Currently writing Holla Forumsitically incorrect literature, could use advice/critique

Dylan Flores
Dylan Flores

As I posted on halfchan, a while back I kept seeing threads complaining about the lack of modern right-wing literature, so I’ve written some. I’m posting it on both ‘chans because why the fuck not.
The story I’m writing is an epic tale of race war, revolution, unmitigated autism and anime becoming real. The premise is that the deep state has finally succeeded in taking down Trump, social justice and the radical left are exploding in both power and popularity, and civil breakdown leading to mass slaughter is only a matter of when, not if.
The main character is an unemployed 35-year old NEET who’s wasted his life playing vidya, watching anime and shitposting on Holla Forums. Having all but given up on life, he orders a sex doll from Amazon to help fill the void, but what ends up arriving on his doorstep is NOT what he was expecting…

I could use critiques/corrections/advice, and also if you’re a bored drawfag I definitely could use some art.

PDF of the first two story arcs (recommended):

dropbox.com/s/5q0e2vrckk7z8pu/EIMH Arc 1.pdf?dl=0

dropbox.com/s/qdsnrf53qt41xp5/EIMH Arc 2.pdf?dl=0

Since it has anime characters from various sources I also posted it on a fan fiction site for the fuck of it, but due to the offensive content I’d be shocked if it stayed up for long (not recommended):

TLDR: I’m basically writing Holla Forums the novel, and I think you faggots will like it

Attached: EIMH2.jpg (162.9 KB, 1003x1417)

Other urls found in this thread:

fanfiction.net/s/12878173/1/The-Emperor-in-my-Head
fakenamegenerator.com
desuarchive.org/pdfs/thread/8544/
arktos.com/
dropbox.com/s/p6o3qszhkbx6dcx/EIMH Arc 1.pdf?dl=0
dropbox.com/s/gbf4xj8fhzsgu4i/EIMH Arc 2.pdf?dl=0

Brody Foster
Brody Foster

Whoops forgot FF link

fanfiction.net/s/12878173/1/The-Emperor-in-my-Head

Noah Ward
Noah Ward

Can you include this guy getting killed?

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Dominic Russell
Dominic Russell

By the end of the story the world's population is reduced by over 99 percent.

So yes.

Liam Cooper
Liam Cooper

i will give it a read and let you know my opinion
get a better job moishe

James Barnes
James Barnes

I really can't approve of this sort of genre fiction, but if you think people will read it, go ahead.

Benjamin Roberts
Benjamin Roberts

Any racist stream of consciousness inner dialogue?

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Adam Taylor
Adam Taylor

It's not the Turner diaries

Jack Hall
Jack Hall

Actually yes, the main character is fairly normal but one of the later characters is basically a stormfag

Colton Rogers
Colton Rogers

I think he deserves an explicit execution, or elevation to a main villain in a sequel.
only jews want chicken fuckers killed
OP, nominate this user for execution as well.

Owen Ramirez
Owen Ramirez

That's an indredible amount of cringe in a short post. This is more appealing to halfchan for sure, we're a bit more esoteric and, dare I say, 'mature' here.

Holla Forums the novel would be Murdok Murdok's Last Son of the West in longform and with more enemies, less IP theft. That or a coming of age story set in collapsing South Africa. A Holla Forums stand in is a young man, not quite neet, not quite trashy, not quite defeated. Your main character appears to be /a/.

I can't quite put my finger on what bugs me about your intent, but I can't help but think of Harrison Bergeron. I and everyone in my class loathed that story for its extreme hyperbole of circumstances, yet it stuck in our heads. Years later I see it in action, yet I still hate the story.

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Angel Wright
Angel Wright

My intention is basically to describe a worst case (black-pilled) scenario where the radical left achieves total victory, as well as explore what options might remain to the opposition (mostly transhumanism)

The anime girls are a polite fiction.

Jace Jenkins
Jace Jenkins

I agree with (check'd) that this is more of a 4chan thing. It's perfectly fine to make content for them; promoting Holla Forums as a sub-culture would be extremely useful in the long-term. But if you're interested in making actual right-wing literature then I imagine something more serious, like a person finding meaning in our liberal-consumerist society. For a novel I'd like to see a character many people can relate to: someone out of shape, a bit anti-social, maybe his dad was a bit of a soyboy, he never really found a path in life and is just wage-slaving or studying at college. Taking this bugman and slowly turning him into an archetypal hero would be great, the progression of his character would definitely be the main theme of the book. It would also be interesting if towards the end of the book he stopped thinking in terms of "I'm the good guy and I must defeat the bad guy" and instead started thinking in terms of will-to-power. The idea of him shedding his slave-morality would be an interesting final theme. It would make him seem a bit evil towards an entry level red-pilled person. There are a lot of themes that could be worked with.

Liam Rodriguez
Liam Rodriguez

Huh… yeah, I'm not much of a salesman, so it must look like a lame comedy from my OP.

But what you've described is close to what actually happens. The MC is a hopeless loser who through desperate and trying circumstances slowly grows into more and more of a type of person who exerts control, and shapes the world around him according to his will. Even if the sci-fi elements are a little outlandish, I'm hopeful that the reader will grow along with the character.

Also new/updated forms of right-wing governments are explored, utilizing benevolent AI assistance, for example.

There's many different themes, but I wasn't sure how to list them all without making that a novel all its own.

Wyatt Wilson
Wyatt Wilson

Have similar ideas for a near future comic if I ever make it that's basically about the common path most of us took to get to this point. Not exactly neo-Turner Diaries, has a bit more fantasy elements here and there, but just a kid and his friends slowly dehumanizing themselves and facing to the bloodshed. I don't like to be too overtly political in my stories, but add a lot of subtle messages.

Jace Lee
Jace Lee

The main character is an unemployed 35-year old NEET who’s wasted his life playing vidya, watching anime and shitposting on Holla Forums. Having all but given up on life, he orders a sex doll from Amazon to help fill the void, but what ends up arriving on his doorstep is NOT what he was expecting…
This sounds like good fun, but I hope you can write. My writing is pretty shitty in my opinion, but if I continue improving, I'd like to write fun anime-tier shit for Holla Forumsa/cks as well. Especially since if we have to wait much longer for the DOTR, anime will get kiked by Crunchyroll, Netflix, etc. or non-commie fansubbers will get targeted and gulag'd for "international copyright infringement."And not all of us are going to "just learn moonrunes" in case of the latter. Besides, some anime are shitty even without jewish influence, so there's always room for more Holla Forums approved media.

Nolan Hill
Nolan Hill

I'd read that if you ever made it. The MC in my story starts off slightly red-pilled but good-natured enough that he would never want to hurt anyone except in self-defense. But as things deteriorate and he slowly loses his humanity paradoxically this leads to him becoming more human (as the unimportant trappings of modern life fall away). That's what I was shooting for anyway.

Why not read it and see? I think you'd enjoy it. I try to add a healthy dose of humor and light-hearted moments to help balance out the horror of a triumphant left. Also check'd

Isaac Barnes
Isaac Barnes

Try adult-fanfiction.org, you'd be surprised at how deviant some of that stuff is. There's probably already Hitler fanfics on there, your stuff will be take compared to the worst of the Harry Potter slash and MLP S & M that's already up.

Juan Hernandez
Juan Hernandez

Mild, not take

Ethan Fisher
Ethan Fisher

This thread has kinda motivatedme , so I just might get started when I get the time. Drawing is a real pain though. Keep up with the good work, OP. I want to finish the rest of this.

Dominic Fisher
Dominic Fisher

I have an idea about a white man being abducted by aliens and going on a massive adventure. From test subject, to zoo exhibit, to fugitive, to prisoner, to slave, to fugitive again, survivalist, gladiator, bodyguard all ending with him getting back to Earth and helping out the war against the xenos.

Jaxon Gonzalez
Jaxon Gonzalez

Wow you weren't kidding. Yeah I'll probably repost it there if and when FF.net takes it down.

Thanks I will, and even if its a pain I'm jealous of anyone that can draw (I mean look at the cover art, it's just silhouettes and I still fucked it up). If you're good at it don't let that talent go to waste.

Justin Watson
Justin Watson

Holla Forums content creation threads are super /comfy/. Shills don't seem to take notice of them.

Are there any Holla Forums themes you want to explore in it, or is it just a fun sci-fi book?

Role models are pretty important to young people. If you're able to make a relateable character that gets turbo-red-pilled in an entertaining book then you'll be doing a lot to help. It's nice to see that so many youth have taken to the third position.

The cover looks great.

Isaiah Baker
Isaiah Baker

As I posted on halfchan, a while back I kept seeing threads complaining about the lack of modern right-wing literature, so I’ve written some. I’m posting it on both ‘chans because why the fuck not.
Why would you even mention that place?
I could use critiques/corrections/advice, and also if you’re a bored drawfag I definitely could use some art.
Please help me design the perfect escapist pulp to get at your shekels.
Don't for a moment think this is some random user, one of us. The person behind this has a sexual fetish for 3rd Reich imagery and fascination for homosexuality and interracial sex. obviously that might not fully transpire in what they write because they are tailoring the story to a particular market for maximum profit If you want to get closer to the source, think of a notable anti-white shill who likes to dress up in German uniforms, cosplays and is also an author of revisionist material charging Hitler and his men of homosexuality and negrophilia. Despite their hatred of everything we stand for, they cannot help but keep trying to milk us for their true love is money.
Since it has anime characters from various sources I also posted it on a fan fiction site for the fuck of it
Everywhere this shill tries to advertise their material, they will write the same disclaimers, just tailored to the group they're targeting. Notice how they imply their real allegiance is here, and the posting elsewhere was little more than incidental. That's to make you feel important. In fact they're simply tailoring their blurb to wherever they happen to be advertising, this is not a Holla Forumsack, this is an enemy trying to make money from you. Anime characters being a core part of it is not incidental.
tl;dr stick your blood funnel somewhere else, leech.

Oliver Kelly
Oliver Kelly

That's why I made the MC start off as basically a man-child so so that a wide age range of disaffected males could (hopefully) relate to him, and take some inspiration from his personal growth into a man of power.

Also there is a secondary character from Antifa who gets a different kind of redpill once the atrocities begin, so I'm trying to hit it from both sides so to speak.

Anyway if you get a chance to read it I'd love to get some feedback. And thanks, as most creators do I tend to get overly critical of my own work.

There's literally zero way for me to make money off this

Evan Hill
Evan Hill

Whatever Holla Forums has written i would read.

Btw: If you plan to write a book, please write it in LaTex. It is what all modern publishers use.

And for gods sake pick a more natural sounding pseudonym. Here use this to pick a new author name, "AnonzoGlory" just doesn't sound good.

fakenamegenerator.com

Xavier Ross
Xavier Ross

Which artstyle would Holla Forums prefer for a comic? Pic related is to show a very quick drawing I made for my range from sharp features to round, more cartoonish features. I like the rounder options more since they're a lot easier and a bit more fun to draw, , but I can probably find some compromise here and there. I'm not typically a guy who draws super amounts of details. So thoughts, tips, suggestions? I'm pretty open minded when it comes to my drawing. Furthest left option looks like a chiseled wojack, didn't intend for that lol

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Nicholas Sanders
Nicholas Sanders

Personally i'd opt for the central or right option, something more like Archie.

Robert Powell
Robert Powell

Could you post it on /pdfs/?

Noah Cox
Noah Cox

I can upload a few more examples of my drawing if people would like to see what my capabilities are at

Isaac Sanders
Isaac Sanders

and take some inspiration from his personal growth into a man of power

I like when the authord puts down effort in his writing. I appreciate the art behind this and can sense when someone just wrote another book to make some shekels without retrospektion on the craftmanship itself. The later Harry Potter books are pure trash for instance, because JK Rowling only wrote those for the money. Meanwhile her first book was written with no intention of making money. Same thing goes for the first Lord of the Rings book. When the author is relaxed and just wants to write something good, the attitude infects the work itself; the content starts feeling good.

Sure why not. Looks promising.

Noah Wood
Noah Wood

Go with the one on the right, less is more.

Asher Cox
Asher Cox

Thanks, downloading it now
And I don't want a natural sounding pseudonym. If I ever do change it it'll be to something else that stands out.

I like the center dude the best, I think the other two are a bit harder to take seriously (unless that's what you're going for). And yea post more fuck it.

No problem. I think I improved the summary a bit from my OP
desuarchive.org/pdfs/thread/8544/

Michael Long
Michael Long

Here's a couple I just drew up.

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Ryder Powell
Ryder Powell

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Adam Richardson
Adam Richardson

You could see the author of this book as just another character too, that you are creating.

You're pretty skilled bro. Have you ever tried Adobe Character Animator? You could make those characters come alive, with voices and arm movements and all.

Isaiah Howard
Isaiah Howard

Thanks, user. That'll probably be the style I'll go with. I haven't heard of that Adobe Character Animator

Leo Long
Leo Long

Yup, you definitely have talent and style. If I could draw like that I'd try and make a webcomic instead of novel for sure.

Hmm… that might not be a bad idea

Josiah Foster
Josiah Foster

If you want user can give me a way to contact you. You write your story, I draw your story

Benjamin Roberts
Benjamin Roberts

Does Holla Forums have any advice on publishing. I have a couple of stories lined up, but I don't know where to post them.

Lucas Hughes
Lucas Hughes

I haven't tried it either. But It looks pretty cool. You can like control the facial animations using your own webcam. See video related. Might be fun playing around with.

Connor Rivera
Connor Rivera

<unemployed 35-year-old NEET who wasted his life playing vidya, watching anime, and shitposting on Holla Forums
The whole thing reeks of cuckchan. Like this quad-user opines, I don't think 8/pol/ is the place for this. We tend to have our shit together here, and we're definitely not the spitting image of the autistic /b/tard faggot your protagonist seems to represent.

That said, there is certainly no "lack of right-wing literature" if you're bright enough to find it.

arktos.com/

anime is gaye

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Hunter Young
Hunter Young

Holy shit, really? Can't say no to that.
I created an anonymous protonmail account specifically for this, it's on the final page of each pdf (so people could give critiques/death threats directly if they wanted). Read it first though, see if it jives with your style.

From what I understand, it's shit simple to self-publish on Amazon. If I was trying to make money of mine that's where I'd put it.

Maybe so, but I wanted to take everyone's feedback into consideration from both Holla Forums's, due to its prominence in the story.

Landon Reed
Landon Reed

Sure thing user. I sent you an email

Easton Russell
Easton Russell

Huh… turns out I accidentally left out the underscore in my e-mail address. Whoops. Please use the one from these corrected PDFs:

dropbox.com/s/p6o3qszhkbx6dcx/EIMH Arc 1.pdf?dl=0

dropbox.com/s/p6o3qszhkbx6dcx/EIMH Arc 1.pdf?dl=0

Isaiah Parker
Isaiah Parker

dropbox.com/s/gbf4xj8fhzsgu4i/EIMH Arc 2.pdf?dl=0

Joseph Fisher
Joseph Fisher

Make a sonichu character.

Mason Thompson
Mason Thompson

(((publishing)))
Writing as a medium is dead until the kikes are removed from power. Think hard. You're asking for advice on the internet, you're not asking in a writer's group, you're not asking in a newsletter, you're not asking in a newspaper.
Think of the medium where you're actually heard. Stop wasting your time.

Mason Reyes
Mason Reyes

We dream the same dream, you and I. I have a setting that I've been working on for a while now that I believe you would be interested in, especially for hyperbolic satire; I want to create psy-fi Vril-pulp as a setting genre where you can slay (((intergalactic vampires))) with mentally guided pinwheel disk launchers of luck. It has Agartha, the Underworld, the Underseas and the Surface world. It's basically "Vril 2: The race has come and so have I" with three different ages.

The End Age: Vril-Punk, shades of gray and everything is fucked. The surface is dominated by a single world order called Super Zion, the underworld is a giant ghetto, the Undersea is filled with garbage from India and the Agartha is lethargic off some strange drug; a cold war between the Underworld and the Agartha is what’s preventing any action from occurring but some refugees with flying saucers from Germany have other ideas. This is a near-future cyber-punk that can’t seem to get any worse, can it? Turns out earth is actually apart of intergalactic empire! But, they’re vampires and Earth is another televised slaughter-world; I suppose that explains the taxes, funny tasting water and all the fat people.

The Great (unconditional) Wildhunt: Hyperbolic warfare, super-jail meets WH40K slapstick total war of carnage. Crush zombie cyborgs, being controlled by Omnibotnet-zi the universal cosmic-horror, with your mind after emerging from a mole machine, but make sure to get back underground before the relativistic magic missiles hit. It’s a four way war between the Underworld, Agartha, the Vampires and…Space Pirates? The Surface sure is fucked, they had it coming though. Spoiler alert: Santa Claus, Lord of the Wildhunt throws the vampire’s (((Dark Dwarves))) into Saturn so that Jebhovah can devour them.

The Age of New Realms: Vril-Pulp, good is good and evil is evil. Earth was just the beginning. This is a synthwavey world where they’re rebuilding Mars and Marduk, the reincarnation of Hitler has had a painting show every Sunday, after finally getting accepted into art school. Will you march the imperial Halflings into the defeat the vampire empire? Explore the stars and find the original creator race’s relics? Or will you join the warrior-poets to complete the hero's journey to become legendary?

I was actually thinking of making a Holla Forums orientated OC board for the cultural blitzkrieg and manifesto for anyone that wants to use the setting for games, stories and art. I would love to kick off a living community setting like Forgotten Realms of the 80s, where people report their game sessions and exchange maps.

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Noah Clark
Noah Clark

The second image has a bunch of watermarks due to jews in BoxShot 4.

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Aiden Edwards
Aiden Edwards

Why is this anchored.

Ryan Clark
Ryan Clark

I will when I have more time for entertainment, just thought I'd express my opinion now. Is there a place you intend to continue uploading pdfs to as you go? Maybe to some shitty blog, the thread you made desuarchive.org/pdfs/thread/8544/ here, or to the /polmedia/index.html board?

Mason Diaz
Mason Diaz

I don't care what writer's groups and the others think. I care what Holla Forums thinks. And yeah, it seems I have some work to do, but I'm definitely not giving up. You'll be seeing this again, at some point.

That's… very unnerving.

Probably the pdfs thread for now. If you do and feel like giving a critique please use the e-mail found in this version

Christian Cooper
Christian Cooper

Dynamics:
multiverse/quantum mechanics/Flat Earth, UFO psyops vs. EM Universe/Hollow Earth, terrestrial break away civilization(s)
retrofuturism vs. nostalgia gimmickery
'oversocialization', false consciousness, entrainment vs. isolation, anomie, monastic/ascetic
butter vs. bacon fat
rockets vs. saucers
At least one allusion to Legacy of Totalitarianism on the Tundra; tied with Golden Horde/Timurlane crypt opening launching Operation Barbarossa

Suggest the
–Joycey Dialogue format, at least in discretely
– Stream of conscious sections.
"Ass-loads of quotation marks," user decried, "and commas are AIDS."

Also: Cursed Images are your friend.

Vril/lit/ Thule Punk
I like it.

For reference:
Bowden, Pulp Fascism
Wyndham Lewis
Joseph Suglia, Years of Rage, Watch Out
mass shooter phenomena as an outgrowth of degenerate American high school social structure/
Germanophillic (Sterner) practicing solipsist living the consequences of the end-goal of modernist/technoliberal society, treats subhumans (everyone) as sex dolls
Burroughs
best mind to come out of US early-mid Cold War popular literature; techno punk/scifi dystopianism

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Noah Gray
Noah Gray

/polmedia/index.html

Andrew Cox
Andrew Cox

Do you remember the story about the wage slave guy with no meaning in life that meets an old guy and talks to him almost every day about NatSoc themes and after the departure of the old wise man the new man follows his path. This short story encapsulated most of the themes you are proposing
i remember being poster here almost 2 years ago. The cover was a cog with a swastika in the middle.
i doubt i saved it, but let me check

Dylan Cox
Dylan Cox

don´t worry op, finish the story, we all know that this is a "for fun" fanfiction. You need start somewhere.

Elijah Barnes
Elijah Barnes

After spending five minutes reading, I would recommend trying to reformat the writing to be more in line with traditional literature.
This will shrink the size of the book considerably and would make printing it out a lost easier as it would take up fewer papers.

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