Some of you guys are alright. Don't go to Holla Forums tomorrow if you're on the internet

I play dota too and overwatch as well hit me up

steamcommunity.com/id/spooooooooooooookyy

weedlord560

Well it could end up hurting a lot if you think about it

Will do

I'm sure there's some sort of science behind it regarding audio compression but it's kind of weird since my grandparents still have issues realizing it's me if I'm the one calling them.

No more gay.

...

Well good.

...

...

...

Hi, Mandy~!

Not if you just do it right.

Who's saying I would?

This means were best friends !

Hello, brightlord. How goes your day?

That was easier than expected

Hi, Squash~

Very well.
My lay for the night canceled though.

Me, clearly

I call them to sporadically since I'm not a horrible person and occasionally take them to doctors' appointments.

Cute.

Hi Elma~

...

OMG YOU TILDED ME AND EVERYTHING!??!

So will our dota games

I-I mean.. Hi~

Your lay for the night, eh?

What mmr are you?

Yes?

I think that's just called common courtesy.

The dog's owner had plans and couldn't bring him by to Squash.

I was hoping to have some fun, but I guess not.
I am pent up and need one good night of relentless fucking.

you first

...

...

Well that is a shame. Got any other plans?

I don't think a ferret with a dildo is enough to please him.

I think I was at about 3900 or something, and I'm probably worse than that now since I've not been playing much at all

Iunno. I never really had a relationship with any of my grandparents and they're all pretty much dying out now.

Two of the four are already dead and the other two are probably going to be dead soon.
It doesn't really cost much effort to just speak with them or do an errand occasionally.

It's like the minimal amount of effort to not be a shitty person.

Not unless you care to fill them.

play dota wif me

I'd probably be down some time

Don't do it.
He's truly awful.

I was 3.3k then I threw and tilted !

...

I couldn't possibly help if I wanted to. I don't know where 2/3 remaining gparents live let alone their phone numbers and the other one is a state away so helping with errands or hospital trips are an impossibility.

It's not like anyone helps me with my bullshit and I'm assuming they sleep fine at night *shrugs*

I don't think that I can though.

Miss Cakes.

A lot of my friends are to be fair

I started 3900, went up a bit, then down a bit, then never played ranked again

I don't play too seriously I hope you're ok with that

It's ok. I ask you to do too much.

It's not about "fixing" or "helping" anything. It's more about just calling to let them know they mattered at all. Old family members know they're old and that they're dying. They don't want hollow promises nor do they really want perpetual nostalgia about time with them. All they really want is the smallest amount of time to know they somehow mattered to their family and that's like a few minute phone call once in a blue moon.

miss mandy.

game

That's fine, I'm happy as long as I have the opportunity to kill enemies

told ya I'd get plat tho

Oh hush, no you don't.

My Cakes?

nice. good job, jack.

I belong to everyone, mandy. the world's way of saying "fuck you, everyone else"

Mandy, you spoil me.
I hope you know that.

I'll fuck it up to gold anyway but at least I had it
thx

>Jack spends a lot of time being a cum dumpster heal slut

Sugoi sugoi

I'm not on though !

They don't pick supports, the pricks
I'm forced

nah man, you can't fail out of your rank unless you are master or grandmaster. you'll be plat for the rest of the season even if you lose literally every match from now on.

test

>Jack is forced to be a heal slut

lucky bastard

Forgive me, that was supposed to be Mr cakes? Not sure your gender, actually. But I will accept you being mine, sweatie.

Oh I do no such thing, my love, though you would deserve it.

...

I am a male, but do not really care what gender I am addressed by, especially not by people over the internet. you aren't the only person to call me "miss" and it never bothers me.

I think squash would be upset if you were to try and claim me before him.

Oh hush, you~!
Keep talking that way and I might be under your thumb.

Mandy can have who ever makes him happy.
As long as he's happy.

That came out a bit too gay.

you are adorable.

Oh I thought you lose ranks too
Thats cool then

Exactly.

...

C U C K
U
C
K

nop. you're going to be able to brag about hitting plat forever. it would be cool to hit that, but I don't think our current gameplan of losing 70% of matches is going to get us there.

but we sure have fun, gosh darn it.

I hope Smiles spanks you like the little shit you are.

But I am just an idea, really. Hopefully, the embodiment of kindness and love. And drunkenenss at times.

I don't think being under my thumb is your goal...

cupcake ill help you win ^^

There's no way that's a real fetish.

I simply strive for your attention and affection.
Simply to have that sets my heart aglow.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Erotic_spanking

L O L
O
L

I'm sure you will.

well you're doing a super job, sport.

are you kidding? it absolutely is. I've said multiple times it's one of my all time favorites.

I refuse to believe this is real.

I don't want to lose what already little faith I have in humanity.

hey squash.

guess what.

mandy and I live super close to each other.

once my ex dislocated his shoulder trying to spank me hard enough. it still wasn't hard enough

...

You would never have to strive for what you have, dear.

Hopefully it doesn't end badly again though.

he could bike over right now and be here in less than an hour.

I'd love to offer some words of encouragement, but as nearly everything ends poorly for me, I can't really speak from experience.

I hope the next time somehow ends with your disc completely rupturing and you left as a soulless husk who cannot even feel anything in his lower body.

Last time I was worried about hitting plat in something,
the game had the worst fucking netcode ever and because my ping was higher than every other PVPer, and kept getting matched with parries, which meant I got fucked by latency every match I was given.

I almost had a stress induced breakdown one day it was so bad.

...

okie dokie.

Nice poetry fag.

ProbablAnd y more like 30 minutes. A bike can get into some tight spaces.

And I know how that goes far too well...

Part of me gets really worried that if you see me being mean to people then you'll get angry with me so I try to be on my best behavior when you're around.

Mmmmmmm....

Please.

sucks to suck doesn't it

so what movie should I get ready to go?

don't worry, I'll be gentle with him.

I am not sure why I feel so nervous about this.

Lenko can tell you all about it.

s a v a g e

...

With the flow of recent posts and the next two reactions I can tell it was that loser kyle who said something.

lmao

Lenko, tell me all about it.

Oh, Ollie.

...

Nobody can be nice to everybody. Just yesterday I was being quite mean to a fellow employee. We both moved up to the same position at the same time, but I've been in the company longer. It was by choice not to move up sooner, by the way. Anyway, I was giving him a ton of shit yesterday because of the little things he screwed up. It was great. Another older guy was joining in, calling him Peter Griffin. Good times.

Maybe a sappy romance movie? I love PS I love you...

Why would you feel nervous about a good love making session?

Maybe not.
With a nose like his I'm sure he can smell me a mile away.

Well you see there is this really lanky gfur poster that has no life or stable home and he's quite jealous of me. That or he has nothing better to do and I will assume the latter.

You're a card.
And jealousy?

I just want to point out.

Filtering doesn't hide names.
It only hides the post body.

So if he'd actually filtered you, he'd still see your name.

That's it?

I'll take lanky to vertically stunted.

romance movies are alright I guess. I like me some comedy. perhaps we could meet in the middle with a rom com. snuggle up and watch it together on my wonderful couch.

haha

detective rin on the case.

...

...

I'd rather not dwell on something that does not even need my attention. Sup with you?

I'm a card?

And what is jealousy?

Sounds good to me! I am actually watching The Dark Knight. That is like a romantic comedy, right?

It's not even a hard test to do.

It's literally how I've known every "filter" to go down in threads has been utter bullshit.

How tall are you, Lenko?

Cups proximity to you.

...

the most hilariously romantic movie of all time, really.

that's it. I'm filtering you.

5'9.5 ish

Not a whole lot. I think I may have accidentally gone full time today.

Now ask him how long his nose is.

OH, you were calling Squash short?

I'm confused.

Oh no.
However will you know when I talk about you, or respond sarcastically to your posts that I very clearly have the courage to link if you cannot see my name through your filters?

I hope Lenko hits me with another zinger.
Gets me hard.

What do you mean?
And no "lanky" does not refer to height.

can't even see your post lol cuz you're so filtered.

I cannot see Cupcake's post because I filtered him.

But I can't help that!

I want to be Ledger's Joker for halloween....

Y-you're a stupid face!
And I bet you're fat!

D-do you even have a p-p-p-p-pe-

Y-you're a stupid face!
And I bet you're fat!

D-do you even have a p-p-p-p-pe-

xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

He use to come into calls and announce he filtered the furies.
Like, had to make a huge point of it.

HA!

I'll be as fat as you want me to be.

...

...

We've all come to accept Squash's atrocious English.

Me and Luke in calls.

...

Nigga I missed one letter.

what year did the dark knight come out again? that year just called and said it wants literally everyone's halloween costume idea from that year back.

this actually kind of hurt my feelings.

HOW WILL THEY KNOW YOU ARE IGNORING THEM IF YOU DON'T LOUDLY ANNOUNCE IT YOU FAGGOT

FILTERED

hop on discord

His ego is so delicate.
We need to know how manly he is.

"so I can tell you about how I'm filtering squash"

Careful, Bebo.
Before he filters you.

#masculinitysofragile

#toxicmasculinity

YOUR SPELLING USED TO BE CALLED OUT ALMOST EVERY POST AND NOW IT'S JUST BEING A DEAD HORSE.

He's adorable.
Like a little manlet of hate.

how'd you know

...

FUCK. IT'S CONTAGIOUS.

What? Are you telling me I can't do that?!? I refuse to do the new fucker's Joker! Don't make me go old school comic book Joker!

...

Move closer to me.

Stop being fucking retarded.

lucky guess

you're adorable. you and mandy.

well it's been long enough it would actually be quite an original idea. no one would be doing it especially with the new joker for every 15 year old to dress as.

...

...

get out of my head cupcake you fucking nigger

You should spank him for his mistake.

*Twiddles thumbs*

in a few

...

no. it's very comfy here.

LoL one character and you have to filter me again.

they're both so dumb. that's how you know they're just right for each other.

You're right, I went too far, I'm sorry.

...

Manlet thread.

This is Sci tier.
You're better than this.

Today I was feeling mega dysphoric today so I did a bunch of stuff to feel better and ended up just walking around and going to get Chinese and the corner store and stuff as girly Elma which was phenomenal and I didn't get murdered or anything so Iunno. I definitely broke down some walls that were holding me back from keeping it like this permanently. Definitely helps that my dad's been cool and doesn't like hate me or anything too. That was a huge mental block to hurdle over so I think I'm like good to go now.

#blog

Also,

you are forgiven. but it still stings.

Maybe I should proxy so he has to filter that.

That was just because I didn't see him posting to see the "tank" part of his name. People were just referring to him as Bamboo.

But I can't move....

I honestly haven't decided which. But my face and everything would lend itself more to Ledger's joker. I don't have that long, narrow face for the comic book.

Oh please. I lack the dedication.
I can go maybe a thread at most before I get bored.

You could move in with me once I get my own place.

Thank God women are retarded.

I know this is like, "everyone's" opinion, but ledger was very much my favorite live action joker.

This is only per thread. At least if they keep using the same name or just keep adding letters you can kill it all off forever with one filter

Well, fuck.
It's like you want me to kiss it better.
And by kiss, I mean suck.
And by it, I mean your dick.

But my job....

He got into character very well. Nicholson's Joker never felt right to me.

At least wait until Tokai passes out drunk again.

You can work with me at the factory in town.
11.50 an hour.

Slightly less retarded than you.

this escalated very quickly from the hug I was trying to bait out.

I need to rewatch that one. it's been ages since I've seen the tim burton batman.

anyone else just wanna fuck a goat

setting the bar high as always, eh, smiles?

Goats you say?

You really set the bar high there.

Oh god damn it.

Tokai went to sleep a while ago.

Oh, hug.

I don't think I have any hug images offhand, how about headpats?

But I make 16.60 an hour.....with tons of overtime.

Yeah I was actually thinking the same thing awhile ago. Might do that sometime.

I honestly ship Smiles and Gilligan so hard.
I hope it works out and they have little babies and they post here so 'ol uncle Squash can tell them the tales of yore.

:3

But do you get backrubs?
I can give you those.

that would suffice, I suppose.

Well I know good and well that I'm the one settling in this relationship.

Try not copying Cuppers for your retorts.

see

let's watch it together at my place while we tell squash about how we keep inching closer and closer to each other.

...

love you too.

oh smiles, you're both kind of settling.

...

...

Try not sucking literally any dick you come across.

teehee

Having a good day?

it has been decidedly bleh. like almost every day for me. I like bleh a lot more than the other option.

Mandy make him stop.
He's teasing me.

I haven't had a backrub in ages...

Sure, I will head over here in a minute. Mind if we shower first though?

of course. mine is big enough for two people, I've tested that many times already.

Don't you start with me, Cuppers. I'm being objective.

I think you're projecting a bit.

...

Could be a reason for that.
Do you have anything planned this weekend?

yeah man goat bois get me off real good

Ian

so am I. he's settling because you are a woman, you're settling because of literally everything else.

CUPCAKE

But...but...

Shame. I was hoping for more...close quarters.

I'm sorry, my love. I am cruel at times.

I'll literally never be able to measure up to a man.

the reason is because my life is shit.
no, not really. just drinking and threading and watching netflix.

how are you doing?

yes? oh. you people are so fucking needy.

gotta get that penis.
it's tsuchi's favorite.

well it's not like it's a palace shower or anything. it would be a snug fit.

It's fine.
I shouldn't be jealous like this.

You two have fun. I am not sure why I am getting this in a tizzy.

Oh, I'll show you a snug fit...

Don't worry, bright lord. I'm not going to his place tonight. I just like teasing you a bit.

Fine, a bit bored. I just wanted to drop in and see how you were doing. I went for a beer, spoke Chinese to some guy and watched a movie. Wondering if I should play World of Warplanes with Test-kun.

Hello !? Someone !? I wanna play video games !

Sorry. It's not often I actually feel like this.
I shouldn't.
You two should hang sometime.

oh my.

sounds like a pretty fun day. I think we're going to be watching a movie here, actually.

...

I was going to watch a movie with Cup and Squash.

What movie?

....i don't actually have the game.

Shush, you are fine. Don't worry about it.

"oh brother where art thou?"

lewd.

I'll find someone for tsuchi to enjoy.

Oh shit, Irish long time no see.

What's good~?

you're too good to him.

Just find a good trap so he can deny his homosexuality.

It's free.

Also I think more people play War Thunder anyway.

Made you smirk.

Not my cup of tea.
i'll this time.

New phone, who dis?

you did indeed.

alright, perhaps the next time, if this becomes a common thing.

it's rin.

...

It doesn't model the planes accurately. Thus, as a true plane connoisseur I cannot play either games.

Yeah, but that's probably just because World of Warplanes is too arcade.

Oh back to the tildes~~~~
Well I've been working towards improving my personal life. Also a ton of community service. What about yourself?

I try. What sort of person would I be if I wasn't.

Brilliant.

Did you watch the Lobster?
I think you may enjoy it.

...

never even heard of it.

I dunno. what kind of person would you be, smiles?

It's like an autistic zoo, but for apple fans.

So an autistic zoo. :^)

think Isle of Dr.Monroe for singles.

Imagine if Alice, or MGD were birds? :^)

very clever

rin on fireee

~TILDES ALL DAY ERRYDAY~

I've been alright. Just been at the grind with work, watching everyone freaking out from muh hurricanes.

Basically spent the past two days drinking and playing vidya gaymes.

Living the dream~

I haven't seen that either.

if you were inevitably turned into an animal; what animal would it be?

probably a cat. housecat.

Don't be a Chinese house cat~

A sad lonely Smiles.

Oh sounds great! You haven't lost power or anything obviously, so it might as well be days off.

N-nyaawn

I would never do something so horrible.

I'm sure you'd find a way to carry on.

I'm shocked my power hasn't gone out literally at all. I live on the shittiest powergrid in the city lmao

So what kinda community shenanigans were you up to?

The amount of self-loathing that you're extruding is going to consume you until you reinvent yourself into a stepford wife. It's like watching one of those surreal movies about someone having a existential crisis.

中国猫猫~

why do people insist on doing this? I'm not looking it up!

you guys have a good night

rip bamboo

hey bambltnmk have you seen a guy named bambootank around?

goodnight.

Mandarin isn't all that hard.
It's like English without future/past or present tense~

everything that takes effort is too hard for me.

Wo bu hui shuo zhong guo hua.

At first I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side
But then I spent so many nights thinking how you did me wrong

Same old same old.
You know me, I'm like a fly on the wall.

Who are you talking to?

you're pretty cute sometimes.

Watch out for stray flyswatters~

Oh please~

我会一点儿说中文。

that wasn't really a joke.

Am I not allowed to be cryptic?
Certainly a sad day when you deny someone their crypticness.

Fuck, I don't remember the tones.
That's literally all I know and I don't even know if I'm remembering right.

I tried to teach myself how to say I don't speak it so I could respond to people talking to me when I have a chinese name up.

So, uh...
Wo bu hui shuo zhong guo hua.

How do I even get hair drillz like that?

I don't think those are even possibru

What happened to your autistic meltdown of "im filtering everyone"?

Well then.
I can't seem to think of anything....

like 99% of anime hair styles are not possible.

thinking is a waste of time anyway.

And so your back~! From outer space!
I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face.

I love that song lol
Thanks

I don't filter people.
I thought it would be funny to see people reply when they were told that they were filtered.

it's a pretty iconic song, that's for sure. not a huge fan of disco type music though.

Don't worry, if it's me with that swatter I wouldn't hit you.

Mainly since I suck at hitting things

Classy.

Needs a bit of work.
So, 不是 “我不会说中国话”。
你说”我不懂中文“。

WHEN UR MOM GETS TENDIES THAT AREN'T DINOSAUR SHAPED

evenin lads

Dream hair status: crushed.

...

That much product and irons to get that kind of curls would just make your hair fall out.

It's technically bed time but I don't wanna sleeps yet.

Can I ask for that in pinyin?
Ideally with numerals instead of tone marks?

poor maddie.

Okay, try this one.
We all sit down at a banquet of our consequences.
I think I like that one the most. But then again I come up seemingly better ones every now and then.

You still need to practice on that.
Anyways, I'm replying to you so it's a moot point.

...

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wo3 bu4 dong4 zhong1 wen2
Basically, I don't understand mandarin.

My curls were in there pretty good. I should have asked for hair drills.

I use marshmallows as curlers haha