Let's say you're some big-shot Nintendo manager

Bayo 2 was one of the Wii U's better releases in terms of sales, so a good idea would be to repeat that model.

Firstly I would fucking advertise it and follow up the reveal with further information about it. (They are seriously brain dead.)
I'd stop pretending support for the 3DS and Wii U hasn't stopped for it and go all out advertising it as the home and portable hybrid it is.
Can't rewind time to release for the holidays so I'd really drum up the advertising to get interest going for March.

As for what it needs. A strong launch window line up is important.
Both third party and first party, because the company is likely still going to be fucking up a lot of first party series.

Hareware wise, if the custom Tegra SoC isn't at least a step up from the X1 that's going to be trouble.
If that screen isn't at least 1080p heads will roll.
The battery life needs to be decent.
That D-pad made of buttons needs to be changed into an actual fucking D-Pad
More ergonomic controller pieces need to be made.
A variety of different controller pieces need to be in the works and arrangements made for third party pieces.

And I'd secretly sabotage it to be easily hackable right off the bat, because it'll sell just for the people who want a really good handheld. There's always enough who will purchase games, so there are sales to be made from those who would rather pirate everything (whatever their reasoning is) and/or emulate.

That's what would make the Switch excellent and succeed.

If they wanted it to sell they'd announce stuff like a port of GTA V, an actually 60fps working version of MInecraft, and other must have titles for kids

Don't forget the fps. If it's not stable or goes below 40fps then this can't compete with any consoles or tablets that can do the same and better.

I would have never announced Pokemon Sun/Moon for the 3DS, make it a switch exclusive and make able to interact with pokemon go (force the pokemon go devs to do a new update for the game with shit casuals have been whining months for so the userbase comes back).

Get rockstart or bethesda to port their shit and pay for some sort of exclusive bonus that makes the shitty ports some how better than the rest. There, easy casual dollars.

Here's what you do
1. Go kill yourself, I've worked at NOA and I know what you fuckers are like, you do not deserve to live
2. There is no step two, you are dead and the problem is solved.

Now, in the case that you're talking about NCL rather than NOA, the solution is a strong software lineup at launch.
It's hard to say if Nintendo actually has that, though, since they haven't given us more than a sneak peek at the software.

Well it depends on both the hardware and the optimization of the software.
One that note however, it's critical that whatever OS and APIs they develop for the Switch are damn good and easy to work with.
The better the tools are the easier it'll be to make a performant game on the system, especially since developers won't be used to the hardware.

If they were to cheap out and use a custom android as the OS there would be trouble, but I doubt they would. If they didn't make games themselves they might have done something that stupid.

Vocaloid Idolmaster Squid Girl VR Stay Fresh Edition

madman

One of the treehouse staffers who got let go?

Don't even try to bring my waifu into this user , i'll turn your boipucci upside down

Her face makes her look like an alien

I wasn't one of those lowly faggots, no.
There's more shitholes than just treehouse and product testing at NOA.
Or rather, the whole place is one gigantic shithole.

All women are lmaos user

Get to the good stuff already, spill the beans now, give us all some more insight.

that's a trap

they can't. it's too late

Seriously, extra pieces for certain games would be the tits. Remember the microphone for Odama on the Gamecube? Shit like that is actually compelling. What's the point in having parts if there aren't any more than just the basic two of them?

Make a humanoid version with switchable tits. It's cliché but at least I'd buy it.

I would farm out franchises that fans have been asking for to teams that have shown ability in the genre. For example, I would hand the F-Zero licence to the Fast Racing Neo team with some corporate oversight (but not control), hand a 2D Metroid off to the Image and Form guys that make the Steamworld games, get Retro on another 3D Metroid, get Monolith on another big sci-fi RPG to complement the fantasy RPG that is BotW, and re-release all the party multiplayer games with extra content (Nintendo Land, Mario Party, Mario Kart, Hyrule Warriors, Mario Maker, Splatoon, Smash) at discounted prices to really boost the library early on and make sure there's a reason for multiplayer which will make more people want to buy their own system. Then I would simultaneously find projects that fans like that aren't being developed (VANQUISH 2 PLEASE) and get those rolling as exclusives, with ports of the original too, and top it all off with some fancy custom controller shit for big-name games (and at the very least an optional left-hand piece with a proper fucking d-pad and a right hand piece with buttons and stick swapped). And I'd throw in VC games and make them dirt fucking cheap or even free if you buy related games (e,g, buy the new Mario, get the NES trilogy free). And I'd make sure it still has StreetPass because for some reason that shit is strangely compelling and sweet, perhaps tie it to a mobile app so you don't have to cart the actual tablet around, and then when you get home your phone syncs to your Nintendo account and you get to "meet" all the people you streetpassed while oot and aboot.

a new fucking F-zero with no bullshit gimmick

If the Switch came with a coupon for a free Rapp session…

I wonder how long it'll take to get an emulator.

No but she is a prostitute.

I don't even have to spill the beans, if you'd use your stinking head you could figure it out yourself.

Think: what does NOA do?
-localization (they hire feminists and cucks and mexicans to insert political bullshit into their shitty translations)
-customer service (they hire nintendo niggers, treat them like shit and pay them in shittings)
-product testing (they hire avid nintendo fans, treat them like shit and pay them in shittings)
-website development (they grab programmers, treat them like shit and pay them in shittings)
-IT (they grab some dumbasses who only know basic windows usage and ask them to maintain servers, pay them handsomely to fuck up over and over since they never know what they're doing)
-marketing (they grab feminists and cucks, pay them handsomely to go waste millions on their stupid advertisements that brought about PR disasters such as the Wii U)
-human resources (they grab feminists and cucks and pay them handsomely to find new people to fuck over)
etc. etc. etc.

I didn't even have to tell you any of this,
if you just thought for five seconds about what NOA does as a company you could guess it and be spot-on.

GAMES

That's all I want. It could have a shit battery life and be exactly as powerful as the Wii U and I wouldn't give a shit, because I just fucking want good games.

I would buy the shittiest console with the worst specs if the games were great. All I want are good games.

These are jokes right? I've seen this Skyrim shit since the Switch announcement. Please tell me we haven't actually been overrun with tasteless faggots. Please tell me it's just next-level Toddposting.

As long as it's region-free and it gets good games, I'll get it. Something tells me a lot of the devs working on the Vita right now will jump ship to this since there's no new Sony portable in sight.

Pick two, and only two. Three of these things may not intersect. It's a fucking thin tablet, there's no way it can push 1080p30 AND have good battery life AND be an off-the-shelf Tegra. No way in hell. It'd be like all of the shit parts of owning a Vita with none of the good parts, but worse, because the screen is bigger, physically and resolution-wise, and with even less room for internal battery space.
Even with this being a mental exercise, you're still not living in the same reality as us if you think that Nintendo has any desire to cater to the hacking and homebrew folks. This is the same company that's been using tri-wing screws, among other weird shit, to hold their consoles together as far back as the GBC and N64, if not earlier.

SENSUAL STAYCATION

It's not off-the-shelf. Nvidia's press release the day the Switch was announced said it was a custom chip built especially for Nintendo, with specialised libraries and dev tools and shit.

From what I've heard though, the tablet is native 720p or 900p, not full 1080p, but it will upscale to output 1080p to a TV when docked (the dock won't provide any extra grunt though).

Promise a new smash game with a 300 character roster

I'm guessing, although the dock won't provide any extra oomph, it will allow for the tablet to use the full power of the chip, that will probably be underclocked to save power when running portable.

That's my guess, though.

Sorry, must've missed that. I was AWOL the day it was released, I didn't get the information until after the fact. What about it is custom, though? Is it leaning more towards power savings or processing power? Because that'll seal the deal of whether or not it's going to succeed as a handheld or not.

Same thing I thought. I wouldn't be surprised if the Switch just flat-out dominated in Japan, forcing all Japanese 3rd parties to port their games over to it. I don't see the Switch doing well in the west though unless it can reach xbone levels of power when docked and has an attractive launch price. The power (and ease of programming for) are probably two of the most important things because if it's easy to port to, then the Switch will get all of the yearly titles that everyday gamers like which will help create an audience for 3rd party games on the tablet.

That's a good point, too. If it's closer to the X2 in power than the X1 I can see it being "good enough" to get some 3rd party support. Anything less than that is way too shaky, though.

Either way I'll be fine with it. I'm a big fan of my Vita, so having a Vita 2: Electric Boogaloo with some Nintendo games seems pretty up my alley.

I hope that rumor a while back is right and Nintendo got a steal from nvidia for the custom Tegra because they really need to price the Switch aggressively in comparison to the PS4/Xbone.

Yeah. As much as I hate EA, the Switch needs xbone level power to get their support – specifically their yearly sports titles in order for the Switch to succeed in the west. Core Nintendo fans aren't going to buy western 3rd party games so Nintendo is going to need all the yearly titles that non-Nintendo fans love in order to create a gaming library that they're used to on the xbone/PS4.

Easy OP.

You just need to remind the masses that nintendo used to be good, and they will forget how shit nintendo is now.

No idea on the specifics, here's Nvidia's press release. blogs.nvidia.com/blog/2016/10/20/nintendo-switch/

Rumours (and they are just rumours) put the screen at 720 to 900p and power output at higher than 360/PS3 but just under current Xbone and PS4. But, given that this is Nintendo who now more than ever will be embracing the Apple model of incremental hardware upgrades, it's likely we'll see yearly or bi-yearly new hardware releases with higher specs and full backwards compatibility, which would be fucking sweet.

My guess is it's something to do with what >11060278 said which would make a lot of sense (scaling down the clock-speed on battery and letting it rip when docked).

I've heard the same as well. Nintendo got a bargain working with Nvidia on this thing and its power output is just shy of Xbone and PS4. It's on a different architecture though, so porting from the other two consoles which both run x86 (PC as well) won't be as easy, but they wouldn't be Nintendo if they made things easy for themselves.

...

I would make a video of the switch pretending to play games. pic related

what no fucking way that's a fucking DOWNGRADE

Calm down, only the tablet might be 720p/900p. When it's docked it should be 1080p.

There's no reason that it wouldn't be, the rendering resolution is up to the developer of the game, I just hope Nintendo brushes of gimmicky visual features and aims for stable performance first.

It's over. Only Skyrim can save the Switch now

THE WII U WAS FUCKING NATIVE 1080P ON FIRST PARTY NINTENDO GAMES, ARE YOU TELLING ME ITS FUCKING 720p U P S C A L E D WITH SHITTY FXAA CRAP ON TOP, FUCK O F F

The real kicker, the thing that has to be done is to look at your competition and say

I think the Wii commecials had the right idea actually. Send some Japanese men in suits door to door with a prototype and have them beg people to buy this thing.

tell them the mini-controllers have rumble
they'll buy it as a sex toy

DID SOMEONE SAY ALIUMS?!

Tech Demos.

You realize this is a standard technique for editing ads, right? The video alone says little besides what was already rumored, so I'm more concerned that they fucked up in sony vegas.

...

Honestly though, if this new Nintendo console removes Nintendo splitting themselves between two platforms and allows them to publish for a single console/handheld hybrid, it will easily have the best library of all the consoles. If the Wii U had the 3DS's library last/this gen, it would have been a no contest.

Gaems.

That said, this thing is stupid, and Nintendo should feel bad for having made it.

1) Lots of removable parts that people will lose when they take it other places.

2) Looks fragile as fuck, which would be fine if it was smaller (less area to fuck it up), but it's the size of a goddamned tablet

3) It's tablet-sized. This is the worst size for a portable device; it doesn't fit in your pocket, but it's not large enough to justify putting it in a purse/backpack/etc.

Nintendo, the Wii had notable problems - people fucking throwing their controllers at the TV on accident, for starters. This, however, is more obviously stupid; an average person can point out glaring design flaws, your fucking engineers should have gotten their heads out of their asses long enough to notice this shit.

The things a nintendo console, you know its gunna be bulletproof. Really only your third point is valid, but most chicks carry their phone in their purses anyway

Are you retarded or just baiting

Release a force feedback dildo attachment.

Already done.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rez_(video_game)#Trance_Vibrator

Upscaling 720p up doesn't make it 1080p you faggot

Free system + free game of your choice if you kill a nigger (with proof) with video footage.

He means the tablet screen would be 720p, but the hardware is capable of outputting 1080p via HDMI when docked and battery drain isn't an issue.

I have an idea. You ready?

Make good games for it. I know, I know your mind is officially blown by my unparalleled genius and out-of-the-box ideas.

ninty found a better model

I'd invest in a time machine and convince Nintendo to not use cartridges for the N64 and change the design of the controller.

Get a golden parachaute and bail out.

But you'd only get the maybe two or three people that aren't larping with the day of the rope shit

This. Remember how Nintendo did a 180 ten years ago when they initially said the DS wasn't supposed to replace the GBA. Then once the DS started selling, GBA support washed up immediately.

That's a good idea, but first you'd have get Nintendo to fix their emulation, like getting their SNES emulator to run Super FX games like Star Fox, and completely replace their Nesticle tier NES emulator.

I would offer my apologies then quit the company out of shame.

They're potentially already doing that with Beyond Good & Evil 2

SPLATOON AS A LAUNCH TITLE

Fuck you in advance, Nintendo

I would emphasise the hybrid nature of the device since it's a combination of both the home console and the portable handheld by giving it an appropriate name. Switch is good, but doesn't drive the point home enough. I would call it the Wii One.

It's that fucking clicking man.

You can tell from the video how satisfying clicking those controllers in and out of the game switch will be.

It's like how Alkaseltser tablets are two small ones instead of one big one because it's more satisfying to drop them in the water.

Monster Hunter exclusivity

That will probably happen

Autists are going to love that.

Double those prices and it would actually be very close to what Nintendo would charge.

Animal Crossing: [Something Something Subtitle]
Launch title for Nintendo Switch in March 2017; available separately or in a bundle with an Isabelle controller skin.

just to clarify, a full-release game. Not stupid spin-off shit like HHD or Amiibo Festival

That's actually a very good idea

Of course it's a joke you dumb shit, how could skyrim even be an exclusive when it's a 5 year old game already? Learn to read nigger.

of course, you could get it separately as well, BUT it'd be $20 cheaper to buy the bundle than buy them all separately; in this proposal anyway.

Nintendo should hire me as a business consultant. I could unfuck their shit. Though honestly all it'd require is someone with some fucking common sense to begin with.

I still can't get over how blatantly hostile Ubisoft acted towards Nintendo and their own consumer base.

I'd say their better off headhunting to increase their domestic talent. Their competing in a market with giant corporations who can and do buy their partners out of their contracts. And consumers end up paying for that bullshit thanks to long delays and unoptimized software.

More stuff like Bayonetta 2, less bullshit like Rayman Legends and Watchdogs.

Create a Donald Trump's Presidential Tycoon

It's a shame Ubisoft will never make a big budget Rayman game again. I play Rayman 2 once every 3-5 years and it's still great.

Why isn't Nintendo dead already?
They jewed us 80s kids like nothing else.

The Wii U had a lot of great exclusives that sold very well considering the system's relatively small install base. To this day it has arguably the best library out of any console from its generation. Poor marketing, branding, and an unappealing design were the reasons for its failure, not the library.

Most of the Switch's potential install base has never had a chance to play any of those games. This puts Nintendo in a unique position in the history of the game industry, where they can simply port over their entire Wii U library and have an amazing launch lineup that all of the people that skipped the Wii U would buy in droves, now that there is a non-doomed platform to play them on.

However, it is also important to please and pique the interest of the hardcore fans that bought a Wii U. These people, the ones most likely to become early adopters, will not be interested in straight ports. Launch with nothing but straight ports and Breath of the Wild (which they can always buy on Wii U if push comes to shove), and they will hold off until the true sequels and exclusives arrive. This would deny Nintendo crucial momentum.

One extreme is to port games more or less directly to get them on the market ASAP for the newfags. The other is to develop full sequels to please the oldfags. It is a balancing act to find the right compromise between the two.

For most singleplayer games, I think it would be too much work to add enough content to get all but the most hardcore of autists to buy them twice. Add a few bonus levels, increase the rendering resolution and use the higher quality source textures that I hope they have lying around (assuming the Switch is significantly more powerful than the Wii U, which we don't know for sure yet) and take any repeat purchases you can get.

Many of the Wii U's best selling games are multiplayer, however. Mario Kart 8, Super Smash Bros, Splatoon, and so on. These games people will be much more willing to buy any kind of sequel to, so that they can keep up with the rest of the player base. For these games, I think it makes sense to go the extra mile to make the oldfags happy. For instance, we have already seen a glimpse of a new Splatoon in the trailer with new maps, weapons, and categories of gear (hairstyles and pants). Add enough content like that and promise to trickle out more as DLC like they did with the original game, and they will easily get the fans on board.

They could drive a lot of repeat sales to both categories if they offered reduced price "upgrades" to owners of the Wii U versions of these games. But for multiplayer, they will probably prefer to do whatever it takes to get people to buy the games at full price twice.

Get this blitzkrieg of ports and half-sequels out in time for launch and the following months, and for the love of god include a better game than Nintendoland, and I think they will be successful. Pack-in Breath of the Wild and it will sell like hotcakes.

Maybe in Japan.

Call it the 4DS and be done with it.

But it neither has 4D nor dual screens.

Must be a roaring success then.

Announce some fucking games already.
WHERE ARE THE GAMES NINTENDO

I should add that all of Nintendo's previous consoles either launched with an amazing pack-in game (Tetris, the various Mario titles) or didn't start selling until they offered bundles that did (Mario Karts for the DS/3DS/Wii U, AC:NL, Splatoon, etc). They would have to be extremely short sighted and stupid not to pack-in Breath of the Wild with the launch units, which could single-handedly get the entire Youtube e-celeb-watching millennial faggot audience on board.

Great ideas. Farm out the franchises that they clearly have no internal will to work on to third parties, and start bankrolling exclusives.

I would not be surprised if this were true. For a variety of reasons NVIDIA's mobile division has been hemorrhaging money for a long time. They desperately needed a deal like this to justify their existence to the higher ups and drive the economies of scale that could make them relevant to the mainstream phone and tablet manufacturers again.

I don't know of a single first-party Wii U game that wasn't 720p upscaled.

I don't think they will be targeting the 3DS audience at launch, but the second wave of Switch games will definitely be full blown sequels to all of their more portable-heavy franchises.

In the long run I agree. Nintendo is generally better at developing nurturing relationships with acquisitions and second parties than western publishers that love to buy ambitious devs and run them into the ground.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_best-selling_Wii_U_video_games
Almost all of these games sold significantly more around the world than they did in Japan. Not that that is a huge accomplishment, since it's the entire world market vs Japan, but it's not like the Wii U was a PSP or Vita that completely bombed outside of its home.

who are you quoting

They should've shown Smash esports in the trailer. That would have generated much more hype than splatoon.

The third installment was better than the second in my opinion.

Splatoon is more popular then smash in japan. Smash didn't even sell million copies over there.

There are two main ways people use portables.
Westerners mostly play at home lying in bed, sitting on the couch, or taking a shit. It really doesn't matter at all to them how portable the Switch is.
Japs mostly play while riding the train to school or work. They almost certainly need some kind of bag or backpack to carry their supplies to and fro. It's highly unlikely that they would have ever carried their DS or 3DS in their pockets in the first place. Carrying a Switch or other tablet-sized device instead is not a big difference. This is pretty obvious if you remember how fuckhueg the original Game Boy was.

The real portability problem is the analog sticks. Those are not going to play nice with being stuffed inside a bag constantly. But since the Switch has detachable controllers, I fully expect they will come out with an alternate set of controllers that use 3DS-style analog nubs instead.
I also will not be surprised if a year or two down the line, they release a minified, possibly portable-only version with an GBA SP-like design: Clamshell, screen on the top, non-detachable controls on the bottom. This can appease the women that want a tiny Animal Crossing machine to fit in their purses.
Until one of these options exists, I suspect they will not phase out the 3DS completely.

1. It could be because they plan to launch with the Splatoon sequel/rehash soon, aren't doing so with Smash, and don't have anything good to show yet.
2. As says Splatoon seems to be more popular than Smash in Japan. I dunno how well the 3DS version sold there, though.
3. Sakurai hates the competitive Smash community, while the Splatoon devs are cautiously trying to embrace theirs.

A better marketing campaign than the Wii U and only put adults/teens in the ads, NO KIDS. And send a clear message about what the hardware can do. Even the 3 minute NS unveil trailer from last week has more views in 2 days than the original E3 2011 Wii U reveal trailer (which had over 11 million view compared to the NS which now has 17 million)

The emulator in the NES classic mini is supposdly better than Nintendo's current one, so hopefully they can use that in the future.

You don't need to pack in BoTW, it can be a sales success like TP was for the Wii launch when it was sold separately (and the GCN version released slightly later afterwards except in Japan)

That need to be a in game hat for a Splatoon sequel.

...

I could see them packing in Breath of the Wild for a special pack in edition but it's costing them $60 mil I think they want to sell it separately to make back that money.

Wind Waker HD was 1080

1. Good games

2. Battery life > 5 hours

3. Open OS architecture like Android for dem APPZZZ

That partially has to do with how long they were secretive about it, everyone and their mothers were wondering what the fuck it was by now.
No seriously, even my mom was talking about it the day before the reveal.

Even Mario kart 8 wasn't upscaled what the hell are you saying

what the fuck are you breathing

Apparently the audio is shit. I wouldn't put too much faith in it.
NES emulation is a solved problem, they really should suck up their pride, pay an open source emu dev for a proprietary license and be done with it.

No one would fault them for doing that, but I think it would be a missed opportunity. Twilight Princess apparently sold nearly 9 million copies and was the best selling Zelda game of all time. They could sacrifice one Zelda game that could be expected to sell in the single digits of millions on its own, and use it to both drive sales of the console that can be made up later, and help retake the 10's of millions of casuals that have fond memories of Nintendo games but haven't kept up with them for years and won't play a "real game" until they're reminded, with a push, why they liked them as kids.

should i buy a new ds now or save up for the switch™?

Sad thing is this would actually work.

Unless the system can handle software emulation of the GC/WIi/Wii U its not going to happen. Those ran on Power architecture and the reason the Wii could play GC games and the Wii U could play Wii (and GC when hacked) games is because each CPU was similar but just higher clocked in each iteration, so it was easy to just run the system in "GC mode" or "Wii mode". The Tegra SoC line is ARM architecture based, like the DS line, so hardware support is not there. We will probably get DS and 3DS VC support but not cartridge support.

only that nintendo wouldnt allow all those lewd jap games on their console. or at least thats highly unlikely. so how would that be the vita 2?

Yes they would and they have, even their own game had semi lewd petting but it was removed thanks to SJW faggotry at NoA.

It needs casuals. Port all of the sports and memegames that normalfags love and it'll be the greatest console ever with the best library.

Have games.

yeah, senran kagura being on there is still kinda surprising to me. bayonetta 2 on wii u was also a surprise. this just proves my point that these games seem to be exceptions.
theres still not even a fraction of the amount of lewd vita games on nintendo consoles (feel free to prove me wrong though), and i wouldnt bet that this will happen anytime soon. also i wouldnt really count the petting as lewd, but too lewd for NoA it seems. the stella whatever witch srpg art looked nice, but i didnt really look into it.
i'd love to see more japanese games being brought over, but i still highly doubt that the switch will be the platform for this.

maybe youre gay so they didnt like you

Outside of maybe Hilda's and Nanako's outfits, there was nothing lewd in Stella Glow. And those were relatively tame, really. Mordi best girl anyway.

Never forget that Switch merges 3ds and Wii U user bases. It means Monster fucking Hunter with next gen graphics, and bunch of other games that were stuck on handhelds unfairly.

Well apparently they've settled on arguing with people on games websites.
For anyone interested, go to a games site and find the switch reveal article. Take a look down in the comments section and you'll find one guy who's an obvious shill trying and failing to argue with people who are skeptical about the switch.

I want redditors trying way to hard to fit in to leave

actually get some third party games for the console

launch it with Smash bros for the Switch, like an ultimate Smash bros 4:

Launch it with Mario 3D platformer title
Launch it with Breath of the Wild
Launch it with new Donkey Kong. All these 3 for the nintyfag audience
Launch it with Megaman X9 for nostalgiafag audience
Launch it with new F-zero NX for the niche/patrician audience
Launch it with some new COD to grab the casual audience exclusive to Switch
Launch it with Tatsunoko vs capcom 2 to grab the nigger / FGC audience
Monster Hunter 5 NX exclusive for the gook audience

All in silky smooth 60fps

There you go. Solid Launch library. no gimmicks. all about the games.

The Great Escape is the only good Rayman.

BEHOLD THE POWER OF FREE SOFTWARE

Bundle it with zelda or mario kart

When Nintendo said that they haven't released a 3DS successor yet, I think this is what they mean. Nintendo doesn't have the manpower to split their software development into two separate platforms anymore so I think the 3DS successor is just going to be a handheld-only model of the NS that will be able to play all the same games.

This makes sense. There must be ways to make it cheaper improve its battery life by making it handheld only.

Yeah. I'd also suggest that they make a more powerful console variant but the Switch seems like Nintendo's concession that they can no longer want to compete in the traditional home console market with Sony and Microsoft.

If it's possible to make a completely portable version like this, why even bother with the pseudo-portable version?

And I don't think early-adopter money is the answer. Seems to me all this announcement has done is draw criticism for Nintendo trying to have their cake and eat it too…I can't imagine many people outside of the absolute hardass fanboys getting the Switch.

I can actually see it being successful if it's sold at an aggressive price and is strong enough to receive 3rd party ports. If western 3rd parties find the Switch to be easy enough to port over their yearly titles to and create a gaming library that's attractive to non-Nintendo fans, it will probably be successful. That's one of the big question marks to me – can Nintendo create a library that's interesting enough to attract gamers who don't care about Nintendo games?

Kids playing Pokemon.

# This is the first Nintendo console in a decade that hasn't had physical backwards-compatibility as a crutch to increase its 'launch library'. As said, their physical offerings at the Switch launch will almost certainly be a mix of brand-new games and ports of the best-selling Wii U titles, but what about digital-only games? Even if it's just a flood of Virtual Console titles, Switch really ought to have 50 or more games ready at launch.

# Three out of four console players are mouthbreathing normalfags who exclusively buy shit that ~everyone~ has heard of. Nintendo had almost no third-party normalfag game releases after the launch window, and the results speak for themselves. If the Switch wants to maintain any sort of momentum, then they need to win back the third-party publishers and aim for parity with the third-party output on Sony and Microsoft's consoles (Skyrim Remastered and NBA Whatever imply that they're trying, at least)

# Ever since Iwata's death, goodwill with the fans has been in steep decline. If you want more than just the hardcore autists in-line at the midnight launch, pander the FUCK towards the folks who actually bought all the worthwhile shit on 3DS and Wii U. Scan through people's Nintendo Accounts for relevant data, and offer different things for different circumstances (eg. log into a Nintendo Account created years ago on the previous consoles, get one of these Switch games for free). Hell, maybe build on My Nintendo's coupon rewards and let people get % discounts on the Switch hardware bundle (at participating retailers) by completing special objectives?

# Fire and replace the entire executive board at NoA, then force all the other NoA employees to re-apply for their jobs.

so, does that thing have a 3d screen?

...

I'd buy a gun and shove it on their mouths and threaten to blow their brains out unless they buy the Switch. Because it seems the only way anyone will buy this proto-tablet piece of shite with awful controllers, awful battery life, and a probable awful lineup of games.

It wasn't until I saw your picture that I realized how horrible the Switch's control layout is. It's going to be awkward as fuck trying to rest your thumb without touching the right stick. You can see it right in the clawlike pose used in the ad.
If only they had fixed both sticks to the top like the Wii U, or widened the controller area a bit so that the right stick could be tucked in closer to the screen, it would be so much more comfortable. Instead they gave up that and the d-pad for the stupid shareable gamepad gimmick.

They can use a smaller screen and backlight. Other than that I see no reason why a smaller Switch would have better battery life. If anything it could be worse due to battery size restrictions.

Normalfags are going nuts over this. Holla Forums's tastes are far outside of the mainstream, and while that means Holla Forums usually has more interesting things to say than everyone else, it also means that no one here has a fucking clue how the normalfags think or what excites them. For all we know "real Skyrim in my backpack" was all it took to blow their minds to smithereens.

Shit. I'd probably crack.

Spla2n will probably be fun too but I dunno if it'll be half as fun to play without the motion aided aiming. One of the precious few tines a waggle gimmick actually worked out for the better.

Ubisoft announced another Just Dance for the Switch. That all but proves the gamepads have gyros.

So how many of you will stand in line next to all the sweaty midnight shoppers at FUCKING GAMESTOP? I'll bring cookies.

I'll wait for a price drop.

Or the next iteration which will inevitably improve on the portability, the battery life or add in a crucial feature that the first version didn't have.

Of course, all of this depends on the library of games. If no gaems, then no buy.

Push the ever loving shit out of local multiplayer.

Have some kind of sim game on it (where the FUCK did Pilotwings go, Big fucking N?). I miss the days of SimCity and SimAnt on my SNES (I would kill for a new Maxis style SimEarth).

hope the Switch is able to revive lan parties.

I'm not committing to anything until I see the specs and launch lineup. Even if I do get tricked into buying at launch, I'd rather order online than wait in line for hours with a bunch of putrid nerds to give Gamestop my money.

That would be cool. Getting kids to meet in person for vidya again.

That is one sad picture. makes me feel better about myself though. Shadenfreude is a bitch

I didn't even realize the control stick was lower on the right side than the left either until you pointed it out. Although imagining it one can see it sort of works out, it does rest on the control stick, which is fine for shooters, for many of the genres that utilize buttons far more than the C-Stick, it will raise questions of how easy it will be to manipulate the thing.

Although honestly I had plenty of reservations on the Wii-U controller too, especially when I first pulled it out of the box, but it was actually pretty decently comfortable

I really hope you're right man, gyro's on the Wii-U definitely helped make Splatoon feel so incredibly smooth.

So, can I play monster and splatoon on this? Is it hard copies that fit in, or is it all digital?

I would emphasis the ease of switching between portable and console modes, and the fact that the system has the development of actual studios behind it (maybe) or at least a narrow scope of hardware.

Tablets have been getting more and more powerful, though they've been held back by the fact that they're using shitty apis, and a mish-mash of libraries made for android (don't get me started with the issues android introduces to things like memory management and the like)

If I were a sales person, that's the angle I'd push, since it's using custom hardware paired with custom software, custom written libraries, and the like, and the fact that you can dedicate it to a set standard means the software (once they decide to reveal it) will be fully fledged games, and what you're carrying around is essentially a portable "next-gen" console.

Vita came pretty close, though it was gimped in far too many areas and was still a portable first and foremost. Spell it out to normalfags that this is literally a portable console, a portable 360 1.5 (or if Carmack's review of tablet hardware is correct, a portable Ps4 0.5)

Even if it's just a "tablet" the ARM architecture has had potential for a long time to compete with the big boys, though it was never focused on due to heat issues and chipsets being a tad too big, though that's changed over the past 2 years.

I don't know, I'm personally excited for the switch because it's a chance to bring hardware with potential to do great things to the forefront, instead of wasting it on netflix, facebook, and shitty android games with great lighting, and textures, but shit polygon count and even worse animations, or AI.

Purse Owner 5 Za Golden on day 1.
Billion sales guaranteed.

Nigga, is this the first time you saw buttons and sticks alternating?

embrace the dog meme

Run commerical for new horror/fps where you are the killer, brutally hunting down people in superb hd that looks almost real.
The game is called Japanese Game Dev and the victims all look like members of Treehouse.
However there is no release date mentioned and on closer inspection the entire game footage seems to actually be a video recording. No one is able to get through to Nintendo of America for confirmation.

...

...

...

whats wrong anons

On traditional game controllers, the buttons and sticks angled away from each other so that you can rest your thumb/palm on either without touching the other. See the second pic: He is holding it flat (could be even flatter) and touching the sticks and buttons with the joint of his thumb.

Now look at the Switch picture again. See how his hand is arched, using the tip of his thumb to touch the face buttons? You can't rest your right hand flat on the console because there's a fucking stick in the way.

it's stupid, they did it just to facilitate their gay 2 player controller gimmick. I kind of like that about it, gives some kind of famicom feel, but it's still gay. Still the worst thing is that it has no god damn D pad. They've fucked up a lot of things with their controllers over the years but I feel like that is a legendary new low.

Make the top part of one and the bottom part of another be able to combine into a bigger screen for party games like mario party for a double resolution screen (of course, without the black border

i'd fuck that until it pukes cum

Furries please leave

hopefully, Nintendo will rectify that problem or there will be 3rd party solutions because if you try angling a normal gamepad to mimic the way the right side of the controls are arranged, you constantly accidentally hit the analog stick when trying to press the face buttons.

Do not contaminate a Holla Forums meme with Zootopia cancer.

but user you want the fluff don't you?

...

This is at least four different types of autism.

that would be 299.99 sir
see how the dog meme works?

I'd bet money that within 6 months of launch they'll have an ergonomic joy-con set to attach to the Switch

I honestly wouldn't be surprised if Nintendo themselves are pushing it.

what if i just rape you and leave you in a puddle of sexual fluids? i don't have to pay for that.

...

Fuck, they will do that. I forgot Nintendo makes a large amount of their money in peripherals.

what the fuck is this shit?

Make it fully open source; hardware, software and vidya

I could see it happening. Remember Wigger Wednesday?

You'd have a better time chugging a pitcher of Drano.
Trust me.

no money = no dog
only niggers steal electronics

i'll be a nigger for a day then, you hot little dog

Who's making these anyway? Looks like kekitopu.

The dogfuckers (not content enough with the general negative reaction to the Switch) have decided to make it seem even more cancerous by making its console-tan into furjuden fapbait.

post anal

thats because it is

you need to go back

I love that glorious bastard is that you kek?

I was thinking more of a third party like Hori would. They like to make ergonomic grips for handhelds.

yes

That's pretty standard for handhelds because they want to keep it as compact as possible are you really trying to grasp at every straw now?

You're as stupid as people complaining that the portable can't be put in your pocket and don't understand how this isn't an issue, it never stopped the orignal Gameboy from being a success, or the 3ds XL or the the PSP, or tablets.

I can't wait to hear about people complaining about the screens being made out of just under a million tiny dots.

It's like they never owned a bookbag.

It's like they've never worked a job more like it.

make porn of doggo pleaseno rush though

aaaand you just went bankrupt

Holla Forums doesnt play shit, they just pretend they did as an excuse to shitpost

but I don't like to draw dudes

don't make it a dude then

get out

You might as well because you're already a faggot :^)

No shit sherlock. Point is that in trying to make this control scheme work for both home and portable use, they made it suck for both.
For home, it sucks because the stick gets in the way when you're using the face buttons.
For portable, it sucks because it has giant protruding sticks instead of mini sticks or analog nubs.
But really as says they did it for the shareable controllers gimmick. They couldn't stagger the placement or they'd become even more asymmetrical and awkward to hold in share mode.

Wow good job you copy and pasted . Thank you for your insight.

sage is not a downvote

Tell them to scrap it and start over.

Is this thing backward compatible?

I can see it being successful with the casual crowds.

so you're shilling for nintendo with porn now?

you did not seem to mind nignog

No. It's running an entirely different architecture from the last 3 homes consoles. Will not be backwards compatible at all. I'm sure they'll find a way to charge a premium for porting "remasters" of old shit everyones already played though.

I would get Nintendo back in the taxi game and have built in switches so patrons can get in a game of smash or Mario Kart in on there way to their destination

No shit, m8. I'm not bumping because my posts aren't relevant. Do you not know how sage is meant to be used?

damn right

now post more switchdog getting fucked

to get dubs

Viewtiful Joe 3 as a launch title

I'm working on Switch-tan

Release Switch in a single $349 bundle with the dock included and Zelda packed in. Give away the razors to sell the blades.
Allow simple license-to-NNID attachment like the rest of the world. If you bought Super Mario World on Wii U/N3DS, download it for free on Switch.
Sign Andy Gavin and Jason Rubin, give them a blank check to set up a studio somewhere cheap, like Utah or Colorado.
Back Wayforward, make them the new Rare, and make Shantae a staple of Nintendo devices. Do the same with Marvelous and Story of Seasons.
Back SNK into making an exclusive 8th Metal Slug and a multi-volume Neo Geo compilation and concurrent arcade stick attachment.
Back Sega into making an updated conversion of F-Zero GX. Test the waters. Try to sign them for another Panzer Dragoon game or something.
Back CDPR into converting The Witcher series for Nintendo devices.
Wrangle Intelligent Systems back into making a proper third Paper Mario. Get them not to fix what isn't broken.
Back Squeenix into translating any new Dragon Quest games. Make them the first properly marketed JRPGs since Kingdom Hearts.
Fire Treehouse and other shitty translators out of a cannon, across Lake Washington, to the Capitol Hill quasi-slums where they belong.
Release a new Smash Bros. game, concurrent with CAT5 and Gamecube port dongles. Create a matchmaking system based on an ever-present style score. Invite top players to an official tournament in Seattle, streamed live, and hosted by someone funny and likable.

Market Switch as the real next-generation device. Pay homage to Wendy's "Where's the Beef?" campaign with a few high schoolers around a PS4 asking "Where are the games?". Call back to Sega's famously aggressive ad campaigns for Genesis, pushing the fact that you're nickel-and-dimed on the other machines just to play online with your friends.

that's a pretty expensive sex toy

GOD DAMN IT! NO!

Fuck yes.

I like it better than the dog already.

True, but it doesn't beat the power suit ver. imo, regardless of sexual attraction.

i prefer the dog

1) Have games made for it. We need not only the new Zelda game, but games using some of our other IPs, as well as some comfy games people can come back to and play casually. It doesn't need a powerful launch, but it needs releases shortly following it. If we can't manage that, we WILL fail.

2) It's a tablet, so it's not gonna be a powerhouse – we can work with that. Advertise it as a console that's mediocre in power, but able to contend with its competition by virtue of the fact that it's got good games. Whether it's stated outright, or if it's done by taking jabs at the others (Sonyggers watching movies, Xboners yelling at their consoles trying to make it work) doesn't matter. This part depends heavily on the first point, though.

In short, take the Sega Genesis route for advertising, while actually making games. Ninten need to do what Sega did.

Checked.

Yeah, gay is just a novelty, dog is forever your best friend.

Dogs won't give you aids, or becoming a cheating slut, or leech of you and make your life a miserable hellhole.

Something you want to talk about, user?

Well now it's just trash.
I don't mind homosexuals, but traps are absolute shit-tier.

Not anymore, sometimes I get memories of things way back then. I have someone new in my life, but I still get melancholy and frustrated when I see femboys like that.
I used to be uncomfortable with myself because I wanted to be something I was not genetically destined to be. Now I've embraced myself and I'm pretty much comfortable with myself, the wound is still there. It's a long, long, aggravating frustrating story, think goodnight pun-pun

While part of the concept is a cuteboy switch, a trap adds another layer.
Bait and switch

user, it just sounds like you're inserting your fetish into this.
It will not get adopted by anybody when it has that kind of autism, the current tan gets porn, yeah, but it wasn't made with a fetish in mind.

Nice to hear things got better and you're moving forward.

I'm not. I did just explain the reasoning to you didn't I?

...

Her arms should turn into little robots when detached.

Much better, but less sexy.

It's already working.

based

Shut the fuck up.

It's stupid reasoning. Stop lying, you're basically doing what a furry does when they make their OC.

I have to agree, I personally think the drawing is sexy as hell and well made, but It's DEFINITELY fetish fuel.

Anyone have the one with the little girl and the power suit, that one was the most fitting one.

But seriously, those controllers look really uncomfortable.

...

Do you honestly expect a single person to believe that?

Shit, got me.
Well this shit is gay and retarded then.

This one? I'm just not a big fan of the red hair. Seems very arbitrary. Better than making le epic yoooo trap

That's some shit taste you got son.

It's red because of the switch logo, since it's red

Nope, it's close, but the other one has the little girl jump into a suit.

...

what if it was a guy, in a female robot. You'd get both sides of the coin, you'd have console and handheld, the yin yang idea. Better yet, I'd prefer just 2 people, a guy and a girl, left and right, that always stay with each other, and works better with the yin yang thing.

That's a good idea.

I guess I don't. I just designed it off a joke I made in a past thread and made him a particularly girly kind of cute without thinking about it.
I just didn't feel like that was what I was doing because I didn't think "ok let me make a Switch-tan. Well it's got to be a cuteboy because I like cuteboys." I was just rolling with a joke, but in the end you can say it's the same thing.
I'm a very particular person about doing something that's right by the concept, not just what I like, so the accusation bothers me but I'll go ahead and fess up to it.

That's a lot better.

Yeah, red hair is usually my favourite, dunno why I didn't like this one, maybe it's the type of red or the way her lipstick and eyes are exactly the same color, I dunno. You're right about the logo though.

Got nothing like that on google…

wew
I don't buy it.

Jesus Christ, give it fucking a rest.

Hmmm.
Then have it turn into a man or a woman, or a big buff masculine man that becomes very submissive

Make my boner happy

that's a pretty sophistocated boner

Would you kindly all fuck off to Tumblr with your TF trap autism?

I like my traps, and I like my hunks, I'm an idort.

What if I turn it into normal homosexuality, bro?

gay

I'd legit like yours better if it wasn't a boy and you did the robot arms thing right.
The one I posted doesn't emphasize the fact that you can use the controllers separatelly. Unless you wanna play with a desembodied boob.
Making it a male is too farfetched and would defeat the purpose of those console girls for most.

PC is for that. Keep the console tans as girls

I don't see the 'merely pretending' parallel in this
You don't have to believe me, but I said I'll fess up to it anyway.

I kinda like it but it's not all too accurate. The Switch as a home console is still the same console but in a dock.

But PC is the one who does full body transformations

Would you just go the fuck away already?

Fucking HELL!! I smiled like an IDIOT and turned away with a rosy face reading that

Fuck you!~

Nope #AltRight4Life

I'll draw it up as a girl then

Girl with a dick.

fuck off nigger

STOP
POSTING

Nigger please, just go away, you are legitimately annoying as fuck.

Homosexuals are not welcome on this imageboard

reeeeeeeeeeee

An annoying fuck would be rape, zing!
No.

It's not gay if it has a feminine dick.

You're the nigger, nigger.

user stop, you're gonna kill me with that shit

that's it
ur gettin b&, mister

I just came in this thread to tell you are a fucking obnoxious piece of shit that needs to drink bleach. From the look of your posts you're probably a cuckchan refugee, so swallow cyanide too while you're at it.

Nintendo is in the trolling business. Need proof? Just read this thread.

It needs to be able to play all the third party titles available to other consoles and it needs to be able to use standard charging cords like USB-C or USB mirco.

Why do you have to point it out, that ruins the joke chucklefuck.

even the gameBOY?

I just wish they'd stop pretending that the Switch isn't a replacement for both the Wii U and 3DS (I remember back when they first said it wasn't even going to be a fucking console).

I mean the 3DS is getting a bit long in the tooth now, the Wii U is long dead and the Switch basically invalidates any kind of 3DS successor.

(checked)
Well, I can see that one being a trap, would be very clever actually. Is there a tan already?

No idea, but if I remember correctly DS-tan is also a boy.

I think this is one of those situations where they can't say it's a 3DS successor as well since they still have 3DS handhelds and games to sell in 2017. I figure that if the NS is a success by the end of 2017, they'll just shut up about any kind of 3DS successor and maybe come up with a smaller revision of the NS and say that it's their 'handheld' version of the NS.

It can't be…

What's with this thread!?

I suppose I can see them doing that and passing it off as the 3DS successor. No, in fact I actually fully expect that from modern Nintendo.

What would the GameBoy Color and Advance look like?

Customizable full body waifu dock.

yeah, I think it's almost an inevitability that Nintendo is going to eventually come up with a handheld-only version of the NS that can actually fit in a person's pocket when the tech is there and cheap enough.

It's as much of a replacement for the Wii-U as the iPhone is a replacement for the iMac/Mac pro
The Switch is a handheld tablet, which can run phone games, while the Wii-U is a proper 7th gen TV console.
It can't replace the Wii-U, it will never run the games, which run on the Wii-U. Simple as that.
The outdated 3DS is dead though.

Have different models, standard and premium, from the start

With the rummours of laughable battery life and presence or abscesabsence of 3g/4g, I'd go the apple way, and have different models at launch to appease to everyone, since the consumer base of vidya is so diverse.

Cheap model with low battery life and no mobile conection for cheapasses and parents who don't want to spend a fortune on a toy for their kids.
Edpensive model with actually good battery and mobile conection for us weebs and neets.

Because goddamn it might have a great lineup of games, but if the hardware screams "we'll release it again in the future with those two things you wanted user" then I'm not buying.

If the Switch is truly a 3DS (handheld) successor it would be the first time Nintendo has made a (handheld) hardware successor that isn't backward compatible with it's previous handheld game cart format.

1. Advertise it for fuck's sake, do backflips midair to make sure people don't think it's another peripheral for the Wii like with the Wii U
2. 3rd aprty support
It's a pretty safe bet to say Nintendo fans will get it, the question is how to make EVERYONE ELSE get it, they need to make it justifiable to the average consumer to use it as their only vidya machine, most people don't think in terms like 'well it complements the PC nicely' (as enjoyable as i've personally found the Wii U, It will always be second to my PC).

That's basically it, naturally things like grafix also matter but I don't think anyone is expecting something that blows current gen out of the water, people just want it (not even expect it) to relatively be the same.

No dpad is the absolute dumbest thing about this. It's such a shame.

3ds compatibility

Let's say there is.
How do you expect to play 3ds games on it? Physically.

you're not an idort, you're a faggot

Holy fuck the amount of Nintendo fanboying is fucking ridiculous.

Yeah, could at least have gone with something more d-pad shaped, even if they wanted to keep it like ABXY face buttons so much. At least the buttons wouldn't grubs a hike on my thumbs when playing fighting games.

Also this
Don't want to have to wait 1 year for a better battery. Just give it to us now Nintendo.

*grind a hole
Jesus Christmas ducking cellphone auto correct

Thing is they did this with the Wii U and nobody wanted the cheaper model. They ended up having to recall and refurbish them.

They did it with the 3DS- the 2DS and New 3DS- when it was established that were was demand and support.

Sorry Nintendo, i am not gonna do your work for you. Either you man up and fix your company or you die.

Fill each unit with a pound of cocaine.

Reminder the Director of Sticker Star/Color Splash has admitted to have never played neither the Original Paper mario or PM:TTYD.

She also laughed about it and said it wasn't necessary.

Sounds like the bulk of the Holla Forums userbase.

I'm sad now.

...

Rather than having two distinct models, just make a base console package and a pro package that comes with a pack-in game and a pro controller. Creating two distinct models without gauging a market need for both would just waste money and resources out of the gate. If any kind of new model would be created in the future, it would be when nvidia comes up with a remodel of the tegra that consumes less power. If there comes a demand for cheaper 'console-only' or 'handheld-only' versions of the NS, I can also see those happening later.

...

Shit I had no idea that happened. I've been mostly disconected from most things vidya for the last few years, only loosely browsing Holla Forums and mostly ignoring WiiU and 3DS because I don't like their gimmicks.
The DS was my last Nintendo console, and definitely the one I enjoyed the most. Hence why I'm stoked for the switch, because Nintendo finally choose a gimmick that appeases me.