AssAss Tity

Fuck my fucking life I just wanna bask in how motherfucking cool it is to be in Ancient Egypt goddamn but this is so going to get shit on

No. No they weren't. Isometric strategy/god games do not give you the feel of living in a glorious empire.

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Hi, shill.

But it was user.

Nice dubs thread OP.

Ancient Egyptians were white, the Founding Fathers used pyramid symbols for a reason.

It's not out yet, you're assuming an awful lot. Go away

Why bother when Ubisoft isn't going to put in any cute Egyptian girls in it?

It will deserve to be shit on, just like the previous asscreeds. The story in these games is always garbage. The characters forgettable. The moment they abandoned the modern story is when this series died. You can enjoy running around in the setting, but that might be the only thing that has half a chance at being decent.

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Is it possible to be any more plebeian?

Yeah, but that doesn't make it good.

ftfy

Why are they white?

WWW WWW EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
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I do it for free tho


Too cartoony, though. Reminds me of Sierra's The Hobbit for some reason. Still, I'll play it, I'm addicted to all things Egyptian


I'm assuming there's a massive Egyptian Empire I get to splore with a bigass snek and maybe some Ancient Stargate Gods, that's it


How do you do buttsex with a Naga anyways?


You are literally the first person I have ever seen praise the Desmond Miles story.

I fucking live you for that user, the modern day stuff was what made it exceptional.

However, seeing how Blume from Watch Dogs is a subsidiary of Abstergo, was the satellite you hack in Watch Dogs 2 the same one talked about in Vidic's emails from AssCreed 1?


Oh boy. It's top down.


They're good games, but they're not immersive. I wanna soak up that grand, glorious scale of an Empire in it's prime - it's hard to do that from the sky.

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why do you care so much about what Holla Forums thinks
play what you want. why does it need to be Holla Forums approved before you can play it?

Well you're not going to get it, because a KANGZ Egypt isn't fucking Egypt.

Egypt is kinda cool, though. Reminder that we live on the timeline that didn't even get any decent Stargate games.

>Asscreed WE WUZ KANGZ edition already being shilled.

I want to kill all marketers.

This. OP is a faggot for telling us that he's going to buy shit and wanting us to buy it too instead of just enjoying it on his own.
Literally a shill.

Correct me if my memory is just shit, but there WERE Romans in this, right? So this is supposed to be Egypt after it was conquered by the Archaemenid Empire, then conquered by Alexander the Great, and then finally coming under Roman rule around 30 B.C.

Why in the fuck is everyone Black. It's amazing considering that Egypt under Rome was pretty diverse, but in Ubi's grand blunder to try and make something that was already diverse more diverse, they've inaccurately killed off the diversity that actually existed there.

Bravo

I loved Ass Creed 1.

I liked Ass Creed 2 and Brotherhood.

I thought Revelations was ok.

I fucking hated III.

IV was ok.

Didn't play the rest, didn't even buy IV. But I'm not seeing this as an AssCreed game, I'm seeing it as a motherfucking Ancient Egypt game.

I am sick and fucking tired of fantasy games taking place in medieval woodlands, and I'm hoping this does well so that we can hopefully see more fantasy games set in Ancient Egypt, and maybe, just maybe, more Prince of Persia.

I'm not shilling this because it's assCreed, I'm shilling it because it's motherfucking Egypt son

Fixed.

I'm not going to buy it though. I stopped buying AAA games years ago.

You think Assassin's Creed games would be good if Ubisoft didn't force the brand onto the franchise's games starting from Black Flag?

If I could land a job where all I had to do was shitpost all day, I so would.

But no, I work as a cashier. I'm living the high life dealing with geriatrics who butt in line, yell at you because of corporate controlled prices and then don't even know how to use a fucking credit card, then make me call the manager because I wouldn't give them a senior discount, even though we don't give senior discounts and every fucking time they come back it's the same shit every time. Life is swell for me.

Before we hit maximum wewuzery

Then why the fuck are you making a thread about it? Did you just word the OP wrong or something? Did you mean to say "Why can't a good modern game let me explore Ancient Egypt?"

It'll probably be a fun game to pirate and I'm not going to care about the Egyptians having dark skin unless they're actually niggers. Being out in the sun that much will darken your skin. If they try to claim they're Africans or some shit though that'd be laughable.

It won't be historical accurate, and it'll just be
And it seems like the game will about freeing the slaves and overthrowing the good egyptian rulers.

Well at least you're being forthright.

Hey, technically speaking Nubians destabilized Egypt for a short period

so there were "Kangz", they just stole the crown

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Nubians were a mistake

Come to think of it, I'm kinda surprised that there hasn't been a parody Kangz Quest game yet.

(checked)
Another good option would be to make a game about the holocaust, but focused entirely on blacks. See how the Jew handles being written out of history.

My kang from another dynasty.


I'd kill for a Egyptian themed Vanillaware game.

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Japs have the weirdest fetishes.

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F𝔘ℭ𝔎 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐆𝐄𝐑𝐒

Abyssinian architecture is comfy tho.

Just retcon them into all being Sephardic Jews or Ethiopian Jews or Abayudaya or something instead of Ashkenazi.

You don't belong on Holla Forums.

Ironically, he won't give a shit what YOU think.
𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄❟ 𝐈𝐒𝐍❜𝐓 𝐈𝐓❗❓

fixed that for you

Assassin's Creed is recycled trash just with a different coat of paint each time.

Honestly, the protagonist doesn't even look that black. It's not like it's all that surprising either. AssCreed has always had protagonists with inconsistent ethnic make-ups. Hell, the first one was a Muslim.

Anyways, the games often do excellent recreations of past societies, but it's obvious that the new AssCreed is not going to be remotely fun. That sucks because all that work is forever going to be trapped in a shit game.

This.

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WE

I'm expecting him at the most to be some kind of mixed. They'll cover all bases just to be on the safe side.

There is literally nothing wrong with pirating vidya, schlomo

When the fuck did i ever say pirating is bad? Im calling out the op fot shilling a shitty ubisoft game, goon.

DENTAL PLAN

Play Powerslave, much less pro pedo "everything is permitted" bullshit and other such cuckery and revisionism.

If you don't have the freedom to do whatever you want, then you've been cucked by society :^)

Advocating for the piracy of games that aren't worth paying for is not shilling

I am on the same boat OP, I feel it may be worthwhile just on setting alone. If there's one singular thing Asscreed hasn't really fucked up on is setting. Then again:
wew

WE

ON THE EDGE

Who cares what Holla Forums thinks, dubsman. Just play it and enjoy it. You can still discuss it, though people will just call you a faggot with shit taste. They wouldn't be wrong, because asscreed is pretty terrible, but if you get enjoyment out of it, then fucking go for it.

If you're a faggot that likes shoving things in your boipussy, then I don't care about that, either. I can call you a degenerate hedonist but as long as I don't see it and I'm not involved I really don't give a flying fuck.

HE HAS NO STYLE

(Heil'd)
FROM THE WORKS OF YESTERDAAAAAHAAAAY

But being a garry "nothing personel" stu assassasaasasssin totally lets you immerse yourself and feel how it was to live in such times.
Fuck off, either shill or someone with extremely shit taste.

JUST

Next you'll be telling us that because asscreed is bad that means the polygons are actually voxels or the controller moving the character around is just a figment of our imagination or something

Protip: perspective has shit all to do with immersion.
Or are you telling me Fallout 3 is more immersive than 1?

It's more so because it's Ubisoft and AssCreed trash

RIDES

ALOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEEEYOOOOOOAAAOOOOOOAAAOOOOOOAAAAHAAAAOOOOONE

Holy shit, OP, you might be one of the biggest fucking faggots I've ever seen on Holla Forums.

Kindly go fellate a shotgun and rid the world of your shit taste.

Could you all not be so retarded all the fucking time?

WASH AWAY THE ANGER

I'M ONLY HUMAN

In fallout 1 you play a single character and control them directly

And so do you in 3.

RULES OF NATURE

And you don't in strategy/god games
What's your point

WHEN YOU WALK AWAY

Are you dense?
Point

WUZ

COCK CLEANERS

Rookie mistake tbh

When I asked what your point was, I wasn't asking you to explain what the fuck you were talking about, I was asking how that applies to this scenario

IMMERSION
It's fine because it's first person tho ;)

But you're the only one talking about the specific X-person view

Is someone really trying to shill AssCreed when every game since the pirate one which was decent at best had been utter shit?

I don't think anyone even played any of the other ones
I thought unity was the one that came after 4 until I looked at a wiki and there were like five other fucking games in between

People are going to shit on it not only because you play as Tyrone LeKang, but because Asssassin's Creed games have been dropping in quality since 2. A shitty game with forced diversity isn't going to be saved by using ancient Egypt as a setting. All it'll do is make it look pretty and add potential for interesting lore and characters.

yeah, he might steal it

the chronicles games were dumb little side-scroller spinoffs. the only real game between 4 and unity was ac: rogue

They should still shit on it because you play as a nigger. No one wants niggers.

Why does this make me chuckle I'm not a kid anymore.

it's just funny man

You're never too old for a cheap laugh.

I don't think it looks bad, just meh, but that's par for the course.

Honestly, I don't even mind it. Even as just a meh gameplay template to slap onto interesting settings that would otherwise never get a big budget game, that alone is still a worthwhile niche to have in the industry

He's not black, pic related

He looks like a Paki. Still historically inaccurate. He should look like neolithic Levantine populations, which were Whiter than the current one.

What part of
WE
do you not understand?

Because it being another shit tier asscreed game has nothing to do with it. Kill yourself and check these digits.

Is this Desmond with a slightly darker skin? Again?
Why do the assassins always look the same?

If Ubisoft can call this a woman, then that guy can be called black.

He's definitely a Saracen

I share your love of Egyptian thematics but unfortunately an AssCreed game is virtually guaranteed to be shit. You'll be trapped in a beautiful immersive world that you can only observe because the game gives you hardly any freedom, not to mention the butchering of the setting with we wuz and such.

I think the aesthetic was done quite well in Pharaoh, AoM, Children of the Nile, and that one adventure game set in Egypt

By the way, have any of you played A Tale in the Desert? It's an old as fuck MMO that I played during open beta and while aesthetically it wasn't that Egyptian they made it feel that way with the crafting-focused gameplay. Apparently it's still going on but subscription based now.

Who weren't black, saracen's were arabs, which is what this guy looks like and what egypitans were closer to.

Rings a bell. Tell me of it

Holla Forums misses you.

I played it back then too, but the 'gameplay' was all about seeing who could become king Jew and I bolted. Tepper did understand how to intentionally create collective action problems, but he never really explained why they're fun.

There's no indication of that thus far though, the protagnist is pretty dark skinned but in terms of actual facial features he's clearly not black, same goes for every other character we've seen. The asscreed games in general, outside of the concessions they make for the actual fictional elements of their plots, are actually generally historically accurate, at least more then other vidya.

I've heard they stopped even trying though after black flag, however.


Maybe i'm misremebering my history then, remind me/explain to me how i'm wrong.

MMO where you run around and craft shit in retarded bulk quantities. Also tracked both inventory weight and bulk, but you could carry hundreds of bushels of wheat and such, hilariously enough.

The main "goals" were major building projects, practically impossible without cooperation, so people formed groups where everyone can specialize on some production chains. I barely remember myself but had some good times making thousands of bricks and dicking around in the chat channel.

lol, what a fag

Here I thought Holla Forums couldn't get any dumber.

Pharaoh Tutankhamun, for example, was white.

Trying too hard, shill

Any combat?

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check'd

This is some extradimensional faggotry right there

It's like they stuck their head so far up their ass it came out the other side and then they stuck it up their ass again

Amazing. Fucking checked.

4th dimensional ouroboros

That's true though, the city layouts, architecture, clothing, and all that match up pretty damn well to the time and places the games are showing. Also what the fuck are your images even supposed to be showing? Is this some retarded Holla Forums vs Holla Forums shit? I don't care about that and that's not what were were discussing.

I don't browse leftpol or pol, both of them are retarded ideologue asswipes.

We were discussing the saracen's, not tutankhamun. Also, no. You are WE WUZZING just as bad as blacks.


I don't see the issue with it when that's the entire crux of the game's fictional plot. Everything other then the details like that where the actual plot and lore of the games come in is generally on point in terms of accuracy, at least for 1-black flag.

Re PvP, you could weasel your way into a guild or whatever they called it and steal/destroy tens of thousands of hours worth of effort and the developer considered this to be perfectly ok. You could also pass laws to fuck another group or banish a player from the game and the dev would code them in.

WE

your lost

but AssCreed Kangz: Dank Souls edition isn't about Ancient Egypt.

Why do I not recognize those characters?

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You realize it's fiction and they're not actually writing a history textbook right
The templars and the knights templar are not the same thing, it's about as stupid saying the science hobos that rescue desmond in the first games are the actual fucking hashashin

They are according to the Assassin's Creed wiki.

I guess their (((fiction))) is okay so long as they are showing communism and (((Marx))) in a positive light.

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member when they tried to make asscreed a super cereal e-sport

Try this OP, Quake is comfy:
quaddicted.com/reviews/retrojam6.html

Asscreed lore reaches back long before the concept of knights or even human civilization
The two sides of the conflict are labeled retroactively, in the same way we would call a skeleton that we find in the depths of the earth an early human, despite the fact that that person didn't call itself one

Yeah but they're the same group though.

(checked)
True, but the fact that it's gonna be shit will ruin it for me.
The fact that it's a KANG Egypt ruins any hopes.


lawdy


FUND IT WITH THE FORCE OF THOUSAND SUNS

Was that really intended or just retcon clusterfuck? I always thought the first game, being about the crusades, kind of made sense with a templar-based secret society. But after that it seems like they just didn't know where to stop when expanding to new settings in sequels.

Should have just had different secret orders instead of trying to shoehorn the same one into a recurring villain.

Leave it to modders, Bannerlord and autism will see us through. I just hope they can mod in chariots.

It was.

You're setting yourself up for disappointment.
Bannerlord will most likely be an XCOM2 tier disappointment where it's simply the same game with a few graphical touchups, a few more fuckups and bugs, and a focus on full out modding that goes absolutely nowhere.

This is so supremely pathetic. It's one thing to provide a mythic history for world events, it's another to do so for recent political losses.

Of course it was retconned in
But most of it really wasn't, the modern day villains in abstergo were always secretly "the templars", and all the games never really go farther back than the original aside from in seekrit text dumps and shit

Hell, you could say the exact same shit about the assassins, it all just boils down to whoever happens to be the two opposing sides in the libertarian vs. authoritarian ideological conflict

We know this is not the case.

I guess you somehow managed to miss out on all the mods Warband has gotten over the years.


You can basically summarize AssCreed lore like this:
The really sad part is that there are cucks that actually think AssCreed is historically accurate and not pushing an agenda.

With the "libertarian" side supporting communism and every oppressive ideology over every traditional viewpoint EVER HELD IN HISTORY.

Nobody has ever once claimed that anything related to asscreed's main fictional conflict was historically accurate
The games are shit and the writing is shit but you can't just throw the baby out with the bathwater and claim there's no real history in there at all


I'm the first to admit I've never played all the games, but I've never seen communism in there as anything other than a minor footnote unrelated to the main plotlines of the games

Shill will you fuck off? Your stilted style gives you guys away every time.

One in the back is Nvidia shield. I dont know who the titty monster is.

fuck off with you nigger fetish game.
shill.

my bad user, friendly fire.
Is meant for

Oy vey. Is that why Syndicate has you getting all buddy buddy with Marx, champion of the poor and downtrodden?

Hi, shill.

No, fuck you. The only way I will forgive you is if you get dubs.

She's NeoGeo-tan, apparently.

If you wanna play the shit game so much you could just accept it instead of projecting on others


Oh
Fair enough

ayy I hope so that Butterlord goes the CD project way of quality and evades Creative Assembly. Chariots are a fetish weapon for me since TW Rome and Ben Hur.
Can't believe that they aren't featured in the games at all.

FROM MEMPHIS TO HELIOPOLIS UNDER 30 MINUTES PTAH


I am not following the development since I want to surprised but the last thing that I care about is graphics. That will be taken care by the modders.

Did you miss the boatload of mods that rival TES community?

What I'm trying to say is keep your expectations as low as possible and if it turns out good then you're in for the time of your life. If not then at least you weren't drooling over it like a dog only to be spat on your face.

:^)

You are a broken man, user.

Egyptians were arab/mediterannean.
Look at the fucking geographic region today, everybody there is an arab. Almost not a single white person.

Yeah, actually every game should be set in Ancient Egypt.

Arabs conquered Egyptian and completely assimilated their race into their own, but originally Egyptians weren't Arabs.

They were neither Arab or White, but Egyptian.

Are you retarded?

No, dumbstick. Arabs stayed in their little shit desert until circa 600 AD.

Ramesses II had red hair and belonged to the same ethnic group found in the Balkans and around the Caspian Sea and Black Sea. The ruling class of Egypt was white.

White is a bad term because it implies they're in our modern state. Europid is sufficient.

So if pakis are found all over London does that mean they were quintessentially British? :^)
Ah, nvm then.

I won't even watch gameplay of it. As for games set in ancient Egypt that aren't RTS or builders I do recall that some adventure games had that setting.

You're not missing much. It's the usual AssCreed turd, only now you have a remote controlled eagle pet and can steer arrows in flight.

I have a bigger problem with this than the aryan space gods thing. At least the Thulian remnant actually exist, you know?

how much of this shit is actually true? how much of it is an exaggeration?

No hard proof, but there's enough to extrapolate from to say it's a definite possibility
Again, a 100% confirmed "maybe"
The fiction of asscreed takes place almost entirely within the gaps in the historical record
That conspiracy is absolutely a Thing that Happened