adversary here, not the state of Florida. DeSantis is an elected politician who will not be in power forever. Disney is nearing it's 100 year anniversary, they've lived through the tenure of several politicians, not all of whom have actively supported the company. The idea that one unfriendly politician would make Disney "Give up" on a decades-long investment into their biggest park is absurd.
>>184992834are you fucking kidding me?omfg lmao
>>184993626Lmao this is shill cope. The mouse doesn’t give a fuck about money. They knew what would happen when they purposely take a beloved IP and make a vessel for propaganda. Money doesn’t fucking matter to the suits at the top, there will always be a golden parachute
>>184991767>>184991841It died when George sold it
It looks like an insane asylum and it's expensive as fuck. No wonder it closed.
>>184993682It just feels and looks like a prison camp with a light sci-fi gloss to it. >>184993273Every bad corporate decision in the last 10 years seems to go down to idiot women. They're just hiring these morons over and over again. They all seem like they're made by some incompetency factory somewhere.
>>184993883Every bad decision in human history is either done by a woman or because a man wants a woman to respect him
>>184991815Manchildren with lots of disposable income
>>184993273I found the full promo:archive.org
>>184993626>Don't blame DisneyShit only got bad after Disney. Lucas might've cheapened the legacy of Star Wars by whoring out the IP to any hack author or game studio that wanted to use it, and then making his atrocious prequels, but Disney fed the Star Wars IP feet first into a wood chipper to turn it into bland pop culture paste indistinguishable from everything else they produce in tone and style.
>>184992147They could have actually built a to-scale Mon Calamari cruiser replica as hotel instead of another fucking Disney cruise ship, themed it after the OT, hired some passionate fan actors and they would have literally made all the money ever. Hell the final day could have been the cruiser participating in the fucking Battle of Endor. There was infinite potential if they had just put up the cash and not fucked up literally everything else. It is almost beyond belief how Disney managed to fuck up a license to print money with Star Wars.
>>184992572>>184993087>>184993311>>184993217>the pod looking sleeping chambers are actually audience chambers for the kekold sessions>kylo ren walks in the door afterwards and chokes the husband until he cums>that'll be 6k funbux
>>184993883Am I wrong in that they didnt do stormtrooper searches?I thought they did which is what makes it so funnyyou pay to go to a prison ship to get gestapo'd
>>184991815you are supposed to actually turn your computer off, leave you room and participate in the repartee with the actors
>>184992147looks like a government black site
>>184992572it was a pretty big hit with theater nerd and youtube reviewer types there's a lot of people who would and did
>building a concentration camp for Star Wars fansBased Disney
>>184992680na na na WOO HEE TANG
>>184994343
>>184993020Time to get unboxxedSheesh I cringed so hardNot even a screen that makes it look like your flying ?
>>184992799We had a field day with that trailer.
>>184992834Good thing he's wearing a mask, wouldn't want to catch space aids.
>>184991676Am I the only one who thinks that being around a bunch of actors LARPing as Disney Star Wars characters would be a great way to ruin a vacation to Orlando?>"Please man, I just want a piece of toast for breakfast I can't eat this weird shit anymore.">"Toast? What is a "toast?" You must be from the outer rim, stranger! Here, try some Corellian Space Biscuits instead!">"HALT! WHERE ARE YOU GOING, PASSENGER?">"C'mon man, I haven't seen the sun in like four days, I just want to go get a diet coke down the street or something.">"HE'S TRYING TO OPEN THE AIRLOCK, SEIZE HIM AND TAKE HIM TO THE CLIMATE SIMULATION CHAMBER."I LIKE Star Wars and this whole experience sounds more like a cringey punishment than anything
>>184994316Yeah so many people that they had to shutter the place after 1 year
>>184992834This whole thing was just so ill-conceived. It doesn't even feel like the typical greedy Jew thing where they tried to cut as many corners as possible while charging as much as possible, it feels like a series of really shitty ideas from somebody too important to say no to.
>>184994444*punt*
>>184994118It’s too bad the human race has peaked and will probably die in a couple of lifetimes, it would be funny to see how the colossal bungling of one of the most profitable IPs ever would be received from future peoples.it’s like if Islams revisions on the semitic religion was so bad that it killed Judaism and Christianity. Like a global failure of “culture”.
>>184993134Are they gonna pack up all their rides too?
>>184994553It's a Star Wars theme prison camp that YOU pay thousands for. >>184994583See:>>184993273
>>184993075I think they need to expand business
>>184994447They saved the "Screen that makes it look like you're flying" for the start of the cruise with the "Room meant to be a pod launching you from Earth to the Starcruiser in orbit" and even that's a small window. youtube.com
>>184993665>MandalorianLiterally Westworld, one good popular season followed by shit ones that nobody watched. Mando won't get cancelled though, they can't replace it with anything else
>>184992421They wouldn’t say anything out loud because a woman was behind the idea
>>184992802>They banked on rich international tourists wanting to come to their parksThat's still the majority of their customer base. Disney World is 90% huge groups of Brazilian families and Europeans who are still retarded enough to think Disney is a fun place to visit.
>>184994046manchildren with disposable income hate Disney Wars though, nobody is buying Disney shit.
>>184994050>archive.org
>>184994553can you really not leave?
>>184994735second season with Luke ending was kino. They fucked it up with Boba Fett
>>184993075just wanted to say that if you didnt steal those jokes, youre pretty funny
>>184994915>the same scene as Vader at the end of Rogue One, but with Luke and droids>kinonah brah
>>184993435>They are just done with long term investments in it.That doesn't even make sense. Why would customers favor more parks with fewer rides?
>>184992492So, hypothetically, do you think people would rather come to Alaska and go to a relatively easily accessible Wilderness Lodge with basic and clean amenities to become one with the wilderness instead of LARPing as an adult child Star Wars fan for a weekend? If it were say...200$ a night, per person? With safe walking trails, kayak access and access to running water and cooking facilities?Asking for a friend.
>>184994795you do it, faggot
>>184995009it's called pottery
>>184994444Why did he do it bros
>>184991841NTA but he's right. It got away with sucking because everyone said "well they had to set stuff up and assure fans they were like the old Star Wars by doing a much shitter New Hope plot"
>>184994735First three episodes were good. By the end of S1 of Mando it was garbage running on momentum
>>184992461>They've been spending 300 million on animated films that have bombed for like 3 years now. I think they've gotten used to it.Box office return is a bonus to Disney, what they really want from their movies is marketable characters and brands they can use for merchandise and attractions in their parks. To this end, their only real success of the last 10 years is Frozen, which is still insanely popular in terms of merchandising and theming. The money Frozen has made them from merch and theming at this point far outstrips the box office returns on the films, and it will probably continue to make them money. This is probably why they were trying to shit out these half-assed remakes of their Renaissance Era animated films, because the characters and brands already exist, they have proven their staying power. The chance to "update" the films is a nice bonus for them, since they no longer have any animators capable of editing the original films without completely destroying them.
>>184991676Another failed star wars project. KEK
You know, ever since chatGTP came out it's made my office job so much easier. I literally only have to work for 3½ maybe 4 hours. It writes my emails, schedules, memos. On my down time i daydream being in Star Wars with me and my friends, shooting aliens with my proton torpedos, showing the ways of the karma sutra to space princesses, fucking shit up with my gundam - slicing the heads off atat walkers. Keeps me happy through the day. Those daydreams are probably more fulfilling than an overpriced "experience" at a rat park.
>>184994553They have rooftop access where you can get air and smoke. Its loaded with plants and shit to block you from realizing you are in Florida. I went there and it was shit. I won two tickets at work secret santa to go. My based wife said she refused to take part in that faggot shit so I took my best friend with me who is an ex con so he says and does what he wants and we just riffed on the actors and mocked them until some black woman pulled us to the side and threatened to kick us. We didn't stop though because my company is a big investor in Disney and even has tons of sets in that secret club 666 restaurant or whatever it is called. When I said that she shut the fuck up
>>184994583It's more an issue of Evermore convincing a lot of people on the design side of things that immersive theater/LARP was the future of theme park entertainment (and in fact Evermore actually did see a few Imagineers jump ship to them in the initial ramp-up) and the Disney people in particular thinking they could actually pull off the stuff that Ken Bretschneider was lying about with their resources.The problem is that LARP is difficult to scale up to the demands of a theme park audience, even with a cheaper theme like renaissance fair or cowboys like Knott's Ghost Town Alive or the Legends of Frontierland thing that Disney did as a test for their Star Wars plans.
>>184995239Tell me about your self insert and his role in the galaxy
Imagine going there and getting some 23 year-old Twi'Lek Disney LARPer girl shitfaced at the bar, taking her back to your room, and grabbing her twintails while you blast her exhaust port from the back.
> “Star Wars: Galactic Starcruiser is one of our most creative projects ever and has been praised by our Guests and recognized for setting a new bar for innovation and immersive entertainment. This premium experience gave us the opportunity to try new things on a smaller scale of 100 rooms, and we will take what we’ve learned to create future experiences that can reach more of our Guests and fans."So, you're saying he's proactive, huh?"
>>184993020>They're greeted by some employee in a wheel chair Kek
>>184995407I am not built to sit there and pretend as an adult. I just can't do that. I couldn't sit there and pretend that was an alien bitch and I am a smuggler or some shit. I would rather be on a real cruise getting hammered in the sun.
>>184992799I think it's perfectly reasonable to call your casual audience "racist" for noticing the storm trooper isn't a clone of the guy the last movie said they were cloned from. Especially if you're too god damned ignorant of your property to give them a reason that is in the lore.
>>184993134Crazy how easy it is to trigger conservatives, look at all those (you)s
>>184995407I feel like you could get this experience for a lot less than $6000 though.
>>184991676I fully approve of the mass gassing of Star Wars fans.
>>184991676HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
>>184993273Kek, so I have a lot of work connections in florida and pic related popped up on my LinkedIn feed a while back. Press F to pay respects for her in her job search.
>>184995182I get the brand and marketing element - but the film's box office is both meant to be profitable (and pay for the initial film) and then launch the series. Just straight up losing 300 million in one year and possibly up to 1 billion in several years is outright disasterous. None of the films have been a hit at all so that's more money lost on toys and products no one bought or cared for.Frozen is such an obvious Disney Princess story it is SHOCKING they haven't figured it out. Instead they hire brown feminist frumpy women to write some story with ugly people and homos and some "generational trauama" horse shit.
>>184991776this universe died when an arrogant lazy narcissistic fool named George Lucas started editing his own films, changing the details in them. and finally the universe died when Filoni's dirty, lustful hands touched it, and his clone wars.
>>184993148They should hire the cast form evermore them park, make it a place to do quests and have an overarching story
>>184995209this would be absolute heresy if it was recorded in the 80s/90s. To think Disney of all corpos would be capable to screw over the biggest sci-fi franchise in existence this bad.I was also about to say that 100% of these boxes are all toy figures of Boyega's character, but then i remember the entirety of Disney's SW universe has 0 redeeming characters or new vehicles/equipment of any interest.
>>184993134>hostile>don't want porn in the school library We are living in a sim stuck on stupid aren't we?
>>184995508I am a liberal and I replied because I am not retarded about how business works. Disney is going to play the smart move and wait out until DeSantis leaves then get all their power back.
>>184995453>They don't stick a gigantic droid costume over himWhat wasted potential
>>184994795>Internet archive posts are hard to search and thus it goes under the radarthat is the point. if plebs and corporate can't find stuff it stays up. get better at searching
>>184995553I know a few escorts who will pretend to be anyone I want for $1200 a night. It's pretty fun.
>>184995620Desantis just threatened to build a prison on the land next to Disney World. Why would the company want to relocate its employees there like originally planned?
>>184995429Corporate speak for:>We burned a lot of money on a complete failure of a project and we will never do anything with that again.
>>184995493>I couldn't sit there and pretend that was an alien bitch and I am a smuggler or some shit.You aren't a REAL Star Wars fan.
>>184995608Yup and have different degrees of stories. For families with kids its a basic vacation with light story elements but for hardcore Star Wars nerds you can hide shit and have secret darker story elements that play out at night when the families are asleep. If they did this I would unironically go.
>>184992799It's funny to remember how outrageous this was. To think 2015 was quaint and innocent compared to the shit they push on everyone today.
"Stop! He's already dead!"
>>184993020So futuristic they wear cloth masks like its 1917.
>>184995693Like what about that is not hostile?
Does anyone have that article written by that absolute soiboi who said he cried over how emotional he felt to stay at this shitty hotel? I remember the article started with him texting his dad. His dad said "can you believe they're charging 6000 a night for this?" And he replied back "can you believe they're ONLY charging 6000 a night for this?"
>>184991676Yeah, but you'll never hear Disney admit it.
Clownfish TV is going to have a field day with this
>>184995271>design park around larping>don't let adults dress up
>>184992572>>184991676It seems like they could do this same concept as a cruise, lord knows Disney loves their cruises, they could do a cruise ship up like a Star Wars thing with larping, and I bet people would line up for itDefinitely more the idea of going on a voyage, rather than some landed hotel in a Florida swamp
>>184995763>$5000 to eat shrimp with blue food dyeHoly fuck this is criminal
>>184995248Think your wife declined cause she didn't want to see you get ass fucked by an ex-con wearing a plastic madolorian helmet
>>184995833Can a paypig post the Jenny Nichsolson star wars hotel video from her patreon please
>>184995590When did Star Wars go from being made by nerdy man children to instagram wine aunts?
>>184995502Storm Troopers are not Clone Troopers dipshit
>>184995939It's all on Kemono
>>184995763>you get to eat scampi but it's been hosed with disgusting blue dyed chemicals in advance to make it look like a space dog's turd and served as dinner worthy of 6k$what the fuck
>>184995970Based thanks
>>184991676I don't think people realize how bad this is as Iger's fuck up moment.Disneyland Paris, the entire resort that's ususally considered the big fuck up but is turning a profit now, cost 5 billion This cost over 1 billion for one hotel, is closing within 1 1/2 years, and there's no future for the building unless they spend hundreds of millions to convert it to a normal hotel.This is, objectively, the biggest fuck up in Disney park history.
>>184993665My mom and sister love disney. Couple weeks ago the app was fucked up and wouldn't start. I came over to help and found out it was on disneys end. She was freaking out about not having access to it. Told her, she have cable tv, a tivo box full of shows, my plex with a ton of shows, netflix, hbo. She didnt care, said that disney is 'everything' to her.
>>184995687See, there you go. $4800 saved for future visits.
>>184996042are your sister and mom fat?
>>184995940directly after this >>184993380
>>184996026Did Iger even have anything to do with it? Who was CEO when it was greenlit?
>>184995986It's worse in the star wars land theme park in Disney.>what if we take a hotdog but make the bun a pita and add cheese and coleslaw and shit that's space food right?
lads do you think some good looking guy got to fuck one of the in-character women?I’d pay $6000 if I could pull that shit off
>>184996114>Definite plans for the Star Wars hotel were first announced at D23 Expo 2017 in Anaheim, California.This was Iger's child, from concept to creation
>>184996042What were they trying to watch?
>>184996185I gotta wonder if this wasn't originally something much better and budget cuts just completely cut it to pieces.
>>184996158The only issue with this hotdog is that it costs $30
>>184996114Yes, was first announced before COVID.
>>184996042I have a 70 year old neighbor in my apartment complex who loves Disney. I set up Disney+ and occasionally watch old Disney movies with her over tea. Her husband died and her kids neglect her so she has no one else. My hope here is that if I do this enough she will include me in her will because she is loaded as fuck.
>>184992739I can't believe they insisted on doing the sequel trilogy for it, like for $5000 a night people want Darth Vader, Han Solo, Princess Leia, they don't want Rey and Kylo Ren.
>>184996158Ok but these are good as fuck
>>184996237
>>184996158But it's made with Ronto meat and grilled under a podracer engine!
>>184995939>>184995970Hey! Jenny needs your money more than Disney!
>>184996280>My hope here is that if I do this enough I'll get to bang herWow bold strategy user
>>184991676>you can literally book a week-long disney cruise for a similar (and better looking) room...*AND* the cruise offers more amenities than just larping as 'faggot in space' for a similar price
>>184995302Well you know, my friends and I go around the galaxy in a starship, my friend is like the team leader - looks like Bill Pullman's character from Titan AE. I'm like Yang Wen-li from LotGH, with a pinch of Anthony Cumia. I got a cop friend whos fat and a cuckold - he stays in the ship and repeats the computer. And the ship's femboy/bartender - he came with the ship. Anyway we go around killing grey aliens, the hutts, the giant space worms. In between, chess time with thrawn, leaving a Cleveland steamer on some blue bitch, eating gourmet fucking steaks and baked potatos from the replicator, and hording jedi artifacts for ransom so Luke will beg like a girl to get them back.
>>184991767It died with The Last Jedi. TFA was an adequate soft reboot that rehashed A New Hope and kept things simple and it visually looked and felt like Star Wars again. TLJ intentionally ruined everything TFA set up and then Rise of Skywalker was a ridiculous Hail Mary attempt to rebuild TFA. The funniest thing about the downfall of Star Wars is that they successfully brought it back to life with TFA and then not only killed it but made old fans actively avoid it.
Disney thought this would appeal to Star Wars fans across the fandom but in reality.>"I love Starwars, even the prequels, but I hate Disney Wars shit. Even if I loved it, I'm not paying five grand for a gay Star Wars themed hotel stay.">"I say I love Disney Starwars just to own the Chuds but truth is I hate scifi and have never watched it, I am not paying $5000 for this.">"I FUCKING LOVE ALLLL STARWARS AND I LOVE DISNEY STARWARS! I LOVE ALL THE SOULESS REMAKES OF MY CHILDHOOD BECAUSE I DESPERATELY WANT TO CHASE THAT FEELING I HAD AS A CHILD! I'M FAT AND BALD AND SPEND ALL MY WAGIES ON OVERPRICED PLASTIC SHIT BECAUSE IT GIVES ME JUST ENOUGH OF A DOPAMINE HIT TO FORGET THE HORRORS OF BEING AN ADULT!!! ONLY 5 BIG ONES YOU SAY!?!? I WILL TAKE 10 NIGHTS! PLEASE, ANYTHING TO ESCAPE THIS HORRIBLE EXISTENCE! IS THAT A REY ACTRESS?!?!?! REY LOOK! LOOK! I BOUGHT THE PARKS $200 MADE IN CHINA PLASTIC LIGHTSABER!!! LOVE ME REY!"But there is like only 100 or so of these whales.
>>184992966They also got caught cooking the books recently for Disney Plus. They were sneakily airing episodes of streaming shows on their various network TV channels and using that as an excuse to hide production costs across different divisions and subsidiaries. D+ actually loses far more money than they've been admitting, and now they are in deep shit over lying to investors about it.
>>184996280>I have a 70 year old neighbor in my apartment complex who loves Disney. I set up Disney+ and occasionally watch old Disney movies with her over tea. Her husband died and her kids neglect her so she has no one else.Dang you're man, user that sure is sweet an->My hope here is that if I do this enough she will include me in her will because she is loaded as fuck.Well at least she has company.
>>184995763You forgot to mention the mysterious space mist that wafts off of it
>>184996363If I got me in the will, I would.
>>184996351Start doing lewds and Ill consider
>>184996351Does she show her butthole? assuming she's over 18
>>184992799Someone post that image of the dude who avoided spoilers like the plague, had no idea that this character existed and had his entire world shattered when he saw him at the theaters
>>184996381>hapa>into scat and cuckholdryNot surprised. Please don't shoot up a sorority house.
>>184996488No. She's almost 30 if not over now and she's rich. She pretends she isn't, but she's a Club 33 member (only rich fucks can get invited) and she owns horses.
>>184996299Consequences of being an extension of the land's "Episode 8.5" story. Hell, when Disneyland's Star Wars Land was loosening the timeline rules and bringing in Mando and Boba Fett, WDW was holding off from pulling the trigger on that for a while because they didn't want to interfere with the hotel storyline. I would not be surprised if "NoOoO, we need it to tie into our hotel's missions" is the reason why the Falcon ride only has the one mission when it was originally planned to have at least three since randomization would just make that hotel side quest difficult.
An actual cruise with a basic Star Wars theme where you drunkingly walk around screaming at Chewbaca and other Star Wars characters would have been better
>>184993273>youtube.com
>>184993020>>184994717>6 BILLION dollarsThis has to be the worst business deal in history. What a disgusting waste of money.
>>184996623>Goldbergs>We have a literal mountain of gold! HA HA HA!>what shall we call ourselves?Stunning.
>>184996422>But there is like only 100 or so of these whales.Huh. There used to be tens, if not hundreds, of thousands of them. Maybe even millions.Wonder what happened to all of them...?
>>184996351Her Patron lists are about as long as the credits of actual movies, she'll be fine.
>>184996280dangerously based, hope it works out my dude.Even if it's feigned, your care for her makes you more deserving than those kiddos.
>>184996598No butthole no watchJlaw understood this
>>184996711Did I mention she's loaded?
>>184996692I spend 8+ hours a week with her. Sometimes I get her groceries. It's basically a side job. I am a borderline caretaker of sorts so expecting money is not wrong
>>184991815I think it's an interesting concept. It just had two problems. One, that the price point was way too high. Two, it focused on the sequel trilogy and not the original trilogy. I know people are going to shit all over it saying only funko pop collecting reddit manchildren would think it's cool, but even boomers have shit like rock & roll camp where they larp as rockstars for a weekend.
>>184993087the co-husband obviously
>>184996623it's almost like disney owns abc and used their shows to advertise star wars landbut had to do star tours because the heeb show is set in the 80s
>>184996737Why would I care if some chick on the internet is rich? She's not riding my dick, and subscribing to her youtube channel or whatever isn't going to get her to ride my dick.No ill will or anything. Good for her for being a baller, but unless she wants to fuck me I really don't care.
>>184996609>An actual cruise with a basic Star Wars theme where you drunkingly walk around screaming at Chewbaca and other Star Wars characters would have been betterDoes Disney still have their cruise liners? They could've just added props to one of the and do this for less than the billion they spent on this failure.
>$6000/night hotel + tip + no free drinks + no you can't actually do anything cool in character you fucking nerd + released in the middle of covidHow could this have failed
>>184993020oh god the music is the cherry on the shitcake.
>>184991676It was an ridiculously overpriced LARP-tel that Kekpek rushed to open
>>184992572looks like kino loy's cell
>>184995271>immersive theater/LARP was the future of theme park entertainmentI'm not convinced it's a bad idea. You have shows like Westworld because it's actually a huge fantasy for many people. It has just not been executed well by anyone so far.
>>184991676DEY NOT HEA
>>184994795>take a video from the internet archive>upload it to .moe>put it back on internet archivewat?
>>184994763>Disney World is 90% huge groups of Brazilian families and Europeans who are still retarded enough to think Disney is a fun place to visit.Brazilian here, my sister has this dream of going to Disney for some mysterious reason. It's not like she's a huge fan of Disney stuff, she doesn't have Disney merchandising, she doesn't watch their movies and pays no mind to news about anything Disney in her daily life. Yet, she seems to have made her life goal to visit Disney in Orlando.I don't understand, it just seems so unnatural. It's as if she wants to do it because it's some sort of social proof to say "I've been to Disney" because that's what brazilians who aren't poor do?
>>184993273>Ann Morrow Johnson>posted 8wthis didnt age well, Forbesbros....
>>184992718Anon, it is with the heaviest of hearts that I must tell you that it cost DOUBLE that.Disney Adults still paid for it.
>>184996536>Someone post that image of the dude who avoided spoilers like the plague, had no idea that this character existed and had his entire world shattered when he saw him at the theaterskek i wanna see this
>>184996978Seemed like some sort of psychological torture training session for the eventual antichrist train rides to the guillotines.
>>184996978Part of a music playlist heard in the park's cantina. Ever wanted to hear Jawas rap?youtube.com
>>184997045The trick is you need no limits and when I say no limits I mean having sex with someones dressed as Rey should be on the table. Westworld showed you why it works because all everyone did was rape, kill and consume food and beverage pretty much breaking all the 7 deadly sins.
>>184997188That made me hate all of existence.
>>184996351She is cute bute she comes off as really bitchy in her videos
>>184995182It's almost like white middle class families are the only viable audience for Disney and they should only make movies for them.
>>184997188this is very bad
>>184995940Instagram wine aunts have taken over many industries, especially nominally-creative ones. It's an interesting phenomenon.
>>184997134>Seemed like some sort of psychological torture training session for the eventual antichrist train rides to the guillotines.I wish we'd get more Schizo end-times stories made. Devilman from the 70's starts adapting Revelations and no joke uses Jack Chick comics as inspiration for some later chapters. But it's really brief. I think you could make some kino horror build around anti-christ nightmares.
>>184992320I dunno man, I still think they had something here. They just didn't make the right choices. They could have done something like split the attraction into two groups, cheaper general admission, for people who want just explore the open areas, take pictures, have lunch at a Star Wars themed bar and grill. Then have a super expensive VIP tier for people who want to be a part of the theater/LARP experience. You let the casuals paying general admission fee bank roll the operation, while providing exclusive entertainment for the VIP tier groups.
>>184997188KRIKUYA BOKOKA, XHIKUYA BOKOKAUTINNI BOK'SUGA, UTINNI BOK'SUGAKRIKUYA BOKOKA, XHIKUYA BOKOKAUTINNI BOK'SUGA, UTINNI BOK'SUGAMAMALU LUPIMA, MAMALU LUPIMAIIYATA KOPUXHA, IIYATA KOPUXHAMAMALU LUPIMA, MAMALU LUPIMAIIYATA KOPUXHA, IIYATA KOPUXHA(Hen'do iigada lasu!)XHIKUYA BOKOKA, XHIKUYA BOKOKAUTINNI BOK'SUGA, UTINNI BOK'SUGABABALU LUPIMA, BABALU LUPIMAIIYATA KOPUXHA, IIYATA KOPUXHA
>>184997189Depends on if you are talking about immersive theater or a real-life video game. In Westworld it was the latter, and they were robots. Obviously in real life no actor signs up to be raped by fat nerds, so the "theater" part would be knowing you can't go too far.
>>184997318Or just stick around, shit could get real fast.If someone shoots Charles Windsor in the head and he lives, consider heading for the hills.
>>184993087Teenage child
>>184996413>TFA was an adequate No it wasn't. >soft rebootIn what way was it a reboot? Because it ignored continuity? We just call that a bad sequel.
>>184996413I agree user. Crazy that rian johnson or w/e his name is, is now going to be in charge of the next trilogy too
>>184996413>TFA was an adequate soft reboot that rehashed A New Hope and kept things simple and it visually looked and felt like Star Wars again.Holy shit you star wars fans are insane
Guys I can salvage this shit with just two works. Twi'lek hookers. Think about it.
>>184997418Can I get a qrd on this? Something in revelations mentions a monarch attempted assassination?
>>184997458TFA was a good movie, and it wasn't a reboot in terms of continuity, but had all the aspects of a soft reboot/rebootquel such as the recontextualization of familiar concepts and characters (member the Millennium Falcon?)
>>184997345You could also enact some battles with the VIP guests that the pleb low tier guests could only observe. You would get money to promote the higher tier.>Geonosis battle scene where 400lbs whales run around in moisture farmer costumes whacking cardboard bugs
>>184996424Is a streaming service really that expensive? They own all the properties, and have 100+ years of content they can release. Why is this not making money
>>184991676When the sale of Star Wars to Disney was agreed, the amount paid to Lucas was announced to be at $4.05b, but because the deal was actually half cash half stock, and because Disney pays yearly dividends to shareholders the increase in the share price and the dividend payments on 37 million shares since the sale, means Lucas has received closer to $10 billion from the deal. If you then consider all the costs of making movies, marketing, theme parks, launching Disney+ etc, I can't imagine how Disney ever hopes to even break even on this shit.
>>184991815Don’t underestimate the power of Star Wars nerds my ex gf was a big Star Wars fan and would buy and consume anything with Star Wars on it
>>184997084There's the easy to search direct uploads to IA, then the impossible to search "wayback machine". If you want a video hosted FOREVER upload it somwhere that's a direct link. Then save it via waybackmachine. Then take the video down. Bam free internet hosting forever.
>>184991676I thought the jew was good at making money? Is it only usury they are good at, detested by everyone else?
>>184995248this is the most obviously fake story I have ever read but it's very entertaining so thank you
>>184992003>The hotel cost well over $1 billion dollars to build.I call bullshit, is this hotel made of solid gold?
>>184997188This is something I would come up with in a drunken ironically-retarded Star Wars tabletop campaign, not an actual unironic attempt at creating Star Wars.
>>184997707I hope you wrote Blue Milk Mammary on your dick.
>>184995248Really? Wow, user, you're so cool.
>>184997626He just so happens to have all the signs of the antichrist, he even gets his power from a red dragon and is symbolized on his coat of arms as different..beasts.His coats of arms says:>Ich Dien (I Serve)right next to the red dragon, below the unicorn that is pale gray green, the color of rotting flesh.[Why German? Because that's what they are.]...Maybe. So he could be the rider that sits upon the "white horse", that is, he is death.
>>184997518>the next trilogyno way
>>184997105Every single one of these bitches is plugged 24/7 into insta/twitter. Ever wonder why they seem like a hivemind? That's why. It directly affects their output as they actually craft their lives around getting online social media praise or not. They think internally "oh no, if I do this they won't like me" and alternatively that they will get praise for certain things. If some films look like they're designed to appeal to the twitter crowd, this is why. They fantasize about going on twitter and bragging about how they had a hand in making the first homosexual genderqueer transgender buttplug movie featuring the first on-screen teenage anal sex.
>>184993020LMFAO. when the music kicks in it genuinely seems like something out of zero dark thirty.
>>184995248Based. I used to have a convict friend and he was the funniest fucker I ever met but man he couldn't stay out of prison and would keep going back in.
>>184997698You have no concept of how much it costs to maintain servers necessary for on-demand video streaming that can be accessed anywhere there’s an internet connection. The only winner in this scenario long term is AWS
>>184997772comedy gold
>>184991676My brother and his wife took their boys a few months ago, they overall had good things to say but I remember they mentioned it was overpriced and it starts to get old fast.Also there is basically zero incentive to return because it's part of an "experience" where everything is scheduled from start to finish during the stay and it doesn't change from one visit to the next.
>>184992898fucking kek
Does the park have like quest lines? Like can you be walking down the street, see a rebel trying to hide, and then be dragged into a story that evolves on it's own, without being on rails or needing tickets? If it doesn't have that what the fuck are they doing?
>>184995763brightly-colored savory food is just wrong.
>>184993020This whole ride/hotel is rife for parody. From the detatched ditzy insta aunt who dreamed it up, to the prison camp experience it sets up.
>>184997963>Also there is basically zero incentive to return because it's part of an "experience" where everything is scheduled from start to finish during the stay and it doesn't change from one visit to the next.This is where they fucked up. Every year should bring a new season and theme. Imagine if the hotel had its own separate plot and it tied in (although very minor) to the shows and movies giving you an incentive to go and go every year? I have no idea how they thought this was going to work long term as a static one time thing.
>>184997112>Disney Adults still paid itevidently they didn't, given that it's closing down after barely a year of operation.