MOTHERFUCKER I THOUGHT I WAS A NIGGER FOR OVER A YEAR

That shit really should be a fucking criminal act. I mean, Jesus Christ, talk about evil, "I'm going to lie to someone about their genetic origin because I don't want them to be racist or something".
FUCK that's some disgusting shit.

The problem is they're strictly not lying.
As their tests have a stated level of uncertainty so saying you have less than 1% african DNA is strictly speaking accurate and legally defensible.

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Isn't that a satire website? Either way it was common knowledge that they manipulated the DNA results to push an agenda.
They were even boasting about it online mocking the "nazis" who "think they are white".

>Morgan admitted to having changed people's results. "We only did this on rare occasions, when we knew they weren't using it as means to harm someone." A lot of this is done under the guise of having the tests line up with what the business already knows of the customer's expectations. It's easier to do that than to deal with an endless parade of clients who are intensely pissed off because they aren't as Dutch as they expected to be.

>Morgan wasn't at all ashamed or guilty about this. And we can't really blame him. If you've ever waited tables, you know how fucking crazy people can get when their expectations are challenged in any way. Now take the anger of someone not booking a reservation they really wanted, and amplify that by someone learning for the very first time that Great Uncle O'Leary's tales about the Emerald Isles were a pack of lies.

>"I only know of two times somebody wanted to be tested for being another ethnicity because they didn't like that ethnicity. Both times, [they were] white people not wanting to believe they had black ancestors." The first of these made an offhand remark that, "'I'm hoping it will show people I'm not black.' And not as a joke. He was serious." The second customer was even less subtle: "He caught himself from saying the N-bomb. He said, 'I want to know if any of my family are ni- black.'"

>Morgan and his colleagues were caught between a rock and a really-want-to-mess-with-racists place. It would've been fun to throw a "10 percent West African" in there, but then they might have a pissed-off, dangerous person at their office, waving a gun. "Since we couldn't do anything to the results (and we wanted to), what we did was add '< 1 percent' to each African category of ethnicity. That way we weren't lying, and they would both be wondering how much under a percentage point was. We always try to round to the nearest number because we sometimes hear about percentage points, but for them, we leave it open to whether it's a one or a zero."

>It's a compromise that's elegant in its passive-aggressive simplicity. And it got a result. "The near-N-bomber wrote to us asking what that meant, and we wrote back that it meant it was under 1 percent. And we were not saying zero. Unless they got another test, that was going to bother them. Maybe they weren't 100 percent Caucasian. I mean, they were, according to the results, but this way it leaves it open, and they'll always be wondering."

>>Morgan admitted to having changed people's results. "We only did this on rare occasions, when we knew they weren't using it as means to harm someone."

Jesus Christ this is poorly written, or at least reasoned.

Which is fucking ridiculous.

(you)

I am not sure…someone asked for a source so I went and found it and then linked the page…(((cracked))) is not on my reading list and never will be so I am not sure who they are…whether it is satire or not.

If you couldn't figure out those

>As you might guess, being Jewish doesn't work that way. There's a big difference between Jewish people who came from European ancestry and someone whose family has been living in the land currently occupied by Israel for thousands of years. "Israel is new … and by saying he's from there by blood, we'd be saying he was Arab.
OY VEY!

>It all comes down to pride, and the unfortunate fact that race matters a lot more to most people than they're willing to admit. There are millions of folks out there who'd never argue one race is superior to another, but who'd fight you to the death if you dared to suggest they were German instead of Scottish. "I've had boyfriends wanting to impress girlfriends, somebody who wanted to get into the Knights of Columbus, and I even had someone trying to prove he was part Native American to join a tribe. We won't change for fraudulent reasons, and besides, even if we did, these tests only give an indication. They aren't 100 percent. A man who wanted the results changed to being more Native American told us from the first sentence that he was trying to join a tribe, but no test gave him any Native American blood. Ours didn't either."

Well it is and is not ridiculous.
If anything it's covering their bases in a legal context if someone gets a more accurate test and finds nigger DNA when the other test said zero.

The whole field right now is in its infancy and really REALLY dodgy.
Don't make life decisions based on these tests unless they show something massive and overwhelming.
If you're a yank then don't bother with them as you're all mystery meat to one degree or another.

I am always pushing for Ethno-Strasserist Indo-European ONLY nations, but this is slightly disappointing to contemplate if true. I'm pretty tired of the whole (((crypto))) invasion that has been ongoing in Europe for the last 2,000 years.

Likely jewish white and lowering it to 1% from 30 - 60% ni- I mean black, would be doing them a favor.
Mleh, this story is bullshit.

No, its just ridiculous, a product of litigious semites taking over our fucking legal system.

That's just it though, they are urging people to do exactly that, to view themselves in that context, that's the whole appeal they run with in advertising!

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Before you buy these tests they do make it clear if you read through the provided material that they aren't terribly accurate and their many limitations.

If you fall for the flashy advertising campaign then you're an idiot and deserve every self inflicted hardship you bring upon yourself with it

This is why I always tell people not to bother with those dna results. They'll lie to your face and sleep like babies thinking "the end justifies the means. i defeated a nazi today!"

so a person was adopted and they fucking lied about her origins because the labkikes didnt want to hurt her feels or whatever

or it could have easily been a blind test to check the reliability of that lab

Actually of all the races Whites are the least inclined to interbreed outside of their heritage…when the parasitic jews found that out they were upset that we were not inclined to become mystery meat and began the full court press to miscegenation in the MSM. There used to be this fantastic study online that showed all the races propensity for miscegenation and Whites were the least likely of any race to participate. I don't know about you guys but I was raised with very strict rules about what was 'dating material' and what was not 'dating material'. I have never felt the need to look outside for anything different because everything I could ever want was within my own people.

They are openly gas lighting Europeans into thinking they are all "mixed".

srsly

DNA "Ancestry" reports are built on a clusterfuck of half assed correlations and arbitrary decisions. Never take them as the word of god. Here's an example from 23andme, of someone explaining to a sandnigger why his results were so confusing:

If you want ancestry analysis, you have to take the raw data and run it through an analysis yourself somehow. Other services are a bit more sneaky with their bullshittery.
When it comes to raw data though, 23andme is in fact pretty decent for the cost.

The raw DNA data can be VERY useful for other things, such as finding mutations that may be severely affecting your life that you were not even aware was not normal or could be fixed with targeted nutrition. There's all sorts of fuckery that go can on such as not being able to process certain forms of B vitamins or accumulating too much iron. Much of this will require intensive personal research on your part though.
An excellent resource for exploring what is possible: archive.is/T8ZGU geneticlifehacks.com/biohacks-experiments-and-optimizations-based-on-my-genetics/
There's other things on the site such as an excel file you can use to search through your data.

Do you need a pic of my pink skin or something

Eating semen could throw off the results..

I think 23andme charges extra for additional information. The first test is the lure.

Fucking garbage, FAKE NEWS then,

For turning a shit thread into a good one in one post have my gratitude dear user.

we need to start adding Ifunny label to overused memes, as a meta mem

Aww thanks user.
This one's going in the scrapbook.

Did you even read their documentation? The margin of error for these DNA tests is at least 4%. Mine came back part kike and I'm sure it's only to give my (((judeo-Christian))) family something to LARP about.

Based on your post, though, I'd say your a nigger regardless of your genetic makeup.

They ALWAYS add in part kike/nigger to the average white folk. It's probably their policy.

I pity those who can't trace their lineage back with the documents, family heirlooms, and crests preserved by their grandparents and older relatives.

One of the only things nearly as bad as finding out there is some nigger or mud or kike dna in your lineage is having criminality in your lineage who changed names to avoid the law.

Even if you were 1% nigger you have every right to ensure your children are .5% nigger, their children .25%

Of course we called this shit years ago.

you know that mean jack shit, right

ps. pure bavarian phenotype checking in. 1% trace DNA from the Caucasus, that's it, you worthless nigger

Hi.
Autists.
I have been warning you all about this for over 2 years with these tests.

Is anyone honestly surprised? Pretty obvious they intended to lie that everyone (especially white) was part nog to spread a false mindset of less resistance to diversity.

No you're just a paranoid tinfoiler, of course every European in the world has 5-10% African DNA. Everybody's great grandparent was African!

If you give DNA with no identifying information all they know is someone in the world has your DNA. Tell me what you think that accomplishes. Let's say someone has that DNA and thinks it's yours. How are they going to prove it? They'd need to do a DNA test and if they can do that they don't need the unidentified DNA in the first place you fucking mong.

The only possible security risk of giving DNA for a test with no identifying information is the material being planted somewhere, which would be a fucking weird move given that they don't know who you are. "Let's frame somebody for a crime." "Who?" "I dunno, just grab one of the anons from cold storage." Might as well tell people not to shit in toilets because they can get your DNA from the sewer.

You won't get my DNA, Jews!

>op is too retarded to realize that (((dna tests))) are a kike scam and fell for them

I'd rub one out over their corpses though, fam.

No, he trusted the jew

Jews will fuck you over on every occasion. And 23andJew still got his money.

oh god, 23andme? my conspiracy theory was right?

le mao even a nigger isnt that stupid

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that's what you get

Not only are DNA testing sites tracking you and using your genes for their (((database))) the results aren't accurate at all.

AND they admit to tampering

This.

Granted.
But the peace of mind my 100% European results provided were worth it.
t. millennial burger
t. Previous degenerate so (((they)))
already had my fingerprint and DNA from a false arrest 5 years ago

If you're that scared of zog, use a clean email, alias, and VPN. What exactly are you worried will come of it, nigger?

Pic related

It used to be satire, now it's (((satire))).

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If you think that a DNA test that says

This is why you should spend $20 bucks for a membership on a genealogy website, rather than $150 on a nascent commercial technology.

Wasn't 23andme selling your dna results to the feds?

You're dumb for believing it tbh. I never believed it when they said I was 1/1000th dindu.

Yes

all coons must hang

Probs m8, not sure. Am sure about checkin those trips though

>posting stale, 4cucks /int/ (((maymays)))

Trips don't lie…
>Selling it to (((themselves))) and implying (((they))) don't already have access.
Real Shoa overdue.
DOtR now.
Shit's gotta start somewhere.

Apologies for the stale memes, user. But momentum > novelty at this stage given the audience. Go ahead and drop them new non-anime NatSoc feminine glamour shots when you have a minute.

Oh so that's how they gave Craig Cobb a 16% nigger DNA, announced in front of an audience of hundreds of niggers.

Stale as fuck, I know, and sage for off topic. Hopefully it's ammo for some user somewhere

You're a nigger-kike.

Those tattoos are disgusting.
Please leave.

>If you couldn't figure out those

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