TITCOWS ABSOLUTELY DESTROYED

get ready for titcow lovers to post their busted shit.

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Other urls found in this thread:

hooktube.com/watch?v=4SjpLBPNyoM?t=82
xvideos.com/video4214962/amazing_atheist
encyclopediadramatica.rs/TheAmazingAtheist
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Kirk_diploma_mills
milkgenomics.org/article/do-larger-breasts-make-more-milk/
cep.ucsb.edu/papers/whrlassekgaulin2008.pdf
dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2408591/American-ethnicity-map-shows-melting-pot-ethnicities-make-USA-today.html
archive.fo/Iropk
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

I knew Metro was about scrapping the absolute bottom barrel but they keep surprising me

An article about a fucking YouTube comment.

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...

Not even boobs would save that rat-faced jew.

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FTFY

He's right. Lara Croft isn't supposed to be flat. How hard is to understand this?

Most journalist are just poor freelancers with little culture these days, also they must produce clickbait articles when they are not copy pasting content from press agencies.
All the famous Youtubers have more viewership than them and more money. Advertisement on the Internet is dead, the only way to make profit is to sell readers informations.
Abi Wilkinson, that crazy bitch from the Guardian who was advocating for a 100% inheritance tax to give money to rapefugees, is using Patreon to support her poor journalist lifestyle.
Let it all burn

Objectively, there is no reason why she should have tits, she is not a mother.

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Did you even played the game?

No, just some people on twitter

Glad they didn't cast another boring titcow for this role. titcow fatties need to learn their place

What do?

...

I did, and her tits were nothing to write home about, I fapped many more times to Elexis from SiN than I did to Lara.

Tomb Raider was good for the acrobatic shit and falling to death, it was never "really" a sexy game.

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Lara was sexy, even in the reboot she looked nice.

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Back in the days it was the first video game sex symbol.
Let me give an educated guess, you were born in the 90's.

That was Samus.

Call her mommy and ask her if I can have some milky as she pulls me into a deep hug and I nibble on her neck.

86. The "sex symbol" crap was literally magazine propaganda/hype, I never knew ANY kid that fapped to Lara, most of them were into anime chicks instead.


Phantis came first.

They had to pad Jolie to get close to Lara's assets and didn't even reach the vidya levels.

well, now you have, I faped to Lara Croft, I was turning her so I could see her butt.
=^_^=
He thinks my parents would have bought me a game with a scantily clad woman like Phantis.
Good laugh.

You would have to finish the game to know it was a girl…

That shit got me mad even then, it made me hate Lara even tho I liked the game. Specially because of those "ads" my mom gave me shit for buying the games thinking it was porn.

The best part of Tomb Raider is walking around in her mansion pretending you are rich. ;_;

vikander >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>jolie

jolie was shit and still is better

Of known actresses, Gemma is likely the most suited. Thic, brit, androginous-faced, fit. But she is maybe a bit too thic and too old. So I would go for a new face, there are so many very accurate cosplayers out there, one of them has to be able to act…

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*fat

Does everyone on this board have shit taste?

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This is the ideal female body…deal with it

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I was a kid, she literally masturbates in a hottub during the game…
They remade the game recently, this is her now.

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Lara is supposed to be sexy, which Vikander accomplishes. Big tits are passé.

Poor boy spotted.

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Not too bad, but could be better

A CG movie would be better.

this is a hollywood production. lara was predetermined to be played by a rat-faced jew.

But usually they fix the rat-face with plastic surgery.

Well a blockbuster isn't going to star an ugly woman and women who aren't Jewish are ugly.

Say what? If they really remade it, that's news to me. Otherwise, I'm quite certain those pics are from the original release of the game way back when.

A face is part of a body too and her face is a failure.

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You are quite confused, user.
This is how it looked like in the original:
hooktube.com/watch?v=4SjpLBPNyoM?t=82

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Fucking hooktube can't into timecode, change to youtube or skip to 1:30.

Not only are her tits too small, but her ass is too small, her shoulders are too broad, and her face is too plain. Lara Croft is hot. This chick isn't. End of story.

those both look good. not fat enough for you?

Fuck off Zach. Best Emma is the ideal woman.
Don't lump her with Emily Jean Stone or with Worst Emma.

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Agree except for face. I think she's cute.

Reported for Jewry
>>>/oven/

Based Amazing Atheist, never thought I would ever praise the penultimate redditor himself.

Hold up, is that a dude? I can't tell with that train wreck of a face.

This is who is making the front page of the

Hold up. what the fuck is metro entertainment. Some fagrag gossip shit?

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where's his dick

...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA WTF IS THIS???

WHY DO ALL REDDITORS SECRETLY DO GAY SHIT?

It abandoned him, just like his father.

...

That's the amazing atheist pouring diarrhea on himself and shoving a banana up his ass. The gif is him pouring boiling oil on his nub.

This man is the philosophical backbone of the atheist+ skeptic+ liberalistic+ movement. This is the man who comes on 8ch and calls people cucks and Jesus a kike on a stick. He also hates white people, but I am sure you could have predicted that.

Full video of the oil
xvideos.com/video4214962/amazing_atheist
ED page
encyclopediadramatica.rs/TheAmazingAtheist
Article about his scam artist father
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Kirk_diploma_mills

the jewtube rational septics :^)

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imma go see this movie tbh

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First I see this

Then it's the Amazing Atheist himself "coming out", redditors are fucking gay, who knew?

literally non of us tbh fam

...

made for polska cock

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Puts DOA to shame

Pic related was born a year after me, but I still look like a fucking kid in comparison.

Feels really fucking bad man.

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What is that hideous monstrosity?

Some instagram thot.

this is the first good thing I've seen the amazing banana say in years

muh GOCK

She looks like shit everywhere

...

spotted the faggot
you could fry eggs on that womb

This movie is going to bomb. It's cuntbusters all over again.

beautiful

Insert my goyim DNA into her.


Fuck her face is busted though.

He's telling the truth. Fuck this movie.

Why do people with low IQs love big, saggy tits?

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the movie is so creatively bankrupt it stole 90% of the nu-lara videogame and somehow chose an even nu-er Lara.

dont worry user, you'll deal better with aging later in life

Hollywood really does hate tits, tbh. The whole idea was she is supposed to be a bad ass sexy female. Sure women with smaller tits can be hot but obviously her main feature were her big tits. They're spinning this objectification bull shit as a way to continue pushing smaller titty women. Show the women with some girls some love for crying out loud. I'm sure women can still see the film and enjoy it if they are inadequate in some stupid fucking titty comparison. I just wanna see some boobs tbh.

Pathetic.

It's funny how they try to make a serious reboot but it still has a cheesy title like "Tomb Raider".

...

...

Is your lil sis breeding age?

no one cares you're gay, homo

More sweater meat for me!

thats because anyone not middle eastern is considered exotic and free-game because they are infidels.

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media these day are made for women, not for men, women make up the majority of consumers, so they want plain relatable female characters that couldn't be considered a sexual threat to themselves.

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so… children?

Daily reminder that if you like small tits and no ass no hips you are low T and a pedophile.

Post pics of your lil sis.

Fix'd for you.

That body looks perfect, what's the issue?

There's no way that isn't a transsexual.
Obviously most hollywood actresses have a manlike look to them, but that's definitely a man.

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That's because Jewish women are the men.

hell she might even be part kike

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Ew, she has the torso of a male bodybuilder. Adonis belt and all. Disgusting.

Larger tits are predominantly a white trait. Chances are if you hate big tits, you are probably some kind of shitskin.

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Damn nigga need to get a ticket to Russia.

This.

Definite proof of potatoniggery

I wasn't even aware there was a new Tomb Raider movie. That shit hasn't been culturally relevant in 20 years.

can you imagine how inadequate Vikander must have felt her whole life?

What a handsome young man.

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You're a pleb shit faggot. She has no body keep spamming your spandex shit.

I agree. All women should be given hormone blockers to prevent their breasts increasing in size (as to not arouse men), until they are married. Then they should be given an extreme dose to make their breasts incredibly large for their new husbands and babies.

Spandex shows the true shape of the body, brainlet

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Or maybe it's just UK data painting the whole UK map

No brainlet it deceives you into thinking nothing is something, look at her bikini pics, zero fucking ass zero tits. She has to wear push up bras all the time in her skanky photoshoots.

Those bikini pics are long distance paparazzi pics, focal distance does it.

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Northern Ireland is mostly Scots at this point.

She should pay you to be PR

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Vikander is legitimately flat though

I don't hate big tits. Big tits are great fun, but children born to big-assed mothers have a higher IQ than children born to infertile women. Breast-fed children have high IQ's too, but breast size itself doesn't correlate to milk production.

So in other words, the ideal is a chick with big tits and big ass, but if you had to choose then big ass is preferable as long as she isn't totally flat-chested and can produce enough milk.

t. Born in green region.

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What?
What?

Yes, that's objectively infertile, no matter how big your tits are, read my post again - breast size doesn't correlate to milk production.

It's true, the facts are out there.

She has no tits you fuckface. She has an A cup like Stone.

Tit size varies with body weight

less flat jew trannies.

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Yes, it does. But the size of epithelial tissue in the tits doesn't change, so these women don't produce more milk. In fact, overweight/obese women produce even less milk.

>The study reported a negative association between maternal BMI (body mass index), and the function of a gene that represents the milk-producing cells [12]. This suggested that the breast epithelial tissue is not as mature and ready to make copious amounts of milk in mothers with higher BMI. Most likely, the large breasts of overweight or obese mothers contain more fat cells than milk-making cells, which can explain the low milk supply of many of these mothers [13].

milkgenomics.org/article/do-larger-breasts-make-more-milk/

Higher BMI correlates with big asses.

Filtered, reported.

Big asses don't count if she's fat, just like big tits don't count on a fat chick.

Enjoy your ban for wasting the staff's time with reporting a relevant post that infringed no rules.

The image in your earlier post advocates for fat women and even mentions fatty acid storage and talks about malnourishment. And ass has no reproductive function by itself.

Why complicate things? Their parents should just arrange their marriages at age ten.

Enjoy YOUR ban for wasting the staff's time by reporting someone who hasn't actually reported anyone, dumbass.

Only if she has an ass. Does she?

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Now that's legit fat, get that shit outta here son and stop discrediting the thick movement.

Didn't say she was thick.
She's chubby/fat but still pretty nice ( look at those tits).

But I didn't. I guess no one is getting banned then.

Also relates to the amount of xenoestrogens and other hormone disruptors in the water, food, etc. If it can give boys mantits then it can give girls bigger ones.

No bruh, you post that shit in chubby/fat threads. What's worse than normies associating thick with fat, is when the chubby chaser crowd starts associating thick with fat.

I happen to have the study he's talking about bookmarked.

Hips > ass > tits.

cep.ucsb.edu/papers/whrlassekgaulin2008.pdf

Just more proof that Emma Rose Roberts isn't really Best Emma

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You truly are low-IQ uneducated scum that doesn't deserve to have a voice on the internet.

Besides, Dumont doesn't have the uteral bump.

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...

...

FAT

See, I knew everyone that likes big tits is a fat fetishist.

I thought that was a corn cob outfit at first.

no, they are just overcompensating for being closeted homosexuals

This is a controversial statement now.

lol

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This a hot new meme or something? Ask Jeeves isn't giving me much to go on.

Characters should be designed more realistically.

>not knowing that the original Sega Saturn release of Tomb Raider was rendered in sprites, ie 2d images, ie FLAT

You're both wrong.
And that chick is too fat.
Don't generalize like that based on one guy.

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Fatty acids are everything.

If you can decode the secrets of the fatty acids, you can decode life itself, you can make the perfect body that doesn't age or wither. Immortality is within your grasp user, but only if you unlock the mysteries of the fatty acids.

Side effects include bitch tits and getting raped by daddy and his three drunk friends.

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Not sure if that's right exactly,I admit I like fat chicks (there's a limit obviously) so long as they have tits and ass and are cute in the face however I also like thin and athletic chicks with if they meet the same criteria ( tits, ass, cute face).

How can someone look at this and not be repulsed?

homosexuals like other men user.

It's an anatomy thing. Even a ripped woman like this one exhibits a bump.

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No, that's from the original 1998 game SiN.

This is from SiN Episodes: Emergence, which was released in 2006. (Weird, I thought it was a few years older than that.)

As far as I know, it has not been otherwise remade.

DNA is a protein, not a fatty acid. Not all acids are fatty.

I'm not repulsed (except maybe by her face) but I don't find her hot in any way imaginable.

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SiN is a game from a more innocent time, when games weren't infested by normalfag golems and their social justice faggotry.

It's 2018 user, don't be so insensitive.

Ehh, "fat" chicks are ok as long as they have flat stomachs and their waist-hips ratio is good (ie. they aren't barrel-bodied), in which case they aren't fat but just overweight in a healthy and sexy way, aka "thick", pic related, she isn't skinny by any means but not "fat" either.

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What race is she?

I think she's 56%

The problem with thicccccccccc girls though is that they'll almost always age like shit. That body is hot as fuck when she's young, but give it 10/20/30 years and it's not gonna be pretty.

It was a joke bruh.

(56) 卐
Nice

Well, I mentioned the 2006 one as the recent-ish remake. But I thought it was from like, 2012 at least.

In the second picture, right? Emma, be my gf pls. pls

That doesn't even make sense. The stat says only 56% of Americans are white, not that white Americans are only 56% white. Are you illiterate, perhaps?

No, I meant in the first pic. ;_;

reboot Lara is literally perfect, 10/10 body

Autism.
The statistic is used as a meme, where we imagine an "average american". Averages don't even need to exist as individuals, they're a construction. Don't read too much into banter.

Nice. I think you nailed it not "barrel-bodied" or the converse a flat-board.

30+ ~20= 50 , 50 year old women are not really something I consider fuckable anyway.

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Yeah, but I'm talking about dating thicc girls. It's all good at first but give it a few years and it's not so great.

I am of the opinion that in order to be a hot milf, a chick has to at least be really hot in her younger years. I really don't get the logic that it's a bad idea to marry really pretty women because somehow they will eventually look like worse in their 40s or even 30s than some average girl does in her 20s. I think that's just a myth, I mean, if you look at any younger photos of some hot milf, she wasn't just some plain Jane, even at a younger age she was already a hottie, I can't think of any ugly women becoming better looking with age and reaching milfhood.

I think it really has to do with a lot of other factors like smoking, alcohol, sun exposure, poor diet, etc…

that just looks unnatural and disfigured

It is retarded, that's part of what makes it fun. I don't think it's forced either. You're annoyed by it because you're a burger.

That's because her tits are edited there. Look her up - she's Angela White (a pornstar) and she has big boobs but not comical like that pic.

thats okay, yuropoor countries will be over 75% muslim in the next ten years

Nice silicone user. Looks like a bitch in heat.

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Joke's on you, I'm not a yuro

I think that's where it came from, Europoors got sick of being made fun of for letting so many Muslims in their countries so they forced that retarded 56% meme. But it doesn't really make sense, they'd look less stupid actually using the stat correctly, that only 56% of Americans are white. That's no good.

Americans really do amaze me, they all claim to have German ancestry and that they are therefore "Germans" but at the same time they call Europeans "yuropoor".

And then you wonder why the whole world hates Americans.

You watch too much tv, pal.

It's just bants bro, don't take it so seriously. Euros have such thin skin LMAO

Actually, I don't watch tv at all, I'm just here for the bantz because the mods aren't shit.

When only 56% of your population is white and interracial sex hasn't been shunned upon for decades, that you have a bunch of mutts who are literally about 56% white isn't a surprise, even if you still have some white people.
The meme is as organic as it gets.

kek

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**Well nobody in the US actually says shit like that except drunk guys in St Patrick's day talking about how their great grandpa was Irish or whatever. Pretty much every white just says they're white. It's everyone else that calls themselves a Chinese American, African American, Mexican American, etc.

...

He didn't even use it in the correct context there either.

Watching too much TV, pal. Popular media likes to glorify racemixing but IRL very few white girls subject themselves to that humiliation. Even liberals who talk about how good it is don't wanna do it. There have been tons of genetic tests on the matter, white Americans are every bit as white as any Euro, though there is a lot of mixing between various white ethnicities like German, Swedish, Irish, etc.

goofed my spoiler
Guess I'll slink off now.

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should of cast this girl instead

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I don't mean the Americans in America, I mean the ones on imageboards and on Holla Forums. Like, I personally don't care what ancestry they have as long as it's European, but holy shit is it fucking cringy for every single American out there to claim to be a blonde, blue-eyed Aryan just because they have "German ancestry" even if their German ancestry only comes from one grandparent and all the other grandparents are Irish. You can't just your choose to be German or choose your own race like you're creating a character in Skyrim or something just because you have a drop of German blood in you.

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You might have chosen the wrong picture. All I see is a monkey.

This literally never happens.

I wasn't talking about white Americans, I was talking about the mutts. And interracial sex is a sad reality in the US. Even if it's still a low percentage, with the population you have it translates to millions of mutts per year.

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Why do you like plastic bimbos so much, amerimutts?

It does. I never hear about Americans here being proud of any other part of their ancestry besides the German side.

That probably has something to do with the vast majority of of white Americans having German ancestry.

Interracial shit happens, but 1) There are lots of races here unfortunately, so it's not all whites and 2) it's not nearly as common as popular media makes it seem, just like homosexuality (which whites are actually the least likely to practice). OKCupid stats found that all races had preference for whites, after their own kind, but the favor was not returned. I thought I had that saved but I can't find it.

But yeah, it's no good that whites will be a minority in the US soon.

It's still way more common than in other countries.
I have it, let me look it up.
You can thank the kikes for that.

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I didn't deny it, but why just cherrypick the German side and ignore all your other ancestors?

That's probably because your typical mutt only has German, Irish, (((Anglo))), and Italian to choose from when it comes to their White ancestry. Oh, and some Spanish too, but that's usually filtered through about 200 years of mestizos, so it doesn't really count.

to be fair the US is much larger & has a larger population than other countries so there should be more of everything.

Do you really expect everyone to get a DNA test and celebrate all of their ancestry accordingly? They only know they're German because they were told as such from word of mouth so that's what they go with.

Glad I'm not the only one.

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Those only test a tiny part of your actual DNA, as the Y chromosome is passed by fathers only.

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gay

You make me proud.

To the rest of you, I will never understand how you don't care for proper curves while calling it fat, but gush over man-shoulders, no hips and disappointing flat tits and ass. Your fascination with skeletons is pathetic. You yell about soyboys so much that you have BECOME the soyboy.

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Another example of a well proportioned female body

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Thanks, saved.


Probably cuz Holla Forums is big here and it's cooler to have German blood than French or something.

brb, gotta vomit…

Reported for CP.

Reported for bestiality.

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The trick is to date skinny girls. Most women blow up once theyre in a relationship or after having kids. So if you date a girl whos too skinny at first, after a year or 3 she'll be just right.

You fucker. This shitty bait got me. Goddamit that body is female perfection.

...

Couldn't agree more.

U fukn wot m8?

There are fertility treatments now.

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Oh God I want her to fertility treat me so bad.

that may be the most disgusting one so far ITT

I bet your waifu is one of those dysgenic rat creatures that get posted here all the time.

Anyone who likes this kind of body is a faggot in denial. Everyone knows you're gay.

Hey Zach.

You should look at a map of where certain White groups settled in the US. This is the best I could find for now, unfortunately it includes non-Whites as well instead of just Whites.
Germans are the largest group of Whites in the US by far. Especially in the Midwest, oh man if you get out of the big cities it's fucking obvious. Be happy you're not Irish, plastic paddies are the worst.

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...

dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2408591/American-ethnicity-map-shows-melting-pot-ethnicities-make-USA-today.html
archive.fo/Iropk

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FTFY

meant for
and this

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Hey Zach.

Cover my ears as fast as I can before she starts singing.

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Yeah you totally got him user titty monsters are so intimidating that only big strong men such as yourself are brave enough to not be scared of them.

They are for faggots also fags/trannies envy them for being what they are not beautiful.

Behold as the typical cowtit lover tries to articulate a thought.

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That's a lot of projection coming from a hapa who got his ass kicked by a girl.

ayyyyyyy

Pot, meet kettle. the typical man isn't getting into fights with women and physically overpowering them in order to get laid, thats just you.

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No, you're more the type who gets into fights and gets overpowered by them after trying to get laid that way.

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Feel free to stop projecting any time, I know you might find it hard to believe but most people can get laid without physical force being involved.

I'm not projecting, by your own admission Kelly beat you up.

Where?

On your livejournal, Zach

ebin

Some other user called you Zach, you went along with it, I hopped in. I know you're Zach.

Without further interruption, let’s celebrate and suck some dick!

SHE BETTER BLOW ME BEFORE THE JACUZZI

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Scots are themselves Irish anyhow. Scotch Irish. Scotland consists of Irish Gaels who invaded Britain.

DFC >>> than cowtits. Sorry niggers, but that's a fact. That having been said, that actress is fucking ugly.

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Based Mel

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Remy LeCroix has been BLACKED

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Yes but they raped the local Britonnic population and then got raped by Vikings.

Vikings were niggers that got slaughtered when they faced something without farming equipment. All they ever raped were outer island inbreds like the shetlandniggers. Lowland Scots a shit and Highlanders fucked off to Canada when crumpets tried their annual extermination of their Celtic superiors for the fiftieth time.

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Its funny when Jews roleplay as white people

Lel, don't you have some orphanages to bomb, Seamus?

pick one

Im not the one to usually defend German scum but Varangian guard was as badass as it gets

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you insecure little boys need to learn that just like hrutbd your all DONE, laura croft, the tomb raider, and all videogames and videogame movies in general now belong to us women and minorities, as they always have. fucking deal with it, gamergate failed, nazis failed, jrubgt failed, everyone fails against us, the resistance

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i feel nothing but apathy towards these casting choises after seeing the flat board they cast as Kasumi in the DOA movie
sure i wasn't expecting a good movie in any way
but i at least hoped for Kazumi's giggle phisics to distract me from the horrible plot and i didn't even get that
as far as Nu Tomb Raider is concerned, i couldn't care less, Nu Lara is just a whinny little bitch being dragged through the mud while she rips off Nathan Drake
I want the oldn Lara back
not because of her cow tits, but because she was shuch a hardcore bad ass Mary Sue that not even James fucking Bond could measure up to her

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Piss off jerrycuck.

to be fair, shes not playing OG shoot you in the face and do a backflip into a 40 ft dive into water in an ancient city under antartica lara, shes playing shit-tier vulnerable "survivor" Nu-lara

Nu-lara aint got no tits

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Get back in your containment hole >>>/brit/ and continue being an embarrassment to your country posting about mummies cummies

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There are other factors at play too, like protein expression for example. It can be affected by many things, ranging from pure chance to your diet. It's part of the reason why identical twins still have subtle differences.


DNA is not a protein. It's a nucleic acid, a separate class of macromolecules. Proteins are made of aminoacid chains, DNA and RNA are made of nucleic bases. If you insist on making DNA or RNA one of the other three macromolecules, sugar would be the closest one.

Slim bodies are better than fat bodies.

its late 90s angelina jolie, best angelina jolie, back before she got skinny and moved to africa

DFC is best

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Sauce. NOW.

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Source on pic number 1!

I miss candydoll