Netflix announces Castlevania TV show

A 2-for-1 franchise rape deal. On Kikeflix. How exciting.

I hope Dracula's a muslim.

he'll be a white supremacist or some shit and Trayvon Belmont must go on a quest to kill him.

So? As far as I know that wasn't based on anything and it doesn't look like anybody from that is working on this.

You couldn't make a show about Castlevania good if you tried.
There's barely any story, you just go around collecting shit and killing bosses.

That would be insanely shitty for everyone, and I mean every group from all sides of anything. That would piss everyone off. It would be like turning Hitler into a jew. Dracula is based off of one of the most historically feared figures, that both muslims and jews hated and feared. Their fear and hate is what spawned stories that inspired the original Dracula novel. He is still a beloved hero in Romania to this day.

Well, Vlad was a turkish roach, so of course.

But-

But what? Don't tell me you want Hitler to turn into a jew.

but he is, user

Well, they can make a blatant pro-white series if they want a shekel from me ever again.

Just pirate their stuff if you want to watch something.

...

So do we have a script or something for that so far?

What a miserable little pile of BULLLLLLSHIIIIIT! That's what it is, you fuckin' ass!

I believe Jew Jew said a script was in progress, but Valve haven't officially put the movie in production yet.
It could be scrapped, it's common for that to happen for films that have been in the "ideas" phase for several years.

why would you do that to yourself

I need to see disappointed for myself, trips-man

So more vampire/Belmont drama and less action will be expected. Maybe slipping in some Jewish subliminal messages and a bit of BLM by making the protagonist black.

for a moment i accidentally read that as a Consolevania revival

Castlevania Dracula is not that Dracula. I think he was originally, but they retconned it so that it was some crusader that lost his wife, got so pissed at God that he became a vampire, got control of Death, and destroyed his best friend's life in a gambit to kill the vampire that turned him so that he could have that vampire's power. Then he met some woman descended from demon hunters that managed to make him calm the fuck down, and she got burned at the stake for being a witch; which set him on the "kill all humans" path.

Who cares, Castlevania isn't even that good. Kikes are going to such the living shit out of the Video Game industry well they can. Expect more of kike video game movies.

He both is and isn't.
You see, Bram Stoker's Dracula is an official part of the canon which takes place between some of the games

dont insult the original kebab destroyer

Oh fucking shit what? I didn't knew about this.

Goddamn plebs I swear to god.

does anyone watched that pozzed shit?

Yes, normalfags still watch that shit. Don't act like this is something new.

fag

...

Simon's Quest is about the guy who killed Dracula having to collect his body parts and bring him back to life in order to save his own life from a curse. And the only endings kids can actually get (if they're lucky) result in Simon dying anyway. With a little bit of expansion that could be an awesome Dracula movie.

Dracula from the novel is not 100% confirmed to be Vlad Tepes (though it is heavily implied).

Yeah, how could he not know about Pretentious Hipster Garbage: The Show?

That word doesn't mean what you think it does

Yes it does.

The entire cast, apart from the villain of course, will be towelheads.

Castlevania is not even a normalfag franchise, this is just nostalgia pandering for hipsters who bought an NES Mini with Castlevania on it and pretend that they like it even if they can't get past the second stage. What possible good could come out of a western show based on a japanese IP? None.

If any of you faggots watch anything from this fucking site I will teleport behind you and make it nothing personnel.

Thread related: 8ch.net/pol/res/9205488

Go eat a shot gun you beta male cuck faggot.

We already knew about that shit fag.
We're just shitposting about how terrible this is going to be.

I think you mean "listened to a remix of Stage1" or "saw some fan art on tumblr".

Castlevania's timeline was rewritten several times in course of the game's releases. The last popular timeline before the LoS trilogy made Vlad rule AND Bram Stoker's novel both canon.

Mathias Cronvqst is that Dracula's official origin. To get back at god for letting his beloved die to the plague while he was off in the Crusades, he basically kills his best friend's waifu in an ellaborate game to trap a powerful vampire and use alchemy to become fully-immortal. It works, Mathias becomes immortal and commands Death itself. In trade, his best friend gained a whip w/his dead waifu's soul in it that can fight all forms of evil.

Next installment after that is Dracula's Curse. Mathias went under for several centuries living in defiance of god and befriended and married another woman, having a kid w/her (Alucard). People burned her as a witch for her uses of medicine, tho, so Mathias (now Vlad Dracul/Dracula) pronounced war on humanity and damn-near destroyed Europe if not for the arrival of Trevor Belmont, who was already from a shunned and dishonored family who just so happened to be the continent's only hope. He & a band of people go and "kill" Dracula, though Dracula revives a handful of years later thanks to an obsessive loyalist and former soul alchemist (Curse of Darkness). Simon's Quest and in relation, Castlevania I take place AFTER this all goes down.

This is post Rondo of Blood & Symphony of the Night, where Ricther is the next to put Dracula down, and then Alucard. Because Dracula's soul can't be destroyed (he'll autorez every 50 to 100 years, or less if helped), certain individuals work to put him down for good (The Eclipse War). Because of the prophecy, the Vampire Killer (the whip) is made dormant for 200 or so years, during which Dracula revives several times:

- 1800s (Order of Ecclesia)
- 1800/1900s (Bram Stoker's Dracula)
- 1920s (Castlevania Bloodlines, staring John Morris, son of John Harker iirc—character from Bram's book. Not direct Belmont blood, so cannot use the whip properly and dies due to the strain plus unhealable wounds)
- 1950s (Portrait of Ruin) (Johnathan Morris, son of John, same story, doesn't die because Belnades' decendant, Charlotte, is supporting him with fuck-powerful magic)

And then the Eclipse War happens and Dracula's fortress and most of his power is sealed in the eclipse by Japanese mikos, the Belnades bloodline, the Catholic Church, Alucard, and also Julius Belmont.

tl;dr

THERE IS ACTUALLY A FUCKTON OF LORE AND STORY THAT CAN BE MADE INTO A CASTLEVANIA CARTOON AND THESE CHUCKLEFUCKS ARE GOING TO BOTCH IT VERY BADLY BECAUSE IUNNO SO RANDUM LOLOL

Bloodlines and Portrait of Ruin were in the 10's and 30's, not 20's and 50's.

Take th' Brown Pill ye fuckin fagets

Eat shit and die nigger jew faggot

Couldn't remember exact. I knew PoR was post WWI because the the duped vampire lost his kids in that war.

it takes place during the war actually.

That show was great until season 3 happened. That was a big fucking mistake and ruined everything.

Now this was a great show. Too bad not many people know about it.

Eww. I never once wondered "what would Castlevania be like as a kiked Talmudvision show?"

Hah no

Literally the only thing bad in that clip is the second guy's bit about NBD was kind of week.

What was wrong with season 3?

After their latest stunt where they proudly announced, "We're rich and powerful and we should be able to tell you how to run the government, P.S. Fuck Trump!" not to mention them personally funding countless unfunny stand-up specials where some liberal cunt just whines about how evil republicans are and how no one needs guns, I'm willing to let Netflix burn for their faggotry.

I'm not expecting anything, but I'll give it a go. I have been leaning towards Amazon Prime as of late, but I still enjoy stuff like House of Cards and the Marvel shows PUNISHER FUCKING WHEN. I don't appreciate what they did to Black Mirror, though. Is there a website that isn't chinkshit like ranierland where I can stream for free?

It was really weak overall in comparison and it went nowhere plot-wise, the ending came out of nowhere and it seemed kind of "2deep4u", I didn't think it meshed well with any of the themes of the season. It's like they're just trying to make the character sad and bad disregarding any development in the past. There was also a lot of Tumblr pandering with Todd being "asexual" for whatever reason and all the random Muslim women walking around in the background.
Talking about Todd, they turned the whole "dude drugs lmao" up to 11 this season too which was pretty unfunny and got annoying fast.

All in all, the show is ruined and I can already see season 4 being complete trash.

Why would this need to be a thing? We already have JoJo. Plot's basically the same thing.

Gee i wonder why ((($)))

Sounds like trash.

...

Netflix is SJW as fuck and degenerate.

youtube (dot) com/watch?v=1LzggK5DRBA

Apparently George Soros bought stock into Netflix.

What did he mean by this??

No seriously, what the fuck did he mean by that????

...

He could be talking about the twilight movies

To be fair, the original games aren't entirely super serious either, and basically rehashed the Universal Monster library as enemies.

I mean for fuck's sake, the credits of the first game was a series of gag names.

Wrong video in my first post. Here's what you linked.

Castlevania isn't any of these.
Yeah, it's got vampires, but it's not exactly the focus unlike games such as VTMB.

What does that have to do with anything?

Were those puns a thing on the japanese version? Also
This shit is lazy hipster "fake nostalgia" pandering like the NES Mini and you know it.

They're making a Blame! anime and it's a horrid abomination of 3D that makes the new Berserk look good.

Yeah, I'm aware it's going to be shit, but to think CV was serious business is a bit stupid. Knowing the Japanese, those puns were their idea.

I still kinda want one of those NES Minis though, so I can hack the shit out of it and have a pocket NES.

It sounds like Big Bang Theory: Vampire Edition.

Another hipster turd where Jews and leftists pretend to be nerds and revel in their fake nerd cred and fake nostalgia.

Fuck Netflix, they can choke on nigger dick.

Does that mean that instead of Castlevania we're going to have a 2deep4u porn with black men ?

Into the Badlands was good, right? Action shows can still work.

No thank you.

Konami should be the least of your worries concerning this show considering who is actually making it.

Don't make it worse user.

...

...

It's going to be a Castlevania version of this

Introducing Dracula the white cis vampire of muh patriarchy. The only one who can challenge him is SIMONE BELMONT. she's a strong indy-pendent transgendered demi-sexual polyamory black woman.

and she's here to put Dracisula back in the GRAVE

...

Considering the massive backlash they've been getting for greenlighting the TV show I'm curious to see how they'll handle it.

The video hasn't been out for five hours and it's already at 70,000 dislikes. Guess no one told the Netflix execs that it's a new America they're living in.

Are you being an abelist shitlord? Why would being fat and black be a disability in fighting against supernatural beings that have control over the dark forces of the universe?

I'm hoping the backlash from that "dear white people, we wuz kangs" bullshit makes it so Castelvania the show is good, but I'm not holding out hope.

Hey. Stranger Things and House of Cards are very good.

I just know they're gonna fuck up the Punisher.

I'm actually giggling at the thought of a sassy black woman not a tranny saying Alucard's quotes. With liberal usage of mhmm and gurl, of course.

Who cares.

Thanks Soros.

marketwatch (dot) com/story/george-soros-buys-stakes-in-alphabet-netflix-dumps-disney-general-motors-2016-11-14

There's nothing to make a modern tv show out of here. Netflix will just make it into some forced soap drama with the occasional terrible "action" scene, like every other Netflix drama.
Why can't we put this effort into making another good Castlevania game? People who actually care about Castlevania won't like this and people who don't know the series won't give a shit about the name anyway.

>HOL 'UP GURL, I'S CALLED HERE BY THE HOOMANS, THEY WANTED TO GIVE ME THEY SHIT

that clip is rather bluepilled. Liberals do love to virtue signal and virtue signaling can be characterized as attempting to impress by putting on an affectation of great importance, talent, knowledge or culture, than is actually possessed. Or in more concise words pretentious.

If it stars the semen demon from Castlevania pachinko I could theoretically endorse a few episodes :^)

Are you the same mouthbreather that wrote "suck off a shotgun"?

I still don't understand how that fucker gets all the movies. It's like they're trying to generate the next generations Spielberg or something but all of his movies are shit.

They looked to me once. Now they turn to you. Do you understand now? Do you see that the truth is they don't want to change this?

Isn't it being made by the ones who did Autism Time? If so, it'll be terrible.

You could totally fight Dracula with a spatula.

fuck it

Oh so random horses and dogs in indulging in nihilistic Hollywoodian lives with pseudo-deep highschool level commentary. Top notch show right there. You sure reddit wouldn't be more your speed?

Last i've heard it was supposed to be "anime" styled, so this could be better than what we think or terribly worse

I know you are being ironic, but now way they will put that in the series.

...

WHAT IS A MAN?

A MISERABLE PILE OF MISOGYNY AND SEXISM!

both of his parents are executive producers. There has been exactly 0 fresh talent from Hollywood for decades now.

...

Fuckin hell

This is a fate worse than pachinko.

Im dead serious when i say i agree. A castlevania film could be good, but itd have to have a similar aesthetic as the earluly Hammer Dracula movies with just a little more over the top factor.
Liberal fucktards dont understand those old movies whicj inspired the games, fuck me this announcement bothers me the more and more i think about it.

I think Castlevania's been raped a bit more than once so far.

BUT ENOUGH TALK, CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE

so
what if dragula is donald trump
and the alchemists who are like silicon valley develop this superwhip for this brave black woman
and in the end you see the castle collapsing which is like trump tower or something
and we can add subweapons just like in the games only here we'll make it hammer and sickle

...

Huh?

...

How is that hope? That's called pure fucking cancer.