User, are you a cineaste?

user, are you a cineaste?

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>>164630040Northman > The Flatman

>no helmet, no armour, completely shirtlessI'm so tired of hollywood "vikings"

A pederast?

What a cineaste hole


>so good I almost passed outSounds like he has low T. Or maybe an iron deficiency.

I really want to see it but my wife's boyfriend told me not to watch movies that are overwhelmingly white. I kinda have to agree.

>>164630040“people” have described A24 movies in a similar way. This shit is just grimdark Hamlet yet somehow more gay. I sleep.

>>164630307>berserker>not wearing bear skin

>>164630374some people you just can’t please

>Ukranian flag

>Ukranian flag

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>>164630374The movie only feels gay when women are on screen. It's not a joke. Women are fucking embarrassing.

>>164630307My love for you is like a truck

Finally a movie for white men in a society full of women and blacks, Berserker Gang rise up

>>164630040whitebros we won.

>>164630098he's a berserkerbare, no shirt.

>>164630778>meanwhile, vikangz in reality

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>Robert Eggers

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>meanwhile in a real metal

>>164631070>nigger soldier close-up in the first minutekys

>>164630307>>164630778>berserkerAh yes, finally something historical and not totally fantasies about the vikings lmao

>>164631177It's supposed to be a mythical saga, a historical fiction epic. Think King Arthur, not PBS reenactment

>>164630654Did he say making fuck?

>>164630098Wouldn't Hollywood Vikings have horned helmets instead?

>>164631070>01:09Closed not watching the rest of this clip

>>164631070Guy ritchie directed that? Never even heard of it.

>>164630098What I'm fucking tired of is internet history spergs who can't seem to fathom the concept of artistic license

>>164631582Yes, they didn't even bother to have historically accurate inaccurate Hollywood vikings. That's how little effort has gone into this shit.

>>164631886I don't even have the click the trailer to know, it's the worst movie he ever did but you should watch it. It's going to be Constantine in 5 years.

>>164631929>ConstantineSo kind of good, some nice elements, but absolutely not worth watching more than once? It exists to make you wish it was better?

>>164631929>It's going to be Constantine in 5 yearsConstantine is a good movie.

>>164630307Berserkers weren't actually real.

>>164632104where the term come from then?

>>164632104You can’t prove that

>>164632019I watch Constantine and Devils Advocate together one a year or so. The point is that it's a style of movie which enough time has passed to be removed from it's context of "yet another" drab cgi heavy historical epics like Dragon or Narnia or countless other LOTR ripoffs to be appreciated on it's own and let the choices of a talented director shine through. >>164632046Yes.

>we'll never get the berserker movie directed by mel gibson staring dicaprio with all dialogue in ancient swedishfeel with me bros

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>>164630654Do you want to making fuck berserker?

>>164632019yes. the "mode" i guess you could call it, that arthur enters into when he uses excaliber is fucking dank as fuck.

>200+ movies a yearis that supposed to be a lot? I've watched like 130 or something since october. that isn't even 1 a day

>>164630098I cant speak for Vikings, but multiple Roman sources do attest to Celtic warriors fighting nude even in quite large numbers

>>164630375Doesn't even have a shield to bite.

>>164631284You are right. It is OG Hamlet.

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>>164630307>>164630375he's ulfhednaryou can see the wolfskin in the trailer wonder why vikings have become so popular in hollywood lately?

>>164630040thats some cringe shit. but the new vikings series was pretty entertaining. The romance and plot lines where whatever but the action was p gud.

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>>164630040why does everyone who uses twitter type like a teenage girl

>>164630098hollywood exists to make money, not teach history. all but the dumbest understand this. that said, i agree that the viking meme genre needs to go, it's as bad as the zombie shit became at this point


>>164632837This, we need more Roman kino

>>164632104Multiple sources attest to them, but they are often in different contexts. So each Berserker would be different from the other types. The King's Berserkr, the Hall-Challenging Berserkr, the Hólmgangumaðr, and the Viking Berserkr

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>>164632837>Viking memeThis is proto-Shakespeare. An Ur-Hamlet story.

>>164632837>hollywood exists to make money, not teach historyCapitalism is truly a cancer.

>>164630307>Olaf, metal!

>>164630040>200+ films a yearSo, uhh .. a NEET?

>>164633058Cinéaste means filmmaker, so who knows?

>>164632104Oh yeah, then how did I become one? Huh? You just go debunked.

>>164633058I have a full time job and easily blast through that many in a year. The trick is to watch them at 1.5x or 1.75x speed.

>>164630040As cringe as the tweet was, I haven’t been this hyped for a movie in a long ass time. Eggers is the only guy putting out nothing but 10/10s now and the concept of viking Hamlet is great. His ability to absorb old writing and speaking styles is amazing especially compared to all these retard movies where anybody from more than 300 years ago speaks with this dumbass pseudo english accent and dialect for whatever reason.

>>164632986>This is proto-Shakespeare. An Ur-Hamlet story.the story predates shakepeare by 1000 years.

>>164633149based and geniuspilled

>>164632837>all but the dumbestYou would be surprised! People are... retarded! Many just see what is on TV and, inscrutably enough they believe in the television. Of course everything on it is in some way representative of reality.Even unconsciously, we associate the repetition of data/occurrences with the necessity to store that information as useful. Think of the way we learn our first language, purely through repeated memetic inference. Do you think that could happen on some "higher" level of cognition? Do you think that the repetition of phrases, tropes, ideas, etc. could function in a similarly memetic role?That said, do you think that it's a decent, or at least good-faith concern that it might be our duty, as the people who will be leaving the world to future generations, to hold or start holding Hollywood to a higher, more accurate standard when it comes to what they depict and how they do it?

>>164633058it's one film every other daynot hard to manage at all

>>164633227Amleth or Amlóði was around 1200 AD. which one are you talking about?

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>>164633391That one is from Gesta Danorum (Deeds of the Danes), which has a Hamlet like story in it. But that story is set further in the past, so maybe that is how you get 1000 years before Shakespeare.

>>164633265Protip: I know how you view yourself, but the irony here is that you are actually one of the dumbest that user referenced, who doesn't understand that Hollywood doesn't exist to teach history.

>>164632837>hollywood exists to make money, not teach historyWhile it is true that authenticity to some time nobody is familiar with is usually dispensed with by film-makers, when there is extreme attention to detail in the background, writing, etc. without explicitly bringing it to attention, it makes for much better movies. Eggers is the last guy you could accuse of inauthenticity. Berzerkers went into battle naked, tripping balls.

>>164632743Which is not baersark... you would think you could read and understand written language, but your post proves otherwise.


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>>164633884Kind of a subtype of a Berserker. There are a lot of variations, similar stories, and attestations.

>>164631891I don't care about the historical accuracy that much the aesthetic is just overplayed and boring as fuck at this point, can you fathom that?

>>164634038Don't watch the movie, then. I'm sure that a cinéaste like yourself has many other films on your watchlist. Gotta hit 200+ films watched per year.

>>164633559>Hollywood doesn't exist to teach historyNot with that attitude. Demoralization is the goal.

>>164633036>state funded movies would be so much better shirley you cant be seriously implying that movies would be better if they didnt have to please an audience

>>164633490But actual vikings looked way cooler than those twinks with the faggy undercuts you see on tv.Hell, they had one of the most aesthetic helmets in the world. Accurate vikings would look way cooler, so why not do that?

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>>164634113Everyone you know finds you pedantic, exhausting, unlikable, and it's not because you intimidate them intellectually.

this film is going to rug you

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>>164634112wasn't gonna

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>>164633490Also, vikings would be mostly using axes with the richest using swords. Raiders made bank and spears were for poorfags

>It's a "Writer misunderstands what a shieldmaiden is and treats them like warriors rather than a literal shieldbitch that carried an actual warrior's shield around when he wasn't fighting so his arms didn't get tired" series

>>164631582That's at least has a slight basis for a misunderstanding.

>>164631891>It's my artistic license to make my film look like shitBudgetary license, more like it.

>>164633490Actually vikings weren't poorfags most of the time, they made quite a bit of money through trade and the etc raids they performed.

>200+ movies in a year makes you a 'cineaste'isn't that a normal amount of films?

>>164635311I know people who claim to be cinephiles who watch max 30 films a year. Never underestimate how casual some film fans are. 200+ is completely out of the norm.

>>164635311Yeah that struck me as odd too. The average boomer probably watches more movies in a year than that just by spending a couple of hours a day watching TV.

>>164630098What the fuck did you expect?

>>164635311>>164635356i only watched 22 films last year and tell everyone im a cinephile. cope and seethe.

>>164635356People also underestimate just how casual most average people are towards movies

>>164633200>Eggers is the only guy putting out nothing but 10/10s nowyikes. he just makes capeshit. nothing above average.

>>164630098A historically accurate viking film would be badass.

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>>164635311It's a huge amount you fucking weirdo. I'd argue there aren't even 200 films worth watching, let alone in a single year.

>>164635356>Averaging about one film a year for the last decade or so>Probably be around 2 in the last five if I wasn't dragged along to see something I wasn't really interested in seeing.

>>164633149>>164633248Subhuman spergs

>>164635535Does rewatching movies count? OP only said "watched films"

>>164631070>Nigger in the first two minutesKek

>>164635535lol it's literally 4 movies a week.

>>164630040Fuck yeah

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I want to get hype for this, bros, but it's a CURRENT YEAR movie with an all White cast which tells me there's probably going to be horrible woke subtext going on they didn't show in the trailer because (((they))) know people hate that shit. I just don't trust any new movies anymore.

>>164632104Fuck you. This whole thread is full of anti white bullshit fuck you nigger

>>164636120>Fuck you. This whole thread is full of anti white bullshit fuck you nigger

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>>164636099I'd say an all white cast with no wokeness in the trailer is a good sign. I've never known wokeshit to try and disguise itself.>>164636120>>164636166take a screenshot of this post and then post it

>>164631886dumbass critics didnt like it but its really fucking good you will love it

There's nothing worse than Varangian Guard niggersThey were decent soldiers but the reason they were employed was because they were christian foreigners who were far removed from the political intrigue and thus could be trusted to do their job.Stop acting like they were an elite super duper loyal Avengers, they were just too ignorant to understand court intrigue so they just followed the money

>>164636188>I'd say an all white cast with no wokeness in the trailer is a good sign.Not in CURRENT YEAR.

>>164636426Name one woke movie that hid it's wokeness.


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>>164636293Shut up

>>164630778>someone who watches 200 films a year can only describe something as "the most metal movie ever made"

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>>164634441Anglo Saxon helms were coolest of all. Fight me, churl.

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>>164636909fucking normaniggers and their gay continental chivalry just had to come and ruin everything if my boy harold wasn't getting 2v1'd by the d*nes he would've wiped the floor with those cunts

>>164637221>fucking normaniggers and their gay continental chivalry just had to come and ruin everythingwhat did they ruin?

>>164636909Are you the Anglo Saxon autist from Holla Forums? Are you enjoying Elden Ring?

How do you almost pass out from watching a film. Are these people 8?

>>164634441I hate how reproductions like that always make the mask oversized, it looks cartoonish>>164633884A distinction between berserkir and úlfhednar may have existed once but the surviving Old Norse corpus (including a poem thought to be from the 10th century) seems to use the two terms interchangeably

>>164630307the only story i remember of a viking fighting without armor was Battle of Stamford Bridge where a viking army got surprise attacked and one guy decided to hold of the army on the bridge to give his comrades time to prepare for the battle.

>>164637790>he doesn't choke himself with a shoelace while watching kinoGet with the times, grandpa.

>>164636867>metalI actually have zero expectations for this movie and don't have my hopes up based on that one comment.It will probably be as bad as The Green Knight desu.

>>164636867The fact they could find 200 worthwhile movies to watch per year tells you all you need to know about them.

>It le metal!Why has this word become so reddit?

>>164632104They were but most likely they weren't warriors just an elite caste of ex-mercenaries that earned their bearpelt.

>most metalwe need to talk about heavy metal's toxic white masculinity problem

>>164630040are there really people out there that unironically call themselves "cineasts" when they watch less then 500 movies (real movies, not capeshit) per year?

I don't need reviewsI don't need opinionsI don't need ratingsI don't need awardsI don't need trailersI don't need accoladesI don't need box office figuresI don't need test audience figuresJust tell me, are there any niggers? Yes or no.

>>164637429cool helmets


>>164633391the gesta danorum is recounting a story that would have taken place around the early 7th century based on some probable historical figures mentioned (like hraerekr slongvanbaugi). just like beowulf was written down much later than its composition, based on the historical figures mentioned in it.

>>164633884>Which is not baersark... you would think you could read and understand written language, but your post proves otherwise.congrats on being a smug ignoramus

>>164636909that helmet was actually made by the pre-viking vendel people of sweden. helmet panels made from the same pressblech dies (or repousse; I forget which technique was used) have been found in the vendel and valsgarde burials near gamla uppsala. sadly, very little has been published on them in english

>>164632286Fuck you I'm cryin

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>>164632831Das rite

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>>164636909>anglo-saxonlol no, hell the snake heads on it are of same style of a pre-viking age bracelet found in Finland. And a lot of other stuff on it is the same as stuff found in pre-viking age Sweden.

>>164632286>staring dicapriokys

>>164633922>I do not support the current thing because uhhhh im a special little boy >Not a NPC btw

>>164633884Anon, I know this will likely fall on deaf ears but you should make at least a little bit of effort not to be a massive fag.

I have a viking fatigue...

sounds too good to be trueim expecting some pozzed shit in it for suremaybe some feminist bs with the ay lmao>>164636120This

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>>164638823I have no doubt reddit will get exactly what they hope for, capeshit with a slightly edgy style

>>164641221Vikings fucked everything. Bearpeople would be walking around if they had their way. Absolute coomers.

>>164642922it will be like django, a badass film on the surface pozzed in every conceivable way under the surface. this director is little more than a fraud.

>>164636120>muh poor poor whiterinosJust blow yourself up already you wh*te dog imagine being from the most privileged race in the history of this planet and complaining about anti-wh*te sentiments, you people should be beaten in the streets to give you an idea of what actualy suffering is

>>164631004Based Anglo lads killing Danish poofs

>>164641422i have been anti ukraine for years tyvm

>>164630040i am the cinestest

>>164631004I wonder what "trifles" means, tattoos or jewelry?


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>>164630040Valhalla Rising > The Northman

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>>164644198its not even out yet

>>164644390I can tell by the trailers it will be dishonest

>>164644447your a faggot

>>164630040Someone who watches 200 films a year doesn't sound like he'd have very high standards.

>>164644447Eggers have yet to make a bad or even mediocre movie. The Witch was really good, The Lighthouse was god tier.

>>164643580holly cope