Give me money I want a PS4 + GT Sport

FRIST

how do i know
do u have something in mind?

pottermore.com
"sorted"

lewd~

Nevermind email verification is too much work

I dk

A solid 12 inches of pure pleasure

lol
at least i like my harry potter stats

We're so different!!!

it is lost forever

our wands are same length!
:o

ur a healer bard!:
"Pukwudgie house is sometimes considered to represent the heart of a witch or wizard. It is also said that Pukwudgie favours healers"

spruce wand wood!:
bold spell-caster with a good sense of humour - it becomes a superb helper, intensely loyal to their owners and capable of producing particularly flamboyant and dramatic effects.

HEEEEEAAAALLLLLSSSSSLLLUUUUUUUTTTTT

...

tfw you havent' slept yet and check the time and notice the calendar says 12/4/2085 and you remember you left the oven on in 2017 while making garlic bread

u r majestic is what all that basicaly says.

garlic bread turned to ashes ;~;

you're a tank huh :3

SLYTHERIN
GROSS!

Post anime tiddies as my reward

WOW RUDE

nope
im a powerful glass cannon with ultra magics!!!
:3

...

I can't even see the anime tiddies

Too bad. i'm not the floozy you're searching for then~ :3

You aren't an anime girl

no one's an anime.

This is literally me IRL

me rn

ban looks like vinny in my head tbh

me_irl

wat vinny look like?

smol but deadly

Me currently existing in my own body

But vinny IS HOT

At least you say it ironically.

*pets explosion*

Pew pew~
u heal
i do dmg
and nezumi is the weird one xD

me existing tommorow

...

YOU DONT HAVE ANY PANTS ON

>~

...

Sometimes I get amazed by the bullshit I write that turns out to work.

[12:20:02.196] GTAVManualTransmission v4.2.0[12:20:02.196] VER_1_0_877_1_STEAM[12:20:02.197] Script loaded[12:20:03.251] Settings read[12:20:03.251] Initializing steering wheel[12:20:03.261] Found 1 device(s)[12:20:03.261] Device: Controller (XBOX 360 For Windows)[12:20:03.261] GUID: {0D50F5F0-7C13-11E4-8001-444553540000}[12:20:03.261] Initializing force feedback device[12:20:03.261] Force feedback device not found[12:20:03.261] Registered but not available: [12:20:03.261] {F69653F0-19B9-11E6-8002-444553540000}[12:20:03.261] Enumerated but not registered: (available for use in settings_wheel.ini)[12:20:03.261] {0D50F5F0-7C13-11E4-8001-444553540000}[12:20:03.261] Initialization finished

I could buy you gt

BUT FUCK THAT

me irl

Why would i wear pant in bed while waking up? ._.

photoshop ur hair head beside vinny

Buy ikt a Tokai bodypillow.

oh me gahwd

LEWD

( < ~ > )

Why a body pillow

Why not just Tokai

it's definatley cheaper
that's for sure!!!

Touche.

< ~ >

link me this harry potter thing

*yuris*

Poster below this one now has an onahole made exactly like his butthole.

If you would want to buy it, how badly you want it?

...

pic related its my buttholle

youtube.com/watch?v=tYpLDJfG05A

be warned. you have to commit to singing up to the official Pottermore.com page.
(you don't have to verify i'm sure, but i did to make it official.)

then you select the sorting tab once signed in.

and put your heart into the answers you give.

Lewd manga caps ur postign! >~

that tickles

*yuris softly and warmly*

It was supposed to be painful

...

THESE ARE THE QUESTIONS MAN MUST ANSWER

*yuris HARD*

You are doing me a frighten

u r doin meh afrighten

me frigt en

*spooks intensify*

*yuris butt*

I don't know any other flavors of yuri

Don't ask.
Don't even ask me.
You don't want to know.
You can never know.

what do you want?

make it stap

*asks*

I don't know

you on the left and me on the right

am i good enough for you?

For what ?

AM I GOOD ENOUGH?

FOR YOU

that you like having me around?

is there something i'm not good at? that you think i could be better at?

...

Fuck if I know

do whatever you want

...

I wanted to make a list of

KNOW THE DIFFERENCE
IT COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE

With a little list in my sort of humor

Bard
- Pretty Cool
- Will share a joint
- Is one with doggos
- Gives the best head pats

SCANNER
- Has no chill, tapes his shift key down for permanent cruise control
- Constantly drunk
- Is probably a cannibal

Open mouth yuri
Ass to ass yuri
Yuri in ancient ruins
Custom zombie maid yuri
Yuri for a bad time

do i do things that make you happy in some small way at the very least sometimes? ;~;
that you like me for?

DESCRIBE SCOOT

NOW

Nothing that you can change

It is my bedtime though Scoot, I need time to sleep n think.

DOOOOT DOOOOOOOOOOT

my favorite yuri is the one with the two silver haired maids in the barn

... at least i know you like me for something now at least~
i'mma just be me then

You misunderstand me Luka.

I hate everyone in one way or another.

...

I am literally perfect
what does he know

I like this particualar one with two monster girls, one a cute zombie maid and a vampire.

Leg tentacles are also involced.

I hate you less

nee nee

doople

...

Seaweed flow, must be from that weed smoke
Eyes Chinese cause we smoking sour diesel
Blunts Siamese, two of these, you be me, yo
Fuck the police though, we smoke it like it's legal

If you want me to hurt your feelings keep asking me questions.

Well, in 15 minutes... or I should NOT play dota, and that way I can be more chill playing Stardew THEN bed in like ... half an hour

Endless suffer

Eternal darkness

My eyes laid to rest

Blood Yuri
1000 Century Yuri Egg
Yuri in the deeps
The kind of yuri that you can only get in the deep dark forests of Czech Republic
Yuri bananas
I CAN GO ON

gara

......

Blegh

same

Distress.

whats wrong dooter

YURI VORE, WHERE YURI ONLY HAPPENS IN THE DARK, DANK FLESH PRISONS OF FANTASTICAL TOOTHLESS BEASTS.

Ok, I'm done.

What the fuck is this-gara ?

...

Wanted to make up random shit and adding 'yuri' to it.

Its time to go to scotland and visit Sad Ness.

babooka

*hugs*

You-gara seem very strange.

You'll get accustomed to it~

Yay! Luka alright?

Goodnight-gara

Don't wake up-gara

nanas

It bothers me how the bosses/hunts who get this song aren't very difficult for me.

...

monkey family

maybe a tad tired....

UNITY... aka U Need TEa

...

i need sweet green honey tea thats been turned cold~ Iced tea!

...

...

Go scavenge these items

the grocery store is closed at 4 in the morning...

so i can't go out and buy a 99 cent can of Arizona right now.
;~;

The struggle is real.

for now i think i'll just listen to this calming ASMR

:)

Yay!

Yay

...

Kou is best.

NANAS

ni ne

uguus

okay at least I got a laugh out of the wand part

So a big, black, hairy, flexible wand.

the best, black hairy unicorn wand. slightly flexible so it can fit into tight spaces for storage

What is this harry pothead stuff

tiny asian hands

...

...

nanas for me pwease

Neenee

tfw having to solo super londo bros

What's wrong with penn and teller?

try it at sl1

Magicians are shit.

jesse eisenberg

...

Objectively best alien.

That was different.

jesse eisenberg is micahel cera done right

:3

That pic reminds me that I need to expand my yuki nagato folder.

i think you mean illusionists, real magicians are cool, but don't exist

Movie when

All these colourful flags

Not sure if I want to play OW or Pokemon.

I like the bear.

I feel like you're less likely to regret playing Pokemon

Legit didn't even notice it

I guess I'll work on clearing all the Pokemon I can for my Dex on the first island than.

try playing "drink bleach"

Bleach is a pretty good anime

maybee tomrow

...

...

...

*pat*

u-u-uguuuuuu

*huggu*

Come fuck me daddy~

...

Wanna play some ranked?

...

I havent done placement. I'll get on that on umu

what's up you cock smokers

so starcraft is warcraft without the heroes
diablo is warcraft without the units?

Scoot, did you die?

i died ree

eating cocks.

Diablo is like league in starcraft envitorment, or well warcraft.

sounds like I nailed it tbh

Warcraft had no heroes initially.

sounds painful

YES OK

Imgith bag to go to aba

naan

Did Neru get dropped on their head when they were little?

mr sandman bring me a dream

You called?

Spagett

merry festivus friends

...

isnt chrismas still like 21 days awa y

...

yes but we need to constantly remind everyone about it every day until it actually happens

not if you are muslim

XDF52-SRR9L-T22UN

I live for this shit, no time like winter time.

Who the fuck are you?

Blood Chan

I'm Phobos, haven't posted in a while, but that's because I needed stuff to talk about. I ran out.

Wew

...

...

dod

Hey you fucks im back

...

guess who black woth a brand new wrap

...

Hows it going buddies xd

Is that Boo?
Fuck off.

Why are you being so tsun

Because you have a face only a mother could love.

Hey that wasnt nice. I have severe anxiety problems and i can barely post on this board.

Then don't.

But im lonely

Post dick

is that the troll's toll?

...

very nice cute grill

you are a very nice cute grill

komekko :3

I need to read the spin offs and stuff.

Why can't they just animate whatever I want.

reading is good too especially for the porns

hello i am cute anime girl too yes

I frustrate me ;_;

you are slut

i am only slut if i see cock

but i don't see cock

so i am not slut

do you poi on cocks

no i do not "poi" on cocks

what do you do to cocks? push your soft bits on them?

i use my mouth, mainly

HAh! are you a virgin

SO DIRTY, NEZI

stop slut shaming

Humans are dicks in general.
Dicks are another word for cock.
You see cocks every day.
You're a slut every day.
You're a slut.

Yay word math.

I'm a slut?

no

some people lock themselves up everyday and see no cocks

On paper, yeah.

...

Replace people with people that post on imageboards then.

Fuck, you got me.

I just love big vagina, it can't be helped.

DIRTY SLUT NYEH NYEHNA BOO BOO

You like throwing hotdogs down hallways?

...

puffy vulva u dweeb

also i use my hands so eventually it'd end up that way, tis the life of lesbianism

hehe xd

poor kitty

grilll?!??

OH BOI is it a good day to be alive!

Mhm.

hi

have u ever touched a vagina??????

I have.

being born into this world doesnt count

gg

Don't worry I've arrived-gara.

Why the fuck doesn't anybody seem to do shit with DirectInput force feedback in C++

I can't the the only dude who's doing this shit.

so u kno how loosey goosey a good happy puss can get

Wow.
Dead community much?

...

Dead on the outside and the inside.

hi ian

8ft under, too

...

Under what ?

I hope its Darwins feet.

n-negh

oh my god what is this bull shit

Hello

bad fetish

>//////////////////////////////

...

Degenerate

...

Regenerate.

Pregenerate.

Co-generate.

Generate

am I gergnate ?

pregananrate

howyadoin
do you wanna play league with me
do you even play league anymore

Fine

Not right now

Yes, playing DS3 atm tho

invite me plz ;~;

:(
i miss playing video games with you ya big fag
what console are you on?

Do you own a PS4?

See above

"Let's make an API where people can access their game input devices in all kinds of way and also make way for advanced force feedback and other cool stuff!"
- Microsoft

"Let's overcomplicate a simple thing by making all kinds of bullshit around it for which you do not need shit and let's absolutely NOT document how this shit works or is to be used!"
- Also Microsoft

"You know what that shit was too complicated let's only give support for the Xbox 360 controller also fuck force feedback and push DirectInput into legacy life support!"
- Also Microsoft

"Oh fuck people still play sims and shit I guess we're stuck now, hey you guys using wheels and joysticks use the old API also figure it out yourself idek"
- Also Microsoft

"Oh fuck how does this shit work I just wanna make games lets just not support wheel in Forza Apex"
- Also Microsoft

"Ghahahaha people are upset let's implement some sort of force feedback using vendor APIs instead of upgrading XInput or simplifying DirectInput"
- Also Microsoft

"Wow fuck this DirectInput shit I'm gonna use not C++ and just use this cool lib"
- Everybody indie/hobby

Fucking hell

k

Hi Ian

only a ded ps3 sadly.

Hi

...

Meow.

Sup, diggy?

You should make gypsy babies with Jacky.

Nerd vidya gaems, you?

Why gypsy babies?

Ooh. Did my hair and makeup and waiting to hear back from my friend to hang out.

Alternatively: Eating chips and salsa :p

What game?

8 foot pussy

dang it
I own the game on PC and Xbone but I don't have a PS4
Did you finish Bloodborne already?

HI DADDY!!!

ohio~

These all sound like excellent ideas. I'm playing Dark Souls 3, trying a sorcery build

Nah.

He's a gypsy.

what can we do together?

Those are slavs, right?
I wasn't born in that area, but that's where the majority of my ancestry is.

I'll oh hi your oh.

NOTHING.

Still, this is not a bad thing

Uhh... too many to count, lol. The bosses are MUCH easier, tho.

Nah, they're curries that fled India ages ago and spread like cockroaches throughout the near east and Europe.

whattup cutie booty

I could slav squat on his junk.

;~;

I was hoping to get baked though cause it's hilarious when a stoned tranny goes into the pharmacy to renew her scripts :p

Oh, they don't have the special resistance yet?

Not a whole lot. Painted my nails and stuff~

Did you have much of a hangover this morning?

I don't even know why slav squatting is even a thing but sometimes it's best to not know these things.

A little bit, atleast beer doesnt make me spew.
If it was vodka then I probably would ahve been holed up all day.
Woo woo
going somewhere?

strawpoll.me/11800715
strawpoll.me/11800715
strawpoll.me/11800715
strawpoll.me/11800715
strawpoll.me/11800715
strawpoll.me/11800715

What's so funny about this?

How to tell a bothersome group member that they need to shut up and understand that they're stupid without sounding mean?

We're just going to do this (drop it) for now, if you wanna discuss it more later than we can talk about it then.

Just say it bluntly. It's what I do. Then again, I'm always the "group leader" in projects so it works out.

vodka... slut potion~

I was, but now I'm not. My cute is going to waste :(

I was poking fun at myself.

You don't have weed? I thought you'd always have some just in case

Some do, but it's like... you don't need to get in close, just wait for their big sweeping attacks and fire shit at them after

tell them their wrong

Fair enough.

...

I'd tell that loathsome member that they're wrong, but apparently 5/6 people say they're in the right.

I haven't had any of my own since like August. I even threw my bong away when I moved lol I was assuming those are recyclable anyway lmao

Oh yeah, the repetitive sweep attacks :p

That's what I thought.

I was the 1/6

passive aggressive strawpolling lol

lol

This was our solution for now, but deadline is coming up and he is adamant that it needs to go in the report.

Being blunt doesn't work if you can't convince them your arguments are stronger, more well documented and reasonable than theirs.

See above

hahahahah slut potion!

and your cute is never wasted, its been practice time atleast

That's true... Practicing for daddy

I think that falls into the second option anyway.

I don't vote in my own polls anymore, tbh.

What can I say, I'm Canadian.
Passive Aggression is basically my only inheritable trait.

I didn't even realize you guys still did strawpolls lol

Then it goes in the report, along with a comment that there was dissent within the group or such, to demonstrate that not everyone was on board.

Nice loli!

defeat their misguided ways one by one one on one at a later time, to win them over with your opinions in the long term.

Mine are pretty much all asinine shiptoasting, or blatant passive aggression.

Odd.
I usually just take the helm and be the one delegating tasks and choosing the direction of the project to begin with.
It usually works out to having to do less, too.

Nice, I guess :p

For shame, for shame

uguuuuu ^^ good girl

"Look, [you've been/your work has been] [saying/doing/writing] [thing], which we [tested/verified/checked] and it was [not optimal/not the solution/euphemism for bad], so we needed to fix it which took time so it'd be better if you did that differently so for now you're gonna do [irrelevant task]"

Yeah we might end up having to do that. It is a group exam based on written product, so that should initiate some discussion I guess

Standard loli I think

He is too stubborn, we have tried.

The course interests me too little to bother with more effort than writing the final report. Much less so the direction of the project, I just need it to be over with.

Yes, we did similar to no effect. That is the problem.

even as just you and him one on one?
talking seriously to eachother, without the others around?

Mornin'
Quick question:
Starting pushups. Someone told me to do 4 reps with 2-minute breaks in between.
How many push-ups in a 'rep'?

One.

How is that shameful?

N-nyaaaa

do 10 at a time and make sure theyre proper

one rep of 4 is 4
two reps of 4 is 8

idk loli is good

"You haven't improved on [thing] since last time, stop that."

"You've been ignoring our direct feedback and we're concerned."

Meeting with whoever is authoritative enough to acknowledge that [person] is gonna get kicked out.

That's too much!

Alright. Cheers.

He probably meant something like Maddie said, with 4 sets of 10.

Fort getting swole

You're disobeying Snoop's 1 commandment

8-12.

I gave up trying. I'll let the group do what they want with him.

I regret not asking earlier and doing 15 the first time.
I couldn't get past 8 the second time..
I'm fuckin' panting.

They said every other day. Should I do it every day or, as they said, every 2?

Less wimpy is my goal.

8... sounds good right now.

Wouldn't that be a set?

Every second.
Don't work the same muscle groups two days in a row, always give them time to recover.

What can I do the other day?
I just want to look less wimpy. My arms are sticks and my belly is.. there's just nothing there.

:c

First of all, they were Biggie's commandments so gtfo

Sit-ups probably.
Should I do that the same day, or the day I'm not doing push-ups?

Cardio?

:D

cute patoot

I mixed them up, I wouldn't advice you going for 8x10 pushups every second day. That's fairly ambitious. You should combine the push ups with some running if you're serious about it.

Yeah I mixed it up.

Well, you don't want to do either two days in a row.

To be fair, his friend probably meant sets, so you weren't far off base.

West coast best coast.

Good! What I/we did was just ignore and let the results/contributions speak for themselves.

Also I've been told I was good at crisis management for project groups.

I have spaghetti arms

meow ;~;

I could not complete my 4th rep? set? One of those.
I just laid down on the floor. Feeling true humility.
That'll be my driving force.

GOtta google that.

What'd you mix it up with?

Alrighty.

post moar bakuhatsu loli

Cardio would basically be jogging every off day.

I consider myself very patient but when he refuses to see logic when I present him with sound evidence that he is wrong, I just drop everything and do my own thing.

Reps and sets. Reps are how many times you repeat the set. The set is how many times you do the exercise, in this case pushups. For dumbbells, it would be how many times you raise and lower them.

I generally dislike sounding like a /fit/fag so I'll just stop here.

but i only post explosion loli how can i post more

I'm back now!

How many did you do?

Huzza.

*squirt bottles*

Ahh, alright. What does that improve?

Hehe, sorry.
THanks though.

15-8-8-6
I failed

If things like that can't be solved internally, you'd want to get a supervisor or something involved.

at least you are here
:)

Huh, how deep are your push ups? Chest-ground?

hey thats borderline lood and just keeep posting

You have them mixed up again.
Reps are how many times you repeat the exercise, sets are groups of reps.

General fitness, heart health.

any exercise would probably make fortune turn inside out. he's like 90 lbs ffs

I don't save distasteful lewd stuff.

...

Good night

That's my que to fuck off to bed. I can't think anymore.

Fortune needs to start taking 'roids.

Night

Yes.

My heart is fine. General fitness is never wrong though.

I am so tired yo.

nini

Keep at it! Any start is good, just keep doing it and it'll become easier with time.

*pat*

protein shakes

do you do cummies for gummin

Protein snakes.

...

...

You what now?

Don't like the sound of that.

Yus

or just eat fast food everyday and play pokemon moon 24/7

...

No roids.
Improvement needs to come from effort.

Buy a racing wheel with strong force feedback and play DiRT Rally 24/7

Gotta ask.
Pushups&Situps every other day on the same day.
Jogging/cardio every OTHER other day.

secret lives of pets was kinda overrated but i kinda enjoy those 80 minute pixar movies no matter what happens

...

How do you do cardio anyway

The effort will come from your shrunken testicles and bitch tits.

>_

...

Fuck I forgot to ask the question.

Is a good idea?

wat even

ride a damn bike

it was a nice movie

or swin

swim*

Seen it with my sisters.
It was enjoyable, not much more.

kevin hart's only good role tbh

it's funny how even by voice, i confused lake bell for zooey dechenel

I like slouch Kumiko.

Fort, seriously. Don't ask a bunch of vidya nerds how to set up your work out routine.

the rabbit was kinda funny, but eh...

HAHA RIGHT? ITS LIKE ASKING A BUNCH OF ANIMU POSTERS ABOUT FASHION TIPS

Racing wheel is a good upper arms workout

when he dropped the pellets i was like teehee

you know toad slime

no

at least it was a happy ending.

...

they're always happy endings. that's why they are so reliable. 80 minutes of escaping our miserable existences

I drink juicy juice now :p

My favourite cardio is whacking off

Megumin is not for lewd.

who would want to lewd something with such nonexistent tits?

i waiting for Passengers now.

Like juice boxes?
Do you even squish them them in your hands when done to show how strong you are?

what's that? a movie about pigeons? would watch/10

No, I get the gallon jugs of them.

aqua is trash and megu is lewd goddess

...

hurrah!

-boops ur nose-

Later Gators

...

nini

where else tho
I refuse to get near /fit/

bye daddy

:)

There are websites other than chans you know.

ooooh that movie. yeah i'll probably wait for stream

if you really want a good workout just edge for a while without climaxing and go ham on a punching bag

...no way, right?
Does it matter, though? At least it might get some conversation going that goes further than 'how are you?'

edging is the worst

:c
aww ok

i mean unless someone wants to buy me a ticket to see it in the theatre. i'll watch literally anything in the theatre

I do kinda want one. Haven't thought of that in a while. Couldn't really do it well in old room, but my new room is perfect for one.

...

...

Do what thou wilt.

imagining fots' skeleton ass training in his attic with a punching bag is a funny image

Shall be the whole of the law

Okay. Gonna get a punching bag
Any volunteers?

punch mah balls please

...

Luka.

*explodes into the night*

sayonara suckaaaaas

or you could get a 100 kilo sand bag

stay exploded

...

Hm?

...

bye big dick

Luka, be my punching bag.
Don't worry, I couldn't hurt you if I tried.

I died once and got an S-

._.

ouch!

Oh no, however will you explain your shame to your family

luka absorbs blows and transforms them into meows

...

meow

Sticks for bones and can't throw stones.
Words hurt.

Just came in but as a heads up 100 kg is probably just light for kicking. 125 would be better, 250+ pounds is a good heavy bag,

what happens if blowjob

nyaajob?

I'm not sure how much I want to hang on my ceiling.
Or how much I want to carry up the stairs, in the 250+ case.
But I guess that's training too.

desu

...

Ceiling could be a worry. If you're not kicking you also don't need that kinda weight unless you're Mike Tyson status. But kicking a 100 kg bag it'll probably be just on the light side.

I am the weakest. I am seriously very weak.
100-150 would do for me then.Thanks yo!

someone livestream the walking dead

shit is about to get real

i am walking dead on the inside

This is the time it comes on? nice.
I'm an epi behind tho

Mhmm. Learn how to punch properly and/or how to wrap your wrists to prevent injury. You don't need wraps if you punch right, but backup precautions are good. Also without any gloves you'll tear skin off, so something is nice.

rick and negan eventually work together against the whisperers

I've got like 4 pair of gloves. I'll use two pair.
I think I can punch properly, but will look it up to make sure.

...

...

...

hi neru

You-gara

...

...

ap rammus top going off

New.